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00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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00:00:33,752 --> 00:00:36,547
[classical Indian flute music playing]
3
00:00:55,691 --> 00:00:58,151
[filter whirring]
4
00:01:00,654 --> 00:01:03,240
[door creaks quietly]
5
00:01:18,213 --> 00:01:19,464
[snoring]
6
00:01:29,433 --> 00:01:32,185
[door creaks quietly]
7
00:01:54,958 --> 00:01:57,169
[refrigerator rattles]
8
00:02:05,093 --> 00:02:06,887
[ragged breaths]
9
00:02:08,764 --> 00:02:11,600
[soft gasps]
10
00:02:17,147 --> 00:02:18,231
[gulps]
11
00:02:32,371 --> 00:02:34,873
["Locomotive Breath" by Jethro Tull]
12
00:02:41,963 --> 00:02:45,050
♪ In the shuffling madness ♪
13
00:02:45,550 --> 00:02:48,095
♪ Of the locomotive breath ♪
14
00:02:49,721 --> 00:02:53,225
♪ Runs the all-time loser ♪
15
00:02:53,308 --> 00:02:56,228
♪ Headlong to his death ♪
16
00:02:56,311 --> 00:03:00,148
♪ Oh, he feels the piston scraping ♪
17
00:03:00,232 --> 00:03:04,152
♪ Steam breaking on his brow ♪
18
00:03:04,236 --> 00:03:07,989
♪ Old Charlie stole the handle ♪
19
00:03:08,073 --> 00:03:13,578
♪ And the train, it won't stop goingNo way to slow down ♪
20
00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:17,249
♪ Oh-oh! ♪
21
00:03:20,836 --> 00:03:23,171
♪ He sees his children jumping off ♪
22
00:03:24,089 --> 00:03:26,508
♪ At stations one by one ♪
23
00:03:27,926 --> 00:03:31,513
♪ His woman and his best friend ♪
24
00:03:31,596 --> 00:03:34,516
♪ In bed and having fun ♪
25
00:03:34,599 --> 00:03:38,437
♪ Oh, he's crawling down the corridor ♪
26
00:03:39,187 --> 00:03:41,940
♪ On his hands and knees ♪
27
00:03:42,607 --> 00:03:45,569
♪ Old Charlie stole the handle ♪
28
00:03:46,611 --> 00:03:49,322
♪ And the train, it won't stop going ♪
29
00:03:49,406 --> 00:03:51,533
♪ No way to slow down ♪
30
00:03:52,993 --> 00:03:55,746
♪ Yeah-eah! ♪
31
00:04:01,251 --> 00:04:02,127
♪ Ow! ♪
32
00:04:02,210 --> 00:04:04,171
[microphone feedback]
33
00:04:04,254 --> 00:04:07,466
[man] Testing, testing. Mic testing.
34
00:04:08,341 --> 00:04:11,470
Check, one, two, one, two. Testing.
35
00:04:11,553 --> 00:04:15,724
Topping the preliminary round
with 29 out of 30...
36
00:04:16,975 --> 00:04:21,938
Bangalore Uni A,
represented by Naman Bala...
37
00:04:23,106 --> 00:04:25,108
Ramu Iyengar...
38
00:04:25,942 --> 00:04:27,652
Ilash Ismail...
39
00:04:27,736 --> 00:04:29,571
-Where's Ilash?
-[knocking]
40
00:04:29,654 --> 00:04:32,657
-[announcer] ...and Ajay Iyer.
-Ajay.
41
00:04:34,117 --> 00:04:37,996
Will the team captain
please come up for the draw of lots?
42
00:04:38,079 --> 00:04:40,415
[all mutter] B.U.B.U.
43
00:04:40,499 --> 00:04:42,209
[announcer] Team captain?
44
00:04:43,210 --> 00:04:44,377
[announcer] Hmm...
45
00:04:45,253 --> 00:04:48,799
Bangalore Uni A team has finally arrived.
46
00:04:49,925 --> 00:04:55,472
In the words of Shakespeare, better three
hours too soon than a minute too late.
47
00:04:56,181 --> 00:04:59,059
You will have to sit in row six.
48
00:04:59,142 --> 00:05:03,855
We should have come for the draft lots.
Row six is the worst strategically.
49
00:05:04,606 --> 00:05:08,193
Who cares where we sit?
We'll win anyway.
50
00:05:08,276 --> 00:05:11,404
We have worse problems.
Ilash is in Hyderabad.
51
00:05:11,488 --> 00:05:12,948
[girl] Good luck, Naman!
52
00:05:13,865 --> 00:05:16,493
There's your pet volcano, Stromboli.
53
00:05:16,576 --> 00:05:18,912
Go rape your cow, Ra-moo.
54
00:05:18,995 --> 00:05:22,541
Come on, ra. Give her Etna a chance.
55
00:05:22,624 --> 00:05:25,794
Yeah, cover the face, fire the base.
56
00:05:25,877 --> 00:05:28,088
[announcer] Are all the teams complete?
57
00:05:34,636 --> 00:05:37,305
I have been preparing.
I'll be very helpful, I promise.
58
00:05:37,389 --> 00:05:40,684
Just keep your mouth shut
and we'll win, okay?
59
00:05:40,767 --> 00:05:43,979
-[applause]
-[announcer] Bangalore Uni B.
60
00:05:44,062 --> 00:05:45,814
Back in the 18th century,
61
00:05:45,897 --> 00:05:51,236
Eton College had a grammar book
which listed a set of words from Latin
62
00:05:51,319 --> 00:05:54,573
which all meant "of little or no value."
63
00:05:54,656 --> 00:05:59,160
As a joke, somebody put all four of these
together and created a new word.
64
00:05:59,244 --> 00:06:05,584
The first recorded use
is by William Shenstone in 1741.
65
00:06:05,667 --> 00:06:07,168
What is the word?
66
00:06:08,378 --> 00:06:10,839
Looks like our juniors
have Calcutta ambitions.
67
00:06:11,631 --> 00:06:15,594
Why go all the way to Calcutta when
the Black Hole of Bangalore is right here?
68
00:06:15,677 --> 00:06:17,178
Time is running out!
69
00:06:17,929 --> 00:06:21,600
The answer is
floccinaucinihilipilification.
70
00:06:22,559 --> 00:06:24,269
[announcer] Correct answer.
71
00:06:24,352 --> 00:06:26,896
Bangalore B are the leaders now.
72
00:06:28,189 --> 00:06:32,819
And now for the ultimate question
to decide the winner.
73
00:06:33,653 --> 00:06:39,367
Gerald Rusgrove and Charles
founded a publishing house in 1908.
74
00:06:39,451 --> 00:06:42,996
Today they dominate a particular genre.
75
00:06:43,079 --> 00:06:48,168
The company is named after
their famous surname. Name the company.
76
00:06:49,002 --> 00:06:51,338
-Simon & Schuster?
-Hodder & Stoughton?
77
00:06:51,421 --> 00:06:54,507
They don't dominate any particular genre.
78
00:06:57,093 --> 00:07:01,348
Bangalore University A,
do we have an answer?
79
00:07:01,431 --> 00:07:02,557
[indistinct whisper]
80
00:07:04,309 --> 00:07:06,353
Is it Mills & Boon? Romance?
81
00:07:07,270 --> 00:07:09,230
[announcer] It is...
82
00:07:12,609 --> 00:07:13,777
indeed!
83
00:07:13,860 --> 00:07:15,904
[cheering]
84
00:07:15,987 --> 00:07:21,826
[announcer] Bangalore Uni A
are the winners of this quiz contest,
85
00:07:21,910 --> 00:07:27,290
and will represent us at the
All India Quiz Competition in Calcutta.
86
00:07:27,374 --> 00:07:29,167
-[applause]
-Thank you.
87
00:07:36,049 --> 00:07:38,802
-Naman.
-We won book coupons worth 750 rupees.
88
00:07:38,885 --> 00:07:40,261
That's your share.
89
00:07:40,345 --> 00:07:44,557
No, that's not necessary. It was my honor
to be in the quiz with you.
90
00:07:48,269 --> 00:07:50,480
I insist. After all--
91
00:07:50,563 --> 00:07:54,526
Listen, Ash, we have 500 worth of
book coupons between the three of us.
92
00:07:54,609 --> 00:07:57,904
We'll sell it to you
at the usual discount. 300?
93
00:07:57,988 --> 00:08:00,323
Done. But on one condition.
94
00:08:00,407 --> 00:08:02,659
I get to come with you guys
wherever you are drinking tonight.
95
00:08:02,742 --> 00:08:05,453
Forget it. We'll find somebody else.
96
00:08:05,537 --> 00:08:06,955
No, no, no, no, no.
97
00:08:07,706 --> 00:08:10,083
I always keep cash handy for your coupons.
98
00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:22,721
Bye.
99
00:08:25,223 --> 00:08:27,100
[motorbike horn]
100
00:08:29,811 --> 00:08:32,147
Sure you don't want a lift to the dhaba?
101
00:08:32,230 --> 00:08:34,482
-Ajay isn't dead.
-Yet.
102
00:08:42,741 --> 00:08:44,451
Hey, you, junior!
103
00:08:52,125 --> 00:08:53,376
What's your name?
104
00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:57,797
-Randeep.
-Randy!
105
00:08:57,881 --> 00:08:59,466
[pop music plays]
106
00:09:04,637 --> 00:09:07,807
I, uh... I don't really drink.
107
00:09:07,891 --> 00:09:10,185
Nonsense. Everybody drinks.
108
00:09:10,268 --> 00:09:11,728
[Naman] It's like fucking.
109
00:09:11,811 --> 00:09:13,897
Once your dick is inside the hole,
110
00:09:13,980 --> 00:09:17,233
it goes all the way up to the cervix,
prompting the inevitable--
111
00:09:17,317 --> 00:09:18,651
Cervix with a smile.
112
00:09:22,197 --> 00:09:24,783
[all] Chairs!
113
00:09:27,827 --> 00:09:31,039
-Bangalore University, bottoms up.
-B.U.B.U.
114
00:09:32,123 --> 00:09:33,249
Go!
115
00:09:38,755 --> 00:09:41,800
-Naman seven secs, Ajay nine secs.
-And Randy, no sex.
116
00:09:42,634 --> 00:09:45,095
-Bravo.
-Garçon.
117
00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:50,391
[man murmurs indistinctly]
118
00:09:51,768 --> 00:09:54,395
What ra, dei?
That would have bought an extra pitcher.
119
00:09:54,479 --> 00:09:56,981
Brahmans must be magnanimous
to the servant classes
120
00:09:57,065 --> 00:09:59,734
-to preserve the natural order of things.
-[Ajay] Correct.
121
00:09:59,818 --> 00:10:02,278
If everybody gets degrees,
who will clean our toilets?
122
00:10:02,362 --> 00:10:05,615
In our village, even if an untouchable's
shadow touches my grandfather,
123
00:10:05,698 --> 00:10:07,200
he has to have a bath.
124
00:10:08,701 --> 00:10:09,786
The boy speaks.
125
00:10:13,957 --> 00:10:17,293
Trichinopolies.
As smoked by Sherlock Holmes.
126
00:10:20,588 --> 00:10:22,924
OK, guys, I have to leave.
My father will be waiting.
127
00:10:23,007 --> 00:10:26,970
Ever wondered why the back
of Ramu's neck is black?
128
00:10:27,053 --> 00:10:31,558
When Ramu was born, his father
rubbed his dick on the back of his neck.
129
00:10:31,641 --> 00:10:34,018
-[Ramu mutters]
-[boys laugh]
130
00:10:39,274 --> 00:10:44,028
Randy. If you continue to be
this correct blend of slavish deference
131
00:10:44,112 --> 00:10:48,199
and obsequiousness to God, i.e. me,
132
00:10:48,283 --> 00:10:51,244
who knows,
someday you could be our quiz team fourth.
133
00:10:53,079 --> 00:10:58,376
-But I'm in Tina's team--
-Tina, Beena? Who cares? All cunts.
134
00:10:59,419 --> 00:11:02,130
Stay second all your life, by all means.
135
00:11:02,839 --> 00:11:03,965
It's your choice.
136
00:11:06,718 --> 00:11:07,886
Well?
137
00:11:17,270 --> 00:11:19,147
[coughs]
138
00:11:22,650 --> 00:11:24,444
-He's done a George.
-Horses for courses.
139
00:11:24,527 --> 00:11:25,528
Neigh!
140
00:11:29,532 --> 00:11:32,619
You won't be allowed into Valhalla
if you don't know the argot.
141
00:11:34,078 --> 00:11:36,456
I'll give you a clue. Painter.
142
00:11:36,539 --> 00:11:40,460
John Stubbs. British painter
best known for his paintings of horses.
143
00:11:40,543 --> 00:11:44,672
So when you "do a George,"
you stub out a cigar.
144
00:11:46,424 --> 00:11:49,052
May the horse be with you.
145
00:11:58,686 --> 00:12:01,773
A beaker full of the warm south
for the lad here.
