Original subtitles

♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas... ♪

♪ And a Happy New Year...

♪ Good tidings for Christmas and a Happy New Year ♪

♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas... ♪

♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas... ♪

♪ And a Happy...

Morning.

Hi, Dad.

Have you got everything?

Hi. My name is Paul, and I'm an alcoholic.

Hi, Paul.

I'm still learning about how this works.

But I... I do know this much.

There is no way that I would have been able

to stay sober for 18 months...

if I didn't have the love and the support of my family...

and my best friend and sponsor - Zack.

Hello, sweetheart.

How's it going with our Christmas decorations?

All right. But I'm always puzzled.

I can't remember...

Is it on the left ear, or on the right ear?

I, quite frankly, like it on both.

That's very fetching.

Mom! Dad!

Hey!

Hi, honey. Welcome home! Welcome home!

Thank you.

And Vicki, nice to see you again.

Hi, Mr. Fowler. Thank you for having me.

We like to have Christmas carols from you.

You know, that's what we count on.

It'll be the best time.

You guys both staying here?

- Hi. - Hi.

How are you?

How are you?

- Merry... - Merry...

- Christmas. - Christmas.

- Merry... - Merry...

- Christmas. - Christmas.

- That's great. - Thank you.

Hey, Roy. Is everything all right?

I just...

I mean, are you sure it makes sense for me to come?

Just because my sister got married,

doesn't make me some kind of a wedding expert.

Well, you know more than me.

And besides, you and Vicki are my best friends.

I need you both here.

What about your brother?

I mean, I just...

Did you tell him about me and Gavin?

God, I haven't seen him since we...

went our separate ways.

You didn't go your separate ways.

Paul cheated on you, and then you dumped him -

a lot more gently than I would have.

But, yes, he knows, and he's better now, Roy.

Really.

OK. I'll be there soon.

All right, I love you.

I love you, too.

- So, that was Alana. - I figured.

Tell me again who's gonna be there.

Alana and her family, including her brother, Paul.

Right, Paul the A-hole.

Whoa, the very hot A-hole.

Is Alana adopted?

Yeah. She and Paul both are.

It's still hard to believe how stupid I was.

I thought things were perfect.

He was smart, he was funny, he was handsome,

he was sexy as hell.

And then one weekend I came for a surprise visit

and found out things weren't as perfect as I thought they were.

Oops.

Wow.

Exactly.

And to make the whole pathetic thing

that much more pathetic,

Alana spent two solid years trying to set me up.

Suddenly, visiting her was like speed dating.

I couldn't take it any more, so finally I just...

I lied.

I told her you and I got back together.

So you looking forward to Christmas with the family?

I'm a little nervous, to tell you the truth.

My sister asked Roy to come, so...

I'll finally get my chance to apologize.

That's... I'm proud of you, man.

That's really good.

Thanks.

Yeah, you're still buying lunch today though,

'cause I just sold a dozen areca palms,

so you're not catching me.

I can sell a lot of trees in 20 minutes.

Did you know that pizza actually tastes better

when someone else buys it for you?

When you're hurtful... I feel sad inside.

And then I wonder whether I should say nice things

about you to my sister's friend Vicki,

who will be visiting us over the holidays.

Thank you for doing this, Gavin.

So, it's Alana we're trying to fool - not Paul.

And Paul.

I never expected her to invite me to her parents' house

for Christmas to do this wedding planning thing,

and Paul still lives there, and...

OK, OK.

What else do I have to know?

I mean, how did it happen? You and me, part two.

Like, we were at dinner, and you said,

You know how you annoy me

by being a night person. When I'm a morning person,

and how we have completely different tastes

in food and fashion?

Yeah, right. What a disaster.

No, I just... I told Alana the real stuff.

That we hooked up the summer before college.

But then we were friends.

We'd been close... we got closer.

She didn't ask for details, so...

Well, people see what they want to see.

Amen to that.

Alana will see me being happy.

And Paul?

And Paul.

Whoa! Hey, what is this?

That's the book.

You finished writing the book?!

542 pages.

That's amazing!

Can I read it?

Yeah. I think now you have to read it.

You owe me.

♪

Alana! Vicki!

In here, Daddy.

Hello, beautiful ladies. I've got a joke for you.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar.

Cookies!

Careful, Daddy, they're hot!

I'm just gonna let that cool.

So, Alana... Now, when is Kirk arriving?

He should get here tomorrow around lunchtime.

Excellent. Glad he's gonna be in on the wedding plans.

Um, listen, honey. I realize Meryl...

Well, Mommy, has told you...

Well, she's probably told you everything.

I just want you to know...

Hello!

Don't eat all the cookies!

Never mind. We can talk about this later.

Yeah, it's still hot.

Welcome! Merry Christmas!

This is my father...

Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Gavin.

And this is Vicki.

College friend Vicki, who can sing.

Um

Roy told me a little about you on the way here.

I brought a gift for you and Mrs. Fowler.

You haven't told me anything about Gavin.

Let's get your stuff up to your room.

- Thank you. - And then I'll...

I'll give you a tour of the house, all right?

Alana's mother's on the phone...

