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1
00:00:08,067 --> 00:00:09,367
Hey, where's Audrey?
2
00:00:09,367 --> 00:00:11,734
Oh, hey.
She had to take a phone call.
3
00:00:12,701 --> 00:00:14,100
So how are things?
4
00:00:14,100 --> 00:00:15,501
Good.
How are things with you?
5
00:00:15,501 --> 00:00:17,634
Oh, well,
my mom's been calling a lot,
6
00:00:17,634 --> 00:00:19,133
and she keeps
threatening to visit
7
00:00:19,133 --> 00:00:20,634
but she never pulls
the trigger,
8
00:00:20,634 --> 00:00:22,868
and even if she did visit,
it would be the three of us
9
00:00:22,868 --> 00:00:25,133
sharing the one bathroom,
and that would be awkward,
10
00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:26,534
and so you know--
11
00:00:26,534 --> 00:00:27,701
So things are good, right?
12
00:00:29,367 --> 00:00:30,501
Hey. Sorry I'm late.
Hey.
13
00:00:30,501 --> 00:00:32,300
I couldn't get off the phone
with Sheila.
14
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:33,767
She just kept talking and
talking.
15
00:00:33,767 --> 00:00:35,567
Oh, boy, I know how that goes.
16
00:00:38,167 --> 00:00:39,734
She's great,
but all she talks about
17
00:00:39,734 --> 00:00:41,267
is how she can't find a guy.
18
00:00:41,267 --> 00:00:43,133
She's always coming
into my office saying,
19
00:00:43,133 --> 00:00:46,601
"You're so lucky to be married,
you're so lucky to have Jeff."
20
00:00:46,601 --> 00:00:49,801
I keep telling her,
I'm not that lucky.
21
00:00:51,234 --> 00:00:53,167
Thanks, hon.
22
00:00:53,167 --> 00:00:55,334
Sorry, I'm just saying
it's not perfect.
23
00:00:55,334 --> 00:00:57,400
I tell her you never
clean up after yourself.
24
00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,534
You cut your toenails in bed.
25
00:00:59,534 --> 00:01:02,467
I find chest hair everywhere.
26
00:01:04,033 --> 00:01:06,300
I'm hoping it's chest hair.
27
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:11,067
You keep hoping.
I don't wanna burst that bubble.
28
00:01:12,667 --> 00:01:15,400
Anyway, I tell her all of that,
and still she wants a guy.
29
00:01:15,400 --> 00:01:16,734
Oh. I know a guy.
30
00:01:16,734 --> 00:01:18,934
Let's fix 'em up.
That's a great idea.
31
00:01:18,934 --> 00:01:21,300
Oh, God.
Here we go.
32
00:01:21,300 --> 00:01:23,734
Why are you always
such a jerk about fix-ups?
33
00:01:23,734 --> 00:01:26,300
Because every time you do one
it goes sour,
34
00:01:26,300 --> 00:01:28,601
then you get upset,
and then you get mad at me
35
00:01:28,601 --> 00:01:30,534
because I say, "I told you so."
36
00:01:30,534 --> 00:01:32,300
Why don't you just not say
"I told you so?"
37
00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:36,267
Because that's the only part
of the whole thing that I enjoy.
38
00:02:03,167 --> 00:02:05,901
So Chloe and I wind up
trying every position
39
00:02:05,901 --> 00:02:07,133
that harness could handle.
40
00:02:07,133 --> 00:02:09,167
Until the sun came up.
Heh-ha-ha.
41
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:12,167
And to answer your question,
no, Jen,
42
00:02:12,167 --> 00:02:13,567
I do not know what time it is.
43
00:02:14,701 --> 00:02:16,234
Well,
I can't wait to meet her...
44
00:02:16,234 --> 00:02:18,167
after I've had my shots.
45
00:02:20,868 --> 00:02:22,801
Oh, hey, uh, let's play
46
00:02:22,801 --> 00:02:24,801
Why-Would-Chloe-Be-Attracted-
To-Russell.
47
00:02:24,801 --> 00:02:28,133
Oh, I'll take, uh,
"Getting back at Daddy."
48
00:02:28,133 --> 00:02:30,834
Um, I'll take
"Too drunk to walk."
49
00:02:30,834 --> 00:02:33,100
You guys are mean.
50
00:02:33,100 --> 00:02:34,534
But Adam nailed it.
51
00:02:34,534 --> 00:02:37,133
You know,
despite all my saucy talk,
52
00:02:37,133 --> 00:02:38,334
I really like Chloe.
53
00:02:38,334 --> 00:02:40,534
She's very sweet,
she could be a keeper.
54
00:02:43,267 --> 00:02:44,901
Hey, what's up?
55
00:02:44,901 --> 00:02:46,434
Ah! You're kidding.