146
00:12:01,856 --> 00:12:04,150
-[Randy retches]
-[Naman and Ajay urinating]
147
00:12:04,233 --> 00:12:06,945
But you're not allowed
to vomit on the tree.
148
00:12:08,696 --> 00:12:15,536
But if you must, precision is key,
oh dilated pupil.
149
00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:17,455
[man reads question]
150
00:12:24,045 --> 00:12:26,839
[chanting Sanskrit mantras]
151
00:12:58,037 --> 00:13:04,585
[Naman's father] As it says in
the holy Gita, "tranquility, restraint,
152
00:13:04,669 --> 00:13:10,967
austerity, purity,
forgiveness, uprightness...
153
00:13:11,801 --> 00:13:15,930
knowledge, wisdom and faith in God
154
00:13:16,014 --> 00:13:18,141
are the duties of the Brahmans...
155
00:13:19,350 --> 00:13:21,477
born of our innate nature."
156
00:13:23,229 --> 00:13:25,815
[Naman's father chants]
157
00:13:27,567 --> 00:13:29,402
[Naman joins in]
158
00:13:35,450 --> 00:13:37,618
[chanting]
159
00:13:46,502 --> 00:13:48,254
[bell jingling]
160
00:13:58,556 --> 00:13:59,557
Naman.
161
00:14:14,364 --> 00:14:16,741
[applause]
162
00:14:23,373 --> 00:14:26,000
["Alabama Song (Whiskey Bar)"]
163
00:14:45,019 --> 00:14:47,480
I feel like a new hermaphrodite again.
164
00:14:47,563 --> 00:14:53,069
♪ Well, show me the wayto the next whiskey bar ♪
165
00:14:53,152 --> 00:14:55,905
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
166
00:14:55,988 --> 00:14:58,825
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
167
00:14:58,908 --> 00:15:04,414
♪ Show me the wayto the next whiskey bar ♪
168
00:15:04,497 --> 00:15:07,291
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
169
00:15:07,375 --> 00:15:10,169
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
170
00:15:10,253 --> 00:15:15,425
♪ For if we don't findthe next whiskey bar ♪
171
00:15:15,508 --> 00:15:18,094
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
172
00:15:18,177 --> 00:15:20,888
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
173
00:15:20,972 --> 00:15:26,269
♪ I tell you, I tell you,I tell you we must die ♪
174
00:15:27,186 --> 00:15:29,230
[TV plays quietly]
175
00:15:33,109 --> 00:15:35,278
[applause on TV]
176
00:15:35,361 --> 00:15:38,573
[man] Welcome backto Cos Theta Quiz Contest.
177
00:15:38,656 --> 00:15:41,993
I am Brian D'Costa,and my next question is...
178
00:15:42,994 --> 00:15:44,996
[Brian reads question]
179
00:15:54,755 --> 00:15:57,216
I'm ready to marry her for a week.
180
00:16:04,891 --> 00:16:07,768
Aureolae, my friend.
181
00:16:08,895 --> 00:16:10,897
God is in the aureolae.
182
00:16:11,939 --> 00:16:13,608
[car horn]
183
00:16:16,319 --> 00:16:18,863
♪ I'm Henry VIII, I am ♪
184
00:16:18,946 --> 00:16:21,449
♪ Henry VIII, I am, I am ♪
185
00:16:21,532 --> 00:16:24,202
♪ I got married to the widow next door ♪
186
00:16:24,285 --> 00:16:26,454
♪ And she's been marriedseven times before ♪
187
00:16:26,537 --> 00:16:28,664
-[all] Henry!
-Waste fuckers.
188
00:16:28,748 --> 00:16:31,209
What ra cripple? Bull broke your leg?
189
00:16:31,292 --> 00:16:33,586
[laughter]
190
00:16:33,669 --> 00:16:34,670
Hey!
191
00:16:34,754 --> 00:16:36,672
-Show me that.
-I'm having her tonight.
192
00:16:36,756 --> 00:16:38,925
Why don't we all go and look at it
at my place?
193
00:16:39,008 --> 00:16:41,344
No, no, no, no. No. No.
194
00:16:41,427 --> 00:16:42,970
We have to prepare for tomorrow's quiz.
195
00:16:47,808 --> 00:16:50,102
-[Naman] Henry.
-A trick.
196
00:16:50,978 --> 00:16:53,773
When you've finished,
let go of your dick when you cum.
197
00:16:55,233 --> 00:17:01,531
Cover your face, then you watch your dick.
Like an electric meter, it will flick.
198
00:17:01,614 --> 00:17:04,200
[he makes a clicking sound]
199
00:17:04,784 --> 00:17:06,035
[chuckles]
200
00:17:06,118 --> 00:17:09,539
What ra, Naman? We all could have
magazined at Henry's house.
201
00:17:09,622 --> 00:17:12,625
-[Naman] His sofa is full of cum.
-[giggling]
202
00:17:16,879 --> 00:17:18,256
Oh, no.
203
00:17:18,339 --> 00:17:21,717
-["Infatuation" by Rod Stewart plays]
-♪ Oh, no, not again ♪
204
00:17:22,718 --> 00:17:26,556
♪ It hurts so goodI don't understand ♪
205
00:17:26,639 --> 00:17:28,599
♪ Infatuation ♪
206
00:17:31,477 --> 00:17:33,437
♪ Infatuation ♪
207
00:17:35,481 --> 00:17:37,567
-♪ Infatuation ♪-[no audible dialogue]
208
00:17:39,902 --> 00:17:41,654
♪ Infatuation ♪
209
00:17:44,574 --> 00:17:46,826
-[music stops]
-♪ Infatuation ♪
210
00:17:47,952 --> 00:17:50,288
-♪ Infatuation ♪-Chee chee, Ramu.
211
00:17:51,330 --> 00:17:54,625
-[Ajay] Nice arse.
-You will not, none of you,
212
00:17:54,709 --> 00:17:58,170
refer to your future sister-in-law
in a sexual manner ever again.
213
00:17:58,254 --> 00:18:00,006
Ramu! Understood?
214
00:18:02,258 --> 00:18:03,843
[snickering]
215
00:18:08,431 --> 00:18:09,849
[snoring]
216
00:18:19,775 --> 00:18:21,527
[funky music]
217
00:18:42,340 --> 00:18:43,799
[woman moans]
218
00:19:27,343 --> 00:19:28,928
[knocking on door]
219
00:19:29,512 --> 00:19:31,180
[Naman's mother] Naman?
220
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:48,781
[fan speeds up]
221
00:19:51,909 --> 00:19:53,869
[screams]
222
00:19:53,953 --> 00:19:55,871
[screams continue]
223
00:19:55,955 --> 00:19:57,748
[bell tolls]
224
00:19:57,832 --> 00:20:01,127
You must be wondering what The Merchantof Venice has to do with Hamlet.
225
00:20:01,210 --> 00:20:05,381
You see, this Polonius is a dirty fellow.
226
00:20:05,464 --> 00:20:07,091
Very shallow.
227
00:20:07,174 --> 00:20:11,011
What he doesn't know is that
is if he spits into the air... pooo!
228
00:20:16,934 --> 00:20:18,853
Hey, maths motherfucker.
229
00:20:21,272 --> 00:20:23,357
To what do we owe this dubious honor?
230
00:20:23,441 --> 00:20:27,737
I was in the vicinity, so I thought
I'd come see if you're around.
231
00:20:27,820 --> 00:20:33,033
Now that you have drunk your ocular fill,
wench, a swift departure mayhaps.
232
00:20:33,117 --> 00:20:35,828
Miles to go? Promises to keep?
233
00:20:35,911 --> 00:20:38,706
-[Ash] But I...
-So, handicap.
234
00:20:38,789 --> 00:20:42,501
-[Ash] Ilash.
-Who came second in the quiz?
235
00:20:42,585 --> 00:20:44,462
-The junior team.
-Oh...
236
00:20:44,545 --> 00:20:47,256
Let me tell you what happened
to my junior.
237
00:20:47,339 --> 00:20:52,011
I was coming back from Hyderabad
on a train, AC first class, of course,
238
00:20:52,094 --> 00:20:55,431
and there she was, on the lower berth.
239
00:20:55,514 --> 00:20:58,934
It was lights out,
so I put my reading lights on
240
00:20:59,018 --> 00:21:04,440
and I looked down through the curtains
and she is staring straight back at me.
241
00:21:06,442 --> 00:21:09,403
So I pull back, I'm reading my book.
242
00:21:10,196 --> 00:21:11,989
She climbs up...
243
00:21:12,823 --> 00:21:17,369
and she's... all over me, OK?
244
00:21:19,497 --> 00:21:21,916
She's rubbing.
245
00:21:23,667 --> 00:21:26,212
She's rubbing herself.
246
00:21:27,338 --> 00:21:29,548
[up-tempo dance music plays]
247
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,651
Where has that fellow gone?
248
00:21:48,734 --> 00:21:51,695
I'm sure he's taken
our ticket money and run.
249
00:21:51,779 --> 00:21:53,697
[man] Have faith, grasshopper.
250
00:21:53,781 --> 00:21:55,157
There he is.
251
00:22:08,754 --> 00:22:09,755
Thank you, uncle.
252
00:22:09,839 --> 00:22:11,757
Your seats are right next to mine.
253
00:22:15,511 --> 00:22:17,096
I feel violated.
254
00:22:19,849 --> 00:22:21,517
Isn't there a law against visual rape?
255
00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:24,603
In that case, we would all be doing
ten to 20.
256
00:22:28,107 --> 00:22:31,694
-[up-tempo music playing]
-[women gasping]
257
00:22:52,339 --> 00:22:53,382
Ramu.
258
00:22:57,970 --> 00:22:59,138
Appa.
259
00:22:59,221 --> 00:23:00,431
Get in.
260
00:23:09,857 --> 00:23:14,069
You have to do everything possible
to endear us of Ramu's dad, don't you?
261
00:23:25,497 --> 00:23:27,041
[slow music plays]
262
00:23:30,836 --> 00:23:35,716
"My love is like a red, red rose
that is newly sprung in June.
263
00:23:36,342 --> 00:23:39,386
My love is like a melody
that is sweetly played in tune."
264
00:23:40,179 --> 00:23:41,639
To the chariot!
265
00:23:42,389 --> 00:23:43,390
[engine starts]
266
00:23:45,934 --> 00:23:48,604
-What am I supposed to do?
-Exist.
267
00:23:54,109 --> 00:23:56,987
[indistinct chatter]
268
00:24:29,770 --> 00:24:32,731
-[Ajay] D'Souza, she's not a Brahman.
-[Naman] So?
269
00:24:32,815 --> 00:24:35,734
-[Ajay] She's not even a Hindu.
-So?
270
00:24:35,818 --> 00:24:37,319
She's a Christian, ra.
271
00:24:38,237 --> 00:24:41,532
In Brahman tradition, one would conjoin
with the servant classes
272
00:24:41,615 --> 00:24:44,493
in order to transfer our sins to them,
because they are fucked anyway.
273
00:24:44,576 --> 00:24:46,161
[Ajay] Justification.
274
00:24:47,037 --> 00:24:50,457
You know how the Jesuits forcibly
converted most of us to Christianity?
275
00:24:50,541 --> 00:24:53,711
-Her grandparents are probably Brahman.
-Justification.
276
00:24:54,586 --> 00:24:56,797
[Naman] The scriptures say
that the role of a Brahman
277
00:24:56,880 --> 00:24:59,049
is to uplift the downtrodden classes.
278
00:24:59,133 --> 00:25:01,385
Miss D'Souza will be my project.
279
00:25:01,468 --> 00:25:03,178
Infatuation.
280
00:25:05,597 --> 00:25:07,808
[mid-tempo music plays on radio]
281
00:25:11,478 --> 00:25:15,274
Dear Rita, shall I compare thee
to a summer's day?
282
00:25:15,357 --> 00:25:17,317
But then I'm not the Bard.
283
00:25:17,401 --> 00:25:21,530
Interestingly, did you know
that Colonel Gaddafi of Libya
284
00:25:21,613 --> 00:25:24,408
claimed that William Shakespeare
was actually a Muslim Libyan
285
00:25:24,491 --> 00:25:26,118
named Wali Miya Sheikh Zubair.
286
00:25:28,871 --> 00:25:32,958
There is also loose talk that a certain
Sheshappa Iyer, a Brahman from Mysore,
287
00:25:33,041 --> 00:25:35,419
went to England and authored the plays.
288
00:25:37,796 --> 00:25:39,506
But enough of Avon.
289
00:25:39,590 --> 00:25:45,095
The Butler, in his immortal piece of poesy
titled, rather appropriately,
290
00:25:45,179 --> 00:25:47,431
A Drinking Song, he quoth...
291
00:25:50,184 --> 00:25:51,935
Thank you, Father.
292
00:25:59,276 --> 00:26:00,277
Thank you, Mother.