- Is Paul here? - No.

Roy, come on.

Two-to three-hundred guests.

June 30th.

Terrific, terrific.

I look forward to seeing what you come up with.

OK, thank you so much. Bye.

Paul, is everything OK?

Hey, Mom. Everything's fine.

I just called to say I'll be a little late.

Zack ran to the store to pick up.

Chanukah present for his niece, and he got a little hung up.

Go ahead with dinner. I'll be home as soon as I can.

Hey, did Roy get there yet?

I was just going downstairs to say hello when you called.

Damn it.

I was hoping to be there before he arrived.

I haven't spoken to him since...

Since you were a selfish jackass.

Yes, Mother - since I was a selfish jackass.

Roy and Vicki have come all this way

to help your sister plan her wedding.

So I don't want there to be any drama.

I've been out of the drama business for a while, OK?

This weekend is about Christmas

and about planning Alana's wedding.

Not about me.

Believe me, I understand.

Great. I'll see you when you get here.

So, what do you interpret? Plays or lectures?

I do a little bit of everything.

But the best jobs are concerts.

I love interpreting song lyrics.

Can you sign Christmas carols?

- What's that? - Joy to the World.

Bravo!

- Is that sign language? - Hey! Paul's home!

Finally.

There he is.

Hey, Mom.

Hey, Sweetheart. I'll get you some food.

And look who's here.

Welcome home!

How was your flight? Good?

Yes!

Yes, thank you for asking.

Roy.

You look great, man.

It's really good to see you.

And you must be Gavin.

You're a lucky man...

Roy's a terrific guy.

Thanks.

I, I think so.

So, why do you know sign language?

Gavin's an ASL interpreter.

Cool.

I learned a little back in 4th grade when Chip...

- Mosely. - Chip Mosely.

Thanks, Mom.

Yeah, he was this kid who lived down the street.

He was deaf.

Hey, Mom, I want to sign something for you -

and Gavin will interpret?

Sure.

OK.

Thank you... I am a goat.

I was actually going for, Thank you, Mom, I love you.

When are we expecting Kirk to arrive?

Um, remember...

He'll be here tomorrow, around lunch.

That's right... Excellent.

I'm glad he's gonna be in on the wedding plans.

OK, the teams will be the boys against the girls.

- What?! - That doesn't seem right.

- No. - Why not?

Exactly. Why not?

It's just that Paul is...

Paul is not a gifted charades player.

I'm getting better.

That is right, dear. You are getting so much better.

And guess what?

You can use sign language if the clue is - I am a goat.

OK, that's it.

The men are going first.

- OK, he can't be that bad. - He's that bad.

And if he tries for the whole thing,

we're completely screwed.

90 seconds, and go.

It's not going to change, dear,

no matter how much time you spend looking at it.

All right, all right. I got it.

Book.

- Three words. - Three words.

Good, good.

No, don't... Why do you do this?

What?

He's going for the whole thing.

One minute.

The clock is running, Paul.

Not good at all.

Is that a clue, or are you having some kind of a stroke?

What is that? What is this?

Um... The DaVinci Code.

Yes! Woo!

How did you get that?

How did you get The DaVinci Code from this?

I don't believe it! That was the Mona Lisa.

Exactly.

- My... - 59 seconds.

Well, that's never gonna happen again.

No.

OK, who's next?

I'll go.

Good luck.

90 seconds, and... Go!

Movie.

- Six words. - Six words.

OK.

No! No!

No, no, the rookie's making a big move. I like it.

I like it.

- God! - Gosh.

What is that? Is that three syllables?

I don't believe it; he's worse than Paul.

No.

Lights, camera...

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

- Wow! - Whoa!

In the movie, Paul Newman has to fight

the biggest guy in the Hole in the Wall Gang.

And there's no way he can win.

So then he says,

"We have to agree on some rules."

But the big guy goes,

"But there's no rules in a knife fight."

Which is when Newman kicks him, the big guy,

right in the downstairs neighbors,

and says, "OK, somebody say, 'One, two, three, go!'"

All right, my turn, my turn, my turn.

All right, here we go...

Now what was that?

We used to call that The Twist, right?

All right, here we go.

All right... I got two, that's no good.

- Three words. - OK.

First word.

They're never gonna get this.

♪

I'm not sure we're gonna get a chance

to talk much over the next few days...

Well, um, I just wanted to say that...

Well, Gavin seems like a great guy.

And you seem really happy,

and I... I think that's awesome.

And...

Well, I wanted to apologize...

For everything I did when we were together.

I mean...

I was really selfish back then, man.

And, well, I'm trying very hard to change the way I live.

I quit drinking.

I'm going to AA meetings almost every day.

I'm working the 12 steps all the time and...

Well, even though it's... it may have taken me a while

to realize what a big mistake I made...

I do realize it.

And I'm sorry.

I'm truly sorry.

Well, good night.

Um, Paul...

Good night.

So, I heard what Paul said... That's kind of great.

Yeah...

Yeah, I guess.

He did everything but beg you to take him back.

Isn't that the point of all this?

No! No!

No, God, no!

The point of this is...

