Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:08.740 --> 00:00:09.573
Hey, come on.
2
00:00:09.576 --> 00:00:11.653
Yeah, come on. Yeah. Yeah.
3
00:00:11.655 --> 00:00:13.689
Gonna have to circle back to that.
4
00:00:16.424 --> 00:00:17.726
Come here, Pepper.
5
00:00:17.728 --> 00:00:18.894
Come eat your, uh...
6
00:00:20.765 --> 00:00:21.964
Fire!
7
00:00:21.966 --> 00:00:24.242
Wake up! Fire!
8
00:00:24.245 --> 00:00:25.467
Really? Nothing?
9
00:00:26.604 --> 00:00:28.820
"When Clowns Fall Down" is on TV!
10
00:00:28.823 --> 00:00:31.472
Oh, "Clowns" is on! Oh! There's a fire!
11
00:00:31.475 --> 00:00:34.760
Ray, DVR the clowns, and
let's get out of here!
12
00:00:34.790 --> 00:00:35.577
Dylan, out! Dad, take this!
13
00:00:35.579 --> 00:00:37.613
- Ray?
- Wow, what's gotten into him?
14
00:00:37.615 --> 00:00:38.981
I suppose you don't really know
15
00:00:38.983 --> 00:00:40.520
how you're gonna react to an emergency
16
00:00:40.523 --> 00:00:41.555
until you're in one.
17
00:00:41.558 --> 00:00:42.590
You know what I mean?
18
00:00:42.593 --> 00:00:45.220
I wonder how I'd react in an emergency.
19
00:00:45.222 --> 00:00:47.523
- This is one! Get out!
- Yes, sir!
20
00:00:47.525 --> 00:00:49.412
Oh, I'm a follower.
21
00:00:49.415 --> 00:00:51.115
Now!
22
00:00:51.118 --> 00:00:55.129
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
23
00:00:55.132 --> 00:00:58.534
Well, we found our culprit...
These cheap, old lights.
24
00:00:58.536 --> 00:00:59.618
They're brand-new.
25
00:01:00.604 --> 00:01:03.272
To us. I don't know...
26
00:01:03.274 --> 00:01:06.710
when the raccoon I fought
for them purchased them.
27
00:01:06.740 --> 00:01:08.430
Please don't judge us.
Money's been really tight.
28
00:01:08.450 --> 00:01:09.411
We've had to buy our house,
29
00:01:09.413 --> 00:01:11.380
pay for hospital
bills, so you know what?
30
00:01:11.382 --> 00:01:13.215
We could really do
without the light-shaming.
31
00:01:13.217 --> 00:01:15.317
That's much longer than
it usually takes her
32
00:01:15.319 --> 00:01:17.186
to go on the offensive. That's respect.
33
00:01:17.188 --> 00:01:19.810
Well, I'm sorry you
lost all your presents.
34
00:01:19.813 --> 00:01:21.390
Don't worry.
35
00:01:21.392 --> 00:01:23.892
No, those are fake presents
until we could afford real ones.
36
00:01:23.894 --> 00:01:27.620
They were just boxes full
of newspaper and sawdust.
37
00:01:27.640 --> 00:01:28.730
Or, in your parlance, fuel.
38
00:01:28.732 --> 00:01:30.966
You don't talk to our insurance, do you?
39
00:01:30.968 --> 00:01:34.269
DiMeooooos!
40
00:01:34.271 --> 00:01:36.710
Oh, thank God.
41
00:01:36.730 --> 00:01:37.469
Were you out clubbing?
42
00:01:37.472 --> 00:01:39.341
And does that look really work for you?
43
00:01:39.343 --> 00:01:42.657
Hey, last week, I
convinced three sturdy...
44
00:01:44.381 --> 00:01:45.414
Not the time.
45
00:01:47.141 --> 00:01:48.851
Mom, Dad, our presents.
46
00:01:48.853 --> 00:01:51.153
No child should have
to bury her presents.
47
00:01:51.155 --> 00:01:53.589
Aww, don't worry, Dylan. I can...
48
00:01:53.591 --> 00:01:55.576
You can what?! What can you do, Kenneth?
49
00:01:55.579 --> 00:01:56.758
Please, tell me.
50
00:01:56.761 --> 00:01:58.941
You can bring back my
presents? Is that what you do?!
51
00:01:59.930 --> 00:02:03.650
Look, I'm sorry. It's
been a very hectic night.
52
00:02:03.670 --> 00:02:05.968
I was gonna say I can
bring you my presents.
53
00:02:05.970 --> 00:02:07.269
I don't want to overhype,
54
00:02:07.271 --> 00:02:10.105
but I gave a pretty penny to
the estate of Steve Jobs...
55
00:02:10.107 --> 00:02:11.440
Whoa!
56
00:02:11.442 --> 00:02:13.639
Okay, okay, all right. Well,
I don't want to be a one-upper,
57
00:02:13.641 --> 00:02:16.111
but our presents were... one better.
58
00:02:17.848 --> 00:02:19.470
VR headsets for Ray
59
00:02:19.490 --> 00:02:22.117
and movie-editing software for JJ,
60
00:02:22.119 --> 00:02:24.190
and a My Little Pony...
61
00:02:24.210 --> 00:02:25.537
for Jimmy.
62
00:02:25.540 --> 00:02:27.389
And a...
63
00:02:27.391 --> 00:02:29.491
dirt bike for Dylan!
64
00:02:29.493 --> 00:02:32.828
Wow, Mom. They're gone, but
you sure take care of us.