56
00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:48,234
Are you kidding?
57
00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:50,667
You're kidding.
Oh, that's great.
58
00:02:50,667 --> 00:02:52,000
We got tickets to see
59
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:53,701
The Golden Staircase
on Broadway.
60
00:02:53,701 --> 00:02:56,033
Oh, God, let her be kidding.
61
00:02:59,534 --> 00:03:00,567
Wow.
62
00:03:12,667 --> 00:03:14,033
I'll call you later.
Bye.
63
00:03:14,033 --> 00:03:15,968
That is the hottest
musical in town.
64
00:03:15,968 --> 00:03:17,300
We are so lucky.
65
00:03:17,300 --> 00:03:20,067
Yeah, lucky, lucky, lucky us.
66
00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:21,400
Hey, hey.
67
00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:23,734
Do you guys know that girl
who just got on the elevator?
68
00:03:23,734 --> 00:03:27,667
Uh, girl? What?
No, I-I didn't notice any girl.
69
00:03:27,667 --> 00:03:30,801
You don't have to pretend
you don't see other women.
70
00:03:30,801 --> 00:03:34,701
Okay. Uh, honey-blond hair,
sky-blue eyes, full, pouty lips.
71
00:03:34,701 --> 00:03:37,434
What, you didn't
get her bra size?
72
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:39,167
No, she wasn't wearing one.
73
00:03:40,067 --> 00:03:41,334
She's an angel.
74
00:03:41,334 --> 00:03:44,167
I saw her eyes,
we had some sort of connection.
75
00:03:44,167 --> 00:03:45,601
Does she live in this building?
76
00:03:45,601 --> 00:03:47,300
I've seen her around,
I think she might.
77
00:03:47,300 --> 00:03:48,934
What do you care?
You have Chloe.
78
00:03:48,934 --> 00:03:50,534
I know,
79
00:03:50,534 --> 00:03:52,767
but that one's better.
80
00:03:57,100 --> 00:03:58,968
And since we can buy
four house seats,
81
00:03:58,968 --> 00:04:00,501
we wanted to invite you guys.
82
00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:03,667
Oh, my God, I've been dying
to see The Golden Staircase.
83
00:04:03,667 --> 00:04:06,267
I haven't been to
a Broadway show in forever.
84
00:04:06,267 --> 00:04:08,467
Thanks for that, by the way.
85
00:04:10,534 --> 00:04:12,767
I'm only thinking about
of the other theatergoers.
86
00:04:12,767 --> 00:04:14,601
Why should they have
to listen to me snoring?
87
00:04:15,901 --> 00:04:17,534
Anyway,
how much are the tickets?
88
00:04:17,534 --> 00:04:18,868
They're on us.
89
00:04:18,868 --> 00:04:21,200
Oh, you guys don't have to--
Well, thank you.
90
00:04:22,734 --> 00:04:24,400
Thank you.
91
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:26,267
God, we are gonna
have so much fun.
92
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:27,968
You know,
the costumes are fantastic.
93
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:29,901
Oh, and there's this
amazing love ballad.
94
00:04:29,901 --> 00:04:31,400
I'll make you a deal.
95
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:33,901
Before the show I'll stab you,
96
00:04:33,901 --> 00:04:36,334
and while you're slowly dying,
you shoot me.
97
00:04:37,767 --> 00:04:39,100
Yes, that's a deal.
98
00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:40,734
Oh, there's Jack and Sheila.
99
00:04:40,734 --> 00:04:42,400
Oh. Oh, my God,
100
00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,033
our fix-up.
They went out last night.
101
00:04:44,033 --> 00:04:46,334
And here they are at breakfast.
102
00:04:46,334 --> 00:04:48,334
With matching bed head.
103
00:04:48,334 --> 00:04:49,934
I knew they would
make a great couple.
104
00:04:49,934 --> 00:04:52,834
Why? He's horny and she's easy?
105
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,400
Come on. Let's go say hi.
106
00:04:57,100 --> 00:05:00,267
Why do women want everyone
in the world to be paired off?
107
00:05:00,267 --> 00:05:02,767
You know, they're like that--
That boat guy.
108
00:05:02,767 --> 00:05:04,767
Noah?
109
00:05:04,767 --> 00:05:08,334
No, no, Captain Stubing
from TheLove Boat.
110
00:05:08,334 --> 00:05:09,734
My mistake.
111
00:05:11,267 --> 00:05:12,934
You know,
the problem with this fix-up
112
00:05:12,934 --> 00:05:14,868
is Jennifer's involved.
113
00:05:14,868 --> 00:05:16,434
Now, when it blows up--
And it will.
114
00:05:16,434 --> 00:05:18,133
--the girls are gonna
take sides,
115
00:05:18,133 --> 00:05:19,901
they'll each gonna defend
their person,
116
00:05:19,901 --> 00:05:21,100
and they'll end up in a fight.
117
00:05:21,100 --> 00:05:22,400
So Jack will be mad at Jennifer,
118
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:23,834
Sheila will be mad at Audrey,
119
00:05:23,834 --> 00:05:26,133
and then Audrey and Jennifer
will be mad at each other.
120
00:05:26,133 --> 00:05:29,100
Yeah, it's gonna screw up
relationships all around,
121
00:05:29,100 --> 00:05:30,868
and we're going to have
to hear about it.
122
00:05:30,868 --> 00:05:33,501
God, why does everything bad
happen to us?
123
00:05:35,701 --> 00:05:37,534
Well, there are people
in the world
124
00:05:37,534 --> 00:05:39,634
that have it a lot worse off
than we do.
125
00:05:39,634 --> 00:05:42,734
Okay, this weekend we're going
on a harbor dinner cruise
126
00:05:42,734 --> 00:05:43,667
with Jack and Sheila.
127
00:05:46,868 --> 00:05:48,534
I stand corrected.
128
00:05:50,534 --> 00:05:51,834
Boy, was that a good run.
129
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,467
Too bad you couldn't
keep up with me.
130
00:05:53,467 --> 00:05:54,901
Was it that I couldn't keep up,
131
00:05:54,901 --> 00:05:57,300
or was I just back there
enjoying the view?
132
00:05:57,300 --> 00:05:58,701
You couldn't keep up.
133
00:05:58,701 --> 00:06:01,133
You didn't even know
I stopped for gelato.
Oh.
134
00:06:01,133 --> 00:06:03,567
You had gelato?
I want gelato.
135
00:06:06,167 --> 00:06:07,200
Oh.
136
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,234
Was I supposed to be home?
No.
137
00:06:09,234 --> 00:06:10,534
Think I got nothing better to do
138
00:06:10,534 --> 00:06:11,734
than hang out and wait for you?
139
00:06:12,801 --> 00:06:14,534
Basically, yeah.
Yeah.
140
00:06:14,534 --> 00:06:16,234
Well, you're wrong.
141
00:06:16,234 --> 00:06:18,133
I'm riding up and down
on the elevator all day
142
00:06:18,133 --> 00:06:20,567
in hopes of running
into my dream girl.
143
00:06:20,567 --> 00:06:21,767
Were we wrong.
144
00:06:21,767 --> 00:06:24,167
You have a full life.
145
00:06:24,167 --> 00:06:26,167
Hey, the doorman's gonna
kick you out, man.
146
00:06:26,167 --> 00:06:27,534
No, he's not. He's cool.
147
00:06:27,534 --> 00:06:29,767
Oscar. What's up?
148
00:06:29,767 --> 00:06:31,167
I explained to him my sitch,
149
00:06:31,167 --> 00:06:33,701
and turns out
he's a romantic too.
150
00:06:33,701 --> 00:06:34,968
Romantic?
151
00:06:34,968 --> 00:06:37,334
He stares at my chest
every time I walk by him.
152
00:06:37,334 --> 00:06:39,667
Heh. Yeah, he's good peeps.
153
00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:42,334
You know, there's something
special about this girl.
154
00:06:42,334 --> 00:06:44,767
She could be the one.
155
00:06:44,767 --> 00:06:47,400
Hm.
The one before the next one.
156
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:50,234
You know what? You don't know
what I felt when I saw her.
157
00:06:50,234 --> 00:06:51,667
I do, it's called an erection.
158
00:06:53,334 --> 00:06:55,434
No, it wasn't
down there.
159
00:06:55,434 --> 00:06:58,634
I felt something here.
160
00:06:58,634 --> 00:07:01,000
It was like my heart
had an erection.
161
00:07:02,534 --> 00:07:04,701
And here comes my gelato.
162
00:07:11,133 --> 00:07:12,968
Thank you, you guys.
163
00:07:12,968 --> 00:07:14,467
This triple date
was a great idea.
164
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:17,133
Yeah, I don't think I've ever
eaten on a boat before.
165
00:07:17,133 --> 00:07:19,601
We've been out three times,
you're telling me this now?
166
00:07:19,601 --> 00:07:21,000
I feel like I don't
even know you.
167
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:21,934
Heh-heh. Jack.
168
00:07:24,801 --> 00:07:27,300
Look how cute they are.
I know.
169
00:07:27,300 --> 00:07:29,434
We did that.
Mm-hm.
170
00:07:29,434 --> 00:07:31,567
Hey, did you remember
to take your sea sick pills?
171
00:07:31,567 --> 00:07:32,934
Yeah, but for the record,
172
00:07:32,934 --> 00:07:34,868
it's not the boat
that's making me nauseous.
173
00:07:36,234 --> 00:07:37,734
Ladies and gentlemen,
174
00:07:37,734 --> 00:07:39,734
welcome aboard
the Starlight Harbor Cruise.
175
00:07:39,734 --> 00:07:41,200
We'll be departing
in 10 minutes.
176
00:07:43,267 --> 00:07:45,501
Looks like Jack and Sheila
are going strong.
177
00:07:45,501 --> 00:07:48,067
Maybe Jennifer and Audrey won't
end up in a fight after all.
178
00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:50,634
Yeah, but now I'm gonna
have to hear Audrey gloat
179
00:07:50,634 --> 00:07:53,400
about her fix-up success.
180
00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:56,501
Maybe I can parlay
that into some sex.
181
00:07:56,501 --> 00:07:58,334
That'll teach her
not to gloat.
182
00:07:59,767 --> 00:08:01,434
Hey, fellas.
183
00:08:01,434 --> 00:08:02,567
Hey.
184
00:08:02,567 --> 00:08:04,367
So you and Sheila
are going strong, huh?
185
00:08:04,367 --> 00:08:06,200
Yeah, she's great.
186
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,767
The women are gone.
We don't have to do this.
187
00:08:08,767 --> 00:08:10,367
Well, look,
188
00:08:10,367 --> 00:08:13,067
Sheila's the first blind date
I've had that's worked out.
189
00:08:13,067 --> 00:08:14,901
I mean,
she's funny, she's attractive.
190
00:08:14,901 --> 00:08:17,868
Plus, we're at exactly
the same point in our lives.
191
00:08:17,868 --> 00:08:19,434
Really?
You don't look 38.
192
00:08:19,434 --> 00:08:22,167
Oh. No, I'm 32.
193
00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:23,167
So is Sheila.
194
00:08:23,167 --> 00:08:25,033
No, she's 38.
195
00:08:25,033 --> 00:08:27,567
She says so whenever
she complains to Audrey
196
00:08:27,567 --> 00:08:30,267
about her biological
clock ticking.
197
00:08:31,434 --> 00:08:32,601
H-her what?
198
00:08:32,601 --> 00:08:34,334
Biologic--
199
00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:42,167
Some clock that she bought
that doesn't work right.
200
00:08:42,167 --> 00:08:45,534
She's always complaining
about it.
201
00:08:45,534 --> 00:08:46,534
Should just return it.
202
00:08:48,300 --> 00:08:49,501
Get a new one.
203
00:08:50,901 --> 00:08:52,901
That's what I'd do.
204
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:05,901
Are you the guy looking
for the blond girl?
205
00:09:05,901 --> 00:09:07,367
Yeah.
206
00:09:07,367 --> 00:09:09,434
Thought I saw her earlier,
but it just turned out
207
00:09:09,434 --> 00:09:12,067
to be the albino
that lives on 6.
208
00:09:12,067 --> 00:09:13,234
Wait, do you know who she is?
209
00:09:13,234 --> 00:09:15,267
No, I don't notice girls much.
210
00:09:15,267 --> 00:09:16,634
Oh.
211
00:09:18,567 --> 00:09:19,901
Oh. Oh, I get it.
212
00:09:19,901 --> 00:09:21,501
Hey, do you know
a good dry-cleaner?
213
00:09:21,501 --> 00:09:22,634
You guys always seem to know.
214
00:09:24,067 --> 00:09:25,701
I'd tell you,
but I don't know
215
00:09:25,701 --> 00:09:27,667
if any of that
is worth dry-cleaning.
216
00:09:29,167 --> 00:09:31,200
Wow. Well,
you're really doing wonders
217
00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:34,267
to get rid of that
bitchy stereotype.
218
00:09:34,267 --> 00:09:36,567
Well, I'm not the one
riding the elevator all day.
219
00:09:36,567 --> 00:09:39,501
Dude, I don't ride
the elevator all day.
220
00:09:43,167 --> 00:09:45,801
Pizza delivery for a
"Russell on the elevator."
221
00:09:45,801 --> 00:09:49,667
Oh. No, no,
that's Russell Elevator,
222
00:09:49,667 --> 00:09:52,634
that's his name.
He lives in the building. Yeah.
223
00:09:52,634 --> 00:09:56,434
You know what? I'll take that.
I'll give that to Mr. Elevator,
224
00:09:56,434 --> 00:10:00,067
and I feel like maybe
he ordered a soda too.
225
00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:01,033
Oh.
226
00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:05,000
There you go.
227
00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:10,267
You had to tell Jack
Sheila wants a baby.
228
00:10:10,267 --> 00:10:14,434
I didn't have to,
it just sort of slipped out.
229
00:10:14,434 --> 00:10:15,968
You know,
I-I did not think
230
00:10:15,968 --> 00:10:17,367
that Jack was gonna make
the dock
231
00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:20,067
when he leaped off the boat.
232
00:10:20,067 --> 00:10:22,734
Look, he would have
found out eventually.
233
00:10:22,734 --> 00:10:24,934
Yeah, but maybe by then
he would have been so in love
234
00:10:24,934 --> 00:10:25,968
he wouldn't have cared.
235
00:10:25,968 --> 00:10:29,000
I may need another seasick pill.
236
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,467
I can't believe Sheila
would lie to Jack like that.
237
00:10:32,467 --> 00:10:35,400
I cannot believe
Jack is so shallow
238
00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:36,567
he couldn't deal with it.
239
00:10:36,567 --> 00:10:38,534
Since when is it shallow
to not want to go out
240
00:10:38,534 --> 00:10:39,801
with someone who tricked you?
241
00:10:39,801 --> 00:10:41,400
Look, girls, there's no reason
242
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:42,667
to point fingers here.
243
00:10:42,667 --> 00:10:44,801
You guys both tried
to do a really nice thing.
244
00:10:44,801 --> 00:10:46,901
Come on, you guys
should feel good that you tried.
245
00:10:46,901 --> 00:10:48,801
Yeah. I guess.
246
00:10:48,801 --> 00:10:50,467
Hey, I have a new
fix-up we can try:
247
00:10:50,467 --> 00:10:51,968
vodka, meet tonic.
248
00:10:51,968 --> 00:10:53,400
Oh, that is such a good couple.
249
00:10:55,367 --> 00:10:57,300
That was close.
250
00:10:57,300 --> 00:10:58,300
Nice work.
251
00:10:58,300 --> 00:10:59,834
Oh, thanks. You too.
252
00:10:59,834 --> 00:11:01,734
We just prevented
the Audrey and Jennifer
253
00:11:01,734 --> 00:11:03,100
Fix-Up Disaster Fight.
254
00:11:03,100 --> 00:11:04,367
To us
255
00:11:04,367 --> 00:11:05,601
being better than them.
256
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:08,934
Mm.
257
00:11:08,934 --> 00:11:10,601
Hey, look at this.
258
00:11:10,601 --> 00:11:13,267
As a reward,
we get extra food for free.
259
00:11:13,267 --> 00:11:14,701
Thank you, Jack and Sheila.
260
00:11:14,701 --> 00:11:16,868
Actually, Audrey put Jack
and Sheila's dinners
261
00:11:16,868 --> 00:11:18,501
on our credit card.
Oh.
262
00:11:18,501 --> 00:11:20,467
Well, in that case,
thank you, Jeff.
263
00:11:20,467 --> 00:11:21,467
Whoa.
264
00:11:21,467 --> 00:11:23,701
I should only be responsible
for Sheila.
265
00:11:23,701 --> 00:11:25,033
So Jack's on your tab.
266
00:11:25,033 --> 00:11:26,467
Me? No, you're the one
267
00:11:26,467 --> 00:11:28,334
who let the biological clock
out of the bag.
268
00:11:28,334 --> 00:11:30,968
Look, just enjoy that shrimp.
You're buying it.
269
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,868
Not paying for it.
Not eating it.
270
00:11:34,868 --> 00:11:37,634
Look, I'm responsible
for my woman's fix-up failure.
271
00:11:37,634 --> 00:11:39,567
You should be responsible
for yours.
272
00:11:39,567 --> 00:11:41,534
Mine wasn't the problem.
You can't blame Jack
273
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:44,400
for not wanting
to date Grandma Sheila.
274
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,133
Jack could do a lot worse,
275
00:11:46,133 --> 00:11:48,801
and I'm sure that he will
with that cheesy earring.
276
00:11:48,801 --> 00:11:52,334
This is a dinner cruise,
you're not a pirate.
277
00:11:52,334 --> 00:11:54,968
Well, that's too bad, because
if he wore a patch over his eye,
278
00:11:54,968 --> 00:11:57,067
maybe he would have believed
that Sheila was 32.
279
00:11:57,067 --> 00:11:59,801
Ar-r-r, I'm Jack,
me and me earring
280
00:11:59,801 --> 00:12:02,501
are gonna go pillage the buffet.
281
00:12:02,501 --> 00:12:04,601
Why don't you say that again,
sonny?
282
00:12:04,601 --> 00:12:05,868
I'm Sheila, I can't hear you.
283
00:12:05,868 --> 00:12:07,501
Ar-r-r!
284
00:12:07,501 --> 00:12:09,868
Look at the size of these shr--
Don't.
285
00:12:13,667 --> 00:12:16,534
Didn't eat it, doesn't count.
286
00:12:26,033 --> 00:12:28,868
Okay, which shoe?
287
00:12:28,868 --> 00:12:31,234
Ah, the old shoe game.
