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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:31,490 Ohh, you're so good. 2 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,785 Ohh, yes. I am the best, baby. 3 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:37,246 - Oh, yeah! - Oh. Oh, that was a tit. 4 00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:39,706 That is a tit! Yes! 5 00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:41,750 Oh, you're so big! 6 00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:44,586 Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's right, baby. 7 00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:46,880 - Oh, doggie wants to hide his bone. - Yes! 8 00:00:46,922 --> 00:00:49,091 Oh, yeah! I'm bone smugglin', baby. 9 00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:51,260 Man, would you shut up! 10 00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,762 Hey, Jimmy. Just wanted to say sweet dreams. 11 00:00:53,846 --> 00:00:55,764 Yeah, yeah. Sweet dreams. Good night, Mom. 12 00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:59,101 Kiss good night. 13 00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:02,396 - Something wrong with the reception? - Uh, yeah. Yeah. 14 00:01:02,479 --> 00:01:05,107 - There's... There's this nature show that I'm trying to watch. - Take it off. 15 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:09,069 - And the birds are all scrambled and I can't even... - Do me! Yes! 16 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:12,155 Baby! Ride me like a pony! 17 00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:15,659 The thing must be broken or I sat on the remote or something. 18 00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:18,161 - Getting ready for bed, son? - Yup, I'm all set, Dad. I'm all set. 19 00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:21,290 - Yeah? - No! No, I think he's tried to watch some illegal channels. 20 00:01:21,373 --> 00:01:24,334 - Illegal... Illegal channels? - This is just bad reception, honey. 21 00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:26,420 - Oh, spank my hairy ass! - What's that? 22 00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:30,299 - Ooh, baby! - You know what? Here. Just give me this, please... 23 00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:33,177 - Oh, my God! - And let's get this... 24 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:36,972 Okay, okay. Let's, uh... What the hell's the matter with this thing? 25 00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:38,348 Yes! 26 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:38,765 Yes! 27 00:01:49,568 --> 00:01:52,404 Illegal channels? Shit! 28 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,823 If there's any channel that should be illegal, it's that "all-woman's" channel. 29 00:01:54,865 --> 00:01:58,744 - Lifetime supply of pantyhose or some shit. - Yeah. 30 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:01,163 Hey, uh, did you see The Little Mermaid on TV the other night? 31 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:04,208 - No. - Ariel, man. She's so hot! 32 00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:08,253 - She's a mermaid, dude. - Yeah, Oz. But not when she's on land. 33 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:12,883 Come on, Vicky, it's Stifler's party. We got to go. It'll be great. 34 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:16,720 Why? All that happens at Stifler's parties is people get drunk and do it. 35 00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,722 Yeah. 36 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,724 Now, come on, Kevin. Open it. 37 00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:24,061 It's a big, thick envelope, Vicky. You got in. 38 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,313 If you think so, just open it. 39 00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,357 Fine. 40 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:38,992 "Dear Miss Latham: We're sorry but after keeping you on the waiting list... 41 00:02:39,034 --> 00:02:42,579 for the past couple of months, we've decided that you are now rejected." 42 00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:44,623 Shut up! 43 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:49,545 - You got in. - Yes! I love you! 44 00:02:49,628 --> 00:02:52,130 Okay. 45 00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:01,223 Hey, you think I should wear this shirt to Stifler's party? 46 00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:03,809 You've worn that shirt for, like, three days in a row, man! 47 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,894 Guys. She said it. 48 00:03:05,978 --> 00:03:08,355 - Said what? - She said she loves me. 49 00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:10,691 - Holy shit, dude! The "L" word? - Oh, man! 50 00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:13,151 Cornell's not that far from "U" of "M." 51 00:03:13,235 --> 00:03:15,153 Yeah, it's only, like, seven hours. 52 00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,197 Oh, and you get to drive across Canada. 53 00:03:17,239 --> 00:03:21,743 - Beautiful country. - Whatever. It's doable. 54 00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:24,496 Wh-What we should do today, in band. 55 00:03:24,580 --> 00:03:28,417 Instead of playing our instruments regularly, we should play them backwards. 56 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,752 - That'll be so funny! - Yeah. 57 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:39,469 No offense, but you're talking about a post-high school, long-distance relationship. 58 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:41,555 And you and Kevin haven't even done it yet. 59 00:03:41,597 --> 00:03:43,724 That's not why we're going out. 60 00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:47,311 What do you expect him to drive to Cornell for? Milk and cookies? 61 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:49,563 We're gonna have sex when he's ready and I'm ready. 62 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,732 It's got to be completely perfect. 63 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,860 I want the right time, the right moment, the right place... 64 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:57,696 Vicky, it's not a space shuttle launch. It's sex. 65 00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:03,994 - Finch. - Here's the man we are looking for. 66 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,120 - Gentlemen. - What's goin' on, buddy? 67 00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:06,163 - Gentlemen. - What's goin' on, buddy? 68 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,625 - Same ol'... - Finch. You got the Latin homework? 69 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:15,380 Oh. 70 00:04:15,464 --> 00:04:17,966 It means, "My dog ate it." It's Latin. It's a joke. 71 00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:22,387 - It's a Latin joke. - Yeah, Latin. Just drink your coffee. 72 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,723 - No, Jim, it's mochaccino. - What? 73 00:04:24,806 --> 00:04:27,309 What I'm drinking, it's mochaccino. It's not coffee. 74 00:04:27,351 --> 00:04:29,353 'Nova! 75 00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:31,480 What's up, dude? 76 00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:33,732 You comin' to the party tonight, Ozzie, you fuckface? 77 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:36,193 Uh, depends if my date wants to stop by. 78 00:04:36,235 --> 00:04:39,404 - I'm workin' on somethin' new. - I got an idea about something new. 79 00:04:39,488 --> 00:04:41,782 How about you guys actually locate your dicks, 80 00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:44,743 remove the shrink-wrap and fucking use them! 81 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:48,580 Dude, it's gonna happen. She's a college chick. 82 00:04:48,664 --> 00:04:51,083 Oh, right. I'll see you guys tonight. 83 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:54,711 I'll look for you in the no-fucking section. 84 00:04:58,257 --> 00:05:02,219 All right. I'm shooting for a 9:00 E.T.A. beer in hand by five after. 85 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,513 Breath check. 86 00:05:06,098 --> 00:05:09,393 Thank you. 87 00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:18,652 - I wish you wouldn't do that. - So, you got something up your sleeve for tonight? 88 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,572 This is a foolproof plan, my friend. 89 00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:23,657 I have a serious question to ask you guys. Okay. 90 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:27,411 You know Nadia the Czechoslovakian chick? She might be there tonight. 91 00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,705 Now, do you think she would prefer... 92 00:05:31,540 --> 00:05:33,500 Laid-back Jim... 93 00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:36,253 or... 94 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:39,131 Cool, hip Jim? 95 00:05:39,214 --> 00:05:41,216 I don't think it really matters with that shirt you're wearing. 96 00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:44,678 What? Correct me if I'm wrong but you're the one with the girlfriend... 97 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:46,722 and you're still stranded on third base. 98 00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:49,474 Hey, at least I know what third base feels like, okay? 99 00:05:49,558 --> 00:05:52,102 - You're still just a batboy. - Batboy. Batboy. 100 00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:54,104 What are you talking about? 101 00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:56,940 Guys, uh... 102 00:05:57,024 --> 00:06:00,277 What exactly does third base feel like? 103 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,321 You wanna take this one? 104 00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:07,910 - Like warm apple pie. - Yeah? - Yeah. 105 00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:11,246 Apple pie, huh? 106 00:06:11,330 --> 00:06:14,041 McDonald's or homemade? 107 00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:17,711 Gentlemen, destiny awaits. 108 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:22,591 ♪ It's been one week since you looked at me ♪ 109 00:06:22,674 --> 00:06:24,593 ♪ Cocked your head to the side and said, I'm angry ♪ 110 00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:27,345 That's number five and six for the Stif-meister! 111 00:06:27,346 --> 00:06:29,973 Yeah. 112 00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:32,184 Oops! 113 00:06:32,267 --> 00:06:35,103 - Holy! - H-Hey! 114 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:38,815 Nadia! Buenos días. Glad you could make it. 115 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:41,818 I'll be back for you later. 116 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,035 - Another party sultan! - How ya doin'? 117 00:06:50,118 --> 00:06:52,162 Welcome to Stifler's Palace of Love, fellas. 118 00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:55,457 - The keg's back there! Enjoy! - Yeah. 119 00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:58,877 Vicky, Jessica! Great to see you. Glad you could make it. 120 00:06:58,961 --> 00:07:01,213 Haha, bitches! 121 00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:03,298 - Sherman! - Hey! 122 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:05,843 What the fuck are you doin' here? 123 00:07:09,388 --> 00:07:10,764 Fellas! What's goin' on? 124 00:07:10,806 --> 00:07:12,099 Fellas! What's goin' on? 125 00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:15,602 Sherman. Not much. Just, uh, scopin' the babes. 126 00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:19,273 Indeed! Some fine ladies here, boys. 127 00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:22,860 Confidence is high. Repeat. Confidence is high. 128 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:25,320 Sherman is movin' to DEFCON 2. 129 00:07:25,404 --> 00:07:28,740 - Full strategic arsenal ready for deployment. - Hey! 130 00:07:28,824 --> 00:07:30,951 You have somethin' goin' tonight, Sherman? 131 00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:33,161 You see that Central chick, Bernette? 132 00:07:33,245 --> 00:07:34,872 - Um, no. - No. 133 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:38,250 She's around. Seems she's taken a liking to me. 134 00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:43,046 Fellas, it's time she experienced... the Shermanator. 135 00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:45,424 Yeah, okay, Sherman. Whatever. 136 00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:49,553 I'm a sophisticated sex robot sent back through time... 137 00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:53,140 to change the future for one lucky lady. 138 00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:56,643 Go get 'em, tiger. I'll be back! 139 00:07:58,854 --> 00:08:00,814 - Hopeless. - Completely. 140 00:08:00,898 --> 00:08:02,941 - Hi. - Hey, Vic. 141 00:08:03,025 --> 00:08:05,903 Oh, shit. Guys... Guys... 142 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:09,615 There's Nadia and she just looked at me. 143 00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:12,326 - She just looked at me. - Well, why don't you go talk to her? 144 00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:15,954 Yeah. 145 00:08:16,038 --> 00:08:18,499 Yeah, you're right, Kev. I should just go talk to her. 146 00:08:20,626 --> 00:08:22,544 Yeah, I could do that. Sure. 147 00:08:22,628 --> 00:08:26,632 Sure. 148 00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:30,636 Kev? Kev? Ke... 149 00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:41,855 Yeah. Yeah. 150 00:08:43,232 --> 00:08:48,570 ♪ At last ♪ 151 00:08:51,073 --> 00:08:53,450 ♪ My love ♪ 152 00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:56,662 ♪ Has come along ♪ 153 00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:03,126 ♪ My lonely days ♪ 154 00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:07,381 - ♪ Are over ♪ - That's great! 155 00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:11,760 ♪ And life is like a song ♪ 156 00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:17,891 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah ♪ 157 00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:20,185 ♪ At last ♪ 158 00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,522 See ya later. 159 00:09:23,546 --> 00:09:26,174 ♪ The stars above ♪ 160 00:09:31,697 --> 00:09:34,074 We're here for the party. 161 00:09:34,366 --> 00:09:37,286 What party? There's no party. 162 00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:39,580 Party! 163 00:09:41,498 --> 00:09:45,961 Weird. Try the house down the street. 164 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:53,385 So, what's your major? 165 00:09:53,468 --> 00:09:55,554 Post-modern feminist thought. 166 00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:58,974 Oh, cool. Great night, isn't it? 167 00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:02,227 Sure. 168 00:10:02,311 --> 00:10:07,691 Yeah, it's just somethin' about the springtime that's just cool, you know? 169 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:12,196 Like the smell of fresh rain or somethin'. 170 00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,573 Suck me, beautiful. 171 00:10:14,615 --> 00:10:17,159 What did you just say? 172 00:10:17,201 --> 00:10:20,954 Suck me, beautiful. 173 00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:26,210 My friends call me "'Nova," as in Casanova. 174 00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,587 That's pathetic. 175 00:10:29,796 --> 00:10:32,174 Jeez, you don't have to laugh at me. 176 00:10:32,216 --> 00:10:34,218 Well, there's just some things you need to learn, that's all. 177 00:10:34,301 --> 00:10:36,595 - Like what? - Well, you've got to tone it down. 178 00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:38,889 You don't need to come to a place like Lookout Point... 179 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,934 and spout off cheeseball lines to be romantic. 180 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:45,229 - Okay. - You have to pay attention to a girl. 181 00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:49,441 Be sensitive to her feelings. Relationships are reciprocal. 182 00:10:49,525 --> 00:10:53,737 Come on, Casanova. I'll take you back to your friends. 183 00:10:58,784 --> 00:11:03,288 Vicky, think it's time to take the next step in our relationship? 184 00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:07,042 - Tonight? - Yeah, it's such a perfect evening. 185 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:09,545 I mean, it's how you've always pictured it, isn't it? 186 00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:11,755 Damn, my parts fuckin' stink! 187 00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:15,717 Dude, you gotta take a shit! You smell like a Yeti! 188 00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,595 Or not. 189 00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:21,431 Just relax. 190 00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:27,396 You actually said that? 191 00:11:27,479 --> 00:11:30,607 Shut up! 192 00:11:30,691 --> 00:11:32,734 You did a hell of a lot better than I did with Nadia. 193 00:11:32,818 --> 00:11:35,779 Oh, thanks, Jim, that's great. That's really reassuring. 194 00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:38,323 Hey, no problem, 'Nova. 195 00:11:38,407 --> 00:11:42,327 Hey, don't call me 'Nova anymore. I'm a... I'm a fraud. 196 00:11:42,411 --> 00:11:44,830 You guys are pathetic. 197 00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:47,833 I'm gonna find myself a little hottie. 198 00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:51,628 "Suck me, beautiful"! 199 00:11:56,592 --> 00:11:59,178 - Let me know. - Okay. 200 00:11:59,261 --> 00:12:01,597 Keep going. 201 00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,183 I should be able to talk to girls. 202 00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,602 I'm articulate. 203 00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:08,937 You know, I got a 720 on my S.A.T. Verbal. 204 00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:11,231 Bullshit. There's no way. 205 00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:15,194 I kid you not, man. Look. Listen. 206 00:12:15,277 --> 00:12:19,615 Copious. Verisimilitude. 207 00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:22,701 Oh, ohh. Now. 208 00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:35,088 Suck me, beautiful! 209 00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:37,966 - Damn it, Stifler. - Checkout time! 210 00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:43,347 - Please, vacate the room. - You are such a jerk. 211 00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:50,979 God, I can't believe how many cool people are at this party. 212 00:12:51,063 --> 00:12:54,358 Yup. 213 00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:56,693 And you got a keg too! 214 00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:59,613 - Wow! - Indeed. 215 00:13:04,493 --> 00:13:07,746 Oh, wait. I left my beer downstairs. 216 00:13:07,830 --> 00:13:10,249 No. No. Here, babe! 217 00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:13,252 Thanks. 218 00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:16,380 You're really beautiful. Oh... 219 00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:20,092 - Really? - Oh, yeah. 220 00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:37,693 You know what? I don't know if I want to be doing this. 221 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:42,531 - Doing what? - You know, like, if we hook up tonight, 222 00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:45,492 tomorrow I'll just be some girl you go telling all your friends about. 223 00:13:45,576 --> 00:13:48,954 No way! 224 00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:51,957 Steve, you could at least look at me when you say that! 225 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:56,670 Look. Sarah, 226 00:13:56,753 --> 00:14:00,716 I... I wouldn't go telling stories or anything about you. 227 00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:05,387 I promise. So, just... relax, 228 00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:09,683 take it slow... and let the good times roll. 229 00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:15,397 - Okay. - All right. 230 00:14:20,861 --> 00:14:24,114 What's wrong? 231 00:14:25,782 --> 00:14:28,368 What's wrong? What is it? 232 00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:35,542 Xenophobic. 233 00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:40,005 Oh! 234 00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:42,966 - Regurgitation. - I know that one. 235 00:14:44,176 --> 00:14:47,554 - Kevin likes it. - He likes getting head. 236 00:14:47,638 --> 00:14:50,182 Gee, what a total shocker. What about you, Vicky? 237 00:14:50,265 --> 00:14:52,434 I mean, h-have you just never had one with Kevin... 238 00:14:52,518 --> 00:14:54,478 or have you never had one, period? 239 00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:56,897 I've had one. 240 00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:59,191 - I think. - Okay. 241 00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:03,111 That's a no. No wonder you're not psyched about sex. 242 00:15:03,195 --> 00:15:05,113 You tell me you never even had one manually? 243 00:15:05,197 --> 00:15:08,450 - I've never tried it. - You've never double-clicked your mouse? 244 00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:11,662 Ha-ha, nice! 245 00:15:11,703 --> 00:15:14,373 Jesus! Stifler, how much did you drink, man? 246 00:15:14,456 --> 00:15:18,418 Hey, Stifler? How's the pale ale? 247 00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:22,256 - Fuck you! - Ooh, whoo! 248 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:26,426 - That's Stifler's mom? - Yup. 249 00:15:26,510 --> 00:15:31,515 Shit. I cannot believe a fine woman like this produced a guy like Stifler. 250 00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:35,519 - Dude, that chick's a "MILF." - What the hell is that? 251 00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:39,773 - M-I-L-F... Mom I'd like to fuck. - Yeah, dude! 252 00:15:39,815 --> 00:15:41,900 Oh-ho, yeah! 253 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:45,028 - Yeah! MILF! MILF! - Hey, guys... Guys. Guys. 254 00:15:45,112 --> 00:15:48,448 - Come here. - Sherman, what's goin' on? 255 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:52,953 Yeah, uh... Don't you think you fellas could try a little tact? 256 00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:57,791 I got company, if you know what I mean? 257 00:15:59,293 --> 00:16:01,879 She's hot! 258 00:16:04,214 --> 00:16:09,386 If Sherman has sex before I do, I'm gonna be really pissed. 259 00:16:09,428 --> 00:16:14,516 Sherman? The Shermanator? 260 00:16:14,558 --> 00:16:18,020 Come on, man. 261 00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:21,607 MILF! MILF! 262 00:16:21,690 --> 00:16:25,944 MILF! MILF! Dude, hey, dude. What are you doin' to her, dude? 263 00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:29,406 Oh, my God, bro, dude. 264 00:16:29,448 --> 00:16:32,701 Enough of this blow job bullshit. 265 00:16:32,784 --> 00:16:36,455 - I gotta get laid already. - That's nice. Really, really nice. 266 00:16:36,538 --> 00:16:40,292 - Can I have a ride? - Sure. 267 00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:43,837 - Vicky, wait. - Not for you. 268 00:16:43,887 --> 00:16:48,225 Yeti! I am the Yeti! 269 00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:59,269 - Good morning, gentlemen. - Finch. 270 00:16:59,353 --> 00:17:03,273 Where were you last night, huh? What happened to that foolproof plan of yours? 271 00:17:03,315 --> 00:17:06,443 Well, I was going for a fashionably-late entrance and I was too late. 272 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:09,363 So, no ladies left. 273 00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:11,949 It was a very special night, very special. 274 00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:14,618 Guys. Guys. 275 00:17:16,954 --> 00:17:20,958 - I'll never forget this. - Oh, I'll never forget it, either. 276 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:25,462 - Thank you. - Uhh. 277 00:17:25,546 --> 00:17:29,633 - Well, bye. - Bye. 278 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,635 Bye. 279 00:17:33,846 --> 00:17:37,266 Fellas, say good-bye to Chuck Sherman, the boy. 280 00:17:37,349 --> 00:17:40,018 I... am now a man. 281 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:42,771 I highly recommend you join the club. 282 00:17:42,855 --> 00:17:48,193 We were doin' the wild thing... all night. I'm exhausted. 283 00:17:48,277 --> 00:17:51,363 I don't get it. I mean, how the hell did you do that? 284 00:17:51,446 --> 00:17:56,118 It was just my time. It was just my time. 285 00:17:57,536 --> 00:17:59,872 Best of luck to you boys. 286 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:05,335 - I cannot believe this. - Come on, guys. 287 00:18:05,419 --> 00:18:08,130 You know, we should be happy for Sherman. 288 00:18:09,131 --> 00:18:11,675 No, we shouldn't be. 289 00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:14,678 You know, I put in months of quality time with Vicky. 290 00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:17,389 Sherman meets a chick for one night and scores. 291 00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:20,142 - This is just wrong. - No shit. 292 00:18:20,225 --> 00:18:23,687 How the hell am I supposed to become Mr. Sensitive Man? 293 00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:27,441 You know, we're all gonna go to college as virgins. You realize this, right? 294 00:18:27,524 --> 00:18:29,943 I mean, they probably have special dorms for people like us. 295 00:18:30,027 --> 00:18:34,698 All right. I got an idea. But it's got to stay between us. 296 00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:37,326 It's really simple. We just got to make an agreement. 297 00:18:37,367 --> 00:18:39,703 Er, nah. It's... It's more than an agreement. 298 00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:41,914 - What? A bet? - A pact. 299 00:18:41,997 --> 00:18:44,333 No money involved. More important than any bet. 300 00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:48,212 Here's the deal. We all get laid before we graduate. 301 00:18:50,172 --> 00:18:52,716 Dude, it's not like I haven't been trying to get laid. 302 00:18:52,758 --> 00:18:55,552 Think about when you work out, Oz. You gotta have someone there, right? 303 00:18:55,636 --> 00:18:58,180 Someone to spot you. Someone to keep you motivated. 304 00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:00,682 Well, that's exactly what we can do for each other. 305 00:19:00,724 --> 00:19:03,435 I mean, we'll be there to keep each other on track. 306 00:19:03,519 --> 00:19:05,812 Separately, we are flawed and vulnerable, but together, 307 00:19:05,896 --> 00:19:08,023 we are the masters of our sexual destiny. 308 00:19:08,106 --> 00:19:10,025 Their tiger-style kung fu is strong. 309 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,027 But our dragon-style will defeat it. 310 00:19:12,069 --> 00:19:15,614 - Guys! - The Shaolin masters from East and West must unite! 311 00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:18,242 - Fight, and find out who is number one. - Guys! 312 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:23,080 Come on. You're ruining my moment here. This is our very manhood at stake. 313 00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:25,749 We must make a stand, here and now. 314 00:19:27,084 --> 00:19:30,504 No longer will our penises remain flaccid and unused! 315 00:19:30,587 --> 00:19:34,675 We will fight for every man out there who isn't getting laid and should be. 316 00:19:34,758 --> 00:19:38,178 This is our day. This is our time. 317 00:19:38,262 --> 00:19:42,599 And, by God, we will not stand by and watch history condemn us into celibacy. 318 00:19:42,683 --> 00:19:44,643 - Amen. Yes. - I like that. 319 00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:48,605 - We will make a stand. We will succeed. - 'Bout time! 320 00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:51,233 - We will get laid! - Yeah! - Yeah! 321 00:19:53,527 --> 00:19:57,489 Now, the sex: It's got to be valid, consensual sex. 322 00:19:57,573 --> 00:20:00,951 No prostitutes. That's what you're thinkin', Finch. 323 00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:03,495 Busted. 324 00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:06,290 So, basically, prom is our last chance. 325 00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:08,458 - Oh, dude. Prom sucks. - I know, 326 00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:10,669 but you gotta think about it this way. 327 00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:14,631 I mean, all the parties afterwards? The chicks are going to want to do it. 328 00:20:14,673 --> 00:20:18,677 - Yeah-yeah, he's right. It's, like tradition or something. - The Rose Bowl. 329 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:22,973 - So, that gives us... - Exactly three weeks to the day. 330 00:20:24,766 --> 00:20:28,312 - We're gonna do this. - All right, to the next step! - Next step! 331 00:20:28,395 --> 00:20:28,937 Next step! 332 00:20:28,979 --> 00:20:30,814 Next step! 333 00:20:30,856 --> 00:20:35,861 ♪ I have visions I was in them I was lookin' into the mirror ♪ 334 00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:38,864 ♪ To see a little bit clearer ♪ 335 00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:41,366 ♪ The rottenness and evil in me ♪ 336 00:20:43,827 --> 00:20:48,332 ♪ Fingertips have memories I can't forget the curves of your body ♪ 337 00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:51,543 ♪ And when I feel a bit naughty ♪ 338 00:20:51,585 --> 00:20:54,796 ♪ I run it up the flagpole and see ♪ 339 00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:57,132 ♪ Who salutes but no one ever does ♪ 340 00:20:57,174 --> 00:21:00,092 ♪ I'm not sick but I'm not well ♪ 341 00:21:00,093 --> 00:21:02,971 ♪ I'm not sick but I'm not well ♪ 342 00:21:03,013 --> 00:21:06,475 ♪ And I'm so hot ♪ 343 00:21:06,558 --> 00:21:10,187 ♪ 'Cause I'm in hell ♪ 344 00:21:10,229 --> 00:21:14,525 ♪ Been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding ♪ 345 00:21:14,608 --> 00:21:18,403 ♪ The cretins cloning and feeding ♪ 346 00:21:18,445 --> 00:21:21,156 - Well, did you get the flowers? - ♪ And I don't even own a TV ♪ 347 00:21:22,950 --> 00:21:25,619 ♪ Hear the voices in my head I swear to God ♪ 348 00:21:25,702 --> 00:21:28,664 ♪ It sounds like they're snoring ♪ 349 00:21:28,705 --> 00:21:31,583 ♪ But if you're poor and you're boring ♪ 350 00:21:31,625 --> 00:21:34,211 ♪ The agony and the irony ♪ 351 00:21:34,294 --> 00:21:38,006 ♪ They're killing me ♪ 352 00:21:38,048 --> 00:21:42,135 ♪ I'm not sick but I'm not well ♪ 353 00:21:42,219 --> 00:21:45,472 ♪ And I'm so hot ♪ 354 00:21:45,556 --> 00:21:49,268 ♪ 'Cause I'm in hell ♪ 355 00:21:49,309 --> 00:21:51,603 Don't worry. You'll get her back soon enough. 356 00:21:51,687 --> 00:21:53,981 - You think so? - Sure, she likes you. 357 00:21:54,064 --> 00:21:55,107 - Well, I like her too. - Do you love her? 358 00:21:55,148 --> 00:21:56,191 - Well, I like her too. - Do you love her? 359 00:21:56,275 --> 00:22:00,195 Um, you know what? You can't really ask me that. 360 00:22:00,279 --> 00:22:03,282 Well, if you want to get her in the sack, I mean, just tell her you love her. 361 00:22:03,365 --> 00:22:06,285 - That's how I was duped. - Look, Jessica, 362 00:22:06,326 --> 00:22:08,453 I- I don't want to dupe her. 363 00:22:08,537 --> 00:22:12,082 All right. What you need to do... 364 00:22:12,166 --> 00:22:14,334 is learn how to press a girl's buttons. 365 00:22:14,418 --> 00:22:16,336 You have to give her what she's never had. 366 00:22:16,420 --> 00:22:19,798 - What's that? - Let me give you a hint. 367 00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:23,927 Ohh, Kev! Uhh. Yeah. 368 00:22:23,969 --> 00:22:27,097 - Comprende? - You mean an orgasm. 369 00:22:27,181 --> 00:22:29,391 - You got it, stud! - Well, you know, 370 00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:31,602 I'm-I'm pretty sure that I've... given her a... 371 00:22:31,685 --> 00:22:35,647 - No, you haven't. - Well, there was one time... 372 00:22:35,731 --> 00:22:39,193 - No. - Oh, man. 373 00:22:39,276 --> 00:22:44,114 - Look, kid, it's up to you. The big "L" or the big "O." - Dickhead! 374 00:22:44,206 --> 00:22:47,242 - You gotta see this. - ♪ Do you believe in ♪ 375 00:22:47,326 --> 00:22:50,329 ♪ Magic in a young girl's heart Ooh, ooh ♪ 376 00:22:50,412 --> 00:22:53,957 ♪ How the music can free her whenever it starts ♪ 377 00:22:54,041 --> 00:22:57,377 ♪ And it's magic if the music is groovy ♪ 378 00:22:57,461 --> 00:23:01,048 - ♪ It makes you feel happy ♪ - What did you cocks do to him? 379 00:23:01,131 --> 00:23:03,926 ♪ I'll tell you about the magic It'll free your soul ♪ 380 00:23:04,009 --> 00:23:08,347 ♪ But it's like tryin' to tell a stranger 'bout rock 'n' roll ♪ 381 00:23:08,472 --> 00:23:10,641 Great. See you next time. 382 00:23:15,395 --> 00:23:18,357 - Hey, guys. Came to watch me in action? - Yeah. 383 00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:21,109 - I-I think you sounded pretty good. - Yeah, man. 384 00:23:21,193 --> 00:23:23,111 I think you need your balls reattached. 385 00:23:23,153 --> 00:23:26,698 - Hey, keep it down, dude. - What the fuck are you doing here? 386 00:23:26,782 --> 00:23:28,826 This place is an untapped resource. 387 00:23:28,909 --> 00:23:30,911 I mean, check it out. 388 00:23:30,994 --> 00:23:35,582 - These vocal jazz girls are hot. - Why the hell is he joining jazz choir so late? 389 00:23:35,666 --> 00:23:39,378 Maybe he's preparing for another senior year at East? 390 00:23:39,461 --> 00:23:43,507 You guys, we don't even know him. 391 00:23:45,509 --> 00:23:47,427 You dipshit! 392 00:23:47,511 --> 00:23:49,596 You're expecting to score with some... 393 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:51,598 goody-goody choirgirl priss? 394 00:23:51,682 --> 00:23:55,811 These chicks don't know me. I can work the sensitive angle here, fellas! 395 00:23:55,894 --> 00:23:58,105 You know, it's just like that college chick told me. 396 00:23:58,188 --> 00:24:01,233 All that you gotta do is just ask 'em questions... 397 00:24:01,316 --> 00:24:03,277 and listen to what they have to say and shit. 398 00:24:03,360 --> 00:24:07,698 I don't know, man. That sounds like a lot of work! 399 00:24:09,616 --> 00:24:12,870 Uh, just a second! 400 00:24:18,292 --> 00:24:20,419 Come in. Come in. 401 00:24:20,502 --> 00:24:22,546 Oh, Jim, you're here. 402 00:24:22,588 --> 00:24:26,550 Uh, I was just walking by your room and uh... 403 00:24:26,633 --> 00:24:30,679 And, you know, I was thinking, "Boy, it's been a long time since we've had... 404 00:24:30,762 --> 00:24:33,140 a little father-son, uh-uh, chat." 405 00:24:34,516 --> 00:24:38,604 Oh! I almost forgot. I, uh, I bought some magazines. 406 00:24:38,645 --> 00:24:41,940 Do you just want to flip to the center section? 407 00:24:44,234 --> 00:24:46,695 Well, this is the... this is the, uh, female form. 408 00:24:46,778 --> 00:24:49,781 And they have focused on the breasts, 409 00:24:49,865 --> 00:24:54,620 uh, which are used primarily to, uh, feed young infants... 410 00:24:54,703 --> 00:24:59,374 - and, uh... and also, uh, in foreplay. - Right. 411 00:24:59,458 --> 00:25:02,794 This is, uh... This is Hustler. 412 00:25:02,878 --> 00:25:06,632 And this is a much more exotic magazine. 413 00:25:06,673 --> 00:25:11,512 Now, they have decided to focus on the, uh, pubic region... 414 00:25:11,595 --> 00:25:15,432 - Right. - The whole groin area. 415 00:25:15,516 --> 00:25:19,311 Look at the expression on her face. You see that? See what's she's doing? 416 00:25:19,353 --> 00:25:22,439 She's kind of looking right into your eyes saying, 417 00:25:22,523 --> 00:25:26,401 "Hey, big boy. Hey, how ya doin'?" 418 00:25:26,443 --> 00:25:30,280 - You see? - Right. 419 00:25:30,322 --> 00:25:34,451 Shaved is a magazine I'm not too familiar with, 420 00:25:34,493 --> 00:25:38,789 but, again, if you flip to the center... 421 00:25:38,831 --> 00:25:41,291 Section... 422 00:25:41,333 --> 00:25:45,671 Well, you see the detail that, uh, that they go into in this picture here. 423 00:25:45,712 --> 00:25:49,383 - Uh-huh. Yeah. - It almost looks like a tropical plant or something... 424 00:25:49,466 --> 00:25:51,385 - underwater... thing. - Yeah. Yes. 425 00:25:51,468 --> 00:25:53,762 - Do you know what a clitoris is? - Oh, my God. 426 00:25:53,846 --> 00:25:56,014 - Well, don't say, "Oh..." - Yes, I know what a clitoris is. 427 00:25:56,098 --> 00:25:58,225 Oh, you do. Oh, I see. Yes, you do. I forgot you've been there and back. 428 00:25:58,308 --> 00:26:00,269 - You know everything... - I've learned about it in Sex Ed... 429 00:26:00,310 --> 00:26:03,272 - I really don't need you to talk about clitoris. - I'm trying to make this painless... 430 00:26:03,355 --> 00:26:06,024 - You know what? I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry. - No-no-no. 431 00:26:06,108 --> 00:26:09,528 - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - I'm sorry. 432 00:26:09,611 --> 00:26:11,613 I shouldn't have got hot there. 433 00:26:11,697 --> 00:26:13,907 Well, you know what I'm going to do, Jim. 434 00:26:13,991 --> 00:26:15,909 I'm going to just leave these books here... 435 00:26:15,993 --> 00:26:19,496 for you to, uh, peruse at your, uh... at your leisure. 436 00:26:20,372 --> 00:26:23,542 Wait! 437 00:26:27,337 --> 00:26:29,506 Well, safer than a tube sock. 438 00:26:31,592 --> 00:26:35,554 - Okay, that... That was good. - Yeah. 439 00:26:37,097 --> 00:26:41,059 - See you at dinner. - Uh, yeah. I'll see you at dinner. 440 00:26:41,534 --> 00:26:43,645 So, Finch, this is your plan? 441 00:26:43,687 --> 00:26:46,648 You know, I don't think girls are into the whole mini-golf thing. 442 00:26:46,690 --> 00:26:48,775 Kevin, I'm sure that they're not. 443 00:26:48,817 --> 00:26:52,529 Actually, there is one small matter that I need to ask for your cooperation in. 444 00:26:52,613 --> 00:26:55,616 - In the spirit of this whole pact, you know? - Sure, what do you need? 445 00:26:55,699 --> 00:26:58,952 Whatever you hear about me, you agree. And tell all the boys the same thing. 446 00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:02,873 Look, I gotta go. Sixteen minutes round-trip. 447 00:27:02,956 --> 00:27:05,751 You know, Finch, it's... it's senior year. 448 00:27:05,792 --> 00:27:08,170 I mean, don't you think it's time you learned how to take a dump at school? 449 00:27:08,253 --> 00:27:11,590 When was the last time you looked at the facilities in this school? 450 00:27:17,971 --> 00:27:20,724 Excuse me. 451 00:27:20,766 --> 00:27:23,268 Uh, that's Paul Finch, right? 452 00:27:23,352 --> 00:27:26,104 - Yeah. - Well, you've seen him in the locker room, right? 453 00:27:26,188 --> 00:27:31,235 - Uh, yeah. - So, my friends, they want to know. Is it true? 454 00:27:31,318 --> 00:27:34,071 You know, that he's... equipped. 455 00:27:34,154 --> 00:27:38,283 I have no idea. Finch showers with his bathing suit on. 456 00:27:38,367 --> 00:27:40,786 I mean, uh... 457 00:27:40,869 --> 00:27:44,164 As a matter of fact, it is true. The guy's huge! 458 00:27:44,206 --> 00:27:47,334 - Does he have a date for the prom yet? - No, definitely not. 459 00:27:47,376 --> 00:27:49,461 All right. Thanks. 460 00:27:50,838 --> 00:27:53,173 Oh, man! 461 00:27:53,340 --> 00:27:58,428 So I was thinking maybe you could give me some advice, brother to brother. 462 00:27:58,512 --> 00:28:01,139 I thought you might know a trick or somethin' to make her... 463 00:28:01,223 --> 00:28:05,644 - Orgasm? - Yeah. - What's good here? 464 00:28:05,727 --> 00:28:08,021 - Try the spicy tuna hand roll. - What? 465 00:28:08,105 --> 00:28:11,900 - How do you do that? - Hey, never mind that. Listen, pay attention. 466 00:28:11,984 --> 00:28:15,237 Is that all that you're interested in, tryin' to get your girl into bed? 467 00:28:15,279 --> 00:28:18,574 No, it'd be good to be able to, you know, return the favor. 468 00:28:18,615 --> 00:28:21,076 Be nice to know she enjoys things as much as I do. 469 00:28:21,118 --> 00:28:24,413 See that? That's good. That's what I wanted to hear. Now, you qualify. 470 00:28:24,454 --> 00:28:31,003 - Qualify for what? - My man, you've just inherited the Bible. 471 00:28:31,044 --> 00:28:33,547 It originally started as a sex manual, 472 00:28:33,589 --> 00:28:37,009 this book that some guys brought back from Amsterdam. 473 00:28:37,092 --> 00:28:39,720 And each year it got passed on to one East student who was worthy. 474 00:28:39,761 --> 00:28:43,974 Now, it's full of all sorts of stuff that guys have added over the years. 475 00:28:46,393 --> 00:28:51,648 But you have to keep it a secret and return it at the end of the year. 476 00:28:51,690 --> 00:28:55,736 All right. So now you know. Good luck. 477 00:29:02,117 --> 00:29:04,328 ♪ If you believe in magic Ooh, magic ♪ 478 00:29:04,411 --> 00:29:09,583 ♪ Don't you bother to choose if it's jug band music or rhythm and blues ♪ 479 00:29:09,666 --> 00:29:13,003 ♪ Just go and listen It will start with a smile ♪ 480 00:29:13,086 --> 00:29:16,840 ♪ That won't wipe off your face no matter how hard you try ♪ 481 00:29:16,924 --> 00:29:22,471 ♪ Your feet start tappin' and you can't seem to find how you got there ♪ 482 00:29:22,554 --> 00:29:25,265 ♪ Do you believe in magic ♪ 483 00:29:25,307 --> 00:29:30,312 ♪ Scooby-dooby doo bah scoo-scooby-dooby dooby-dooby doo bah ♪ 484 00:29:30,395 --> 00:29:32,648 ♪ Yeah, magic ♪ 485 00:29:32,731 --> 00:29:35,067 What was that? 486 00:29:35,108 --> 00:29:37,694 - Uh, sorry. - No, it was good. 487 00:29:40,113 --> 00:29:43,575 Well, it, uh... It came from the heart. 488 00:29:43,617 --> 00:29:47,579 Well, keep it coming. All right, people, good work! 489 00:29:47,663 --> 00:29:50,332 Now, don't forget. The state competition's a couple of weeks away, 490 00:29:50,374 --> 00:29:53,544 so keep on it, okay? 491 00:30:03,428 --> 00:30:06,098 Not bad, Chris. 492 00:30:06,181 --> 00:30:08,433 Really? 493 00:30:09,518 --> 00:30:11,854 Thanks, uh, Heather, right? 494 00:30:11,937 --> 00:30:13,856 Yeah. 495 00:30:13,939 --> 00:30:16,441 So, you've got this sort of Frank Sinatra thing going on. 496 00:30:16,525 --> 00:30:21,196 Right. I feel like I've discovered this whole new side of me. 497 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:23,782 I mean, uh, music is so expressive. 498 00:30:23,824 --> 00:30:27,494 Okay. I mean, I agree, but... 499 00:30:27,578 --> 00:30:30,622 aren't you supposed to be out, like, trying to decapitate someone... 500 00:30:30,706 --> 00:30:34,710 - with your lacrosse stick or something? - Oh, sure. Sure. 501 00:30:34,793 --> 00:30:36,879 You know, I know what people think. It's like, 502 00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:40,007 "Oz, he's just this kick-ass lacrosse player." 503 00:30:40,090 --> 00:30:42,759 You know, I also play football, by the way, but that's, like, 504 00:30:42,843 --> 00:30:46,263 - that's not all that I am, you know? - Of course, I didn't... 505 00:30:46,305 --> 00:30:50,267 I mean, it really bothers me when people try to pigeonhole me like that. 506 00:30:50,350 --> 00:30:52,311 You? 507 00:30:52,394 --> 00:30:55,230 You think I don't get that? 508 00:30:55,314 --> 00:30:58,692 God, it's like just because I don't get drunk and barf every weekend... 509 00:30:58,734 --> 00:31:03,030 that people say, "Oh, look. There's this Goody Two-Shoes choirgirl priss." 510 00:31:03,071 --> 00:31:07,409 Yeah. So, like, what else do you do? 511 00:31:07,493 --> 00:31:10,829 Well, the same things you do, 512 00:31:10,871 --> 00:31:13,874 like hang out with friends and stuff. 513 00:31:13,916 --> 00:31:16,335 - Why? What do you think I do? - Oh, I... 514 00:31:16,418 --> 00:31:19,421 I just realized that I don't know anything about you. 515 00:31:19,505 --> 00:31:24,635 - I was interested. - Oh, well, what do you want to know? 516 00:31:24,718 --> 00:31:27,596 You know, stuff... about you. 517 00:31:30,098 --> 00:31:32,518 All right. 518 00:31:32,601 --> 00:31:37,105 Mom, I'm home! 519 00:32:33,245 --> 00:32:35,747 Oh, yeah. Oh! 520 00:32:39,001 --> 00:32:43,589 - Jim! - It's not what it looks like. 521 00:32:50,053 --> 00:32:52,347 Well, we'll just tell your mother that, uh... that, uh... 522 00:32:53,265 --> 00:32:55,726 we ate it all. 523 00:33:34,806 --> 00:33:37,184 Goal by number eight, Chris Ostreicher. 524 00:33:41,146 --> 00:33:43,148 - Nice game. - Nice game. Good game. 525 00:33:47,027 --> 00:33:49,988 Hey, what are you doin' here? 526 00:33:50,030 --> 00:33:53,492 Just enjoying my first exhilarating lacrosse experience. 527 00:33:53,534 --> 00:33:56,119 - You kicked butt. - Oh, thanks. 528 00:33:56,161 --> 00:33:59,164 - Um, Chris... - Oh, you can call me Oz, if you want. 529 00:33:59,248 --> 00:34:01,625 - Do I have to? - You can call me Ostreicher. 530 00:34:01,667 --> 00:34:03,836 - What's your middle name? - Nah, forget it. 531 00:34:03,919 --> 00:34:07,464 - Come on. I won't tell anyone. - Well, neither will I. 532 00:34:07,548 --> 00:34:11,176 Okay. Um. 533 00:34:11,260 --> 00:34:14,763 So, I had this thought and... 534 00:34:14,847 --> 00:34:17,099 It may seem like it's way out of left field. 535 00:34:17,182 --> 00:34:21,770 I don't know if you can, but since I'm not going with anybody, I thought that maybe... 536 00:34:21,854 --> 00:34:24,523 Those guys sucked ass! 537 00:34:24,565 --> 00:34:26,775 Choir chick, what the hell are you doing here? 538 00:34:26,859 --> 00:34:31,655 Well, uh, I was asking Chris to prom. 539 00:34:31,738 --> 00:34:33,699 So, do you want to go? 540 00:34:33,782 --> 00:34:37,244 Oh, yeah! That would be great. 541 00:34:37,327 --> 00:34:40,581 Well, just don't expect Oz to pay for the limo! 542 00:34:40,664 --> 00:34:43,709 Stifler, fuck! I mean... 543 00:34:43,792 --> 00:34:48,297 Why do you got to be so insensitive all the time? 544 00:34:48,338 --> 00:34:51,675 What? 545 00:34:51,758 --> 00:34:55,137 Whatever. Look, uh, don't forget. My cottage after prom. 546 00:34:55,220 --> 00:34:57,639 On Lake Michigan. 547 00:34:57,723 --> 00:35:00,225 Hey, wait up, you pussies. Where you goin'? 548 00:35:00,309 --> 00:35:05,647 Ah, well, I gotta... I gotta hit the showers now, 549 00:35:05,731 --> 00:35:09,067 but I think this is gonna be really, really good. 550 00:35:09,109 --> 00:35:13,071 - Yeah. Me too. - All right. 551 00:35:13,113 --> 00:35:15,908 - Bye. - Bye. Bye. 552 00:35:20,662 --> 00:35:24,833 - 'Appenin' Oz! - Working with the choir chick? 553 00:35:24,917 --> 00:35:28,504 What d'ya say, fellas? I just dig those cute little sweaters she wears. 554 00:35:28,587 --> 00:35:32,799 Nuts you do, you little horn dog. 555 00:35:32,883 --> 00:35:35,427 Yeah! Yeah, baby! 556 00:35:35,511 --> 00:35:39,515 Spank me! Spank me! Hit that high "C." 557 00:35:39,598 --> 00:35:41,558 ♪ Ahhhh ♪ 558 00:35:44,895 --> 00:35:47,105 Come on! What's goin' on here? 559 00:35:52,027 --> 00:35:54,905 I was being selfish and majorly insensitive. 560 00:35:54,988 --> 00:35:57,866 I'm a... I'm a total idiot. I mean, a fool, a buffoon. 561 00:35:57,950 --> 00:36:00,452 I think shithead really says it. 562 00:36:00,536 --> 00:36:02,788 You know what? You're right. I'm a shithead, and I want to make it up to you. 563 00:36:02,830 --> 00:36:04,998 You know what? You're right. I'm a shithead, and I want to make it up to you. 564 00:36:05,040 --> 00:36:06,582 Oh, yeah? How? 565 00:36:06,583 --> 00:36:08,085 Oh, yeah? How? 566 00:36:08,335 --> 00:36:11,129 ♪ Don't make me ♪ 567 00:36:11,171 --> 00:36:13,841 - ♪ Over ♪ - Vicky. Your parents are downstairs. 568 00:36:13,924 --> 00:36:17,135 - Kevin, don't stop! - Just a second. 569 00:36:17,219 --> 00:36:20,138 ♪ I'm rockin' steady ♪ 570 00:36:20,222 --> 00:36:23,058 ♪ In demonology ♪ 571 00:36:23,141 --> 00:36:28,397 ♪ Hey so that you could make it ♪ 572 00:36:31,108 --> 00:36:35,279 - ♪ You're really makin' it ♪ - Hon, can you tell Vic to come on down for supper? 573 00:36:35,362 --> 00:36:41,201 - Holy shit! - Shh. You know there's no lock on your door? 574 00:36:46,707 --> 00:36:49,918 Ohh! I'm coming! I'm coming! 575 00:36:54,298 --> 00:36:56,550 - Oh, Jim! - Dad. 576 00:36:56,633 --> 00:36:59,928 Hi, I was just looking at the old family portrait out here. 577 00:37:00,012 --> 00:37:02,681 Well, that was a fun day wasn't it? 578 00:37:02,723 --> 00:37:05,184 - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 579 00:37:05,225 --> 00:37:09,521 Jim, I want to talk about masturbation. 580 00:37:09,813 --> 00:37:14,067 Now, I just want you to know that it's-it's a perfectly normal, uh, thing. 581 00:37:14,151 --> 00:37:16,278 And I have to admit, uh, you know. 582 00:37:16,361 --> 00:37:20,824 I did a fair bit of masturbating when I was a little younger. 583 00:37:20,908 --> 00:37:25,037 I, uh... I used to call it "stroking the salami." 584 00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:27,748 Yeah, you know, "pounding the ol' pud." 585 00:37:27,789 --> 00:37:30,459 I never did it with baked goods. 586 00:37:30,542 --> 00:37:35,047 But you know your Uncle Mort? He "pinched the one-eyed snake" five, six times a day. 587 00:37:35,130 --> 00:37:39,301 See, it's like, uh, practice for the big game. 588 00:37:39,384 --> 00:37:42,513 You see? It's like... It's like... 589 00:37:42,596 --> 00:37:45,474 banging a tennis ball against a brick wall. 590 00:37:45,557 --> 00:37:49,520 Which can be fun. It can be fun, but it's not a game. 591 00:37:49,561 --> 00:37:52,397 - Right. No. - It's not a game. 592 00:37:52,481 --> 00:37:55,901 What you want is you want a partner to return the ball. 593 00:37:55,984 --> 00:37:59,530 - Do you want a partner? - Yeah. Yeah-Yeah, I want a partner. 594 00:37:59,613 --> 00:38:01,532 - You do want a partner? - Oh, I want a partner. 595 00:38:01,573 --> 00:38:05,619 - Want a partner. Good. Good. - Of course. 596 00:38:05,702 --> 00:38:07,579 Good. 597 00:38:07,663 --> 00:38:12,125 So, once Hal becomes king, he has to take on... 598 00:38:12,209 --> 00:38:14,586 the responsibilities of leadership and turn his back... 599 00:38:14,670 --> 00:38:16,964 on his old, drunken friend, Falstaff. 600 00:38:17,005 --> 00:38:21,760 You see, Hal is going through a... rite of passage, much like you all are. 601 00:38:21,844 --> 00:38:25,681 So make most of the time you've got left together. You'll miss it later. 602 00:38:25,764 --> 00:38:28,392 So, does your tongue cramp up? 603 00:38:28,475 --> 00:38:32,563 Nah. You get kind of dizzy, though. 604 00:38:32,646 --> 00:38:36,525 That's amazing. She's probably gonna want to do it soon. 605 00:38:37,818 --> 00:38:41,780 All right. Class dismissed. 606 00:38:44,241 --> 00:38:48,829 Still questing after the Holy Grail, huh, guys? 607 00:38:52,249 --> 00:38:54,251 Hey, uh, where's Finch? 608 00:38:54,334 --> 00:38:56,378 Oh, he went home to take a shit. 609 00:38:56,461 --> 00:38:58,422 I don't get it. I just don't. 610 00:38:58,505 --> 00:39:01,341 How does a guy like that get this sudden reputation? 611 00:39:01,383 --> 00:39:04,887 - What reputation? - Observe. 612 00:39:04,928 --> 00:39:08,932 Ex-Excuse me. Do you know who Paul Finch is? 613 00:39:09,016 --> 00:39:12,394 Yeah! He's the guy with the tattoo, right? 614 00:39:12,436 --> 00:39:18,192 You know, the eagle and the blazing fire and that stuff. 615 00:39:18,275 --> 00:39:22,029 Well, um, if you guys see him later, will you tell him Courtney says hi? 616 00:39:22,112 --> 00:39:24,531 Bye. 617 00:39:24,615 --> 00:39:28,619 Okay. Explain. 618 00:39:28,702 --> 00:39:31,663 I can't. I don't know how he's doing it. 619 00:39:31,705 --> 00:39:35,000 I, uh... I guess that just leaves Jim trailing. 620 00:39:35,083 --> 00:39:37,294 - Aw, Jimbo! - Better sack up, buddy! 621 00:39:37,336 --> 00:39:39,463 Yeah, I know. I'm working on it, all right? 622 00:39:39,546 --> 00:39:41,673 James? 623 00:39:41,757 --> 00:39:43,717 You are very good in the world history class, yes? 624 00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:47,888 Me? Y-Yes. No, uh... 625 00:39:47,930 --> 00:39:51,433 - Yes, I am. - Perhaps you could help me with my studies. 626 00:39:51,475 --> 00:39:53,644 Uh, yeah. Absolutely. 627 00:39:53,727 --> 00:39:55,729 Tha-Tha-Tha... That would be... That would be great sometime. 628 00:39:55,812 --> 00:40:00,400 - How about tomorrow? - Well, I have ballet practice. 629 00:40:00,442 --> 00:40:03,612 Perhaps I could come by your house afterwards? 630 00:40:03,695 --> 00:40:05,948 I could change clothes at your place. 631 00:40:07,574 --> 00:40:11,328 Oh. Uh... yeah. 632 00:40:11,411 --> 00:40:15,374 I suppose that would be okay. Sure. 633 00:40:21,088 --> 00:40:25,884 Nice car! 634 00:40:25,968 --> 00:40:28,387 - I'm glad you think so. - You don't like it? 635 00:40:28,470 --> 00:40:31,807 No, I like the car. By the way, though, about prom? 636 00:40:31,890 --> 00:40:34,893 That was a bad idea. I'm sorry I invited you. 637 00:40:34,935 --> 00:40:37,980 - What are you talkin' about? - Please. 638 00:40:38,021 --> 00:40:41,608 I asked you because I thought you might actually be worth going with. 639 00:40:41,692 --> 00:40:45,320 But you are just a jock. No, wait. You're a jerk. 640 00:40:45,404 --> 00:40:48,323 Wait! I don't understand. 641 00:40:48,407 --> 00:40:51,743 I saw you making fun of me with your lacrosse buddies. 642 00:40:51,827 --> 00:40:53,954 Heather, I wasn't makin' fun of you. 643 00:40:54,037 --> 00:40:56,582 Gimme a break. You're so full of it. 644 00:40:59,793 --> 00:41:04,882 Fuck me! There's gonna be an Eastern European chick naked in your house. 645 00:41:04,965 --> 00:41:07,092 And you're not gonna do anything about that? 646 00:41:07,176 --> 00:41:10,971 What am I gonna do, huh? Broadcast her over the Internet? 647 00:41:11,054 --> 00:41:14,516 - Yeah. - You can do that? 648 00:41:18,437 --> 00:41:22,107 No. I cannot do that to her. 649 00:41:22,191 --> 00:41:25,569 Jim, get some fuckin' balls. 650 00:41:25,652 --> 00:41:30,449 If you don't have the guts to photograph a naked chick, how you gonna sleep with one? 651 00:41:30,532 --> 00:41:33,202 I don't like the kid, but he's got a point. 652 00:41:33,243 --> 00:41:36,497 See, even shit-brick knows you should do it. 653 00:41:36,538 --> 00:41:40,083 All you gotta do is set up some sort of private link or whatever on the 'Net... 654 00:41:40,167 --> 00:41:42,127 and tell me the address. 