I just didn't want him to see me as...

some kind of loser.

Are you guys decent?

Yeah!

Roy! You call this decent?

No, no, no, no! Sorry, not decent!

Not decent at all! Don't come in!

I can come back.

Put that away!

My God, not there!

Well, where do you want me to put it?

You know what...

I'll see you guys in the morning.

You can come in now, really!

Are you sure?

Yeah.

Hi.

You guys... OK?

Yeah, we're comfy.

We're really, really comfy.

Great.

I... just came in because I got this present,

and I forgot to give it to you.

Aren't we exchanging gifts on Christmas?

This isn't a Christmas present.

It's a thank you for coming to help me.

I really appreciate you giving up your Christmas

for me and my crazy wedding plans.

I'm so overwhelmed.

Mistletoe!

I'm so happy for you,

I thought I'd, you know,

do something to help you get into the holiday spirit.

Yup.

Mwah!

OK, gentlemen, that was unacceptable.

I want a 'kiss' kiss.

So do I.

Mistletoe...

Oooh, Merry Christmas!

That's more like it.

Well, I've got to get to bed.

Good night.

I'm so sorry.

♪

You scared the hell out of me.

Sorry.

I couldn't fall asleep; I'm kind of a night person.

Night person?

I'm not familiar with that term.

Pull up a chair. The meeting's just begun.

And by the way - this is great.

I didn't know... Did Roy give that to you?

I'm sorry, I saw it on the table.

I started reading... I didn't realize...

No, no, it's fine.

I gave it to Roy to read, and...

You really liked it?

Like it?

It reminds me of my favorite book:

The Princess Bride.

- You're kidding. - No... Why? Is that bad?

No. I...

That's pretty much exactly what I was going for.

Yeah?

Well, I think it's awesome.

You don't happen to moonlight as an editor

for a publishing house, do you?

Sorry.

I've got as many jobs as I can handle.

Between working at the nursery,

going to AA meetings,

and staying sober.

That can't be easy.

No, but it's so worth it.

The good news is - my alcoholism isn't that bad.

I can drink as much wine as I want.

It's milk, man. I'm just messin' with you.

It's going to be fine.

You and Kirk will have a beautiful wedding.

No, I mean, I've never done anything so big.

Three-hundred guests.

I don't even know where to begin.

Remember when we used to hang out in my dorm room -

and you'd tell me you wanted to get married on the beach...

and everybody in the wedding party would wear white...

and I would sing Amazing Grace...

and then after the ceremony we'd all dance in the sand?

Yeah.

You know the one thing that surprised me

after 18 months of stone cold, sober therapy is that,

I had issues about the fact that I was adopted.

Really?

Every other kid I knew growing up

was so freaking OK with everything.

And me - I was always worried about the things

I screwed up in the past,

or the things I was afraid of in the future.

For some reason, not knowing where I came from,

or who my biological parents were -

that just really messed me up.

And we all thought maybe

I secretly hated myself for being gay.

But turns out, being gay - no problem.

Being adopted - that just freaked me out.

So, how did you quit drinking?

Well, I had a really big week.

First, I got pulled over for a DUI.

So, of course, I immediately got drunk

and started driving around like the idiot that I was.

Yeah...

I crashed into a tree.

Damn. And that made you quit?

I didn't really hit bottom until the next day.

I was coming home from the hospital

and I passed the tree that I'd hit.

And just as I got there

this little girl was walking with her father.

And I realized that,

if she had been in that very same spot hours earlier,

I would have killed her.

Scared the shit out of me.

So the next day, I checked myself into rehab -

my third try -

and, you know, this time I stayed.

Hey, can I show you something I thought was amazing?

Fear not your destiny, for you have shaped it well.

I love when the old man says it to the little boy.

And then when the little boy says it to the prince...

Incredible.

And the wedding scene, like, where do you get this stuff?

I think it's awesome.

I'm sorry. What? I couldn't hear you.

Um, I think it's awesome.

I heard you.

I just wanted to hear you say it again.

Alana told me you were...

Partially deaf. You're fine.

It's not that bad when it's one on one.

Most people get a little weird about it, though.

And they either ignore me completely, or,

they start...

talking...

really...

loud!

♪

Have you talked to Paul at all?

Sort of.

Last night, before bed, he apologized to me.

That's great...

Isn't it?

I didn't exactly accept.

Well, I hope someday you can forgive him,

because he's really changed.

So, I've got the entire day planned.

But first, I want to tell you about this brainstorm

that I had when I woke up this morning.

Good morning, wedding people.

Good morning, sweetheart.

So here it is...

We begin the ceremony with a brass fanfare.

I guess that sounds great.

Isn't it perfect?

So, anyway,

I thought we would start with the big picture items.

Like, exactly where in the yard

you want to have the reception,

how many people in the wedding party,

things like that.

And then, I've invited a caterer and florist

to come by and show you what they think would work.

You know, we were talking last night,

Alana and I, and I asked her to tell me

what her perfect wedding would look like.

Because I thought that would be a great starting point.

That is so true, I totally agree.

I mean, for years, Alana's been talking about

having a big wedding

with a reception here at the house,

with a tent, and waiters,

and a dance floor, and a band...

I just think it's going to be so fabulous.

Paul?

I think your dad needs a little help.

Where is my father?

Over here, behind the gigantic Christmas tree...

that I put together in the wrong place.

Wait a minute, Dad.

Thanks, thanks. Just watch your feet there.

An artificial tree?

Mom has pine needle issues.

Yeah, and it's been decreed

that Florida Christmas trees are unacceptable.

Over here?

- No, no, nope, nope. - Right... here.

There.

- Spread the legs. - Good.

Wooo!

I finished reading your book last night.

It was good. I mean really good.

You wrote a book?

- Not a real book. - It's totally real.

And it's excellent, Dad. You should check it out.

It reminded me of another book I think you'd like,

about a couple of guys that get married.

It's called All Through the Night.

I read that one. That was fun.

I see that you're dressed for the holidays.

Yeah, I wasn't expecting the manual labor

to begin before lunch.

Well, it reminds me of a yuletide joke.

No, no, no, I apologize in advance.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Why do nymphomaniacs love Christmas?

Because it's the one holiday you can never have too many balls.

It is funny, isn't it? My son has no sense of humor.

I'll get you that book.

Thanks for your help, guys.

And it was a good joke.

You'll get used to my dad.

Where is it?

Got it.

Well, thank you.

I'm gonna take a shower.

- Yeah. - OK, great.

Tree's in place... Gavin helped.

Wonderful.

And the location?

The location is exact. Christmas remains unmarred.

I love you.

So, Alana, when are we expecting Kirk?

He'll be here around lunchtime, Daddy.

And we'll let you know as soon as he arrives.

Excellent.

I'm glad he's gonna be here for the planning.

I think I'm gonna stretch my legs for a minute.

Does anybody have any idea where Gavin is?

I think he's upstairs with Paul.

Great.

How is the planning going?

It's coming along.

That's my least-favorite photo.

Why?

I was drunk when we took that picture.

I keep it around as a reminder.

In fact, it was right...

- Aw. - I'm sorry.

Hey, Paul, you in here?

Hey, Roy.

Hey, Paul.

What are you doing down there?

Um, I was, um, I was getting this book...

that I dropped.

This book I was getting for Gavin.

Have you seen him?

- Who? - Gavin.

No... Yes... No... Not really.

What I mean is, yes, he was in the living room

when we were setting up the tree.

I guess, I don't know, maybe...

Is that his manuscript?

I've been looking for it.

I left it downstairs yesterday.

Did you read it?

Yeah.

You've got a very talented boyfriend, Roy.

I think it's awesome.

I haven't read it yet.

You should. I think you'll love it.

"Fear not your destiny, for you have shaped it well."

- What? - Nothing.

It's just a line from his book that I really liked.

Listen...

I've been thinking... about what you said last night.

And I'm glad that you're doing well.

I am.

I'm glad you're doing well, too.

Gavin is... Well, he's great.

Hey, Roy, we need you!

I'll be right there!

I should get back to the wedding thing.

It's not going well.

I noticed.

Wow.

You should get out of here.

♪

Escaping the madness?

Maybe a little.

♪ ♪

Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!

I brought lunch.

Hey, Kirk Corbett, the son of a preacher man!

- Hey, Pop. - I brought cake!

Zack, Kirk, welcome, welcome, welcome.

Hey, where's Alana?

Merry Christmas.

I don't know - where is Alana?

And Kirk goes, "Excuse me, Miss,

but you're having a costume malfunction."

And I look, and I'd tucked my skirt into my underpants!

And he was the only one brave enough to say anything.

Kirk's here with lunch.

Great. I'll be in in a minute.

A few days later, I ran into Kirk.

And it could have been awkward.

But he comes right up to me and says,

"I once gave an entire presentation

with my fly unzipped."

And then, he says, "I really hope I haven't blown it,

because after we get to know each other a little better,

I'm gonna ask you to marry me."

OK, now I'm in love with him.

I wish I could just snap my fingers and be married -

without the whole big church, fancy gown, 300 guests.

Do you guys even know 300 people?

Mommy and Daddy are paying for this.

How am I supposed to tell them who to invite?

Um, "Mom, Dad...

Kirk and I would really prefer a more intimate ceremony."

Can't do that.

Of course you can.

Lahnie, you know if you and Kirk really want to

just snap your fingers and be married,

you can do that.

But I wanted to know about your wedding.

Well, Richard and I were hippies...

Yeah, well this was pre-bidding war.

In fact, when Meryl and I were young, we didn't have anything.

We got married in a field of wildflowers.

Yeah, I got stung by a bee.

- You did not. - I did too.

And my friend, Brice,

played the acoustic guitar and sang folk songs.

And Richard had a ponytail.

Daddy was a dreamboat.

And Meryl wore this beautiful blue peasant shirt,

that was just...

Well, trust me, she... You were beautiful, sweetheart.

And we wore beads.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah, a lot of beads.

- I thought you looked fierce. - I don't remember that.

That reminds me of a joke.

- Ohhhh. - OK, so...

