Original subtitles

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Hello and welcome to QI.

Tonight we're in topsy-turvy turmoil

as we tackle thrills and spills.

And here to spill the beans are the thrilling Nish Kumar...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

..the titillating Suzi Ruffell...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

..the tantalising Mark Steel...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

..and, tickle my fancy, it's Alan Davies.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right, please keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle

at all times as Nish goes...

SYNTH VOICE: # Down and up and down and up and down and up and down... # LAUGHTER

..Suzi goes...

STEADY POP BEAT PLAYS # Up. And down Up. And down

# Up. And down Up. And down... #

LAUGHTER ..Mark goes...

MUSIC: Upside Down by Diana Ross # I said upside down You're turning me

# You're giving love Instinctively... #

LAUGHTER ..Alan goes...

MUSIC: Dizzy by Tommy Roe # You're making me dizzy... #

RETCHING SPLATTERING

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

Right, then. Question one.

LAUGHTER

Which is the most thrilling part of a theme park?

Well, when you don't die, isn't it?

Yeah. I never die, as I only ever do the thing

with the hook and get the duck with the number on it.

Is that because you're not tall enough for the rides?

Yes.

I can't imagine why people are thrilled at all.

The thrill for me would just be driving past it.

We're talking about roller-coasters,

and your thrill level over the course of a roller-coaster

reaches its peak moment

when you're first strapped into the seat.

Oh. So really you could just get out then. Really?

Yes, that's the moment. It's all over at that point.

It's the thrill of anticipation. It's that moment when you think... SANDI GASPS

Have you been on The Big One, Sandi? I beg your pardon?

There's a massive one in Blackpool.

About 20 years ago I was filming something in Manchester

and I tried to get some people to come from the local crew

and none of them would come. And that should have told me something.

It's absolutely terrifying. And you think you're going to die.

You're absolutely certain you're going to die.

It feels like, well, one day there'll be the final ride.

Yeah. Why not this one?

You go over it and the kid next to me

who's been on it loads of times,

when we went down about the fifth bend, he said

he'd tell me when to smile and he went, "Now!"

And we went like that and then the thing went flash!

And I've got a keyring of me...

I've never seen him since, of course.

Me and this lad who was about 14,

going, "Ah!"

NISH: You have given someone an anecdote for their entire lives

that they've been dining out on since that,

because there's a 14-year-old boy who presumably now

is, like, in his, like, late 20s, early 30s, who's like,

"I've got a key ring with me and Jonathan Creek."

Either that or he's watching this now, going,

"That's the bloke from the roller-coaster!"

No, "That's the bloke from my keyring!"

"That's weird. What's he doing on there?!"

But there's a guy called Professor Brendan Walker

at Middlesex University, he's the world's only thrill engineer,

and he has done studies about what people's responses are

to these huge vertical drops. So he measures them.

And the level of excitement when you're on the ride

is only ever about 80% of the peak that you hit

when you put the seatbelt on. Two things he was looking for

is looking for level of arousal and level of pleasure.

And apparently - and I think we all know this -

not always the same thing.

So they... I'm like that in a baker's.

So true, isn't it?

You just think, "Ooh!"

You never like a nice slice more than when you first see it. Yeah.

Yeah. There's one at Alton Towers, isn't there,

where you go along in a kind of wide sort of car

and then it stops and you think, "Oh..."

There's no track in front of you,

and then it tips you forward

and then it hangs you over a hole. Yeah.

Oblivion. Oblivion. Hangs you over a hole. Yeah.

And if you sit in the cafe, which is nearby,

and you can see the thing go and tip and then you hear...

ALAN SCREAMS

So you're having your lunch and about every three minutes...

ALAN SCREAMS Just down into the hole.

Well, this guy who is the thrill engineer,

he worked out that the calorific value expended

on a roller-coaster ride due to, you know,

you've got an increased heart rate and you're sweating and so on,

is equivalent to a single chip shop chip.

Oh. I was hoping you were going to say, like,

a spin class. Yeah... I could've been like,

"Let's cut the record. Let's get to Alton Towers."

Let's go straight to EuroDisney.

I remember taking my children to Disney

and my four-year-old met Pluto.

Now, Pluto is played by a 6ft tall man, OK?

