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MAN [CHUCKLING]: Okay. Right about there. I think that's it.
[WOMAN CHUCKLlNG]
WOMAN: l can't believe we actually bought this thing.
There's a reason charity auctions have an open bar.
Don't you think, I don't know, it's kind of creepy?
It's okay. I'll keep you safe.
[LAUGHlNG]
Maybe you're the one I ought to be scared of?
Mm.
-Let's go upstairs. -Give me two minutes to lock up.
[WOMAN MOANS]
Make that one minute.
[SHRIEKS]
[LAUGHlNG]
[CREAKING]
[BEEPlNG]
[THUDDlNG]
If you don't hurry up I'm gonna start without you.
MAN: Babe, get the lights. I can't see a thing.
[SQUELCHlNG]
You spill something?
Ann?
Ann? Ann!
[SCREAMS]
[ROCK MUSlC PLAYS OVER SPEAKERS]
[CHATTERlNG]
WOMAN: Seven, four, two, zero. -Seven, four, two, zero.
All right, you're in there. Perfect.
Is "Brandy" with a Y or an I?
[DEAN LAUGHING]
All right, listen, l gotta go. Hold that thought. l'll be right back, okay?
-All right. So l think I got something. -Yeah, me too.
I think we need to take a little shore leave, just a little bit.
What do you think, huh? I'm so in the door with this one.
So, what are we today, Dean? Are we rock stars? Are we Army Rangers?
Reality-TV scouts looking for people with special skills.
[LAUGHlNG]
I mean, hey, it's not that far off, right?
She's got a friend over there. Probably hook you up. What do you think?
-No, thanks. I can get my own dates. -Yeah, you can, but you don't.
-What is that supposed to mean? -Nothing. What do you got?
Mark and Ann Telesca of New Paltz, New York...
...were both found dead in their home a few days ago.
Mm-hm.
Throats were slit. There were no prints, no murder weapons, all-- Dean.
No prints, no murder weapons, all doors and windows locked from the inside.
Could just be a garden-variety murder, not our department.
-No. Dad says different. DEAN: What do you mean?
Look. Dad noted three murders in the same area of upstate New York.
First one right here, 1 91 2, the second one in 1 945...
...and the third in 1 970, the same m.o. as the Telescas.
The throats were slit, the houses were locked from the inside.
Time passed between the murders. Nobody tracked the pattern but Dad.
He kept his eyes peeled for another one.
-And now we got one? -Exactly.
All right, l'm with you. It's worth checking out.
We can't pick this up till first thing, though, right?
-Yeah. -Good.
-Dean. -Ladies. Did you miss me?
-Hell, yeah. -l'm just kid--
Listen, l talked to my producer, and it is looking good.
WOMAN 1 : Great. WOMAN 2: Cool.
[HORN HONKlNG]
[SAM LAUGHING]
[DEAN GROANS]
Man, that's so not cool.
I just swept the Telesca house with the EMF. It's clean.
-And last night, while you were out... -Good times.
...l checked the history of the house. No hauntings, no violent crimes.
Nothing strange about the Telescas.
So if it's not the people, and it's not the house...
...then, uh, maybe it's the contents, a cursed object.
-House is clean. -Yeah, I know, you said that.
No, I mean it's empty. No furniture or nothing.
Where's all their stuff?
[CLASSlCAL MUSlC PLAYING]
Uh-huh.
[INAUDIBLE DlALOGUE]
Consignment auctions, estate sales.
Looks like a garage sale for Wasps, if you ask me.
Can l help you gentlemen?
I'd like some champagne, please.
He's not a waiter.
I'm Sam Connors.
That's my brother, Dean. We are art dealers, with Connors Limited.
-You're art dealers? -That's right.
I'm Daniel Blake. This is my auction house.
Now, gentlemen, this is a private showing...
...and l don't remember seeing you on the guest list.
We're there, Chuckles, just need to take another look.
Oh. Finally. Hmm.
Cheers.
A fine example of American primitive, wouldn't you say?
Well, l'd say it's more Grant Wood than Grandma Moses.
But you knew that. You just wanted to see if I did.
Guilty. And clumsy. l apologize. I'm Sarah Blake.
I'm Sam. This is my brother, Dean.
Dean. Can we get you some more mini-quiche?
-Mm-mm. I'm good. Thanks. -So can l help you with something?
Yeah, actually. Um, what can you tell us about the Telesca estate?
The whole thing's pretty grisly, if you ask me...
