All language subtitles for Its.Kind.of.a.Funny.Story.2010.720p.BrRip.x264.YIFY

It starts on a bridge.

Craig!

What were you planning to
do about your bike, Hon?

I don't care about my bike.
I'm killing myself.

But we spent a lot of
money on the bike, sport.

We only ask that
you take care of it.

Think of me, Craig. I might
want that bike when I grow up.

I'm sorry.
I just didn't think it...

That's right. You just
didn't think about us

when you were deciding to
do this, did you, honey?

Pretty selfish, I'd say.

Have you thought about how
this might affect your sister?

I'm... I'm sorry, I...

This is the moment where I usually
wake up in a sweaty panic.

But for some reason,

this time was different.

L...

I want to kill myself.

Fill this out. So...

How you doing?

You got a cigarette?

Uh... No, sorry.

What's wrong with you?

I just don't smoke.

No, I mean,
why are you in an ER,

at 5:00 on a Sunday morning?

Well...

I guess, there's just been

a lot going on
in my mind lately.

Go ahead.

Okay, well, this is sort
of difficult to explain.

But... See there's this girl...

Yeah, got you.

And this summer school application
that I'm really nervous about.

Summer school?

Yeah, it's like this super
prestigious, kind of...

Why would you want to be
in school in the summer?

You should be on Coney
island, bird-dogging chicks.

Are you a doctor?

What do you think?

You... You don't really
seem like a doctor.

You ever heard of
Doogie Howser?

Well, I hope they fix
whatever's wrong with you.

Thank you. Yeah.

So, how long have you
been feeling suicidal?

I don't know. I've been
depressed for about a year.

Mmm-hmm.

And I've thought about it
before, but never like this.

You know, never so real.

Did anything happen today specifically
to trigger these feelings?

Sometimes I wish I had an easy
answer for why I'm depressed.

That my father beat me.
Or I was sexually abused.

But my problems are
less dramatic than that.

Like, my dad always asks
the wrong questions.

So, Craig, how's the Intro
to Wall Street class?

So maybe this is
a slight exaggeration,

but I do have a problem
with stress vomiting.

And my friends sometimes look at
me like I'm from another planet.

And I'm obsessed
with this girl.

Who happens to be going out
with my best friend.

So, is there any one thing that
made me want to jump off a bridge?

Um... No. Nothing unusual.

Hmm.

You on any medications?

Zoloft. But I stopped.

Yeah, did your doctor
take you off the meds?

No, I just stopped on my own.

Oh, you shouldn't do that.

Well, Craig, it doesn't seem like
you're a danger to yourself.

So, what I'm gonna suggest is
that we contact your parents,

let them know what's going on,

and then we refer you to one
of our outpatient services.

Okay? But...

I need help now.

I know you're upset.

But, Craig, the people that
we admit into this facility,

are very, very sick.

I am, too.

Well, can't you just, like,
give me something?

Not without your
parents' consent.

Look, this is serious business.

Maybe I'm not explaining right
how serious this is.

It feels like everything
is just building up,

and everyone else,
they just seem

to handle everything.
You know, like...

But not me, you know.

I'm scared, okay?

And I can't go back out there.

I don't know what...

I might do something.

So, I just need some help. Please.
I just need you to help me.

Welcome to 3 North, Craig.

Um... What exactly is 3 North?

Our adult psychiatric floor.

Oh, but, I'm only 16.

Our teen floor is undergoing
some renovations,

so all teens are here
with the adults.

And while you're with us, you'll
be expected to act like one.

So, starting tomorrow,

you'll follow the schedule and
participate in the group activities.

In the meantime, we'll contact your
family, and they can bring over

a change of clothes, toothbrush,
that kind of thing.

Well, I don't think
I'll be here that long.

I have school tomorrow, so...

You'll have to discuss
that with Dr. Minerva.

Now, do you have any sharp objects on you?
Pocket knife? Keys?

And your belt and shoe laces.

My shoe laces?

We can't take any chances.

Hey, Dr. Minerva.

Hey, Smitty.

This is our new patient,
Craig Gilner.

Hi, Craig. How are you?

Um... Just, like, you know.

Well, why don't you get settled
in, and we'll talk later, okay?

Nice to meet you, Craig.

It'll come to you.

Good morning, Jimmy.

What was that about?

Jimmy? He's a schizophrenic.

Is there a place here
for people more like me?

We got all kinds of patients here, man.
All kinds...

Hey, hey, Bobby!

My man.

How about a tour for our new friend,
Craig, here? What do you say?

- Sure thing, babe.
- Thanks, man.

So, Bobby's gonna
show you around,

while we fix up
your room, okay?

Okay. Yeah? All right.

See you guys in a jiff.

So, is this like a mental ward?

Not a ward, it's a hospital.

Well, this is
where we hang out.

There's a record
player and such.

All the records are scratched.

Some folks like to hang out
and play table tennis.

Did they tell you
about the points system?

Points for ping-pong?

I think the name ping-pong
trivializes the sport.

But, I mean, like, points for privileges,
to hang out in the rec room,

visit the gift shop,
stuff like that.

You can join them if you like.

Uh, no, I'm cool.

Cool Craig. I like that.

This is the shower.
It doesn't have a lock.

So when you go in, put
it on "in-use," get it?

I got it. Okay, you got
it, but nobody else does.

So they'll walk in on you when
you're scrubbing your balls.