A guy walks into the doctor's office,

and the doctor says, "I got some bad news and worse news."

And the guys says, "Well, God, that's awful.

Well, give me the bad news first."

And the doctor says, "OK, well, the bad news is,

you've got cancer; you'll be dead in five years."

And guys says, "Well, Jesus Christ!

What's the worse news?"

And the doctor says, "You've got Alzheimer's."

The guy looks at the doctor for a second and he says,

"Well, at least I don't have cancer."

Excuse me.

OK, that was bad.

Hey, Kirk, take a walk with me.

So, remember how you and Alana

wanted an intimate little wedding?

Yeah, we were going to do it right out here.

Yeah.

What do you think about this?

Boy...

I'm so sorry, Merry.

It was only a joke, it didn't mean anything.

- I'm fine. - You're not fine.

You're about as far from fine as you can be.

Well, I mean, yes, I've got this disease.

But I'm taking the medicine the doctor gave me.

I'm doing the mental exercises.

He says we can do something about this -

you know, to slow it down.

It's not all happening at once. I'm not...

I'm still here... Really.

I'm just so afraid that you're gonna forget.

Forget what?

Everything.

But, you know...

if there's one thing you won't forget,

it's your daughter's wedding.

We are going to make that day

so big, so beautiful, so special...

that no one will ever forget it.

Tessa Quince... My card.

Thank you so much for coming out today.

My pleasure.

Now, since you'll be having a June wedding,

for appetizers, I would recommend...

That reminds me.

I read this article, and it had something

that sounded so fabulous. Here it is.

Seared scallops with orange and jalapeño vinaigrette.

What about a salad?

Because you wanted something simple, right?

How about the seared scallops on a bed of endive?

Or just a simple salad.

I kind of like Caesar's salad.

And exactly how many of you are getting married, again?

Hey, Dad, I think you better run to the store.

We're running a little low on lights.

Well, your mother had a concept last year.

We may have overdone it a bit.

Here.

Hey, Gavin...

Did you see that caterer?

Yeah, a little... tightly wound.

You think?

- Instant resume. - What?

Instant resume.

You just sort of make up stuff about somebody you don't know.

Or you could do it about somebody you do know.

Like, um, Paul.

Sure.

So my instant resume would be something like, drunk.

Blackout drunk with adoption issues.

A real work in progress.

True.

Favorite food, pizza.

- Cries at sunsets. - Really?

Not all of them.

I get the idea.

So now we do one for Tessa.

Like, favorite piece of clothing?

Gray pants suit.

Chastity belt!

Thigh-high, black stiletto boots.

No... Dominatrix?

OK, you're excellent at this game.

Tessa's favorite expression?

"I did not say you could touch me there."

"I'll give you something to cry about."

"There are no safe words with me."

So, Gavin seems nice.

Yeah, yeah.

How long have you guys been together?

Since, fall... Autumn, autumn.

You've been seeing each other for, like, months?

Why didn't you tell me?

My God... What did he say when

that weird guy tried to pick you up

from the drug store last week?

Do you remember him?

Yeah, no, I I...

I didn't, um, he... He didn't...

He thought it was so funny.

I'm going to get back to the...

We'll talk about this later.

So, if I understand you correctly,

you would like a simple wedding...

Chrysanthemums...

daisies...

orchids...

daffodils...

calla lilies, and dahlias...

tulips...

and roses.

Ecuadorian roses.

Excellent suggestion.

Let me show you...

You know, I love you,

and I can't wait to get married to you, right?

Well, I can't wait to get married to you, either.

And you know that it doesn't matter to me what I'm wearing,

or the flowers, or the food...

It doesn't matter what you're wearing?

Stop, stop. I'm serious, listen.

I guess what I'm asking is...

What I'm wondering is...

What happened to your little dream

of being married down here by the water. You know?

Just us, and parents, and a few friends,

and strings of lights

and Amazing Grace at sunset and all that?

Well, that changed.

- Can I ask you a question? - Of course.

If your father weren't sick,

we'd be planning a small ceremony, right?

Your perfect little wedding?

I think everything looks pretty good.

Don't you think?

Yeah. I think it's our best year yet.

You know, I think the men should all wear tuxedos.

Because there's nothing more handsome than a man in a tuxedo.

God, this family loves charades.

Can you come out for a second?

Just pretend like you're still working...

OK.

You know, I actually think last year, at Christmas,

this was all I wore.

So, can you help us?

Sure. Do you think we can get everything done in time?

I hope so.

I really want to be ready, just in case.

We've gotta hurry; sunset's in two hours.

I love having this much help this year.

It's fabulous.

Anything for you, Mom.

Yeah, it's great having you help out here.

Come outside for a second, OK?

OK.

Looking good, man.

What's going on?

Paul and I were talking, and we know what.

Alana's perfect wedding would look like.

And it doesn't have tuxedos, or 300 guests under a tent,

and a covered walkway.

So I've decided I'm going to ask her to marry me.

You already asked her.

He means ask her to marry him tonight.

Wow. What can I do to help?

We need flowers, and I need a ride over to the nursery.

You got it.

- Go! - Take my truck.

You really think Alana's gonna want to do this right now?

I don't know.

I just want her to know that we can do what she wants.

Hi, everyone!

What's happening?

Merry?

Can you, um...

I need to ask you a question.

OK.

I know you're planning this June wedding for Alana,

and I just wanted to know if, um...

if you...

Are you sure this is what Alana wants?

Of course it is.

I mean, we've been talking about this

for I don't know how long.

Is it possible you've been talking about it

since I got diagnosed with early-onset?

I don't know. I suppose it's possible.

And you know how Alana's always wanted a big wedding,

and a reception in the backyard?

Of course, that's exactly why we're doing this.

I think that was when she was a teenager.

♪

Come on!

So, do you have any experience with weddings?

Well, I was ring bearer for my cousin Jill.

I was five.

Wore a powder blue tux.

- Very hot. - I bet you were.

But I was actually wondering if you ever wrote anything

for a wedding ceremony.

You know, like, vows?

Yeah.

Kirk was worried about the vows, and I kind of told him

you were a great writer, so I volunteered us to help.

We're... We're writing the vows?

What do you mean?

I mean, I think Alana wanted a big wedding,

when she was a teenager.

I don't think she wants one any more.

Well, then why didn't she say something?

Why would she spend this entire holiday

planning a big wedding if she doesn't want one?

Because she thinks you want one.

So that when the disease starts to affect me...

it will be easier for me to remember.

I need you to understand something.

What?

They haven't invented a disease that will make me forget you,

or Paul...

or Alana... or how much I love all of you.

Maybe my body will stop working,

maybe even my mind, but my heart...

That's... where...

Alzheimer's isn't gonna touch my heart.

I'm just so afraid.

Me too.

But even though I've got this disease,

and even though we're both afraid,

you know what we have right now?

What?

We have right now.

Not Christmas Past, not Christmas Future -

Christmas Present.

And right now,

I think Christmas Present seems pretty good.

How about you?

I think so too.

I was hoping you'd say that.

♪

I got a good one.

When are we supposed to write the vows?

I was thinking we could write something

on the way back home?

Good.

That way we'll have plenty of time.

Come on.

I was thinking we could write something about

marriage being a lot like, walking on a path, you know?

That's the way I think of my parents.

Walking through life, side by side.

That's a nice image. What else have you got?

Can I come in?

Yeah.

Do you remember what we were doing exactly three months ago?

Three months - what was that?

September 24th?

Of course.

We were getting engaged.

Let me see this thing.

- Hey! - I just want to see it.

I will give it back, I promise.

There's something I've been meaning to ask you

since we talked earlier.

OK.

Because, after we talked, it reminded me of a conversation

we had a couple of days after we got engaged.

About our wedding.

Our perfect wedding.

♪

How did you do this?

I wrote what I'd want for my wedding.

You... like it?

Like it? I love it.

I can't...

Where did Roy find you, man?

Kirk, we did this already.

I know, but I want a do-over.

A do-over?

Yeah, I want to ask you again, OK?

All right, but I'm telling you right now,

my answer's gonna be the same.

I hope so.

Alana Fowler, will you marry me tonight?

What?

Will you have the perfect wedding with me, right now,

on Christmas Eve, at sunset?

We are not ready to get married right now.

My parents are on the way over,

my father can perform the ceremony.

But we aren't ready.

Come on.

Come here, I want to show you something.

♪

Now if I remember right,

we were talking about something like this.

You remember right.

So, will you marry me tonight?

But my parents...

Are just hoping they're invited.

Of course you're invited!

So is this a yes?

That is a yes!

Hey!

♪

I get really nervous when I do this,

unless I have someone to look at.

Will you watch me when I sing?

You know, when I woke up this morning,

I didn't think I could be any happier than I was.

Christmas Eve with my beautiful family and friends.

And?

And I was wrong.

Are you ready?

Let's do it.

♪ Amazing grace

♪ How sweet the sound

♪ That saved a wretch like me... ♪

Are you crying?

I hate you.

♪ ...Was blind but now I see ♪

My friends - or should I say family -

Kirk and Alana have done something truly wonderful here.

They have reminded us of what a wedding really is:

simply a celebration of the commitment and the love

that these two young people share.

We are thrilled to be here.

I understand that you will be reading vows.

Kirk, my promise to you is this...

Are you crying?

When you walk, I will walk beside you.

When you stumble, I will lift you up.

And when the sun goes down and you rest in the evening,

I will comfort you in the darkness.

For the song of your love rings in my heart,

and I am yours - forever.

♪ ♪

OK, great.

Can I get a picture of you three?

Get really close together.

Wonderful.

Thank you, guys.

Can I get you and Vicki?

One, two, three, smile! Perfect!

Thanks, you guys.

So, you seem to be hitting it off with Zack.

Yeah, he's nice.

What exactly did you say to him before the wedding?

What?

You heard me.

I just asked him for some help.

Did you tell him you get nervous when you sing?

So? I do get nervous.

OK, sometimes I get a little nervous.

Fine. He's cute.

And I like it when cute guys watch me when I sing.

I can't help it.