And there's a mesh... What?! Well... He's not...?

Oh. Huh?! It's not a talking dog?

Well, there's a mesh where you can see his face.

He's 6ft tall and he comes over and he talks to my daughter.

She pats him like that.

And then she said as he left, she said, "That's not a real dog."

And I said... "How could you tell?"

She said, "His nose wasn't wet."

LAUGHTER APPLAUSE

When I was at school and Mr Blobby was at his heyday...

Ah. Those were the days, eh?

..one of my friends had a little brother

and for his birthday his dad dressed up as Mr Blobby,

had the mesh thing, but it was in his mouth,

and the little boy lost his shit and was like...

SUZI GASPS "Blobby's eaten Dad!"

A quick supplementary question.

Why might it be good to go on a ride with a lot of jerks?

Ooh. Is it because a bit of the point, a bit of the seat

goes up your butt and that feels nice?

I'm going to go with that's a personal fantasy, Nish.

There are roller-coaster architects,

and speed is not necessarily the thing.

Acceleration is more important, but it's the changes of speed.

Cos it makes your heart go... Yeah, absolutely.

So if it accelerates and then suddenly accelerates a bit more,

that's called a jerk. And that apparently is the thing

that makes you even more kind of...upset.

I was on the Ghost Train once and it went wrong, it actually broke down,

almost as if it was run by Southern Rail, and...

Yeah, "There will be a skeleton replacement service..."

And...

And the bloke did come through, "Yeah, sorry, er...

SNIFFS "Er, yeah, you'll all have to get out."

And we had to just walk through and push the doors open and then,

"Who-hoo-hoo!" and all, just walking through.

It's not quite the same, is it? It wasn't quite the same, no.

I was once on a ghost walk thing with my dad,

and there were all these, there were all these pictures of,

like, famous serial killers around this, like, haunted house.

And then we got to the one with the guy in the Scream mask,

and he flinched, and it wasn't a picture.

And then the guy climbed out of the picture frame

and my dad ran,

kicked open the emergency exit...

Just like...

SUZI VOCALISES DOOR BASHING Like that.

And we found him in the gift shop.

Did he not even take you with him?

No! Gone? Just gone?

Aww... He was like, "I'm going to start a new life."

You're always safe in a gift shop. They never go in the gift shop.

The best bit of a roller-coaster is the beginning,

and it's all downhill from there.

AUDIENCE GROANS LAUGHTER

Describe a really dangerous trumpet, please.

Is it going to be an instrument trumpet

or is it going to be a trumpet flower

or a trumpet frog or something? Yes. It's a flower.

Absolutely right. Oh... A lethal one?

A lethal flower. Yeah, if you eat any of it, you're a goner.

Do you know about this?

I've heard of them. They're quite pretty to look at.

Very pretty. It's called the Angel's Trumpet.

It's a flower that's native to Central and South America.

Oh, look at it. It's stunning. Isn't it pretty? It's deadly.

I mean, it's a beautiful...

Go out the fire exit, Suze!

Go to the gift shop! Run! Run for your life!

Imagine him at Kew Gardens.

There is a place in Alnwick in Northumberland...

Yep. The Poison Garden in Alnwick.

The Poison Garden! Oh, it's a magnificent place.

And there's this marvellously sort of officious woman

who takes you around.

And she's one of these sort of guides -

"Right. Now, assemble here. Whatever you do,

don't do anything unless I tell you to do it

because if you touch something and it's poisonous,

then you'll end up dead and it will jolly well be your own fault, OK?

I would recommend it. Definitely. The Poison Garden.

Well, so, the owner of the Poison Garden in Alnwick Castle

has described this particular flower as "an amazing aphrodisiac,

"before it kills you." Wow!

And there were Victorian women who would keep Angel's trumpets

and they would tip a little bit of the pollen into their tea,

it would induce a sort of LSD kind of trip,

even though it was rather risky. And those who did take it,

who died, before they died,

they possibly succumbed first of all to sexual excitement,

then restlessness, then overtalkative,

then aggressive behaviour, convulsive sobbing, psychosis,

intense dream experiences.

Like Glastonbury, isn't it?

There's a story about a young man who amputated his own tongue

and penis after drinking just one cup of tea

infused with Angel's trumpet. What? Oh...