...selling their things this soon, but Dad's right about one thing:
Sensationalism brings out the crowds. Even the rich ones.
-ls it possible to see the provenances? -l'm afraid there isn't any chance of that.
-Why not? -You're not on the guest list.
I think it's time to leave.
-Well, we don't have to be told twice. -Apparently, you do.
Okay. lt's all right. We don't want any trouble. We'll go.
Dad, that was rude.
DEAN: Grant Wood, Grandma Moses? SAM: Art history course.
-lt's good for meeting girls. -lt's like I don't even know you.
[IN UNlSON] Huh.
-Now, what was the providence? -"Provenance."
It's a certificate of origin, like a biography.
We can use them to track the pieces' history. See if any has got a freaky past.
Well, we're not getting anything out of Chuckles, but, uh, Sarah....
Maybe you can get her to write it all on a cocktail napkin.
[LAUGHlNG] Not me.
Oh, no, no, no.
-Pickups are your thing, Dean. -lt wasn't my butt she was checking out.
In other words, you want me to use her to get information.
Sometimes you gotta take one for the team. Call her.
[PIANO MUSlC PLAYING]
-Nice place. -Yeah.
-Glad you called. Surprised, but glad. -Yeah?
Although you seemed to have a hard time getting out the words:
"Would you like to have dinner?"
Yeah. l haven't really been on a date in a while.
-Welcome to the club. -You're kidding me.
WAITER: Here we are. -Thanks.
The wine list.
[CLEARS THROAT]
I don't know about Romeo here, but I'll have a beer.
[CHUCKLES]
WAITER: And you?
SAM: Make that two. WAITER: Certainly.
SAM: So you studied art in school, huh? SARAH: lt's true. I was an artist.
A terrible, terrible artist.
That's why I'm in the auction business.
-And you were pre-law? -Yeah.
But you didn't go to law school. How come?
Ah, it's a really long story for another time.
You're not like any art dealer I've ever met.
So, what did you mean when you said you hadn't been on a date in a while?
-Making me feel like l'm not a loser? -l'm sure you're many things.
I'm also sure loser isn't one of them.
It was my mom. She died about a year ago.
Totally unexpected.
It really threw me.
I went into this shell. A nice, warm, safe shell.
But lately l've been thinking, it's not what she would have wanted for me.
So....
So, what about you? You're a reasonably attractive guy.
[LAUGHS]
-Reasonably. -Why haven't you been out and about?
Another long story for another time.
So she just handed the providences over to you, huh?
-Provenances. -Provenances?
And, yes, we went back to her place, I got a copy of the papers....
-And? -And nothing. That's it. l left.
You didn't have to con her or do any special favors or anything like that?
Dean, would you get your mind out of the gutter?
When this thing's done, we could stick around.
-Why? -So you could take her out again.
-lt's obvious you're into her. I see that. -Hey, l think l got something here.
"Portrait of Isaiah Merchant's family, painted 1 91 0."
Now, compare the names of the owners with Dad's journal.
"First purchased in 1 912 to Peter Simms."
"Peter Simms murdered in 1 91 2."
Same thing in 1 945. Oh, same thing in 1 970.
Then stored until it was donated to a charity auction last month...
...where the Telescas bought it.
So, what do you think, it's haunted or cursed?
Either way, it's toast.
DEAN: Come on.
Go ahead.
DEAN: Ugly-ass thing.
If you ask me, we're doing the art world a favor.
-We got a problem. I can't find my wallet. -How is that my problem?
Because I think l dropped it in the warehouse last night.
You're kidding, right?
No. I mean, it's got my prints, my ID-- Well, my fake lD, anyway.
But we gotta get it before somebody else finds it. Come on.
How do you lose your wallet, Dean?
-Hey, guys. -Sarah. Hey.
SARAH: What are you doing here?
SAM: Oh.
We-- We are leaving town. And, you know, we came to say goodbye.
Oh, what are you talking about, Sam?
We're sticking around for at least another day or two.
Sam, by the way, l'm gonna go ahead and give you that 20 bucks I owe you.
I always forget, you know.
[DEAN CHUCKLING]
There you go.
Well, l'll leave you two crazy kids alone. I gotta go do something, somewhere.
-So. -l had a good time last night.
-Yeah. Yeah, l did too. -Maybe we should do it again sometime.
You know, I'd love to, l really would, but Dean, he was just screwing around.
-We really are taking off today. -Oh. Oh.
-Oh, that's too bad. -Oh, my God.
-What? -The--
That painting looks so good.
If you can call that monstrosity good, then, yeah, l guess.
-What do you know about that painting? -Not much, just that it creeps me out.
We sold it to the Telescas at a charity auction the night they were murdered.
Now you're just gonna sell it again?
As much as my dad wants to, no, I won't let him.
-l think it'd be in bad taste. -Good. Yeah.
You know what? Make sure you don't, okay?
Why? Don't tell me you're interested in that.
No. No. God, no. Not in buying it, no. You know what? l gotta go.
I gotta take care of something. But l will call you back. l will call you.
-l'll see you later. -Wait, so you're not leaving tonight?
No, I guess not. l'll see you.
Okay.
I don't understand, Dean. We burned the damn thing.
Yeah, thank you, Captain Obvious.
All right, we just need to figure out another way to get rid of it. Any ideas?
Okay, all right. Well, um, in almost all the lore about haunted paintings...
...it's always the painting's subject that haunts them.
Yeah? We need to figure out everything there is to know...
...about that creepy-ass family in that creepy-ass painting.
What were their names again?
-You said the lsaiah Merchant family? -Yeah, that's right.
I dug up every scrap of local history I could find.
-So, uh, are you boys crime buffs? -Kind of.
-Yeah. Why do you ask? -Well....
-Yes. Yeah, that sounds about right. -The whole family was killed?
It seems this Isaiah, he slits his kids' throats...
...then his wife, then himself.
Now, he was a barber by trade. Used a straight razor.
-Why did he do it? -Well, let's look.
"People who knew him described Isaiah as having stern and harsh temperament.
Controlled his family with an iron fist. Wife, two sons, adopted daughter."
Uh.... Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
There were whispers that the wife was gonna take the kids and leave--
Uh, which, of course, you know, in that day and age....
Um, so instead, old man Isaiah, well, he gave them all a shave.
[LAUGHlNG]
-Say what happened to the bodies? -Just that they were all cremated.
-Anything else? MAN: Yeah.
Actually, I found a picture of the family. It's right here, somewhere.
Right. Here it is.
-Could we get a copy of this, please? -Hmm. Sure.
Dad, you promised you wouldn't sell that painting.
I know, sweetie, but Evelyn's offered a persuasive amount of money.
You're shameless, you know that?
For that kind of money, I can afford to be.
SAM: I'm telling you, man, l'm sure of it.
Painting at the auction house, Dad is looking down.
Painting here, Dad's looking out. The painting has changed, Dean.
You think Daddy Dearest is in the painting and handing out...
...Columbian neckties like with his family?
Yeah, it seems like it.
But if his bones are already dusted, how are we gonna stop him?
If lsaiah's position changed, then maybe other things in the painting changed.
-You know, it could give us some clues. -What, like a Da Vinci Code deal?
I don't know. l'm just still waiting for the movie on that one.
Anyway, we gotta get back in and see that painting.
Which is good. You can get more time to crush on your girlfriend.
-Dude, enough already. -What?
What? Ever since we got here, you've been trying to pimp me out to Sarah.
-Just back off, all right? -Well, you like her, don't you?
You like her, she likes you, you're consenting adults.
What's the point, Dean?
-We'll just leave. We always leave. -l'm not talking about marriage.
I don't get it. What do you care if l hook up?
Because then maybe you wouldn't be so cranky all the time.
[SCOFFS]
You know, seriously, Sam, this isn't about just hooking up, okay?
I mean, l think that this Sarah girl could be good for you.
And l don't mean any disrespect, but I'm sure that this is about Jessica, right?
Now, l don't know what it's like to lose somebody like that...
...but l would think that she would want you to be happy.
God forbid, have fun once in a while. Wouldn't she?
Yeah, l know she would.
Yeah, you're right, part of this is about Jessica.
-But not the main part. -What's it about?
Yeah, all right.
We still gotta see that painting, which means you still gotta call Sarah, so....
[CLEARS THROAT]
Sarah, hey, it's Sam. Hey. Hi.
Good. Good, yeah. Um, what about you?
-Yeah, good. Good, really good. -Smooth.
So, uh.... So listen, me and my brother were, uh, thinking...
...that maybe we'd like to come back in and look at the painting again.
I think maybe we are interested in buying it.
Wait. What? Who'd you sell it to?
Sarah, I need an address right now.
[RUSTLlNG]
-Sam, what's happening? SAM: l told you you shouldn't have come.
[POUNDING ON DOOR]
-Hello. Anybody home? -You said Evelyn might be in danger.
-What kind of danger? DEAN: l can't knock this down.
I gotta pick it.
What are you guys, burglars?
SAM: l wish it's that simple. You should wait in the car.
-lt's for your own good. -The hell l will. Evelyn's a friend.
-Evelyn? SAM: Evelyn.
SARAH: Evelyn?
Evelyn? lt's Sarah Blake.
-Are you all right? DEAN: Sarah, don't. Sarah.
[SCREAMlNG]
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
[SARAH GASPING]
Oh, my God.
[KNOCKlNG ON DOOR]
Hey. You all right?
No, actually. l just lied to the cops and told them l went to Evelyn's...
...alone and found her like that.
-Thank you. -Don't. l'm about to call them...
...if you don't tell me what the hell's going on. Who's killing these people?
-"What." -What?
It's not "who." It's "what" is killing those people?
Sarah, you saw that painting move.
No. No, l was-- l was seeing things.
-lt's impossible. -Yeah, well, welcome to our world.
SAM: Sarah, I know this sounds crazy...
...but we think that that painting is haunted.
You're joking.
You're not joking.
-God. The guys l go out with. -Sarah, think about it.
Evelyn, the Telescas, they both had the painting.
And there have been others. Wherever this thing goes, people die.
And we're just trying to stop it.
And that's the truth.
Well, then l guess you better show me. l'm coming with you.
What? No. Sarah, no. You should just go home.
This stuff can get dangerous and....
And l don't want you to get hurt.
Look, you guys are probably crazy, but if you're right?
Well, me and my dad sold that painting. We might've got these people killed.
I'm not saying l'm not scared, because l am scared...
...but l'm not gonna run and hide either.
So are we going or what?
Sam.
Marry that girl.
Uh, isn't this a crime scene?
Well, you already lied to the cops. What's another infraction?
Aren't you worried that it's gonna, you know, kill us?
No. It seems to do its thing at night. I think we're all right in the daylight.
Sam, check it out.
The razor, it's, uh-- lt's closed. But it's open in that one.
SARAH: What? -lf the spirit's changing aspects...
...of the painting, maybe it's doing so for a reason.
Hey, hey. Look at this. The painting in the painting.
Looks like a crypt or a mausoleum or something.
Hmm.
"Merchant."
[CAWlNG]
This is the third boneyard we've checked.
I think this ghost is jerking us around.
So this is what you guys do for a living?
Not exactly. We don't get paid.
Well, mazel tov.
DEAN: Over there.
[DEAN COUGHING]
Okay. That, right there, is the creepiest thing I've ever seen.
It was, uh, sort of a tradition at the time.
Whenever a child died, sometimes they'd preserve the kid's...
...favorite toy in a glass case. Put it next to the headstone or crypt.
-You notice anything strange here? -Uh, where do l start?
No, that's not what l mean. Look at the urns.
-Yeah, there are only four. DEAN: Yeah, mom and the three kids.
Daddy Dearest isn't here.
So where is he?
SARAH: So, what is your brother doing in there?
Searching county death certificates. To learn what happened to lsaiah's body.
How'd he even get in the door?
Lying and subterfuge, mostly.
You have a, um....
You have an eyelash on your....
Your right-- No. Uh, you know what?
[BOTH LAUGH]
-Do you mind if l--? -No.
Okay.
Okay, l got it.
Make a wish.
-Sam, can l ask you something? -Yeah, sure.
I don't mean to be forward, but a girl could wait here forever.
Is there something here between us? Or am l delusional?
You're not delusional.
But there's a "but" coming.
But l don't think this would be a good idea.
Can l ask why?
Because I like you.
Wait. You lost me.
Look, it's hard to explain.
It's just that when people are around me....
I don't know, they get hurt.
-What do you mean? -l mean, like, physically hurt.
With what my brother and l do, it's....
Sarah...
...l had a girlfriend.
And she died. And my mom died too.
I don't know, it's like....
It's like l'm cursed or something.
Like death just follows me around.
I'm not scared of much. But if l let myself have feelings for anybody--
SARAH: You're scared they'd get hurt too.
-That's very sweet. And very archaic. -Sorry?
Look. l'm a big girl, Sam. It's not your job...
...to make decisions for me. There's always a chance of getting hurt.
I'm not talking about a broken heart and a tub of Hรคagen-Dazs.
-l'm talking life and death. -Tomorrow I could get hit by a bus.
That's what life is.
Look. l know losing somebody you love, it's terrible.
You shut yourself off. Believe me, l know.
But when you shut out pain, you shut out everything else too.
Sarah, you don't understand. The pain that I went through...
...l can't go through it again. I can't.
Am l interrupting something?
-No. -Not at all.
-Huh. Apparently. -So, what did you get?
Pay dirt. The surviving relatives of the Merchant family...
...were so ashamed of Isaiah, they didn't want him interred with the family.
They handed him over to the county. County gave him a pauper's funeral.
Economy style. Turns out he wasn't cremated, he was buried in a pine box.
-So there are bones to burn. -There are bones to burn.
Tell me you know where.
[SAM AND DEAN GRUNTlNG AND PANTlNG]
You guys seem to be uncomfortably comfortable with this.
Well, this isn't exactly the first grave we've dug.
Still think l'm a catch?
Think l got something.
DEAN: You've been a real pain in the ass, Isaiah.
Good riddance.
SAM: Keep the motor running.
I thought the painting was harmless now.
Better safe than sorry. We're gonna bury the sucker.
-l wanna come with you. SAM: You sure?
-Yeah. -Hey. Hey, hey.
I'll stay here, you go make your move.
Sam. l'm serious.
[ROCK MUSlC PLAYlNG ON RADIO]
[MUSlC STOPS]
Uh, Sam, you're the expert on all this ghost stuff.
Is that painting supposed to look like that?
Where's the little girl?
And the razor.
[GlRL LAUGHlNG]
[CREAKING]
Dean! Hey. ls that you?
DEAN: Sammy, you all right?
[CELL PHONE RlNGS]
-Tell me you slammed the door. -lt wasn't me. It was the girl.
Girl? What girl?
She's out of the painting. Might've been her all along.
DEAN [ON PHONE]: Wasn't the dad looking at her?
-Maybe he was warning us. -Let's recap later, all right? Get us out.
Trying to pick the lock. Door won't budge.
-Then break it down. -Okay. Let me grab my battering ram.
-Dean, it's coming. -Hold it off...
...until l figure something. Get salt or iron.
SAM: Come on.
What house doesn't have salt? Low-sodium freaks. Find any iron?
SARAH: No. What's it for? -lron repels evil.
But it's got to be pure. Hurry.
Uh, Dean. Give me a sec. Don't go anywhere.
Look in the chair. Sometimes the seats.
[SARAH AND SAM GASP]
Sam.
That is just so wrong.
[ROARING]
Iron?
Yeah.
-Sammy, you okay? SAM [ON PHONE]: Yeah. For now.
-How we gonna waste her? -l don't know. She was cremated.
-Nothing left to burn. -How's she still around?
There must be something else.
Sam, wait. We used to handle antique dolls at the auction.
That's fascinating, Sarah, but important right now?
Well, back then, they used to make the dolls in the kids' image.
I mean, everything. Like they would use the kids' real hair.
Dean. Sarah says the doll might have the girl's hair.
Human remains. Same as bones.
[IN UNlSON] The mausoleum.
[GRUNTlNG]
SARAH: Sam! Come on, push! Come on.
[GRUNTlNG]
Come on, Dean.
[GROANING]
Come on, come on.
[YELLS]
[CELL PHONE RlNGlNG]
Sam, you good?
Not bad.
This was archived in the county records.
The Merchant's adopted daughter, Melanie.
Know why she was up for adoption? Her real family was killed in their beds.
SARAH: She killed them?
DEAN: Who'd suspect her? Sweet little girl.
So then she kills lsaiah and his family. The old man takes the blame.
His spirit's been trying to warn people ever since.
-Where's this one go? -Take it out back and burn it.
I'm serious, guys. Thanks.
So why'd the girl do it?
Killing others? Killing herself?
Some people are just born tortured. So when they die...
-...their spirits are just as dark. -Maybe. l don't care.
It's over. We move on.
I guess this means you're leaving.
[SIGHS]
I'll go wait in the car. See you, Sarah.
I'm the one who burned the doll...
...and destroyed the spirit, but don't thank me or anything.
[SIGHS]
There are a million things that I want to say...
...but for the life of me I can't think of one.
Yeah, l'll miss you too.
-You know, there's a lesson in all of this. -What's that?
We all got through this in one piece.
I didn't get hurt.
Yeah, l'm glad for that.
So maybe you're not cursed. Maybe....
Maybe you'll come back and see me.
I will.
[KNOCKlNG ON DOOR]
That's my boy.
[GlGGLES]
[ENGLISH SDH]
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