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1
00:00:04,834 --> 00:00:07,000
Then a female party guest
comes in
2
00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:08,701
to get her coat
off the pile,
3
00:00:08,701 --> 00:00:11,868
not knowing that
I'm underneath the pile,
4
00:00:11,868 --> 00:00:13,767
having me own party
5
00:00:13,767 --> 00:00:14,767
with Vanessa.
6
00:00:16,334 --> 00:00:17,767
And then the guest reaches
7
00:00:17,767 --> 00:00:20,634
for, mm, what she thinks
is her umbrella.
8
00:00:20,634 --> 00:00:22,701
But it wasn't.
9
00:00:24,133 --> 00:00:26,067
Yeah, you already told me
that one.
10
00:00:26,067 --> 00:00:27,901
Did I do this part?
11
00:00:27,901 --> 00:00:29,934
Yeah, you need
some new moves.
12
00:00:32,868 --> 00:00:36,501
Anyway,
you should leave.
13
00:00:38,567 --> 00:00:40,067
Audrey's gonna be here
any second,
14
00:00:40,067 --> 00:00:41,567
and I'm surprising her
15
00:00:41,567 --> 00:00:44,634
with a luxurious getaway
weekend.
16
00:00:44,634 --> 00:00:46,534
Wow, this place
looks pretty expensive.
17
00:00:46,534 --> 00:00:47,934
What are you gonna do,
drive by it
18
00:00:47,934 --> 00:00:50,234
on the way to Motel 6?
19
00:00:50,234 --> 00:00:52,634
Check out the last page.
20
00:00:52,634 --> 00:00:54,234
Okay. Here we go.
21
00:00:54,234 --> 00:00:55,868
"All for $199,
22
00:00:55,868 --> 00:00:59,667
once you've enjoyed our
time-share sales presentation."
23
00:00:59,667 --> 00:01:03,367
Otherwise known as
the Jeff Bingham Special.
24
00:01:03,367 --> 00:01:07,167
Yeah, yeah. That's right.
Jeff 1, System nothing.
25
00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:08,400
Dude,
26
00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,100
those salespeople are, like,
crazy aggressive.
27
00:01:11,100 --> 00:01:12,267
At least the guy that sold me
28
00:01:12,267 --> 00:01:15,067
my timeshare
in Gary, Indiana was.
29
00:01:15,067 --> 00:01:16,601
So you gonna tell Audrey?
30
00:01:16,601 --> 00:01:18,000
Yeah.
31
00:01:21,334 --> 00:01:22,334
Eventually.
32
00:01:23,434 --> 00:01:25,868
How are you not
on wife number two by now?
33
00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:30,300
A-ha-ha.
34
00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:31,300
Mrs. Bingham.
35
00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:33,801
Oh, Jeff. How nice.
36
00:01:33,801 --> 00:01:36,100
You bought me
a garden gnome.
37
00:01:38,334 --> 00:01:39,734
I cherish
our moments together.
38
00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:43,901
Hey, baby, you've
been working hard lately...
39
00:01:43,901 --> 00:01:46,767
and...don't think
I haven't noticed.
40
00:01:46,767 --> 00:01:50,467
God, ever since Trish left,
you know, I've had such a full--
41
00:01:50,467 --> 00:01:53,734
Hang on. I'm doing
something here.
42
00:01:53,734 --> 00:01:54,734
Check this out.
43
00:01:54,734 --> 00:01:55,968
You, me,
44
00:01:55,968 --> 00:01:57,300
this weekend.
45
00:01:57,300 --> 00:01:58,667
Booya!
46
00:01:58,667 --> 00:02:00,634
Jeff with the total
power move.
47
00:02:00,634 --> 00:02:02,868
Wow, this place looks nice.
48
00:02:02,868 --> 00:02:04,000
Fine dining.
49
00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,000
You're welcome.
50
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:06,000
Full spa.
51
00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,334
My way of thanking you.
52
00:02:07,334 --> 00:02:08,734
Pillowtop beds.
53
00:02:08,734 --> 00:02:10,033
For your way of
thanking me.
54
00:02:11,234 --> 00:02:13,300
Why is the last page
ripped out?
55
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:14,400
I must've drooled
on it
56
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,167
when I saw the picture
of the jazz brunch.
57
00:02:16,167 --> 00:02:18,501
All right...just tell me.
58
00:02:18,501 --> 00:02:19,634
Tell you what?
59
00:02:19,634 --> 00:02:21,834
I don't want another
vacation surprise.
60
00:02:21,834 --> 00:02:23,400
Like when
that bed-and-breakfast
61
00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,167
turned out to be your buddy's
grandmother's house.
62
00:02:26,167 --> 00:02:28,334
He said she wasn't
gonna be there.
63
00:02:28,334 --> 00:02:30,334
Well, she was, Jeff.
64
00:02:30,334 --> 00:02:33,200
She was, and she died.
65
00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,767
Sunday night.
66
00:02:35,767 --> 00:02:37,934
We still had
two good days.
67
00:02:40,868 --> 00:02:42,801
So, what's the deal
this time, huh?
68
00:02:44,100 --> 00:02:45,801
All right, look,
all you gotta do
69
00:02:45,801 --> 00:02:48,868
is sit through a little
time-share sales presentation.
70
00:02:48,868 --> 00:02:51,000
Oh. Okay.
71
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,801
Really?
Yeah, sure.
72
00:02:52,801 --> 00:02:55,467
I mean...we're young,
we're just starting out,
73
00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:56,868
we don't have
any money.
74
00:02:56,868 --> 00:02:59,167
Oh, wait. That was
15 years ago.
75
00:02:59,167 --> 00:03:01,534
Why do you always have to--?
76
00:03:01,534 --> 00:03:05,467
All right, let's not get into
why I always do what I do.
77
00:03:05,467 --> 00:03:07,267
It's never productive.
78
00:03:08,467 --> 00:03:10,234
All right, look.
How abthis?
79
00:03:10,234 --> 00:03:13,033
All the money that we save
goes to spa treatments for you.
80
00:03:13,033 --> 00:03:14,434
Oh, that's a given.
81
00:03:14,434 --> 00:03:16,701
But I still don't wanna deal
with those sales creeps.
82
00:03:16,701 --> 00:03:18,801
You won't have to. You know
how I love doing battle
83
00:03:18,801 --> 00:03:20,701
with those guys.
I'll just stare 'em down.
84
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:23,133
Hm. Like you do when
Girl Scouts come to our door?
85
00:03:23,133 --> 00:03:25,801
They got a lot of nerve
charging those prices.
86
00:03:25,801 --> 00:03:28,200
Those mints get thinner
every year.
87
00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:29,868
Come on.
88
00:03:29,868 --> 00:03:32,634
It'll be a very...
special weekend.
89
00:03:32,634 --> 00:03:35,534
Okay. I'm in.
90
00:03:35,534 --> 00:03:36,834
Beats staying here all weekend
91
00:03:36,834 --> 00:03:39,367
watching you dig things out
of your belly button.
92
00:03:40,868 --> 00:03:43,067
Well, it's not like
that's not coming with me.
93
00:03:50,501 --> 00:03:51,868
Yeah, hi, this is
Jeff Bingham.
94
00:03:51,868 --> 00:03:53,934
I'm calling to confirm
the time-share weekend.
95
00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:55,701
Excellent, Mr. Bingham.
96
00:03:55,701 --> 00:03:58,000
And you should know we're having
a special promotion.
97
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,801
If you bring another couple,
your weekend is free.
98
00:04:02,767 --> 00:04:05,200
Free, you say?
99
00:04:32,567 --> 00:04:35,234
And it would mean so much
to us if you guys came along.
100
00:04:35,234 --> 00:04:36,601
Really?
That would be awesome.
101
00:04:36,601 --> 00:04:37,601
What a great idea.
102
00:04:37,601 --> 00:04:38,767
Isn't that sweet?
103
00:04:38,767 --> 00:04:40,300
Jeff came up with it
all on his own.
104
00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:42,367
Hey. Sharing good times
with friends.
105
00:04:42,367 --> 00:04:43,567
That's what it's
all about.
106
00:04:43,567 --> 00:04:44,667
Making memories.
107
00:04:46,067 --> 00:04:48,634
Memories,
the building blocks of life.
108
00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:53,767
Well, thank you.
Thanks, man.
109
00:04:53,767 --> 00:04:55,133
This place
looks great.
110
00:04:55,133 --> 00:04:57,601
I mean, it's got a pool.
It's got a tennis court.
111
00:04:57,601 --> 00:05:00,467
Ah. Warm cookies
at turndown.
112
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:02,968
Hmm.
113
00:05:02,968 --> 00:05:04,067
So we do the presentation,
114
00:05:04,067 --> 00:05:05,968
and the whole weekend's
only 199 bucks?
115
00:05:05,968 --> 00:05:08,100
Yes, that's how much it is
for each couple, so...
116
00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:09,434
we both have to pay that.
117
00:05:11,467 --> 00:05:12,901
Well, it sounds like
a lot of fun,
118
00:05:12,901 --> 00:05:15,067
but, unfortunately,
I already have plans.
119
00:05:15,067 --> 00:05:16,234
Oh, you're not going.
120
00:05:16,234 --> 00:05:20,200
I know, because I have plans.
121
00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:22,467
No, 'cause you're
not invited.
122
00:05:22,467 --> 00:05:26,067
Uh, don't beg. I can't go.
123
00:05:27,834 --> 00:05:31,334
What are your plans, she asked,
regretting it immediately.
124
00:05:31,334 --> 00:05:33,734
Well, it's
sort of exciting.
125
00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:35,534
I, uh-- I'm being
interviewed
126
00:05:35,534 --> 00:05:37,300
for New York Style
magazine.
127
00:05:37,300 --> 00:05:38,701
They're doing a special feature
128
00:05:38,701 --> 00:05:41,701
on "The 40 Hottest Bachelors
Under 40."
129
00:05:46,968 --> 00:05:49,767
Ha-ha. I'm laughing
at both parts of that.
130
00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:51,834
I'm 38.
131
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,000
At one time, yes.
132
00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:56,434
All right, couples win.
I'm tapping out.
133
00:05:56,434 --> 00:05:58,334
I mean, I could see
"The 40 Hottest Bachelors
134
00:05:58,334 --> 00:05:59,334
Under 40 Inches."
135
00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:04,234
I just said I'm out.
Late hit.
136
00:06:09,467 --> 00:06:12,067
I don't get to
play golf enough.
137
00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:14,767
They should put a course
in Central Park.
138
00:06:14,767 --> 00:06:18,701
Did I tell you the other day
in the park I saw a chicken?
139
00:06:18,701 --> 00:06:21,467
Where do you figure
that came from?
140
00:06:21,467 --> 00:06:24,501
Audrey, are you listening
to anything I'm saying?
141
00:06:24,501 --> 00:06:26,634
Well now, what's with
all the personal grooming?
142
00:06:26,634 --> 00:06:27,667
Should I, uh...
143
00:06:27,667 --> 00:06:30,067
push my tee time
back nine minutes?
144
00:06:30,067 --> 00:06:32,734
Calm down, it's not
for you.
145
00:06:32,734 --> 00:06:35,067
Maybe I'll wait to calm down
till you tell me who it's for.
146
00:06:36,534 --> 00:06:37,534
It--
147
00:06:37,534 --> 00:06:39,267
It's for Jennifer.
148
00:06:39,267 --> 00:06:42,934
Well, this weekend just took
a very interesting turn.
149
00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,501
Don't be a pervert.
150
00:06:46,501 --> 00:06:49,901
Sorry. So, what's
the unhot explanation?
151
00:06:49,901 --> 00:06:51,868
Okay, I know you're
gonna think this is silly,
152
00:06:51,868 --> 00:06:53,667
but Jen and I are
going to the spa together,
153
00:06:53,667 --> 00:06:55,234
and I wanna put
my best foot forward.
154
00:06:55,234 --> 00:06:56,701
Well, the part
you were working on
155
00:06:56,701 --> 00:06:58,767
was pretty far north
of your foot.
156
00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:02,667
Jen and I have never been naked
in front of each other,
157
00:07:02,667 --> 00:07:04,200
and I just wanna
look good.
158
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,067
You know.
First impressions.
159
00:07:06,067 --> 00:07:07,100
All right.
160
00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:08,868
Trust me. You got
nothing to worry about.
161
00:07:08,868 --> 00:07:11,701
You got Jen beat
in the boob department, easy.
162
00:07:11,701 --> 00:07:14,400
Honey, I know
you're trying--
163
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:16,033
Just say, "Thank you."
164
00:07:16,033 --> 00:07:17,601
Thank you.
165
00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:21,300
Oh, come on.
166
00:07:21,300 --> 00:07:22,968
Probably a message
167
00:07:22,968 --> 00:07:23,968
from some dumb client
168
00:07:23,968 --> 00:07:25,701
worried about his stupid money.
169
00:07:26,767 --> 00:07:28,767
Oh, crap, our steaks
are coming.
170
00:07:28,767 --> 00:07:30,367
What?
Yeah.
171
00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,300
Our Steak of the Month
gets delivered today.
172
00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:34,267
I set a reminder.
And yet, you forgot
173
00:07:34,267 --> 00:07:35,734
my birthday
this year.
174
00:07:35,734 --> 00:07:39,434
Your birthday isn't
perishable.
175
00:07:39,434 --> 00:07:41,367
Why do we have to have
steaks shipped to us?
176
00:07:41,367 --> 00:07:43,567
They have perfectly good ones
at the supermarket.
177
00:07:43,567 --> 00:07:46,300
That's why you're
in charge of salad.
178
00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:49,067
You know, I'm
gonna call Russell
179
00:07:49,067 --> 00:07:51,400
have him drop by,
put the package in the fridge.
180
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,100
No. No, just--
181
00:07:53,100 --> 00:07:54,334
Just have
the doorman do it.
182
00:07:54,334 --> 00:07:55,501
I don't trust him.
183
00:07:55,501 --> 00:07:58,033
I had a shipment of bacon
go missing recently.
184
00:07:58,033 --> 00:08:00,501
He's my prime suspect.
185
00:08:00,501 --> 00:08:03,534
I don't want Russell
sniffing around our apartment.
186
00:08:03,534 --> 00:08:05,267
Come on, there's gotta be
someone else.
187
00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:06,968
Like who?
I don't know.
188
00:08:06,968 --> 00:08:09,133
Dial 212 and
seven random digits.
189
00:08:09,133 --> 00:08:10,167
You will find someone.
190
00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:11,200
All right.
191
00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:16,601
What do you know?
I dialed Russell.
192
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,033
Russell Dunbar,
38 and loving it.
193
00:08:31,033 --> 00:08:32,300
Can I help you?
194
00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,901
Oh, hey, man,
what's up?
195
00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:39,801
You have meat
delivered?
196
00:08:39,801 --> 00:08:42,634
Yes. Both fresh and jerkied.
197
00:08:42,634 --> 00:08:45,133
Dude, come on, I gotta go meet
this magazine reporter.
198
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:47,400
Uh, get the key from the super.
It'll take one minute.
199
00:08:48,634 --> 00:08:50,234
All right. Uh,
I'm meeting her
200
00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:51,701
at a restaurant
kind of by you,
201
00:08:51,701 --> 00:08:53,801
so I guess I could trudge up
and deal with it.
202
00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:55,334
Uh, but just so you know,
203
00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:57,601
I don't want to,
and it's a total hassle.
204
00:08:57,601 --> 00:08:58,534
Okay.
205
00:09:01,968 --> 00:09:04,434
I'd do me.
206
00:09:07,267 --> 00:09:10,100
Oh. Wow. This is
such a nice place.
207
00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:12,501
Yeah, I-- I wish
they didn't allow kids.
208
00:09:12,501 --> 00:09:15,567
I mean, that line at
the water slide was crazy long.
209
00:09:16,901 --> 00:09:19,000
You know what I just realized?
Huh.
210
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,634
This is our first
couples vacation
211
00:09:20,634 --> 00:09:22,100
since we got engaged.
212
00:09:22,100 --> 00:09:23,400
Oh, yeah,
you're right.
213
00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:25,734
It's gonna be
so great. Oh, God.
214
00:09:25,734 --> 00:09:27,434
Drinking beers
with Jeff...
215
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,033
hitting the pool
with Jeff.
216
00:09:29,033 --> 00:09:31,067
Hey, maybe we'll play
some Skee-Ball.
217
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,400
You do know that you and Jeff
aren't a couple, right?
218
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:37,868
Yeah, yeah, I know.
I know, honey.
219
00:09:37,868 --> 00:09:40,100
But we barely get to
hang out like this, so...
220
00:09:40,100 --> 00:09:42,100
I understand.
You know, I think
221
00:09:42,100 --> 00:09:43,400
'cause you were
an only child,
222
00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:45,367
you look at Jeff
like a big brother.
223
00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,534
Oh, d-- Don't
make it gay.
224
00:09:48,734 --> 00:09:51,834
All right. You have
your guy fun,
225
00:09:51,834 --> 00:09:53,367
but save some time
for me.
226
00:09:53,367 --> 00:09:55,701
Because there are
some things
227
00:09:55,701 --> 00:09:56,767
I want us
to do together.
228
00:09:56,767 --> 00:09:58,467
Oh, I can't wait.
229
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,033
What is it? Sex?
230
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:01,501
It's sex, isn't it?
231
00:10:03,801 --> 00:10:05,467
Yeah. It's sex.
232
00:10:11,901 --> 00:10:12,934
Hi.
Hey.
233
00:10:12,934 --> 00:10:13,934
Hey, guys.
234
00:10:13,934 --> 00:10:15,367
Ready for
the spa?
235
00:10:15,367 --> 00:10:17,267
Oh, she's ready
all right.
236
00:10:19,901 --> 00:10:22,133
I don't know
what that meant.
237
00:10:23,901 --> 00:10:24,901
Have fun, ladies.
238
00:10:24,901 --> 00:10:26,834
Enjoy the relaxation.
239
00:10:28,501 --> 00:10:30,234
All right.
Now the broads are gone,
240
00:10:30,234 --> 00:10:31,300
what should
we do, huh?
241
00:10:32,567 --> 00:10:33,634
Huh? Drinks in the bar?
242
00:10:33,634 --> 00:10:34,667
Cigars in the lounge?
243
00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:36,667
Marco Polo in the pool?
244
00:10:37,667 --> 00:10:39,000
I'm playing golf.
245
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,968
Oh, I-- I don't
really like golf.
246
00:10:40,968 --> 00:10:42,234
Then you shouldn't play.
247
00:10:43,667 --> 00:10:46,067
Well, what happened to sharing
good times with friends?
248
00:10:46,067 --> 00:10:48,067
Well, you can play
golf with me.
249
00:10:48,067 --> 00:10:49,100
How about tennis?
250
00:10:49,100 --> 00:10:51,067
What are we, 17-year-old
Russian girls?
251
00:10:52,601 --> 00:10:54,968
You know, tennis is
manlier than golf.
252
00:10:54,968 --> 00:10:57,200
Oh, please. A golf ball
could kill you.
253
00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:58,534
A tennis ball couldn't.
254
00:10:58,534 --> 00:11:00,567
It could if you
choked on it.
255
00:11:02,534 --> 00:11:05,367
What are you doing with
a tennis ball in your mouth?
256
00:11:05,367 --> 00:11:06,701
Touch๏ฟฝ.
257
00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:10,033
Uh, here. I got
a putter for you.
258
00:11:11,601 --> 00:11:13,801
Try not to choke on it.
259
00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,267
Hey.
Oh, hey.
260
00:11:31,267 --> 00:11:32,434
How was your massage?
261
00:11:32,434 --> 00:11:35,434
Oh, it was nice. Except
the guy played a weird CD.
262
00:11:35,434 --> 00:11:38,267
It sounded like a whale
mating with Yanni.
263
00:11:38,267 --> 00:11:40,200
Oh, yeah. I've
heard that CD.
264
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,367
It's just Yanni.
265
00:11:42,367 --> 00:11:45,067
The water is perfect.
Come on in.
Uh.
266
00:11:53,534 --> 00:11:55,634
Oh, this is nice.
Yeah.
267
00:12:01,467 --> 00:12:03,167
Oh, you wanna get out
and hit the button?
268
00:12:03,167 --> 00:12:04,300
It's right there behind you.
269
00:12:13,067 --> 00:12:14,934
So then the guest grabs
270
00:12:14,934 --> 00:12:16,734
what she thought
was an umbrella.
271
00:12:16,734 --> 00:12:18,634
But it wasn't.
272
00:12:19,834 --> 00:12:21,067
Or...
273
00:12:21,067 --> 00:12:22,834
but it wasn't.
274
00:12:22,834 --> 00:12:24,834
Which one do you
like better?
275
00:12:24,834 --> 00:12:26,534
The second one.
Second one? Like this?
276
00:12:26,534 --> 00:12:27,734
Yeah.
Yeah, me too. Me too.
277
00:12:27,734 --> 00:12:29,133
Yeah.
Yeah, thanks. All right.
278
00:12:29,133 --> 00:12:31,100
See you later, brother.
All right, you too.
279
00:12:37,968 --> 00:12:39,067
Stupid.
280
00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:44,400
Ah.
281
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,467
Me Jeff. Me eat
big steaks.
282
00:12:50,467 --> 00:12:51,801
Me die young.
283
00:12:54,167 --> 00:12:56,334
Ah! God.
284
00:12:56,334 --> 00:12:58,167
Oh, come on.
285
00:12:59,567 --> 00:13:01,267
Oh, now I'm gonna
be late.
286
00:13:02,467 --> 00:13:04,167
It serves me right
for breaking my rule:
287
00:13:04,167 --> 00:13:06,334
Never help anybody ever.
288
00:13:09,801 --> 00:13:11,467
Ah.
289
00:13:13,834 --> 00:13:14,968
Eh.
290
00:13:23,734 --> 00:13:26,767
So you were naked,
but she wasn't?
291
00:13:26,767 --> 00:13:28,467
She looked like
she was dressed
292
00:13:28,467 --> 00:13:30,000
to swim
the English Channel.
293
00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:33,267
Unbelievable. And after
you went through
294
00:13:33,267 --> 00:13:35,067
all that cleanup
and maintenance.
295
00:13:35,067 --> 00:13:36,501
I know.
296
00:13:36,501 --> 00:13:40,133
Oh, look. Just so that
won't be a total waste...
297
00:13:40,133 --> 00:13:41,501
I could enjoy that later.
298
00:13:42,901 --> 00:13:45,100
I mean, what? Does she not
feel comfortable with me?
299
00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:46,968
I thought we were
better friends than that.
300
00:13:46,968 --> 00:13:49,267
Seriously, could I
enjoy that later?
301
00:13:55,367 --> 00:13:56,667
Russell?
302
00:13:58,033 --> 00:14:00,000
There isn't a problem
with the meat, is there?
303
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,133
No, the steaks are fine.
304
00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:03,801
I've got
a different problem.
305
00:14:06,934 --> 00:14:09,033
Do you have any clothes
from when you were like...
306
00:14:09,033 --> 00:14:10,367
7?
307
00:14:11,467 --> 00:14:12,634
No, why?
308
00:14:12,634 --> 00:14:14,634
Well, I gotta meet
this reporter in 10 minutes.
309
00:14:14,634 --> 00:14:16,934
Never mind,
you useless idiot.
310
00:14:16,934 --> 00:14:18,167
I'll deal with it.
311
00:14:33,033 --> 00:14:34,434
Yeah, so by
the fifth hole, I lost
312
00:14:34,434 --> 00:14:36,033
all my balls
in the bushes.
313
00:14:36,033 --> 00:14:38,200
Right? So I asked Jeff if
he could give me some more.
314
00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:39,634
He says, "Wouldn't
it be quicker
315
00:14:39,634 --> 00:14:41,834
if I tossed a couple
of twenties in the garbage?"
316
00:14:41,834 --> 00:14:44,234
I'm sorry.
317
00:14:44,234 --> 00:14:46,834
I-- I don't understand why
you guys didn't play tennis.
318
00:14:46,834 --> 00:14:48,567
A tennis ball
can't kill you.
319
00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:53,868
Hey, there he is:
Tiger Always-In-The-Woods.
320
00:14:53,868 --> 00:14:55,667
Hey. Hey,
at least I got to see
321
00:14:55,667 --> 00:14:58,100
two squirrels doing it,
squirrel-style.
322
00:14:59,934 --> 00:15:01,834
Maybe tomorrow you should
just go to the spa.
323
00:15:01,834 --> 00:15:03,300
It's so relaxing.
Right, Audrey?
324
00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:05,601
Oh, yeah. Yeah,
I did not wanna
325
00:15:05,601 --> 00:15:07,701
get out of that
hot tub.
326
00:15:07,701 --> 00:15:10,100
All right, now, remember,
you don't respond to anything
327
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:11,234
that the sales
guy says.
328
00:15:11,234 --> 00:15:13,300
You just let my stare
do the talking.
329
00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:14,434
Oh, Mr. Bingham.
330
00:15:14,434 --> 00:15:16,167
We spoke
on the phone.
331
00:15:16,167 --> 00:15:19,033
I'm so glad to see you took
advantage of our special offer.
332
00:15:19,033 --> 00:15:20,033
What offer?
333
00:15:20,033 --> 00:15:21,267
It's nothing.
334
00:15:21,267 --> 00:15:22,734
Since he brought
another couple,
335
00:15:22,734 --> 00:15:25,200
Mr. Bingham's weekend
is completely free.
336
00:15:27,033 --> 00:15:29,367
What?
Oh, Jeff.
337
00:15:29,367 --> 00:15:30,901
You didn't.
338
00:15:30,901 --> 00:15:31,901
Guy is confused.
339
00:15:31,901 --> 00:15:33,100
He's wearing
a nametag,
340
00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:34,634
for God's sakes.
341
00:15:35,934 --> 00:15:37,834
Wait, is that the only reason
you invited us?
342
00:15:37,834 --> 00:15:39,133
To get a free weekend?
343
00:15:39,133 --> 00:15:41,100
And you made us
pay for gas?
344
00:15:43,167 --> 00:15:45,567
All right, look. You know
what might calm everyone down?
345
00:15:45,567 --> 00:15:48,400
A nice, aggressive
sales presentation.
346
00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,534
I don't think so.
Come on, Jen.
347
00:15:52,767 --> 00:15:54,734
What's up with them?
348
00:15:54,734 --> 00:15:57,300
They thought we invited them
as friends, Jeff.
349
00:15:57,300 --> 00:15:59,567
They didn't realize
they were human coupons.
350
00:16:01,033 --> 00:16:04,067
Oh, by the way, thank you
for my "very special" weekend.
351
00:16:04,067 --> 00:16:06,400
Audrey.
- Oh, Mr. Bingham.
352
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,701
If none of you attend
the sales presentation,
353
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:11,767
you'll be charged
the full price of both rooms.
354
00:16:11,767 --> 00:16:15,567
Great. And how much
is that...
355
00:16:15,567 --> 00:16:16,667
Eric?
356
00:16:18,267 --> 00:16:21,501
I'm afraid it'll
cost you $1200.
357
00:16:22,901 --> 00:16:24,501
I'm afraid of that too.
358
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,200
Debra.
359
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,300
Hey. Russell.
360
00:16:34,300 --> 00:16:36,000
Your number one bachelor
under 40.
361
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,367
It's nice to
meet you, Russell.
362
00:16:37,367 --> 00:16:39,767
That's an...in--
Interesting outfit.
363
00:16:39,767 --> 00:16:42,868
Oh, thank you. Yeah, yeah,
it's very cutting edge.
364
00:16:42,868 --> 00:16:45,000
In the next few months,
I think you'll see
365
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,467
a lot of dudes
rocking this look.
Oh.
366
00:16:47,467 --> 00:16:49,801
Uh, I-- I don't think
that's a man's suit.
367
00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:51,834
Oh, yes, it is.
368
00:16:51,834 --> 00:16:54,667
Problem is you just haven't
seen it on these shores.
369
00:16:54,667 --> 00:16:57,667
It's all the rage in,
like, Milan, Tokyo...
370
00:16:58,701 --> 00:17:00,033
...Par--
371
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,567
Ah. I'm 42 anyway.
372
00:17:13,801 --> 00:17:15,801
Hey.
Hey.
373
00:17:15,801 --> 00:17:17,701
Tennis anyone?
374
00:17:18,868 --> 00:17:20,534
Thought you were
at the presentation.
375
00:17:20,534 --> 00:17:21,868
I'm skipping it.
Wait,
376
00:17:21,868 --> 00:17:23,634
isn't that gonna cost you
a pile of money?
377
00:17:23,634 --> 00:17:25,801
This isn't about money.
It's about friendship.
378
00:17:25,801 --> 00:17:26,934
Twelve-hundred bucks.
379
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,801
Well, thanks, man.
Forget it.
380
00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:32,901
Now, go put your little
shorts on. Let's go play.
381
00:17:32,901 --> 00:17:34,501
Hey, then we'll get
drinks at the bar?
382
00:17:34,501 --> 00:17:35,501
Sure.
383
00:17:35,501 --> 00:17:36,868
And smoke cigars
in the lounge?
384
00:17:36,868 --> 00:17:37,868
Sounds good.
385
00:17:37,868 --> 00:17:39,267
And do yoga on
the South Patio?
386
00:17:44,434 --> 00:17:46,501
That's fine.
387
00:17:47,501 --> 00:17:48,868
I was just messing
with you.
388
00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:51,067
Ah, are we gonna hit
this fuzzy ball around or what?
389
00:17:51,067 --> 00:17:54,000
Yeah. Yeah, but, uh, we gotta
make one stop first.
390
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,567
And when you invest
in a time-share,
391
00:17:55,567 --> 00:17:57,734
you're not limited
to one location.
392
00:17:57,734 --> 00:17:59,901
Our one-time membership fee
gives you access
393
00:17:59,901 --> 00:18:03,200
to 15 other prime resorts
all over America,
394
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,434
including Hawaii.
395
00:18:05,434 --> 00:18:07,801
That sounds too good
to pass up.
396
00:18:07,801 --> 00:18:09,767
Stay strong.
397
00:18:09,767 --> 00:18:12,801
So instead of continuing to
throw money away on vacations,
398
00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:14,734
you'll be purchasing
an asset
399
00:18:14,734 --> 00:18:16,434
that increases
in value.
400
00:18:16,434 --> 00:18:17,901
I-I can't afford
not to buy this.
401
00:18:17,901 --> 00:18:19,734
Just shut up and stare.
402
00:18:19,734 --> 00:18:21,901
Enjoy pride of ownership
that you can pass on
403
00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:23,968
to the next generation,
when you purchase a unit
404
00:18:23,968 --> 00:18:25,300
or a phase three
offer.
405
00:18:25,300 --> 00:18:27,000
Do you like cleaning up--?
406
00:18:33,801 --> 00:18:36,267
Hey, Audrey.
Hey. Listen.
I just wanna make sure you know
407
00:18:36,267 --> 00:18:39,167
I had no idea Jeff was getting
a deal for bringing you guys.
408
00:18:39,167 --> 00:18:40,634
Oh, I know. Don't
worry about it.
409
00:18:40,634 --> 00:18:42,234
And don't take it
personally.
410
00:18:42,234 --> 00:18:45,100
I mean, Jeff still tries to use
his student ID at the movies.
411
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:46,234
Really?
412
00:18:46,234 --> 00:18:48,934
Yeah. It does not go well.
413
00:18:48,934 --> 00:18:50,868
Well, we still have
the rest of the weekend.
414
00:18:50,868 --> 00:18:52,434
Hey, you wanna go
check out the pool?
415
00:18:52,434 --> 00:18:54,367
Sure. Yeah.
Let's put our suits on.
416
00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:56,267
Both of us or just you?
417
00:18:56,267 --> 00:18:57,601
What?
418
00:18:57,601 --> 00:18:59,334
Sorry, it's just...
419
00:18:59,334 --> 00:19:00,734
you know, before,
at the hot tub,
420
00:19:00,734 --> 00:19:01,934
I was naked
and you weren't,
421
00:19:01,934 --> 00:19:03,934
and it just made me feel
a little weird.
422
00:19:03,934 --> 00:19:07,367
Oh, my God. Is that why
you put your robe on
423
00:19:07,367 --> 00:19:08,834
while you were
still in the tub?
424
00:19:08,834 --> 00:19:10,667
Yeah. Yeah.
425
00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:12,667
That thing is absorbent.
426
00:19:12,667 --> 00:19:14,234
Well, I don't want you
to feel weird.
427
00:19:14,234 --> 00:19:15,667
How can I make
this better?
428
00:19:15,667 --> 00:19:17,601
You-- Don't--
Just forget it.
429
00:19:17,601 --> 00:19:18,934
Seriously. I'll get over it.
430
00:19:18,934 --> 00:19:20,834
Well, what if I take
my clothes off right now?
431
00:19:20,834 --> 00:19:22,968
What? Why?
432
00:19:22,968 --> 00:19:25,400
It'll even things out.
I'm happy to do it.
Oh, Jen,
433
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:26,767
you don't have to--
Please.
434
00:19:26,767 --> 00:19:28,868
I've stripped for a lot
dumber reasons than this.
435
00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:30,868
Honey, this is
my problem. It's-- Well--
436
00:19:30,868 --> 00:19:32,133
Wow. There you go.
437
00:19:32,133 --> 00:19:33,767
Heh.
438
00:19:33,767 --> 00:19:34,767
Oh.
439
00:19:38,467 --> 00:19:41,167
Very special weekend
indeed.
440
00:19:48,868 --> 00:19:50,634
Thanks again, you guys,
for inviting us.
441
00:19:50,634 --> 00:19:52,300
Oh, we loved
having you.
442
00:19:52,300 --> 00:19:54,467
And thanks for picking up
the tab for our weekend.
443
00:19:54,467 --> 00:19:56,467
It would've been fun
even if it wasn't free.
444
00:19:56,467 --> 00:19:59,701
But it was free.
Totally free.
445
00:19:59,701 --> 00:20:02,601
You're gonna help me get out of
this time-share thing, right?
446
00:20:04,567 --> 00:20:06,767
I'll see what I can do,
you rube.
447
00:20:15,033 --> 00:20:17,000
Hey, just wanted to,
uh, return this.
448
00:20:21,901 --> 00:20:24,601
Oh, why? Did one of
your dates wear this?
449
00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:28,200
Uh, yeah, let's--
450
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,133
Let's say that.
31772
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