Did the tongue, and not content with that...

I know! Went for something bigger -

or presumably bigger. I wouldn't know.

Now, why is it a good idea

to make a pensioner walk the tightrope?

To cut state spending.

APPLAUSE

New scheme based on the Squid Game.

And, you know, they've had it easy, haven't they, for too long?

But genuinely, it is a medical thing.

And why might it be good for pensioners?

NISH: Helping their balance?

So, it's a really good way to detect early muscle degradation.

Is the way that you detect it them falling to their death?

Yeah, I think.

Come on, Grandma!

Yeah, "Oh... Yeah. Muscle degradation." Yeah.

God, that's the 15th today!

If you think about tightrope walking, so it involves

much more muscle control, coordination and strength

than walking on solid ground,

so it can reveal potential issues that ordinary walking can't.

Now, clearly, what you do is

you don't do it very high up.

But by doing this, geriatric health care professionals

can check and see whether they're unsteady in any way.

In fact, they use a thing called a force plate.

It has the same sort of effect as walking on a tightrope.

But one of the best things you can do to ward off dementia,

not the top thing, but one of the things you can do

is to work on your balance. And so it's recommended that

while you're brushing your teeth, you stand on one leg

and it just keeps reminding you to keep your balance at all times.

Does it work with other circus things, like lion taming?

Yeah, lion taming... Lion taming, juggling...

But here is a sort of strange thing.

So there is a village called Tsovkra in Dagestan

and every able-bodied person in this village

can walk the tightrope.

So that is curious, isn't it? What? Yeah, every single one.

It's about a 100-year-old tradition

and nobody's really sure how it started.

It's rumoured that it was a shortcut so that villagers could

go and court potential lovers on the other side of a ravine.

Always a motivation.

Yes, that'll do it. Yeah.

"We're going to the other side of the ravine."

"How are we getting there?

Yeah.

"Don't worry. I've got a real horn on,

"so I won't need the big stick."

Every single one of the village's children

study tightrope walking at school.

It's a whole village that can tightrope walk. What?!

Is it anything to do with altitude?

No, it's just literally trying to get about.

I think cos they're on top of a hill, they think,

"How're we gonna get down from here? Oh, I know."

Haven't they heard about roly-polys?

There's another village in Turkmenistan

where they all do roly-polys.

Grade 3... They go to the next village... Yep?

..and there's a bridge.

They're all like, "Oh..."

"What d'you call that?" "It's a bridge!"

"Bloody hell. That's a brilliant idea."

Right. Moving on...

You've all got beside you a loo-roll holder like this.

I want you to put it on your right-hand side,

imagine you're sitting on the lavatory,

and I want you to tell me which way do you correctly hang the loo roll?

Do you hang it this way - very controversial -

or do you hang it...? So, imagine the wall is here, OK?

Oh... Do you hang it? NISH: You gotta hang it this way.

Why? Why have you got to hang it that way?

Just because, like, otherwise

you're a godless prick.

APPLAUSE

That'd be a fantastic religion, Nish.

The only commandment, "Thou shalt hang the toilet paper

"down from the left-hand side."

So, the toilet-roll holder was invented by an American engineer

called Seth Wheeler in 1891.

And you can see from his patent that he has made a decision

and it goes this way.

The truth is, there are advantages to both ways of doing it.

So if the loose end hangs in the front, it's easier to grab.

But if you hang it the other way around, there is less chance of,

I don't know, a child or a cat or indeed yourself

accidentally unravelling the roll.

I always used to think it should be at the back,

and then in recent years I've changed. I've gone front.

You've gone to the front? Yeah. Well, what you could've done

is you could've installed something called a Tilt-A-Roll. Oh, yeah?

A Tilt-A-Roll was invented in 1999 and the holder swivels,

and you can orientate the paper as you please.

Wow.

I have, I have a toilet-roll butler.

Just...

Just stands there, and let him just hand me, you know...

Give you a little sheet. "From your expression, sir,

"I would say that's four sheets that you'll be wanting."

I've got a doubler with a magazine rack underneath.

Wow. That's horrible. That's Jonathan Creek money.

SUZI: Yeah.

'90s, innit?

Cha-ching.

People actually think... I've got a bidet in my house

and people say that you're posh.

