Original subtitles

Previously on wynonna earp.

You fell asleep entwined.

It's a new thing. It's casual.

My DNA test.

You can't unsee the result.

I'm not a child, Nicole.

I should've known you two had something to do with the curse.

- What do these Widows want? - Time.

That little Tucker is dead.

Hands on your head! NOW!

We need to work fast

until we find the last seal. The third seal? It's Doc's ring.

A wedding ring, on the finger of the best gunslinger alive.

If those bitches in black break it, Clootie the demon will rise.

Heeyeah!

I don't want to hurt you. Relax. Mama came to play.

Well... I got a big stick in each hand.

Been there, done that. Ended up with tennis elbow.

Nice. Solid. Keep the enemy in mind.

Bitches in black. Demon Clootie.

- Kegels. - Nice!

Woo! High five!

Good, good, good, good. Now, visualize someone you hate.

- Nicole Haught, two days ago? - What?!

I don't hate Nicole! We just had a fight.

Let your opponent get

into your head. This happens, you're a goner. Boom!

Baby bump apology.

Hey.

You need to learn this, OK?

'Cause the Widows are not playing to lose.

Well, hell hath no fury like two bitches whose demon husband

got shot by your...

ancestor. Sounded a lot snappier in my head.

You know, I still can't get over Constance being their

sisterwife. Her outfits were so fiercely nonpolygamous.

And turns out she was the nice one.

Demon Clootie rises, the other two

are going to wreak havoc. So much revenge.

We have to find the third seal.

Yeah, I'm going to put a pin in that.

What?! We don't have time to put a pin in anything.

- Just the tip. - Hey, I think

it's best that we stick... I mean, focus on the Widows.

- Do that. I need a favor. - Yeah. Anything.

- What's up? - The night off.

Why? Is it because of the whole...

Dying and coming back to life? No, I'm just glad I didn't

reincarnate as a dung beetle. Yeah. Me too.

Yeah. And I'm gonna need the house too.

More nesting?

I just think we've reached maximum capacity

in the decorative pillow department.

OK, fine. Listen. Everyone will have the evening off.

Boom, shakalaka!

After we finish training, quitters!

Come on.

With great belly comes great responsibility.

Eyes on the prize, peeps.

Eyes on the prize.

Afternoon, sir.

Your sign boasts of antiques and libations.

If the latter includes whiskey,

I'll have one of those.

Sakes alive!

Sir, that ring is a rarity.

Bring good coin if you're selling.

I am not.

- Surely you'll want to hear my offer? - Not in the least.

Now here's a lovely piece

for any wall,

if you're looking for a gift.

I have not come for anything but the...

I'm partial to its homeyness.

Its whimsy.

Always pictured it in a bedroom. Perhaps a child's room.

Wrap it up.

I'll come back for it.

Wrap it up?

But Mr. Holliday, we're only

just getting started.

Blood pressure's good. Heart rate is good.

Temperature... still a little high,

but other than that, kind of perfect.

Better than anything Black Badge has ever given me.

- Really? - Yeah. I mean, I guess

you can give me at least like, six months' worth now, right?

- Nuh. - Because me coming here

once a week isn't convenient for either one of us, right?

The serum goes bad after eight days.

This is the winning formula.

Hey, I hate to pull rank, but...

Since when?

You need to accept this.

"Forever Eternity."

I know you guys think the apocalypse is nigh,

but a gift card to a funeral home?

Kind of weird.

A spa, OK? Massages, facials, those type of things.

Also, 30 percent off

all services on Wednesdays.

You two have done a lot for me.

So... here.

It's stupid.

Look, I'm not really good at these things.

So can you please take the God damn gift card,

grab Doc Holliday and just...

stick him in a hot tub. You're welcome.

Can you really see Doc at a spa?

Yeah. With you I can.

Also some pretty sweet blackmail photos.

Yeah.

I knew you had an ulterior motive.

Got me.

Thank you.

See you later.

That is beyond disturbing.

Sorry I was a noshow. Just try not to miss

the actual birth. Could I do that?

- Physically impossible. - Well figure it out, slacker.

I thought you were good. I'm phenomenal.

So... are you gonna do it naturally?

Through... through my...

Yeah, that's where it... Right?!

No! I mean... are you gonna do it drugfree?