65
00:02:32.830 --> 00:02:35.831
I know I do, I do, I do, I do, I do.
66
00:02:35.833 --> 00:02:38.133
Say, Maya, d-did you happen to get me
67
00:02:38.135 --> 00:02:39.201
that book I wanted
68
00:02:39.203 --> 00:02:41.503
called "This is Questionable Behavior"?
69
00:02:41.505 --> 00:02:45.730
I didn't, but I did get one
called "A Victimless Crime."
70
00:02:45.750 --> 00:02:47.743
Is it by the same guy who
wrote "But To What End"?
71
00:02:47.745 --> 00:02:49.811
No, it's by the woman who wrote
72
00:02:49.813 --> 00:02:52.147
"What They Don't Know, Won't Hurt Them."
73
00:02:52.149 --> 00:02:53.682
Wow, I read a lot of books,
74
00:02:53.684 --> 00:02:55.920
but I've never heard of any of these.
75
00:02:55.940 --> 00:02:56.427
Yeah, I know 'em.
76
00:02:57.120 --> 00:03:01.522
Excuse me, I was told you're
the hero who saved the family.
77
00:03:01.525 --> 00:03:03.158
Oh, uh...
78
00:03:03.160 --> 00:03:05.294
Wow, I-I guess I am a hero.
79
00:03:05.296 --> 00:03:08.130
Uh, I mean, I've been
heroic a few other times,
80
00:03:08.132 --> 00:03:09.364
but only in dreams.
81
00:03:09.366 --> 00:03:10.899
One time, I stopped a group of guys
82
00:03:10.901 --> 00:03:12.801
from robbing a bank
full of girls I like.
83
00:03:12.803 --> 00:03:14.269
"Exhausting."
84
00:03:14.271 --> 00:03:15.537
I know.
85
00:03:15.539 --> 00:03:17.406
Eh, still gotta do my walk-behind.
86
00:03:17.408 --> 00:03:19.740
I just got up 'cause
I heard the dog bark.
87
00:03:19.760 --> 00:03:21.643
But I suppose if a
boy wakes up his family
88
00:03:21.645 --> 00:03:23.912
and gets everybody out
safely, he's a hero.
89
00:03:23.914 --> 00:03:25.141
Baba-booey!
90
00:03:25.144 --> 00:03:26.247
Go, Sox!
91
00:03:26.250 --> 00:03:27.388
I'm sorry about her.
92
00:03:31.188 --> 00:03:32.588
What is this?
93
00:03:32.590 --> 00:03:34.823
A-A surprise for me?
94
00:03:34.825 --> 00:03:37.459
"Merry Christmas to my Big Buddy."
95
00:03:37.461 --> 00:03:38.894
Isn't this exciting?
96
00:03:38.896 --> 00:03:41.830
JJ told me you want to
coach, and we have an opening.
97
00:03:41.832 --> 00:03:44.466
Coach Cox took a leave
of absence for some...
98
00:03:44.468 --> 00:03:45.667
troubling reasons...
99
00:03:45.669 --> 00:03:46.535
Oh.
100
00:03:46.537 --> 00:03:47.803
Writing a novel.
101
00:03:47.805 --> 00:03:49.338
Oh, okay.
102
00:03:49.340 --> 00:03:51.390
I can't believe I'm gonna coach!
103
00:03:52.402 --> 00:03:54.843
Your girls' basketball team.
104
00:03:54.845 --> 00:03:56.780
Hard pass!
105
00:03:56.800 --> 00:03:57.512
Oh, you heard him, girls!
106
00:03:57.514 --> 00:03:59.470
Harder passes!
107
00:03:59.490 --> 00:04:00.315
Ow!
108
00:04:00.317 --> 00:04:04.519
No, I'm passing. I can't
coach girls' basketball.
109
00:04:04.521 --> 00:04:06.888
What's wrong? You're not sexist...?
110
00:04:09.560 --> 00:04:11.226
Yup.
111
00:04:11.228 --> 00:04:13.219
I'm a sexist.
112
00:04:13.222 --> 00:04:14.863
I'm a big, ol' sexist.
113
00:04:14.865 --> 00:04:16.965
And there will be no more talk of this.
114
00:04:16.967 --> 00:04:19.329
The man has s-spoken.
115
00:04:21.604 --> 00:04:24.800
Okay, fine, I'm no sexist.
116
00:04:24.110 --> 00:04:26.341
I just have a very
complicated relationship
117
00:04:26.343 --> 00:04:28.760
with girls' basketball.
118
00:04:28.780 --> 00:04:29.368
Okay, dude.
119
00:04:29.371 --> 00:04:33.882
Watch what happens when I Google
"Kenneth Clements basketball."
120
00:04:33.884 --> 00:04:35.784
Yeah, did you mean "Kendall Clements"?
121
00:04:35.786 --> 00:04:36.938
That's my sister.
122
00:04:36.941 --> 00:04:39.820
I was good at basketball,
but she was great.
123
00:04:39.823 --> 00:04:41.923
And she and my other sister, Kiki,
124
00:04:41.925 --> 00:04:44.840
just loved rubbing my nose in it.
125
00:04:44.870 --> 00:04:46.428
If I scored 20, Kendall would score 40.
126
00:04:46.430 --> 00:04:47.963
If I scored 50...
127
00:04:47.965 --> 00:04:50.165
Okay, I never scored
50. What's that look?
128
00:04:50.167 --> 00:04:52.901
Are you a long-lost third witch
sister I don't know about?!