Like it's some sort of... Washing your arse is posh?

..act of social climbing.

Sometimes paper just won't do it. No!

Won't shift it.

Here he is. Jonathan CRACK.

APPLAUSE

You need some hot, soapy water.

Have you tried those Japanese toilets that wash your arse for you?

Oh, my... Oh! That is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me

in my entire... I saw God the first time I used a Japanese toilet.

It's... Oh, it's...

Oh, God.

Just thinking about it now is giving me a semi.

Is it powerful? It's basically calling a drone strike

on your own hole.

So is it like a jet wash at the garage?

Yeah. Yeah.

And you know how much fun they are. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they are.

Has it got five sort of...

Has it got a cycle of all the foamy stuff...

You can do the heat.

I'll do the Platinum Supreme.

I want my hubcaps buffed.

SUZI: Wax on, wax off. That's what happens.

But I still don't understand, what does it do?

It washes your arse, like, there's a jet of water that comes out

and you can aim it and control the temperature

and control the force of it.

And honestly, I...

You could eat dinner off my arsehole.

Anyway, moving on...

What can you do with 20 tonnes of unwanted hair trimmings?

Make an awful sandwich.

Make wigs?

Well, it's an astonishing story, really.

It's used to clean up oil spills.

What? Yeah.

So the idea came from a hairstylist in Alabama,

a guy called Phil McCrory, and he was watching the news -

I don't know if you can remember the 1989 Exxon Valdez spill -

and he saw how difficult it was for volunteers to clean

the fur of otters that were matted with oil.

And he's watching this and he thought,

if animal fur can trap the oil,

then I wonder if human hair could do the same.

So what he did is he conducted an experiment.

He poured oil, motor oil into his son's paddling pool

and then he stuffed his salon's hair trimmings into his wife's stockings.

And those things that he made, these kind of hair booms,

it's still made the same way today with nylon tights and cable ties.

There they are. It's a fantastic way to clean up oil spills.

It's also a great way to recycle all the hair cuttings.

And in fact, until 2021,

when 550 salons in the UK and Ireland

signed up to donate spare hair

to oil spills, 99% of the cuttings went into landfill,

but now the leftover hair is used to clean up oil.

Do you not think that's so clever? Incredible. Yeah.

It's just brilliant. Now, hair... Someone wants to applaud.

Is it a hairdresser?

APPLAUSE

So here's a supplementary question.

Hair is so good at taking up the oil because it's very...

NISH: Hairy.

Oh, no, it's not absorbent, is it?

That's... Did you say absorbent? KLAXON

No. Ooh. AUDIENCE: Ooh!

OK, it's not ab-sorbent, it's ad-sorbent.

Oh, I'm adsorbent.

What it means, rather than sucking the oil in, it sits on top...

What's the word again? Adsorbent.

Oh, I said that. It's just my accent.

It sits on top of the hair and covers the entire surface area,

rather than being sucked into the hair,

so it doesn't absorb it.

And there's now a charity called Matter Of Trust

and they co-ordinate donations of hair and wool

and so on from salons and pet groomers and farmers.

And they specifically ask only for head hair.

Gonna put that out there.

That's a real shame, cos I'll be honest with you...

..the hair and face is just the beginning.

Oh, really?

I could clean up a few oil spills, if you know what I mean.

Could we keep it on Nish' body and just sort of...

Grab his feet. I'm here, everyone! Relax!

Send some hairy people in -

"Swim! Swim!

"Until you can swim no more."

Right.

You have glasses of water next to you.

I want you to pop your finger in your glass of water

and tell me if it feels wet to you.

Uh-oh. Is this going to make me wee?

What d'you reckon, Mark? Feel wet?

Yeah, it feels wet. Did you say yes?

Yeah. What? KLAXON

Here's the thing.

Human beings can't technically feel wet at all.

Oh... So if you think you are detecting wetness on your skin,

what you're actually feeling is a change in temperature and texture.

Other animals like spiders and insects and so on,

they have hygro receptors, so sensors in the skin

that tells you if something is wet or not. And we don't have that.

If you're blindfolded and you fall in a swimming pool... Yep?

..you'd think...

You'd just think, "Oh, I've landed in a skip full of rubble."

"Oh, my God, it's colder than I expected,

"and therefore it's wet."

