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1
00:00:08,555 --> 00:00:09,823
Stop it, garbage boy!
2
00:00:09,923 --> 00:00:13,660
Stop it!
3
00:00:28,708 --> 00:00:31,244
Nora? Wally?
4
00:00:31,344 --> 00:00:34,481
What a beautiful day!
5
00:00:34,581 --> 00:00:36,282
What if we all...
6
00:00:40,086 --> 00:00:41,888
They must be at work already.
7
00:00:42,489 --> 00:00:43,890
100 percent.
8
00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:02,141
This is my new chair.
9
00:01:02,241 --> 00:01:06,980
I found it in a dumpster
off of Queens Boulevard!
10
00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:09,482
Ooh, that's nice.
11
00:01:09,483 --> 00:01:11,250
Speaking of hand-me-downs,
12
00:01:11,350 --> 00:01:14,220
my grandson gave me
all of his shirts...
13
00:01:14,320 --> 00:01:16,656
and house shorts, so nothing
goes to waste.
14
00:01:16,756 --> 00:01:18,825
My niece asked if
I needed new shoes,
15
00:01:18,925 --> 00:01:20,169
and I laughed at her for
45 minutes!
16
00:01:20,193 --> 00:01:23,530
These bitches are so depressing.
17
00:01:24,230 --> 00:01:25,899
Us old girls
don't need a thing
18
00:01:25,999 --> 00:01:27,333
after a certain point!
19
00:01:27,501 --> 00:01:28,367
That's right!
20
00:01:32,038 --> 00:01:33,306
Who's texting you?
21
00:01:33,406 --> 00:01:35,509
Just Nora.
22
00:01:35,609 --> 00:01:37,043
That reminds me,
23
00:01:37,143 --> 00:01:39,512
I have an appointment with
a foot doctor in a few hours.
24
00:01:39,513 --> 00:01:42,916
Why does Nora remind you
of your foot doctor?
25
00:01:43,016 --> 00:01:44,383
I should go too.
26
00:01:44,518 --> 00:01:46,318
I forgot to get my
World Journal this morning,
27
00:01:46,385 --> 00:01:48,722
and I wanna stare at it
before calling it a night.
28
00:01:48,822 --> 00:01:50,657
Well, it's only
8 o'clock in the morning.
29
00:01:50,757 --> 00:01:52,692
I know! So late!
30
00:01:52,792 --> 00:01:54,761
See ya.
31
00:01:54,861 --> 00:01:56,763
I wouldn't wanna be ya.
32
00:02:32,298 --> 00:02:35,635
Jesus Christ...
33
00:02:35,735 --> 00:02:37,671
All right!
All right!
34
00:02:37,771 --> 00:02:39,573
Come on, don't get your pee hot!
35
00:02:42,441 --> 00:02:45,779
Edmund, what are you doing here?
What's up?
36
00:02:45,879 --> 00:02:48,214
Nothing! You?
37
00:02:48,314 --> 00:02:50,116
Why are you sending me
all these weird texts?
38
00:02:50,216 --> 00:02:51,985
Um, no reason.
39
00:02:52,085 --> 00:02:54,453
Just... wanted to
make sure you were home.
40
00:02:54,588 --> 00:02:55,589
Well, here I am.
41
00:02:55,689 --> 00:02:58,391
Well, I guess I also
had this recent epiphany
42
00:02:58,491 --> 00:03:02,595
after my trip to Iceland
that I love love,
43
00:03:02,596 --> 00:03:05,364
and you and Brenda
are so in love that...
44
00:03:05,464 --> 00:03:07,400
- Okay, go.
- Who are you talking to?
45
00:03:07,500 --> 00:03:08,902
Edmund, what the
fuck is going on?
46
00:03:09,002 --> 00:03:10,036
I'm sorry, Uncle Wally.
47
00:03:10,136 --> 00:03:11,346
Your friends
found me on Facebook
48
00:03:11,370 --> 00:03:12,582
and wanted me to organize
your bachelor party.
49
00:03:12,606 --> 00:03:13,749
Friends?
What friends?
50
00:03:13,773 --> 00:03:14,941
Damon...?
51
00:03:15,041 --> 00:03:16,285
Damon?
Damon's fucking annoying!
52
00:03:16,309 --> 00:03:18,411
Hey, I heard that!
What's up, Wall Man?
53
00:03:18,511 --> 00:03:21,480
Hang tight, buddy!
Lezzfuckinggo!
54
00:03:21,615 --> 00:03:22,749
Come on!
55
00:03:29,623 --> 00:03:30,323
Hey!