What medieval misogynist lets a woman go drugfree?

I need all the drugs, yesterday.

Well, I could mix you up a cocktail

that will make birth feel like you're on a giant swan floatie

being handfed chocolate by Chris Evans.

Ooh! Captain, my Captain!

Hey, handsome.

You know you don't have to rock a straight razor

- anymore, right? - He claimed

that he "tripped" on something at the salt flats.

- Some... thing? - And now I am going for dinner.

At Wynonna's.

Cool. Awesome.

I'll see you soon. And I'll be in my truck.

Well, feel free to lock up early.

Sure.

Aren't you gonna say goodnight?

Goodnight.

- She's very fit. - Yeah,

one of the best cricket players on the Women in Blue.

Yeah. She played an innings of 240. Yes!

What?! There are 240 innings in cricket? Whoa.

No.

Yeah.

Yeah. Duh! Come on.

Since when do you care about cricket?

I don't! But the boss man loves all sports

and I want him to love me.

- Professionally. - Subtle.

You know, I'm too hangry to have this conversation.

Who emptied out the kitchen? Who do you think?

She even brought her own grocery bags.

Right. Big dinner with Doc tonight.

- Hey! - Oopsie.

Um...

So, where's Nicole? She's usually off by now.

Speak of the devil.

- Hey! Come on in. - Hey.

Sorry to interrupt... whatever this is.

A body's been found.

You sure it wasn't someone else's body that you

stole and hid because you thought you had the right

to make that utterlynotyour decision?

Why would Nicole steal a body?

Shut up, Jeremy.

Yup, got it. You think this is a BBD case?

I think it's an everyone case.

Oof. Poor thing.

Hey, you recognize this?

And that. He's allergic to penicillin?

Yeah, I'm 99 percent sure that's not what killed him.

There's usually a name...

What?

- I think you mean, "Who?" - It's Tucker.

Tucker Gardner.

No, no! 'Cause that is not appropriate or allowed.

- His body is evidence. - Mhm.

- Yeah. - Was he alive when he...

Yeah.

It's OK. It's better that I know the truth.

He did this to himself.

Why would you think that?

Tucker had many dark... proclivities.

Fire was just one of them.

I remember poor Blaze... our cat.

Unfortunate name.

Tucker always had it out for the poor thing.

Father buried the body

and mother just pretended it never happened.

Mercedes always used to say,

"One day that boy is gonna light himself on fire."

- Wow. - Regardless, can you think

of anyone who would have wanted to hurt him?

Can you think of anyone who wouldn't?

When can we take him home?

A few days. The autopsy procedure

on a burn victims is much more extensive.

Death by fire is like the...

Can I at least take his personal effects?

Mercedes will want to plan a service.

- I'm sorry, but it's... - Evidence. - Yep, you got it.

- Of course. - But, um...

Look, Ms. Gardner...

I know this is a very difficult time for you right now, but

when you're ready, of course -

Tucker was associating himself with a couple of women

that we've been looking for...

- Just get water. Water. Water. - Yes. OK. - Yep.

Hey.

Am I the biggest cliché ever?

No.

I know what you're going through.

Of course you do.

Your father, your sister...

How are you not bitter?

I have my moments.

You're so lovely.

Thank you.

I'm sorry

that Tucker was so awful to both of you.

- It's fine. - No, it's not.

Well, you of all people should understand why Tucker was drawn

to Waverly. Love takes on many forms. What's deviant to some

is normal to others.

What are you trying to say?

I know that Tucker was... odd.

But in his own way, he loved Waverly.

- That's no excuse. - Nicole, stop.

You're right.

I should go. If you need anything,

at all, let me know. OK?

You're an exceptional girl.

I cannot believe she'd try to rationalize

her brother's behavior. He's lying on a table,

burnt beyond recognition.

Sometimes lying is a kindness.

Yeah, I tried that.

With you. And look at us now.

Waverly, that girl

Tucker kidnapped and brought to your room?

He wanted it to be you.

Trust me, OK? If you had seen the look in his eyes, you would never...

You know what I'd never do?

Tell you what to think or feel.

You shouldn't have.

It looked more pleasing in the shop.

How could it look more pleasing than that?

Dinner! No!

I think it's burning! I call this, "Shitty Day",

Go Away!"

Love me a one pot meal.

Good, right?

Scrumptious.

It's better with the ketchup glaze.

You gonna tell me about that... that cut?

I paid a visit to our witchy friend at the salt flats.

Because you're a masochist?

Just not myself.

Turned out to be a quick reunion seeing

as Constance has been decapitated.

You killed her?!

If I had, I'd be dead. Mutually assured destruction, remember?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, somebody destructed her.

A witch, no less. So who? And why?

This is sweet.

Yeah. Waverly.

Who buys one maraca?

Don't they usually come as a set?

Well, I believe it is a rattle. For the baby.

They shake things.

God, it's gonna have hands. Yes.

Two of them.

And I thought that is why you brought me here,

to talk about the plan for the baby?

No. No. But soon.

Those goddamned Widows nearly killed you just a day ago.

There is no more "soon," there is only now.

I know how you got the cut.

Something demonic attacked you.

There will be more. And I suppose

my next questions are, "And how do you know?" And, "Why?"

Because they're drawn to the same thing we're looking for.

The third seal.

And you've got it.

What are we waiting for?

I can get you something else.

I never drink alone.

It's sad and depressing.

That's why we add the cherry.

Thanks.

No, thank you. You're buying.

As you have been, all day long.

I think the Virgil brothers may have maxed you out.

You forgot this at the baby shower.

I guess blind rage can do that to you.

God. Was it bad?

More than classic, less than epic.

Guess you two are still in your

postfight lull? That's the worst.

No. The worst is going for round two,

and then three, and I can't even go home

because Wynonna and Doc are...

Fudgenuggets.

Sorry.

It's all good.

You're not a fairy godmother, are you?

No.

Terribleness is coming but I would do anything

to get out of here, just for one night.

What?

Bibbity boppity boo!

Sorry, it's all I had.

Well, luckily I'd already

lost my appetite. Now, what is this third seal

I supposedly have on my person?

It's your ring.

And I need it.

Ask to borrow anything else.

Anything at all.

I don't want to borrow it. I w...

I've decided I want to break it. Break the third seal?

- Yes. - Clootie will rise. - Yes.

The demon responsible for the Earp Curse.

The curse I'm also gonna break when I kill him.

Say something. Preferably encouraging.

Like, "What? Sick plan!"

Or "Go, Earp!"

Are you completely insane?

I like my ideas better.

They had seven different infused waters.

I didn't know what you'd like so I got strawberry,

lemon and cucumber.

What, they didn't have peach?

Damn it! They did have peach.

I'm...

OK. Good one. Here.

Thanks.

Are you cold?

We're in a hot tub. Hot.

Right.

Maybe I should get us some towels. They're like,

- an inch thick. - Waverly.

Well... this feels weird!

OK, what if the Widows come back?

What if... what if we find the third seal

and I'm not there to help?

Is this your thing? Cute but annoying?

Sorry.

You know, I'll leave you alone.

OK. Just...

Look, keep calm and drink champagne.

Just take care of yourself for once.

Close your eyes.

- The towels really are great. - I know.

I shoved a couple in my bag already.

My God!

I saw it with my own eyes,

in the vision quest.

Constance created her seal, the third seal...

That ring is it.

This ring is the key to my immortality.

Agelessness.

- Beg pardon? - You're not immortal, right?

You just don't get old.

Isn't that getting boring?

You dare be so glib with my life?

No. I dare to try

to make mine. And my family's safer.

I saw the Widows destroy the second seal.

It requires a devilry I'm not certain even you can muster.

Well, you've seen me before coffee, right?

And if you break it, and if Clootie rises,

how do you propose to kill the mighty demon

Wyatt himself could not put in the grave

- for good? - We'll figure it out,

and then we'll end the curse.

Doc, we'll end it!

Together.

Not like this. The risk is too great.

I may have betrayed Wyatt,

but I vowed to spend the rest of my life protecting the Earps.

Well, how convenient. When did you supposedly make this sacred vow?

The moment I laid eyes on you.

I cannot protect

you if I am dead. If I believed this would

kill you, I wouldn't ask. You break the seal,

then I start to die!

Only as much as any of us.

You don't want to be one of us.

You think you're better than that.

You don't think

I would have done anything to get out of that well?

Better than think. I know. I was there.

You can't rewrite history anymore, Doc. Someone gave you

a chance, and you turned him down.

This devil that left me to rot.

- You saw who it was? - Mhm.

You ready for this?

Robert Svane.

Old Bobo himself.

You were selfish then and you're selfish now.

You are one to talk.

I think I need to leave.

Doc.

You can't run away from this.

You drove me here yourself. You insisted on it.

Well, give me your keys!

Give me your keys!

Fine.

They were in here! I guess they just

walked off on their own. I think I'll take a page from that book.

What are you going to do? Walk all the way back to Purgatory?

Yes! Because it is far less painful than being here

with you.

Cops are dumb. Stealing is fun.

My sister wife is pretty much done.

Once true to her,

now be true to me. The one that I seek

please help me to see.

Where are you really, traitor?

Will wonders never cease.

I'm headed out.

Try and get your beauty sleep.

You certainly need it.

I thought you already examined this seal.

Yeah. But now that know the Widows are the brides

of the demon who cursed the Earps, I'm like, why not? Fresh eyes...

- Detective work. - Yeah!

Need another set of peepers on the gin mill, do you, Ace?

Duck soup for a jobbie like me, long as you don't

gum the sting, know what I mean? No, I don't know what

you mean. What does that mean? Alright, daddy. Cool down.

- I ain't your daddy. - You're not my daddy. No.

So you think the Widows killed Tucker?

Yeah. They do like to play with fire, so...

So do you, you flameballer.

Hey, I've been working on a vapor guard to protect us

- from the venom they spray. - OK.

Because the whole paralysis thing, you know. I'm not a fan.

Um, hey, man, I'm pretty sure

that's private. I'm just taking a look. Relax.

Yeah. It's just, a... scientist's journal is like

a diary. There's a lot of sensitive information.

Formulas, test subjects...

Yeah, but what if you're the test subject?

Here. Can you replicate that?

Yeah. Totally. Just...

you know, I'm not...

I'm not gonna plagiarize, dude. Really?

'Cause that serum keeps me from going...

- From going Lizard King, yeah. - Yeah, exactly.

I know. But... man, that's why we have Rosita.

Well, Rosita isn't what you think she is, bud. Sorry.

Neither were you. You know, you fought

to keep me in BBD

even though they said I didn't have the gonads for it.

You're one of the good guys, Dolls.

Yeah, but there are grey areas.

OK, yeah, get it out, it's gonna bleed!

- OK, OK. Count to five. Ready? - OK.

One... two...

That's a good one.

Holy Stephen Hawking.

- What is it? - Not human, that's for sure.

It's a... it's a fingernail.

Beth Gardner had a bandage on the tip of her finger!

I think we just found Widow number one.

Step aside or I will physically remove you.

Two against one, Doc.

Hey! Wynonna, your condition.

That's not what this is about.

Give me the ring.

It's mine. I was destined to have it.

You made a bad deal and it went even badder.

You think getting tossed down that well, that dark,

enclosed space, was arbitrary?

No! Constance chose that particular torture

especially for me. How you figure that?

When I was 14 years old,

my mama lay sick with tuberculosis.

It was contagious,

so they kept me from her side.

I crawled into a space beneath the house,

under her room.

And do you know what I did,

- night after night? - No.

I listened to her cry.

And beg. And pray.

She died anyway.

And I never again

could stand tight quarters.

What was her name?

Alice.

Stay with me.

I'm pregnant, not helpless. Split up.

Just don't shoot any of my decorative pillows.

I'll never find the right colour combination again.

You repeat this convo, you die.

Three?! Three PhDs? Well, technically two.

Engineering and biochemistry.

The... the astrology was just an online certification.

I was dating a Scorpio. I panicked.

So you come from

a rocket scientist, super model family?

No.

Well, they must be pretty proud.

They aren't around anymore.

It's OK. It was a long time ago.

I... Can you answer her already?

No! No.

That's exactly what Nicole wants me to do.

So controlling.

I'm trying not to look, but...

I'm seeing a lot of "sorrys." I know. It's just...

This wasn't a squabble

over a borrowed shirt.

Well, what...

What was in those papers anyway? Stuff that made me

realize that my whole life has been a lie.

Yeah, which makes the people

that supposedly cared about me, liars.

Wow, there it is.

- What? - Backbone.

Fine.

Dear Control Freak.

I will talk to you

when I want to talk to you.

Until then,

have a nice life

hurting the people that you love.

No! I... don't

send... like that. OK.

- Yeah. - My God. What did I do?

A little too much backbone. But it's gonna be OK.

Nicole was right to hide those papers. I never

should have looked at them.

I messed up. We had it so perfect.

Perfect is overrated.

If everything was perfect, then champagne wouldn't have bubbles.

Bubbles are made up of carbon dioxide

rising from nucleation points.

And nucleation points are these small defects

in the glass that trap these tiny,

vibrating pockets of the carbon dioxide.

So, no defect, no bubbles,

no magic.

I'm... I'm with Nicole!

I'm with Doc.

I'm gonna... go get changed.

Rosita? I'm so sorry.

You were being so cool and so nice and I...

Tucker?

You were burned to death. I saw your body.

I'm the reason people shouldn't pick up hitchhikers.

Rosita...

What did you do?

What did I do? I got frostbite.

I almost froze to death coming back here for you!

It's OK. I'm here to save you.

- From her? - No.

From those bitches who call themselves my sisters.

Backyard,

four occupants in sight.

Fingernail may not be enough for...

probable cause, but tonight I do not give a shit.

Wynonna knew something was off with those Gardner women.

I'm sending you a mental hug,

buddy.

- Sorry. You sounded sad. - Hey! Stay put and be quiet.

Easy for you to say! The more nervous I get,

the more I talk. The more you tell me not to talk,

the more nervous I get. It is a vicious cycle.

Hello?

She's in a better place.

You're shaking.

- You killed my friend. - She wasn't your friend.

She was trying to corrupt you.

And you were letting her. What?

I saw her kiss you.

Don't lie to me, Waverly.

You and me, we're good people.

The others? They want to change us,

blame us, make us their puppets.

Please let me go.

Why in the world would I do that?

No one is upstairs but I swear

someone is in this house.

Clear down here.

Found Peacemaker though.

In the pocket of your coat.

You think I...

Well darlin', I'll take your adorable magic gun,

and I raise you a pair of pistols and two gifted hands.

Doc, shut up. Do you really think that I would shoot you to get the ring?

Yeah, I've been reading about hormones. Unstable buggers.

Ho! So you think that because I'm... I'm...

I'm the size of a giant cheeseburger

with a baby cheeseburger inside me

and maybe really hungry right now -

you think that I can't handle my job?

Things are different. You are mere weeks from giving birth.

No! Stop! Do not

ever forget

that I am the heir of this God damn curse.

And you know what? That means

that anything that has to do with the curse

is mine. That ring included.

- You think so? - I know so.

Then come and get it.

Being a Gardner was suffocating.

Mercedes and Beth were always telling me what to do.

Then one day, they changed.

Gave me freedom, supported me. Do you know why?

They saw something unique in you.

Yes! It felt like

I finally had the family I wanted.

I felt like... I could be...

me.

I guess you've always known what that feels like.

Not so much.

I used to think you were too good for me.

Now I see how alike we are.

Two lost souls.

You said you found your family.

I said I felt like I found my family.

You have to listen.

We can work on that.

Mercedes and Beth believe that you're dead.

They'll... they'll be so happy.

I want to be there when you tell them...

That's not gonna happen, Waverly.

Those things that look like Mercedes and Beth?

Aren't. It's gonna sound crazy,

but inhuman creatures,

demons, took their place.

- They're possessed? - No.

The creatures have their own bodies.

So your real sisters are OK?

Hey, it's OK! Look, I'm not gonna hurt you.

I think one is still hanging on...

But without a face, what's a girl to do?

Man...

You're right. It's not funny.

If these new sisters are so wonderful,

why would fake your death? Because it turns out

they were the fakers.

All their praise, approval.

All lies.

You wouldn't use me like that, would you?

Never.

I'm gonna get you out of here.

Whoa. OK.

Hey, listen.

I'm gonna get you out of here, OK?

I'll be back.

We don't need anyone else.

We'll be each other's family.

That's so sweet.

- Shoot. - What?

Well, my... my old family.

Wynonna. She'll...

She'll look for me, right?

She'll never stop.

But if... if I call her

and tell her that I'm going out of town for a while, then...

we won't have to be fugitives.

You're a clever girl.

One call.

I'll be listening.