It's a perceptual illusion.

You're exactly right. It's a change of temperature and touch,

and we have receptors for that.

We just don't have receptors for saying, "Oh, my goodness, it's wet."

So, you know that thing if you try, I don't know,

to take laundry in on a chilly evening

and the T-shirt is still damp?

Mm-hmm? Yeah. Or is it just cold?

Yes. This is the point. What about when you wee yourself?

I mean, that... That feels wet.

That does feel wet.

No, it feels...

It feels warm.

Some skin receptors are also triggered by menthol,

so the chemical in mint,

and that's why that gives us an illusion of coldness.

So drinking cold water after brushing your teeth, for example,

with minty toothpaste. Yeah, that shower gel with the tea tree in it.

Ooh, yeah. Ooh.

That's like a party for the body, isn't it?

It really is, but sometimes you use a little too much, don't you?

Just don't put that in your bidet.

Woo!

Oh, yeah. You could really ruin someone's Japanese toilet.

Unscrew the top. Little bit of that in there.

ALAN SCREAMS

Nish would love it.

I'd love it. Yeah.

Would that touch God?

You can't feel Wet Wet Wet in your fingers and your toes.

AUDIENCE GROANS

But you can feel if Love Is All Around.

How could you make a trapeze more terrifying?

Put loads of those trumpet flowers underneath it.

That would do it.

Wouldn't it? Or a Japanese toilet?

Yes. Underneath.

So, this is turn of the 20th century.

We're talking about a particular stunt.

So you might choose to strap your trapeze to a hot-air balloon.

What? Yeah.

So the turn of the 20th century, there were stunt performers,

and they combined ballooning, trapezing and parachuting

into a single act.

Right?

They did acrobatics on a trapeze attached to a parachute

hanging from a hot-air balloon thousands of feet in the air.

Then they'd cut loose from the balloon,

still on the trapeze, with the parachute attached

and then hopefully it would open as you came back down to Earth.

Hopefully. Yeah. Well... Was there a sort of little point

where, as you were falling, it went...

..and if you were really clever, you did it at the right time,

you ended up on a keyring?

I have to tell you about this particular stunt.

Fatalities were common.

Not a phrase you want to hear, is it?

It's the same as being a stand-up comic.

But I tell you this to introduce you to a marvellous entertainer

who was called Dolly Shepherd. She was an amazing woman.

She was carrying out a double jump in 1908

when her partner Louie May's parachute failed,

and she was hanging from a trapeze at 11,000 feet

and she swung over to her friend's trapeze,

who was, she was hanging from the same balloon, and grabbed it

and she got Louie to wrap her legs around her.

And they both descended on Dolly's parachute.

And the heavy landing paralysed Dolly,

and they said she would never walk again.

Four months later, she was back skydiving.

I think it's outrageous that WE'RE called entertainers,

and that's what they did.

I just think she's so worth knowing about.

During one jump, she nearly landed on an express train,

but the driver, with some forethought,

puffed the steam on his engine and blew her into a ditch.

Just...puff!

Was she a cartoon?

Yes, she does sound like the Road Runner.

Yeah, yeah. There was another one where she used to run

off the edge of a cliff and dangle her...

And she lived to the age of 96, died in 1983,

and flew with the famous Red Devils Parachute Troop

to celebrate her 90th birthday.

Oh, wow! I just love that. I know. It's just so wonderful.

We should pay tribute to her. Right, after that thrilling ride,

we're crashing back down to terra firma with a round

of General Ignorance. Fingers on buzzers, please.

What do the Germans call those big mugs of beer that they drink from?

SYNTH VOICE: # Down. Up and down. #

Is it a Stein?

KLAXON Yeah.

If you asked a German shopkeeper for a Stein,

they wouldn't really know.

It's what the English call the German beer mugs.

It is not what the Germans call it. Oh. Oh.

They call it Humpen, or Krug.

Easy for you to say.

Yeah.

So Stein means stone, basically,

and it's the ceramic ware that the stuff is made of.

But it's not what they call it.

But a Humpen or a Krug is made from all sorts of materials.

But it has a handle and sometimes a lid.

You don't have to be Ein-stein

to know Germans don't call a beer mug... AUDIENCE GROANS

Don't listen to them, Sandi. I thought it was very good.

