Original subtitles

[bold orchestral music]

[audience applauding]

And now ladies and gentlemen,

we come to the presentation of the very highest award

for the outstanding actress of the year

on the New York stage.

This year, we have seen the greatest array

in the way of talent,

more than any other season on record.

Not only have the leading roles been played by experienced

and established actors and actresses,

but the plays have been written by some of our best playwrights.

The producers and directors have been of top quality.

And as a result, New York has benefited

by having the most sensational season on record.

Now our panel of judges has viewed every play

and performance many times in order to determine

which of our fine actresses nominated

should receive this coveted award.

The nominees for the best actress are Julie Harris,

Maureen Stapleton, Alice Barrington,

Jessica Tandy and Estelle Parsons.

May I have the envelope please?

And the winner is, Alice Barrington.

[audience applauding]

[gentle piano music]

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ Forgive a little touch Of malice ♪

♪ But Alice learned Her lesson fast ♪

♪ You've got to be tough ♪

♪ If you want to last ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ They say our little game Is callous ♪

♪ But Alice charms you When she touches you ♪

♪ Beware of the spell ♪

♪ She casts over you ♪

♪ She's all that a woman Should be to a guy ♪

♪ Sweet, caring, funny, And shy ♪

♪ She lays on her loving ♪

♪ With her hair behind ♪

♪ And how you want to be ♪

♪ The boys in her band ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ She's a queen who needs A palace ♪

♪ And Alice has got To make a hit ♪

♪ So bring her up on stage ♪

♪ She will be a rage ♪

♪ Soon the world will know ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

[jazzy horns music]

♪ All about Alice ♪

[jazzy horns music]

♪ She's all that a woman Should be to her guy ♪

♪ Sweet and feminine, cunning And shy ♪

♪ She lays on her loving ♪

♪ With her hair behind ♪

♪ And how you'll fight to be ♪

♪ The boys in her band ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ 'Cause she's a queen Who needs a palace ♪

♪ And Alice has got To make a hit ♪

♪ So get her up on stage ♪

♪ She will be the rage ♪

♪ Soon the world will know ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ Oh, all about Alice ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ Oh, all about Alice ♪

Blame or no blame.

What does it matter?

George is to blame.

Yes he is.

George is to blame for, for,

for never bringing us together years ago,

for depriving us darling,

of years of joys and happiness and bliss,

which we should have enjoyed together.

Oh, I'd like to rub him out of my mind.

I'd like to obliterate him!

Make him unmade, unborn!

But alas, dear John.

I'm married to him.

And by my standards, I cannot leave him.

So go, dear John, go.

And I'll sit here and wait.

Oh dear God, I have learned to wait.

[audience applauding]

Oh, oh.

[Cora] How'd it go, sweetheart?

-Oh, darling, darling. -Did it go good?

Because you were so great.

-Just so great. -Well darling,

the audience were half and half tonight.

Half and half?

They really should know what you really are like.

You're so fantastic.

-[Mona] I know, sweetheart. -[Cora] There you go.

Oh, my god.

Did they like, did that scene go good?

You know that one that you had a little trouble with

-at rehearsal? -Yes, darling.

It was all right, I suppose.

But can you believe darling,

that after 1,000 performances

and they're still coming?

Darling, you were brilliant, as usual.

-Wasn't she, dear? -Absolutely superb.

You made my play sparkle with laughter tonight.

-You want a drink, honey? -Ah, thank you sweetheart.

-And by the way, Cora, darling. -Yes?

Your use of the English language.

Why don't you try a little better?

Your days in the carnival do come out when you speak.

Oh, bullshit.

Those carnival folks, that family of mine,

were the greatest in the business.

Do you know that my daddy was the greatest fire eater

that there ever was?

You know that he lit cigarettes for kings and princes,

with his hot throat, for heaven's sake.

Certainly better than this show biz bullshit.

Yes darling, but it, it does come out when you speak.

Oh, sorry.

[Mona scoffs] [knocking at door]

Oh, it's Mr. Katz, do you want him to come in, Hun?

[Mona] Oh of course. I always have time for my producer.

Hello, darling. Great performance!

Great performance.

Hello, Shirley. Hello, Peter. How's the new play coming?

Very well, Sam, I should have it finished

in just a couple of days.

Mona, have I got a girl outside for you,

that I interviewed for the job, for the secretary.

I've had a hell of a time.

It hasn't been very easy finding a girl

that wants to live in and give up her evenings.

Not only is she a great admirer of yours,

a good secretary,

but she's willing to live in

and come to the theater every night.

Mm, I think, I just think, that maybe

she'd be agreeable to come and work

for practically nothing if you like her.

Hm. How sweet, darling.

By all means, bring her in, bring her in.

-All right. -[scoffs]

[Mona] Now you kids stick around, please.

You know how I am judging character.

Yeah, come on in.

Alice, this is Miss Manning.

-Hello. How are you? -[Mona] Hello, darling.

And this is Shirley Miller and Peter Miller,

and that's Cora.

-Mm, go talk to them. -[Alice] Hello. How are you?

So nice to meet you.

I'm so happy to meet you, Mr. Miller.

Your plays have always thrilled me.

Well, thank you very much.

Isn't that wonderful. She even knew who you were.

Uh, yes darling, how nice.

Please sit down, sweetheart, and tell me all about yourself.

Thank you, Ms. Manning.

You can't imagine how thrilled I am even to meet you,

let alone be considered for a job as your secretary.

I've seen everything that you've done,

and I've seen this play at least 10 times.

You're absolutely marvelous.

Oh, I'm impressed. 10 times?

Darling, darling Cora, did you hear that? 10 times.

[Cora] Mm-hmm, mm, big deal.

[scoffs] Now, now be your sweet, angelic self, Cora,

for a change.

Now please darling, tell me all about yourself.

Sam tells me you have great skills.

Now, I'd like to know all about your background,

where you're from, where you've lived before.

Now, by the way sweetheart, how old are you?

23. I'm from Denver, Colorado.

I'm an orphan and was brought up in a home

and went to school in Denver.

I've always loved the theater,

and I studied drama in high school.

I was the lead in the senior play.

Shortly after I graduated,

I met a boy and we fell in love and got married.

He was on leave and had to go back to Vietnam.

So I went with him to San Francisco

so that we could be together before he had to leave.

After he left, I stayed in San Francisco

and took a secretarial course at a business school.

After a few months, the school found me a job

with an insurance company.

My husband wrote to me often.

That is, until the letters stopped coming.

Oh.

And then one day I received a telegram

from the government saying he'd been killed in action.

I've never been so unhappy in all my life.

But, I pulled through it somehow.

I stayed on my job for awhile before I moved to New York.

Before I left San Francisco, I saw you in a play.

When you were on tour with "Autumn Leaves,"

that's when I became such a fan of yours,

and was really the reason I moved to New York,

so that I could see you on the stage again.

[knocking at door]

Oh, it's Mike, Hun.

Hi, everybody.

How did the play go tonight?

Oh, same as ever, darling.

This is, this is Alice.

Alice, what was your last name, darling?

Barrington. Alice Barrington.

Oh yes. Now, now, Alice Barrington,

this is Mike Cassidy, my fiancé.

Now please darling, please be quiet.

Uh, dear Alice is applying for the secretarial position.

How do you do, Alice?

Please, don't let me interrupt.

Oh, yes. Now darling, please, please go on.

Well, when I came to New York, I began to look for a job.

It hasn't been easy, as I've had no local experience.

But I've kept trying

and I've had to live on a very small budget.

[Mona] Oh, Jesus.

I can just see the hound dogs snappin' at her ass.

Cora, how terrible.

Now apologize to Miss Barrington.

Sorry, I just got carried away.

-While I was looking for work,

I treated myself to seeing your play as often as I could.

[Alice chuckles] Of course, I was usually

in standing room only audience,

but I've loved every performance that I've seen.

I think you're just magnificent.

Anyway, when I saw Mr. Katz' advertisement in the newspaper

for a secretary to a star, I answered the ad.

And you can imagine my excitement

when I found out it was for you.

So, that's my story.

I'd just loved to have the job.

The salary and living conditions

would be more than satisfactory.

And I feel I could do a good job for you.

Beautiful! You're hired, darling.

Well, and I assume you can start right away?

-Yes indeed. Anytime you say. -Oh, fine, fine.

Oh, Sam will give you my address,

and you can bring your luggage around to my apartment

tomorrow about uh, oh,

well, say two o'clock.

Oh, Miss Manning, I can't tell you how happy I am.

Thank you so very much.

Oh surely, darling. Wonderful, wonderful.

-Goodbye all. -Goodnight Alice.

Goodnight everybody. See you later.

-Night, Sam. -Thank you, Sam.

-Goodbye, and thank you again. I'll see you tomorrow.

All right, darling.

What an absolutely divine girl.

Didn't you think so, Peter?

Yes, I did.

I think she's exactly what you've been looking for, Mona.

I think she'll be great for the job.

-[Mona] Yes. -Peter, we have to be going.

Mona dear, we'll talk to you tomorrow,

and good luck with your new secretary.

-Thank you, darling Shirley. -Goodnight, Mike.

-Goodnight. -Peter, sweetheart.

-Goodnight. -Goodnight.

And thank you darlings for sitting with me.

-All right. -Good Pete, we'll see you soon.

[door clicks shut]

Oh Cora, I'm glad that's over with.

Oh, I've got to get dressed.

Christ, I'm starved.

-Where we eating? -Well,

well I thought we'd go to Sardi's, or something.

Darling, I could eat a horse.

Yeah?

Which end?

None of your foul talk, Cora.

Oh, I thought you were just dreadful to that sweet girl.

You should be ashamed.

Well you want my thoughts on it, she's an F-F.

That's fucking phony.

[Mona scoffs]

Course if you want my thoughts on it,

and I'm sure that you don't.

Oh, you're just dreadful, Cora.

She's the sweetest, most

down-to-earth girl I've ever met.

-[Cora sighs] -The trouble with you,

is you don't know how to judge character.

[scoffs] Come Mike, darling, let's go, sweetheart.

But I will see you at the apartment,

tomorrow darling?

[Mona gasps dramatically]

Goodnight, Cora.

Stay off the streets tonight.

Oh, you bastard.

Goodnight to both of ya.

Oh, what a delightful evening darling, wasn't it?

It was just heaven.

Oh my god.

And finding a secretary like that was just beautiful.

She's gonna work out divine.

She's the sweetest little thing in the world.

Oh, that Cora doesn't know what she's talking about.

Oh, and running into Madison Devine,

that was the only dull part of the goddamn evening.

There she was, that old closet queen,

sitting across from me, sobbing.

You know, darling, she's expecting us to break up

any moment now.

We'll surprise him. We'll stay together forever.

Oh my god.

They're either too young, or too old.

Oh, who would want to sing something like that,

horrible song.

Darling, what are you doing in there?

[Mike] I'm just outta the shower,

and I'm blowing my hair.

Blowing your what?

Well save some for me, sweetheart.

[Mike] I'll be through in a minute.

-Good.

Oh dear.

[Mona humming]

[chuckles] Oh my god.

What a beautiful evening, oh.

This goddamn thing. Eskimos sent it to me.

Have fans all over the world.

[chuckles] Darling, oh how divine.

Uh, must've been the booze tonight.

You're going to be raped, darling.

Hey, I'm all yours tonight.

We haven't balled in three days.

Oh, heaven.

Looking gorgeous tonight, darling.

Oh Mike, you're such a sweetheart.

[Mona moans]

[Mike moans]

Goddamn, darling.

Oh I miss this time in bed.

[uplifting orchestral music]

[Mike moans]

[bold orchestral music]

[Mike moans]

Oh hi, gorgeous. How are you feeling today?

Oh, just fine, darling.

And how's my favorite bodyguard?

Oh, likewise, I'm sure.

I would've gotten the mail for you

but the J Edgar Hoover of the mailbox picked it up

-before I had a chance. -Good morning, Miss Manning.

You look ravishing this morning. How are you?

Oh, just super, darling. What's in the mail?

Oh, nothing I can't take care of.

Just a couple of bills and a few letters

I will answer for you.

[telephone ringing]

Good morning.

Oh, Mr. Devine, how are you?

Yes. Mm-hmm.

Oh I'm sure she can see you this afternoon.

All right, I'll tell her.

Thank you very much. Goodbye.

Last night, Mr. Miller gave me a few scenes

from his new play,

and I've been reading it this morning.

I think you would be just marvelous in the lead.

And I do hope you decide to take it.

Oh well, from what Peter says, darling,

the part calls for a much younger, younger girl.

And I, don't know if I could be convincing enough, darling.

Oh, Miss Manning, you could look 23 if you wanted to.

I say you would be just perfect for the part.

Let me see that script.

Lovely title.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, let me see here.

Darling, you're always talking about age and horoscopes.

What does either of them matter?

And what do they have to do with our marriage?

So you're nearly 50? Hmm.

There are a lot of couples get along just famously

with age differences more than ours.

Oh darling, you're always talking.

What a dope.

Mm, did you see that snood?

Should've covered her face as well as everything else.

She should have a body stocking that covers her whole body

for heaven's sake.

Mm, I never believed in horoscopes.

And I'm a Taurus.

Like my father.

Had bad characteristics like a bull.

Hm. I don't think I'm that way at all.

And I would never want to be domineering.

And if we were married,

and if we were married, you would always be the leader

of our family, hmm.

So let's forget about the stars, darling.

Even though I'm years younger than you,

I know we could be happy.

Oh no, dear god, that's a, that's a crappy line.

I must speak to Peter about it.

Miss Manning, you have the most beautiful walk.

Would you be offended if I, if I learned it?

Well how sweet of you, darling Alice.

Of course I wouldn't be offended.

It just sort of comes natural to me.

Now, now you follow me, and every move I make.

Now we'll go around the room here, sweetheart.

Here we go.

Did you like that?

Here, now, when I just read that line,

you would make a turn like this, and move this gesture like this,

with my, with my hands and my feet, darling.

Now follow me.

Now, take this line from, there we go.

Oh I would never be domineering.

And if we were married, darling,

you would always be the leader in our family.

Now darling Alice, you try it.

I would never be domineering.

And if we were married, you would always be the leader

in our family.

Why, Alice, that's, that's perfect.

I never knew you had such talent. My god.

And you didn't even, you didn't even use the script.

I've always been good at memorizing things, Miss Manning.

And since I've been reading these scenes,

I think I could recite almost all of them.

Oh, that's fantastic, darling.

Now maybe, maybe in a few years,

you might even get a part in my, in my play.

Well in one of the plays that I'm going to do,

oh, maybe in the next five years.

How would you like that?

Oh, Miss Manning, if that could ever be possible,

I'd just love it,

and you're so wonderful to even consider it.

Oh, you stick with me darling.

And then you'll be wearing diamonds in your nail.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I hope I'm not interrupting anything.

I've just been working out.

Oh, not at all, darling.

Mm, I was just reading part of Peter's new play.

-[Alice] Hello, Mike. -Hi Alice. How are you?

Now let's see, where was I?

And I'd, and I'd never--

You're looking great today.

I've been noticing you for awhile.

Looks better all the time.

Well, thank you. I've been noticing you too.

Tell me, are you really in love with Miss Manning?

Well [chuckles], I'd love to make it with you.

-Does that answer your question? -Yes, it certainly does.

And the feeling is mutual.

But we have to wait for the right opportunity.

I'll be looking forward to it.

[Mona] And I would never want to be domineering.

Mona, I have to take my shower now.

Oh. All right darling, go ahead, sweetheart.

And I'll be up later to give you a rubdown.

[doorbell rings]

People coming here all the time, for heaven's sake.

Just cool it. Do you mind?

-[Mona] Really, Cora. -Oh, hello. How are you?

Oh it's good to see you. Darling, look who's here.

Hello, all of you.

Peter and I were just on our way to the publishers

and thought we'd stop by.

I hope you don't mind us barging in.

Well of course not, Peter darling.

By the way, Peter, Peter, Peter, about your new script.

I have a few suggestions to make.

Oh, Cora, make them a drink, won't you?

Oh, sure. What'll you have, Peter?

-Nothing. We just had breakfast. -Nothing?

-[Cora] Ah. -No thank you, dear.

Oh, by the way, Miss Manning, Madison Devine called earlier

and said he would like to drop by.

I told him he would be welcomed.

How nice.

I wonder what the hell he wants.

[doorbell rings]

Mm, darling. I believe that's Madison at the door.

Please, please.

Oh my dear Madison, so good to see you.

It is Madison, darling.

Well, Madison Devine, how nice, darling.

Do you know everyone here?

-Oh hello, Shirley, Peter. -Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Oh ah, do you know Alice Barrington,

my secretary, sweetheart?

Well, I don't think I've met your new secretary,

though I have heard about her.

Oh, Alice, Alice Barrington, this is Madison Devine,

the great New York columnist.

Pleased to meet you, Mr. Devine.

I read your column in "The Times" every day.

Well thank you very much.

Mona's taste in secretaries has certainly improved.

[laughs] You dirty old man, Madison.

Now she's a sweet, innocent child.

Besides, I think she's the only one in New York City

that still knows how to blush.

I do hope that you don't mind my dropping by,

but I want to do an article on uh, Peter's new play.

And I thought I could talk to both of you about it.

Well, of course, darling. Please sit down.

-Thank you. -Mm-hmm.

Alice, how do you like your new job by now?

Oh, Mrs. Miller,

It has to be the greatest job I've ever had.

Miss Manning is exactly as I had imagined.

I couldn't be happier.

Isn't that wonderful?

And I know Mona's very pleased with you too.

I'm so glad everything's working out.

Mrs. Miller,

there is something I'd like to speak to you about.

Could we go into the other room?

Of course, dear.

Mrs. Miller, I do hope you won't think I'm too forward,

but I have a great favor to ask of you.

Whatever it is Alice, I'll be glad to do it.

You know, I have had some acting experience,

and I would just love to become Miss Manning's understudy.

You know the girl who is doing it now is pregnant and,

and she'll be leaving the cast tomorrow.

Miss Manning never misses a performance,

so it wouldn't be such a big deal.

And I am at the theater every night, anyway.

I, I thought perhaps you could speak to Sam Katz and,

and put in a good word for me.

That's a wonderful idea, Alice.

And I can't see any reason for Sam not liking it.

Of course dear, I'll speak to him this afternoon.

Oh, Mrs. Miller, you're so wonderful.

I knew you would help if I asked.

Thank you so very much.

I'm glad to do it, dear.

And just think, maybe someday you'll be famous.

[audience applauding]

[quiet sniffling]

Oh.

[quiet sniffling]

Dear, dear Alice, you're crying.

Oh, Miss Manning, I always cry

when you do that last scene.

It's so beautiful.

Oh, such a sweet child.

You have to be my greatest fan, darling.

My greatest, greatest fan.

Did you slay 'em again?

Oh, laid 'em in the aisles, darling.

Mm, Cora.

Cora, darling, be a darling, darling pet,

and make me a drink, please.

[Cora] Sure.

Mm, there we go.

Oh, darling. Oh what a performance tonight.

Sitting in the aisles.

[Alice] I'll take it to the wardrobe department.

Oh, you don't have to do that, darling.

Oh, I don't mind. I'll be right back.

Oh.

You know that girl's gonna get her ass in a sling.

Hasn't she ever heard of the union?

Would you let the wardrobe pick it up?

Oh. You know, you're right Cora.

I should've thought of that.

Morning, sexy. Is Mona still sleeping?

Yes, I think she has a slight hangover.

Were the two of you up late?

Yeah, we were out with the Millers last night.

I think she had a couple too many.

I guess you know I'm ready whenever you are.

I believe you, baby.

We'll make the scene sometime.

Wow.

You just gave me a birthday present.

-Really? Is it today? -Tomorrow.

How wonderful. We must have a party for you.

Tomorrow's Sunday, so everyone should be available.

Who would you like?

Here.

You be my guest, invite who you'd like.

Well, I have to call the caterer,

and then I can call some of these numbers.

We'll have a wonderful party for you.

[gentle uplifting orchestral music]

[paper rustling]

Mm.

Mm. Oh my god, darling, isn't it awfully early?

I had to thank you for the birthday present.

It's beautiful.

Birthday pres, present? What, really?

What present darling?

The present? My birthday present?

Your birth, oh your birthday.

Of course, darling, your birthday.

[Mona groaning]

God.

Oh, incidentally, Alice has planned a party for tonight.

A party?

Really? Why darling, that'll be wonderful.

Your back, your back is so gorgeous.

It's just beautiful.

Oh, don't touch your back with that. Be you, Hun.

You are so beautiful just by yourself.

You're exquisite.

-Where the goddamn hell is Mike?

Oh, he's downstairs with Pearl Mesta

getting ready for the party.

Oh.

Well how 'bout that, Cora?

Just, just leave it bare. Let them see you as you are.

I don't know. Should I?

Oh Hun, it's just, you're just too perfect.

You're absolutely perfect.

[scoffs]

Well, at least I have darling Mike's ring on.

Mm-hmm.

Well hurry up and get finished

with what you were doing back there.

-All right. -Is it all zipped up?

It's all zipped up and it's all just right.

And you look absolutely gorgeous.

Well I better get down and help them.

Oh.

[Mona sighs]

I'm all right.

-Having fun. -You are so perfect.

This, yes, this is just perfect,

and I love that, it's just--

All right.

[gentle music]

Well, you're in back of Sunnybrook Farm, in heat.

Are you rehearsing a new play, darling?

How embarrassing.

You caught me giving Mike a kiss for his birthday.

Well, I know it's his birthday.

Well I thought we were going to have a party.

Let's get started on this thing.

What can I do now? Let's get started.

-Hello-- -Mona, how are you, darling?

I'm fine, sweetheart.

Happy birthday, Mike.

-Thank you. -Good evening.

-Hello, Peter. -Alice, how are you, dear?

-Hello, Mona. -Happy birthday.

-Thank you, Peter. -Darling, how are ya?

I'm good. Hello, darling.

Happy birthday there, Mike.

-Thank you. -How are ya?

-Hello, Alice. -Oh hi, sweetie.

Mona, darling, how are you?

-Oh, happy birthday, Mike. -Thank you.

Oh, you were wonderful in that new play, darling.

-Oh, thank you, darling. -Darling, you're dancing

-better than ever. -Lovely to see you.

You look gorgeous.

-Thank you. -Love that style.

-Hi. Happy birthday. -Hi. How are ya?

-Happy birthday, Mike. -Thank you.

-Oh my god, there's Madison.

Mike, and who in the hell is with her?

Oh my god.

Dear Madison, what is it?

-It has to be from California. -Hello, everybody.

This is Marilyn. She is from California.

But she's gonna make a big name on Broadway.

-Hello darling. -Oh Miss Manning,

Broadway's biggest thespian.

Ah, thank you, darling.

This is Mike. It's his birthday, sweetheart.

-Hello. How do you do? -Hi, Mike. Happy birthday.

-What's your name, honey? -Happy birthday, Mike.

-Alice. -Thanks, man.

-Oh, Alice. -[Mona] Oh yes, darling.

-Hello, Alice. How are you? -Oh, Mike, you shouldn't.

Well, that's Sam Katz over there on the couch.

Now get your boobs fluffed up

and get over there and get to work.

-Oh my god, darling, hello. -How are you?

Really Michael, when are you gonna call me again?

Yes, when are we going to get together for a gang bang?

By the way, have you seen John Adams in his new play?

Yes, I did, and I thought he was simply divine.

Well I think he's wonderful, but my god, he's colored.

Drinks?

I'm sorry. I'll have a mint julep, honey.

You would.

Isn't this a wonderful party for Mike?

May I refresh your drink, Miss Manning?

Stop acting as if I was a goddamn queen mother.

Get me another martini.

[indistinct chatter]

You forgot the goddamn olive.

[relaxed piano music]

[guests chattering]

Here, Miss Prissy.

[relaxed piano music]

Congratulations, Alice.

I understand you've acquired the job as Mona's understudy.

I hope it doesn't make you pregnant too.

Oh, Mr. Devine, I'm more careful than that.

Has anyone ever told you, you're a very handsome man?

Not for a long time, my dear, but I do enjoy hearing it,

and especially from someone as lovely as you.

[upbeat piano music] [guest chattering]

Mona darling, wait a minute.

Come on.

[indistinct dialogue]

Mona darling, this girl, I promised to make a star.

I promised to give her an audition.

-What do you think of her? -Oh, she's gorgeous, darling.

Well, I'll tell you what, and I'll even read with her.

How would you like that, sweetheart?

Wow, did you hear that?

Mona Manning is gonna read with ya.

Yes darling, and I think it'd be awfully nice.

When do you want to set it up, Sam?

Say uh, tomorrow at three o'clock.

Fine, I'll meet you at the theater.

Oh, Miss Manning, I think that's heavenly.

Thank you very much.

See ya, darling. Come on, sweetie.

Where is that Mona?

It's four o'clock. She hasn't even bothered to call.

You should know Mona by now.

She probably forgot all about it.

She was pretty snockered last night.

Well, why not have Alice read?

After all, she is the understudy.

That's a good idea. Alice, would you mind?

Of course not. I'd love to do it.

What part would you like us to do?

Just a minute, I'll find a good one.

Let's take the second scene in the third act.

That's where the two of you are alone together on the stage.

We've got it. Are you ready?

Ready.

What am I to say?

What a bother I have cherished.

I've lived in this plantation a lifetime.

Imprisoned. Guarded by a man I've always hated.

And now, he's so fearful for the day he dies.

Perhaps then I could laugh aloud.

But why haven't you separated?

Twice we've tried to break off our engagements,

and since then not a day has passed

in which we haven't tried to separate.

But we are welded together.

We can't escape.

Now, only death can separate us.

We both know it.

So we wait for the great savior to make that decision.

Why are you so alone?

Because he has isolated me.

First, he uprooted all my brothers

and sisters from the house.

And after that, all my friends.

But what about his relatives?

Did you uproot them?

Yeah, for they were robbing me of my life,

and attacked me of my name and good honor.

In the end,

you were my only contact

with the world and other human beings.

You have stood through me through thick or thin.

You did, Stella.

Stella Bostouir

has been my only contact with the outside world.

You're a true friend, Charlotte.

Now hush, hush.

You know how I feel about,

about, I think I'm going to be sick.

-[Marilyn retching] -Oh my god.

Sorry old boy, but you've done a great thing

by arranging all of this.

Alice Barrington is gonna be a star that shakes Broadway.

Alice, how did you memorize all the lines?

Mr. Katz, I know every line of this play.

I could play anyone's role.

Well, here I am, darlings.

I hope I'm not too late.

I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long.

We've had the audition, it's all over.

And Marilyn concluded by becoming violently ill.

Well who read for her?

Why uh, Alice, your understudy.

Alice? Since when is Alice my understudy?

Oh, I thought you knew.

Ever since the other one became pregnant and left.

No, I didn't.

Sam, you never told me.

You're my producer, you didn't tell me a thing.

I'm sorry, Mona. You know you never miss a performance.

I didn't think you'd care.

Of course I care.

Well, what happened?

Alice was superb.

-[Mona scoffs] -She read the lines

exactly as Peter had written them.

And believe me,

she added fire and music to the play.

Well, she did, did she?

Well, princess fire and music can go fuck herself

along with the rest of you.

Poor Mona, she never could take competition.

She'll be all right by tonight.

'Cause word goes around,

she still gives the best head in town.

Mm. Listen, I'm late for an appointment.

Thank you, Alice, for everything.

You'll be hearing from me.

Madison, can you give me a lift?

Why, sure thing.

Marilyn, are you over your sickness?

Come on, we're leaving.

-Goodbye, Peter. -Goodbye, Alice.

-Goodbye. -See ya, Peter.

You all right, honey?

Alice, I'm so sorry the way that Mona spoke to you.

I hope you won't let it upset you.

I've known Mona for many years.

She gets over these things very quickly.

Oh, I feel so terrible.

I didn't mean for anything like this to happen.

What can I do?

Absolutely nothing.

Go on as if nothing has happened.

You're going to make it, you're going to be a great actress.

Mr. Miller, everyone has been so wonderful to me.

How can I ever repay you?

Why don't we go into the dressing room?

[gentle strings music]

You know, the greatest thing that could ever happen to me

would be able to do the play one night.

You don't think that would happen?

-Truthfully, I doubt it very much.

Mona has never missed a performance.

And after today, I doubt very much that she ever will.

You don't think you could arrange it some way, do you?

Well seeing you put it that way.

Saturday evening after the performance,

we leave for the mountains,

and we're not going to be returning until Monday.

I could have car trouble,

which means that we wouldn't get back on time.

I knew you would think of something.

I'd do anything for a chance like that.

[upbeat strings music]

[upbeat jazz music]

I'll go load the car.

I'll be right back.

[upbeat jazz music]

[car engine stalling]

[upbeat jazz music]

Something is wrong with the car, it won't start.

What do you mean it won't start?

Not the gas, it's something else.

I'll have to go after help.

But Peter, the garage is three miles down the road.

I know. And they don't have a fucking phone.

-I'll have to walk. -You've got to be kidding.

Well, just don't stand there, do something,

or I'll be late for the theater.

Oh Christ, I wish Mike were here.

He could fix the goddamn thing.

Well, I'm off.

I'll be back as soon as I get help.

-[Mona scoffs] -Don't get upset, Mona.

You can't expect Mike to be here with us

if his mother's in town.

Anyway, we'll get you back to the theater on time.

Don't worry.

Shit, shit, shit. Oh, oh.

[slow somber piano music]

[gentle orchestral music]

What's happening? Where's Mona?

She's away for a couple of hours.

It's Cora's day off.

We're alone in the house.

-What are we waiting for? -Just a minute.

I, I have something to show you.

[paper rustling]

"Broadway Today" by Madison Devine.

"Last night something wonderful happened

in our world of show biz.

For the first time in her career,

Mona Manning missed a performance.

This was definitely not the wonderful part of this story.

We all know that Mona Manning is the greatest actress

to hit Broadway in many years,

and it was an unfortunate that her party encountered

car trouble during a weekend trip to the mountains.

The wonderful bit lies in the fact that her understudy,

Alice Barrington, took over the role.

Of course, a few people adjourned to the box office

for a refund as soon as the announcement was made.

For those who remained,

Miss Barrington gave a letter-perfect performance

that received a standing ovation.

This reviewer and critic could see no equal

to the potential of this fine performer who gave

"Southern Comfort" the fire and music the play deserved."

[chuckles] Congratulations, you've hit the jackpot.

Now let's get off your clothes.

[gentle orchestral music]

You got it.

[gentle orchestral music]

[dramatic music]

[paper slaps]

-How dare you. You bastards.

In my bed, fucking, screwing.

You may be screwing in my bed,

but I'm the one that got fucked, got fucked.

Now I know what that car trouble was about.

It was planned. I know it was planned.

And how, how come the critics were there to review this?

And how in the first place did you get the goddamn job

as my understudy?

Oh, I have been screwed a lotta times in my life,

but this is the finish, this is the end.

Now I want both of you to get out of my house.

Get out! Get out!

[dramatic orchestral music]

Oh!

Oh!

[dramatic orchestral music]

Oh, damn them.

Oh, goddammit.

[suspenseful orchestral music]

Son of a bitch.

[suspenseful orchestral music]

Oh Shirley, Shirley darling, oh I've got problems.

No, goddammit, I can't tell you on the phone.

I'll be at Ann Miller's. Yes, meet me there.

And bring Peter too. [sighs]

Yes, yes I'm leaving right now. Yes.

[phone bangs]

[suspenseful orchestral music]

[Mona sighing]

Sons of bitches.

[sighs] Oh!

[door slams shut]

[tires squealing]

[lively dance music]

[tap shoes clicking]

Hello, Miss Manning, I read the review in the paper--

Oh, fuck those reviews.

Chad darling, make me a triple.

[lively dance music]

We've read it, Mona.

And Peter and I know how you feel.

Oh!

I suppose this means war?

Oh, total.

Oh, thank you, darling.

She's really angry.

Mm, sweetheart, bring me another one.

Oh, make it a round for all of us, sweetheart.

And that isn't all.

I always considered the bedroom was a private sanctuary.

But by god, no darling, that isn't.

Oh god. You know what this morning, darling?

I went up to "The New Yorker" magazine for our interview,

and goddamn what a bore, oh what a bore that was.

Anyway, I got through early,

and I went home, and in my bed sweetheart,

was princess fuck fire and music.

And guess who she was with?

Mike.

Oh. Anyway, oh, here you are darling, thank you.

Anyway, there they were so entwined,

so entwined I couldn't tell one from another.

Needless to say, I ordered 'em all out of the house.

Mona, how terrible.

Oh, can you imagine the balls on that bitch?

Oh, I've been screwed before, but never like this.

And how, and how in the hell,

did the critics know to review her?

Oh my god, I've gotta get to the bottom of this.

There's something rotten going on

and I'm going to get to the bottom of it.

I wonder too, how the critics got wind of it.

But if Alice planned this,

surely she couldn't have done it alone.

There's only one person I could think of

that could help her see it through.

[Both] Madison Devine.

But surely Madison wouldn't be a party

to an actress missing a performance.

I can expect anything out of that, that feminist gossip.

And I know for goddamn certain,

that car trouble in the mountain was planned.

We should've all listened to Cora.

At least she saw through that innocent little whore.

Oh my god, what am I gonna do now?

Well you've always managed before, Mona,

and I'm sure you'll see this through too.

Oh.

All we can do now is wait,

or at least accept what's happened and learn from it.

Someday, we'll all look back on this and laugh.

Thank god we can still do that.

Oh, my god, I suppose you're right.

[classic jazz music]

I can't believe you're not nervous.

Boston is such a cold town for an opening.

Will you be able to rest a while before your performance?

Oh, I feel marvelous. I've never felt better.

And I'm not nervous.

Boston doesn't scare me.

The rehearsals went very well,

and tonight, I shall be magnificent.

Besides, Peter will be here,

and I'll only be thinking of him.

Peter! What does Peter got to do with it?

I'm going to marry Peter.

He's going to leave Shirley.

Hm, that ought to warp a few people.

You must be kidding, Alice Barrington.

You're not breaking up a happy marriage,

and you're not marrying Peter Miller,

but you are getting married.

I've done a little checking on your story

about your poor dead husband who was killed in Vietnam,

and how you worked and slaved

and finally made it to New York.

You were in San Francisco all right,

but you weren't waiting for any poor soldier boy.

You were a hooker at the St. Francis Hotel.

And I understand a pretty good one too.

I know all about how you talked Shirley

into getting you the job as Mona's understudy,

and how you talked Peter, or probably screwed Peter,

into pulling that breakdown scene in the mountains.

You are rotten to the core, Alice Barrington,

and God knows why I would want you.

But I need someone who can be famous,

and I can give you all it takes.

So if you have any aspirations

about becoming a great star on Broadway,

you'll do as I say.

Otherwise, I'll expose the whole sorted mess,

and you'll amount to absolutely nothing.

Now my pet, take your choice.

[Alice crying]

No, no, no.

Whatever, you bastard.

If you knew all that, why would you want me anyway?

I told you my dear, I need a front runner.

That's not much of a choice,

but then again, I'm not a man.

But I guess you win.

I am going to be famous.

I'm going to be a star, a big, big star.

That's better, my sweet.

-[Alice crying] -Now dry your eyes,

and get a little rest for your debut.

I'll call you at six.

I can't make it. I can't go on tonight.

[Madison] You'll go on,

and you'll give an unforgettable performance.

[Alice crying]

[door clicks shut]

[audience applauding]

Thank you members of the board, for voting for me.

And thank you Broadway for accepting me

and awarding me this honor.

Believe me,

this accomplishment was not entirely my own.

I had so much help and encouragement

from my friends here in New York.

My producer, Sam Katz,

had the confidence in me to give me the chance

of becoming an understudy,

and later the leading role, which has won this award.

Peter Miller,

one of the greatest playwrights of all time,

wrote a beautiful play, which gave me the opportunity

of using the talent I found I have.

Shirley Miller has been a real friend.

She's the best friend a girl ever had.

And she greatly encouraged me when I thought

I would never make the grade.

My dearest friend and idle,

Mona Manning,

gave me the experience I needed to reach this pinnacle.

And I am more than grateful to this generous

and talented woman,

and to all the little people

who helped and were kind to me,

thank you all very, very much.

Thank you, from every fiber of my being.

[audience applauding]

-Congratulations my dear. -Thank you.

-Best of luck, darling. -Thank you very much.

-Congratulations. -Thank you.

-Good show, darling. -Thank you.

-It's beautiful. -Thank you very much.

-Congratulations. -Thank you.

-Congratulations, Alice. -Thank you.

-Congratulations, Alice. -Thank you.

Congratulations Alice, I'm proud from you.

-Gee, nice going, honey. -Thank you.

Congratulations, Alice.

Congratulations, Alice.

-Thank you. -You deserve it.

Good luck, Hun, you'll need it.

You certainly have the guts for it.

Congratulations, Alice.

You could always shove that award where your heart is.

Well, you did it, congratulations.

Are you ready to leave for Sam's party?

I'm not going to any party.

Well why not? It's being given in your honor.

You're the social butterfly in this family, you go.

I'm going home.

Very well, have it your way, princess.

Come along, I'll drop you in the cab.

-[glass thuds] -Who are you?

I'm so sorry I frightened you.

My name is Bobby Vale,

and I slipped in while the maid was gone.

Please forgive me,

but this is the only way I could talk to you.

I admire you so much.

You're crazy. I'm going to call the police.

Please don't, Miss Barrington. I just had to meet you.

I'm president of the Alice Barrington

Fan Club at Brooklyn High School.

We just love you, Miss Barrington,

and I had to meet you somehow.

[phone receiver clicking]

I've never heard of such a thing.

You could be put in jail for things like this.

How old are you?

I'm 17.

Please don't be upset, Miss Barrington.

I've been waiting hours to see you,

and I'd hoped I could do something for you.

May I fix you a drink or something?

Well, you certainly have your nerve.

Yes, I, I could use a drink after this.

Fix me a scotch and water.

Very strong.

[liquid pouring]

I was so happy to hear you won the Tony Award.

So beautiful.

Our club will be thrilled.

Well, thank you very much.

I suppose you wanna be on the stage someday too.

Oh yes. I'm studying drama in school.

I'd just love to be on the stage someday.

Well believe me, it's not what it's cracked up to be.

On the surface, it's all tinsel and glitter,

but I am here to tell you it can tear your guts out.

You age very fast.

Miss Barrington, you'll never grow old.

You'll always be beautiful and talented,

and you'll never change.

[dogs barking]

Well, I hope you're right.

Now listen,

I've had it for tonight, I'm going to bed.

It's too late for you to go back to Brooklyn tonight,

sleep on the couch.

And let yourself out in the morning.

Miss Barrington, you're just as wonderful

as I thought you'd be.

Thank you so much.

And thanks for not calling the police.

Oh, by the way, my husband will be in later.

If you like him, you can have him.

Thank you.

[daunting orchestral music]

[music swells]

♪ About Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ Forgive a little touch Of malice ♪

♪ For Alice learned Her lesson fast ♪

♪ You've got to be tough ♪

♪ If you want to last ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ The news is out about Alice ♪

♪ They say our little game Is callous ♪

♪ But Alice charms you when she touches you ♪

♪ Beware of that ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ Oh, all about Alice ♪

♪ All about Alice ♪

♪ Oh, oh, all about Alice ♪