288
00:12:31,234 --> 00:12:33,634
The right one.
289
00:12:33,634 --> 00:12:35,200
Wait. My right or yours?
Yours.
290
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:37,968
Oh.
Those kind of pinch my toes.
291
00:12:37,968 --> 00:12:39,300
I mean, the other one.
292
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,434
Well, those give me
a heel blister.
293
00:12:41,434 --> 00:12:43,934
You got me again.
294
00:12:43,934 --> 00:12:48,734
All right, I'll just paint
my big toe and wear my sandals.
295
00:12:48,734 --> 00:12:51,000
You are just sitting
in the audience tonight, right?
296
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,734
You're not actually dancing
in The Golden Staircase?
297
00:12:53,734 --> 00:12:55,200
I want to look good.
298
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,567
We don't go out that often.
299
00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:59,167
What are you talking about? We
were just on that dinner cruise.
300
00:12:59,167 --> 00:13:02,033
Speaking of which, did you
call Sheila? How's she doing?
301
00:13:02,033 --> 00:13:06,334
I am not asking Sheila
to pay for her dinner.
302
00:13:06,334 --> 00:13:09,400
In that case,
I wonder how Jack's doing.
303
00:13:10,701 --> 00:13:13,267
It's not that much money,
just let it go.
304
00:13:13,267 --> 00:13:15,467
And no, I don't want you
bickering about it
305
00:13:15,467 --> 00:13:16,501
with Adam tonight.
306
00:13:16,501 --> 00:13:18,000
You know what,
307
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:19,968
it's not about the money,
it's the principle.
308
00:13:19,968 --> 00:13:21,534
A man pays what he owes.
309
00:13:21,534 --> 00:13:25,033
If I learned one thing from
my father's bookie, it was that.
310
00:13:26,667 --> 00:13:28,167
Jeff, you look handsome.
311
00:13:28,167 --> 00:13:30,000
Thank you, Jennifer.
You look nice too.
312
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:33,734
Adam, you would look better
if you dropped about 150.
313
00:13:33,734 --> 00:13:35,701
I've been thinking
about it and you're right.
314
00:13:35,701 --> 00:13:36,968
I should pay you.
Ah.
315
00:13:36,968 --> 00:13:38,701
I'm glad you finally
see things my way.
316
00:13:38,701 --> 00:13:40,100
Here you go.
What are those?
317
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:41,267
Tickets for tonight.
318
00:13:41,267 --> 00:13:43,234
They're actually worth
more than the cruise,
319
00:13:43,234 --> 00:13:45,100
so during intermission,
drinks are on you.
320
00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:46,300
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
321
00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:48,000
You already gave us
those as a gift.
322
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,133
Yes, we did.
323
00:13:49,133 --> 00:13:50,334
I will just write you a check.
324
00:13:50,334 --> 00:13:53,033
Stay out of this, woman.
325
00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:54,868
A man should pay
for his mistakes,
326
00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:56,467
this is all Jeff's mistake.
327
00:13:56,467 --> 00:13:58,934
You took the tickets,
so we're even.
328
00:13:58,934 --> 00:14:02,200
You can't magically
turn a gift into compensation.
329
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,033
Oh, but I just did.
330
00:14:04,033 --> 00:14:06,367
Shazam.
331
00:14:06,367 --> 00:14:09,000
Then Audrey and I aren't going.
332
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:12,467
I'm so excited to see this show.
333
00:14:12,467 --> 00:14:14,534
I know, it's gonna be great.
Yeah, it should be.
334
00:14:14,534 --> 00:14:16,701
Should be worth every penny,
eh, Jeff?
335
00:14:16,701 --> 00:14:18,868
Well, I wouldn't know,
our tickets were free.
336
00:14:18,868 --> 00:14:21,067
Thanks again for the free
tickets, Jennifer.
337
00:14:21,067 --> 00:14:24,501
Why don't you two just
knock it off? This is good.
338
00:14:24,501 --> 00:14:27,100
That'll be 9.50, please.
339
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,467
Jeez.
340
00:14:36,467 --> 00:14:39,934
Sometimes I envy lesbians.
341
00:14:39,934 --> 00:14:41,200
I could tell you some stories.
342
00:14:50,934 --> 00:14:52,267
Any luck, ese?
343
00:14:52,267 --> 00:14:54,234
No, no luck, Oscar.
344
00:14:54,234 --> 00:14:56,100
Maybe I should just give it up.
345
00:14:56,100 --> 00:14:58,901
No. You said this girl
might be your destiny.
346
00:14:58,901 --> 00:15:01,601
There's nothing more important
than finding true love.
347
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:04,167
True dat, mi amigo.
348
00:15:08,567 --> 00:15:10,601
Hey, Mrs. Fulford.
349
00:15:10,601 --> 00:15:11,934
Oh, hello, Rusty.
350
00:15:11,934 --> 00:15:14,000
Have you found her yet?
351
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,834
Heh-heh.
No, not yet.
352
00:15:15,834 --> 00:15:18,501
Well, when you do, she's going
to be so touched by how hard
353
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:19,767
you've worked to find her.
354
00:15:19,767 --> 00:15:21,267
Well, that's what I'm hoping.
355
00:15:21,267 --> 00:15:22,734
And if you don't find her,
356
00:15:22,734 --> 00:15:25,801
I could set you up
with someone nice from my work.
357
00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:29,133
Oh, that'll be great.
I might do that
358
00:15:29,133 --> 00:15:30,701
when I turn 83.
359
00:15:33,901 --> 00:15:35,000
Really, Oscar?
360
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,634
You're checking out
Mrs. Fulford?
361
00:15:37,634 --> 00:15:40,701
I squint and imagine what she
looked like 40 years ago.
362
00:15:40,701 --> 00:15:42,334
Ooh.
363
00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,667
Try going back 50.
364
00:15:47,968 --> 00:15:49,601
Ooh.
365
00:15:50,767 --> 00:15:53,801
Pretty ballsy of you
to run out without paying.
366
00:15:53,801 --> 00:15:55,067
You were closer to the driver.
367
00:15:55,067 --> 00:15:56,400
You were.
You were.
368
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:57,501
Were not.
369
00:15:57,501 --> 00:15:59,734
Hey, you are being
petty and annoying.
370
00:15:59,734 --> 00:16:00,934
Ha-ha, you got in trouble.
371
00:16:00,934 --> 00:16:02,300
You too.
372
00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:03,300
Yeah, don't blame us.
373
00:16:03,300 --> 00:16:06,067
Your match-making
caused all this.
374
00:16:06,067 --> 00:16:07,667
Oh, how do you figure?
375
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:08,934
If you'd listened to me
376
00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:10,901
and never done the fix-up
to begin with,
377
00:16:10,901 --> 00:16:13,767
there wouldn't be a problem
with Adam--
Jeff.
378
00:16:13,767 --> 00:16:15,634
--cheaping out
on the dinner cruise seats,
379
00:16:15,634 --> 00:16:17,534
and Adam--
Jeff.
380
00:16:17,534 --> 00:16:18,734
--would have paid for the cab.
381
00:16:20,334 --> 00:16:21,400
Adam.
Jeff.
Oh.
382
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:23,267
All right, fine.
You know what? You win.
383
00:16:23,267 --> 00:16:24,334
No more fix-ups.
384
00:16:24,334 --> 00:16:26,400
I'm not gonna say
I told you so.
385
00:16:27,667 --> 00:16:30,868
Mostly because of that
look right there.
386
00:16:30,868 --> 00:16:32,767
Okay, you two are not
gonna ruin this.
387
00:16:32,767 --> 00:16:34,200
Here are your tickets.
388
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,968
You stay out here
and solve your problem,
389
00:16:35,968 --> 00:16:37,334
and don't come in until you do.
390
00:16:37,334 --> 00:16:38,901
He started it.
Did not.
391
00:16:38,901 --> 00:16:42,968
I don't care who started it,
it's over. Understand?
392
00:16:42,968 --> 00:16:45,634
Don't just nod.
Use your words.
393
00:16:45,634 --> 00:16:46,667
Yes.
Yes.
394
00:16:46,667 --> 00:16:47,834
Okay. Let's go.
395
00:16:50,767 --> 00:16:51,834
I'm not giving in.
396
00:16:51,834 --> 00:16:53,734
I'll stand out here all night.
397
00:16:53,734 --> 00:16:55,367
Is anybody selling a ticket?
398
00:16:55,367 --> 00:16:56,734
I need one ticket.
399
00:17:04,834 --> 00:17:06,501
I'm mad at Adam,
but I think making him
400
00:17:06,501 --> 00:17:08,601
sit through this show
will be punishment enough.
401
00:17:08,601 --> 00:17:11,000
Oh, I'm not letting Jeff
sleep through a minute of this.
402
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:14,300
Plus I'm buying the soundtrack.
403
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:19,834
I'm sorry, that seat's is taken.
404
00:17:19,834 --> 00:17:21,133
This is G24, isn't it?
405
00:17:21,133 --> 00:17:23,300
I just bought this ticket
from a scalper outside.
406
00:17:26,234 --> 00:17:27,667
Unbelievable.
407
00:17:27,667 --> 00:17:29,300
Jeff sold his ticket.
408
00:17:29,300 --> 00:17:30,434
Oh, I'm so sorry,
409
00:17:30,434 --> 00:17:32,501
I cannot believe
he did that.
410
00:17:32,501 --> 00:17:33,968
But don't worry,
you and Adam and I
411
00:17:33,968 --> 00:17:35,067
will still have a good time.
412
00:17:41,734 --> 00:17:43,267
Unbelievable.
413
00:17:44,734 --> 00:17:47,033
Thank you, Golden Staircase.
414
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:49,567
Hey, look at me.
I'm smoking Act I.
415
00:17:52,734 --> 00:17:55,734
You do realize when we get home,
we're dead.
416
00:17:55,734 --> 00:17:58,567
Totally.
417
00:17:58,567 --> 00:18:01,734
But they can never take
this away from us.
418
00:18:01,734 --> 00:18:04,701
It's funny, if Jen and Audrey
hadn't done that fix-up,
419
00:18:04,701 --> 00:18:06,300
we wouldn't have
had that argument,
420
00:18:06,300 --> 00:18:08,801
and we'd be stuck
in the theater right now.
421
00:18:08,801 --> 00:18:11,567
Maybe I was wrong about fix-ups.
422
00:18:11,567 --> 00:18:13,701
If they result
in not seeing musicals,
423
00:18:13,701 --> 00:18:15,734
drinking 30-year-old
single malt,
424
00:18:15,734 --> 00:18:18,334
and smoking fine cigars,
425
00:18:18,334 --> 00:18:20,467
then call me Cupid.
426
00:18:32,167 --> 00:18:34,033
Thank you.
427
00:18:34,033 --> 00:18:36,167
Hey, how's it going?
I'm Russell.
428
00:18:36,167 --> 00:18:37,167
Tiffany.
429
00:18:37,167 --> 00:18:39,200
All right, yeah.
430
00:18:40,601 --> 00:18:42,501
Listen, uh, this might sound
a little crazy,
431
00:18:42,501 --> 00:18:45,133
but I saw you get on
the elevator, like, a week ago.
432
00:18:45,133 --> 00:18:48,100
Felt like we had a connection
or something.
433
00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:50,000
So I've been
riding this every day
434
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,667
in hopes of running
into you again.
435
00:18:52,667 --> 00:18:55,801
You've been riding the elevator
for a week just to meet me?
436
00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,667
Yeah, yeah, I can't stop
thinking about you.
437
00:18:57,667 --> 00:18:59,367
I have everyone
in the building in on it.
438
00:18:59,367 --> 00:19:01,801
The doorman. Everyone's like,
"If it's your destiny--"
439
00:19:01,801 --> 00:19:02,834
Stop
440
00:19:02,834 --> 00:19:05,133
stalking me, you creep!
441
00:19:07,567 --> 00:19:11,067
Agh! Who are you?
442
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,434
Rusty, are you all right?
443
00:19:13,434 --> 00:19:15,467
Ah. Oh, yeah.
I'll be fine.
444
00:19:15,467 --> 00:19:17,267
It usually takes
about eight to 10 minutes
445
00:19:17,267 --> 00:19:19,734
for my eyes to readjust
after getting maced.
446
00:19:21,334 --> 00:19:23,100
Was that her?
Yeah.
447
00:19:23,100 --> 00:19:25,834
Yeah, we've decided
to see other people.
448
00:19:27,133 --> 00:19:29,000
Then it's time you
let me set you up
449
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,033
with one of the girls
from my office.
450
00:19:31,033 --> 00:19:33,100
Oh, well, I don't know.
I think it's too soon,
451
00:19:33,100 --> 00:19:36,801
and plus my eyes are still
burning from the mace.
452
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:38,267
Are you sure?
453
00:19:38,267 --> 00:19:40,267
I own a small modeling agency.
454
00:19:40,267 --> 00:19:41,934
Ah...
455
00:19:41,934 --> 00:19:43,801
Wait, what's that?
456
00:19:43,801 --> 00:19:47,400
No high fashion, mind you,
just swimsuits and lingerie.
457
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,100
That'll do.
458
00:19:52,534 --> 00:19:54,067
Oscar!
459
00:19:59,801 --> 00:20:01,334
Hey.
460
00:20:01,334 --> 00:20:02,734
Hey, what's up, sunshine?
461
00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:04,968
Look what we got invited to.
462
00:20:04,968 --> 00:20:07,000
Opera tickets?
463
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,234
Who hates me that much?
464
00:20:09,234 --> 00:20:11,334
Jennifer and I fixed up
the guy and the girl
465
00:20:11,334 --> 00:20:13,133
that you and Adam
sold your tickets to.
466
00:20:13,133 --> 00:20:15,000
They've been dating
and they've invited us
467
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,067
to join them at La Boh๏ฟฝme.
468
00:20:17,067 --> 00:20:18,801
All because
you scalped your ticket.
469
00:20:19,801 --> 00:20:21,467
I guess I had this coming.
470
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:26,534
Wonder how much
I could get for these.
33839
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