56
00:03:30,423 --> 00:03:32,859
What are you crazy kids up to?
57
00:03:32,959 --> 00:03:34,160
Hey!
58
00:03:34,260 --> 00:03:36,630
Go!
59
00:03:40,466 --> 00:03:43,502
These
plants are parched!
60
00:03:43,637 --> 00:03:47,674
You poor babies need some love.
61
00:03:47,774 --> 00:03:49,108
What the hell.
62
00:03:49,208 --> 00:03:51,711
You're coming home with Grandma.
63
00:03:52,345 --> 00:03:54,914
Grandma!
Can you say "Grandma"?
64
00:04:01,454 --> 00:04:04,657
Are you hungry? Okay.
65
00:04:04,658 --> 00:04:07,994
Just a little more
of my secret stuff...
66
00:04:09,428 --> 00:04:10,940
Hey, Grandma.
Crazy day at work today.
67
00:04:10,964 --> 00:04:12,642
This guy pressed his penis
against the display window
68
00:04:12,666 --> 00:04:15,568
and I rolled my friggin'
ankle Swiffering it.
69
00:04:15,669 --> 00:04:17,536
Is it...
70
00:04:19,806 --> 00:04:21,140
What... is it?
71
00:04:23,677 --> 00:04:26,012
Holy shit, Grandma!
This is weed!
72
00:04:26,112 --> 00:04:27,680
Really?
73
00:04:27,681 --> 00:04:29,182
Bad boy!
74
00:04:29,282 --> 00:04:30,717
It's moving past the veg phase.
75
00:04:30,817 --> 00:04:33,319
What is "veg"?
Like, like a salad?
76
00:04:33,419 --> 00:04:34,954
The weed buds are coming in.
77
00:04:37,390 --> 00:04:42,195
Hey! If you help me grow it...
78
00:04:42,295 --> 00:04:44,230
you wouldn't have
to buy it anymore.
79
00:04:44,330 --> 00:04:46,565
You wanna give me a hand?
80
00:04:46,700 --> 00:04:49,903
This could be a fun thing
we could do together.
81
00:04:50,003 --> 00:04:52,138
Yeah, I-I would love to.
82
00:04:52,238 --> 00:04:56,109
But the first thing we need
to do is get it to a dark place.
83
00:04:56,209 --> 00:04:59,445
You are fat and ugly.
That'll do it.
84
00:04:59,545 --> 00:05:00,847
No, that doesn't do it.
85
00:05:02,015 --> 00:05:03,783
Surprise!
86
00:05:04,984 --> 00:05:07,353
Welcome to your
bachelor party, bro!
87
00:05:07,453 --> 00:05:09,355
Look, I got all
the gym bros together
88
00:05:09,455 --> 00:05:11,124
thanks to this
little dude, of course.
89
00:05:11,224 --> 00:05:12,291
Thank you, little dude.
90
00:05:12,391 --> 00:05:13,626
Yo, check it out!
91
00:05:13,727 --> 00:05:16,495
We got a cigar station
and a fireworks station.
92
00:05:16,595 --> 00:05:19,833
And squishy-squashy...
A seafood tower!!!!
93
00:05:19,933 --> 00:05:22,401
Whoa, fellas!
94
00:05:22,501 --> 00:05:25,504
You didn't have to go
to all this trouble.
95
00:05:25,604 --> 00:05:28,207
I don't even know if I have
the energy for all this.
96
00:05:28,307 --> 00:05:30,309
Neither do we, dude.
I'm on Lipitor now.
97
00:05:30,409 --> 00:05:31,744
Hey, man, if we were
in our twenties,
98
00:05:31,745 --> 00:05:33,288
I would've taken you
right to the donkey show,
99
00:05:33,312 --> 00:05:34,447
you know that.
100
00:05:34,547 --> 00:05:35,815
But the world is fucked now,
101
00:05:35,915 --> 00:05:37,283
so we might as
well have an excuse
102
00:05:37,383 --> 00:05:39,018
to just kick back, right?
103
00:05:39,118 --> 00:05:42,121
Yeah, but I don't know. I...
104
00:05:42,221 --> 00:05:45,859
Kickin' back, yeah.
105
00:05:45,959 --> 00:05:48,261
I can go for that. Yeah!
106
00:05:52,398 --> 00:05:55,134
Lezzgobros weekend, all right!!
107
00:06:00,573 --> 00:06:02,308
So the LED lights
emulate a solstice.
108
00:06:02,408 --> 00:06:03,753
We're gonna go
12 hours with them on,
109
00:06:03,777 --> 00:06:04,887
and then 12 hours with them off.