293
00:26:01,236 --> 00:26:03,238
[Brian reads question]
294
00:26:08,744 --> 00:26:12,456
[Naman] D'Souza, P... D'Souza, P...
295
00:26:12,539 --> 00:26:14,500
♪ Hello, operator ♪
296
00:26:14,583 --> 00:26:18,170
♪ You know that I've been waitingon this call, da, da, da ♪
297
00:26:18,253 --> 00:26:20,756
-♪ I said hey, operator... ♪
-[Naman] Bingo!
298
00:26:22,007 --> 00:26:25,344
♪ You make me nervouscos the line's engaged ♪
299
00:26:25,427 --> 00:26:28,388
♪ I can't believe we let itget to this stage ♪
300
00:26:28,472 --> 00:26:30,557
-♪ Sitting here-- ♪
-Shh! Shh! Shh!
301
00:26:31,308 --> 00:26:32,726
Hello. Hi, Rita.
302
00:26:32,810 --> 00:26:34,895
[man] Rita, Gita or Sita...
303
00:26:34,978 --> 00:26:38,941
You boys are just going to...
beat-a your meat-a.
304
00:26:39,775 --> 00:26:42,402
[heroic music]
305
00:26:42,486 --> 00:26:45,656
[people chanting]
Ronnie! Ronnie! Ronnie! Ronnie!
306
00:26:49,535 --> 00:26:51,787
Devastating wit. I'm impressed.
307
00:26:51,870 --> 00:26:56,208
Smart boy. But while you guys were busy
polishing your pathetic one-liners,
308
00:26:56,291 --> 00:27:00,128
-we just won the cricket championship.
-Let joy be unconfined.
309
00:27:00,212 --> 00:27:02,589
Tell me one physical activity
that you guys can do better than us.
310
00:27:02,673 --> 00:27:05,092
-Consume alcohol.
-In industrial quantities.
311
00:27:05,175 --> 00:27:06,593
[laughter]
312
00:27:06,677 --> 00:27:08,637
-Done. It's a challenge.
-A royal challenge?
313
00:27:09,930 --> 00:27:11,974
Tomorrow at home, our victory party.
314
00:27:12,057 --> 00:27:15,477
Get yourselves to Sadashivnagar
and ask anyone for Palace Tower.
315
00:27:15,561 --> 00:27:18,438
-Then see whose is bigger.
-We don't go for half measures.
316
00:27:18,522 --> 00:27:21,483
Ronnie, I'm hungry.
317
00:27:21,567 --> 00:27:23,110
Burger?
318
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:33,078
-I can't believe we get the brains--
-And they get the girls.
319
00:27:33,161 --> 00:27:36,748
That too, Coco-panties herself.
320
00:27:36,832 --> 00:27:39,835
Many a boat has sailed up
that coconut lagoon.
321
00:27:39,918 --> 00:27:42,796
[euphoric music]
322
00:27:56,643 --> 00:27:59,396
-[laughter]
-[guitar music playing]
323
00:28:00,397 --> 00:28:01,940
Rich bastard.
324
00:28:03,859 --> 00:28:08,155
Ramu, "a man of wealth has many enemies,
325
00:28:08,238 --> 00:28:10,866
while a man of knowledge
has many friends."
326
00:28:22,878 --> 00:28:25,130
[Ronnie] Oh-ho-ho-ho!
327
00:28:25,213 --> 00:28:29,801
So kind of you all to drag yourselves away
from your busy schedules.
328
00:28:29,885 --> 00:28:31,261
Must have been a drag.
329
00:28:32,262 --> 00:28:34,097
Ever used one of these babies before?
330
00:28:34,181 --> 00:28:37,476
-You have overcompensation issues.
-So you don't know how to use it?
331
00:28:37,559 --> 00:28:39,436
Just pose.
332
00:28:39,519 --> 00:28:40,979
Girls...
333
00:28:46,318 --> 00:28:49,780
So what do you think of the old pad?
Pretty impressive, huh?
334
00:28:50,697 --> 00:28:53,909
-Very Las Vegas.
-Dad's favorite city. We go every year.
335
00:28:53,992 --> 00:28:56,578
And where do you go for your hols,
big boy?
336
00:28:57,955 --> 00:29:01,083
I must inform you that we have
an excellent bovine maintenance--
337
00:29:01,166 --> 00:29:04,878
A cow farm? Ramu goes to a cow farm!
338
00:29:04,962 --> 00:29:07,589
I also heard you rape your cows.
339
00:29:07,673 --> 00:29:09,508
That's our joke.
340
00:29:09,591 --> 00:29:12,928
[Ronnie] Here, have a drink.
Better than your normal swill, I'm sure.
341
00:29:14,346 --> 00:29:16,848
-B.U.B.U.
-What else?
342
00:29:20,894 --> 00:29:23,897
Do you do everything so fast?
343
00:29:23,981 --> 00:29:26,233
He wouldn't know, baby.
He's never done it.
344
00:29:27,901 --> 00:29:29,361
Those who can't drink
should not throw stones.
345
00:29:29,444 --> 00:29:32,072
OK, bugger, put your mouth
where the bottle is.
346
00:29:35,826 --> 00:29:37,953
Praemonitus, praemunitus.
347
00:29:38,036 --> 00:29:39,663
-Huh?
-Forewarned is forearmed.
348
00:29:39,746 --> 00:29:43,458
Treatises of Fistula, circa 1425,
J. Arderne.
349
00:29:43,542 --> 00:29:47,212
-Also Don Quixote's Cervantes--
-Just shut up and drink, quiz fucks.
350
00:29:47,296 --> 00:29:49,631
[dance music playing]
351
00:30:01,393 --> 00:30:02,728
Drinks, I say!
352
00:30:10,694 --> 00:30:12,696
[record scratching]
353
00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:16,241
[music stops]
354
00:30:17,242 --> 00:30:18,577
I think my father is calling me.
355
00:30:18,660 --> 00:30:21,121
[snores]
356
00:30:30,630 --> 00:30:31,631
[Ajay] Look what I found.
357
00:30:32,924 --> 00:30:34,801
Naman takes the bottle...
358
00:30:35,969 --> 00:30:38,472
uncorks it...
359
00:30:39,473 --> 00:30:42,059
and sniffs it deeply.
360
00:30:44,353 --> 00:30:48,190
A deep, rich and complex nose.
361
00:30:48,732 --> 00:30:50,734
[sniffs]
362
00:30:50,817 --> 00:30:52,819
-Dry orange peel.
-Mmm.
363
00:30:53,945 --> 00:30:55,530
Espresso.
364
00:30:56,198 --> 00:30:59,868
And incandescent notes of Gruyère
and smoked Parma ham.
365
00:30:59,951 --> 00:31:01,828
But you're vegetarian.
366
00:31:07,334 --> 00:31:10,003
I'm married. So...
367
00:31:11,922 --> 00:31:15,133
-You flick, I'll click.
-OK!
368
00:31:22,349 --> 00:31:23,725
I can't do it.
369
00:31:26,937 --> 00:31:29,731
-It's the fault of our caste.
-[burps]
370
00:31:29,815 --> 00:31:31,566
Why are we Brahmans so conservative?
371
00:31:32,567 --> 00:31:36,321
Oh, for a bit of Labour
in these Tory times!
372
00:31:37,072 --> 00:31:39,408
Such a waste!
373
00:31:43,662 --> 00:31:48,333
There is, however,
another course of action.
374
00:31:54,756 --> 00:31:57,926
-[laughter]
-[camera clicking]
375
00:31:58,844 --> 00:32:00,137
[bell tolls]
376
00:32:04,015 --> 00:32:04,975
So!
377
00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:08,728
-Back again from Hyderabad?
-On a plane.
378
00:32:09,479 --> 00:32:11,273
Business class, of course.
379
00:32:11,356 --> 00:32:14,943
There was this, uh... mwah!
...girl next to me.
380
00:32:15,026 --> 00:32:18,530
-So you started feeling her up.
-Why didn't you fuck?
381
00:32:19,656 --> 00:32:21,116
Who said I didn't?
382
00:32:21,867 --> 00:32:23,493
There was this toilet.
383
00:32:23,577 --> 00:32:26,413
-And you joined the mile-high club.
-Coffee, tea or me?
384
00:32:26,496 --> 00:32:29,458
The uninhibited memoirs
of two airline stewardesses.
385
00:32:29,541 --> 00:32:31,084
-Rachel Jones.
-Trudy Baker.
386
00:32:31,168 --> 00:32:35,297
No, no, I used a Pleasure Sutra condom.
387
00:32:37,174 --> 00:32:39,342
-God promise.
-[school bell rings]
388
00:32:44,473 --> 00:32:48,185
Wow, you guys are actually
attending class.
389
00:32:49,519 --> 00:32:52,939
-It's Wednesday.
-Coco-panties day.
390
00:32:53,023 --> 00:32:55,650
What is the color of the color TV?
391
00:32:55,734 --> 00:32:58,778
[humming indistinctly]
392
00:32:58,862 --> 00:33:01,239
[all harmonizing]
393
00:33:04,117 --> 00:33:06,453
[old-timey song plays]
394
00:33:12,918 --> 00:33:14,211
[indistinct chatter]
395
00:33:28,767 --> 00:33:30,769
I say white.
396
00:33:30,852 --> 00:33:33,313
I'm a dirty fellow, so I would say yellow.
397
00:33:33,396 --> 00:33:36,441
-Pink. Think pink.
-Red.
398
00:33:45,534 --> 00:33:49,496
Class. Today, that sonnet without equal.
The esteemed...
399
00:33:49,579 --> 00:33:52,541
"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
400
00:33:52,624 --> 00:33:56,253
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
401
00:33:56,336 --> 00:33:59,631
Rough winds do shake
the darling buds of May,
402
00:33:59,714 --> 00:34:03,385
and summer's lease
hath all too short a date."
403
00:34:03,468 --> 00:34:07,556
And your lease will also expire shortly
if you don't stop that infernal giggling.
404
00:34:09,182 --> 00:34:12,602
In that case, my darling buds of May,
kindly pollinate away.
405
00:34:13,895 --> 00:34:17,607
This is a first.
Ronnie wanting to contribute to a class.
406
00:34:17,691 --> 00:34:20,026
-Speak!
-Or forever hold your piss.
407
00:34:20,110 --> 00:34:22,153
Quiz team, out now.
408
00:34:22,237 --> 00:34:27,659
Sir, by "pollinate away,"
are you asking the girls to eff off?
409
00:34:27,742 --> 00:34:29,494
Your private tuitions are helping.
410
00:34:30,912 --> 00:34:33,456
"Exit stage right, pursued by bear."
411
00:34:33,540 --> 00:34:35,959
[girl] Looks like the cricket team
comes in a package deal.
412
00:34:36,042 --> 00:34:38,128
Good things come in big packages.
413
00:34:38,211 --> 00:34:39,087
[laughter]
414
00:34:39,170 --> 00:34:42,465
You can touch my silly point
with your fine leg any time.
415
00:34:46,428 --> 00:34:49,556
Your middle stump is very long.
416
00:34:49,639 --> 00:34:52,350
The stitches on your balls
seem quite nice.
417
00:34:56,354 --> 00:34:59,482
I'm sure you had
something to do with this. Thanks.
418
00:34:59,566 --> 00:35:02,485
Oh, and uh, enjoy your pocket billiards.
419
00:35:12,037 --> 00:35:13,705
Fucking lounge lizards.
420
00:35:13,830 --> 00:35:16,750
[up-tempo drums]
421
00:35:16,833 --> 00:35:20,003
[men chanting]
♪ Oh, you asshole ♪
422
00:35:20,086 --> 00:35:23,673
♪ Completely loathsome pain in the bum ♪
423
00:35:23,757 --> 00:35:27,260
[indistinct chanting]
424
00:35:27,344 --> 00:35:30,722
♪ Brahman NamanFuck you up ♪
425
00:35:32,182 --> 00:35:35,226
Enough is enough. Let's call Henry.
426
00:35:35,977 --> 00:35:37,896
[car horn]
427
00:35:39,981 --> 00:35:41,650
[honking]
428
00:35:42,067 --> 00:35:44,027
Coming, coming!
429
00:35:45,820 --> 00:35:46,946
Coming.
430
00:35:48,156 --> 00:35:50,075
"Coming, coming."
431
00:35:50,158 --> 00:35:52,535
Save some cum for the bitches! [laughs]
432
00:35:52,619 --> 00:35:55,080
A man and his cum are soon parted.
433
00:35:56,081 --> 00:35:59,209
Something to get us in the mood.
434
00:35:59,292 --> 00:36:01,044
What mood?
435
00:36:01,127 --> 00:36:05,173
All you need is a hooker and a hard-on.
436
00:36:05,256 --> 00:36:06,633
[Henry laughs]
437
00:36:06,716 --> 00:36:09,219
["Alabama Song (Whiskey Bar)"]
438
00:36:09,302 --> 00:36:15,308
♪ Well, show me the wayto the next little girl ♪
439
00:36:15,392 --> 00:36:18,061
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
440
00:36:18,144 --> 00:36:20,605
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
441
00:36:20,689 --> 00:36:25,819
♪ Just show me the wayto the next little girl... ♪
442
00:36:28,822 --> 00:36:31,241
I always like a starter
before the main course.