I can smell you. More Burberry,

less burntinachurch than you'd hoped?

Didn't know your department delivered. Fantastic.

- I'm starving. - Ooh, is that why

you killed Tucker? 'Cause you couldn't barbecue us,

so you got yourself a kids' meal?

Why does everyone assume it was me?

Surrender now and I might give you some leniency.

Like the time Black Badge kept us in a box?

I heard that we piped in some pretty good muzak.

- Don't mock me. - Where's your sister?

Give her up, I might be able to provide

some sanctuary.

- Tempting... but no. - You said you'd do

anything, you'd give anything to ensure my happiness.

You are one greedy girl.

You! Yeah, I saw who you were! You're a cruel, hard man

whose pleasures came from other people's pain.

Sometimes I think you really must hate me.

Sometimes I do.

Give me the God damn ring.

Voicemail.

Hey, sis.

Things with Nicole are a bit tense

so I'm... gonna skip town.

Do some soulsearching.

I might not see you for a while.

I love you, Wynonna.

We should go.

Wait. Um...

Wait. Can we go to my jeep first?

I... Well, I need some clothes.

I can buy you anything.

Maybe some more modest skirts.

Your hemline's been creeping up over the years.

Wrong, DoucheB.

If a girl wants to flash some thigh, ain't no one's business but her own.

You're alive!

Funny thing about being a revenant.

It's really hard to get dead.

When my husband rises

he will rule with me by his side

in my true form, feeding off the vassals

eternally bound to serve him.

Including you. I'm not much of a joiner.

Say goodbye, Agent Dolls.

Bye.

It worked! This is the vapour guard

I've been working on. You know, with it I can...

Shitcrumbs.

Dude, next time I say

stay in the truck,

- Go ahead and shoot me! - Come on!

What are you so afraid of? Damn it, woman, I just

told you to shoot me. Doc, listen to me!

If I don't break the seal, the Widows will find it

and they will kill you anyway.

Fine!

I always knew you'd be the death of me anyway!

Somebody's a little

overdressed for dinner. Sorry,

we already have a Dolls.

You were right.

Demonic forces are drawn to the seal.

Those things I said...

- Yeah, I meant what I said too. - But it was the doll

that made us say them aloud. Was it?

Doc, this is...

it's about something bigger than us.

- The demon Clootie. - Our baby.

I mean, I need to do that on my own terms,

but I promise I won't

break the seal. Not until after.

We... we need a plan.

But when that plan is in place,

I will break it... with you

by my side.

Do you swear?

I do.

You kept the receipt, right?

Brother.

It's time to come home.

You truly love that girl, don't you?

She's my angel.

There is something. She's special.

Too special for an abomination like you.

Betrayal has consequences, Tucker.

You wanted a girl?

Well, I'll be your girl.

I have been arrogant.

When I first stepped out of that box...

The freedom!

Now Beth has abandoned me, my craft has faded.

Please. Please,

I just need one more miracle.

Myself to you

I eternally give.

Blood from myself

spilled as I live.

Reveal to me

the seal of three.

Command you by these rings.

Be you forever my King.

Husband,

grant that which I seek!

Constance's seal.

The deed shall be done.

I swear it.

It is the law.

You know, you lock shit up, you think that people would

stay out of it. What, boyfriend people?

Decidedly nonboyfriend people.

Never mind.

Either stop staring at me like a midway attraction,

or ponyup five bucks for admission.

Sorry, that's rude.

OK. Here's to you,

who saved my life.

Who... happens to be a...

Say it.

A r... revenant.

God, that's so weird!

You're just such an awesome person.

So, you gonna give me a head start?

Before you tell Wynonna about me.

No, I don't...

I'm not going to.

Because then I'd have to tell her about me.

What, that you're annoyingly sweet?

I think I'm half revenant.

Wow, that's the first time I've said it

out loud to... anyone.

Even Nicole?

God! Nicole...

That text was so nasty.

She's going to need some space.

Screw space. Look, you need to get up

in her face and make things right. I gave a guy

space once. Took up with his best friend.

And that friend was on Wyatt's shitlist.

Yeah. Worst second date ever.

Do you think she's up yet?

Ms. Pleatinherpants is probably doing a sun salutation as we speak.

But she'll open the door for you.

No matter what time.

Waves?