I love you.

♪

♪ Christmas time

♪ Christmas time is here

♪ So celebrate

♪ How living is so dear

♪ When we got love, love, love ♪

♪ We got love

♪ Yeah, we got love, love, love ♪

♪ We got love

♪ Just hang your wish

♪ Upon the tree

♪ Come on angel

♪ Dance with me

♪

You sounded beautiful out there.

Thanks.

- Do you sing professional? - No.

♪

You guys should join them.

No, this one's for married couples only.

You realize that you've just hosted the perfect wedding?

Pizza and Chinese food at my daughter's wedding -

it's a complete disaster.

Amazing.

You got Roy one of his crazy games.

I... um...

I didn't know how complicated the instructions were gonna be.

And part of the gift is playing it with him,

but, holy crap.

Each player's army consists of five trolls, eight elves,

eleven warriors, two gnomes, an aardvark, two werewolves,

and a monarch.

If the expansion pack is used,

power zerts are distributed and...

What's a power zert?

You must... You must really love him.

Power zerts...

It says here there are 96

to be distributed between the players.

Let's start with that.

Thank you, sir.

You know, we never did an instant resume for you.

You're right.

So let me begin.

College graduate, English major.

Not too tough, considering I wrote a book.

OK, we can dig a little deeper.

Let's see... Favorite piece of clothing:

your father's polyester disco shirt, circa 1975.

Woo!

Not really.

My dad partied alone at the local bar

before he came home every night.

He was an alcoholic.

Was?

Yeah. He, um, died three years ago.

I'm sorry.

No, no, no, no, it's OK.

He got sober before he died,

and we caught up on a lot we missed

when he was drinking.

Anyway, I know a lot about the work you're doing -

you know, in AA?

And I... I really admire, and I...

Well, I'm... I'm really impressed.

Wow...

That was kind of heavy.

Want to, um... Want to get back to the resume?

Sure.

How about guilty pleasures?

Oooh, yes, I can work with this.

Ummm...

Chocolate chip waffles and ice cream for dinner.

Wow.

I thought you were gonna go for guilty...

musical pleasures.

OK. Sure.

No problem. The Partridge Family.

No, no.

Abba.

No way.

Way.

- Wait, are you... Really? - Yeah.

First kiss: Curt Lombardi, freshman year in high school.

Fernando was playing on the radio.

Wow.

Next topic.

Hopes and dreams.

You know, things to do before you die.

Actually, I'm taking care of one of my dreams in January.

I'm going to California.

Really?

Yeah. I, um...

I got this job translating for a deaf teacher

at a college in Berkeley, and, um...

Well, I'm gonna be living out west for a while.

My God, that's...

You're going to California.

I had no idea.

Yeah, I'll... I'll be there until June.

You're gonna be gone six months?

What does, um...

What does Roy think about all this?

He...

This was on the radar when we got back together again,

so he's on board.

Six months in California...

I'm almost afraid to ask

about the rest of your hopes and dreams.

You know - get married, have a family, the usual.

Hey, me too.

Although I hear adopted children can be a real handful.

I don't know. I've met a few... and I like them.

How about you?

What do you want to do before you die?

I'm still learning how to live moment to moment - you know?

Not dwelling on how I screwed up the past,

not worrying about if I'm going to screw up my future.

I'm just trying very hard to focus on today.

So I guess, for me...

I'm just trying to find a good guy to spend my todays with.

You know...

Someone to walk beside me.

My God, I can't.

- No. - I can't.

This isn't... Man, I can't do this.

I can't do this. I'm sorry.

- Paul... - I'm so sorry.

Merry Christmas, everybody.

Merry Christmas!

Hey, has anybody seen Paul?

He's outside with Zack.

How about Gavin?

I think he's still asleep. He was up late.

Watching the Christmas Eve service

from the Vatican, no doubt.

Something like that.

Is there extra coffee?

I'm gonna wake up Gavin because I want to open presents.

And then I kissed him...

I fucking kissed him.

How could I be such a self-absorbed jerk?

And what did Gavin do?

You mean after I kissed him like a gigantic shithead?

Yeah.

I don't know what he said. He was saying something.

I was just stammering out an apology,

and then I ran away.

And I know that AA tells us that anger is the dubious luxury

of the normal man, and I can't afford to be angry,

because I'm an alcoholic.

I'm just so angry at myself right now,

I don't know what to do.

I can't be that guy any more -

the guy who just breaks up relationships because

he thinks someone's cute, or nice, or whatever.

So what are you gonna do?

I don't know.

I guess I'm going to apologize to Gavin...

make sure he knows that the last thing I want to do

is come between him and Roy.

Jesus, that's the last thing I want to do.

So, how did you and Gavin meet?

Well...

We went out after high school, and...

Alana isn't around, is she?

What? No.

Good.

I really need to tell somebody this.

Gavin?

Gavin, are you awake?

Merry Christmas, Gavin. It's time to wake up.

I couldn't face Paul alone.

I totally understand why you'd be nervous.

But he's really changed.

He's acting completely different than his old asshole self.

I'm acting exactly like my old asshole self!

Well, not exactly.