443
00:36:31,324 --> 00:36:33,284
Best way to start innings.
444
00:36:35,954 --> 00:36:40,125
50 rupees lollipop.
75 rupees mouthwash. 100 rupees full.
445
00:36:40,208 --> 00:36:42,085
Lollipop. Get inside.
446
00:36:47,048 --> 00:36:49,426
No, no, no, stay!
447
00:36:49,509 --> 00:36:52,929
When stadium is full,
batsman always performs better. Come on.
448
00:36:57,642 --> 00:36:58,476
[unzips pants]
449
00:37:01,980 --> 00:37:04,107
[Henry chuckles]
450
00:37:20,832 --> 00:37:22,792
[Henry whimpers]
451
00:37:22,876 --> 00:37:25,211
[yells]
452
00:37:26,463 --> 00:37:28,798
Give me 75 rupees, mouthwash.
453
00:37:29,632 --> 00:37:31,384
Fifty-one secs!
454
00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:51,988
Now, your chance.
455
00:37:53,406 --> 00:37:55,158
[rock music plays nearby]
456
00:37:57,535 --> 00:38:00,163
-This is it, boys.
-Uh, Henry...
457
00:38:00,246 --> 00:38:03,249
Hey! You Brahman boys
have got the guts or no?
458
00:38:03,333 --> 00:38:05,084
Maybe for safety's sake, just a lollipop.
459
00:38:05,168 --> 00:38:07,378
Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome
and all that.
460
00:38:07,462 --> 00:38:09,088
[groans]
461
00:38:09,172 --> 00:38:12,717
Your money, your choice. Come.
462
00:38:16,638 --> 00:38:17,889
[woman moaning]
463
00:38:24,938 --> 00:38:25,939
Uh...
464
00:38:26,022 --> 00:38:32,362
My friends, uh, they want blowjobs,
mouthwash, lollipop.
465
00:38:36,115 --> 00:38:37,826
What friends? Huh?
466
00:38:45,750 --> 00:38:47,585
Uh... Blowjob?
467
00:38:56,344 --> 00:38:57,178
[bleating]
468
00:39:01,891 --> 00:39:03,434
[cow moos]
469
00:39:07,522 --> 00:39:09,399
[man shouts indistinctly]
470
00:39:32,130 --> 00:39:34,173
Did you know
that this area was gerrymandered?
471
00:39:34,257 --> 00:39:35,508
Gerry who?
472
00:39:36,217 --> 00:39:38,595
Named after Massachusetts governor
Elbridge Gerry,
473
00:39:38,678 --> 00:39:40,305
who manipulated his electoral district
474
00:39:40,388 --> 00:39:42,348
so that the people who voted for him
the last time
475
00:39:42,432 --> 00:39:44,309
voted in a block for him the next time.
476
00:39:44,392 --> 00:39:46,477
And cut away the people
who did not vote for him,
477
00:39:46,561 --> 00:39:49,564
-and put them into another district.
-Correct.
478
00:39:50,064 --> 00:39:55,403
They did the same thing here to prevent
the Muslim candidate from winning again,
479
00:39:55,486 --> 00:39:58,615
adding a large Hindu majority block
to dilute the vote.
480
00:39:59,449 --> 00:40:00,950
What?
481
00:40:01,034 --> 00:40:04,370
Right now we could have been
in between the thighs of whores,
482
00:40:04,454 --> 00:40:06,164
losing our virginities.
483
00:40:06,247 --> 00:40:08,625
And here we are trading electoral trivia.
484
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:13,588
That at all we have, Ajay.
485
00:40:15,715 --> 00:40:17,175
Trivia.
486
00:40:19,427 --> 00:40:20,261
Correct.
487
00:40:23,806 --> 00:40:28,353
[man] Rubber On. Set up in the year 1972,
488
00:40:28,436 --> 00:40:33,191
with a dogged determinationto achieve world-class standards,
489
00:40:33,274 --> 00:40:38,196
Rubber On is India's finestrubberized coil mattress.
490
00:40:38,279 --> 00:40:41,366
With technology imported from Austria,
491
00:40:41,449 --> 00:40:45,161
a dedicated workforce of more than 70,
492
00:40:45,244 --> 00:40:50,708
Rubber On strives to be the mattressof copulation to the nation's population.
493
00:40:50,792 --> 00:40:54,921
A mattress that always ensuresa healthy hump,
494
00:40:55,004 --> 00:41:00,259
optimizing orgasm frequencyand facilitating fluid flow.
495
00:41:00,343 --> 00:41:03,179
As is said by the holy Rita,
496
00:41:03,262 --> 00:41:08,559
a bed with the best booby bounceresults in deeper penetration.
497
00:41:08,643 --> 00:41:12,814
Rubbing, rubbing, rubbing.
498
00:41:12,897 --> 00:41:15,900
Who do you think I built upthe businessfor?
499
00:41:18,486 --> 00:41:21,781
After my retirement,
Rubber On will be only for you.
500
00:41:21,864 --> 00:41:23,992
Coffee? Buttermilk?
501
00:41:24,075 --> 00:41:27,078
-Half a cup for me.
-Nothing for me, Ma.
502
00:41:27,161 --> 00:41:31,958
When I was your age, I used to wake up
at 4 a.m., milk the cows,
503
00:41:32,041 --> 00:41:36,921
wake up my brothers, make myself coffee,
have a bath,
504
00:41:37,005 --> 00:41:40,508
then go all the way to the Christian house
to give their children maths tuition.
505
00:41:40,591 --> 00:41:43,803
-Then I would--
-Go to grandfather's accountancy firm.
506
00:41:43,886 --> 00:41:45,388
Tell me something new, Appa.
507
00:41:45,471 --> 00:41:48,683
Hard work was our only ethic.
508
00:41:48,766 --> 00:41:51,144
And here you are drunk every night.
509
00:41:51,227 --> 00:41:53,479
You worked so hard
so that I wouldn't have to, Appa.
510
00:41:53,563 --> 00:41:55,940
Plus I'm paying for my drinks
with my own quizzing money.
511
00:41:56,024 --> 00:41:58,735
Quizzing? What will happen after college?
512
00:41:58,818 --> 00:42:02,697
Will your quizzing feed you
for the rest of your life?
513
00:42:02,780 --> 00:42:06,868
To keep up with the times,
I'm importing new machinery from Austria.
514
00:42:06,951 --> 00:42:09,579
The unique feature
of this main sheeting plant
515
00:42:09,662 --> 00:42:13,499
is that it facilitates
vertical fiber orientation.
516
00:42:13,583 --> 00:42:18,921
A process that results in the deeper
penetration of the latex into the sheet,
517
00:42:19,005 --> 00:42:21,382
making it very classic.
518
00:42:21,466 --> 00:42:25,470
This provides the mattress
with a uniform density throughout
519
00:42:25,553 --> 00:42:28,181
and an extra cushioning effect.
520
00:42:28,264 --> 00:42:32,018
There you have a mattress
that is healthy for your back.
521
00:42:33,352 --> 00:42:36,230
What? Time for another quiz?
522
00:42:36,314 --> 00:42:37,774
Calcutta, Appa.
523
00:42:37,857 --> 00:42:40,151
[Brian reads question]
524
00:42:51,162 --> 00:42:52,705
[Ash] Naman!
525
00:42:55,041 --> 00:42:57,251
-Naman.
-[Naman] What?
526
00:42:58,294 --> 00:43:01,756
I just came to wish you good luck.
And goodbye.
527
00:43:01,839 --> 00:43:06,928
Well, you have.
Therefore, dasvidanya, arrivederci.
528
00:43:08,054 --> 00:43:10,181
Is there anything you need
for the journey?
529
00:43:10,264 --> 00:43:11,516
No.
530
00:43:12,683 --> 00:43:15,603
Actually, yes. Come with me.
531
00:43:17,230 --> 00:43:18,397
Hello, Ash.
532
00:43:27,323 --> 00:43:30,493
Ask for Rita.
It's easy if it's a girl's voice.
533
00:43:33,037 --> 00:43:36,165
Hello. May I speak to Rita, please?
534
00:43:38,709 --> 00:43:40,670
[funky music]
535
00:43:42,046 --> 00:43:42,922
[phone rings]
536
00:43:45,967 --> 00:43:48,094
[ringing continues]
537
00:43:54,809 --> 00:43:57,687
-Hello?
-[Naman] Hello?
538
00:43:58,771 --> 00:43:59,647
Hi, Rita.
539
00:44:02,024 --> 00:44:06,154
-Who's this?
-This is an admirer.
540
00:44:06,237 --> 00:44:07,488
Admirer?
541
00:44:08,698 --> 00:44:10,366
Uh, I sent you that letter.
542
00:44:10,449 --> 00:44:12,285
What letter?
543
00:44:12,368 --> 00:44:15,746
-The one with the perfume.
-[line distorts]
544
00:44:18,124 --> 00:44:19,375
Hello?
545
00:44:19,458 --> 00:44:20,793
Hello?
546
00:44:21,544 --> 00:44:23,796
-Hello?
-Hello? Rita?
547
00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:26,674
-Hello? Are you in a station?
-[trains whistling]
548
00:44:27,466 --> 00:44:28,342
Yes.
549
00:44:29,468 --> 00:44:32,513
Are you coming... or going?
550
00:44:33,139 --> 00:44:35,266
I... I don't know.
551
00:44:35,349 --> 00:44:37,101
[laughs]
552
00:44:38,728 --> 00:44:42,940
Hello? Did you know you're the most
beautiful person on this Earth?
553
00:44:44,150 --> 00:44:45,359
Hello?
554
00:44:45,443 --> 00:44:47,361
Rita, hello? I love you.
555
00:44:49,697 --> 00:44:51,657
[indistinct shout]
556
00:44:57,747 --> 00:44:59,373
-Come on.
-[train whistles]
557
00:45:06,839 --> 00:45:10,343
You made it.
I was going to pull the chain.
558
00:45:10,426 --> 00:45:12,303
What happened to Ramu?
559
00:45:12,386 --> 00:45:15,097
He didn't ask his father for permission.
560
00:45:15,181 --> 00:45:16,933
There goes the fourth member for the quiz.
561
00:45:17,016 --> 00:45:20,686
[man] I may be old, but I'm not dead yet.
562
00:45:20,770 --> 00:45:22,897
According to the rules
of the championship,
563
00:45:22,980 --> 00:45:25,900
your chaperone is allowed
to step into the breach.
564
00:45:26,692 --> 00:45:28,277
[Naman] That's all good, then.
565
00:45:28,361 --> 00:45:31,238
Sir, can we play some music?
566
00:45:31,322 --> 00:45:34,617
-What? Can you repeat the question?
-Can we play some music?
567
00:45:34,700 --> 00:45:38,621
If music be the food of love, play on.
568
00:45:38,704 --> 00:45:41,415
[funky rock music]
569
00:45:50,049 --> 00:45:51,300
[snoring]
570
00:45:54,011 --> 00:45:56,180
[knocking on door]
571
00:45:58,099 --> 00:45:59,850
[switching music off]
572
00:46:01,811 --> 00:46:06,148
What is this noise? The other people
have complained, you know.
573
00:46:06,232 --> 00:46:09,485
Sir, we are young.
Can enjoy only once.
574
00:46:09,568 --> 00:46:12,238
-Maintain decency.
-Definitely, sir.
575
00:46:20,663 --> 00:46:22,331
[music resumes]
576
00:46:39,473 --> 00:46:41,976
[gargles]
577
00:46:43,602 --> 00:46:48,065
[Naman] Padma R, F-18. Naina K, F-18.
578
00:46:48,149 --> 00:46:51,610
These F-18s can bomb my airbase anytime!
579
00:46:51,694 --> 00:46:54,071
[Ajay] Rani P, F-17.
580
00:46:54,155 --> 00:46:56,907
[Randy] Augusta D, F-58.
581
00:46:58,784 --> 00:47:03,831
Unfortunately, here, if I'm not very much
mistaken, are the exhibits themselves.
582
00:47:03,914 --> 00:47:06,876
[Randy] These look one drop kick away
from an arranged marriage.
583
00:47:17,553 --> 00:47:20,639
Sir, why does Madras exist, as a concept?
584
00:47:22,099 --> 00:47:25,853
You know, I have a deathly relationship
with Madras.
585
00:47:25,936 --> 00:47:29,106
The first time I passed through the city,
the chief minister died.
586
00:47:29,190 --> 00:47:30,941
The second time, the governor died.
587
00:47:31,025 --> 00:47:34,195
This time, I hope
the cursed minorities die.
588
00:47:34,904 --> 00:47:37,198
[Naman] Sir, surely that's a bit bigoted.
589
00:47:37,281 --> 00:47:38,657
Bigoted, shigoted.