129
00:04:55.839 --> 00:04:58.340
I wanna coach, but girls' basketball,
130
00:04:58.342 --> 00:05:00.676
that's Kendall's world.
131
00:05:00.678 --> 00:05:02.678
I just can't go there.
132
00:05:05.582 --> 00:05:07.673
Okay, I think our story's coming up.
133
00:05:07.676 --> 00:05:09.351
This is going to be huge for me.
134
00:05:09.353 --> 00:05:12.688
Thanks, Grant. Sounds like
those elephants had a Hanukkah
135
00:05:12.690 --> 00:05:14.157
they'll never forget.
136
00:05:14.160 --> 00:05:15.891
And now, a story about a family
137
00:05:15.893 --> 00:05:20.629
that narrowly avoided having
a nightmare before Christmas.
138
00:05:20.631 --> 00:05:22.364
Picture a hero. In your mind,
139
00:05:22.366 --> 00:05:24.433
he's probably not a little guy, is he?
140
00:05:24.435 --> 00:05:28.136
And he probably doesn't
have wild, unkempt hair
141
00:05:28.138 --> 00:05:29.971
or drink out of the toilet.
142
00:05:29.973 --> 00:05:31.139
What? One time!
143
00:05:31.141 --> 00:05:33.342
Dylan put ghost pepper in my toothpaste.
144
00:05:33.344 --> 00:05:36.878
But last night, the DiMeo
family spelled "hero"
145
00:05:36.880 --> 00:05:38.313
"D-O-G."
146
00:05:38.315 --> 00:05:40.282
Dog hero? What a fun angle.
147
00:05:40.284 --> 00:05:41.478
Is the news always this good?
148
00:05:41.481 --> 00:05:42.880
But that's not what happened.
149
00:05:42.883 --> 00:05:44.119
Don't believe me?
150
00:05:44.121 --> 00:05:47.889
Listen to what this boy had
to say about little Pepper.
151
00:05:47.891 --> 00:05:49.157
He's a hero.
152
00:05:49.159 --> 00:05:50.692
Dolph?!
153
00:05:54.379 --> 00:05:55.931
No, I am a hero!
154
00:05:55.933 --> 00:05:57.146
I saved you guys!
155
00:05:57.149 --> 00:05:59.468
Ray, it doesn't matter.
156
00:05:59.470 --> 00:06:02.170
Seriously, look, who cares
what they say about...
157
00:06:02.172 --> 00:06:03.572
Shut up, I'm on TV!
158
00:06:03.574 --> 00:06:05.821
It stinks because our
parents worked so hard
159
00:06:05.824 --> 00:06:07.242
to get us all these great presents
160
00:06:07.244 --> 00:06:08.610
even though money's been tight.
161
00:06:08.612 --> 00:06:10.594
VR headsets, dirt bikes,
162
00:06:10.597 --> 00:06:12.981
my brother's "Harry Potter"
fan fiction in hardback,
163
00:06:12.983 --> 00:06:14.549
one of those robot vacuums.
164
00:06:14.551 --> 00:06:16.918
Hey, my lie is famous.
165
00:06:20.758 --> 00:06:23.158
Hey, Dolph, you missed a spot.
166
00:06:23.160 --> 00:06:25.594
Okay, Dylan. You can
mock me all you want,
167
00:06:25.596 --> 00:06:28.230
but I've decided not to let Pepper
getting all the credit bug me.
168
00:06:28.232 --> 00:06:30.232
I'm not gonna get jealous of a dog.
169
00:06:30.234 --> 00:06:31.833
I have to rise above it.
170
00:06:31.835 --> 00:06:33.902
It's either that or I
let it drive me insane.
171
00:06:33.904 --> 00:06:36.938
Ooh, that sounds more
fun. Let's do that.
172
00:06:38.409 --> 00:06:40.750
Yay! Pizza's here!
173
00:06:41.378 --> 00:06:43.912
Mrs. DiMeo? Hi, I'm Candy Kensington.
174
00:06:43.914 --> 00:06:45.313
I'm from the Newport Beach chapter
175
00:06:45.315 --> 00:06:47.349
of the charity Santa's Purpose.
176
00:06:47.351 --> 00:06:48.884
We're doing our Jinglethon fundraiser
177
00:06:48.886 --> 00:06:50.152
at Lafayette this week.
178
00:06:50.154 --> 00:06:52.854
Why not "Santa's Cause"?
179
00:06:52.856 --> 00:06:55.230
Oh, wow, yeah, um...
180
00:06:55.250 --> 00:06:56.282
That's much snappier.
181
00:06:57.294 --> 00:06:59.940
Anyhoo, um, may I?
182
00:06:59.960 --> 00:07:01.463
So, part of our mission is, uh,
183
00:07:01.465 --> 00:07:04.633
bringing the joy of Christmas
to less fortunate families.
184
00:07:04.635 --> 00:07:06.435
Oh, no, no, we're not
in need of charity.
185
00:07:06.437 --> 00:07:07.881
- We thought you were food!
- I'm starving!
186
00:07:07.883 --> 00:07:09.438
Oh, shush!
187
00:07:09.440 --> 00:07:11.373
Well, we heard your family's story,
188
00:07:11.375 --> 00:07:12.674
and we were just heartbroken.
189
00:07:12.676 --> 00:07:15.811
So we've decided to
replace all of your gifts!
190
00:07:15.813 --> 00:07:17.780
- What?
- No way! Okay, bring them in!