110
00:06:04,911 --> 00:06:06,445
Did you know that
weed grows at night?
111
00:06:06,545 --> 00:06:08,347
Now what do we do?
112
00:06:08,447 --> 00:06:10,183
Now, we wait.
113
00:06:10,283 --> 00:06:12,151
If it goes well, do you
think we could sell it?
114
00:06:12,251 --> 00:06:14,653
We're gonna sell it
even if it doesn't go well!
115
00:06:14,788 --> 00:06:16,155
But who would buy it?
116
00:06:18,691 --> 00:06:21,327
I'd definitely buy this.
117
00:06:21,427 --> 00:06:23,662
- You wanna sniff a nub?
- Nug.
118
00:06:23,797 --> 00:06:24,864
- Nug.
- Nug.
119
00:06:24,964 --> 00:06:26,800
- Nug.
- Don't mind if I do.
120
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,702
Holy shit, this is fucking dank!
121
00:06:29,803 --> 00:06:31,883
I know at least seven dudes
who'd buy this right now.
122
00:06:31,971 --> 00:06:34,173
Then why don't you
sell it to them?
123
00:06:34,273 --> 00:06:35,708
I mean, sure, I'm down.
124
00:06:35,809 --> 00:06:39,112
Hey, maybe we can make enough
for you to buy your car!
125
00:06:39,212 --> 00:06:40,513
Now we're talking, Grandma.
126
00:06:40,613 --> 00:06:41,680
But with all the trimming,
127
00:06:41,815 --> 00:06:44,283
we're gonna need
some extra hands.
128
00:06:44,383 --> 00:06:46,585
More hands, you say?
129
00:06:51,457 --> 00:06:52,859
'Sup, bitches?
130
00:06:54,994 --> 00:06:58,497
You old people bored?
I'm running a business.
131
00:06:58,597 --> 00:07:02,501
Hey, Lesbian Biker Club over 60!
132
00:07:02,601 --> 00:07:04,370
Polish Senior Bread Club!
133
00:07:04,470 --> 00:07:05,939
You wanna join too?
134
00:07:06,039 --> 00:07:07,841
Let's get busy!
135
00:07:14,447 --> 00:07:15,681
All right.
136
00:07:15,849 --> 00:07:17,884
Johnathan and Mary Jo...
137
00:07:17,984 --> 00:07:19,962
Okay, I'm gonna have you guys
on labeling and packaging,
138
00:07:19,986 --> 00:07:22,455
putting stickers on
those cookie tin cans.
139
00:07:22,555 --> 00:07:25,691
We're calling it
Grandma's Jazz Cabbage.
140
00:07:25,859 --> 00:07:27,660
And Jonah and Claire? Hi.
141
00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:29,862
You guys are on extraction
duties in the kitchen,
142
00:07:29,863 --> 00:07:31,530
so go and fire up
that oil machine.
143
00:07:31,630 --> 00:07:36,602
And Doug and my sweet
Nora are our runners.
144
00:07:36,702 --> 00:07:37,770
Yes, Li-Wei?
145
00:07:37,871 --> 00:07:41,307
Are we selling drugs?
146
00:07:41,407 --> 00:07:43,142
Drugs...
147
00:07:44,710 --> 00:07:46,745
- Yes, Li-Wei.
- Just checking.
148
00:07:46,880 --> 00:07:48,181
Anything else?
149
00:07:48,281 --> 00:07:49,648
Can I sample the product?
150
00:07:49,748 --> 00:07:52,385
No, you cannot
sample the product.
151
00:07:52,485 --> 00:07:53,719
But I have glaucoma!
152
00:07:53,887 --> 00:07:55,454
All right, let's do this.
153
00:07:55,554 --> 00:07:58,257
We are officially in business!
154
00:08:04,898 --> 00:08:06,899
We have an order
for two half-zips!
155
00:08:06,900 --> 00:08:10,369
Six prerolls and the
special coconut oil!
156
00:08:15,474 --> 00:08:18,777
One half-zip tin ready to fly.
157
00:08:18,912 --> 00:08:21,747
32nd and Union!
You got it, bao bao?
158
00:08:21,915 --> 00:08:23,749
I got it, Grandma!
159
00:08:23,917 --> 00:08:25,118
How are the strap-ons?
160
00:09:09,963 --> 00:09:11,430
Hey, everyone.
161
00:09:11,530 --> 00:09:17,503
I called this meeting to say
we just sold our 100th ounce!
162
00:09:21,574 --> 00:09:22,808
Now, now, now,
163
00:09:22,976 --> 00:09:27,213
I normally don't do this, but...
164
00:09:27,313 --> 00:09:30,483
Li-Wei, do you want
to try a sample?
165
00:09:30,583 --> 00:09:33,352
Me? I... right here?
166
00:09:33,452 --> 00:09:35,288
Sure!
167
00:09:44,597 --> 00:09:45,864
This is not...
168
00:09:45,999 --> 00:09:48,601
Of course not!
That's oregano!
169
00:09:48,701 --> 00:09:51,704
I would never give free samples.
170
00:09:51,804 --> 00:09:53,639
What are you, stupid?
171
00:09:53,739 --> 00:09:55,674
Now get back to work!
172
00:09:55,774 --> 00:09:58,044
This ain't a TedX Talk!
173
00:10:05,751 --> 00:10:07,886
Wow, that risotto
was great, John-O.
174
00:10:07,987 --> 00:10:09,922
Hey, thanks, bro.
175
00:10:10,023 --> 00:10:11,700
I don't know why I ain't
talked to some of you guys
176
00:10:11,724 --> 00:10:13,368
in, like, five years,
but it was real nice of you
177
00:10:13,392 --> 00:10:14,860
to organize something for me.
178
00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:17,163
Yeah, it was our pleasure, bro.
179
00:10:17,263 --> 00:10:20,199
Well, Uncle Wally,
that's not all!
180
00:10:20,299 --> 00:10:22,468
Because I prepared
something else.
181
00:10:22,568 --> 00:10:28,541
Your love with Brenda is so
special and inspiring, so...
182
00:10:32,178 --> 00:10:33,579
- here she is!
- What?
183
00:10:34,947 --> 00:10:36,415
Hey, Wally!
184
00:10:36,515 --> 00:10:38,193
I know you're probably
all partied out right now,
185
00:10:38,217 --> 00:10:39,918
and you're having fun.
186
00:10:40,019 --> 00:10:42,888
But I just wanted to
say how excited I am
187
00:10:42,988 --> 00:10:45,091
to be spending
our lives together.
188
00:10:45,191 --> 00:10:48,161
A lifetime full of
trust and support,
189
00:10:48,261 --> 00:10:51,097
and through the
ups and the downs.
190
00:10:51,197 --> 00:10:54,100
You have my heart, Wally Bear.
You have my heart.
191
00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:55,568
I just love you.
192
00:10:55,668 --> 00:10:56,702
Damon, turn it off.
193
00:10:58,637 --> 00:11:01,107
Damon, turn it off, please!
194
00:11:02,908 --> 00:11:05,644
What's wrong, Uncle Wally?
195
00:11:06,345 --> 00:11:09,082
I don't know if there's gonna
be a wedding at this point.
196
00:11:09,182 --> 00:11:11,550
She realized she was
out of your league?
197
00:11:11,650 --> 00:11:13,952
I got fired from my job.
198
00:11:14,087 --> 00:11:16,855
And I've been
working at Sam Ash.
199
00:11:16,955 --> 00:11:18,991
I never told Brenda.
200
00:11:19,092 --> 00:11:21,127
Uncle Wally, Brenda loves you.
201
00:11:21,227 --> 00:11:22,895
She'll definitely understand.
202
00:11:22,995 --> 00:11:24,697
She'll understand
that I'm a loser?
203
00:11:24,797 --> 00:11:28,901
A liar, and I don't got
any future prospects?
204
00:11:29,001 --> 00:11:31,370
Look at me!
I changed careers.
205
00:11:31,470 --> 00:11:33,739
I used to be in tech,
and now I'm a B-list actor
206
00:11:33,839 --> 00:11:38,211
who sometimes gets free
vanilla ice cream at diners.
207
00:11:38,311 --> 00:11:41,614
I tried to tell her,
that I just got in too deep.
208
00:11:41,714 --> 00:11:43,692
All right, you know what's
gonna make you feel better?
209
00:11:43,716 --> 00:11:46,719
We get in the fuck bus,
and we go to your Sam Ash,
210
00:11:46,819 --> 00:11:49,155
and we each buy a guitar.
211
00:11:49,255 --> 00:11:50,965
That way, you get
a whole bunch of commission,
212
00:11:50,989 --> 00:11:53,159
and then we get to
noodle some baddies!
213
00:11:54,827 --> 00:11:56,162
It's about time!
214
00:11:56,262 --> 00:12:00,132
You call your...
Kia Sonata a "fuck bus"?
215
00:12:00,133 --> 00:12:02,601
Yes, sir. Yeah.
216
00:12:12,611 --> 00:12:15,047
Who the hell are
all these people?
217
00:12:19,252 --> 00:12:20,719
Grandma?
218
00:12:20,819 --> 00:12:22,888
You got people working
here all day now, or...
219
00:12:24,957 --> 00:12:28,994
Hidey-ho, Little Bo... Peep!
220
00:12:29,162 --> 00:12:30,429
Hidey-ho.
I'm just trying to
221
00:12:30,529 --> 00:12:31,849
talk to my grandma,
if you will...
222
00:12:31,897 --> 00:12:34,137
Yeah, well, maybe you're
barking up the wrong boot-holio.
223
00:12:34,167 --> 00:12:36,169
You catch my drift,
Taylor Swift?
224
00:12:36,269 --> 00:12:38,771
Um, I'm just catching
these weird bully rhymes.
225
00:12:38,871 --> 00:12:40,873
If you guys could maybe
just... thank you so much.
226
00:12:40,973 --> 00:12:43,008
Thank you, ladies.
227
00:12:43,742 --> 00:12:47,313
Nora!
I'm glad you're up early.
228
00:12:47,413 --> 00:12:50,649
You have an entire
ounce to sell today.
229
00:12:52,017 --> 00:12:55,954
Because you have an
entire facial tattoo on today.
230
00:12:56,054 --> 00:12:57,323
Are you all right?
231
00:12:57,423 --> 00:12:59,492
It's temporary...
232
00:12:59,592 --> 00:13:01,260
for now.
233
00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:05,531
But I'm gonna need you
to sell that ounce.
234
00:13:05,631 --> 00:13:07,200
Okay?
235
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:08,367
About that.
236
00:13:08,467 --> 00:13:10,436
I was maybe gonna
take the day off,
237
00:13:10,536 --> 00:13:12,805
just hang out with Doug.
238
00:13:12,905 --> 00:13:15,274
This is something
that we planned together.
239
00:13:15,374 --> 00:13:18,677
Would you betray your
grandmother like that?
240
00:13:18,777 --> 00:13:21,814
I don't think that doing
it tomorrow is betrayal.
241
00:13:21,914 --> 00:13:25,251
Nora...
242
00:13:25,351 --> 00:13:29,955
I'd really love it
if you did it today.
243
00:13:30,055 --> 00:13:31,957
We're business partners.
244
00:13:32,057 --> 00:13:37,563
You wouldn't want to do
bad business, would you?
245
00:13:37,663 --> 00:13:40,499
Why don't you shake
a little tail feather
246
00:13:40,599 --> 00:13:44,002
and get me my brick?
247
00:13:45,604 --> 00:13:47,806
Okay, bao bao?
248
00:13:55,648 --> 00:13:58,351
Man, it's crazy how
quick it makes people insane.
249
00:13:58,451 --> 00:14:00,719
Homegirl has gone full El Chapo.
250
00:14:00,819 --> 00:14:03,256
She's not far from
killing without guilt.
251
00:14:03,356 --> 00:14:06,091
God, I hope not!
252
00:14:06,259 --> 00:14:07,469
Well, I'mma take
off for the day.
253
00:14:07,493 --> 00:14:08,627
You're leaving me?
254
00:14:08,727 --> 00:14:10,896
Yeah, bro, I got
Spanish class in an hour!
255
00:14:10,996 --> 00:14:12,331
You got Spanish class?
256
00:14:12,431 --> 00:14:13,732
- S� se�or!
- Hey!
257
00:14:13,832 --> 00:14:17,303
You guys are the plug, right?
258
00:14:17,403 --> 00:14:18,504
You're Robert Heidel?
259
00:14:18,604 --> 00:14:19,981
I put a white dude's
name as my alias
260
00:14:20,005 --> 00:14:21,774
so no one would trace
it back to my IP.
261
00:14:21,874 --> 00:14:23,075
Smart.
262
00:14:23,175 --> 00:14:24,653
You guys just free balling
your identity out here?
263
00:14:24,677 --> 00:14:26,345
Not necessarily...
free balling.
264
00:14:26,445 --> 00:14:27,622
I have a different user name...
265
00:14:27,646 --> 00:14:29,315
Whatever, bro.
Just sell me the stuff.
266
00:14:29,415 --> 00:14:31,175
I'm not trying to wait
'til my 17th birthday.
267
00:14:33,118 --> 00:14:35,921
Okay, wait, no.
We cannot sell to this kid.
268
00:14:36,021 --> 00:14:37,390
Why not?
269
00:14:37,490 --> 00:14:39,392
First of all,
she's kind of a bitch.
270
00:14:39,492 --> 00:14:41,293
Number two,
she's not even 17 yet.
271
00:14:41,294 --> 00:14:42,928
And...
272
00:14:46,732 --> 00:14:48,100
She's kind of like a younger me.
273
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:51,203
A younger version of me
that hasn't been ruined by weed.
274
00:14:51,304 --> 00:14:52,538
Have you seen Euphoria?
275
00:14:52,638 --> 00:14:54,306
Weed is the least
of her problems.
276
00:14:54,307 --> 00:14:55,674
Me? What am I even doing?
277
00:14:55,774 --> 00:14:57,643
I'm selling weed
outside of my workplace!
278
00:14:57,743 --> 00:14:59,383
What are you? A DARE ad?
Just hurry it up!
279
00:14:59,478 --> 00:15:00,746
I've gotta get to SAT prep!
280
00:15:00,846 --> 00:15:02,348
She has SAT prep!
She's a bitch!
281
00:15:02,448 --> 00:15:04,493
Did they even have SATs
when y'all went to high school?
282
00:15:04,517 --> 00:15:06,218
'Cause you're giving
"I was born in 1985."
283
00:15:06,319 --> 00:15:08,754
- You little bitch.
- Excuse me!
284
00:15:08,854 --> 00:15:10,889
We're not that old.
We had SATs in high school.
285
00:15:10,989 --> 00:15:12,725
- Kumon.
- We also had the Kumon.
286
00:15:12,825 --> 00:15:14,593
We had the calculator.
287
00:15:14,693 --> 00:15:16,529
We got the TV's
that you wheel in.
288
00:15:16,629 --> 00:15:20,065
We had the And1 sweatsuits.
We had it all!
289
00:15:20,165 --> 00:15:21,166
You know what? No.
290
00:15:21,334 --> 00:15:23,669
I am not going to
compromise my morality,
291
00:15:23,769 --> 00:15:25,738
and I don't care
what you or my grandma...
292
00:15:25,838 --> 00:15:27,973
- Ooh! What...
- Loser!
293
00:15:28,073 --> 00:15:29,241
You little...
294
00:15:29,342 --> 00:15:30,776
You okay?
295
00:15:30,876 --> 00:15:33,379
My labia majora's
swelling in my throat!
296
00:15:33,479 --> 00:15:34,589
Kicked you right in the webbles.
297
00:15:34,613 --> 00:15:35,981
Bitch!
298
00:15:39,352 --> 00:15:41,354
Holy shit, Wall Man!
299
00:15:41,454 --> 00:15:43,589
This place is awesome!
300
00:15:43,689 --> 00:15:45,424
I can't believe you work here.
301
00:15:45,524 --> 00:15:47,359
And I get 15 percent off.
302
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:48,594
Only 15?
303
00:15:48,694 --> 00:15:49,774
Hey fellas, check this out.
304
00:15:49,862 --> 00:15:52,030
This Gibson just came in.
305
00:15:52,130 --> 00:15:53,265
Nice!
306
00:15:54,867 --> 00:15:58,604
This is the only other lady
I would give it all up for.
307
00:15:58,704 --> 00:16:01,373
Seriously, ain't she a beaut?
308
00:16:01,374 --> 00:16:03,108
So guitars are female to you?
309
00:16:03,208 --> 00:16:05,043
Yeah?
310
00:16:05,143 --> 00:16:06,278
Wally?
311
00:16:06,379 --> 00:16:07,680
Hey!
312
00:16:07,780 --> 00:16:09,081
What are you doing here?
313
00:16:09,181 --> 00:16:11,216
I thought you were
on your bachelor party.
314
00:16:11,384 --> 00:16:12,651
Well, we were.
315
00:16:12,751 --> 00:16:16,555
I just brought the fellas
in to look at guitars.
316
00:16:16,655 --> 00:16:18,090
Do you like that one?
317
00:16:18,190 --> 00:16:20,310
Because I was gonna get
you one for a wedding present,
318
00:16:20,393 --> 00:16:22,227
but look, I ruined the surprise.
319
00:16:25,864 --> 00:16:29,234
Hey, I need to
tell ya something.
320
00:16:29,402 --> 00:16:31,537
What is it?
321
00:16:31,637 --> 00:16:33,806
I work here.
322
00:16:33,906 --> 00:16:36,408
I've been working
here for two months.
323
00:16:36,409 --> 00:16:38,544
Since I got fired.
324
00:16:38,644 --> 00:16:41,313
Wally, you got fired?
325
00:16:41,414 --> 00:16:43,582
And you didn't tell me?
326
00:16:43,682 --> 00:16:45,851
I...
327
00:16:45,951 --> 00:16:48,521
I thought you might
judge me or something.
328
00:16:48,621 --> 00:16:50,288
Judge you?
329
00:16:50,423 --> 00:16:51,790
My son's a DJ.
330
00:16:51,890 --> 00:16:53,992
I make fucked-up
art for a living.
331
00:16:54,092 --> 00:16:56,128
Yeah, I should've told you.
I don't know what...
332
00:16:56,228 --> 00:16:58,108
I can't believe you
would think of me like that.
333
00:16:58,163 --> 00:16:59,698
No, I don't think
of you like that.
334
00:16:59,798 --> 00:17:02,568
You've been lying to
me for two months?
335
00:17:02,668 --> 00:17:05,170
No, just let me explain,
like, start from the beginning...
336
00:17:05,270 --> 00:17:06,539
No.
337
00:17:06,639 --> 00:17:08,206
I don't wanna talk right now.
338
00:17:09,542 --> 00:17:11,043
I really liked this.
339
00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:16,214
- Bren, come on.
- No.
340
00:17:18,116 --> 00:17:20,218
Hey, bros, how's it going?
341
00:17:20,318 --> 00:17:22,330
Do you have any questions?
Can I help you find anything?
342
00:17:23,589 --> 00:17:26,024
Wally, I didn't realize
you were working today.
343
00:17:26,124 --> 00:17:28,260
I'm not working today, Patrick.
344
00:17:28,360 --> 00:17:31,263
Take a swig.
345
00:17:31,363 --> 00:17:32,464
It's just milk.
346
00:17:32,465 --> 00:17:34,467
Brown bagging it with your milk?
347
00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:39,337
You know what?
I can't do this anymore.
348
00:17:39,472 --> 00:17:40,706
I have to say something.
349
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:48,714
Yeah, nope!
350
00:17:48,814 --> 00:17:50,516
What the fuck?
351
00:17:51,650 --> 00:17:52,818
What...
352
00:17:52,918 --> 00:17:54,152
What's going on here?
353
00:17:54,252 --> 00:17:56,922
These jerks say
I stole their plants.
354
00:17:57,022 --> 00:17:58,524
You did steal their plants.
355
00:17:58,624 --> 00:18:00,659
See? I told you.
356
00:18:00,759 --> 00:18:02,194
Who are you guys?
357
00:18:02,294 --> 00:18:04,663
Hi, I'm Xavier, and
this is Jaxon, both with an X.
358
00:18:04,763 --> 00:18:06,131
What are you doing here?
359
00:18:06,231 --> 00:18:08,311
We moved here
after we graduated Bard in '07,
360
00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:10,368
and we had a little
arts collective in Bushwick.
361
00:18:10,503 --> 00:18:12,137
And we started
this zine monthly,
362
00:18:12,237 --> 00:18:13,505
where we featured
a ton of cool artists.
363
00:18:13,506 --> 00:18:14,773
Okay...
364
00:18:14,873 --> 00:18:16,384
Enough, Xavier,
you suck at storytelling.
365
00:18:16,408 --> 00:18:18,911
Look, lady, we just want to get
our mother plants back, okay?
366
00:18:19,011 --> 00:18:22,080
We took a long time creating
this crossbreed, hybrid,
367
00:18:22,180 --> 00:18:25,117
and a little birdie told us
about Grandma's Jazz Cabbage,
368
00:18:25,217 --> 00:18:26,752
so we tracked your
sales to here.
369
00:18:26,852 --> 00:18:30,923
Who snitched? Aah!
370
00:18:33,191 --> 00:18:35,528
Li-Wei! Why, I oughta...
371
00:18:35,628 --> 00:18:36,695
Whoa, whoa, whoa...
372
00:18:36,795 --> 00:18:38,130
Grandma, what has
gotten into you?
373
00:18:38,230 --> 00:18:40,566
Seriously!
You've gone mad.
374
00:18:40,666 --> 00:18:41,767
We're mad too!
375
00:18:41,867 --> 00:18:43,277
We don't wanna go
back to the zine biz!
376
00:18:46,572 --> 00:18:50,676
I don't wanna go back
to feeling useless.
377
00:18:50,776 --> 00:18:52,878
Grandma...
378
00:18:54,112 --> 00:18:55,347
You're not useless.
379
00:18:55,447 --> 00:18:59,618
Look, you built a
crazy, illegal...
380
00:18:59,718 --> 00:19:05,057
really systematically
fucked-up drug empire.
381
00:19:05,157 --> 00:19:06,458
You look so cute,
382
00:19:06,559 --> 00:19:09,261
like a little criminal
snow leopard or something.
383
00:19:09,361 --> 00:19:11,263
- And your tattoo looks great.
- Thank you.
384
00:19:11,363 --> 00:19:12,403
You're not useless.
385
00:19:12,565 --> 00:19:14,032
Gonna "yes, and"
that and just say
386
00:19:14,132 --> 00:19:16,168
that we couldn't have
gotten them this big before.
387
00:19:16,268 --> 00:19:18,170
Yeah, but we still
want the plants back.
388
00:19:18,270 --> 00:19:20,573
Okay, okay, okay.
How about this?
389
00:19:20,673 --> 00:19:22,083
We'll give you...
We'll give you the plants.
390
00:19:22,107 --> 00:19:23,384
We'll give you the
secret ingredient.
391
00:19:23,408 --> 00:19:25,143
But you have to let us
keep the money,
392
00:19:25,243 --> 00:19:27,012
and we never see you guys again.
393
00:19:27,112 --> 00:19:28,480
Side chat.
394
00:19:30,148 --> 00:19:31,249
Sounds good to us!
395
00:19:31,349 --> 00:19:33,485
All you guys said
was "sss" to each other.
396
00:19:33,586 --> 00:19:36,121
Sounds good to me.
397
00:19:36,221 --> 00:19:38,590
And here's our
secret ingredient.
398
00:19:38,591 --> 00:19:39,725
What is it?
399
00:19:39,825 --> 00:19:42,995
Some ancient, mystical
Chinese herbal powder?
400
00:19:43,095 --> 00:19:46,131
It's from CVS, you racist hobo.
401
00:19:46,231 --> 00:19:47,332
Yeah, that's racist.
402
00:19:47,432 --> 00:19:49,835
Now get out of my
house, all of you!
403
00:19:49,935 --> 00:19:52,137
- Get out of here!
- Okay!
404
00:19:52,237 --> 00:19:54,740
Get the
hell out of here!
405
00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:56,609
Li-Wei, especially you!
406
00:19:56,709 --> 00:19:58,711
- Bye, Li-Wei.
- Yeah.
407
00:19:59,645 --> 00:20:01,346
Nice, Grandma.
408
00:20:01,446 --> 00:20:03,148
You're wearing damn
shoes in the house.
409
00:20:03,248 --> 00:20:05,283
You're wearing damn
shoes in the house!
410
00:20:05,383 --> 00:20:06,952
You got little
high-heeled booties on,
411
00:20:07,052 --> 00:20:08,987
click-clacking like
Big Bird out here.
412
00:20:09,087 --> 00:20:10,488
Yeah, it's cute?
413
00:20:10,589 --> 00:20:12,290
Yeah, it's cute.
Your whole outfit is cute.
414
00:20:12,390 --> 00:20:13,735
Yeah, well, take off
your goddamn shoes.
415
00:20:13,759 --> 00:20:15,493
Okay, okay, okay.
416
00:20:15,594 --> 00:20:17,138
Okay, are you gonna take
off your shoes, though?
417
00:20:17,162 --> 00:20:18,673
- Yeah, later.
- Okay.
418
00:20:18,697 --> 00:20:19,598
I can tap dance.
419
00:20:23,435 --> 00:20:25,971
- Hey, bao bao!
- Hey.
420
00:20:26,071 --> 00:20:28,106
I got something for you.
421
00:20:28,206 --> 00:20:30,643
Holy fucking shit, Grandma!
422
00:20:30,743 --> 00:20:34,346
You think this is enough to
buy that car you wanna fuck?
423
00:20:34,446 --> 00:20:36,314
Mandy?
424
00:20:36,414 --> 00:20:37,792
Man, I can't
take all that, though.
425
00:20:37,816 --> 00:20:40,753
Well, let's just say
it's my way of an apology
426
00:20:40,853 --> 00:20:43,756
for making you chop up a brick.
427
00:20:43,856 --> 00:20:46,058
Thanks, Grandma.
428
00:20:46,158 --> 00:20:48,293
And I also just wanna say, um...
429
00:20:48,393 --> 00:20:49,628
I'm really proud of you.
430
00:20:49,728 --> 00:20:51,296
Yeah, I know.
431
00:20:53,031 --> 00:20:56,568
- So, should we?
- Hell yeah!
432
00:21:29,768 --> 00:21:31,703
Who the
is Awkwafina?
433
00:21:31,753 --> 00:21:36,303
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