590
00:47:38,741 --> 00:47:42,161
We Brahmans are the biggest
bigots and racists on this planet.
591
00:47:42,244 --> 00:47:46,207
Why be ashamed of it?
Revel in your supremacy, I say.
592
00:47:46,290 --> 00:47:48,209
Quarter kilo.
593
00:47:51,712 --> 00:47:53,672
-Naman?
-Sir?
594
00:47:53,756 --> 00:47:56,759
-Dig out that gin bottle.
-Huh?
595
00:47:56,842 --> 00:47:59,637
I may be old, but I'm not blind. Yet.
596
00:47:59,720 --> 00:48:02,681
An old man is allowed
to enjoy his drink, too.
597
00:48:02,765 --> 00:48:08,646
Cherry in the gin is cherry on the cake.
598
00:48:08,729 --> 00:48:10,356
[laughs]
599
00:48:12,733 --> 00:48:14,401
Are all of you in your cups?
600
00:48:14,485 --> 00:48:16,862
-Cheese to the bees.
-Cheers to the beers.
601
00:48:16,946 --> 00:48:20,074
-Diamonds are forever.
-Cherries to the berries.
602
00:48:23,619 --> 00:48:27,248
The aspiring chief minister
is not dead yet.
603
00:48:27,331 --> 00:48:29,291
But that can change.
604
00:48:29,917 --> 00:48:33,796
She used to live down my street
when she was a schoolgirl.
605
00:48:33,879 --> 00:48:37,133
The bitch in her green school uniform,
606
00:48:37,216 --> 00:48:42,138
skirt ending just below her panties.
607
00:48:42,221 --> 00:48:44,723
She literally dripped
as she walked along the street.
608
00:48:44,807 --> 00:48:49,854
And the dogs on heat
followed the bitch in heat.
609
00:48:56,152 --> 00:48:57,862
[stammers] Ch-- Ch--
610
00:48:57,945 --> 00:49:00,531
Chrysalis, I believe that's the word
you were struggling for.
611
00:49:01,407 --> 00:49:03,242
[girl] Away from the parental cocoon.
612
00:49:03,325 --> 00:49:07,538
Not to mention the most conservative city
in the world.
613
00:49:08,372 --> 00:49:11,542
-Madras.
-The nympha become butterflies.
614
00:49:11,625 --> 00:49:13,836
Interesting that you use the word
"nympha."
615
00:49:13,919 --> 00:49:17,715
If you're going to flog that old
nymphomaniac joke, forget it.
616
00:49:17,798 --> 00:49:21,552
Be that as it may,
whatever mania you girls subscribe to,
617
00:49:21,635 --> 00:49:24,305
you seem to be of the quizzing persuasion.
618
00:49:24,388 --> 00:49:28,434
You don't need much persuasion
in a Brahman family, sir.
619
00:49:28,517 --> 00:49:32,605
Study, study, study.
Quizzing is good for you.
620
00:49:32,688 --> 00:49:36,317
I mean, who will marry you if you don't
have at least a postgraduate degree?
621
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:39,862
That is correct. Who will indeed?
622
00:49:41,155 --> 00:49:44,158
-Have we seen you in Bangalore quizzes?
-We've seen you.
623
00:49:44,241 --> 00:49:46,785
-We were at the South Zone championship.
-Which we won.
624
00:49:46,869 --> 00:49:48,370
Oh, really, how could you tell?
625
00:49:51,874 --> 00:49:54,752
I'm Randeep... Randy.
626
00:49:55,669 --> 00:49:57,463
Padma. Paddy.
627
00:49:57,546 --> 00:49:59,840
No predictable Irish jokes, please.
628
00:49:59,924 --> 00:50:03,052
I was going for the rice theme. I'm Ajay.
629
00:50:03,969 --> 00:50:06,263
-Rani.
-Yasmin.
630
00:50:06,347 --> 00:50:07,264
Naina.
631
00:50:08,557 --> 00:50:10,434
He's Naman, our team captain.
632
00:50:10,517 --> 00:50:14,688
I have seen Trappist monks
speak more than your team captain.
633
00:50:14,772 --> 00:50:19,568
Forget it. He's in love. With me.
634
00:50:22,905 --> 00:50:24,865
[Naman] Where was she all my wife?
635
00:50:25,991 --> 00:50:27,618
Madras.
636
00:50:30,037 --> 00:50:31,997
You really must be in love.
637
00:50:32,873 --> 00:50:34,375
What makes you say that?
638
00:50:35,251 --> 00:50:38,379
Physical action instead of
a smart verbal comeback.
639
00:50:38,462 --> 00:50:40,256
But what can I do?
640
00:50:41,173 --> 00:50:42,675
Talk to her, maybe.
641
00:50:44,051 --> 00:50:45,511
It's been known to work.
642
00:50:48,222 --> 00:50:50,432
I'm going to try and chat with Paddy.
643
00:50:52,142 --> 00:50:54,603
-How about Rita?
-Who?
644
00:50:54,687 --> 00:50:57,273
[Brian reads question]
645
00:51:03,112 --> 00:51:05,030
[chaperone] So, the essence of my book,
646
00:51:05,114 --> 00:51:08,450
which I am titling
Nostradamus's Inevitable Hinduism,
647
00:51:08,534 --> 00:51:12,997
is that your superstar Christ
was in fact sired by a Roman guard.
648
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:15,749
Tiberius Iulius Abdes Pantera.
649
00:51:15,833 --> 00:51:18,877
-Centurion much higher than a god.
-[woman] How quaint.
650
00:51:18,961 --> 00:51:22,715
Clearly there were traces of
miscegenation in your own family tree,
651
00:51:22,798 --> 00:51:26,760
-hence you're out to taint Christianity.
-No, no, there is proof.
652
00:51:26,844 --> 00:51:31,265
The Greek philosopher Celsus
said so in his work Alethès Lógos.
653
00:51:31,348 --> 00:51:35,144
-Which was refuted by his friend Origen--
-In his eight-volume work Contra Celsum.
654
00:51:37,730 --> 00:51:41,817
Naina, can I have a word with you alone?
655
00:51:44,403 --> 00:51:48,490
No. No mixing with boys.
What would your father say?
656
00:51:48,574 --> 00:51:50,868
Let her go, O Augusta Delphin.
657
00:51:50,951 --> 00:51:56,749
They are typical quiz boys.
Harmless, gutless, feckless.
658
00:51:58,876 --> 00:52:03,714
Clearly your protégés, then,
Bernard Judekumar Irudayarasan.
659
00:52:03,797 --> 00:52:07,676
I'll have you know, Miss Augusta,
that in 1968,
660
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:12,181
when I used to come to your school,
there was not a single...
661
00:52:12,264 --> 00:52:14,141
[train horn blows]
662
00:52:14,224 --> 00:52:16,810
[Naina] Well, none for me?
663
00:52:16,894 --> 00:52:18,979
A beaker full of the warm south.
664
00:52:19,063 --> 00:52:20,939
The blushful Hippocrene.
665
00:52:23,817 --> 00:52:25,569
You know your stuff.
666
00:52:27,029 --> 00:52:28,030
Mmm.
667
00:52:28,113 --> 00:52:30,199
It's a funny thing about knowledge.
668
00:52:30,282 --> 00:52:32,868
It's been known for more than one person
to have it.
669
00:52:32,951 --> 00:52:36,163
-That's not what I meant.
-That is exactly what you meant.
670
00:52:36,246 --> 00:52:39,583
But you didn't say what you meant
when you said that--
671
00:52:39,666 --> 00:52:41,377
That you were in love with me.
672
00:52:42,544 --> 00:52:44,713
It's painfully obvious.
673
00:52:44,797 --> 00:52:51,220
I am good-looking,
smart, female, Brahman,
674
00:52:51,303 --> 00:52:54,223
now imbibing alcoholic libations with you.
675
00:52:54,306 --> 00:52:59,061
I even speak in that funny convoluted way
that quizzers seem to automatically adopt.
676
00:52:59,645 --> 00:53:03,565
And if I were to ask you for that cigar,
you would propose right away.
677
00:53:04,775 --> 00:53:08,237
And I'm not awed
by your quiz-champ status.
678
00:53:11,156 --> 00:53:13,659
You know so much about me. How?
679
00:53:13,742 --> 00:53:15,494
I've seen you onstage.
680
00:53:15,577 --> 00:53:17,246
Admired me from afar.
681
00:53:17,955 --> 00:53:21,708
Seen you onstage. You are a great quizzer.
682
00:53:21,792 --> 00:53:28,590
Brahman fundamentalist, alcoholic,
sexist, et cetera, et cetera.
683
00:53:28,674 --> 00:53:30,300
Thanks.
684
00:53:30,384 --> 00:53:33,303
And only you would take that
as a compliment.
685
00:53:35,055 --> 00:53:39,601
-You still haven't answered.
-I still don't know what the question is.
686
00:53:39,685 --> 00:53:42,563
[train horn blowing]
687
00:53:42,646 --> 00:53:44,898
[Rita] Are you coming or going?
688
00:53:44,982 --> 00:53:46,150
Forget it.
689
00:53:46,233 --> 00:53:47,568
-Brahman family.
-Naman.
690
00:53:47,651 --> 00:53:48,735
-[Naman] Rita?
-Naina.
691
00:53:48,819 --> 00:53:50,612
-[Ajay] She's a Christian, ra.
-No!
692
00:53:52,948 --> 00:53:55,659
[Bernard] And what was worse,
was that I lost a fortune
693
00:53:55,742 --> 00:53:58,454
due to termites getting
into my deposit box.
694
00:53:59,705 --> 00:54:01,457
Sir, what happened?
695
00:54:01,540 --> 00:54:03,584
We're stuck at the Orissa-Bengal border.
696
00:54:03,667 --> 00:54:05,878
The ruling party has called for
a bandh, a general strike.
697
00:54:05,961 --> 00:54:08,380
No movement for the next 12 hours.
698
00:54:12,134 --> 00:54:15,846
-And the reserve, sir?
-I finished it all while you were asleep.
699
00:54:15,929 --> 00:54:17,639
Miss Augusta helped.
700
00:54:18,891 --> 00:54:21,393
And the train has run out of food.
701
00:54:21,477 --> 00:54:23,187
Wake up, bastard.
702
00:54:24,688 --> 00:54:27,483
-[groans]
-Wake up, bastard, wake up.
703
00:54:34,114 --> 00:54:36,617
[traditional Indian guitar song plays]
704
00:55:19,243 --> 00:55:20,327
[Ajay] Nipple.
705
00:55:22,955 --> 00:55:23,914
Aureolae.
706
00:55:29,211 --> 00:55:31,129
[Naman] We need food.
707
00:55:32,172 --> 00:55:33,173
Booze.
708
00:55:34,925 --> 00:55:36,385
[stammers] Train.
709
00:55:37,344 --> 00:55:40,013
[both mimic train]
710
00:55:40,097 --> 00:55:41,306
Stop.
711
00:55:41,390 --> 00:55:43,016
Food, food.
712
00:55:43,100 --> 00:55:44,726
Aah...
713
00:55:45,435 --> 00:55:47,396
And, uh, booze, booze.
714
00:55:47,479 --> 00:55:48,772
Mmm.
715
00:55:55,279 --> 00:55:56,154
Booze.
716
00:55:56,238 --> 00:55:58,615
[chickens clucking, rooster crows]
717
00:56:28,478 --> 00:56:31,106
-[soft overlapping chatter]
-[slow music plays on a radio]
718
00:57:10,228 --> 00:57:12,272
[belches]
719
00:57:13,774 --> 00:57:15,609
Sorry.
720
00:57:15,692 --> 00:57:17,569
In China--
721
00:57:17,653 --> 00:57:22,616
Belching is considered to be a sign
of gratitude and satisfaction. I know.
722
00:57:23,867 --> 00:57:26,787
-Always a step ahead.
-Obviously.
723
00:57:28,372 --> 00:57:34,127
Anyway, I am grateful and satisfied.
Thank you for getting all this.
724
00:57:34,211 --> 00:57:38,757
Well, when one is described
as gutless and harmless--
725
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:41,176
You left out feckless.
726
00:57:41,259 --> 00:57:44,554
James Joyce used the word "feck"
as a synonym for stealing.
727
00:57:44,638 --> 00:57:48,183
In A Portrait of the Artistas a Young Man. Yeah.
728
00:57:49,059 --> 00:57:52,354
-Not bad.
-For a girl?
729
00:57:53,063 --> 00:57:56,400
-No. Not bad per se.
-Oh.
730
00:57:56,483 --> 00:57:59,027
A compliment. Not grudging.
731
00:58:01,488 --> 00:58:07,619
You were right when you said
that I don't really even understand--
732
00:58:07,703 --> 00:58:11,498
-Naman, don't you have a girlfriend?
-Yes.
733
00:58:11,581 --> 00:58:14,710
No. Not yet.
734
00:58:15,669 --> 00:58:18,005
[chuckles] Either way, you're unfaithful.
735
00:58:18,088 --> 00:58:23,427
No doubt you have some twisted
Brahman justification to explain it away.
736
00:58:23,510 --> 00:58:24,803
He does.
737
00:58:24,886 --> 00:58:27,973
Naina, Augusta ma'am says it's bedtime.
738
00:58:28,056 --> 00:58:31,560
-[Naman] The last song on the--
-White Album. Good night.
739
00:58:48,785 --> 00:58:51,121
You realize who Naina is, don't you?
740
00:58:52,539 --> 00:58:53,707
Who?
741
00:58:55,625 --> 00:58:57,085
She's you, Naman.
742
00:58:59,463 --> 00:59:01,214
Female Naman.
743
00:59:04,134 --> 00:59:08,138
So, if you fuck her...
744
00:59:10,265 --> 00:59:12,225
it'll be like fucking yourself.
745
00:59:16,980 --> 00:59:18,857
That makes it homo sex.
746
00:59:18,940 --> 00:59:20,484
[rock music playing]
747
00:59:21,568 --> 00:59:23,320
[chanting]
748
00:59:28,325 --> 00:59:30,243
-[Brian] Good evening, everybody.
-[applause]
749
00:59:30,327 --> 00:59:34,039
How's Calcutta doing today?
How's Calcutta doing today?
750
00:59:34,122 --> 00:59:35,957
-[cheering]
-Very good.
751
00:59:36,041 --> 00:59:39,419
This year is a very special year
752
00:59:39,503 --> 00:59:44,007
because we are celebrating
the 17th anniversary of quizzing in India,
753
00:59:44,091 --> 00:59:46,802
which, as you all know,
began right here in Calcutta.
754
00:59:46,885 --> 00:59:51,056
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Quiz Superstars.
755
00:59:51,681 --> 00:59:55,685
The biggest quiz in India,
and I'm Brian D'Costa.
756
00:59:56,686 --> 00:59:58,396
-Oh, less of brain.
-Yeah.
757
00:59:58,480 --> 01:00:01,566
As usual, we have teams
from all across India,
758
01:00:01,650 --> 01:00:06,571
from Delhi, Bombay, Bangalore, Madras
759
01:00:06,655 --> 01:00:12,285
and, of course,
our very own kollolini Kolkata.
760
01:00:12,369 --> 01:00:14,996
-[cheers and applause]
-I have great news for you.
761
01:00:15,080 --> 01:00:19,376
This year, our sponsors are not only
hosting the outstation teams,
762
01:00:19,459 --> 01:00:23,755
but are also paying for the food
and beverage expenses.
763
01:00:23,839 --> 01:00:27,259
-What did he say?
-He said drinks are on the house.
764
01:00:29,553 --> 01:00:33,431
India has a proud tradition of quizzing.
765
01:00:33,515 --> 01:00:37,435
This is because
we Indians thirst for knowledge...
766
01:00:38,395 --> 01:00:41,815
Hey. How are you? All well?
Good to see you.
767
01:00:41,898 --> 01:00:44,651
[Brian] We Indians also revel
in displaying said knowledge.
768
01:00:44,734 --> 01:00:49,531
Trivia, esoterica, science, technology.
769
01:00:49,614 --> 01:00:53,910
-16 whiskeys, please. On the quiz tab.
-Yes, sir.
770
01:00:53,994 --> 01:00:58,915
...our very lovely scorer for tonight,
Kitty Chatterjee.
771
01:00:59,624 --> 01:01:04,921
You look absolutely gorgeous.
Come on up. Wonderful. Welcome.
772
01:01:05,547 --> 01:01:08,925
Can we have a big round of applause
for Kitty tonight? Thank you.
773
01:01:10,177 --> 01:01:14,514
Thank you so much. All right,
my next question is for Bangalore.
774
01:01:14,598 --> 01:01:16,808
Are you ready for this question?
775
01:01:16,892 --> 01:01:21,771
On Calcutta's suburban trains,
what are the pen sellers called?
776
01:01:21,855 --> 01:01:23,773
Your time starts now.
777
01:01:25,192 --> 01:01:27,777
This is a pass-on round... Yes?
778
01:01:27,861 --> 01:01:31,198
-Lalu-Bhulus.
-That is the right answer.
779
01:01:31,281 --> 01:01:34,367
Big round of applause, please.
Thank you so much.
780
01:01:34,451 --> 01:01:35,952
Kitty, two points for Bangalore.
781
01:01:36,036 --> 01:01:37,704
Delhi, my next question,
782
01:01:37,787 --> 01:01:41,416
who was the cowriter of Layla,
along with Eric Clapton?
783
01:01:41,499 --> 01:01:43,043
George Harrison.
784
01:01:43,126 --> 01:01:47,339
I'm sorry, that's the incorrect answer.
The question now passes to Madras.
785
01:01:47,964 --> 01:01:50,258
-What is the answer?
-Jim Gordon.
786
01:01:50,342 --> 01:01:52,010
Absolutely right! Perfect!
787
01:01:53,303 --> 01:01:58,058
Team Bangalore, which 1942 painting
by Edward Hopper
788
01:01:58,141 --> 01:02:00,727
-depicts people in a downtown--
-Nighthawks.
789
01:02:00,810 --> 01:02:04,606
Perfect. Thank you so much.
Two points for Bangalore.
790
01:02:04,689 --> 01:02:08,652
Calcutta, the nationality
of Christopher Columbus.
791
01:02:08,735 --> 01:02:10,028
[boy] We guess he was Spanish.
792
01:02:10,111 --> 01:02:12,489
I am so sorry,
that's the incorrect answer.
793
01:02:12,572 --> 01:02:15,825
The question now passes to Bangalore.
794
01:02:15,909 --> 01:02:18,286
-Italy.
-Absolutely right.
795
01:02:18,370 --> 01:02:21,248
Bangalore is on a roll tonight.
796
01:02:21,331 --> 01:02:23,250
Who bowled him that first ball?
797
01:02:23,333 --> 01:02:25,919
-Graham McKenzie.
-That is perfectly right.
798
01:02:26,002 --> 01:02:29,547
-All right, Calcutta, what is the answer?
-1911.
799
01:02:29,631 --> 01:02:33,927
Absolutely right. May we have a big round
of applause for Calcutta! Thank you.
800
01:02:34,844 --> 01:02:38,139
This is a first. A tie.
801
01:02:38,223 --> 01:02:40,183
The reigning champions, Calcutta,
802
01:02:40,267 --> 01:02:46,398
and challengers Bangalore
are both tied on 32 points.
803
01:02:46,481 --> 01:02:48,775
As this is a winner-takes-all quiz,
804
01:02:48,858 --> 01:02:52,988
I shall now have to ask
a final tiebreaker question.
805
01:02:53,571 --> 01:02:54,990
Are you ready?
806
01:02:55,907 --> 01:02:59,160
Bangalore, this tiebreaker question
is for you.
807
01:02:59,244 --> 01:03:05,083
What is the American popular slang
for motels run by Indians?
808
01:03:06,001 --> 01:03:09,754
Most US hotels are run by Patels. Potels.
809
01:03:10,588 --> 01:03:11,423
What?
810
01:03:11,506 --> 01:03:13,383
[Brian] Your time is running out,
Bangalore.
811
01:03:13,466 --> 01:03:16,720
-Oh, sorry. Can you repeat the question?
-[Brian] Yes.
812
01:03:16,803 --> 01:03:22,225
What is the American popular slang
for motels run by Indians?
813
01:03:22,309 --> 01:03:26,813
Simple. Potels. Motels run by Patels.
814
01:03:28,690 --> 01:03:31,735
Bangalore, that is the wrong answer.
815
01:03:32,694 --> 01:03:35,280
Calcutta, it's your turn.
816
01:03:35,363 --> 01:03:38,158
I believe the correct answer
would be Patels.
817
01:03:38,241 --> 01:03:42,078
That is absolutely right.
Calcutta have the right answer!
818
01:03:42,162 --> 01:03:44,581
-Calcutta wins again!
-[cheering]
819
01:03:44,664 --> 01:03:46,750
Potels, not Patels,
is the correct answer, sir.
820
01:03:46,833 --> 01:03:51,504
-Potels. Potels, Calcutta, potels.
-It's Patels.
821
01:03:52,714 --> 01:03:55,550
It's a fix. I knew it.
822
01:03:59,137 --> 01:04:01,014
[sound fades]
823
01:04:05,518 --> 01:04:10,940
[echoing] I curse you,
you fucking brainless Brian baboon.
824
01:04:11,024 --> 01:04:12,942
[up-tempo drums]
825
01:04:14,402 --> 01:04:17,322
♪ Oh, you asshole ♪
826
01:04:17,405 --> 01:04:20,825
♪ Completely loathsome pain in the bum ♪
827
01:04:20,909 --> 01:04:24,496
[indistinct chanting]
828
01:04:24,579 --> 01:04:27,749
♪ Brahman NamanFuck you up ♪
829
01:04:27,832 --> 01:04:29,376
[indistinct chatter]
830
01:04:45,725 --> 01:04:48,728
Sorry, Naman. You deserved to win.
831
01:04:48,812 --> 01:04:52,482
-It's a fix. That fucking brainless--
-[man clears his throat]
832
01:04:52,565 --> 01:04:53,775
[Naina] Naman, this is my father.
833
01:04:53,858 --> 01:04:56,611
Sorry, uncle. It's just that--
834
01:04:56,694 --> 01:05:00,448
Whatever the scenario, the use of foul
language is not appropriate, young man.
835
01:05:01,533 --> 01:05:02,909
Sorry, uncle.
836
01:05:02,992 --> 01:05:04,577
What are you studying?
837
01:05:05,954 --> 01:05:09,416
Commerce. St. James, Bangalore, sir.
838
01:05:09,499 --> 01:05:12,669
It's a good college. What are your plans?
839
01:05:12,752 --> 01:05:16,297
-Plans?
-I mean career plans.
840
01:05:16,381 --> 01:05:19,551
You're studying B-com? Hello?
841
01:05:19,634 --> 01:05:21,845
You're studying B-com, next year, MBA?
842
01:05:21,928 --> 01:05:24,431
Sir, I haven't really decided.
843
01:05:25,598 --> 01:05:28,768
Well, that's a problem with today's boys.
844
01:05:28,852 --> 01:05:32,564
Look at my Naina. She's already preparing
for her MBA entrance.
845
01:05:33,314 --> 01:05:34,149
[sighs]
846
01:05:35,233 --> 01:05:38,236
Naina, let me go and check the tickets.
847
01:05:40,822 --> 01:05:44,117
I'm so sorry.
He's not as bad as he sounds.
848
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:47,287
My father asks me the same questions.
[clears throat]
849
01:05:48,663 --> 01:05:52,917
Anyway, what was he saying about
the tickets? Aren't you returning with us?
850
01:05:53,001 --> 01:05:54,919
No. Uh...
851
01:05:55,003 --> 01:05:58,006
We're going to Jamshedpur to see my aunt.
852
01:05:58,089 --> 01:06:01,134
-So when...?
-Who knows?
853
01:06:03,511 --> 01:06:04,721
And us?
854
01:06:04,804 --> 01:06:08,057
Naman, just because a girl spends time
with you on equal terms
855
01:06:08,141 --> 01:06:10,435
doesn't qualify for an "us."
856
01:06:15,607 --> 01:06:16,774
Do you even like me?
857
01:06:19,444 --> 01:06:24,199
You're oddly likable.
Or likable, which is odd.
858
01:06:38,796 --> 01:06:41,424
On the quiz tab.
859
01:06:41,508 --> 01:06:43,301
[laughing]
860
01:06:58,983 --> 01:07:03,196
Naman, if you don't mind,
I have a suggestion.
861
01:07:05,323 --> 01:07:08,034
What can you possibly add
to this wonderful evening?
862
01:07:10,328 --> 01:07:14,707
Why don't you give Rita a call?
She was Plan A, after all.
863
01:07:18,253 --> 01:07:20,797
Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings!
864
01:07:21,923 --> 01:07:23,716
Bloody master.
865
01:07:24,634 --> 01:07:26,928
[rock music plays]
866
01:07:31,099 --> 01:07:32,850
[indistinct chatter over PA]
867
01:07:34,602 --> 01:07:37,063
-Details?
-So...
868
01:07:37,146 --> 01:07:40,692
was Padma aka Paddy a virgin?
Rivers of blood, et cetera?
869
01:07:41,276 --> 01:07:44,404
-We didn't really...
-What? But you were with her all night.
870
01:07:44,487 --> 01:07:48,324
-Actually, we didn't do it.
-Why, bambino? No lead in the old pencil?
871
01:07:48,408 --> 01:07:50,493
No, you didn't let me finish.
872
01:07:50,577 --> 01:07:55,164
I was going to say, actually,
we didn't do it with a condom.
873
01:07:55,248 --> 01:07:56,708
Bareback.
874
01:07:58,251 --> 01:08:00,920
It slipped in smooth with no obstacles.
875
01:08:01,004 --> 01:08:03,172
So who popped it? The milkman?
876
01:08:03,256 --> 01:08:05,842
She said it broke
from excessive cycle riding.
877
01:08:05,925 --> 01:08:08,428
Not from excessive Ajay riding.
878
01:08:10,513 --> 01:08:12,515
I wonder what she'll tell her husband?
879
01:08:12,599 --> 01:08:15,560
I believe hymenoplasty
is an option these days.
880
01:08:16,394 --> 01:08:17,228
Hmm.
881
01:08:29,324 --> 01:08:31,159
[train whistle blows]
882
01:08:42,754 --> 01:08:45,256
[moody electropop music]
883
01:08:50,511 --> 01:08:54,849
-♪ Where did you go? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
884
01:08:54,932 --> 01:08:59,312
-♪ I don't know ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
885
01:08:59,395 --> 01:09:03,024
-♪ I don't know ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
886
01:09:03,107 --> 01:09:07,820
-♪ Where did you go? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
887
01:09:07,904 --> 01:09:12,325
-♪ I am in pain ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
888
01:09:12,408 --> 01:09:16,537
-♪ You were in train ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
889
01:09:16,621 --> 01:09:21,042
-♪ I am in train ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
890
01:09:21,125 --> 01:09:25,421
-♪ Are you in pain? ♪-♪ Ah ♪
891
01:09:25,505 --> 01:09:29,550
-♪ Is this a game? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
892
01:09:29,634 --> 01:09:33,846
-♪ This is a shame ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
893
01:09:33,930 --> 01:09:40,937
♪ This is a game ♪
894
01:09:41,813 --> 01:09:45,108
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪
895
01:09:45,191 --> 01:09:48,152
Quick. Piss her out.
896
01:09:49,320 --> 01:09:51,572
-On the tracks?
-Where else?
897
01:09:53,282 --> 01:09:54,909
[both unzipping pants]
898
01:09:57,829 --> 01:09:59,956
[Brian reads question]
899
01:10:10,800 --> 01:10:13,344
[sultry music]
900
01:11:01,142 --> 01:11:03,311
[moans quietly]
901
01:11:15,531 --> 01:11:18,075
[Rita] Listen, you can't keep
calling me like this.
902
01:11:18,159 --> 01:11:20,161
My parents have been wondering.
903
01:11:20,244 --> 01:11:23,164
And you keep hanging upwhen anybody else picks up.
904
01:11:23,247 --> 01:11:26,083
That's because I want to talk only to you.
905
01:11:27,376 --> 01:11:28,461
Can I call you darling?
906
01:11:29,128 --> 01:11:30,713
Darling Rita.
907
01:11:31,672 --> 01:11:32,507
Hmm.
908
01:11:32,590 --> 01:11:34,509
You're looking beautiful.
909
01:11:34,592 --> 01:11:36,177
-Hello?
-Hello?
910
01:11:36,260 --> 01:11:37,553
Hello.
911
01:11:37,637 --> 01:11:39,764
[Naman] You're looking beautiful.
912
01:11:41,557 --> 01:11:43,059
Hmm...
913
01:11:44,894 --> 01:11:46,395
How do you know?
914
01:11:47,146 --> 01:11:50,149
Because girls look beautiful
when they are angry.
915
01:11:50,233 --> 01:11:53,569
But I don't even know what you look like.
916
01:11:53,653 --> 01:11:56,447
In the fullness of time,
at the appropriate juncture.
917
01:11:56,531 --> 01:11:59,242
-Hello?
-[distorted] At the appropriate juncture.
918
01:11:59,325 --> 01:12:00,785
-Hello?
-I can't-- [static]
919
01:12:00,868 --> 01:12:02,787
Please give me a clue.
920
01:12:02,870 --> 01:12:05,498
I wrote an article in
the St. James' College magazine last year.
921
01:12:06,415 --> 01:12:07,875
-Hello?
-Hello?
922
01:12:07,959 --> 01:12:11,379
-What was it called?
-It was called Depression: A Treatise.
923
01:12:12,672 --> 01:12:15,174
Hello? Rita, hello?
924
01:12:15,258 --> 01:12:16,467
[Rita laughs]
925
01:12:16,551 --> 01:12:18,135
Depression: A Treatise.
926
01:12:19,053 --> 01:12:20,388
Hello?
927
01:12:23,432 --> 01:12:25,810
There you are. I looked everywhere.
928
01:12:25,893 --> 01:12:27,270
What do you want?
929
01:12:27,979 --> 01:12:32,108
-I just heard about Calcutta and--
-You've come to gloat about our defeat.
930
01:12:32,191 --> 01:12:35,486
You know I would never even dream
of anything like that.
931
01:12:35,570 --> 01:12:39,240
Good news, good news, the Lord
is coming, the savior is coming!
932
01:12:39,323 --> 01:12:44,287
-But I am already here.
-No, Lord Jesus Christ is coming.
933
01:12:44,370 --> 01:12:47,331
Austin Town football ground.
7 p.m. Wednesday.
934
01:12:47,415 --> 01:12:48,749
Is he coming in person?
935
01:12:52,295 --> 01:12:53,796
[motorbike approaches]
936
01:12:59,051 --> 01:13:00,803
-This one?
-Yeah.
937
01:13:01,762 --> 01:13:03,598
Are you Naman?
938
01:13:11,689 --> 01:13:13,524
Are you Naman?
939
01:13:14,859 --> 01:13:17,528
Depression: A Treatise indeed.
940
01:13:18,529 --> 01:13:19,989
And do you know what?
941
01:13:20,072 --> 01:13:23,159
The stupid language of your stupid piece
942
01:13:23,242 --> 01:13:26,996
totally matched the stupid language
of your stupid letter.
943
01:13:27,079 --> 01:13:28,080
Stupid!
944
01:13:29,415 --> 01:13:32,627
So you're the one
who's been calling me all this while.
945
01:13:35,212 --> 01:13:38,925
Never ever call me again. Coward.
946
01:13:47,266 --> 01:13:49,602
At least she spoke to you face-to-face.
947
01:13:50,394 --> 01:13:52,229
[rock music]
948
01:13:52,313 --> 01:13:55,483
♪ My baby left me ♪
949
01:13:55,566 --> 01:13:57,443
♪ She was mad ♪
950
01:13:58,444 --> 01:14:01,113
[Ajay] "Never ever call me again.
951
01:14:01,197 --> 01:14:03,699
-Coward."
-Fuckers.
952
01:14:03,783 --> 01:14:05,576
With friends like you, who needs enemas?
953
01:14:05,660 --> 01:14:07,662
This is what I told you in the beginning.
954
01:14:07,745 --> 01:14:10,456
Don't have anything to do with girls.
They are stupid.
955
01:14:10,539 --> 01:14:13,209
How about your fling with Padma
in Calcutta?
956
01:14:14,126 --> 01:14:17,380
The best thing to do is jerk her out.
957
01:14:17,463 --> 01:14:19,924
She'll disappear from your heart
as soon as you cum.
958
01:14:20,007 --> 01:14:21,884
Don't worry, she's probably
an untouchable anyway.
959
01:14:22,969 --> 01:14:25,721
To the victory of sex. Sex is truth.
960
01:14:25,805 --> 01:14:27,932
In vino veritas.
961
01:14:28,015 --> 01:14:30,434
There's truth in alcohol, too.
962
01:14:30,935 --> 01:14:33,229
Forgive me, I lied to you in Calcutta.
963
01:14:33,896 --> 01:14:38,442
At least you got laid, ra.
Padma ain't no Sylvia Kristel, but...
964
01:14:38,526 --> 01:14:39,568
That night after the quiz,
965
01:14:39,652 --> 01:14:42,655
her boyfriend had followed her to Calcutta
to get time alone with her.
966
01:14:42,738 --> 01:14:46,158
Miss Augusta let her go with me
because Bernie told her we were harmless.
967
01:14:46,742 --> 01:14:49,996
I took her to her boyfriend's hotel
and waited while she went upstairs.
968
01:14:50,830 --> 01:14:53,082
She took hours and hours to come back.
969
01:14:53,165 --> 01:14:55,793
-[laughter]
-At least somebody got laid!
970
01:15:02,425 --> 01:15:06,470
Hey. Why chase after Nainas and Ritas
when you have her?
971
01:15:06,554 --> 01:15:08,514
-I wouldn't go there.
-I would.
972
01:15:08,597 --> 01:15:12,977
So what if she's got pimples.
Nice tits, nice arse.
973
01:15:13,060 --> 01:15:15,604
Cover the face, fire the base.
974
01:15:17,565 --> 01:15:21,152
I know I'm not invited here,
but Rita told me what she said to you--
975
01:15:21,235 --> 01:15:24,572
For a change, you aren't gloating.
Take a pew.
976
01:15:29,618 --> 01:15:31,704
♪ Fuck you! ♪
977
01:15:31,787 --> 01:15:34,123
♪ I'll be fine ♪
978
01:15:40,463 --> 01:15:43,841
I want green salad.
979
01:15:43,924 --> 01:15:48,763
-Sorry, sir, kitchen is closed.
-But I want green salad.
980
01:15:54,310 --> 01:15:58,105
-I think you should go home now.
-[Randy] I want green salad.
981
01:15:58,189 --> 01:16:00,900
I want revenge. Bloody leper Rita.
982
01:16:02,735 --> 01:16:04,528
You'll get your revenge, baba.
983
01:16:04,612 --> 01:16:07,615
[Ramu] "If you prick us, do we not bleed?
984
01:16:07,698 --> 01:16:10,284
If you tickle us, do we not laugh?"
985
01:16:10,367 --> 01:16:12,078
"If you poison us, do we not die?"
986
01:16:12,161 --> 01:16:15,790
"If you wrong us, shall we not revenge?"
987
01:16:15,873 --> 01:16:17,249
Shakespeare.
988
01:16:19,043 --> 01:16:21,170
-[Randy] I want...
-Randy!
989
01:16:21,253 --> 01:16:22,671
...green salad.
990
01:16:22,755 --> 01:16:25,716
-[Ramu] Come down. Come down now.
-[Ash] Please, what are you doing?
991
01:16:25,800 --> 01:16:27,635
But I want green fucking salad.
992
01:16:27,718 --> 01:16:29,595
[Ash] Randy, please just come down.
Please.
993
01:16:30,596 --> 01:16:33,682
No green. No women.
994
01:16:35,059 --> 01:16:36,602
No salad.
995
01:16:39,021 --> 01:16:40,397
What's the point in living?
996
01:16:42,483 --> 01:16:44,235
[panicked chatter]
997
01:16:44,318 --> 01:16:46,612
Come down, ra.
Don't make a scene here.
998
01:16:46,695 --> 01:16:48,531
-[Ash] Please, Randy.
-[Naman] Waiter, salad, now.
999
01:16:48,614 --> 01:16:53,410
-[Naman] It's coming.
-This way. Come down, please. Careful.
1000
01:16:55,704 --> 01:16:57,790
There's your green salad.
1001
01:17:20,688 --> 01:17:24,400
Precision... is the key.
1002
01:17:29,864 --> 01:17:33,325
God, what have I created?
1003
01:17:34,827 --> 01:17:36,620
[motorbike engine]
1004
01:17:44,336 --> 01:17:47,923
Watch and learn.
The revenge of the Brahman.
1005
01:17:51,552 --> 01:17:52,803
[whistle blowing]
1006
01:17:52,887 --> 01:17:55,222
-[Ash laughs]
-[rock music plays]
1007
01:18:05,149 --> 01:18:06,817
Where to now?
1008
01:18:07,985 --> 01:18:10,613
You want to see something
you've never seen before?
1009
01:18:11,447 --> 01:18:14,909
Romantic, soft, bouncy.
1010
01:18:16,202 --> 01:18:18,495
I would love to!
1011
01:18:23,250 --> 01:18:26,212
Joseph! Joseph!
1012
01:18:26,295 --> 01:18:30,216
Yaarappa? Sir, you so late.
1013
01:18:30,299 --> 01:18:32,843
Leave the light on, maado,
and go back to bed, understand?
1014
01:18:35,846 --> 01:18:38,015
[Ash laughs]
1015
01:18:42,978 --> 01:18:45,439
-Wow.
-Impressive.
1016
01:18:45,522 --> 01:18:48,400
My father imports these machines
from Austria.
1017
01:18:48,817 --> 01:18:49,860
Really?
1018
01:19:09,922 --> 01:19:12,383
[Ash laughs]
1019
01:19:30,401 --> 01:19:34,488
For madam, the finest
rubberized coir latex
1020
01:19:34,571 --> 01:19:38,158
featuring a fabulous jute hessian
quilted cloth.
1021
01:19:38,242 --> 01:19:39,743
[giggling]
1022
01:19:39,827 --> 01:19:46,667
Or perhaps this one. This one sinks
to make perfect contours for your body.
1023
01:19:46,750 --> 01:19:51,880
Or should I say...
contours for your perfect body?
1024
01:20:03,350 --> 01:20:05,185
I have a surprise for you.
1025
01:20:20,951 --> 01:20:23,579
A Brahman cannot sip
from the same bottle as you.
1026
01:20:24,663 --> 01:20:27,333
Our lips are going to touch anyway.
1027
01:20:27,416 --> 01:20:30,586
Besides, I'm a Brahman, too.
1028
01:20:54,777 --> 01:20:56,570
Ow! Naman!
1029
01:20:58,072 --> 01:21:00,282
Ouch. What are you thinking?
1030
01:21:02,034 --> 01:21:03,410
Sorry.
1031
01:21:04,828 --> 01:21:06,705
How bad is it?
1032
01:21:17,007 --> 01:21:18,509
Ash?
1033
01:21:21,011 --> 01:21:22,930
Cover the face.
1034
01:21:25,391 --> 01:21:27,309
Fire the base.
1035
01:21:45,244 --> 01:21:46,954
[silent mouthing]
1036
01:22:07,558 --> 01:22:10,310
I've waited so long for this, Naman.
1037
01:22:32,666 --> 01:22:34,376
Where are you going, bastard?
1038
01:22:51,560 --> 01:22:55,564
Sorry for you, Naman. Very sorry.
1039
01:22:56,565 --> 01:23:01,987
I came here tonight because I loved you,
despite the constant mocking and...
1040
01:23:02,529 --> 01:23:05,449
underneath I thought
that there was some affection for me.
1041
01:23:06,283 --> 01:23:08,577
I was so wrong.
1042
01:23:08,660 --> 01:23:12,581
Your arrogance is just a front
for your ugliness.
1043
01:23:13,290 --> 01:23:15,709
Yes, Naman, you're ugly.
1044
01:23:22,758 --> 01:23:26,553
Rita was right.
You're nothing but a coward.
1045
01:23:27,804 --> 01:23:31,767
You think because you have all the answers
you're so clever. You don't.
1046
01:23:32,434 --> 01:23:34,102
And you're not.
1047
01:23:34,937 --> 01:23:37,940
Once your cheerleader friends
grow up and see through you,
1048
01:23:38,023 --> 01:23:42,903
you're going to be left all alone
for the rest of your miserable life.
1049
01:24:21,066 --> 01:24:22,609
[starts motor]
1050
01:24:34,621 --> 01:24:35,789
[turns off motor]
1051
01:24:42,087 --> 01:24:45,799
What are you waiting for? Fuck off.
1052
01:24:48,385 --> 01:24:50,929
-It's a long walk back.
-I said, fuck off.
1053
01:24:57,311 --> 01:24:58,645
[revving engine]
1054
01:25:03,400 --> 01:25:05,193
[bike races away]
1055
01:25:23,587 --> 01:25:26,256
[school bell rings]
1056
01:25:46,151 --> 01:25:48,403
-Naman, I--
-The Iriya Samiti,
1057
01:25:48,487 --> 01:25:51,073
the regulation of walking
in Jain scriptures,
1058
01:25:51,156 --> 01:25:54,451
it states that one should walk
looking carefully six feet distance ahead.
1059
01:25:54,534 --> 01:25:57,746
So as not to cause the pain or death
of any living being.
1060
01:25:57,829 --> 01:25:59,790
"I like long walks.
1061
01:26:00,749 --> 01:26:03,710
Especially when they're taken
by people who annoy me."
1062
01:26:08,340 --> 01:26:10,133
[both] Noël Coward.
1063
01:26:15,972 --> 01:26:18,642
-Guess what.
-Hyderabad?
1064
01:26:18,725 --> 01:26:22,437
I was coming back on a coach,
luxury class, of course.
1065
01:26:22,521 --> 01:26:25,857
This sex bomb was in the seat next to me.
1066
01:26:25,941 --> 01:26:27,693
Male or female?
1067
01:26:29,194 --> 01:26:33,198
She fell asleep with her head
on my shoulders so I fiddled it.
1068
01:26:34,324 --> 01:26:36,535
She pretended to stay asleep.
1069
01:26:37,285 --> 01:26:39,788
So I stuck a finger in her pussy...
1070
01:26:40,914 --> 01:26:43,709
[sniffs] ...and I smelled it.
1071
01:26:43,792 --> 01:26:45,335
Did it smell of fish?
1072
01:26:45,419 --> 01:26:49,214
It was heavenly, ra, like your
grandmom's freshly cooked biryani.
1073
01:26:49,297 --> 01:26:52,509
-Veg or non-veg?
-Did you fuck her?
1074
01:26:53,885 --> 01:26:56,304
[Brian reads question]
1075
01:27:02,310 --> 01:27:04,980
-Welcome, Bangalore.
-[cheering]
1076
01:27:05,063 --> 01:27:09,943
Welcome to the finals of the
Annual Sagaya Mary Memorial Quiz.
1077
01:27:11,653 --> 01:27:15,866
Now, before we begin this event,
let me inform you about
1078
01:27:15,949 --> 01:27:22,372
certain shameful shenanigans at the
Quiz Superstars event held in Calcutta.
1079
01:27:22,456 --> 01:27:26,168
Upset at being beaten by a superior team,
1080
01:27:26,251 --> 01:27:32,257
the Bangalore team abused our hospitality
and ran up a bill of 4,000 rupees,
1081
01:27:32,340 --> 01:27:36,595
including two bottles of single malt.
1082
01:27:36,678 --> 01:27:39,973
[cheers and applause]
1083
01:27:40,724 --> 01:27:43,185
[Brian] So this is for you, Naman Bala.
1084
01:27:43,268 --> 01:27:49,941
You and your entire team
are henceforth banned from this quiz.
1085
01:27:50,692 --> 01:27:55,989
If I had my way, from every other quiz.
1086
01:27:56,990 --> 01:28:01,578
Please leave the hall. Now!
1087
01:28:04,080 --> 01:28:05,707
Now.
1088
01:28:05,791 --> 01:28:09,795
Will the other finalists
please come up on stage?
1089
01:28:12,339 --> 01:28:14,049
What the hell are you doing, Naman?
1090
01:28:15,050 --> 01:28:18,220
If this is your apology,
then you're too late for it, trust me.
1091
01:28:20,680 --> 01:28:22,349
[man] Give him a chance, man.
1092
01:28:24,184 --> 01:28:26,228
[quietly] There is a word...
1093
01:28:26,812 --> 01:28:28,063
[microphone feedback]
1094
01:28:28,146 --> 01:28:32,859
There is a word in the English language,
derived from the Latin, of course,
1095
01:28:32,943 --> 01:28:36,738
that is an expression of contrition.
1096
01:28:39,241 --> 01:28:40,700
I have committed an offense.
1097
01:28:41,993 --> 01:28:46,998
And perception of that offense
can compound over time...
1098
01:28:47,999 --> 01:28:49,835
otherwise known as compounding remorse.
1099
01:28:51,086 --> 01:28:54,422
What I am doing here is to compunctulate.
1100
01:28:55,632 --> 01:28:58,677
No, to recompunctulate.
1101
01:29:13,650 --> 01:29:16,027
-I have decided.
-What?
1102
01:29:16,111 --> 01:29:18,446
I'll marry Ash
and make an honest woman out of her.
1103
01:29:18,530 --> 01:29:20,448
Where did that come from?
1104
01:29:20,532 --> 01:29:22,909
If you're looking for context,
young apprentice,
1105
01:29:22,993 --> 01:29:26,413
the events of the last few days
must not have escaped your notice.
1106
01:29:26,496 --> 01:29:27,914
She is Brahman.
1107
01:29:28,957 --> 01:29:32,210
While Ramu here gets ready to get
deflowered by a bull,
1108
01:29:32,294 --> 01:29:37,048
unless he's already lost his hymen to
a milkman or other assorted menial help.
1109
01:29:37,132 --> 01:29:40,760
It was a bull... that broke my foot.
1110
01:29:45,515 --> 01:29:46,808
Where was I?
1111
01:29:46,891 --> 01:29:48,727
Ramu was getting fucked.
1112
01:29:49,561 --> 01:29:53,982
No, I was in Ash, but I will be once
we are joined together in holy matrimony.
1113
01:29:54,065 --> 01:29:55,567
Hi, honchos.
1114
01:29:59,237 --> 01:30:01,698
Coming for alcoholic libations
at the dhaba?
1115
01:30:20,008 --> 01:30:22,302
[hums]
1116
01:30:27,057 --> 01:30:33,146
♪ Oh, show me the wayto the next whiskey bar ♪
1117
01:30:33,229 --> 01:30:35,732
[all] ♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1118
01:30:35,815 --> 01:30:38,610
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1119
01:30:38,693 --> 01:30:43,948
♪ Show me the wayto the next whiskey bar ♪
1120
01:30:44,032 --> 01:30:46,576
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1121
01:30:46,660 --> 01:30:49,204
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1122
01:30:49,287 --> 01:30:54,167
♪ For if we don't findthe next whiskey bar ♪
1123
01:30:54,250 --> 01:30:56,836
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
1124
01:30:56,920 --> 01:30:59,464
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
1125
01:30:59,547 --> 01:31:02,050
♪ I tell youI tell you ♪
1126
01:31:02,133 --> 01:31:04,678
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
1127
01:31:04,761 --> 01:31:07,305
[upbeat instrumental music plays]
1128
01:31:10,016 --> 01:31:13,269
[all humming together]
1129
01:31:14,104 --> 01:31:20,193
♪ Oh, moon of Alabama ♪
1130
01:31:20,276 --> 01:31:25,281
♪ We now must say goodbye ♪
1131
01:31:25,365 --> 01:31:31,579
♪ We've lost our good old mama ♪
1132
01:31:31,663 --> 01:31:36,459
♪ And must have whiskeyOh, you know why ♪
1133
01:31:36,543 --> 01:31:42,340
♪ Oh, moon of Alabama ♪
1134
01:31:42,424 --> 01:31:47,303
♪ We now must say goodbye ♪
1135
01:31:47,387 --> 01:31:53,727
♪ We've lost our good old mama ♪
1136
01:31:53,810 --> 01:31:57,856
♪ And must have whiskeyOh, you know why ♪
1137
01:32:04,362 --> 01:32:10,577
♪ Well, show me the wayto the next little girl ♪
1138
01:32:10,660 --> 01:32:13,246
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1139
01:32:13,329 --> 01:32:15,749
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1140
01:32:15,832 --> 01:32:21,629
♪ Just show me the wayto the next little girl ♪
1141
01:32:21,713 --> 01:32:24,340
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1142
01:32:24,424 --> 01:32:27,051
♪ Oh, don't ask why ♪
1143
01:32:27,135 --> 01:32:32,682
♪ For if we don't findthe next little girl ♪
1144
01:32:32,766 --> 01:32:35,310
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
1145
01:32:35,393 --> 01:32:38,062
♪ I tell you we must die ♪
1146
01:32:38,146 --> 01:32:43,568
♪ I tell you, I tell youI tell you we must die ♪
1147
01:32:48,990 --> 01:32:54,871
♪ Oh, moon of Alabama ♪
1148
01:32:54,954 --> 01:33:00,126
♪ We now must say goodbye ♪
1149
01:33:00,210 --> 01:33:06,132
♪ We've lost our good old mama ♪
1150
01:33:06,216 --> 01:33:11,095
♪ And must have whiskeyOh, you know why ♪
1151
01:33:11,179 --> 01:33:17,018
♪ Oh, moon of Alabama ♪
1152
01:33:17,101 --> 01:33:21,898
♪ We now must say goodbye ♪
1153
01:33:21,981 --> 01:33:28,321
♪ We've lost our good old mama ♪
1154
01:33:28,404 --> 01:33:32,408
♪ And must have whiskeyOh, you know why ♪
1155
01:33:34,911 --> 01:33:38,540
["Where Did You Go?"
by Dr. Jayram & Sriharikuudi]
1156
01:33:52,303 --> 01:33:56,683
-♪ Where did you go? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1157
01:33:56,766 --> 01:34:01,020
-♪ I don't know ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1158
01:34:01,104 --> 01:34:04,941
-♪ I don't know ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1159
01:34:05,024 --> 01:34:09,612
-♪ Where did you go? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1160
01:34:09,696 --> 01:34:14,117
-♪ I am in pain ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1161
01:34:14,200 --> 01:34:18,371
-♪ You were in train ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1162
01:34:18,454 --> 01:34:22,834
-♪ I am in pain ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1163
01:34:22,917 --> 01:34:27,297
-♪ Are you in pain? ♪-♪ Ah ♪
1164
01:34:27,380 --> 01:34:31,634
-♪ Is this a game? ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1165
01:34:31,718 --> 01:34:36,014
-♪ This is a shame ♪-♪ Ah, ah ♪
1166
01:34:36,097 --> 01:34:43,104
♪ This is a game ♪
1167
01:34:43,771 --> 01:34:47,817
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪
1167
01:34:48,305 --> 01:34:54,660
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