I... You lot. Next time, Pointless.

That's where you...

If you're not appreciating this...

APPLAUSE

You don't have to be Einstein to know Germans

don't call a beer mug ein Stein.

20 points if you can tell me the country

where snowboarding was invented.

Oh, well, it's going to be some wacky shit

because that's, this show just loves a,

"Ooh, here's the obvious answer."

IMITATES KLAXON

So I'll say Egypt.

APPLAUSE

Yeah. Down the Pyramids.

No, it's a particular village in Turkey.

It is... What? Turkey?

Yeah. Mesekoy, it's called.

And it's in the Kachar mountains.

OK? There it is on the map.

So, this village used to be called Petran.

And the story goes that there was a boy who was given the job

of cleaning his father's prayer mat

and he realised that if you placed the mat on a snowy slope,

he could glide, and a hobby took off in this particular village.

What? The problem was he crashed into a bloke on a tightrope.

But the Petran board has got a string on the front to help

with steering and balance and they'd mould the wood

using the steam from a kettle

and then they'd put cow fat on the bottom.

And apparently it's fantastic.

The only thing is it's sort of dying out

because the kids of the village now don't think it's cool.

Wow. They're not really doing it any more.

It's SNOW joke...

AUDIENCE GROANS LAUGHTER

Snowboarding was originally a Turkish delight.

Er...

AUDIENCE GROANS

No, no, you're trying to build up your part now.

OK.

When did almond milk become so bloody popular?

When we found their nipples.

APPLAUSE

Oh, it's either going to be 2015, or the year 2000 BC.

Which are we going to go for?

Is it a recent thing or is it an old thing?

Really old. It is really old. It's gonna be really old. Well old.

We have been replacing dairy with almond milk

since at least the 12th century. What?! I was going to say that.

12th century, would've been my guess.

At least the 12th century. Yeah...

Aww... Some poor sod, when it first happened.

"Cor, a cup of tea, please,"

in 1183. Yeah.

"What sort of milk do you want?"

"Oh, I don't know."

"Well, do you want coconut milk?

"Sheep milk?

"Ewe milk? Iguana milk.

"Llama milk. "Milk expressed by Sandra,

"who sits in the back office squirting it..."

You have full fat in the morning, semi-skimmed in the afternoon.

Milk! Milk!

But it's the 12th century now. We've got this.

Well, here's the thing. There are food historians who say

it was the single most important ingredient

in medieval European cookery.

So one of the reasons for it is that cow's milk,

often very unappetizing.

You have to imagine, it's pre-pasteurization days

and apparently you could pull strings of bacteria

and clumps of earth from your glass,

and you couldn't eat animal products on various fast days.

So almond milk, absolutely perfect.

And almonds, of course, the world's oldest domesticated tree.

We think human beings started cultivating them to eat

somewhere around 9000 BC. I mean, it's amazing.

That's what I thought, 9000 BC. Yep.

I should have asked you first.

Can I just say, if you see almonds in the wild, do not eat them.

They're bitter and toxic.

There's enough cyanide in them to kill a child.

I mean, don't do that either. Don't, don't...

There's cyanide in apple pips.

Yeah. The Poison Garden woman, this was part of her...

Part of her thing.

She said, "Look at that, look at that, apples.

"They look innocent enough, don't you? But just a few pips

"and that could absolutely wipe someone out.

"How many pips do you think you would need to give somebody

"enough cyanide to kill them?"

And a woman put up her hand and went, "I reckon it's 50."

And she said, "You know, you're absolutely right.

"How did you know that?" And she said,

"Well, I tried 49 on me husband and it didn't quite work."

All of which ancient nuttiness

brings us to the real kernel of the show.

It's time to reveal the scores.

Ooh.

Thrashing the competition

with -2...

..today's winner is Mark!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Winner?

Try being in second place with -5,

Suzi!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

In third place with -15 -

and this has surprised me -

it's Nish!

Yes! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Which means in last place,

crying over spilled almond milk,

with -17, it's Alan!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And it's thanks to Nish, Mark, Suzi and Alan,

and I leave you with this from Irish thriller writer

and former Marine Victor O'Reilly.

"If at first you don't succeed,

"well, so much for skydiving." Goodnight.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE