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1
00:00:04,935 --> 00:00:08,663
♪ [THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:35,276 --> 00:00:36,864
What do you think
of this for a film?
3
00:00:36,864 --> 00:00:38,659
It's about wildlife living
4
00:00:38,659 --> 00:00:41,179
in the city that has
no business being there.
5
00:00:41,179 --> 00:00:43,215
Like the falcons that live
in the Chrysler Building?
6
00:00:43,871 --> 00:00:44,872
And?
7
00:00:45,700 --> 00:00:47,840
Well, they're falcons,
8
00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:49,601
and they're
in the Chrysler Building.
9
00:00:49,601 --> 00:00:50,740
Yeah?
10
00:00:51,534 --> 00:00:52,535
And?
11
00:00:53,398 --> 00:00:55,986
They're falcons, right?
Oh, forget it, forget it.
12
00:00:56,435 --> 00:00:58,092
I thought you wanted
something never done
13
00:00:58,092 --> 00:00:59,335
by the Explorer Channel.
14
00:00:59,335 --> 00:01:01,026
-They did that?
-Well...
15
00:01:01,026 --> 00:01:04,098
-How about dolphin puppies?
-You'll think of something.
16
00:01:04,098 --> 00:01:07,584
I'd better, 'cause I'm zero
for nine this week
17
00:01:07,584 --> 00:01:10,794
and everybody in the office,
they're rooting for me to fail.
18
00:01:10,794 --> 00:01:12,693
They're like vultures there.
19
00:01:13,590 --> 00:01:15,075
Hey, vulture puppies?
20
00:01:15,592 --> 00:01:17,077
We have nothing to eat.
21
00:01:17,836 --> 00:01:19,700
-Want some banana?
-Is it still good?
22
00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:21,564
-No.
-[TELEPHONE RINGING]
23
00:01:22,565 --> 00:01:24,153
Hello. Hiya, Fran.
24
00:01:24,946 --> 00:01:26,983
Okay, hang on.
Your meeting's moved up.
25
00:01:26,983 --> 00:01:28,502
You gotta be there
in half an hour.
26
00:01:28,502 --> 00:01:30,435
How can I be there
in half an hour?
27
00:01:30,435 --> 00:01:32,195
How can she be there
in half an hour?
28
00:01:32,644 --> 00:01:34,128
-He's the boss.
-I don't care.
29
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:35,819
It's rude to change
appointments.
30
00:01:35,819 --> 00:01:37,718
I don't care. It's rude
to change appointments.
31
00:01:38,615 --> 00:01:41,239
-Grow up.
-I have. He should grow up.
32
00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,690
-She is grown up--
-All right, give me the phone.
33
00:01:44,690 --> 00:01:46,175
I thought I was doing
a good job.
34
00:01:46,175 --> 00:01:47,417
I'll be there.
35
00:01:47,417 --> 00:01:51,490
Here is how I'm gonna find
an idea for my film.
36
00:01:51,490 --> 00:01:54,666
I am gonna do
a very exciting film on...
37
00:01:56,495 --> 00:01:57,945
crop fungus.
38
00:01:58,842 --> 00:02:00,706
I'm glad you didn't
finish this yogurt.
39
00:02:00,706 --> 00:02:02,846
-Who takes care of you?
-You do.
40
00:02:02,846 --> 00:02:06,678
Here we go. A terrific Explorer
Channel type of film on...
41
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,544
a guy with no teeth
holding a pig.
42
00:02:12,856 --> 00:02:14,099
What is the date, today?
43
00:02:14,099 --> 00:02:15,687
-Fourteenth.
-Oh, my god.
44
00:02:18,172 --> 00:02:19,380
Look at this.
45
00:02:19,449 --> 00:02:23,453
"Yoko Ono announces she's doing
a series of film happenings."
46
00:02:23,453 --> 00:02:24,661
Well, there you go.
47
00:02:24,661 --> 00:02:26,870
-What?
-Do that. You know Yoko.
48
00:02:27,768 --> 00:02:30,391
-I don't know her.
-She liked that film you made.
49
00:02:30,391 --> 00:02:33,187
-That was two years ago.
-I think it's a good idea.
50
00:02:33,601 --> 00:02:35,016
-What, a Yoko film?
-Yes.
51
00:02:35,672 --> 00:02:37,743
-For the Explorer Channel?
-It's different.
52
00:02:38,296 --> 00:02:40,539
If it was Yoko
wrestling a cougar...
53
00:02:41,885 --> 00:02:44,060
-Fine.
-Or Yoko tagging a wildebeest.
54
00:02:44,060 --> 00:02:46,787
Fine. Mock me.
I'm trying to help you.
55
00:02:46,787 --> 00:02:49,410
You're wonderful. It's just not
a good idea. But I love you.
56
00:02:49,410 --> 00:02:51,343
Is there nutrition
in Cracker Jacks?
57
00:02:51,343 --> 00:02:52,689
Yes, and a little toy.
58
00:03:00,041 --> 00:03:01,181
So, uh...
59
00:03:02,734 --> 00:03:05,599
The falcons live
in the Chrysler Building, right?
60
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,602
And they think the gargoyles
are their friends.
61
00:03:10,086 --> 00:03:11,363
Uh-huh.
62
00:03:12,295 --> 00:03:13,331
And like that.
63
00:03:14,642 --> 00:03:16,057
Interesting. What else?
64
00:03:16,057 --> 00:03:18,577
I thought something about
white-water rafting.
65
00:03:18,577 --> 00:03:20,476
-Been done.
-But with each different season.
66
00:03:20,476 --> 00:03:22,650
-Been done!
-Okay. Um...
67
00:03:23,893 --> 00:03:25,791
"A zoo." Something with a zoo.
68
00:03:27,793 --> 00:03:29,450
-I can't read my own writing.
-Paul...
69
00:03:29,450 --> 00:03:31,245
Have vulture puppies been done?
70
00:03:31,245 --> 00:03:32,936
Let's try this tomorrow.
71
00:03:32,936 --> 00:03:34,593
I'm sure we'll
think of something.
72
00:03:34,593 --> 00:03:37,665
Um... let me just throw
an idea at you.
73
00:03:37,665 --> 00:03:40,944
Yoko Ono is doing a series
of film happenings.
74
00:03:40,944 --> 00:03:42,981
-Yoko?
-Yeah.
75
00:03:42,981 --> 00:03:44,914
Yoko Ono
on the Explorer Channel?
76
00:03:44,914 --> 00:03:47,054
[ALL LAUGH]
77
00:03:47,054 --> 00:03:49,159
I know it's not the kind
of thing you do--
78
00:03:49,159 --> 00:03:50,368
I love it.
79
00:03:51,541 --> 00:03:53,302
-Really?
-It's different.
80
00:03:53,302 --> 00:03:55,752
That's what I thought.
"This is different."
81
00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:58,928
Great idea. I like it a lot.
What do you think?
82
00:03:58,928 --> 00:04:01,068
-Love it.
-Great, wonderful.
83
00:04:01,068 --> 00:04:04,002
Great. I was kidding
about the Chrysler Building!
84
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,212
And your two flunkies,
you can... slap in the head.
85
00:04:13,529 --> 00:04:14,875
-Hey.
-JAMIE: Hey.
86
00:04:14,875 --> 00:04:17,843
Here's a little interesting
piece of news for you.
87
00:04:17,843 --> 00:04:18,844
Guess who...
88
00:04:19,362 --> 00:04:21,399
-Chocolate pudding?
-Guess who what?
89
00:04:21,399 --> 00:04:23,677
Guess who is filming
the Yoko Ono thing.
90
00:04:24,125 --> 00:04:25,989
You pitched them my Yoko idea?
91
00:04:26,542 --> 00:04:28,440
Well... your idea. I...
92
00:04:29,130 --> 00:04:31,961
I worked out a whole thing,
with notes and thoughts.
93
00:04:31,961 --> 00:04:34,791
I knocked them
for a big, loopy loop.
94
00:04:34,791 --> 00:04:37,484
Well, with my idea,
but that's great!
95
00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:40,418
Well, they loved it.
Actually, Allison did.
96
00:04:40,418 --> 00:04:43,179
The rest can give me
a kiss on the ass area.
97
00:04:43,835 --> 00:04:46,147
Well, listen,
they loved our Yoko idea.
98
00:04:46,147 --> 00:04:48,736
-Know what else?
-Our Yoko idea?
99
00:04:48,736 --> 00:04:50,531
You, me, ours...
What's the difference?
100
00:04:50,531 --> 00:04:52,430
My Yoko idea, but go ahead.
101
00:04:53,431 --> 00:04:55,364
What? I had nothing
to do with it?
102
00:04:55,364 --> 00:04:57,918
I suggested it
as a thing for you.
103
00:04:57,918 --> 00:05:00,645
Babe, I was reading
the newspaper.
104
00:05:01,197 --> 00:05:03,372
Yes, and I suggested it for you.
105
00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:06,306
Yeah, but I decided to
actually use the idea.
106
00:05:07,168 --> 00:05:09,826
So, the idea to use
my idea was your idea?
107
00:05:10,413 --> 00:05:12,070
That's exactly right.
108
00:05:12,070 --> 00:05:14,141
Know what else?
Do we like this shirt?
109
00:05:14,141 --> 00:05:15,418
No. What are you doing?
110
00:05:15,418 --> 00:05:17,662
-I'm changing.
-You just got home.
111
00:05:17,662 --> 00:05:19,940
That's the
"you know what else?" part.
112
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:21,459
I'm meeting Yoko tonight.
113
00:05:21,976 --> 00:05:23,461
-Tonight?
-At her house.
114
00:05:23,461 --> 00:05:25,635
Oh, my God! What will I wear?
115
00:05:25,635 --> 00:05:27,119
-To what?
-To Yoko.
116
00:05:27,119 --> 00:05:29,639
Babe, it's not
one of those things.
117
00:05:29,639 --> 00:05:32,297
This is a business meeting.
You'll meet her next time.
118
00:05:32,297 --> 00:05:33,816
-Are you kidding?
-What?
119
00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:35,542
I can't come?
120
00:05:35,956 --> 00:05:38,027
-It's a business meeting.
-"A business meeting."
121
00:05:38,027 --> 00:05:39,304
Don't do that.
122
00:05:39,304 --> 00:05:41,927
If I were meeting Pamela Sue
Anderson from Baywatch,
123
00:05:41,927 --> 00:05:43,101
I would let you come.
124
00:05:45,414 --> 00:05:47,174
Okay. A, no, you wouldn't.
125
00:05:49,107 --> 00:05:53,042
And B, you can't compare
Pamela Sue Anderson to Yoko Ono,
126
00:05:53,042 --> 00:05:56,148
except that they're both
carbon-based lifeforms.
127
00:05:56,632 --> 00:06:00,014
And C, you don't bring
a spouse to a business meeting.
128
00:06:00,014 --> 00:06:03,121
-You're going all the way to C?
-I'm not kidding.
129
00:06:03,121 --> 00:06:06,262
Listen, Mr. Big Fancy Guy,
that was my idea.
130
00:06:06,262 --> 00:06:09,817
-Why is that important to you?
-Secondly, this was my idea.
131
00:06:09,817 --> 00:06:12,993
If it were up to me,
I would take you.
132
00:06:12,993 --> 00:06:14,374
-Really?
-Of course.
133
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,962
-I love it when you're with me.
-Really?
134
00:06:16,962 --> 00:06:18,964
I just don't know
if it's appropriate
135
00:06:18,964 --> 00:06:20,345
'cause it's business.
136
00:06:20,345 --> 00:06:23,244
I think Yoko Ono would
understand if you brought me.
137
00:06:23,244 --> 00:06:26,109
Excuse me. You... You don't
tell me about Yoko Ono.
138
00:06:26,109 --> 00:06:28,767
-I told you about Yoko Ono.
-Really? I'm going with you.
139
00:06:31,149 --> 00:06:32,150
Okay, but--
140
00:06:32,150 --> 00:06:34,255
I won't tell her it was my idea.
141
00:06:34,911 --> 00:06:36,982
That's not what I was saying.
142
00:06:36,982 --> 00:06:38,639
What were you going to say?
143
00:06:38,639 --> 00:06:39,882
I'm not gonna tell you.
144
00:06:51,203 --> 00:06:52,826
Wow, honey, look at this.
145
00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:54,931
Hey, what did I say
about touching stuff?
146
00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:56,761
-Here, catch.
-Don't!
147
00:06:56,761 --> 00:06:58,003
Oh, relax.
148
00:07:00,350 --> 00:07:02,283
I forgot she makes you
take your shoes off.
149
00:07:02,283 --> 00:07:03,664
I would've worn better socks.
150
00:07:03,664 --> 00:07:05,528
Your socks are fine.
151
00:07:05,528 --> 00:07:07,772
No. These are,
like, sneaker socks
152
00:07:07,772 --> 00:07:09,325
masquerading as dress socks.
153
00:07:10,153 --> 00:07:13,156
-Isn't this beautiful?
-Very. Put it down!
154
00:07:13,156 --> 00:07:14,675
What do you think it is?
155
00:07:14,675 --> 00:07:15,987
It's a thing they make
156
00:07:15,987 --> 00:07:18,852
so you feel terrible
when you break it. Give me this.
157
00:07:20,163 --> 00:07:21,751
Where was it?
All right.
158
00:07:21,751 --> 00:07:23,857
-Look at this picture!
-When she gets here,
159
00:07:23,857 --> 00:07:25,824
don't ask anything
about the Beatles.
160
00:07:25,824 --> 00:07:28,724
-Honey, I know not to...
-Nothing about the Beatles.
161
00:07:28,724 --> 00:07:31,899
-It makes her crazy.
-What are you, her best friend?
162
00:07:33,211 --> 00:07:34,695
I know what I'm talking about.
163
00:07:34,695 --> 00:07:37,249
Ask her about
her new album or her art.
164
00:07:37,249 --> 00:07:40,390
Maybe she wants to make
some weird conceptual art film.
165
00:07:40,390 --> 00:07:42,531
Like, a room full of people
yawning for peace.
166
00:07:43,221 --> 00:07:45,499
That shows how little
you know about Yoko.
167
00:07:45,499 --> 00:07:46,949
She doesn't do that anymore.
168
00:07:46,949 --> 00:07:49,054
She does
very conventional stuff.
169
00:07:49,054 --> 00:07:52,023
She's doing these great
paintings and drawings...
170
00:07:52,023 --> 00:07:53,403
Are you paying attention to me?
171
00:07:54,266 --> 00:07:56,130
-Uh-huh.
-Get out of there. Come here.
172
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,823
Listen, now...
173
00:07:59,789 --> 00:08:02,067
she may ask us
about our birthdays
174
00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:04,484
-and where we were born.
-There's a quiz?
175
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:06,900
No, but she does that
before she works with somebody.
176
00:08:06,900 --> 00:08:08,142
She's into that.
177
00:08:08,142 --> 00:08:11,629
I know the date and place of
my birth, so I'll be all right.
178
00:08:12,595 --> 00:08:15,425
I'm a little nervous
about my birthday.
179
00:08:15,425 --> 00:08:18,187
-Why?
-I don't think it's a good one.
180
00:08:20,638 --> 00:08:23,710
-What's the matter with you?
-It's just not good.
181
00:08:23,710 --> 00:08:26,298
April nineteenth.
Nineteenth, what is that?
182
00:08:26,298 --> 00:08:29,647
It's just such
a nowhere birthday.
183
00:08:29,647 --> 00:08:32,304
Did you know Sandy Duncan was
born on the same day as Hitler?
184
00:08:34,859 --> 00:08:36,550
-Is that true?
-I'm pretty sure.
185
00:08:37,827 --> 00:08:39,691
-Why do you know that?
-I just do.
186
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,695
Really? And people still like
Sandy Duncan, right?
187
00:08:43,695 --> 00:08:45,455
You'll be fine.
Wow, what do you think
188
00:08:45,455 --> 00:08:46,905
-this goes for?
-[VASE JANGLES]
189
00:08:46,905 --> 00:08:47,941
Give me that.
190
00:08:48,389 --> 00:08:50,046
-Don't bite.
-Sit down.
191
00:08:50,046 --> 00:08:51,116
I'm sitting.
192
00:08:51,116 --> 00:08:53,498
Sit down.
No touching and no staring.
193
00:08:54,085 --> 00:08:56,777
-No mentioning the Beatles.
-Nothing about the Beatles.
194
00:08:58,399 --> 00:09:01,506
♪ ["I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND"
BY THE BEATLES PLAYS] ♪
195
00:09:12,413 --> 00:09:13,414
Hi.
196
00:09:13,829 --> 00:09:15,485
-Hi.
-Sorry to keep you.
197
00:09:15,485 --> 00:09:17,142
-Oh.
-Thank you for coming.
198
00:09:17,142 --> 00:09:20,905
It's an honor to meet you.
And thank you for coming.
199
00:09:20,905 --> 00:09:22,596
Well, it's my apartment.
200
00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:25,219
Of course. I meant,
thanks for coming in the room.
201
00:09:25,875 --> 00:09:27,083
-Yes, of course.
-Yeah.
202
00:09:27,083 --> 00:09:28,188
-Hello.
-Hi.
203
00:09:28,188 --> 00:09:30,811
Sorry. This is my wife Jamie.
204
00:09:30,811 --> 00:09:32,399
Nice to meet you. I'm Yoko.
205
00:09:32,399 --> 00:09:33,849
-Yoko Ono.
-I understand.
206
00:09:33,849 --> 00:09:36,368
Very nice to meet you.
207
00:09:36,368 --> 00:09:37,438
Please sit down.
208
00:09:38,923 --> 00:09:40,890
And so you came together?
209
00:09:41,511 --> 00:09:43,755
-Yeah. If that's a problem...
-Not at all.
210
00:09:43,755 --> 00:09:47,138
Behind every great man, there is
a greater woman. [LAUGHS]
211
00:09:47,138 --> 00:09:49,243
-Yes. So true.
-[YOKO LAUGHS]
212
00:09:49,243 --> 00:09:51,694
You know, if I had a creed,
that would be it.
213
00:09:52,626 --> 00:09:53,765
That'd be your creed?
214
00:09:55,767 --> 00:09:58,080
So, may I tell you
about my project?
215
00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,771
-Please.
-Please do.
216
00:09:59,771 --> 00:10:03,948
Well, one day I was walking
down Columbus Avenue.
217
00:10:03,948 --> 00:10:05,915
I got excited
with this thought of--
218
00:10:05,915 --> 00:10:07,986
Sorry. Do you need
to know my birthday?
219
00:10:09,125 --> 00:10:10,368
Why?
220
00:10:10,368 --> 00:10:12,577
I don't know, I thought you do.
221
00:10:13,198 --> 00:10:16,029
-No.
-Oh, okay, sorry.
222
00:10:16,029 --> 00:10:18,514
Anyway, as I was saying
about this project--
223
00:10:18,514 --> 00:10:20,447
'Cause April 19th
is what it is.
224
00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:24,416
-April 19th.
-PAUL: Yes.
225
00:10:25,038 --> 00:10:26,626
You weren't born in New York?
226
00:10:27,523 --> 00:10:29,698
-I was.
-Ooh.
227
00:10:32,217 --> 00:10:33,391
Is that bad?
228
00:10:33,391 --> 00:10:34,495
Just kidding!
229
00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:38,948
A joke. Yoko made a joke
at my expense, there.
230
00:10:38,948 --> 00:10:39,984
I saw that!
231
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:44,851
People never think I'm funny,
but I can be, too.
232
00:10:44,851 --> 00:10:46,266
No, I'm sure.
233
00:10:46,266 --> 00:10:49,994
I suppose people have
a certain image of you.
234
00:10:49,994 --> 00:10:51,374
What kind of image?
235
00:10:54,481 --> 00:10:55,585
What do they have?
236
00:10:59,141 --> 00:11:01,177
Who knows.
I suppose... You know...
237
00:11:01,177 --> 00:11:03,352
Not that you were
responsible for breaking up--
238
00:11:03,352 --> 00:11:04,353
Okay!
239
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:09,496
That's all right. What were you
saying about the project?
240
00:11:09,496 --> 00:11:11,567
I'm very excited
with this project
241
00:11:11,567 --> 00:11:14,328
and I think you're just the
filmmaker who can pull it off.
242
00:11:14,328 --> 00:11:17,297
I'm awfully flattered.
What is the idea?
243
00:11:18,298 --> 00:11:20,162
I want you to film the wind.
244
00:11:25,650 --> 00:11:27,169
-The wind?
-Yes.
245
00:11:29,309 --> 00:11:30,690
-Film it?
-Yes.
246
00:11:33,175 --> 00:11:34,555
Seriously?
247
00:11:37,524 --> 00:11:38,939
Well, that's a good idea.
248
00:11:46,015 --> 00:11:48,293
-Film the wind?
-I like it.
249
00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:51,676
-But you can't see wind.
- So far.
250
00:11:51,676 --> 00:11:54,368
Shouldn't you make films
about things you can see?
251
00:11:54,368 --> 00:11:55,853
Anybody can do that.
252
00:11:55,853 --> 00:11:58,200
To film the wind,
that takes skill.
253
00:11:59,028 --> 00:12:01,341
I'm gonna ask a question.
Answer me honestly.
254
00:12:01,341 --> 00:12:03,377
-Go.
-If my sister suggested
255
00:12:03,377 --> 00:12:05,345
filming the wind,
would you do it?
256
00:12:05,345 --> 00:12:06,726
-Yes.
-Liar.
257
00:12:07,899 --> 00:12:09,176
All right, that was a lie.
258
00:12:09,176 --> 00:12:11,351
Just admit it. It's a bad idea.
259
00:12:11,351 --> 00:12:13,215
No. You don't know.
260
00:12:13,215 --> 00:12:15,217
Who's to say what's a good idea?
261
00:12:15,217 --> 00:12:17,840
You think when Picasso showed
his first cubist painting,
262
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:19,704
Everybody said,
"that's a great idea"?
263
00:12:19,704 --> 00:12:21,292
No, they said, "That stinks!
264
00:12:21,292 --> 00:12:23,639
You got two eyes
on one side of the head."
265
00:12:23,639 --> 00:12:27,505
-Okay, but filming the wind?
-It could be good. Great!
266
00:12:27,505 --> 00:12:29,818
-Yoko said--
-"Yoko said."
267
00:12:30,335 --> 00:12:32,510
-What?
-And now you're be on a fast?
268
00:12:32,510 --> 00:12:34,201
No. I said I might try it.
269
00:12:35,478 --> 00:12:37,826
-'Cause Yoko said--
-"Yoko said"!
270
00:12:37,826 --> 00:12:40,932
When she starts a new project,
she goes on a fast.
271
00:12:40,932 --> 00:12:43,693
If we're working together,
why wouldn't I try it?
272
00:12:43,693 --> 00:12:45,488
Why would you do that?
273
00:12:45,488 --> 00:12:47,974
What, like eating is
working out terrifically for me?
274
00:12:47,974 --> 00:12:49,734
Have you been
on a cleansing fast?
275
00:12:49,734 --> 00:12:52,219
Do you know what it feels like
to fast for five days?
276
00:12:52,219 --> 00:12:53,634
I'll let you know in five days.
277
00:12:54,532 --> 00:12:57,673
If Yoko said, "jump off the
Brooklyn Bridge," would you?
278
00:12:57,673 --> 00:12:59,399
I wouldn't do it, necessarily,
279
00:12:59,399 --> 00:13:01,642
but I wouldn't
dismiss it summarily.
280
00:13:04,231 --> 00:13:06,199
"Yoko said"!
281
00:13:08,339 --> 00:13:09,478
What?
282
00:13:14,103 --> 00:13:15,346
SYCOPHANT: Film the wind?
283
00:13:15,346 --> 00:13:16,830
I think it's a great idea.
284
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:19,591
She's spot on.
It's a brilliant concept.
285
00:13:19,591 --> 00:13:21,593
-How do you do that?
-What's that?
286
00:13:22,180 --> 00:13:23,181
Film the wind.
287
00:13:25,321 --> 00:13:27,392
It's not written yet.
288
00:13:29,015 --> 00:13:30,016
Is that turkey?
289
00:13:31,017 --> 00:13:32,604
Tuna. Would you like some?
290
00:13:32,604 --> 00:13:35,366
No. I can't.
I'm fasting five days.
291
00:13:35,366 --> 00:13:38,300
I'm on day two
and I'm getting a bit of a buzz.
292
00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:39,335
[CLEARS THROAT]
293
00:13:40,095 --> 00:13:41,993
-Paul.
-What? Yes.
294
00:13:41,993 --> 00:13:44,133
-When you say wind...
-Yes?
295
00:13:44,133 --> 00:13:45,790
...could you be more specific?
296
00:13:45,790 --> 00:13:47,619
It's all in here.
I have a treatment.
297
00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:50,553
I have a few things
to run by legal,
298
00:13:50,553 --> 00:13:52,935
but I'm pretty sure wind
is public domain.
299
00:13:54,972 --> 00:13:56,594
-Wow.
-What?
300
00:13:59,769 --> 00:14:01,012
What?
301
00:14:01,012 --> 00:14:03,359
This is what it'll cost
to film the wind?
302
00:14:04,084 --> 00:14:07,847
Okay, you tell me. How much
does it cost to film wind?
303
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:08,848
You tell me.
304
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:11,367
This costs more
than the shark expedition.
305
00:14:11,367 --> 00:14:13,611
Yeah, because anybody
can film sharks.
306
00:14:13,611 --> 00:14:16,441
Get in a cage, wave meat,
they just show up.
307
00:14:16,441 --> 00:14:18,858
Try to get wind
when you need it,
308
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,204
then talk to me.
309
00:14:20,825 --> 00:14:22,896
-That's my point.
-What's your point?
310
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:25,519
Because I don't follow you.
I don't understand.
311
00:14:26,348 --> 00:14:27,452
We don't get it.
312
00:14:28,108 --> 00:14:29,696
What don't you get?
313
00:14:29,696 --> 00:14:32,354
I don't understand
what you don't get.
314
00:14:32,354 --> 00:14:34,149
Wind, wind,
as free as the wind.
315
00:14:34,149 --> 00:14:35,426
I should write this down.
316
00:14:37,014 --> 00:14:38,774
But when we film the wind,
317
00:14:38,774 --> 00:14:40,672
what, exactly,
will you be filming?
318
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:41,777
[EXHALES]
319
00:14:42,709 --> 00:14:44,055
You know what?
320
00:14:44,055 --> 00:14:46,092
Forget it. Just forget it, okay?
321
00:14:46,092 --> 00:14:48,266
Forget the wind.
Forget the whole thing.
322
00:14:48,266 --> 00:14:50,717
I'm so tired of the abuse
and the questions.
323
00:14:50,717 --> 00:14:51,994
Everybody questioning
everything!
324
00:14:53,306 --> 00:14:56,033
I'm so tired of the whole
Mickey Mouse operation.
325
00:14:56,033 --> 00:14:58,828
If you don't want to be part
of this wind-breaking project...
326
00:14:58,828 --> 00:14:59,899
What did I say?
327
00:15:00,623 --> 00:15:03,212
This groundbreaking project,
then fine.
328
00:15:03,212 --> 00:15:05,145
We'll take it somewhere else.
I'm sure A&E
329
00:15:05,145 --> 00:15:08,873
or the Weather Channel will
be happy. I'll tell Miss Ono.
330
00:15:08,873 --> 00:15:12,221
Paul, look, I've spoken
to the people upstairs.
331
00:15:12,221 --> 00:15:13,913
They love that we got Yoko.
332
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,501
They're bumping
Jacques Cousteau for this.
333
00:15:16,501 --> 00:15:18,503
Go. Spend what
you've got to spend,
334
00:15:18,503 --> 00:15:20,885
but remember,
there's a lot riding on this.
335
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:23,267
Did you have bacon
this morning?
336
00:15:28,306 --> 00:15:30,446
-IRA: Paulie, smell that.
-PAUL: What?
337
00:15:30,446 --> 00:15:33,967
-The city, the crisp air.
-This is what I want to get.
338
00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:37,591
Wind, you know, like night wind.
Autumn wind, you know.
339
00:15:37,591 --> 00:15:40,215
I was thinking, for music
underneath, check this out.
340
00:15:40,215 --> 00:15:42,769
♪ ["TALKING TO THE UNIVERSE"
BY YOKO ONO PLAYS] ♪
341
00:15:42,769 --> 00:15:45,151
-What is that?
-That's Yoko's new album.
342
00:15:46,221 --> 00:15:48,533
-You don't like it?
-I didn't say that.
343
00:15:49,879 --> 00:15:51,709
-You don't get it.
-I don't get what?
344
00:15:51,709 --> 00:15:53,366
You don't get it
'cause it's art,
345
00:15:53,366 --> 00:15:54,505
like this wind movie.
346
00:15:55,230 --> 00:15:58,336
-This wind movie is not art.
-What, like you know?
347
00:15:58,336 --> 00:16:00,925
-Yeah. Wanna know what art is?
-Tell me.
348
00:16:00,925 --> 00:16:03,410
Art is the representation
of that which the mind
349
00:16:03,410 --> 00:16:05,619
can imagine but only
the heart knows to be true.
350
00:16:07,138 --> 00:16:09,037
Where did you get that,
Empire Szechuan?
351
00:16:10,314 --> 00:16:13,041
What, you think you know
everything about me?
352
00:16:13,041 --> 00:16:14,801
Want to know what else art is?
353
00:16:14,801 --> 00:16:16,803
This meatball hero
from Stromboli's.
354
00:16:16,803 --> 00:16:19,288
They have this olive oil...
you got to try it.
355
00:16:19,288 --> 00:16:20,565
I can't! Yoko said--
356
00:16:20,565 --> 00:16:23,085
"Yoko said"! You're driving
yourself crazy!
357
00:16:23,085 --> 00:16:25,950
It's a big deal for me!
I'm doing a film for Yoko Ono.
358
00:16:25,950 --> 00:16:27,676
I don't want to screw it up.
359
00:16:27,676 --> 00:16:30,334
And the Explorer Channel
is all hot and bothered.
360
00:16:30,334 --> 00:16:31,749
They want something great.
361
00:16:31,749 --> 00:16:33,613
I have no idea
what the hell I'm doing.
362
00:16:33,613 --> 00:16:35,753
I'm on a roof at night,
filming wind.
363
00:16:35,753 --> 00:16:36,857
Yeah, look at yourself!
364
00:16:36,857 --> 00:16:39,584
Oh, I was supposed to meet
Yoko half an hour ago!
365
00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:42,104
-Eat something!
-I can't! Yoko said!
366
00:16:42,518 --> 00:16:43,519
"Yoko said".
367
00:16:44,555 --> 00:16:45,728
Hey! The wind!
368
00:16:50,871 --> 00:16:52,011
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
369
00:16:54,703 --> 00:16:55,807
Hello.
370
00:16:56,567 --> 00:16:57,740
Paul?
371
00:16:58,845 --> 00:16:59,915
Paul, is that you?
372
00:17:01,675 --> 00:17:02,676
Slow down, honey.
373
00:17:03,850 --> 00:17:06,059
You have to slow down.
I don't understand.
374
00:17:07,405 --> 00:17:10,339
Now you've slowed down,
but you're speaking Danish.
375
00:17:12,410 --> 00:17:13,998
Yoko? What about Yoko?
376
00:17:14,792 --> 00:17:17,174
I don't know. I haven't checked
the messages. Hold on.
377
00:17:18,382 --> 00:17:19,797
[ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]
378
00:17:19,797 --> 00:17:22,282
YOKO: Paul, it's Yoko. 7:20.
379
00:17:22,282 --> 00:17:24,560
-Guess you're on your way.-[BEEP]
380
00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:26,769
-Did you hear that?
-[PAUL WHIMPERS UNINTELLIGIBLY]
381
00:17:26,769 --> 00:17:30,497
YOKO: It's 8:45.
And I'm not laughing.
382
00:17:30,497 --> 00:17:31,878
[DOORBELL BUZZES]
383
00:17:31,878 --> 00:17:33,397
Hold on. Don't move.
384
00:17:34,122 --> 00:17:36,089
-Who is it?
-Yoko.
385
00:17:37,332 --> 00:17:39,403
Uh... Just one second.
386
00:17:40,093 --> 00:17:42,613
Paul, it's Yoko! She's here!
She's outside... who is this?
387
00:17:43,441 --> 00:17:45,409
Where is the man who was
just on this phone?
388
00:17:46,444 --> 00:17:48,205
Well, pick him up
and put him on.
389
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,347
Never mind!
390
00:17:52,347 --> 00:17:53,658
Yoko...
391
00:17:54,487 --> 00:17:56,109
-Hi, Jamie.
-Come in.
392
00:17:56,109 --> 00:17:58,974
-Have you seen Paul?
-He was just on the phone.
393
00:17:58,974 --> 00:18:02,184
He was supposed to meet me
an hour and a half ago.
394
00:18:02,184 --> 00:18:06,119
Please come in.
He said to apologize profusely.
395
00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:09,985
He's on his way, and he'll
explain when he gets here.
396
00:18:09,985 --> 00:18:11,676
He said to trust him.
397
00:18:11,676 --> 00:18:13,644
He has everything
under control.
398
00:18:13,644 --> 00:18:15,473
PAUL: Yoko!
399
00:18:16,025 --> 00:18:18,511
Yoko!
400
00:18:18,511 --> 00:18:22,031
Then I would do a split
to symbolize the split
401
00:18:22,031 --> 00:18:24,689
between the male
and female within us.
402
00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,553
It was college.
I was more limber then.
403
00:18:27,175 --> 00:18:28,900
Then I would...
404
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:31,627
I would slowly rise up
and bring my legs together
405
00:18:31,627 --> 00:18:34,216
to symbolize the unity
of our separate selves.
406
00:18:35,148 --> 00:18:36,563
And then I ended
with some leaps.
407
00:18:38,634 --> 00:18:39,773
That's very nice.
408
00:18:42,707 --> 00:18:44,813
-May I use your phone?
-Sure.
409
00:18:44,813 --> 00:18:46,159
I just want to get my messages.
410
00:18:46,159 --> 00:18:48,230
For privacy,
there's one in the bedroom.
411
00:18:48,230 --> 00:18:49,473
-Good, thank you.
-Okay.
412
00:18:51,820 --> 00:18:54,478
God help me! I lost Yoko!
413
00:18:54,478 --> 00:18:56,376
-Sweetie...
-I can't do this anymore.
414
00:18:56,376 --> 00:18:58,585
My brain is fried,
and I'm so hungry,
415
00:18:58,585 --> 00:19:01,001
I would eat my fried brain.
That's how hungry I am.
416
00:19:01,001 --> 00:19:02,969
-Sweetie...
-I don't know what I'm doing!
417
00:19:02,969 --> 00:19:04,143
You can't film wind!
418
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:06,662
It's swirling around and blowing
and getting in my eyes.
419
00:19:06,662 --> 00:19:07,732
-Sweetie!
-What?
420
00:19:08,768 --> 00:19:09,838
[YELPS]
421
00:19:11,805 --> 00:19:12,944
Yoko.
422
00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:16,016
-Hello, Paul.
-Hi. Um...
423
00:19:16,948 --> 00:19:19,296
So, uh... [EXHALES]
424
00:19:19,710 --> 00:19:20,711
How's everything?
425
00:19:21,229 --> 00:19:22,713
Well, you tell me.
426
00:19:23,403 --> 00:19:25,440
Good. It's all good.
Everything... [CLEARS THROAT]
427
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:26,786
What is this?
428
00:19:26,786 --> 00:19:29,892
It this one of those Armenian
roll-up sandwiches I love?
429
00:19:29,892 --> 00:19:31,929
Yes, honey. Want a little bit?
430
00:19:31,929 --> 00:19:33,172
Paul.
431
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,691
You know what they have
in this, Yoko?
432
00:19:35,691 --> 00:19:37,486
These little pickles.
They slice them,
433
00:19:37,486 --> 00:19:39,661
-You can get them separately.
-YOKO: Paul...
434
00:19:39,661 --> 00:19:42,388
-And they cut the eggplant...
-Sweetie, have a piece.
435
00:19:42,388 --> 00:19:45,736
I can't. I'm fasting.
No food! No food at all.
436
00:19:45,736 --> 00:19:48,083
-Paul?
-Yes, Yoko, I'm with you.
437
00:19:48,083 --> 00:19:50,603
You don't have to film
the wind, you know.
438
00:19:50,603 --> 00:19:54,607
No, I'm going to...
I want to film the wind...
439
00:19:55,366 --> 00:19:56,402
Really?
440
00:19:56,402 --> 00:19:58,438
It's only an idea.
It's no biggie.
441
00:20:03,029 --> 00:20:04,686
-I need more.
-I think so.
442
00:20:04,686 --> 00:20:07,482
Well, I tell you...
This is so good.
443
00:20:07,482 --> 00:20:09,311
I'm very glad
to hear that, Yoko,
444
00:20:09,311 --> 00:20:11,451
because I don't know
how to do it. [LAUGHS]
445
00:20:11,451 --> 00:20:13,867
I'm out there trying.
I don't see it.
446
00:20:13,867 --> 00:20:16,974
I don't... I don't think
I'm fasting anymore!
447
00:20:17,906 --> 00:20:19,735
Maybe it was just
a bad idea.
448
00:20:20,184 --> 00:20:22,393
Everybody's entitled
to one bad idea.
449
00:20:23,014 --> 00:20:25,845
John once thought that Ringo
should be in the front.
450
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:30,505
And I just said,
"John, come on."
451
00:20:35,372 --> 00:20:37,236
Well, you were right there,
'cause that's a bad idea.
452
00:20:38,961 --> 00:20:40,963
Honey, the problem is,
you promised
453
00:20:40,963 --> 00:20:43,449
the Explorer Channel
a Yoko film.
454
00:20:43,449 --> 00:20:45,451
They gave you a budget
and a time slot.
455
00:20:45,451 --> 00:20:47,418
Well, we can do
something else.
456
00:20:47,901 --> 00:20:49,869
Paul, tell me
what you want to do.
457
00:20:51,284 --> 00:20:52,596
-What I want to do?
-Mm-hmm.
458
00:20:54,839 --> 00:20:57,117
Okay, 'cause I have
a lot of ideas.
459
00:20:57,117 --> 00:20:58,187
Mm-hmm.
460
00:20:59,188 --> 00:21:02,468
Ideas are never the problem
'cause I'm a fountain of ideas.
461
00:21:03,572 --> 00:21:04,642
Um...
462
00:21:05,540 --> 00:21:07,058
Okay, I was just thinking,
463
00:21:07,058 --> 00:21:10,786
what about you're
in the Chrysler Building...
464
00:21:11,718 --> 00:21:12,995
and there are falcons.
465
00:21:13,824 --> 00:21:16,102
-Hmm. And it's windy?
-Yeah!
466
00:21:23,074 --> 00:21:27,803
♪ ["GIVE PEACE A CHANCE"
BY JOHN LENNON PLAYS] ♪
467
00:21:38,262 --> 00:21:39,470
Give peace a chance.
468
00:21:40,126 --> 00:21:41,679
That's all we are saying.
34465
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