655 00:41:42,211 --> 00:41:45,005 You can send me the address too. 656 00:41:45,088 --> 00:41:48,008 I'll save you a seat. 657 00:41:48,091 --> 00:41:53,597 ♪ How sweet it is to be loved by you, by you ♪ 658 00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:58,268 - ♪ I needed the shelter of someone's arms ♪ - ♪ Someone's arms ♪ 659 00:41:58,310 --> 00:42:02,147 ♪ There you were You were, oh ♪ 660 00:42:02,231 --> 00:42:06,777 ♪ I needed someone who understands my ups and downs ♪ 661 00:42:06,860 --> 00:42:08,904 ♪ There you were ♪ 662 00:42:08,987 --> 00:42:13,325 Okay, that was good, but I want to thicken-up that solo. 663 00:42:13,408 --> 00:42:15,661 Michigan State is this Saturday, and I want that part to smoke. 664 00:42:15,744 --> 00:42:17,996 Yeah, I know, my timing's off. 665 00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:21,750 No, it's not that. I think it'll work better as a duet with a tenor part. 666 00:42:21,834 --> 00:42:23,794 I'll do it. 667 00:42:25,128 --> 00:42:27,506 - Dick. - I'll do it. 668 00:42:27,589 --> 00:42:29,842 Great. See you tomorrow. 669 00:42:31,510 --> 00:42:33,929 Hmph. 670 00:42:36,682 --> 00:42:39,852 - Why are you doing this? - 'Cause I want to. 671 00:42:39,935 --> 00:42:43,313 Yeah? Well, you can't fake this. 672 00:42:43,355 --> 00:42:46,483 You better practice. 673 00:42:56,785 --> 00:42:58,871 Come in. 674 00:43:00,581 --> 00:43:05,169 Jim? There's a, uh... a young lady here to see you. 675 00:43:05,252 --> 00:43:07,504 - Hey, Nadia. - Hi, James. Ready to study? 676 00:43:07,588 --> 00:43:10,299 Oh, he's always ready to study. He's a real bookworm, this kid. 677 00:43:10,382 --> 00:43:13,886 - Dad. - That means... He's not-not one of those nerdy guys but... 678 00:43:13,969 --> 00:43:18,807 - Dad! - Well, I'll... I'll let you two hit the books. 679 00:43:22,936 --> 00:43:25,981 You want a beer? 680 00:43:26,064 --> 00:43:29,860 - Oh, there we go. - Come on, move! 681 00:43:29,902 --> 00:43:33,989 Steve! It's my computer! And I wanna use it! 682 00:43:34,072 --> 00:43:36,033 Shut up! 683 00:43:36,116 --> 00:43:38,827 Oh, you need to... You need to change, right? 684 00:43:38,911 --> 00:43:41,538 - Uhh, do you mind? - No. N-No, not at all. 685 00:43:41,580 --> 00:43:45,459 Uh, please, you know. Just go ahead and get un... get changed. 686 00:43:45,542 --> 00:43:48,921 I'll, uh... I'll go downstairs and start studying up. 687 00:43:49,004 --> 00:43:50,839 - Yeah. - Okay. 688 00:43:50,881 --> 00:43:53,634 - Oh... - All right, there he goes. 689 00:43:53,717 --> 00:43:54,927 Now, we're in business. 690 00:43:54,968 --> 00:43:56,178 Now, we're in business. 691 00:43:58,263 --> 00:44:00,474 - Back in a sec. - Jimmy, honey, wh... 692 00:44:11,985 --> 00:44:17,032 ♪ He pauses shaving and he tells himself that he is the bomb ♪ 693 00:44:17,115 --> 00:44:21,537 ♪ She has her curlers set, her credit cards are paying the funds ♪ 694 00:44:21,620 --> 00:44:25,082 - ♪ He's not that old I've been told ♪ - Ah, here she is. 695 00:44:26,792 --> 00:44:30,420 - Did I miss anything? - No. You are just in time. 696 00:44:30,462 --> 00:44:33,924 - Oh. Ohh! - This is incredible. 697 00:44:33,966 --> 00:44:36,718 Oh, my God! This is too much. 698 00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:39,763 Oh, did you see? Oh, there that goes. Oh, geez. 699 00:44:39,847 --> 00:44:42,224 God bless the Internet. 700 00:44:42,266 --> 00:44:45,310 - Ai-yi-yi. - Do it. Take it off. 701 00:44:45,394 --> 00:44:47,729 Oh, my God. 702 00:44:47,813 --> 00:44:50,524 Oh, thank you, God, for this wonderful, wonderful day. 703 00:44:50,607 --> 00:44:54,862 - She takes her vitamins. - ♪ And it is way too unhealthy ♪ 704 00:44:54,903 --> 00:44:57,197 ♪ Often they've typically ♪ 705 00:44:57,281 --> 00:44:59,199 Stop hyperventilating. 706 00:45:04,246 --> 00:45:08,917 This is, like, the coolest thing I've ever seen. 707 00:45:09,001 --> 00:45:12,337 I know. 708 00:45:12,379 --> 00:45:15,090 Can you believe... This is definitely one of Stifler's best ideas ever. 709 00:45:16,675 --> 00:45:18,760 What is she... She's touching my stuff. 710 00:45:18,844 --> 00:45:21,471 - Why is she touching my stuff? - Man, let her touch. 711 00:45:21,555 --> 00:45:24,725 - She's going through my stuff! - Nadia can touch anything she wants. 712 00:45:31,023 --> 00:45:34,234 - Oh. - Oh, no. Oh, no. 713 00:45:34,318 --> 00:45:36,778 - No, no. - Oh, nice collection there, Jim. 714 00:45:36,820 --> 00:45:39,490 She's gonna leave. She's definitely gonna... 715 00:45:39,573 --> 00:45:42,242 She's getting comfortable. She's not gonna leave. 716 00:45:42,284 --> 00:45:44,995 She reads the articles. 717 00:45:57,925 --> 00:46:00,219 Is she? 718 00:46:00,260 --> 00:46:04,348 She's goin' downstairs. 719 00:46:13,023 --> 00:46:17,319 - Oh, my God! - Jackpot, baby! 720 00:46:17,361 --> 00:46:20,656 - Can you believe this? - Nadia, I would have never known. 721 00:46:20,739 --> 00:46:23,534 I have an announcement that I would like to make. 722 00:46:23,617 --> 00:46:27,496 There is a gorgeous woman... masturbating on my bed! 723 00:46:27,538 --> 00:46:32,960 - Thank you, Nadia! - If you ever had a chance with Nadia, this is it. 724 00:46:33,043 --> 00:46:37,589 - What am I supposed to do, Kev? - Seduce her. 725 00:46:37,631 --> 00:46:40,759 Wha... What the hell would I say? 726 00:46:40,843 --> 00:46:44,221 Go over there and ask her if she needs an extra hand. 727 00:46:44,304 --> 00:46:48,225 - That's stupid, Kev. I can't... - That's not stupid! You're stupid if you don't go! 728 00:46:48,308 --> 00:46:50,269 Come on! Get over there! 729 00:46:50,310 --> 00:46:52,604 - Get goin', man. She's prime. - Get out of here! 730 00:46:52,646 --> 00:46:55,983 - She's waitin' for you. - Okay, all right. I'm goin'. 731 00:46:56,066 --> 00:46:58,068 - Go! - Go! - I'm goin'! 732 00:46:58,152 --> 00:47:00,070 - Go! Go! Go! Go! - Oh, shit. 733 00:47:08,954 --> 00:47:12,624 ♪ She's open waiting for more ♪ 734 00:47:12,708 --> 00:47:17,171 ♪ And I know he's only lookin' to score ♪ 735 00:47:20,007 --> 00:47:21,925 - ♪ Often they've typically ♪ - Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad. 736 00:47:22,009 --> 00:47:25,637 ♪ Been starved for attention before ♪ 737 00:47:28,015 --> 00:47:30,809 Oh, boy. Oh, God. Oh, crap. Oh, no. 738 00:47:30,893 --> 00:47:34,229 Hello? 739 00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:38,025 - Looks like Jim addressed the e-mail wrong. - What? 740 00:47:38,108 --> 00:47:41,361 It went out to every mailbox in the East High directory. 741 00:47:41,445 --> 00:47:43,447 God, how juvenile. 742 00:47:43,530 --> 00:47:45,449 Hey, hey, hey, guys! 743 00:47:45,532 --> 00:47:50,037 - ♪ Baby ♪ - Check this out! Oh, my God! 744 00:47:52,498 --> 00:47:54,625 Oh. 745 00:47:55,125 --> 00:47:59,922 Please, God, let this be it. 746 00:47:59,963 --> 00:48:02,007 Please? 747 00:48:05,969 --> 00:48:10,641 S- Somebody's goin' in there. 748 00:48:12,100 --> 00:48:14,394 Here you go. That's what you need to do. 749 00:48:14,478 --> 00:48:16,563 - That guy's in my trig class. - Oh, no. 750 00:48:19,149 --> 00:48:22,653 - Looks like you could use an extra hand. - Jim! 751 00:48:22,736 --> 00:48:25,614 - Well... Oh, God. - Shame on you. 752 00:48:25,697 --> 00:48:27,908 Yeah, shame on me. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. 753 00:48:27,950 --> 00:48:30,410 - Uh, you know, I'm just gonna go. - Well, 754 00:48:30,452 --> 00:48:33,789 you have seen me. 755 00:48:33,872 --> 00:48:36,959 Now, it's my turn to see you. 756 00:48:38,502 --> 00:48:41,546 Strip! 757 00:48:41,547 --> 00:48:44,007 - Strip? - Slowly. 758 00:48:44,049 --> 00:48:48,220 Uh, you mean, like, strip strip? 759 00:48:48,303 --> 00:48:51,431 For me. 760 00:48:51,515 --> 00:48:53,642 What is he talkin' to her about? 761 00:48:53,684 --> 00:48:58,605 - Uh, no idea. - Come on, Jim. People are viewing. Get to business. 762 00:49:01,859 --> 00:49:04,361 Perfect! 763 00:49:04,444 --> 00:49:07,906 - Move, James! Move! - Yeah, yeah. Move. 764 00:49:15,956 --> 00:49:18,584 Go, trig boy! It's yer birthday! 765 00:49:29,720 --> 00:49:31,263 - No! No. No. - Please, God. 766 00:49:31,346 --> 00:49:33,724 What's going on? 767 00:49:38,604 --> 00:49:41,732 - Yes! - All right. Get in the mix! 768 00:49:41,815 --> 00:49:44,067 - See there. - Oh, okay. 769 00:49:45,777 --> 00:49:51,241 - This is disgusting. - What the fuck is this? 770 00:49:52,576 --> 00:49:54,870 Cut it out, man! 771 00:49:59,583 --> 00:50:01,668 Yeah. 772 00:50:13,514 --> 00:50:15,807 Freak. 773 00:50:20,020 --> 00:50:22,189 Did not just take out that chair. 774 00:50:22,272 --> 00:50:26,235 - Yup, he took out the chair. - More, more, you bad boy! 775 00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:30,405 Oh, yeah, I'm naughty. I'm naughty, baby. Hyah! 776 00:50:30,489 --> 00:50:33,909 Ohh, God! 777 00:50:33,992 --> 00:50:37,120 ♪ Calling your name ♪ 778 00:50:37,204 --> 00:50:40,249 - ♪ Calling your name ♪ - Now, 779 00:50:40,290 --> 00:50:42,709 come to me. 780 00:50:42,751 --> 00:50:45,379 Oh, yeah. 781 00:50:52,261 --> 00:50:54,304 - Here we go. - He's in, man. 782 00:50:54,388 --> 00:50:56,223 - ♪ Calling ♪ - This just got a hell of a lot better. 783 00:50:56,265 --> 00:51:00,310 - Be gentle. - Okay. 784 00:51:02,020 --> 00:51:04,565 - ♪ Calling your name ♪ - Uh... 785 00:51:04,648 --> 00:51:06,859 - ♪ Calling ♪ - Oh. 786 00:51:06,942 --> 00:51:09,444 ♪ Your name ♪ 787 00:51:09,528 --> 00:51:11,363 Jim? 788 00:51:11,446 --> 00:51:16,160 - Oh! Oh, no. - Oh, no. 789 00:51:16,201 --> 00:51:19,329 - Oh. Ohh! - Liftoff aborted. 790 00:51:19,413 --> 00:51:22,374 Houston, we have a problem. 791 00:51:22,457 --> 00:51:25,836 What happened? What did he do? 792 00:51:25,919 --> 00:51:27,880 He blew it. 793 00:51:27,963 --> 00:51:30,382 I guess I'll be going now. 794 00:51:30,465 --> 00:51:36,013 No, no, no, I'm... I'm not done, Nadia. I've, uh... I've got reserves. 795 00:51:36,096 --> 00:51:38,849 Nadia, please, please. I'm begging you. 796 00:51:38,932 --> 00:51:41,768 Well, I do like your dirty magazines. 797 00:51:41,810 --> 00:51:47,149 You do? Okay. Well. Um. Did-Did... Did you see this one? 798 00:51:47,232 --> 00:51:51,862 This here is your... is your more, uh, exotic, risque magazine. 799 00:51:51,945 --> 00:51:53,947 - He's pullin' out the porn. - He's desperate. 800 00:51:54,031 --> 00:51:55,949 Jim, just wait till she leaves. 801 00:51:56,033 --> 00:51:58,660 Very arousing women. They arouse me... 802 00:51:58,744 --> 00:52:00,704 They arouse me very, very much. 803 00:52:00,746 --> 00:52:04,666 But, uh... But not as arousing as you. 804 00:52:04,750 --> 00:52:08,712 - Oh, Jim! - Oh, God! 805 00:52:13,217 --> 00:52:16,720 Yes! 806 00:52:16,803 --> 00:52:18,931 He's ruining daisy! Whoo! 807 00:52:21,558 --> 00:52:26,063 So, uh, "shaved" is the expression? 808 00:52:29,149 --> 00:52:31,068 Holy shit. 809 00:52:31,151 --> 00:52:34,321 - Holy shit! - Holy shit! 810 00:52:34,404 --> 00:52:37,074 - H-H-Holy shit! - Touch me, Jim. 811 00:52:39,535 --> 00:52:41,620 Here. 812 00:52:41,703 --> 00:52:45,123 Oh. Oh. 813 00:52:45,207 --> 00:52:47,626 - Again? - Not again. 814 00:52:47,709 --> 00:52:50,963 - Not again, man! - Is that possible? 815 00:52:51,004 --> 00:52:52,256 What a loser. 816 00:52:52,297 --> 00:52:53,507 What a loser. 817 00:52:57,135 --> 00:52:58,595 Hey! 818 00:53:19,783 --> 00:53:24,496 ♪ I needed someone to understand my ups and downs ♪ 819 00:53:24,538 --> 00:53:27,749 ♪ There you were ♪ 820 00:53:27,833 --> 00:53:32,671 ♪ With sweet love and devotion ♪ 821 00:53:32,713 --> 00:53:35,257 ♪ Deeply touching my emotion ♪ 822 00:53:35,340 --> 00:53:39,928 ♪ I just wanna stop and thank you, baby ♪ 823 00:53:42,139 --> 00:53:44,558 - Hey, minute man! - Shut up. 824 00:53:44,641 --> 00:53:46,560 You know... You know you're supposed to be supportive. 825 00:53:46,643 --> 00:53:50,939 Hey, you think you still got a chance with Nadia? 826 00:53:50,981 --> 00:53:54,151 No. Her sponsors here saw the thing on the 'Net. 827 00:53:54,234 --> 00:53:56,153 I-I really don't think they liked it. 828 00:53:56,236 --> 00:53:58,405 How do you know that? 829 00:53:58,447 --> 00:54:00,532 She's already on a plane back home. 830 00:54:00,616 --> 00:54:02,576 Yeah. 831 00:54:02,659 --> 00:54:06,413 You know, guys? Maybe I'm just not good with girls, period. 832 00:54:06,497 --> 00:54:10,042 No-no-no, really-really. Like... Like I was born without that part of the brain. 833 00:54:10,083 --> 00:54:12,252 I mean, I can't talk to girls. 834 00:54:12,336 --> 00:54:14,379 And when I do talk to them, I screw it up. 835 00:54:14,463 --> 00:54:17,549 Yeah, well, come prom those excuses aren't going to do you any good. 836 00:54:19,092 --> 00:54:23,013 And one time at band camp, 837 00:54:23,096 --> 00:54:25,307 we weren't supposed to have pillow fights, 838 00:54:25,390 --> 00:54:28,435 but we had a pillow fight, and it was so much fun. 839 00:54:28,519 --> 00:54:33,482 A... And this one time, we all lost our music and we were supposed to play this song, 840 00:54:33,565 --> 00:54:38,821 but we didn't know it, so we just made it up and we kept playing and playing, 841 00:54:38,904 --> 00:54:42,866 and the conductor didn't know what we were doing, and it was so funny. 842 00:54:42,950 --> 00:54:45,369 So, you're pissed about somethin', huh. 843 00:54:45,452 --> 00:54:47,371 You know what I do when I'm angry? 844 00:54:47,454 --> 00:54:50,624 I just play some Bach on my flute. It's so relaxing. 845 00:54:50,666 --> 00:54:53,877 - I learned to do that at band camp. - Hold on, uh... 846 00:54:53,961 --> 00:54:57,297 You have no idea why I'm angry? 847 00:54:57,381 --> 00:55:00,592 Is it because we have a test tomorrow? Sometimes I get cranky... 848 00:55:00,676 --> 00:55:03,929 when I know I have a big test to study for. 849 00:55:03,971 --> 00:55:08,308 - Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty much it. - I thought so... 850 00:55:08,392 --> 00:55:11,103 - because this one time at band camp... - W-What's your name? 851 00:55:11,145 --> 00:55:13,021 - Michelle. - O-Okay. 852 00:55:13,105 --> 00:55:15,065 Michelle, um... 853 00:55:15,149 --> 00:55:17,943 Do you want to be my date for the prom? 854 00:55:18,026 --> 00:55:21,405 Really? You seriously want to go with me? 855 00:55:24,992 --> 00:55:28,120 Yes. Seriously. 856 00:55:28,203 --> 00:55:31,790 Are we going to Steve Stifler's party afterwards? Because that would be so cool. 857 00:55:31,874 --> 00:55:37,212 - Sure, whatever you want. - Cool! We're gonna have such a good time. 858 00:55:37,254 --> 00:55:42,426 It'll be like this one time at band camp when we all had a campfire... 859 00:55:57,191 --> 00:56:00,277 Hi. 860 00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:03,947 - How'd you know I was here? - Stifler told me. 861 00:56:04,031 --> 00:56:07,451 - Talked to Stifler? - Well, I needed to find you. 862 00:56:07,493 --> 00:56:09,620 We're gonna have to work on that song. 863 00:56:10,829 --> 00:56:13,790 Okay. I'm glad you came by. 864 00:56:13,832 --> 00:56:16,084 So you work nights? 865 00:56:18,378 --> 00:56:21,215 - My dad's the manager. - Really? 866 00:56:21,256 --> 00:56:24,343 Cool. Tell him the subs are great. 867 00:56:26,428 --> 00:56:29,306 - So you're going to Michigan next year? - Yeah. 868 00:56:29,389 --> 00:56:32,142 My parents want me to go to Northwestern, but... 869 00:56:32,226 --> 00:56:35,103 I don't wanna write all those extra essays they make you do. 870 00:56:35,145 --> 00:56:40,943 I mean, how am I supposed to know what my "most emotionally significant moment" was? 871 00:56:41,026 --> 00:56:45,572 So when my "U" of "M" acceptance came in December, I just said the hell with it. 872 00:56:45,656 --> 00:56:47,658 - Onions? - What? 873 00:56:47,741 --> 00:56:50,285 You, uh, want onions? 874 00:56:50,369 --> 00:56:52,287 Oh, no, thank you. 875 00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:57,668 So what are you gonna major in? 876 00:56:57,709 --> 00:57:01,797 State's got a good business school, and I could probably walk-on to the lacrosse team. 877 00:57:01,839 --> 00:57:05,759 Well, you've probably got it pretty figured out, then, huh? 878 00:57:05,843 --> 00:57:09,429 I mean, business is okay, and lacrosse is awesome, but... 879 00:57:09,513 --> 00:57:12,599 what am I gonna be, a professional lacrosse player? 880 00:57:12,683 --> 00:57:14,643 I really have no idea. 881 00:57:14,685 --> 00:57:18,063 Thank God. I thought I was the only one. 882 00:57:18,147 --> 00:57:20,065 Well, you're not. 883 00:57:21,525 --> 00:57:23,569 So we're gonna be close next year. 884 00:57:31,535 --> 00:57:33,453 You mean East Lansing and Ann Arbor? 885 00:57:33,537 --> 00:57:36,874 Yeah. 886 00:57:36,957 --> 00:57:38,876 What are you talkin' about? 887 00:57:38,917 --> 00:57:42,963 I can't go to the prom with you. I'm holding out for someone else. 888 00:57:43,046 --> 00:57:45,215 You gotta be fuckin' kidding me. 889 00:57:45,299 --> 00:57:49,678 I know it's a long shot, but I figure Paul Finch might ask me. 890 00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:53,765 Finch. Shit-brick. 891 00:57:53,849 --> 00:57:56,518 Oh, gosh. I-I forgot. 892 00:57:56,602 --> 00:57:59,021 You look okay. 893 00:57:59,104 --> 00:58:02,608 I-I mean, the scars healed really well. 894 00:58:02,691 --> 00:58:04,610 - Hey, Stifler. - Eat shit. 895 00:58:07,446 --> 00:58:09,406 What was that all about? 896 00:58:09,490 --> 00:58:13,869 - He's still embarrassed because Finch kicked his ass. - Who told you that? 897 00:58:13,952 --> 00:58:16,121 What do you mean, "no comment"? 898 00:58:16,163 --> 00:58:19,249 - Did you two hook up or something? - What, are you kidding? No. 899 00:58:19,333 --> 00:58:22,878 Then how did all this get started? 900 00:58:22,961 --> 00:58:26,173 Well, I guess it's all right for me to tell you now. 901 00:58:26,256 --> 00:58:29,426 That reputation of his isn't going anywhere. Cheese, please. 902 00:58:29,510 --> 00:58:32,471 Finch comes up to me and says, "Jessica, 903 00:58:32,554 --> 00:58:35,182 I need your help with this, blah, blah, etcetera." 904 00:58:35,265 --> 00:58:37,601 So I said, "All right. Pay me 200 bucks, 905 00:58:37,684 --> 00:58:40,562 and I'll tell a couple of girls that you're dynamite in bed." 906 00:58:40,604 --> 00:58:43,398 So he did, and I did. 907 00:58:43,440 --> 00:58:45,526 - That actually works? - Well, duh! Of course. 908 00:58:45,609 --> 00:58:48,153 Naturally, I embellished a little bit. 909 00:58:48,195 --> 00:58:50,697 Did you hear that Finch had an affair with an older woman? 910 00:58:50,781 --> 00:58:52,741 No, I didn't hear that one. 911 00:58:52,783 --> 00:58:55,369 That one was my favorite. 912 00:58:55,452 --> 00:58:57,454 Do that cheerleader. 913 00:58:57,538 --> 00:59:01,041 - ♪ Thank you, baby ♪ - She wants me. She calls me up... 914 00:59:01,124 --> 00:59:05,587 ♪ How sweet it is to be loved by you ♪ 915 00:59:05,671 --> 00:59:08,799 Oh, my God, you're gay! 916 00:59:08,882 --> 00:59:10,801 Sing it with me. You know the words. 917 00:59:10,884 --> 00:59:14,096 No, thanks, man. You've been singin' that shit all week. 918 00:59:14,179 --> 00:59:17,850 If you try that at M.S.U. This Saturday, I'll kick your ass. 919 00:59:17,933 --> 00:59:19,935 Our last game is this Saturday. 920 00:59:20,018 --> 00:59:22,146 Yeah, well, shit. 921 00:59:25,065 --> 00:59:29,111 I've got this lacrosse game. It's really important. It's our last game. 922 00:59:29,194 --> 00:59:32,948 Central almost beat us last time, so this time I really wanna kick their ass. 923 00:59:33,073 --> 00:59:35,784 But it's gonna be cool, because the game's at State, 924 00:59:35,868 --> 00:59:38,453 which means afterwards I'll be able to stop by. 925 00:59:38,495 --> 00:59:40,497 So you can't sing at the competition. 926 00:59:40,581 --> 00:59:43,292 Heather, I'm sorry. I totally blew it. 927 00:59:43,375 --> 00:59:48,088 It's okay. You should... do what makes you happy. 928 00:59:49,715 --> 00:59:53,427 All right. Listen, thanks for understanding. 929 00:59:53,510 --> 00:59:56,013 Yeah. 930 00:59:56,054 --> 00:59:59,099 So, uh, I guess I'll see you later? 931 01:00:13,864 --> 01:00:17,034 Hey, Kevin. 932 01:00:17,117 --> 01:00:22,164 - You seen shit-brick lately? - Why? What did you do to him? 933 01:00:22,206 --> 01:00:24,333 Me? Nothing. 934 01:00:24,374 --> 01:00:26,668 See, I'm the one whose ass he kicked. 935 01:00:26,752 --> 01:00:30,214 But, uh, I'll tell you one thing, though. 936 01:00:30,297 --> 01:00:33,509 I don't think he's gonna have a problem shitting in school anymore. 937 01:00:33,592 --> 01:00:35,594 Slipped a little something into his mochaccino. 938 01:00:38,055 --> 01:00:40,724 Oh, God! 939 01:00:41,809 --> 01:00:43,936 Oh! Oh! 940 01:00:50,150 --> 01:00:52,444 Jesus. 941 01:00:52,486 --> 01:00:55,030 Right this way, sir. 942 01:01:00,452 --> 01:01:04,373 Oh, God. 943 01:01:32,192 --> 01:01:35,154 Oh, no. 944 01:01:35,529 --> 01:01:37,698 It's gonna be fun. 945 01:01:37,781 --> 01:01:40,325 You know it's just gonna be some crappy band and stupid decorations. 946 01:01:40,409 --> 01:01:44,037 You're just saying that because prom's a week away and you don't have a date. 947 01:01:44,121 --> 01:01:46,582 No, no, no. I don't want a date. 948 01:01:46,665 --> 01:01:51,170 Finch is goin' stag and... so am I. 949 01:01:51,253 --> 01:01:54,506 God, he's like so... refined. 950 01:01:54,590 --> 01:01:57,759 You think that older woman thing is true? 951 01:01:57,801 --> 01:02:01,138 Yeah, it's true. It was Stifler's mom. 952 01:02:03,182 --> 01:02:06,518 Joanie, was that you? 953 01:02:06,602 --> 01:02:08,896 - Oh! - Can't hold it. 954 01:02:08,937 --> 01:02:11,982 Oh! 955 01:02:15,944 --> 01:02:18,030 Eww! 956 01:02:40,719 --> 01:02:44,973 Yeah! 957 01:02:45,057 --> 01:02:48,018 Kev? I think we've come... 958 01:02:48,060 --> 01:02:51,647 - a really long way since homecoming. - Yeah, we have. 959 01:02:51,730 --> 01:02:53,649 Maybe it's time... 960 01:02:53,732 --> 01:02:57,694 we start to express ourselves in new ways. 961 01:02:57,778 --> 01:03:00,030 - Yeah. - You wanna do it? 962 01:03:00,113 --> 01:03:02,908 - Yeah. - I love you. 963 01:03:04,618 --> 01:03:07,246 It's your turn. 964 01:03:08,288 --> 01:03:10,749 That's not what I was thinking. 965 01:03:10,791 --> 01:03:14,878 Sex. It's always about sex. 966 01:03:14,920 --> 01:03:18,048 It's not always about sex. 967 01:03:18,090 --> 01:03:21,218 I just thought it was about sex this time. 968 01:03:24,596 --> 01:03:28,934 Look, Vicky, love is a term that gets thrown around, 969 01:03:28,976 --> 01:03:30,936 and-and people don't mean it. 970 01:03:31,019 --> 01:03:34,231 When I say it, I want it to be more than words. 971 01:03:34,273 --> 01:03:37,025 - You know? I want it to be... - Perfect. 972 01:03:39,111 --> 01:03:41,071 Exactly. 973 01:03:41,238 --> 01:03:43,949 - Okay, Albert. You ready? - No problemo. 974 01:03:45,284 --> 01:03:49,121 ♪ I close my eyes at night ♪ 975 01:03:49,204 --> 01:03:51,498 Come on, Heather. Work with me here. 976 01:03:57,004 --> 01:03:59,798 Goal, Ostreicher! 977 01:03:59,840 --> 01:04:03,552 - All right, Oz! - Atta boy, Ozzie! 978 01:04:03,635 --> 01:04:05,554 Whoo! Yeah, baby! 979 01:04:05,679 --> 01:04:08,307 - We're crushing you losers! - Let's go, fellas! 980 01:04:08,348 --> 01:04:10,392 Come on! Whoo-hoo! 981 01:04:12,186 --> 01:04:16,648 ♪ Bumblebee, bumblebee, bumblebee, bumblebee, bumblebee ♪ 982 01:04:16,732 --> 01:04:18,775 Focus on the music. Think melody. 983 01:04:18,817 --> 01:04:21,904 - Let the music be my guide. - That would be a start. 984 01:04:32,789 --> 01:04:34,583 Who's the man? Stifler! 985 01:04:37,920 --> 01:04:40,005 Huddle up, guys! Huddle up! 986 01:04:48,055 --> 01:04:51,558 Huddle up! Come on! Okay. 987 01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:53,519 All right, all right! 988 01:04:53,560 --> 01:04:55,813 - Good hustle, guys. - Good hustle. 989 01:04:55,896 --> 01:05:00,859 But you can still lose. You all saw what happened to Oz out there. 990 01:05:00,943 --> 01:05:06,156 I don't want to ever see any of you thinking you're gonna score. 991 01:05:06,198 --> 01:05:09,409 You don't score until you score. 992 01:05:09,493 --> 01:05:11,954 - Until you score. - That's right, baby! 993 01:05:12,037 --> 01:05:14,331 It all boils down to today. 994 01:05:14,414 --> 01:05:18,293 For you seniors, this marks the culmination... 995 01:05:18,335 --> 01:05:21,380 - of the past four years. - Culmination. 996 01:05:21,463 --> 01:05:26,093 I want you to think about what this means to you. 997 01:05:26,134 --> 01:05:29,263 Do you guys wanna look back on your days at East... 998 01:05:29,346 --> 01:05:33,016 and know that you used the time you had? 999 01:05:33,100 --> 01:05:35,769 - Hell, yeah! - You do! 1000 01:05:37,729 --> 01:05:41,108 - Ah! Good attitude, Ostreicher. - Good luck, fellas. 1001 01:05:41,150 --> 01:05:44,653 Christ, I didn't tell ya to leave the game. 1002 01:05:44,736 --> 01:05:46,697 I'm sorry, Coach. 1003 01:05:46,780 --> 01:05:49,741 You got someplace more important to be, Ostreicher? 1004 01:05:49,825 --> 01:05:52,077 Yeah. 1005 01:05:52,161 --> 01:05:54,329 Ostreicher! 1006 01:05:55,247 --> 01:05:58,834 Oz? Fuckface? 1007 01:05:58,876 --> 01:06:01,545 Ostreicher! 1008 01:06:26,862 --> 01:06:29,448 - Hey, Oz! - Ozmeister! 1009 01:06:29,490 --> 01:06:31,492 - Oh, great. - What about the game? 1010 01:06:31,533 --> 01:06:34,620 - I'm not playing. - You're missing the game for us? 1011 01:06:34,703 --> 01:06:37,915 No, I'm missing the game for you. 1012 01:06:41,293 --> 01:06:45,047 - D-Does this mean I'm not gonna get to do the duet? - Albert, you suck. 1013 01:06:50,219 --> 01:06:52,137 I don't think he's comin' back. 1014 01:06:52,221 --> 01:06:54,389 ♪ Close my eyes at night ♪ 1015 01:06:54,431 --> 01:06:59,311 - ♪ Close my eyes ♪ - ♪ Wonderin' where would I be without you in my life ♪ 1016 01:06:59,394 --> 01:07:03,148 ♪ Everything I did was just a bore ♪ 1017 01:07:03,232 --> 01:07:08,195 - ♪ Just a bore ♪ - ♪ Everywhere I went seems I been there before ♪ 1018 01:07:08,237 --> 01:07:12,491 ♪ But you brighten up for me all of my days ♪ 1019 01:07:12,574 --> 01:07:15,828 ♪ With a love so sweet In so many ways ♪ 1020 01:07:15,869 --> 01:07:18,121 ♪ I just wanna stop ♪ 1021 01:07:18,205 --> 01:07:22,793 ♪ And thank you, baby I just wanna stop ♪ 1022 01:07:22,876 --> 01:07:26,129 ♪ And thank you, baby Thank you, baby ♪ 1023 01:07:26,171 --> 01:07:30,801 ♪ How sweet it is to be loved by you ♪ 1024 01:07:34,012 --> 01:07:36,306 Yeah, Oz! You fuckin' rule! 1025 01:07:36,390 --> 01:07:39,017 - Fuckin' rule! - Yeah! 1026 01:07:41,603 --> 01:07:43,897 Maybe the words aren't that important. 1027 01:07:43,981 --> 01:07:46,191 It's like, I know he really cares about me, you know? 1028 01:07:46,275 --> 01:07:48,360 Even if he can't say it, he does. 1029 01:07:48,443 --> 01:07:52,364 And yeah, he always talks about sex, but that's okay, 'cause he's a guy, right? 1030 01:07:52,447 --> 01:07:55,075 - He's got a dick. He's a guy. - Right. 1031 01:07:55,117 --> 01:07:57,077 Wait. Is this translation right? 1032 01:07:57,119 --> 01:08:00,122 "Go home, bird teacher. I've had enough." 1033 01:08:00,164 --> 01:08:03,125 I don't know. I got it from Kevin. 1034 01:08:03,208 --> 01:08:06,753 - So, does it hurt? - What? 1035 01:08:06,837 --> 01:08:09,548 You know... sex. Does it hurt? 1036 01:08:09,590 --> 01:08:14,011 Yeah. I mean, the first time you do it, you know, it hurts. 1037 01:08:14,052 --> 01:08:18,223 But then you, you do it again and again and again... 1038 01:08:18,307 --> 01:08:21,518 It just starts to feel good. Really good. 1039 01:08:21,602 --> 01:08:24,646 Okay, so say I don't do it. 1040 01:08:24,688 --> 01:08:29,485 And then I go off to college. I might end up doing it with some random guy... 1041 01:08:29,526 --> 01:08:33,280 - who totally turns out to be a jerk. - This is true. 1042 01:08:33,322 --> 01:08:36,033 And I'll wish I would've done it with Kevin. 1043 01:08:36,116 --> 01:08:38,368 So go do it with Kevin. 1044 01:08:38,452 --> 01:08:41,538 - You think? - Yeah. You're... You're ready. 1045 01:08:41,622 --> 01:08:45,959 - You're woman. Look at you. You're ready for sex. - You're right. 1046 01:08:46,001 --> 01:08:48,420 - I know. - I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna have sex. 1047 01:08:48,504 --> 01:08:51,131 - Now. - And it's gonna be right, and it's gonna be just perfect. 1048 01:08:51,173 --> 01:08:53,300 - Perfect sex. - Thanks, Jessica. 1049 01:08:53,467 --> 01:08:55,886 Please. 1050 01:08:55,969 --> 01:08:58,764 Kevin. 1051 01:08:58,847 --> 01:09:00,891 Kevin. 1052 01:09:02,476 --> 01:09:05,896 - I wanna have sex. - Now? 1053 01:09:11,151 --> 01:09:13,195 Prom. 1054 01:09:15,405 --> 01:09:20,744 ♪ As you walk up those steps and garner your award ♪ 1055 01:09:20,828 --> 01:09:24,873 ♪ Try not to forget about me ♪ 1056 01:09:24,915 --> 01:09:28,126 ♪ 'Cause I was there when you had no one else to hold ♪ 1057 01:09:30,712 --> 01:09:34,049 ♪ You used to look just like a saint ♪ 1058 01:09:34,091 --> 01:09:36,051 ♪ And stumble into walls ♪ 1059 01:09:36,093 --> 01:09:39,721 ♪ You're a guy's very own quarantine ♪ 1060 01:09:39,805 --> 01:09:44,226 ♪ You used to never think you'd ever grow old ♪ 1061 01:09:54,820 --> 01:09:57,322 You must be excited about the big night tonight. 1062 01:09:57,364 --> 01:09:59,533 Thrilled. 1063 01:09:59,616 --> 01:10:01,118 Who's the lucky girl? 1064 01:10:01,160 --> 01:10:02,661 Who's the lucky girl? 1065 01:10:02,744 --> 01:10:04,663 Michelle. 1066 01:10:04,746 --> 01:10:07,833 - Michelle. - Yeah. 1067 01:10:07,916 --> 01:10:12,087 - She must be very special. - Oh, she's special, all right. 1068 01:10:12,171 --> 01:10:15,174 I'm sure she is special if you picked her out of the whole bunch. 1069 01:10:17,885 --> 01:10:20,637 Jim, I'm just gonna say one thing... 1070 01:10:20,721 --> 01:10:22,639 before you leave tonight. 1071 01:10:24,266 --> 01:10:28,562 I want you to be very, very careful... 1072 01:10:28,604 --> 01:10:31,231 when you're putting on... 1073 01:10:31,315 --> 01:10:33,942 the corsage. 1074 01:10:37,029 --> 01:10:38,947 Okay, Dad. 1075 01:10:39,031 --> 01:10:41,408 - Promise me. - I promise. 1076 01:11:02,179 --> 01:11:05,724 ♪ Midnight at the oasis ♪ 1077 01:11:06,934 --> 01:11:10,103 ♪ Send your camel to bed ♪ 1078 01:11:12,314 --> 01:11:16,193 ♪ Shadows painting our faces ♪ 1079 01:11:16,276 --> 01:11:18,612 ♪ Traces ♪ 1080 01:11:18,695 --> 01:11:22,616 ♪ Of romance in our heads ♪ 1081 01:11:22,658 --> 01:11:25,953 ♪ Heaven's holding a half-moon ♪ 1082 01:11:27,830 --> 01:11:30,749 ♪ Shining just for us ♪ 1083 01:11:32,876 --> 01:11:36,839 ♪ Let's slip off to a sand dune ♪ 1084 01:11:36,880 --> 01:11:39,091 ♪ Real soon ♪ 1085 01:11:39,174 --> 01:11:42,094 ♪ And kick up a little dust ♪ 1086 01:11:42,177 --> 01:11:47,182 ♪ Come on Cactus is our friend ♪ 1087 01:11:47,224 --> 01:11:51,562 ♪ He'll point out the way ♪ 1088 01:11:51,645 --> 01:11:54,356 You know, at band camp we have dances like this, 1089 01:11:54,398 --> 01:11:56,608 only they're way funner. 1090 01:11:57,693 --> 01:12:01,113 ♪ Till the evenin' ends ♪ 1091 01:12:11,206 --> 01:12:14,459 All right, status check. Where do you guys stand? 1092 01:12:14,543 --> 01:12:18,338 Finch, we know where you are, but can't really use that as an excuse. 1093 01:12:18,422 --> 01:12:20,340 Jim? 1094 01:12:20,424 --> 01:12:24,678 Uh, my date's a flute-toting band dork. Does that answer your question? 1095 01:12:24,761 --> 01:12:28,223 Oz, is this vocal-jazz shit gonna pay off or what? 1096 01:12:28,307 --> 01:12:31,059 Kevin, what's with the attitude? 1097 01:12:31,143 --> 01:12:34,062 Attitude? Me? 1098 01:12:34,146 --> 01:12:36,773 I think you guys should be a little more enthusiastic. 1099 01:12:36,857 --> 01:12:39,359 This is the night we've been waiting for. 1100 01:12:39,401 --> 01:12:41,528 We're in this together. You guys can't back out. 1101 01:12:41,612 --> 01:12:45,240 Kev, you don't need us to get laid. Are you afraid or something? 1102 01:12:45,324 --> 01:12:48,744 No. Come on. We made a pact. 1103 01:12:48,827 --> 01:12:52,247 You can't break that. You guys are gonna have to... 1104 01:12:52,331 --> 01:12:56,168 Have to what, Kev, huh? I don't have to do shit. 1105 01:12:56,210 --> 01:12:59,630 Forget it already. I am so sick and tired of all this bullshit pressure. 1106 01:12:59,713 --> 01:13:04,468 I've never even had sex, and already, I can't stand it. I hate sex! 1107 01:13:04,510 --> 01:13:07,513 And I'm not gonna stand around here busting my balls over something that, 1108 01:13:07,554 --> 01:13:09,932 quite frankly, isn't that damn important. 1109 01:13:10,015 --> 01:13:12,142 I'm gonna go hang out with that geek over there... 1110 01:13:12,226 --> 01:13:15,312 'cause at least she has something else to talk about besides sex. 1111 01:13:15,395 --> 01:13:17,356 Goddamn. 1112 01:13:19,358 --> 01:13:22,069 Yeah. 1113 01:13:22,152 --> 01:13:25,489 You know, at least I learned how to shit in school, buddy. 1114 01:13:25,572 --> 01:13:27,533 Hey, Finch. 1115 01:13:27,616 --> 01:13:30,327 - Wanna dance? - Yeah. 1116 01:13:35,707 --> 01:13:39,127 - How come you have no date? - I like to keep my options open. 1117 01:13:39,211 --> 01:13:41,129 I got something for you. 1118 01:13:43,048 --> 01:13:45,551 Consider it a consolation prize. 1119 01:13:48,595 --> 01:13:51,557 Jessica, this is great! 1120 01:13:51,598 --> 01:13:55,978 - Felt sorta guilty about taking your money. - You spent $200 on this? 1121 01:13:56,061 --> 01:13:59,273 No, I spent 50 on the flask, 150 on the earrings. 1122 01:14:01,400 --> 01:14:03,360 - These are, uh... - Let me just clarify... 1123 01:14:03,402 --> 01:14:07,865 - that you have no chance of scoring with me, Finch. - Of course not! 1124 01:14:07,906 --> 01:14:10,492 So I take it you and Sherman are pretty close, huh? 1125 01:14:10,576 --> 01:14:12,578 You met at that party a while back, right? 1126 01:14:12,661 --> 01:14:14,580 Yeah, we were up all night together. 1127 01:14:14,663 --> 01:14:17,749 We had one of those amazingly deep conversations... 1128 01:14:17,833 --> 01:14:20,794 where you feel like you really get to know someone. 1129 01:14:20,878 --> 01:14:24,173 Deep conversation, huh? 1130 01:14:24,256 --> 01:14:26,466 Is that what you call it? 1131 01:14:26,550 --> 01:14:28,510 What else would I call it? 1132 01:14:35,350 --> 01:14:37,311 Thank you, Great Falls. 1133 01:14:37,352 --> 01:14:40,355 We're gonna take a little break. You are beautiful. 1134 01:14:44,735 --> 01:14:46,653 You suck! 1135 01:14:49,573 --> 01:14:52,159 Excuse me, everyone. 1136 01:14:52,242 --> 01:14:54,411 Sorry to interrupt. 1137 01:14:54,453 --> 01:14:56,830 I just thought you all should know this. 1138 01:14:56,914 --> 01:14:59,583 Chuck Sherman is a liar. 1139 01:14:59,625 --> 01:15:01,919 I never had sex with him. 1140 01:15:02,002 --> 01:15:06,423 He's never had sex with anyone. I know this because he told me. 1141 01:15:06,465 --> 01:15:10,344 Once he tried to screw a grapefruit, but that's all. 1142 01:15:10,385 --> 01:15:13,722 Oh. He also told me that when he gets nervous, he sometimes wets his pants. 1143 01:15:13,806 --> 01:15:18,101 Thank you for your time. 1144 01:15:30,572 --> 01:15:33,826 - Guess what? - Not interested. 1145 01:15:33,909 --> 01:15:38,205 Kevin. Come on, man. The bus to Stifler's is gonna be here soon. 1146 01:15:38,288 --> 01:15:40,207 - I'm not going. - What? 1147 01:15:40,290 --> 01:15:43,836 Why not? 1148 01:15:43,919 --> 01:15:48,674 Look, things didn't really turn out how I wanted them to. 1149 01:15:48,757 --> 01:15:51,134 I mean, I don't even know what I'm doin'. 1150 01:15:51,176 --> 01:15:54,596 I-I'm acting like I've got everything together tonight. 1151 01:15:54,638 --> 01:15:58,350 I know that Vicky's gonna ask me if I love her, and... 1152 01:15:58,433 --> 01:16:00,352 I don't know what I'm gonna say. 1153 01:16:00,435 --> 01:16:02,396 I mean, I'm on the brink. 1154 01:16:02,437 --> 01:16:06,024 I'm just about to do it. I should be psyched. 1155 01:16:06,108 --> 01:16:10,195 I don't know. Maybe you're right. Maybe I am just scared. 1156 01:16:10,279 --> 01:16:14,366 Come on, Kev. Tonight is the night. 1157 01:16:14,449 --> 01:16:17,578 We-We are finally going to a post-prom party on the lake. 1158 01:16:17,661 --> 01:16:19,997 We have been waiting for this for four years. 1159 01:16:20,080 --> 01:16:23,167 Why else have we been friends with Stifler all this time, right? 1160 01:16:24,126 --> 01:16:26,545 We were friends with Stifler? 1161 01:16:26,587 --> 01:16:28,714 Hey, look. 1162 01:16:29,923 --> 01:16:32,676 Sherman didn't even get laid. 1163 01:16:32,718 --> 01:16:35,471 - He didn't? - No, he pissed himself. 1164 01:16:35,554 --> 01:16:37,681 What? 1165 01:16:39,349 --> 01:16:41,351 We'll tell you on the bus. 1166 01:16:41,393 --> 01:16:44,563 I'm gonna go inside and grab my bag. 1167 01:16:44,646 --> 01:16:47,149 My date too, perhaps? 1168 01:16:48,817 --> 01:16:50,986 Stifler's mom got it in the divorce. 1169 01:16:51,069 --> 01:16:52,988 That reminds me of this one time... 1170 01:16:53,071 --> 01:16:55,991 Hey, can I ask you a question? 1171 01:16:56,074 --> 01:16:58,744 How come you don't have any stories? I've got lots of them, 1172 01:16:58,785 --> 01:17:01,038 and you don't have any. 1173 01:17:01,121 --> 01:17:04,291 Oh, I've got stories. Believe me. They're just, uh... 1174 01:17:04,374 --> 01:17:07,127 They're just a little more risque than tales of band camp. 1175 01:17:07,211 --> 01:17:11,757 Are they gross or something? Like guy stuff? Tell me! 1176 01:17:11,840 --> 01:17:13,759 Okay. You want a story? 1177 01:17:13,842 --> 01:17:16,428 Here's a story. Stifler finds this beer... 1178 01:17:19,598 --> 01:17:23,894 - This is the nicest room in the house. - Kev, it's perfect. 1179 01:17:34,696 --> 01:17:38,367 You guys are gonna fuck, aren't ya? 1180 01:17:38,450 --> 01:17:41,036 Fuckers! Fuckers, fuckers! 1181 01:17:41,119 --> 01:17:43,372 Fuckers, fuckers, fuckers! 1182 01:17:44,790 --> 01:17:47,417 - Out. - Aw, come on! 1183 01:17:47,501 --> 01:17:49,920 - Get out. - Aw, man! 1184 01:18:07,980 --> 01:18:09,982 There's something I've been meaning to tell you, Heather. 1185 01:18:10,065 --> 01:18:12,401 What's that? 1186 01:18:12,484 --> 01:18:14,778 It's gonna sound really bad, but, uh, 1187 01:18:14,820 --> 01:18:17,447 I want you to know. 1188 01:18:17,531 --> 01:18:20,242 You see, uh, 1189 01:18:20,284 --> 01:18:24,580 I'm a virgin, and, uh... 1190 01:18:24,621 --> 01:18:27,291 Well, me, Kevin, Jim and Finch were... 1191 01:18:27,374 --> 01:18:30,085 We all made this pact... 1192 01:18:30,210 --> 01:18:33,046 that we would lose our virginity... 1193 01:18:33,088 --> 01:18:35,174 before high school was over, 1194 01:18:35,257 --> 01:18:38,302 and tonight is supposed to be the night that we all do it. 1195 01:18:40,304 --> 01:18:42,389 This isn't the best way to proposition me. 1196 01:18:42,473 --> 01:18:45,267 No, that's... That's not what I mean. 1197 01:18:45,350 --> 01:18:48,520 W- What I mean is, uh... 1198 01:18:48,604 --> 01:18:51,356 Look, do you know what made me leave that game? 1199 01:18:51,440 --> 01:18:55,486 See, Coach, he was givin' us this speech about... 1200 01:18:55,527 --> 01:18:58,238 not slacking off when you see the opportunity to score... 1201 01:18:58,322 --> 01:19:00,365 This isn't any better, Chris. 1202 01:19:00,449 --> 01:19:02,534 No, you see... You see, Heather, 1203 01:19:02,618 --> 01:19:05,037 what I realized is that... 1204 01:19:05,120 --> 01:19:10,000 with you, it's... not like I'm running towards a goal... 1205 01:19:10,083 --> 01:19:13,420 looking for the best way to score. 1206 01:19:13,462 --> 01:19:17,007 This may sound a little corny, but... 1207 01:19:17,090 --> 01:19:19,301 I feel like I've already won. 1208 01:19:21,845 --> 01:19:26,266 And, uh, I care about you a lot. 1209 01:19:27,476 --> 01:19:29,770 Oz, I know. 1210 01:19:30,938 --> 01:19:34,274 - You called me Oz. - Well, yeah. 1211 01:19:34,358 --> 01:19:36,276 It's what your friends call you. 1212 01:19:36,360 --> 01:19:39,363 I mean, I feel like I'm one of your friends now. 1213 01:19:39,446 --> 01:19:43,200 And... your girlfriend? 1214 01:19:45,494 --> 01:19:49,998 ♪ Ain't never thought that I could love like this ♪ 1215 01:19:50,082 --> 01:19:53,210 ♪ This feeling inside me is growing ♪ 1216 01:19:53,293 --> 01:19:57,840 ♪ I never thought that you would care ♪ 1217 01:20:16,984 --> 01:20:18,944 Are ya lost? 1218 01:20:23,490 --> 01:20:26,326 You're Stifler's mom. Uh... 1219 01:20:26,410 --> 01:20:29,121 No, no, not lost. Just, um, 1220 01:20:29,204 --> 01:20:31,123 you know, taking the tour. 1221 01:20:33,625 --> 01:20:37,921 Hey, uh, thank you for letting us have this wonderful party. 1222 01:20:37,963 --> 01:20:40,424 As if there was an alternative in the matter. 1223 01:20:45,387 --> 01:20:47,806 So, you enjoying yourself? 1224 01:20:47,890 --> 01:20:51,351 I'm... three sheets to the wind, ma'am. 1225 01:20:51,435 --> 01:20:53,770 I'm so happy for you. 1226 01:20:53,854 --> 01:20:55,772 But it takes the edge off, doesn't it? 1227 01:20:57,774 --> 01:21:01,028 - Where's your little date tonight? - No date. It was... 1228 01:21:01,111 --> 01:21:03,530 It was a bathroom incident. 1229 01:21:03,572 --> 01:21:08,160 - Pardon me? - Never mind. 1230 01:21:11,955 --> 01:21:14,333 You have anything to drink? 1231 01:21:14,416 --> 01:21:16,335 I believe the kegs are upstairs. 1232 01:21:17,669 --> 01:21:20,172 That is what the cretins drink. 1233 01:21:20,255 --> 01:21:22,341 I'm talking about alcohol, liquor. 1234 01:21:22,424 --> 01:21:25,385 - The good stuff. - All right. 1235 01:21:27,012 --> 01:21:28,972 I got some scotch. 1236 01:21:29,014 --> 01:21:33,644 - Single malt? - Aged 18 years. 1237 01:21:33,727 --> 01:21:35,646 The way I like it. 1238 01:21:39,441 --> 01:21:41,652 Why don't you go grab a glass from the bar? 1239 01:21:44,071 --> 01:21:46,740 I think I should. 1240 01:21:46,824 --> 01:21:48,784 Allow me. 1241 01:21:50,410 --> 01:21:52,329 You know it's a bitchin' party. 1242 01:21:52,412 --> 01:21:54,873 The Stif-man always comes through in the clutch. 1243 01:21:58,377 --> 01:22:01,839 And then he just puked his brains out. 1244 01:22:01,922 --> 01:22:04,842 - That is a nasty story. - Yep, I told you. 1245 01:22:04,883 --> 01:22:07,052 Do you want to hear a nasty story of mine? 1246 01:22:07,136 --> 01:22:09,179 It's sort of sexual. 1247 01:22:11,140 --> 01:22:13,684 Yeah! Yeah, let's hear it. 1248 01:22:13,767 --> 01:22:18,605 Okay, well, this one time at band camp, we were playing this game. 1249 01:22:18,689 --> 01:22:22,359 I don't know if you know it, but it's called "Spin the Bottle." 1250 01:22:22,401 --> 01:22:26,280 And I had to kiss this guy named Mark Wander on the lips. 1251 01:22:26,363 --> 01:22:28,282 And-And he plays trombone... 1252 01:22:28,365 --> 01:22:30,784 So how do you want to be? 1253 01:22:30,868 --> 01:22:33,829 Like... how do you want to do it? 1254 01:22:35,080 --> 01:22:37,749 I don't know. How do you? 1255 01:22:37,833 --> 01:22:42,588 Like... normal style. The missionary position. 1256 01:22:44,298 --> 01:22:46,216 Okay. 1257 01:22:52,473 --> 01:22:54,600 Kev? 1258 01:22:54,683 --> 01:22:56,977 - Yeah? - I wanna hear you say it. 1259 01:22:57,060 --> 01:22:59,480 Okay. 1260 01:23:02,399 --> 01:23:04,693 Victoria, 1261 01:23:04,776 --> 01:23:06,695 I love you. 1262 01:23:08,447 --> 01:23:11,158 I love you. 1263 01:23:22,544 --> 01:23:24,713 ♪ Don't stray ♪ 1264 01:23:24,796 --> 01:23:27,466 ♪ Don't ever go away ♪ 1265 01:23:27,549 --> 01:23:30,010 ♪ I should be much too smart for this ♪ 1266 01:23:30,093 --> 01:23:32,596 ♪ You know it gets the better of me ♪ 1267 01:23:32,679 --> 01:23:37,309 ♪ Sometimes when you and I collide ♪ 1268 01:23:37,392 --> 01:23:39,645 - ♪ I fall into an ocean of you ♪ - Oh. My hair. 1269 01:23:39,686 --> 01:23:42,064 ♪ Pull me out in time ♪ 1270 01:23:42,147 --> 01:23:43,982 ♪ Don't let me drown ♪ 1271 01:23:44,066 --> 01:23:46,610 ♪ Let me down ♪ 1272 01:23:46,652 --> 01:23:49,154 You okay? 1273 01:23:49,196 --> 01:23:53,158 Yeah. Go slow. 1274 01:23:53,200 --> 01:23:56,078 ♪ Say you'll stay ♪ 1275 01:23:56,161 --> 01:23:59,248 ♪ Don't come and go ♪ 1276 01:23:59,331 --> 01:24:01,333 ♪ Like you do ♪ 1277 01:24:03,293 --> 01:24:05,838 ♪ Sway my way ♪ 1278 01:24:05,921 --> 01:24:09,216 ♪ Yeah, I need to know ♪ 1279 01:24:09,258 --> 01:24:11,969 ♪ All about you ♪ 1280 01:24:13,262 --> 01:24:15,722 ♪ Say you'll stay ♪ 1281 01:24:15,806 --> 01:24:18,725 So the end of the story is you... 1282 01:24:18,809 --> 01:24:20,894 had to kiss the guy for 20 seconds. 1283 01:24:20,978 --> 01:24:24,940 Yes! And he was such a dork. Everyone laughed at me... 1284 01:24:25,023 --> 01:24:29,153 - but I didn't care because it was so funny. - I get it. 1285 01:24:29,194 --> 01:24:32,990 And this one time at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy. 1286 01:24:35,284 --> 01:24:37,411 Excuse me? 1287 01:24:37,494 --> 01:24:40,205 What? You don't think I know how to get myself off? 1288 01:24:40,289 --> 01:24:43,709 Hell, that's what half of band camp is... Sex Ed. 1289 01:24:43,792 --> 01:24:46,920 So are we gonna screw soon, 'cause I'm gettin' kinda antsy. 1290 01:24:56,013 --> 01:24:58,223 This'll do. Whoo-hoo! 1291 01:24:59,725 --> 01:25:04,146 Ow! 1292 01:25:04,229 --> 01:25:06,440 Now, I have two rubbers. Wear them both. It'll desensitize you. 1293 01:25:06,482 --> 01:25:08,692 Now, I have two rubbers. Wear them both. It'll desensitize you. 1294 01:25:08,734 --> 01:25:11,236 I don't want you coming so damn early this time. 1295 01:25:13,447 --> 01:25:15,782 What makes you think that I would come early? 1296 01:25:15,866 --> 01:25:19,953 Come on. I saw you on the 'Net. Why do you think I accepted this date? 1297 01:25:19,995 --> 01:25:22,748 You're a sure thing. 1298 01:25:24,833 --> 01:25:27,669 Yes, I am. 1299 01:25:27,753 --> 01:25:32,424 So I said, "This is very obviously a Piero della Francesca." 1300 01:25:39,723 --> 01:25:45,521 So, uh, would you object if I said that you were quite striking? 1301 01:25:45,562 --> 01:25:50,526 Mr. Finch, are you trying to seduce me? 1302 01:25:50,567 --> 01:25:52,653 - Yes, ma'am, I am. - ♪ And here's to you ♪ 1303 01:25:52,694 --> 01:25:55,489 ♪ Mrs. Robinson ♪ 1304 01:25:55,531 --> 01:25:59,326 ♪ Jesus loves you more than you will know ♪ 1305 01:26:01,870 --> 01:26:04,998 ♪ Stand up tall, Mrs. Robinson ♪ 1306 01:26:05,040 --> 01:26:08,794 - Mmm, you're dead. - ♪ God in heaven smiles on those who pray ♪ 1307 01:26:08,877 --> 01:26:12,172 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 1308 01:26:12,256 --> 01:26:14,091 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 1309 01:26:14,133 --> 01:26:16,093 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 1310 01:26:16,176 --> 01:26:19,096 ♪ Sway my way ♪ 1311 01:26:19,138 --> 01:26:22,224 ♪ Yeah, I need to know ♪ 1312 01:26:22,307 --> 01:26:25,435 ♪ All about you ♪ 1313 01:26:25,519 --> 01:26:28,230 ♪ And there's no cure ♪ 1314 01:26:28,313 --> 01:26:30,816 ♪ And no way to be sure ♪ 1315 01:26:30,899 --> 01:26:33,318 ♪ Why everything's turned inside out ♪ 1316 01:26:33,402 --> 01:26:35,320 ♪ Instilling so much doubt ♪ 1317 01:26:35,404 --> 01:26:38,031 ♪ It makes me so tired ♪ 1318 01:26:38,073 --> 01:26:40,701 ♪ I feel so uninspired ♪ 1319 01:26:40,742 --> 01:26:43,287 ♪ My head is battling with my heart ♪ 1320 01:26:43,370 --> 01:26:47,166 ♪ My logic has been torn apart And now ♪ 1321 01:26:47,207 --> 01:26:49,751 - I had no idea you'd be this good. - Neither did I. 1322 01:26:49,835 --> 01:26:51,879 Oh, Finchy. Finch. 1323 01:26:51,962 --> 01:26:54,882 - Oh, Stifler's mom! - Finchy! 1324 01:27:01,138 --> 01:27:04,141 Okay, let's go. 1325 01:27:04,224 --> 01:27:06,685 What's my name? Say my name, bitch! 1326 01:27:06,727 --> 01:27:08,896 Michelle, Michelle. 1327 01:27:10,522 --> 01:27:12,441 Oh, God. 1328 01:27:40,135 --> 01:27:42,095 That was a great night, huh? 1329 01:27:44,515 --> 01:27:46,433 Yeah. 1330 01:27:48,435 --> 01:27:51,438 I mean, I just can't believe we had our senior prom. 1331 01:27:51,522 --> 01:27:55,400 I know. It went by so fast. 1332 01:27:55,484 --> 01:27:58,111 Yeah, it did. 1333 01:27:58,195 --> 01:28:00,113 Kevin? 1334 01:28:04,868 --> 01:28:07,329 Next year with you going to Ann Arbor... 1335 01:28:07,412 --> 01:28:10,541 and me going to Ithaca, 1336 01:28:10,624 --> 01:28:13,752 it's not gonna work, is it? 1337 01:28:13,836 --> 01:28:15,838 No. Don't say that. 1338 01:28:15,921 --> 01:28:18,423 I mean, we could make it work. 1339 01:28:19,758 --> 01:28:22,427 - It'll be perfect. - No, Kevin. 1340 01:28:24,179 --> 01:28:26,598 - But... - See, that's what I've been realizing... 1341 01:28:26,682 --> 01:28:29,434 is that... nothing's perfect. 1342 01:28:29,476 --> 01:28:33,981 And you can't plan everything. 1343 01:28:34,064 --> 01:28:37,818 Well, I guess... you will be pretty far away. 1344 01:28:39,153 --> 01:28:42,156 And we'll be on our own, meeting new people. 1345 01:28:46,368 --> 01:28:48,328 Last night, though. 1346 01:28:52,040 --> 01:28:55,043 I wasn't lying. 1347 01:28:56,420 --> 01:28:58,338 I know. 1348 01:29:14,021 --> 01:29:17,483 She's gone. Wha... 1349 01:29:17,566 --> 01:29:19,610 Oh, my God. She used me. 1350 01:29:19,693 --> 01:29:21,612 I was used. 1351 01:29:23,572 --> 01:29:26,992 I was used. Cool! 1352 01:29:29,328 --> 01:29:31,288 What's this door locked... 1353 01:29:31,330 --> 01:29:33,290 Mom, where's... 1354 01:29:34,791 --> 01:29:39,046 - Mom? Shit-brick? - Hey, Stifler. 1355 01:29:41,298 --> 01:29:44,635 ♪ Do do do do do do do ♪ 1356 01:29:44,718 --> 01:29:48,138 I just gotta say that women, 1357 01:29:48,222 --> 01:29:50,808 like a fine wine, only get better with age. 1358 01:29:52,476 --> 01:29:55,604 Of course, I have no basis for comparison, but, uh, 1359 01:29:55,646 --> 01:29:57,606 it was good. 1360 01:29:57,648 --> 01:30:00,150 So you almost made it, huh, Oz? 1361 01:30:00,192 --> 01:30:04,363 - I'll just say that we had a great night together. - Hang in there, buddy. 1362 01:30:04,446 --> 01:30:08,867 - You'll get there. - You know, guys, I think we're falling in love. 1363 01:30:08,951 --> 01:30:12,788 Wha... 1364 01:30:12,871 --> 01:30:15,374 That's great, man. That's awesome. 1365 01:30:16,667 --> 01:30:19,461 Y- You know what the coolest thing is, guys? 1366 01:30:19,545 --> 01:30:21,630 This. You know, right now. 1367 01:30:21,713 --> 01:30:25,425 It's true. I mean, after this, everything's gonna be different. 1368 01:30:25,509 --> 01:30:28,679 After... getting laid? 1369 01:30:28,762 --> 01:30:31,723 - After high school. - Here's to the next step. 1370 01:30:31,807 --> 01:30:35,394 - To the next step. - To the next step. - To the next step. 1371 01:30:37,146 --> 01:30:39,857 ♪ Do do do do do do do ♪ 1372 01:30:39,940 --> 01:30:42,776 ♪ Do do do do do do do ♪ 1373 01:30:42,860 --> 01:30:44,778 ♪ Do do do do do do do ♪ 1374 01:30:44,820 --> 01:30:47,281 ♪ Do do do do do do do ♪ 1375 01:30:53,620 --> 01:30:57,958 ♪ Chickety China, the Chinese chicken, have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin' ♪ 1376 01:30:58,000 --> 01:31:00,085 ♪ Watchin' X Files with no lights on ♪ 1377 01:31:00,169 --> 01:31:02,087 ♪ We're dans la maison I hope the Smoking Man's in this one ♪ 1378 01:31:02,171 --> 01:31:04,298 ♪ Like Harrison Ford I'm getting frantic ♪ 1379 01:31:04,339 --> 01:31:05,466 ♪ Like Sting I'm tantric Like Snickers guaranteed to satisfy ♪ 1380 01:31:05,507 --> 01:31:06,592 ♪ Like Sting I'm tantric Like Snickers guaranteed to satisfy ♪ 1381 01:31:06,633 --> 01:31:08,594 ♪ Like Kurosawa I make mad films ♪ 1382 01:31:08,635 --> 01:31:10,596 ♪ Okay, I don't make films but if I did they'd have a samurai ♪ 1383 01:31:10,679 --> 01:31:12,598 ♪ Gonna get a set of better clubs, gonna find the kind with tiny nubs ♪ 1384 01:31:12,681 --> 01:31:15,392 ♪ So my irons aren't always flyin' off the backswing ♪ 1385 01:31:15,476 --> 01:31:17,394 ♪ Gonna get in tune with Sailor Moon 'cause that cartoon ♪ 1386 01:31:17,478 --> 01:31:19,396 ♪ Has got the boom anime babes that make me think the wrong thing ♪ 1387 01:31:19,480 --> 01:31:21,482 ♪ How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad ♪ 1388 01:31:21,565 --> 01:31:23,567 ♪ Tryin' hard not to smile though I feel bad ♪ 1389 01:31:23,609 --> 01:31:25,569 ♪ I'm the kinda guy who laughs at a funeral ♪ 1390 01:31:25,652 --> 01:31:27,404 - Sweetheart? - ♪ Can't understand what I mean You soon will ♪ 1391 01:31:27,654 --> 01:31:29,865 ♪ It's been one week since you looked at me ♪ 1392 01:31:29,907 --> 01:31:30,908 ♪ Dropped your eyes to the side and said, I'm sorry ♪ 1393 01:31:30,949 --> 01:31:31,867 ♪ Dropped your eyes to the side and said, I'm sorry ♪ 1394 01:31:31,950 --> 01:31:35,913 ♪ Hello to your mother your brother significant other ♪ 1395 01:31:35,996 --> 01:31:40,584 ♪ I am the summertime ♪ 1396 01:31:40,667 --> 01:31:46,215 ♪ And I'm here to free your mind ♪ 1397 01:31:46,298 --> 01:31:50,344 ♪ Kick off your shoes the blues and use anything but your mind ♪ 1398 01:31:50,427 --> 01:31:55,015 ♪ 'Cause this is the summertime ♪ 1399 01:31:55,098 --> 01:32:00,562 ♪ And it's here to free your mind ♪ 1400 01:32:00,646 --> 01:32:05,484 ♪ How many other people can you save today ♪ 1401 01:32:05,567 --> 01:32:10,447 ♪ Don't you think it's high time that you sail away ♪ 1402 01:32:10,489 --> 01:32:15,244 ♪ Leave today Don't fall behind ♪ 1403 01:32:15,285 --> 01:32:19,540 ♪ Try something new, turn into you if only for a short time ♪ 1404 01:32:19,623 --> 01:32:24,378 ♪ I am the summertime ♪ 1405 01:32:24,419 --> 01:32:29,424 ♪ And I'm here to free your mind ♪ 1406 01:32:39,059 --> 01:32:41,311 ♪ Love is tragic Love is bold ♪ 1407 01:32:41,353 --> 01:32:44,481 ♪ You will always do what you are told ♪ 1408 01:32:49,319 --> 01:32:51,738 ♪ Love is hard Love is strong ♪ 1409 01:32:51,822 --> 01:32:54,950 ♪ You will never say that you were wrong ♪ 1410 01:32:59,830 --> 01:33:02,291 ♪ I don't know when I got bitter ♪ 1411 01:33:02,332 --> 01:33:06,920 ♪ Love is surely better when it's gone ♪ 1412 01:33:08,964 --> 01:33:11,467 ♪ 'Cause you wanted more ♪ 1413 01:33:11,550 --> 01:33:14,136 ♪ More than I could give ♪ 1414 01:33:14,219 --> 01:33:16,472 ♪ More than I could handle ♪ 1415 01:33:16,555 --> 01:33:19,600 ♪ And a life that I can't live ♪ 1416 01:33:19,683 --> 01:33:22,102 ♪ You wanted more ♪ 1417 01:33:22,144 --> 01:33:24,646 ♪ More than I could bear ♪ 1418 01:33:24,730 --> 01:33:27,065 ♪ More than I could offer ♪ 1419 01:33:27,149 --> 01:33:30,694 ♪ And a love that isn't there ♪ 1420 01:33:42,080 --> 01:33:44,500 ♪ Love is color Love is love ♪ 1421 01:33:44,583 --> 01:33:47,711 ♪ Love is never saying you're too proud ♪ 1422 01:33:52,341 --> 01:33:54,885 ♪ Love is trusting Love is honest ♪ 1423 01:33:54,968 --> 01:33:58,055 ♪ Love is not a hand that holds you down ♪ 1424 01:34:02,851 --> 01:34:05,270 ♪ I don't know when I got bitter ♪ 1425 01:34:05,354 --> 01:34:09,900 ♪ Love is surely better when it's gone ♪ 1426 01:34:11,944 --> 01:34:14,446 ♪ 'Cause you wanted more ♪ 1427 01:34:14,530 --> 01:34:17,115 ♪ More than I could give ♪ 1428 01:34:17,199 --> 01:34:19,535 ♪ More than I could handle ♪ 1429 01:34:19,618 --> 01:34:22,579 ♪ And a life that I can't live ♪ 1430 01:34:22,663 --> 01:34:25,082 ♪ You wanted more ♪ 1431 01:34:25,123 --> 01:34:27,668 ♪ More than I could bear ♪ 1432 01:34:27,751 --> 01:34:30,129 ♪ More than I could offer ♪ 1433 01:34:30,170 --> 01:34:33,715 ♪ And a love that isn't there ♪ 1434 01:34:37,344 --> 01:34:41,181 ♪ I gotta pick me up when I am down ♪ 1435 01:34:42,766 --> 01:34:46,436 ♪ I gotta get my feet back on the ground ♪ 1436 01:34:48,021 --> 01:34:53,026 ♪ I gotta pick me up when I am down ♪ 1437 01:35:03,579 --> 01:35:05,998 ♪ I don't know when I got bitter ♪ 1438 01:35:06,081 --> 01:35:10,627 ♪ But love is surely better when it's gone ♪ 1439 01:35:12,713 --> 01:35:15,257 ♪ 'Cause you wanted more ♪ 1440 01:35:15,340 --> 01:35:17,926 ♪ More than I could give ♪ 1441 01:35:18,010 --> 01:35:20,262 ♪ More than I could handle ♪ 1442 01:35:20,345 --> 01:35:23,390 ♪ And a life that I can't live ♪ 1443 01:35:23,474 --> 01:35:25,851 ♪ You wanted more ♪ 116028