What do you mean?

Well, what would your old asshole self

have done last night?

Kissed Gavin, which is exactly what I did.

No, after that.

Well, I would have kept kissing him.

And then?

And then I would have slept with him.

You didn't do that, did you?

No.

So, what about Gavin?

What do you mean?

Well, what do you think about him?

Well, I think he's...

I know I just met him,

but I think we might be great together.

I mean, I felt this connection between us when we were talking.

And?

And he's with Roy.

And?

So whether I felt a connection or not...

I'm walking away.

Hey, Roy.

Hey.

I just tried to wake up Gavin.

And?

And he's gone, his suitcase, his clothes, everything.

I liked Gavin.

I know. He was really nice.

Hey, did you see this?

"Dear Roy:

I'm sorry I had to leave so suddenly.

Something came up and it's complicated.

I have to leave for California soon anyway,

and I found a really cheap flight online.

It leaves tonight, so I'm catching the bus home.

Please tell everyone thank you

for welcoming me into the family.

It was the best Christmas I ever had.

Love, Gavin Greene.

P.S.

No matter what Paul might say,

it was my fault entirely.

He did nothing wrong.

And for what it's worth,

"I think you'd be really great together."

What the hell does that mean?

What did Paul do?

What's going on?

Gavin disappeared.

He must've left early this morning.

What?

He said he was going to California.

So what happened?

Last night...

we were up late,

reading the directions to this game

that Gavin got for you.

And...

We were talking about making plans for the future,

and that kind of stuff,

and I...

Well, I... I kissed him.

But that was it, man.

It was completely my fault, Roy.

Jesus, I'm so sorry.

So, do you want to get back together with Paul?

What?

What?

No.

I'm... I'm sorry...

But no!

So then, are you going to tell Paul?

Tell me what?

I'm...

I'm so sorry.

Gavin was just pretending to be my boyfriend.

I asked him to so that you wouldn't think

I was a pathetic loser for still being single after,

you know, what happened between us.

My God.

You were never a loser, Roy.

It was always me. And it still is, isn't it?

I mean, I kissed Gavin,

even though I thought he was your boyfriend.

And then you stopped, before anything happened,

and you walked away.

So I did the right thing?

Yeah, after you did the wrong thing.

I've been there.

You...

You actually like Gavin?

I do.

So is that it?

What do you mean?

You're just gonna let him leave?

What was the line you liked from Gavin's book?

Fear not your destiny, for you have shaped it well.

So you're saying I should go after him?

Duh.

I should go after him.

I'm going after him.

Wait...

I can't drive.

- I'll drive. - I'll drive.

Shotgun!

Come on. Let's go, get up!

I got the keys!

OK, let's go, everybody!

Does anybody know how to get to the bus station?

I think it's down near the grocery store.

No, they moved it! Didn't they?

His phone goes right to voicemail!

Go, Mom, we'll figure it out!

I'm pretty sure it's by the grocery store.

Are we completely confident he's at the bus station?

My God.

That must have been one hell of a kiss.

- This reminds me of a joke. - Not now, Dad.

♪

Merry Christmas.

What are you doing here?

I needed to tell you something.

I know Roy really isn't your boyfriend.

How did you find out?

I spoke to him this morning.

He's still in love with you, right?

That's not what he told me.

What?

Roy's not in love with me.

Then he's... crazy.

Well, I think Roy's crazy

because he's not in love with you.

- Want to sit down? - Yeah.

So, um...

I came to, tell you two things.

The first one's a little embarrassing.

There was a time when I was drinking...

what happened last night

would have happened because you had a boyfriend.

But last night was different.

I didn't want...

What happened last night

happened despite the fact you had a boyfriend.

I mean, despite the fact that I thought you had a boyfriend.

If I had the courage to say it, I would have told you

what I thought of you as soon as I got to know you...

That Roy is a lucky man,

and I wish that I had met you

before you got together with him.

- But we aren't... - I know, I know.

And that's why I have this other thing to tell you.

I came to try to convince you to take a later flight...

because I want you to spend Christmas with me.

And I really hope I haven't blown it,

because...

Once we get to know each other a little better...

I'm going to ask you to marry me.

♪

♪

♪ Seems I met you at the perfect time ♪

♪ My door was open wide

♪ But if that day played out another way ♪

♪ You might never be inside

♪ It's crazy how the tiniest things ♪

♪ Can lead me down a different string ♪

♪ That's why I'm lucky that I'm with you ♪

♪ And how I know it's true

♪ That I belong with you forever ♪

♪ No matter what's in store

♪ As long as we can stay together ♪

♪ We'll be better than before

♪ And I belong with you forever ♪

♪ No matter where we go

♪ As long as we can stay together ♪

♪ We'll never be alone

♪

♪ Did I meet you at the perfect time? ♪

♪ Or was it meant to be?

♪ They say that timing is everything ♪

♪ But I don't know what I believe ♪

♪ 'Cause if I didn't meet you on that day ♪

♪ Would I still end up with you anyway? ♪

♪ I guess what I'm trying to say ♪

♪ Is you're supposed to be...

♪ With me

♪