191
00:07:17.800 --> 00:07:18.547
Whoa!
192
00:07:18.549 --> 00:07:20.449
- Is that a dirt bike?
- Right over there.
193
00:07:20.451 --> 00:07:24.337
Oh, my gosh, VR goggles! This
is the best Christmas ever!
194
00:07:24.340 --> 00:07:26.235
Mom! Can I ride this in the house?
195
00:07:26.238 --> 00:07:27.222
Uhh...
196
00:07:27.224 --> 00:07:28.356
Ooh!
197
00:07:28.358 --> 00:07:31.260
Oh, my God, Jimmy. What have I done?
198
00:07:31.280 --> 00:07:33.962
You defrauded a charity at Christmas.
199
00:07:33.964 --> 00:07:35.501
Well...
200
00:07:35.504 --> 00:07:37.415
anything can sound bad if you say it.
201
00:07:39.515 --> 00:07:43.295
- Whooo!
- Whoa!
202
00:07:43.298 --> 00:07:44.622
Okay, yeah!
203
00:07:44.625 --> 00:07:45.590
Bad bird!
204
00:07:45.592 --> 00:07:47.592
- Oh, look out for that panther!
- Ah!
205
00:07:47.594 --> 00:07:50.412
Ohh, Jimmy, I feel so awful.
206
00:07:50.415 --> 00:07:51.630
Why did I lie?
207
00:07:51.632 --> 00:07:53.550
We've got to give these gifts back.
208
00:07:53.553 --> 00:07:54.966
Oh, do we?
209
00:07:54.968 --> 00:07:56.101
Think of the kids.
210
00:07:56.103 --> 00:07:57.202
Darling, no matter what,
211
00:07:57.204 --> 00:07:59.471
the kids cannot find out what happened.
212
00:07:59.473 --> 00:08:00.772
You lied to us?
213
00:08:01.907 --> 00:08:03.574
We're losing our presents?
214
00:08:04.645 --> 00:08:06.545
You know...
215
00:08:06.547 --> 00:08:08.881
you should really try these
while we still have them.
216
00:08:10.216 --> 00:08:12.616
JJ, I'm all for surprises,
217
00:08:12.619 --> 00:08:15.870
but if I'm blindfolded,
it's hard for us to talk.
218
00:08:15.890 --> 00:08:17.456
It's no problem, man.
I can talk for him.
219
00:08:17.458 --> 00:08:19.570
Anything to get those five stars.
220
00:08:19.590 --> 00:08:19.958
What do you want me to read, baby?
221
00:08:19.960 --> 00:08:20.992
No, man!
222
00:08:20.994 --> 00:08:22.260
Watch the road!
223
00:08:22.262 --> 00:08:23.373
Can we just sit in silence?
224
00:08:23.376 --> 00:08:24.796
Whatever you say, boss, all right?
225
00:08:24.798 --> 00:08:26.498
Anything to get those five stars, baby.
226
00:08:27.397 --> 00:08:28.734
We are here.
227
00:08:30.404 --> 00:08:32.558
It's The Cheesecake Factory, isn't it?
228
00:08:32.561 --> 00:08:35.107
Oh, you know how I love cheesecake.
229
00:08:35.109 --> 00:08:37.750
Hi, Kenneth!
230
00:08:37.770 --> 00:08:38.412
Wha...
231
00:08:38.415 --> 00:08:41.446
This Cheesecake Factory sounds
a lot like my terrible sisters!
232
00:08:41.448 --> 00:08:43.170
Yo, DiMeo. Is it true?
233
00:08:43.173 --> 00:08:45.150
Did your dog carry JJ
to safety with his teeth?
234
00:08:45.152 --> 00:08:46.365
No, of course...
235
00:08:47.388 --> 00:08:48.795
You know what?
236
00:08:48.798 --> 00:08:50.122
Yes. Yes, he did.
237
00:08:50.124 --> 00:08:51.556
Pepper is a great dog.
238
00:08:51.558 --> 00:08:53.759
My family is safe.
That's what's important.
239
00:08:53.761 --> 00:08:56.610
Hey, Blake, what would you do
240
00:08:56.630 --> 00:08:58.997
if I told you the real
hero is actually here...
241
00:08:58.999 --> 00:09:01.266
...right now?
242
00:09:01.268 --> 00:09:02.381
Come here, Pepper!
243
00:09:03.971 --> 00:09:05.370
Oh, my gosh!
244
00:09:09.309 --> 00:09:11.977
It is so nice to meet you, JJ.
245
00:09:11.979 --> 00:09:13.269
And, Kenneth, you looking good.
246
00:09:13.272 --> 00:09:15.847
What did you do, fall
in the Fountain of Youth?
247
00:09:15.849 --> 00:09:17.886
Oh, you're so sweet, Kiki.
248
00:09:17.889 --> 00:09:20.218
Anybody want cookies?
Fresh from the oven.
249
00:09:20.220 --> 00:09:23.210
Sure. Sounds great!
250
00:09:23.230 --> 00:09:25.257
I hope you get stuck in the oven.
251
00:09:25.259 --> 00:09:26.553
What are we doing here?
252
00:09:26.556 --> 00:09:29.961
"Make your peace with them so
you can coach like you want.
253
00:09:29.963 --> 00:09:31.997
They seem lovely."
254
00:09:31.999 --> 00:09:33.698
Oh, lovely, huh?
255
00:09:33.700 --> 00:09:35.133
Watch.
256
00:09:35.135 --> 00:09:37.969
Ladies, I have some exciting news.
257
00:09:37.971 --> 00:09:40.839
I was offered the, uh, job
258
00:09:40.841 --> 00:09:43.775
of girls' basketball coach.
259
00:09:50.551 --> 00:09:51.683
Basketball?
260
00:09:51.685 --> 00:09:54.319
You don't even know
anything about basketball!
261
00:09:54.321 --> 00:09:57.722
I played at a high level
in high school and college!
262
00:09:57.724 --> 00:10:00.158
All right, Broken Stereo.
263
00:10:00.160 --> 00:10:02.270
"Why do they call you 'Broken St... '"
264
00:10:02.290 --> 00:10:04.331
Dude, don't set them up like that, man!
265
00:10:04.334 --> 00:10:07.186
Because he can't play.
266
00:10:07.189 --> 00:10:10.268
Because he sucks at basketball!
267
00:10:10.270 --> 00:10:12.704
Kendall, I-I said "broken"
268
00:10:12.706 --> 00:10:15.123
because when the radio
don't play, he can't...
269
00:10:15.126 --> 00:10:16.334
Y-You don't get it?
270
00:10:16.337 --> 00:10:17.742
You know what? Never mind. He sucks!
271
00:10:17.744 --> 00:10:18.894
- High five, up top!
- Yeah!
272
00:10:18.897 --> 00:10:20.764
You see, JJ?
273
00:10:46.773 --> 00:10:49.708
Hello, darlings. Did
you have a wonderful day?
274
00:10:49.710 --> 00:10:51.676
Great, sad it's done.
275
00:10:52.646 --> 00:10:54.746
Well, do I have good news for you.
276
00:10:54.748 --> 00:10:56.615
We're volunteering at the Jinglethon.
277
00:10:56.617 --> 00:10:57.716
What? Why?
278
00:10:57.718 --> 00:10:59.117
Do you want to give the presents back?
279
00:10:59.119 --> 00:11:02.153
You keep the presents' name
out of your filthy mouth!
280
00:11:02.155 --> 00:11:05.891
Well, we can't pay for them,
so we're donating our time.
281
00:11:05.893 --> 00:11:09.361
After all, time is
money, except we have it.
282
00:11:09.363 --> 00:11:10.959
Kenneth the coach.
283
00:11:10.962 --> 00:11:13.665
What you gonna teach them
how to do, Kenneth? Lose?
284
00:11:13.667 --> 00:11:16.355
Yeah, like, how to get beat?
285
00:11:16.358 --> 00:11:18.870
Kendall, it's the same thing!
286
00:11:18.872 --> 00:11:20.238
They're synonyms!
287
00:11:20.240 --> 00:11:21.973
I didn't even want to come here.
288
00:11:21.975 --> 00:11:23.608
Is there nothing else we can talk about?
289
00:11:23.610 --> 00:11:25.510
Actually, um...
290
00:11:25.512 --> 00:11:30.916
Yeah, there is something
I need to tell you.
291
00:11:30.918 --> 00:11:32.651
I went to the doctor last week...
292
00:11:32.653 --> 00:11:33.485
Yeah?
293
00:11:33.487 --> 00:11:35.872
He saw something on my X-ray,
294
00:11:35.875 --> 00:11:38.576
and it was bad. It was really bad.
295
00:11:38.579 --> 00:11:39.639
What was it?
296
00:11:40.694 --> 00:11:43.428
Your jumpshot, sucka!
297
00:11:47.234 --> 00:11:50.635
I'm-live for a long time,
you Good Halloween House.
298
00:11:50.637 --> 00:11:51.903
"Why do you call him 'Good'..."
299
00:11:51.905 --> 00:11:53.605
What did I say about teeing them up?
300
00:11:53.607 --> 00:11:56.641
'Cause he got big ol' butterfingers!
301
00:11:56.643 --> 00:11:58.643
You don't even play, Kiki!
302
00:11:58.645 --> 00:12:00.450
Kendall's the good one!
303
00:12:00.470 --> 00:12:01.146
Stop dancing!
304
00:12:01.148 --> 00:12:03.715
And I'm not bad at basketball.
305
00:12:03.717 --> 00:12:05.830
Rejected!
306
00:12:05.850 --> 00:12:06.418
In your face!
307
00:12:06.420 --> 00:12:08.587
That's it! We're settling
this on the court.
308
00:12:08.589 --> 00:12:11.220
If I win, you two shut up forever.
309
00:12:11.240 --> 00:12:13.979
If you score once, we'll shut up.
310
00:12:13.982 --> 00:12:15.237
Deal.
311
00:12:15.319 --> 00:12:17.162
Deal.
312
00:12:17.164 --> 00:12:19.798
Deal, British Airways.
313
00:12:19.800 --> 00:12:21.201
"Why do they call..."
314
00:12:21.204 --> 00:12:22.795
Dude, stop!
315
00:12:25.445 --> 00:12:28.885
Right, we are here
for one reason only...
316
00:12:28.888 --> 00:12:30.955
To work off the presents we took.
317
00:12:30.957 --> 00:12:33.124
Right? We will not take anything.
318
00:12:34.157 --> 00:12:35.223
I brought that.
319
00:12:35.226 --> 00:12:38.527
- Hey! Welcome, DiMeos.
- Hello, Candy.
320
00:12:38.530 --> 00:12:40.864
We could use plenty of help
here in the donation center,
321
00:12:40.867 --> 00:12:44.268
but I do have a solo
task for one of you.
322
00:12:44.270 --> 00:12:45.603
Although I wish it could be you.
323
00:12:45.605 --> 00:12:47.268
Isn't that right, you little life saver?
324
00:12:47.271 --> 00:12:48.606
I'll do it.
325
00:12:48.608 --> 00:12:50.474
Perfect.
326
00:12:50.476 --> 00:12:52.777
Ooh, I'm gonna get you a bell.
327
00:12:56.349 --> 00:12:58.450
I just got a $500 donation!
328
00:12:58.480 --> 00:12:59.583
Score one good deed for the DiMeos!
329
00:12:59.585 --> 00:13:00.748
$500?
330
00:13:00.751 --> 00:13:02.286
That means we've
reached this hour's goal.
331
00:13:02.288 --> 00:13:03.768
Hey, listen up, everybody.
332
00:13:03.771 --> 00:13:06.524
Maya wins the hourly incentive.
333
00:13:06.526 --> 00:13:10.895
Two box seats to the
Ducks game, valued at $600.
334
00:13:12.832 --> 00:13:14.701
You've gotta be kidding me...
335
00:13:14.704 --> 00:13:15.943
You're right.
336
00:13:15.946 --> 00:13:18.269
Bring the whole family...
Five box seats! Yay!
337
00:13:20.106 --> 00:13:22.640
Good job.
338
00:13:31.840 --> 00:13:33.451
Yeah!
339
00:13:33.453 --> 00:13:34.719
How's my butt taste?
340
00:13:34.721 --> 00:13:36.530
I don't know, Kiki!
341
00:13:36.550 --> 00:13:37.688
It's her butt I'm tasting, okay?
342
00:13:49.235 --> 00:13:51.302
Did anyone taste my butt?
343
00:13:52.739 --> 00:13:55.940
- How do you like your new Santa?
- He's great!
344
00:13:55.942 --> 00:13:57.441
You and I don't have any beef.
345
00:13:57.443 --> 00:13:58.442
Just Dylan.
346
00:13:58.444 --> 00:13:59.877
Yeah, it was Dylan messing with me,
347
00:13:59.879 --> 00:14:01.112
and I'm not crazy.
348
00:14:01.114 --> 00:14:03.114
I don't have a feud with a dog.
349
00:14:04.117 --> 00:14:05.850
Good talk.
350
00:14:09.970 --> 00:14:11.122
Hey, no!
351
00:14:11.124 --> 00:14:12.423
Those could have chocolate.
352
00:14:12.425 --> 00:14:14.625
Wah!
353
00:14:20.266 --> 00:14:22.166
Ray, did you eat that whole cake?
354
00:14:22.168 --> 00:14:23.901
That was for all the volunteers.
355
00:14:23.903 --> 00:14:25.669
No, it was the dog.
356
00:14:26.973 --> 00:14:29.400
Pepper? Did you set me up?
357
00:14:29.420 --> 00:14:30.841
Are you blaming the hero dog?
358
00:14:30.843 --> 00:14:32.900
It was him!
359
00:14:32.110 --> 00:14:34.178
And I saved the family, not Pepper!
360
00:14:34.180 --> 00:14:36.414
He was probably barking
at a squirrel or something
361
00:14:36.416 --> 00:14:37.882
'cause he's just a dumb dog!
362
00:14:39.180 --> 00:14:41.886
That Dolph kid hates the hero dog!
363
00:14:47.497 --> 00:14:50.980
Good news, I've raised thousands
of dollars for these people.
364
00:14:50.101 --> 00:14:51.328
You know, our debt is paid.
365
00:14:51.330 --> 00:14:53.182
We can now go home, put on our goggles,
366
00:14:53.185 --> 00:14:54.832
and kill some giraffes!
367
00:14:54.834 --> 00:14:57.310
We're supposed to be setting them free.
368
00:14:57.313 --> 00:14:58.451
Oh.
369
00:15:00.460 --> 00:15:02.980
Mrs. DiMeo, before you
go, just one more thing.
370
00:15:04.109 --> 00:15:06.242
Jinglethoners, television audience,
371
00:15:06.245 --> 00:15:09.130
we all know about the
DiMeo family tragedy,
372
00:15:09.150 --> 00:15:10.448
yet they persevered,
373
00:15:10.450 --> 00:15:13.840
and they all showed
up to volunteer today.
374
00:15:13.860 --> 00:15:15.152
So, as a thank-you,
375
00:15:15.154 --> 00:15:18.856
we are going to give the
DiMeos all of today's proceeds!
376
00:15:23.329 --> 00:15:25.896
No, no! Please, stop giving us things.
377
00:15:25.898 --> 00:15:28.760
You don't get it! We're liars!
378
00:15:28.790 --> 00:15:29.800
The presents that burned under our tree
379
00:15:29.802 --> 00:15:31.362
were collectively worth $7.
380
00:15:31.365 --> 00:15:33.404
Don't judge her.
381
00:15:33.406 --> 00:15:35.673
The stuff showed up,
and, yeah, we kept it!
382
00:15:35.675 --> 00:15:37.865
Would you have done anything different?
383
00:15:37.868 --> 00:15:39.693
Well, somebody call Heaven.
384
00:15:39.696 --> 00:15:42.113
We just found a bunch
of new Christmas angels.
385
00:15:42.115 --> 00:15:44.154
Yeah.
386
00:15:44.157 --> 00:15:46.683
Oh, yeah, go on, then. Waa-waa-waa.
387
00:15:46.686 --> 00:15:48.419
We don't care. Go on. Boo all you want.
388
00:15:50.623 --> 00:15:52.220
That's actually quite hurtful.
389
00:15:52.240 --> 00:15:54.654
Out, out, out. Out
through the grotto. Out.
390
00:15:57.568 --> 00:15:58.600
Wait, where's the dog?
391
00:15:58.603 --> 00:15:59.968
Oh, I left him with this old couple.
392
00:15:59.970 --> 00:16:01.389
They said they'd drop him home later.
393
00:16:01.391 --> 00:16:02.703
Oh, he's back there somewhere.
394
00:16:02.705 --> 00:16:04.371
I'm sorry, I can't stop lying!
395
00:16:04.373 --> 00:16:05.420
Weirdos!
396
00:16:06.909 --> 00:16:08.642
You've seen a choir before.
397
00:16:08.644 --> 00:16:09.843
Let's go!
398
00:16:09.845 --> 00:16:11.745
JJ, what are you doing here?
399
00:16:11.747 --> 00:16:14.180
"Kenneth needs elec-tro-lytes."
400
00:16:14.210 --> 00:16:15.453
Well, I've got no questions.
401
00:16:15.967 --> 00:16:17.498
Quick, come on, come on, come on.
402
00:16:18.854 --> 00:16:22.550
Look, we're hiding from a mob
of Santa-loving DiMeo haters,
403
00:16:22.570 --> 00:16:23.957
and I'm sorry I got us
into this stupid mess.
404
00:16:23.959 --> 00:16:26.226
I just saw the chance to give you
everything you've always wanted,
405
00:16:26.228 --> 00:16:28.287
and then I couldn't say no.
406
00:16:28.290 --> 00:16:30.432
- ♪ Silent night ♪
- "That's ridiculous, Mom.
407
00:16:30.435 --> 00:16:33.700
Sure, we're hiding
like hunted criminals,
408
00:16:33.702 --> 00:16:35.702
- ♪ Holy night ♪
- but we have each other.
409
00:16:35.704 --> 00:16:37.451
That's what matters."
410
00:16:37.454 --> 00:16:38.739
- ♪ All is calm ♪
- RAY: JJ's right.
411
00:16:38.741 --> 00:16:40.730
This Christmas more than ever.
412
00:16:40.750 --> 00:16:41.708
Our house could've burned down.
413
00:16:41.710 --> 00:16:43.276
- ♪ All is bright ♪
- We could've died!
414
00:16:43.278 --> 00:16:45.445
And Ray saved us.
415
00:16:45.447 --> 00:16:47.581
I know, but you guys are being sweet,
416
00:16:47.583 --> 00:16:49.745
and songs about America always get me.
417
00:16:49.747 --> 00:16:50.874
- ♪ Round yon Virgin ♪
- It's "Silent Night."
418
00:16:50.876 --> 00:16:52.686
- ♪ Mother and Child ♪
- It wouldn't kill us expose her to church.
419
00:16:52.688 --> 00:16:54.688
- No.
- That's why I'm torturing you.
420
00:16:54.690 --> 00:16:56.189
I couldn't handle that it was you,
421
00:16:56.191 --> 00:16:57.791
but you did save us.
422
00:16:57.793 --> 00:16:59.159
You're a hero, Ray.
423
00:16:59.161 --> 00:17:02.651
Wow. I honestly don't care
what anyone thinks now.
424
00:17:02.654 --> 00:17:04.357
♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪
425
00:17:04.360 --> 00:17:06.566
All right, Kenneth
needs his electrolytes.
426
00:17:07.670 --> 00:17:09.670
The coast is clear.
427
00:17:09.672 --> 00:17:12.239
Pepper, you found them.
428
00:17:13.154 --> 00:17:14.307
Traitor.
429
00:17:17.780 --> 00:17:19.568
"Get up." Why?
430
00:17:19.571 --> 00:17:21.839
Kendall's just gonna
knock me back on my butt.
431
00:17:23.520 --> 00:17:25.886
"Think of all the
times I tried something
432
00:17:25.888 --> 00:17:29.322
and I failed first and wanted to quit,
433
00:17:29.324 --> 00:17:32.590
but you made me keep going."
434
00:17:32.610 --> 00:17:34.270
Yeah, well, I'm not like you.
435
00:17:34.290 --> 00:17:35.295
I hate failure.
436
00:17:37.660 --> 00:17:40.167
"You worry about me next year.
437
00:17:40.176 --> 00:17:43.177
I worry about you.
438
00:17:45.541 --> 00:17:49.509
I want you to have
something when I'm gone."
439
00:17:50.713 --> 00:17:52.334
And you think coaching is it?
440
00:17:53.816 --> 00:17:55.150
Me, too.
441
00:17:55.170 --> 00:17:56.149
I can do this.
442
00:17:56.151 --> 00:17:57.551
It's only 50 to zero.
443
00:17:57.553 --> 00:17:58.752
51.
444
00:17:58.754 --> 00:18:01.529
In no universe was that a 3, Kendall!
445
00:18:01.532 --> 00:18:03.294
Ms. Kensington, we're very sorry.
446
00:18:03.297 --> 00:18:04.329
Well, you should be.
447
00:18:04.332 --> 00:18:05.565
But, thanks to your family,
448
00:18:05.568 --> 00:18:07.761
donations are pouring in like
never before. Look at that.
449
00:18:07.763 --> 00:18:09.651
$100 from Christmas Carly...
450
00:18:09.654 --> 00:18:12.132
"Hope this helps after you
got scammed by those monsters."
451
00:18:12.134 --> 00:18:13.174
Oh, that's us.
452
00:18:13.177 --> 00:18:15.143
$200 from DanTheMan45...
453
00:18:15.146 --> 00:18:18.171
"Save X-Mas! Can't let
the DiMeos win!" Aww.
454
00:18:18.173 --> 00:18:19.706
"Get well soon, Beth"?
455
00:18:19.708 --> 00:18:22.209
Oh, I think that might've
been a medical GoFundMe.
456
00:18:22.211 --> 00:18:23.610
- Oh.
- Anyhoo, you know,
457
00:18:23.612 --> 00:18:25.932
I always wanted people
to give out of love,
458
00:18:25.935 --> 00:18:28.276
but it turns out,
disgust works even better.
459
00:18:28.279 --> 00:18:30.617
So, in a weird way, we did a good thing.
460
00:18:30.620 --> 00:18:33.299
Even though everyone
thinks that we're awful.
461
00:18:33.302 --> 00:18:35.880
Who cares what everyone thinks?
462
00:18:35.900 --> 00:18:36.590
I know I don't anymore.
463
00:18:36.592 --> 00:18:39.960
Hold on. What if we
could do even more good
464
00:18:39.962 --> 00:18:42.562
by seeming even more bad?
465
00:18:42.564 --> 00:18:44.931
All right, here we go.
466
00:18:44.933 --> 00:18:46.299
Boom, baby!
467
00:18:47.302 --> 00:18:49.690
Oh, Canada.
468
00:18:50.472 --> 00:18:52.404
I don't know!
469
00:18:52.407 --> 00:18:55.960
I'm out of material. You've
usually given up by now.
470
00:18:56.751 --> 00:18:58.378
Girls, what are you doing here?
471
00:18:58.380 --> 00:19:00.146
It's 4:00. Time for practice.
472
00:19:00.148 --> 00:19:01.648
Oh, it's 4:00?
473
00:19:01.650 --> 00:19:02.924
I've been losing for two hours?
474
00:19:03.938 --> 00:19:06.852
You've been playing for two
hours without scoring a point?
475
00:19:06.855 --> 00:19:09.656
That's amazing! How do you not quit?
476
00:19:09.658 --> 00:19:13.260
Yeah, I mean, I can relate to the
failure, but not the persistence.
477
00:19:13.262 --> 00:19:15.849
Well, girls, failure
is part of the process.
478
00:19:15.852 --> 00:19:18.164
But this is worth it,
so I'm not gonna give up.
479
00:19:19.101 --> 00:19:21.340
I knew we should've
played to 20, Kendall.
480
00:19:21.360 --> 00:19:23.357
"We"? Y-you don't do anything, Kiki!
481
00:19:23.360 --> 00:19:24.571
Oh, so we just gonna act like
482
00:19:24.573 --> 00:19:26.306
I don't work part-time at a law firm?
483
00:19:37.219 --> 00:19:38.985
What? That's right!
484
00:19:38.987 --> 00:19:40.365
Yes!
485
00:19:40.368 --> 00:19:43.315
Whose house? Good
Halloween House's house!
486
00:19:43.318 --> 00:19:45.759
Girls, consider that
your first practice.
487
00:19:45.761 --> 00:19:47.127
Pick this up again tomorrow?
488
00:19:47.129 --> 00:19:48.612
- Yes.
- Thank you, coach.
489
00:19:48.615 --> 00:19:50.163
Nice job, Kenneth.
490
00:19:50.165 --> 00:19:51.965
Thanks. Feels good to get one.
491
00:19:53.235 --> 00:19:54.896
Wait, I got one, right?
492
00:19:54.899 --> 00:19:57.103
You didn't give me one
because of the speech, right?
493
00:19:57.105 --> 00:19:58.705
Merry Christmas, Kenny.
494
00:19:58.707 --> 00:20:00.600
Kendall, I need closure!
495
00:20:00.800 --> 00:20:01.775
Honey, what you need
is a scented candle,
496
00:20:01.777 --> 00:20:03.710
'cause what you did
is stink up the place.
497
00:20:03.712 --> 00:20:05.545
- Take it easy.
- That's our coach.
498
00:20:05.547 --> 00:20:07.580
I like coaching.
499
00:20:07.582 --> 00:20:09.683
Hello, Jinglethon.
500
00:20:09.685 --> 00:20:11.518
We just wanted to rub it in your face
501
00:20:11.520 --> 00:20:14.854
that we took Santa's Purpose
for all they're worth.
502
00:20:14.856 --> 00:20:17.657
Yeah, and they are never
gonna see that money again
503
00:20:17.659 --> 00:20:19.659
because Christmas is a sham!
504
00:20:19.661 --> 00:20:22.280
And if you people here
and watching at home
505
00:20:22.300 --> 00:20:24.531
really cared about helping others,
506
00:20:24.533 --> 00:20:26.700
that money thermometer would be full.
507
00:20:29.304 --> 00:20:31.571
And, yeah, we have a hero dog.
508
00:20:31.573 --> 00:20:33.701
Here, Pepper, you want a treat?
509
00:20:33.704 --> 00:20:36.475
Too bad!
510
00:20:49.291 --> 00:20:52.692
When you heard that
they were volunteering,
511
00:20:52.694 --> 00:20:54.940
is this what you pictured?
512
00:20:54.960 --> 00:20:56.296
Yeah, me too.
513
00:20:59.263 --> 00:21:03.596
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
36180
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.