All language subtitles for Angel on My Shoulder (1946) [1080p] [BluRay] [YTS.MX]

Okay, Eddie,
you're on your own.

Oh, come on, son. After four years, can't you
favor us a smile on your graduation day?

Hi, Eddie!

Hi, Smiley.

What's the matter, Boss?
Couldn't you tear yourself away?

How was the stretch
this time, Boss? Tough?

No.

Which is why I didn't
crash out like always.

I was sure
expecting you to.

Nice car.

It's all yours.

Ours.

Everything we've got.

You're a swell pal, Eddie.

Yeah, I've heard all about it.

You've done a good job
while I was gone,

and I ain't forgetting it.

I did big, Eddie.

You're a lot richer than
when you went in.

We're a lot richer.

Thanks, Eddie.

Oh, I forgot to tell you. We got
a couple of new spots downtown.

Real classy.

I got the guy waiting
to show you the books.

I'll take your word for it

like always.

'Cause we got troubles, too.

I'll take care of the troubles.

Like when we were kids.

Me and you against
everybody, eh, Smiley?

Sure.

Got my rod?

Wearing it right
next to my heart.

Let me have it.

Sure.

I just can't understand it.

I'm walking down the street
minding my own business.

I step off the curb. Car comes tearing
around the corner against the red light.

The cop should have picked up
the driver of that car, not me.

Say, are you a trustee?

Yes.

How long have you
been in this stir?

Three hundred odd years.

Gosh, it's hot here.

Gets like this
in Florida sometimes.

Florida?

Florida never
smelled like this.

Like rotten eggs.

Precisely, young man,
rotten eggs.

The unpleasant odor
is caused by H₂SO₄,

Hydrogen sulfuric acid.

The most common compound
of hydrogen and sulfur.

Am I right?

I poisoned my wife
with a sulfur compound.

My young wife,

she was unfaithful.

I was a chemist.

What do you mean...

...was?

Before they hanged me.

Where are the rope marks?

Young man, what is the last thing you
remember before they brought you here?

Smiley.

Smiley.

That slimy
double-crossing rat

bludgeon me with
my own rod.

Where are the
bullet holes?

Where?

How do you like that?

He missed.

Sitting right next to me,
and he missed.

He didn't miss.

You're dead.

Huh?

We're all dead.

Listen to this marv,
will you?

It's true.

Only the soul
exists down here.

Jeez.

I always said
I'd wind up down here.

Look, I don't care
where I am.

I got to get Smiley.

There must be some
way across this camp!

Abandon hope, all ye
who enter here.

Lay off of me,
Screw!

Lay off of me,
will you?

I got to get out
of here.

I'm getting Smiley!

Lay off me, I tell you!

I got to get Smiley!

Brrrr.

What sort of
temperature is that?

It's the labor
shortage, Sire.

Especially the boiler
room personnel.

There's been
a fearful drop.

We're operating
at .73% of normal.

You want me to catch
my death of cold?

No, Sire.

We're short of
condemned souls.

I objectively suggest—

Warden, I have no need
of your infantile suggestions.

I'll attend to this
matter myself.

My opponent is always with some
favored mortal of his testing my prowess.

This time it happens to be
one Judge Frederick Parker...

of the New World.

Oh, we'll see who
goes down in defeat.

My beloved Sire, your powers
are wondrous to behold.

But I have lately been
beset by great problems.

My adversary is
working overtime.

That superior though
he may be,

and though he's set up a thousand
Judge Parkers to thwart me,

he must recognize
that I am still Master...

of my own sphere.

I did it, Sire.

- (Man yelling)

What in my domain
is that?

- You have no right to--

- Help!

Let go of me,
you dirty coppers!

I'll get every
one of you!

Quiet!

You can't hold
me here!

You can't keep me!
I'll--

What's the meaning of this?
How dare you bring him here!

We had no choice, Warden.

Cast him down
into the boiler room

in the 55th circle
of darkness.

I apologize for the intrusion, Sire.

Not at all, Warden.

Pour me a drink.

You're not angry?

Angry? On the contrary,
I'm very pleased.

In fact,
I'm delighted.

To— What was his name?

You mean, the doomed soul
that was here? Kagle, Eddie Kagle?

Eddie Kagle.

You drink to him?

A cheap gangster?

Why not?

I love him.

Ever see that
face before?

Of course.

It was just here
in this room, Eddie Kagle.

Wrong, Warden.

That happens to be a picture
of Judge Frederick Parker.

Impossible.

- They look exactly—
- Precisely.

They look exactly alike.

And this likeness is just the weapon
I need to defeat Mr. Parker.

Eddie Kagle.

How hot do they
want it down here?

Never gets hot enough
to suit the boss.

You think this is bad? Wait until they stick you
in one of them hot clay pits way down below.

You mean, we ain't
at bottom now?

There ain't no bottom
in this joint.

Back to work!
Back!

Back to your work!

I ain't taking
this no longer.

I'm crashing out
of this college.

Nobody crashes
out of here.

Nobody but Eddie Kagle.

He breaks out
from every place.

- I'll crash out
with you, Eddie.

Who are you?

- A pal.

I don't like pals.

You mean,
like Smiley?

How do you know
about Smiley?

Grapevine.

I can help you
get him.

I got somebody
I want to get, too.

- We can help
each other.

- Is it a deal?

We got to crash first.

I know how.

Next,

the Screws.

Well, Eddie?

Okay.

Watch your step. One false
move and I slug you.

I'll be extremely careful.

Rub that smile
off your mouth.

A guy smiled once
when he plucked me.

Certainly.

Come on. Now.

Hey,

you don't stern out for something.

- That's the furnace.
- It's the only way.

Come on.

How long have you
been down here?

Since time immemorial.

The way you talk, you must
have had a good education.

The most liberal one.

I only went to third grade.

I went through the whole gamut
of learning. I know everything.

Stuck on yourself, huh?

What's your name?

Well, I have a number of aliases. I have a long
record under the name of Mephistopheles.

Greek, huh?

Well, there are some who claim
I'm more of one nation than another,

but that's not true, Eddie. I am
of all nations. I claim no favorites.

You look like a con man.
Look, Mephistopheles—

Call me Nick.

You married?

Millions of women
have adored me.

Quite a guy with
the ladies, huh?

I'm a fascinating fellow.

Look, I ain't playing around
with dangerous dynamite.

But delightful
dynamite, Eddie.

Live fully while you may,
and reckon not the cost.

Deny yourself nothing.
Fame and blaze like a torch,

and toss the part about you.

I'll make the most
of what we yet may spin...

before we, too,
into the dust, descend.

Your talkin' screwy.

Is it alright
if I laugh occasionally?

There ain't nothing
to laugh about.

I never saw nothing to laugh
about my whole life.

There was a time I left school and ran away from
home when I caught my folks was always drunken.

What I've been doing is try to be
somebody, and I did pretty good.

Worked myself up from where I had nothing to eat
and no place to sleep to top guy in my business.

Splendid. You're a man
after my own heart.

I wish the world was
filled with Eddies.

How long is it going to take
us to get up there?

Any moment now.

Alright, down there,
send it up.

Phew! Old man Schmalhausen
must be baking with rotten eggs.

Smells like the Devil,
too, doesn't it?

Wow, them ashes
are still hot.

Hey, Janitor. Dash them ashes with
water before you send them up.

Hey, I don't feel nothing.

Of course not.
You haven't got a body.

I ain't got no body? How am
I supposed to get Smiley?

Hey, you muggler, look
at what you're doing!

No one can see you or hear
you until I find you a body.

Now, come on, Eddie.

How are you
gonna find it?

Well,

everyone has his
physical counterpart,

his double.

I happen to know
where your double is.

You mean a guy
which looks like me?

A spitting image.

But suppose he doen't
want to give me his body.

He'll be asleep.

He won't have anything
to say about it.

What happens when
he wakes up?

When he wakes up,
he'll be you.

And who will I be?

You'll be him.

Huh?

To everyone else, you'll be him.
Our course, to yourself, you'll be yourself.

Oh.

Hey,

give me that again,
will you?

Ah, stop worrying about it, Eddie.
Leave everything to me.

I'm leaving nothing
to you, con man.

I'm sorry, Eddie. It's this cold air.
It makes me irritable.

I don't like
cold climates.

I don't feel nothing.

And if you ain't got no body neither,
how come you feel cold?

I've been down below so long that even
my soul has gotten accustomed to the heat.

Hey,

if I ain't got no body,
I ain't got no fingers, right?

Right.

No fingers, no fingerprints, right?

Right.

I can get away with murder.

Not exactly.

Without fingers, you cannot
squeeze a trigger.

Yeah.

I'd sure wanna
squeeze a trigger.

Hey!

What is this,
a double cross?

This ain't St. Louie.

Smiley is in St. Louie.

The body we want
is here,

and don't you forget, you have
a little job to do for me first.

That was our deal.

Okay.

I ain't reneging.

Come on.

Criminal Court Building

Hey!

What's the idea of
bringing me here?

I've got to get you the fingers
to squeeze that trigger.

How do you figure you're getting
into the criminal court?

How did I figure getting you
out of that jam down below?

But I did.

Yeah.

That was neat.

This will be even neater.

Trust me.

Okay.

Let's go.

There ain't a seat
in the joint.

Let's sit here.

What's the matter with you?
There's cops in them seats.

Hmm, they won't mind.
They won't even know.

- Your Honor,

- the defendant of this case
has failed to establish an alibi.

- The testimony conclusively proves that
this man was at the scene of the crime

- and at the exact time
it was committed.

- Therefore, I respectfully
request the court—

That's a lie! I'm not going
to take any more of this!

Get a doctor, quick.

What happened?

He collapsed, Eddie.

No judge ever
passed out on me.

- This court is now
adjourned.

Come on, Eddie.
Let's go.

Hey,

don't give me
no orders.

I do all the leading.

Get me?

Yes, Eddie.

Don't you never forget.

I'm boss.

Yes, Eddie.

I shouldn't have
been so brusque.

I've given him a sedative. Let him
sleep a while. Then, get him home.

He'll be alright.

Sure, Doctor.

Alright, gentlemen.

He smokes.

I told you I knew
where your double was.

If this guy had hung around St. Louis,
he'd have gotten bumped instead of me.

Too bad he didn't.

Is he the guy
you wanna get?

Yeah.

What'd he do to you?
Send you up?

I was sent down,

not up.

Hey,

this guy's a judge.

I ain't muscling in
on no judge's body.

What difference
does it make?

It will serve
your purpose

and mine.

Yeah.

What happens when
he gets up and

finds I'm him?

When we're through with him,
he won't know a thing.

Not a single blip,

solitary thing.

What about you?

Ain't you gonna find
yourself a body?

Yeah, I'll get one.

But you first,

you're the important one.

Yeah,

and don't you forget it.

I won't forget it,
Eddie.

Hurry up.

Whatcha doing?

Fusion, Eddie.

The power of heat.

I'll fuse you into this man
as steel can be fused into steel.

Relax.

Relax.

Oh, Albert.

Yes, Doctor?

Ms. Foster still here?

Yes, sir, she's making coffee.

Oh my,

may I inquire how
the judge is, sir?

Oh, a good night's rest
and he'll be alright.

Oh, that's good.

Run down to the druggist, will you, and
get this sedative just in case he wakes up.

Yes, Doctor,

it'll be ready for him.

Is he still sleeping?

Yes.

There you are.

Well, thanks.

Nothing serious,
I hope, Matt.

Excellent.

No, I don't think so.

However, I've been expecting
this for some time.

Why do you say that?

One can only do so much,
especially one of Fred's temperament.

When he awakes in the morning, I suggest you pile him
into his car, and get him away for a couple weeks.

I'm only the judge's
secretary, not his wife.

That ring means everything
you soon will be.

I can't possibly
go away now.

Why?

Well, with the election
only a few days off,

his speech in the
auditorium tomorrow.

Now, Barbara. You've always
had your own way,

I suppose
you will now.

That's not fair, Matt.

Nobody can stop, Fred.
Nobody can push him on.

I'm the last one who wants
to see him hurt or sick.

You believe that,
don't you?

Of course.

I'll bring him to your office
first thing in the morning.

No, no.

That wouldn't do,
at all.

Not all people are ready to accept psychiatry
as a normal branch of medicine.

The general impression is a man who
needs a psychiatrist must be crazy.

Ridiculous, of course,
but there you are.

Some people are rather reluctant
to cast their votes for lunatics.

I hadn't noticed.

It'd be better
if I came here.

- Goodbye, Barbara.

Goodbye, Matt.

Uh, Albert?

Yes, Miss Ratliffe?

I'm going home,

and if the judge awakens
during the night,

please call me.

Yes, Miss Ratliffe.

Judge.

Police say your appointment
is for nine sharp.

Judge!

Your Honor!

I hated to wake you, Sir.
You were sleeping so peacefully.

He did it.

I got them.

But what, Sir?

You got one, too.

I hope so, Sir.

I can feel myself.

I'm solid.

Solid, like I used to be.

Are you quite alright, Sir?

Alright? Sure, I'm alright.

Ni--

Nick—
Where's Nick?

Hey, hey. Hey!
Where are you?

Hey, Nick!

Did Nick sleep here, too?

I'm afraid I don't
follow you, Sir.

You better not.

I don't like
being followed.

Who are you, anyway?

Uh, really, Sir?

Then tell me or
do I slap it out of you.

I know, but your man-servant.

And if you'd pardon me,
your bath is ready, Sir.

I don't need
no bath.

They cleaned me up good
when they let me out.

Where's his duds?

I beg your pardon?

His duds, his rags, clothes?

Whose clothes, Sir?

The judge's! I've got to get dressed
and get to St. Louis quick.

What am I, a judge
or an undertaker?

And you got nothin'
with fancy stripes?

Fancy stripes?

Oh, never mind.
I'll wear one of these.

- Alright, you double crosser.

- I'm comin' for ya.

Here you are, Sir.

What are you
gonna do?

Help you into
them, Sir.

Scram.

- But Sir, I— I—
- Scram!

Yes, Sir.

Hello, Ms. Barbara?

This is Albert.

I-I don't wish to alarm you,

but the judge is definitely
not himself this morning.

I'm terribly worried
for him.

Oh, that'll be splendid.

And do hurry, please.

Thank you.

- Hey, you!

You.

Yes, sir.

Get me a ticket on the
next plane to St. Louis.

But, sir, you—

You work here,
don't you?

Well really.

- For a good many years.
- Well, get it.

But your appointment, Sir!

I got an appointment
at St. Louis,

which comes first.

Plane reservations
are hard to get,

especially on such
short notice.

Okay,

call the airport and get me
a special plane, all for myself.

Come ooon.

Hey.

If I need some dough,
is there any around?

It's the usual place, Sir.

Don't give me no double talk.
Where's the dough?

In the safe, Sir.

I don't see
no safe.

If I seem
to be baffled—

Will you shut up and
do what I tell you?

Where's the strong box.

Behind the picture, Sir.

There's a flock
of pictures.

The one with
the boat, Sir.

The button, Sir.

Got any sandpaper?

Have you forgotten
the combination?

I don't need no combination.
This is duck soup.

Oh please, Sir.

Hey,

where's the nearest
hard shop?

You can't possibly leave
town today, Sir.

Hello, Eddie.

How'd you get here?

I never explain
my actions.

Then explain to me,
I don't like no surprises.

I have many more surprises in store for you
if you try to run out on me again.

I ain't running out
on nothin'.

I'm just hoppin' over to St. Louis
to take care of that rat.

That rat can wait.
Parker comes first.

Ah, being up so high
makes me uncomfortable.

I'm much happier
down below.

Yeah, huh?

I appall altitudes.

Hey, what's that?

Engine trouble, Sir. We'll have
to go back to the fields.

What a strange
coincidence.

Wipe that smile
off your mug.

I apologize,
most completely.

Are you sure
he said St. Louis?

Yes, Ms. Barbara.

St. Louis.

St. Louis!

I can't imagine what
could take him there!

At a time like this, with
a thousand things to do!

You should've done
something, Albert.

Phone me, or-or stopped
him, or something!

I tried to,
Ms. Barbara.

But he gave me a push,
and out he went!

Well, that's
ridiculous!

The judge is gentility itself.
He never pushed anybody.

He never did any of the things
he did this morning.

From the first time he awakened,
he-- he acted peculiarly.

Go on.

When I went to help
him dress, he uh,

he told me
to scram!

The judge said
"scram"?

That was the very word
he used, Ms. Barbara.

Are you certain you weren't
having hallucinations, Albert?

I only wish that were true,
it's been most disturbing.

I would've called Dr. Higgins,
but I didn't have the opportunity.

Well, I'll call
him now.

Very good,
Ms. Barbara.

Hello,
Doctor Higgins, please.

This is Barbara Foster.

Not a word
to anybody, Albert.

Oh, heavens no, Ms—

Hello, Matt.

Look I'm at Fred's.

No, he isn't here!

He took a plane
for St. Louis.

That's extraordinary.

Well.

Don't be unduly alarmed, it may
be only a passing aberration.

We'll see when
he gets back.

Let me know the
moment he arrives.

And let me warn you,
Barbara.

No matter how strange he acts,
don't antagonize him.

Humor him,
indulge him.

Now we are dealing
with someone who's ill,

perhaps very ill.

Now you understand,
don't you, Barbara?

The important thing
is patience.

I understand, Matt,

goodbye.

Well, Albert...

we must be very
patient with him.

We will,
Ms. Barbara.

Remember now,
not a word to a soul.

Your Honor, did you uh,
miss your plane?

Yeah.

Albert,
who is it?

The judge
is back.

Darling!

Darling, I was so worried
about you.

Who's the dame?

Your fiancée.

The girlfriend.

Or rather...
the judge's.

- Come on Eddie, make the
most of it. She's all yours.

Heeey,

this is okay.

It ain't only a trigger
I can squeeze.

My Darling, you've never
talked like that before.

Why are you
staring at me?

Just sizing
you up.

Not bad.

Plenty of curves, and
all in the right places.

Come here,
Babe.

Please, Darling.

You don't have
to be afraid of me.

How about me and
you stepping out tonight?

'Been a long time.

Please, Fred.

Fred?

You're Fred.

- Oh that's the judge's handle.
- Mm-hmm.

Who are you
talking to, Dear?

Nick.

Oh.

Nick.

Beat it.

Scram!

Yes, Sir.

Fred, you never
talk to Albert—

No matter what I never, there's gonna be lots
of things you ain't never seen the judge do.

Better get
used to it.

Yes Dear,
I'll-- I'll try.

Oh please, Fred.
You're hurting me!

Heeey! Playing hard
to get, eh?

What's so funny?

Sorry, Eddie. Sorry.

So, what's your name?

Oh really, Fred?

What's your name?

Now you certainly
know my name.

I wouldn't ask
if I knowed.

I'll call you a Rosie.

Rosie?!

Yeah,

a little number I used
to run around with.

Built just like you.

Come on, come on.
Relax...

I ain't such
a bad guy.

Now stop it, Fred!

Hey who you
yellin' at?

I'm sorry, Dear.

Okay.

You'll be late.

I got lots of time.

Of course, but you're doing the
auditorium to deliver your speech.

Come again?

Your speech, Dear.
It's getting late.

I do all my speechin'
with my rod.

- I want you to make
this speech, Eddie.

- I'll be behind you,

whispering
in your ear.

- It's all part
of the plan.

Hey, I think you're doing
a little too much planning.

On second thought, Dear, maybe
it'd be best if we postponed it.

What do you mean best? If I gotta
make a speech, I'll make it.

It'll smell,
but it's okay.

Perhaps you better
take a few days rest.

I'll call the campaign
committee and explain.

What's the matter,
what's the matter?

You think
I can't do it?

I know you
can, only—

Only nothin'!

I can do anything
I put my mind on.

Of course!

Where do we go?

The auditorium.

Come on,

we'll give it to 'em good.

C'mon, Nick.

Just who is Nick?

Just a con man I'm tied in with.

Boy, we ain't been forgotten
by Lady Luck like I thought.

Judge Parker
collapsed on bench.

Now, ain't that just
too bad?

And listen
to this editorial.

"Dare we leave the helm of our ship in the hands
of a man whose physical condition is in question?"

"Now? In the stormiest period
in our state's history?"

Certainly not.

And as patriotic citizens, we gotta
do something about this situation.

Yeah.

Now, back in St. Louis—

Never mind St. Louis,
Shaggsy.

Whatever you did in your hometown,
we'd do it better here.

The point is, we've got to see
that the judge stays sick.

We gotta see that this condition
maybe even gets worse.

Sure, Boss.
That's the idea.

Now, we've the judge hanging on the ropes.
Now we gotta deliver the K.O.

Yeah.

All of which is only to protect
the people, mind you.

Now, with our boy,

people can go about their business
in the pursuit of happiness,

which is coming to them,
without worry.

Sure.
Without worrying.

That's right.

Now, we're speaking
at the auditorium at two.

That'll give you
plenty of time.

Put on a good show,
Shaggsy.

One more cave in like he had
in court yesterday and...

And we'll be dusting off
the governor's chair for our boy.

Come on, boys.

Wait a minute.

Hello?

Hello, Sweetheart.

My wife, go ahead.

And remember, I want to hear that the judge
has taken a turn for the worst.

We'll bring back
his teeth.

Come on.

"A Vote for Parker is a Vote for Yourself
Sponsored by the Citizen's Better Government Committee"

- Hey...

- imagine me
running for governor.

Oh Darling,
you're too modest.

Come on, let's go
on the stage.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.
I want to case the joint first.

Hey...
Look at that turnout.

Hey, what are you going
backwards for?

Stick close.

You're giving me the words,
remember?

Oh there is His Honor now,
excuse me.

Hey, where are you?

Please, Darling.

Well, Your Honor,
we're all ready to start.

Where is Nick?

They're waiting.

Let 'em wait.

Hey,

where did he go?

There's someone
with His Honor?

I'm sure we can
find him a seat.

Oh, that'll be fine.

Darling. Darling.

Please, Darling,
everyone's waiting.

I need Nick to help me
with the words.

You have your speech
right here.

Have a seat, Judge. I was
getting a little worried about you.

Children...
you're all ready.

Now it's time,
go ahead.

Your Honor?

Stand up, Dear.

"Your Honor, on behalf of all the boys
and girls and members of the club" ...

"and in gratitude for all
you have done for them,"

"regardless of who
they are" ...

"Regardless of who
they are..."

- And where they
come from.

"And where they come from,
we want to present you with" ...

I lost-ed it.

Look in this pocket.

Whoa!
There it is!

Jeez.

"This watch."

Thank the children,
Darling.

Thanks kids.

You're welcome,
Your Honor.

Alright, children.
Moving this way.

Fellow Americans,

as the campaign for governor of this
great state goes into its final phase,

it is an honor and a privilege
to speak once again

in behalf of the candidate of the Citizens
of Better Government Committee,

Judge Frederick Parker.

Judge Parker
Youth Movement

The whole country knows of the
famous Parker Youth Foundation

created by our candidate
10 years ago.

This one organization
has reduced juvenile crime

97%
since it was found.

Because Judge Parker
is a man who understands

that juvenile delinquency is not
a matter of bad boys and good boys

but rather a matter of bad
conditions and good conditions,

he is a man revered
and loved by his friends,

respected and feared
by his enemies.

A man of
countless virtues.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

as we have just seen, one of Judge Parker's
numerous virtues is his modesty.

What's the idea,
letting me down?

I'm not letting you down.
Far from it.

What about this?

Throw it away.

Go out there
and tell 'em off.

Tell 'em off.
What do I say?

Surely I don't have
to tell you that.

These people sent you
to prison, Eddie.

They're your enemies.

"For thou shall not gang."
The Law-and-Order Brigade—

—They hate you.

They've always
hated you.

Now is your chance to tell them
what you think of them.

- You're not afraid...
- I ain't afraid of nothin'.

Then go out there
and give it to them.

Call them by their
right names—

- Call them every name
you can think of. - Yeah.

It is my privilege to introduce
the next Governor of this great state,

Judge Frederick Parker.

I'll tell them.

Listen!
All of you!

I'm gonna tell ya
a few things.

You're--

Hey you!

He's using jiu jitsu.

Stop it, Eddie, stop it.
They're your friends.

They are crazy.

See that?

Take it, Eddie. Take it.

It's not you they're after.
It's the judge.

Yeah, but I'm getting
the punches.

But you're making
a hero of the judge.

You want 'em to make
mince meat of me?

Idiot.

Beat it, beat it!

On your feet, get out
of here, get going.

No I won't need that now,
Mr. Kramer, thank you.

Are you hurt very much, Your Honor?

Nah.

Sure you're
alright, Dear?

You able to walk?

Sure! Sure.

Gee, judge, Your Honor.
You're a champ.

May I kiss you?

The judge don't want
girls to kiss him.

You go right ahead, Dear,
if you want to.

Come on, Babe.

Hey,

where's Nick?

Oh never mind,
Nick now, Dear. Please.

Well he was with—

Albert, get me some antiseptics
and bandages quickly.

Yes, Ms. Barbara.

Darling, you were
magnificent.

But you know you weren't
cut out for that sort of thing.

You know somebody who
could've done it better?

No, Dear.

But I'm afraid of the after-effects.
I know you're going to be ill.

Hey, I've ain't never
been sick in my life.

Fred, you were just—

I'm glad Nick
ain't here.

Darling... what's come
over you?

What's this?
Hey!

Take that junk
out of here.

And get me
a drink.

The mineral water,
Sir?

I said a drink—

bourbon.

Fred, you don't drink.

You just watch me.

And some cigars.

But Fred, you can't smoke
or drink. You know that.

Are you kidding?

What are you
standing there for?

Get.

Darling, please.
You'll only make yourself ill.

Stop worrying,
Rosie.

Hey, how about some
smooching.

Darling...
you have changed.

Want a shot?

I wish you wouldn't, Dear. You've had
enough excitement for one day.

I ain't started, yet.

Take a powder.

Take a powder, Sir?

Oh, you mean scram.

Here's luck, Rosie.

Be careful, Dear.

I can do this
all day.

That's funny, I've never
choked on this before.

What kind of a body
did that lug slip me, anyhow?

I better have Albert
put you to bed.

Hey, wa—

I ain't sleepy.

You feel good.

I've got to get
home, Dear.

Home?

Don't you
live here?

You know perfectly well,
I don't live here.

The judge must be
screwy or something.

You ain't going
home, Rosie.

I am going home,
and the sooner the better.

Wait a minute,
wait, hey—

Darling!

Uh... Oh, Fred,
I told you.

That's alright.
I'm alright.

You don't have
to worry about me.

I'm— I've nothing
in my way.

I feel fine.

Ms. Barbara!
What happened?

His Honor
just passed out.

Taxi?

Yes, Ma'am.

Hey, what's the idea?

Get back in your cab
or I'll slug you.

Ahhh,
don't get excited.

Come on.

No, Eddie.
Let's take this one.

Criminal court,
please.

Yes, Ma'am.

I have the the sworn affidavits and depositions
for those witnesses in Chicago.

They came in the mail
this morning.

What witnesses?
What's all this about?

Chicago should be pretty familiar to you. I understand
your bosom pal has opened a couple of night spots there.

You mean Smiley?

Who's Smiley dear? I don't see
his name in these documents.

When I'm finished with him, the only place
you'll find his name will be on a tombstone.

Well what is he to do
with the Bentley trial?

I don't know no Bentley.
All I know—

It's Bentley trial, dear.

The case you're hearing
in court today.

Don't worry, Eddie.
I'll be there.

This gives you
another go at Parker.

You be sure you don't
bungle it this time.

Sure, sure. I know
all about trials.

So do you, bub.

Are you talking
to the cab driver, dear?

Keep your eye front.
You want us to get killed?

Sorry, Your Honor.

Dear, listen to me.

I was talking
to Doctor Higgins.

- He said— - Listen, Rosie.
I'm handling it my way.

First, comes Bentley,

- then, comes that St. Louis, two faced,
double crossing, back stabbing— - Fred!

I'll show you a few tricks on how to get Smiley.
Tricks you'd never even dreamed of.

Sure, sure. I go through
with the trial in nothing flat.

And then, we shoot
out to St. Louis.

What will we do
in St. Louis, dear?

Not you, just us.

Not— Not me?

Just us?

Oh, Darling. You frighten
me when you talk like this.

It is strictly between
me and Smiley.

We're going south
together.

On— On a vacation?

To Florida?

Further south.

It's a hundred-times
hotter.

Boss, I tell you, them's
his honest own words...

...and get this,

he said he was going to rush through with
the trial and hop to St. Louis to get Smiley!

That's dangerous talk for a judge and
a gubernatorial candidate to make.

You sure
you heard right?

You're positive?

Yeah, he called him a double-
crossing, back-stabber,

who's running a racket
with the judge's dough.

Nice work, Jim.

Boys, we're in.

The honorable judge just put
himself right out of the running.

Shaggsy, that hunch
of yours was right.

This judge not only
looks like Eddie,

he's the biggest two-timing, double-crossing
candidate that ever ran for office.

He's even worse
than our own man.

You calling the judge?

I'm calling Smiley.

This looks like what they put on a guy
when giving a neck tie party.

Now tell me the rap
on these Bentleys.

Attempted murder.

Mrs. Bentley and her husband tried
to kill her father and collect his insurance.

- One of them
things, eh? - Mm-hmm.

They pushed him in front
of a subway train.

But they bungled it,
the fools.

The old man's alive,
but somewhat mangled.

The entire country is shocked
by the ugliness of it.

Somehow they fail
to see any beauty in it.

What chance they got?

Judge Parker?
None.

Or they wouldn't have spent all that money
trying to square things before coming up to trial.

Did they try to get
to judge Parker?

No, no, no, no.

They wouldn't do that.

They know it's impossible
to fix Judge Parker.

But Eddie Kagle,
now...

Hey, who's spreading
the dough?

A man known
as Big Harry.

Oh, what's his
last name?

I can't look up
no Big Harry.

I want to call him up and have him
come here quick before the trial.

No, he's too smart
for that.

- Then, what'll I do?

Well, you just dial
Spring 74242.

I'll guide you.
A little...

...telepathic
transmission.

Always showin' off
with them big words.

I used to dish out plenty of dough
myself when I put in a fix.

Now is my chance to get
some of it back.

Twenty five grand ain't enough
to fix a rap like what this is.

- Why it's— it's...
- Heinous?

It's heinous.

- The whole country
is aroused by it.

Yeah, it's aroused
the whole country.

- But Your Honor...
uh...

As is the case of the People
vs Mitchell 186 New York 942.

Like in the case of the People
vs Mitchell 186 New York 942.

They got 30 years.

You don't want the Bentleys
to do a thirty-year hitch, do you?

No, Your Honor. But...

If you'll only be reasonable.
Let me bring the Bentleys in.

Mmm...

So you can have witnesses
for the fix, huh?

No, Your Honor. I just— just
want you to see them and...

- ...and have them say a word
of their own defense— - Wait.

Put the moolah
on the desk, first.

Your Honor, this is
Mr. and Mrs. Bentley.

They will tell you that this whole affair was
merely the result of a tragic misunderstanding.

This fine, upstanding citizen...

...and this frail, innocent,
law-abiding, little lady,

who were simply
victims of circumstance.

As a result of which, Mrs. Bentley has been
under the constant care of her physician.

She's lost weight.
She's been unable to—

Rosie.

Rosie Morgan.

It can't be.

You was bumped.

You was bumped!

You didn't wait long to get
hooked up with this lug, did you?

- Your Honor—
- Shut up.

Easy, Eddie.
Don't ruin everything.

You shut up, too.

All them trips to Kansas City to see
your poor, old, crippled mother.

And you!

- Your Honor,
get hold of yourself.

So, this was your
mother, huh?

You little two-timer. Playing
around with him all the time.

But I got ya now.

When the trial starts...

I'll throw the book at you. I'll give you the works.
I'll sort you and him away for keeps.

(Rosie screams)

- Your Honor,
the court is ready sir.

Here's your dough. You can't
fix this rap. Not for a million.

Not for all the dough
in the country.

- Your Honor, they trying
to bribe you? - Ha-ha-ha.

Imagine!

Wait til I tell the story
to the Press, Your Honor.

After this, you're a cinch to
sit in the governor's chair.

Heeey...

Don't you never
say "chair" to me.

Oh, I'm sorry,
Your Honor.

You fool.

You unmitigated,
abysmal fool.

If you had a body,
I'd tear it apart.

Good thing you can
do that trick.

You should see him.
He's gotten worse.

He's somebody
I don't know anymore.

What is it Matt?
What's happened to Fred?

It isn't as simple as diagnosing
a case of measles.

No, thank you.

Could be throwback
to his formative years.

His young years,
his boyhood years when he

lived in the slums.

But what caused it?

Fear probably.

Of what?

Well, he might be afraid of the
high office he's running for.

Fear to being elected.

Fear of the responsibilities
it might mean.

Fear of loving
a woman like you.

A woman like me?

- Yes.

Barbara.

I think Fred's withdrawn
from the campaign.

- Are you serious?

Deadly serious.

But you can't be. He's as good
as elected right now.

- Yes, I know.

He'll be alright.

He's got to be.

He's got to be
governor.

From judge's secretary
to governor's wife. Not bad.

Why, Matt!

Barbara.

We've been friends
for a long time.

You're the loveliest girl
I've ever known.

You're also the
most ambitious.

Yes, Matt.

I am.

See, I'm not
a psychiatrist.

I don't know much about
neurotic conditions.

But I do know that what
Fred is doing, he must do.

Psychiatry won't give a lot of poor kids a chance
to grow up like decent human beings.

Fred Parker will.

Psychiatry won't wipe out the
vicious elements in this world.

But the influence of
Governor Parker will.

And this ambitious wench, Barbara Foster,
is going to help him do it.

I'm sorry, Barbara.

I guess I was
mistaking you.

Forgive me?

I'm sorry, too.

I'm sorry that a man like Fred has
to pay for all this with his health.

But I...

Well, perhaps
it'll work out.

As a matter of fact, his condition
may pass as quickly as it came.

But he must be handled with
patience and understanding.

It's going to be
difficult for you.

Nothing is difficult
where Fred is concerned.

If you could possibly get him away for
a short while, it would help enormously.

I'll do my best.

Good.

Still friends?

Of course.

Always.

Goodbye, Matt.

Lovely, isn't she?

Go ahead, Eddie. Make the
most of it, she's all yours.

Nah.

This dame ain't
like Rosie.

Why I sent for you
so sudden is this, Smiley.

You've been negotiating to operate
in the east the same as St. Louis.

Which is ok with me and the boys, on certain
good and reasonable conditions, of course.

I got conditions, too.

Oh sure. We're not going to have
any argument about percentages.

There's only
one question.

- Shoot.

Eddie Kagle.

What about him?

Well, now
that he's out...

free again,

Ain't you heard?

Eddie ain't around
anymore.

He ain't?

Yeah, he was bumped off
the minute he graduated college.

Oh, what do you know?

That means you're
top dog now.

Nobody else.

And you're operating alone? You don't
have to ask nobody about nothin'?

You're learning fast.

You wouldn't be holding out any important
information on us, would you, Smiley?

Let's ask "for instance."

For instance,
like silent partners.

You know, someone way up in political circles
that's maybe getting a cut out of everything?

I told you I operate
strictly alone.

We heard different.

And we heard it straight,
Smiley.

You're hearing it
straight from me.

Yours truly,
Smiley Williams.

Alright, Smiley.
If you say so.

After all, if you ain't exactly
telling us the truth,

they'd be complications,
with somebody who'd get hurt.

It's always the other
guy who gets hurt.

Not me.

Send him to the judge's house.
That'll settle both of 'em.

- Just get them together.

Tell you what, Smiley.
I just had a thought.

Before you open up,
there's a guy you gotta see.

If he gives you the ok,
we'll do business.

Is he the juice?

Yeah, the juice.

I'll give you his
name and address.

You'd better call
on him right away.

If he's not
at home,

wait for him.

Judge?

A judge, huh?

Frederick Parker.

Better be getting
on over there.

Hah. Is he the juice?

Running for governor, too.

Surprised?

Yeah.

I thought
you would be.

Is he tough?

You tell us. We'll be waiting
to hear how you come out.

Bye, Smiley.

So long.

My children, my children.
You'd be lost without me.

The governor's mansion is alright,
but this is where we really live.

Should we go in?

In? Where?

In our house, silly.

Oh.

Sure.

Can't you
just see it?

Shining and beautiful.

Remember darling, all the fun
we had planning all this?

Location, and the rooms
and the garden?

Come on, let's go up
those cedar steps.

Careful now.

Now, we're on
our porch.

Oh, Darling. We'll spend
a lot of time out here.

After dinner, in the evenings,
when it's quiet and peaceful.

Let's go inside.

Hey, oh wait.

What's the matter?

You have to
open the door.

Oh.

Come in, dear.

Now then.

Hey.

You forgot to
close the door.

When we're married, I'm going to insist
that you carry me across the threshold.

When...

When we get
married, huh?

Well, don't say it
so gloomly, dear.

It won't be
that bad.

Now.

Over here
is your study.

Your private
sacred room.

And they'll be pictures of all the great men
of law, and literature, and politics.

And over here by the window,
will be your law library.

And a big lounging chair for you
to plop down and read.

Will I wanna do any reading
with you in the house?

Fred.

That's the nicest thing
you've ever said to me.

There's a lot of nice things
I wanna say to you.

Say them to me
in there.

That's the most important
room in the house.

What is it?
The kitchen?

No.

The nursery.

You mean...

you want to live here
with me and...

have kids?

Sit on a porch?

Of course, darling.

Look at me.

You mean with me?

The way I am?

With what you
see and...

how I talk?

I love you.

You don't see no
difference?

No difference
that matters.

Imagine that.

I could've
had all this.

Been all this.

People calling me 'Your Honor'
and smiling at me.

Kids making a fuss
over me and...

me not having to hide
from someone all the time.

And you.

I could've had you.

But you are all that.
You have me.

I ain't.

I got nothing.

I ain't got...
even got myself.

Don't say those things.
As least not out here.

You promised today would be our day. You promised to
forget all about the court and the election, and everything.

Please, darling.

Let's just
enjoy ourselves.

I beg pardon, sir, but perhaps
you'd prefer to come back tomorrow.

Evidently, His Honor
is unavoidably detained.

I'll wait.

Yes sir.

You happy, darling?

Yeah.

I'm scared, too.

Of what?

I don't know.

I've never been scared
of nothin' all my life.

Doctor Higgins said
you might—

Ah, it nothin' the
doctor knows about.

Something I can't
figure out myself.

Except maybe... it's because I found
something I never had before.

Something... I want
to hold on to.

Place like this.

Feeling of quiet
inside me.

A new slant
on things.

Ya, I'm talking
screwy.

No, you're not.

It makes me so happy
to hear you talk like that.

Happy?

Fred, I'm beginning
to find you again.

Honey, I'm...

I'm all mixed up.

You see, I...

I made a deal.

But how could I've known that
I'll meet up with a girl like you?

Rather cut my arm
off than hurt you.

I could puzzle
it out.

Just for a couple
of minutes.

Myself.

It's alright,
darling.

That was a very,
touching scene.

What are you gum-shoein'
around for?

I have some nice
news for you.

Remember I promised that if you help me
get Judge Parker, I'd help you get Smiley?

Uh-huh.

Well, I happen to keep my word,
even though some others don't.

I did everything
you asked me.

And bungled
everything, too.

Instead of ruining Judge Parker,
you made him more popular.

That fight
in the auditorium.

Refusing the bribe in the Bentley case.
And now this...

fantastic billing
and cooing.

A guy can change,
can't he?

Oh not you,
Eddie.

It's too late
for that.

Sorry, the 'halo' isn't
your particular dish.

However, what I came
to tell you is this.

Smiley is in town.

What's he doing here?

He's come to extend
his cafe business.

He's gonna open up
in this city.

With your money,
Eddie.

The money you went
to jail for.

The money
he killed you for.

I don't know.

Getting the rat don't seem
important no more.

Oh no really, Eddie.
You're going soft.

What's more,
you're getting yellow.

Don't you never
say that to me.

Then prove I'm wrong by carrying out
your end of the bargain.

Well I...

I...can't leave Rosie.

I mean...

Barbara.

Smiley in town is not only
a threat to you, but to...

Barbara, too.

You mean...

You mean the girl is in danger
with Smiley here?

Figure it out
yourself.

When he sees you, if you
don't get him, he'll get you.

Like he did
before.

With a smile
on his face.

- You know what that would
mean to Judge Parker.

- To his body.

- And where would
that leave Barbara?

So you see...

Either way...
for her sake...

for sake of any little
children she may have.

You got to kill him.

He got a way of putting things
which makes sense.

Although inside me
I know that...

I shouldn't follow your advice,
but it's like you're saying

it would only doin'
Barbara a favor.

Protecting...
her kids...

Our kids, maybe.

Uh-huh.

Now you're beginning
to see straight.

And think clearly.

Should we go?

I gotta
tell Barbara first.

Honey, I...

I gotta attend to something.
Something very important.

Gotta use your car.

My car?

Well, I guess it's alright, dear.
If you want to.

Thanks.

I won't be long.

Look, honey.

I want you to straighten
me out on something.

I'll try dear,
if I can.

If we was already married,

and living in this house, and

had kids...

and one day a big rat full of poison came
out of his hole, and showed his teeth,

and went for
the kids' throats,

what would you do?

They'd be nothing
to do but destroy it.

You mean kill it,
don't you?

Yes.

Thanks.

Thanks for
straightening me out.

But wait!

Kill...

Kill...

What a beautiful day.

I couldn't ask for a more
delightful weather.

Take that grin off
of your face.

Now please permit me the privilege of expressing
my happy frame of mind with a...

few facial wrinkles.

Relieves the tension.

Look out I don't put
some wrinkles on you.

It'll stay
for keeps.

(police siren)

What's the matter?

I wasn't speeding.

I didn't say
you was.

Let me see your
driver's license.

Hah, must've left it
in my other suit.

In this state,
that ain't good.

How about your
owner's licence?

Tell him it's your
fiance's car.

Tell me you borrowed it to go to a campaign
meeting where you're making a speech.

Can't you recognize me?

I'm Judge Parker. I'm running
for governor in the next state.

There's a political shindig
there tonight and...

I'm making
a speech.

This is my
fiance's car.

She just let me have
it for the emergency.

What's her name?

Barbara Foster.

That's an interesting
set of circumstances.

A girl by that name phoned the police
and reported her car stolen.

And the description of the car and the license
number was identical with the one you're driving.

I'm telling you you're
making a mistake.

That's what
they all say.

Any how you're going to be explaining it
down at the station-house? Follow me.

Follow me.

You know this should convince you,
conclusively, that I'm the only friend you have.

First your best pal Smiley
double-crosses you, and now this girl.

It ain't so. The cop pulled a boner.
The girlie had nothing to do with it.

Wishful thinking, Eddie.
She knew you were out to kill,

which meant you wouldn't be governor,
and she wanted to be the governor's wife.

You're a liar.

Mankind has been beset by women since Adam and
Barbara is true offshot of her grandmother Eve.

You're batty.

Will you at least come to see that
I'm the only person you can trust?

No further than I could
throw this building.

Stop talking to me,
will ya?

You're making a fire
burn in my head!

- Now listen–
- Stop, I tell you!

Hey, what's with you?

Who are you talking to?

Nobody, I...

just rehearsing
my speech.

Yeah, well, come in the other room.
That lady is here... the owner of the car.

Barbara!

Barbara, tell this copper
who I am.

I beg your
pardon?

What's this?

Do you know
this man?

I've never seen him
before in my life.

Barbara, please.

Don't do this to me.

You have to file
a complaint, lady.

- Alright.
-Barbara, wait.

Let me talk
to you.

Alone, just for
a few minutes.

This may mean
everything to you.

To... To your future.

Please.

Barbara.

There's certain things
I can't tell you.

Because I know
you won't believe it.

But you gotta
believe this.

For the first time I can remember,
I'm trying to do something for somebody else.

Without caring
what happens to me.

I was beginning to change,
you understand?

I done it.

Don't spoil it now.

Don't let me down.

For your own sake.

For sake
of them kids...

which is gonna sleep in that nursery
you were telling me about.

Fred, you said something
about making a deal.

Alright.

I want you to make
a deal with me.

I'll get you
out of here...

if you go with me
to a minister...

...and marry me.

Right now.

But I can't, I...

Take it up, Eddie.

And you can finish
what you started out to do.

Alright.

I'll marry you.

- Hey, Nick. You're going
the wrong direction.

I'm going in the
right direction.

Never mind, dear.

And He said
in another place,

"If anyone offend one of the weak
who believe in Me,"

"it better for him—"
(knock on door)

Where did I leave off,
my given?

"It were better."

For what were better?

"If anyone offends."

"If anyone offends"

"one of the weak
who believe in Me,"

"it were better—"

- Well...?

We want
to get married.

- Why?

Too many people are getting married,
these days, without asking themselves why.

Well, there's
an idea.

Make a note
of that for sermon.

Yes, dear.

My husband
is preparing his sermon.

He'll be right with you.

Won't you sit down?

"And one of the weak
who'll believe in Me..."

"What better for him,"

"let a millstone
hang about his neck,"

"and he will cast
into the sea."

And he said in another place,
"If thy hand offend thee, cut it off."

"It is better for thee to enter life maimed,
than to go into the cahaina..."

"of an extinguishable fire."

You said it,
brother.

His expressions of approval
become confine to Amen.

Please.

For it is written that everyone
shall be burned with fire

and every bit
of salt with salt.

And the Devil speaks to you,
my children, heed him not,

for his only desire to lead
you below, he's the evil one.

Watch for him.

No matter what name
he introduces himself with,

Lucifer, views of our
Mephistopheles.

Hey.

I know him.

- Where was I?

- Mephistopheles.
- Oh, yes.

Heed not Mephistopheles,
my children...

lest you suffer
eternal damnation.

When he whispers
in your ear,

you turn away your head, and hearken instead
to the angel on your shoulder.

What if he ain't got
no angel on his shoulder?

You have
if you live right, son.

Be good, do good.

- The devil wields no power
over a good man.

Sit tight, honey,
I'm coming right back.

Where you going?

I'm gonna tell off
the devil.

- Good for you, son.

The alter is to your left
as you enter the church.

Well, Eddie.

I just came out
to tell you something.

There's a smart operator,
in there.

what knows
all the answers.

- You don't say.
- Mm-hmm.

He even knows
who you are.

Do you know?

Yeah, Nick.

I know.

I'm afraid I'll have to take you
back, Eddie. You know too much.

The dope I got says you can't
get the drop on a good man.

That hardly
covers you.

My record's clean
in this trip.

I ain't done nothing wrong
since you brought me back.

Oh Eddie, I only have the
kindliest feelings towards you.

And to prove it, I want you to go
right back in there, and marry Barbara,

and my blessings
on both of you.

We don't want no
blessings from you.

I'm through
with you.

Beezlebub.

And therefore is not by any
to be entered to lightly.

but reverently.

Discreetly. Advisably.

Soberly.

And in the
fear of God.

Under this holy estate, these two
persons come now to be joined.

If any man can
show just cause,

why they may not
lawfully be joined together,

let him
now speak,

or else hereafter,
forever hold his peace.

I require and
charge you both—

Wait a minute.

Please, dear.

He brought up
something important.

Honey, I gotta speak now,
like he says.

I can't marry you.

I'd be doing wrong.

And that's just what
the devil is waiting for.

Oh dear, Lord.

Fred, you don't know how hard
I've been trying to help you in every way.

But I'm afraid I can't
go much further.

You're not only destroying
yourself, you're destroying me.

And I just can't
stand it any longer.

Please, let's go on
with the ceremony.

But honey, I can't.

My eyes have
been opened.

Marrying you now would
be the worst thing I could do.

Which don't mean that you lost Fred Parker, but like
you said this afternoon, you'd be finding him again.

And you'll be
proud of it.

Like you
always was.

Honey, if I can only
make you understand.

I think I do
understand, darling.

Come,
I'll drive you home.

Please forgive us.

Eddie.

You have
a visitor.

You might like to know
that in his breast pocket,

he's carrying the very gun
with which he snuffed you out.

He's been carrying it
around, ever since.

Brings him luck,
he says.

You can now repay that long
overdue debt with your own gun.

That's what's known
as poetic justice.

"Heed not Mephistopheles,
my children..."

"lest you suffer
eternal damnation."

"When he whispers
in your ear,"

"turn away
your head."

"and hearken instead,

to the angel
on your shoulder.

You're right,
Mephistopheles...

or Nick,
for short.

But I ain't never plugged
no guy what's asleep.

I'll wake him first.

It's so much simpler
this way.

I made him drowsy
to make it easier for you.

You make everything
easy, don't you?

Alright.

Have it your way.
Wake him up.

It might be
more amusing.

I'll go fix him
a drink.

Make it feel
like old times.

Smiley.

Smiley!

Oh, who called me?

- I did.

Oh.

Judge Parker.

I'm fixing
a couple of drinks.

What's on your mind?

Well, I'm operating in
St. Louis and other spots.

Uh huh.

And I'm interested in a couple
of joints here, in the East.

Bellamy steered me to you
about getting a passport.

Sure, sure.

I understand.

So, as is my nature to
come to the point pronto,

what's your cut?

A hundred grand
and 25% of the take.

Hold on, Judge.

I may be from St. Louis,
but I ain't no hick.

You operating alone?

No partner?

All alone.

I heard there was a Eddie Kagle
heading in your outfit.

Ya, but he's dead.

Are you sure?

Well, I ought to know,
'cause I, uh...

- 'Cause you what?

I got the flash as soon as
the cops found his body.

I heard he was
your pal.

Yeah, we grew up
together.

I used to do his thinking,
and he do my fight.

So you paid him off by puttin' four
slugs in him from his own rod.

What kind of talk is that?

You have
to blackmail?

This is Smiley Williams
you're talking to.

Who should know...

better than me?

You.

You—

Why are you
so nervous?

You look like you've
seen a ghost.

Stop it Eddie,
get on with it.

Shut up,
Mephistopheles.

My name is
Smiley Williams.

Pleased to meet you.

They call me
Judge Parker.

- But maybe I ain't
Judge Parker.

Maybe I'm somebody else.

Somebody you know.

No.

- No! You can't
be him.

Him?

Who's him?

Eddie! Eddie Kagle!

Oh, you can't be. This whole
thing, it-it's screwy.

Maybe it ain't screwy.

Why don't you start
figuring it out?

If I ain't Judge Parker,
I must be somebody else.

Maybe I'm that pal of yours, Eddie. Eddie Kagle,
the one you chopped down with his own rod.

Figure it when you're afraid of every
shadow, every footstep, every sound,

every dark alley
you pass,

every car that
whizzes by.

Hole up in your hideout
and go slowly nuts.

And trying to figure,
is Eddie Kagle dead...

or is he alive?

And then when you
can't take it no more,

go blow your
brains out.

There it is...
your own gun.

Return the compliment,
Eddie.

Stop whispering
in my ear, devil.

Lay off of me,
will you, Judge?

I'll do anything
you say.

Eddie!

Eddie!

Give me
a chance!

- Ahhhh...

You didn't
shoot him.

We had
a bargain.

He was took care of
a better way.

And I never even
touched him.

Now you go back to your
hole in the ground.

You're in my way.

I cannot go back
without you.

Well, now, ain't
that too bad.

Listen, Eddie.

No soul has ever escaped my domain before.

I've got to get you back or
I'll be jeered at and derided.

Why the upheaval would be
cataclysmic in its proportions.

What a laugh.

Looks like you got yourself
behind the eight ball.

Come on, Eddie.
Please.

Have a heart.

You'll have to take
it up with the Boss.

I'm getting my orders
from Him...

from now on.

Must I run afoul
of you again?

Am I doomed forever
to be vanquished?

What has this sub-human creature,
incubated in the recesses of foulness,

done to become
your favorite?

It was with evil intent
that he ventured forth.

He volunteered
to do my bidding.

Must I be humiliated
by this maggot?

I demand my rights.

You're missing
the point, chum.

There's an hombre
called Judge Parker.

And a sweet girl named Barbara what's
been playing good ball with a lot of kids,

which might otherwise
join up with your team.

And me, Eddie Kagle, is staying around
to see that you don't mess things up.

So long as you remain in the judge's body,
neither you nor he can do anything.

What's more, you're making
Barbara very unhappy.

The longer you
remain on earth,

the longer she cannot be joined
with her rightful mate.

It was you
who got me in.

You were evil, then.
I had power over you.

I get it.

If I don't myself help you
take me out of Parker's body...

Barbara and the Judge don't
get together like they should.

Alright I'll make
you a deal.

If you lay off the Judge
and Barbara for life,

I'll go back
with you.

I accept.
I have to.

You ready?

Wait, I...

I want to say goodbye
to Barbara first.

I cannot wait.

You'll wait
and like it.

Hello?

Barbara?

I gotta see you
right away.

Hop in your car
and come right over.

Yeah.

Thanks, honey.

You sure are somethin' for
the eyes in that outfit, honey.

Thank you, darling.

I want to look my best.

You said we'd go to
dinner and a show.

Um...

I'm afraid,
that's off.

'Cause...

'Cause I—
I'm going away.

I ain't never
coming back.

Dearest, what
do you mean?

Why would you
be going away?

Well, I can't
tell ya 'cause...

I'm afraid you won't
understand, baby.

I only understand that wherever
you go, I wanna go with you.

Nix.

You don't belong
where I'm going.

Oh no, Darling.

Eddie?

I got everything set for you, honey.
So you won't have no more trouble.

When I'm gone,

the Judge can straighten
everything out and...

you and him
get married.

And go live in
that swell house.

And have kids.

- Eddie.

I have to be going
now, honey.

Please, please don't.
Please don't.

Darling,

I feel kinda funny.

Kinda dizzy.

Darling, go and lie down
for a minute.

Yeah, yeah.
I'll lie down.

I just want
to tell you—

- Eddie.

Bye, honey.

Doctor Higgins, please.

Do you know
where he is?

Please try to reach him and tell him to come
to Judge Parker's apartment immediately.

It's very urgent.

Thank you.

- Barbara.

- Barbara!

[Judge] There's
tears in your eyes.

[Judge]
What's the matter?

[Barbara]
It's nothing.

[Barbara] It's nothing.
Everything's fine now.

Well...

So long.

Funny.

I never thought people's
faces looked so good.

There's lots of other things
I never noticed before.

If I'd only known the first trip
around what I know now.

When I get you down below,
I'm going to take special pains with you.

I'm going to introduce you
to agonies undreamed of.

I don't think
you'll be so tough.

- No?
-Nah.

'Cause you
know why?

'Cause you made
a sap of yourself.

You don't want your
boys to know that.

No big shot wants to look like
a sucker before his own mob.

Now if I was
made a trustee—

This is sheer,
unblushing blackmail.

You oughta know,
brother.

You oughta know.