And you don't want that.

There's one in
the other hall, too,

but I wouldn't use it.
It bothers Solomon.

Who's Solomon?

Hey, Bobby! Hey, Cap.

Right here, this is
where you call people.

Assuming you have people.
Or they can call you.

You know, telephone.

And this is the TV room.

People hang out and
watch TV in that room.

That's why they call it that.

Um... Who was that?

That's Noelle.
She's one of the teens.

Did they tell you
about the renovations?

Yeah.

How old are you?

Sixteen.

Sixteen!

You look stressed out for 16.

You need to relax. Get a girlfriend,
or something, you know.

I'm working on it. Mmm-hmm.

So what is it you
do here, exactly?

Same thing as you.

You're a patient?

What were you doing in the
emergency room this morning?

ER has the best coffee, son.

They just let you out?

No.

What are you in here for?

Let's go see if Smitty's got
your room ready.

Hey, Muqtada,
got a new roommate, man.

Hey.

Don't take it personal, man.
He doesn't really talk much.

And I've actually never
seen him leave the room.

Okay, guys, lunch in five.

What do they have for lunch?

I'm sorry?

Please, turn out light.

Dr. Minerva.

I'm feeling much better now.

I was feeling bad this
morning, but I'm okay now.

So, you know, I'd like to
go home, if that's cool.

It says here you're suicidal
and asked to be admitted.

Yeah, I thought you guys
could do something quick.

You know, like give me some
medication to make me feel better.

Or...

Look, I didn't think
that I'd be committed.

I really don't think
I belong here.

A lot of patients feel that way at first.
Just give it a little time.

How little?

Five days.

Five days?

No more than 30.
We'll have an evaluation

to see if you're ready
to leave on Thursday.

I can't be here until Thursday

because I'll miss school, and my
friends might find out where I am.

It's nothing to be
ashamed of, Craig.

Depression is
a medical illness.

If you were diabetic, would
you be embarrassed by that?

Well, can I at least talk to
my mom about this before...

Of course, Craig. I just spoke to
her, she's very anxious to see you.

Craig!

Don't blame my parents
for how messed up I am.

Okay, so my dad works too much.

And my mom's
a little too fragile.

And my sister's some
kind of child genius.

But it's not like I was never
hugged as a child or anything.

In fact, they've been pretty
supportive through ail this.

I knew you were having a hard
time, but I had no idea.

That you were... That it was...

Well, you're so brave, honey.
I'm so proud of you.

Really? Um...

'Cause I was actually
having second thoughts.

Oh, no, hon. I think the
doctors said they need you

to stay here for a couple
of days for observation.

I think that's
a real good idea.

But I don't think
you really understand, okay?

Some of the people in here
are really messed up.

I don't think my roommate's
left the room in weeks.

I think we better leave it up

to the doctor's discretion,
you know.

We've tried and...

They're professionals, they can
help you in ways that we can't.

And I think it's...

I think it looks like a real nice place.
Right, George?

Take your hands
out of my pockets!

Yeah. When can I join?

Me, too. Can I stay, too?

Oh, no, honey.
But we'll come and visit.

They took my cell phone, so some
people might try to call the house.

Just please do not
tell them that I'm in here.

Here are some clothes,
and toiletries and stuff.

And will you
eat something, please?

- Ian Curtis.
- Who?

Dude from Joy Division.
Hung himself.

Kurt Cobain.

Freud.

Ernest Hemingway.

Salvador Allende.

Jesus Christ, girl. Can you pick
somebody we've heard of for once?

Chilean president.

Shot himself rather than surrender
to a fascist military coup.

Mmm-mmm.
I don't think that counts.

Of course, it counts.

If he was going to die
anyway, it doesn't count.

Hey, Craig!

Come sit with the men.

Craig, this is my pal, Johnny, and
this clown right here, this is Humble.

You got a girlfriend?

He's working on it.

They got some
cute ones your age.

I had a lot of women
in my day, kid.

Yeah?

You don't have to act
so surprised.

Back in the day,
I was Sir Lick-a-Lot.

Ask Bobby.

But you want to know the secret to
keeping any woman under your spell?

I love you.

That's it?

That's it. But it don't hurt
if you can play guitar.

Don't mess with the kid's mind,

he's already screwed up
enough as it is.

Why are you so screwed, kid?

Mind your own business, Humble.

That's cool.

But you should know, Craig, if you don't
open up, you're never going to heal.

Hey, what's the pot up to now?

Eleven. Eleven?

Yesterday, it was 12.

Humble ate a buck.

Humble ate a buck?

The professor bet him a dollar,
he wouldn't eat it. He won.

What is the world coming to?

Bunch of nut jobs in here,
I'll tell you that.

What's the money for?

Pizza party.

So we don't have
to eat this crap.

They say we can have one, but
we gotta pay for it ourselves.

Well, I have eight dollars.

Well, you don't have to
go bragging about it, Craig.

People in here have nothing.

Show a little humility, please.

No. I didn't mean... It's...

It's okay. You're young,
you'll learn.

Craig. You get two
points for eating, man.

I bet Smitty's
got 15 bucks on him.

And he's got
a 20 spot. I saw it.

Let's go jump him
in the parking lot.

It's under the hat.

It's under the hat?

Sorry.

Check.

So, Craig, how are you
adjusting to 3 North?

Uh... Okay, I guess.

Dr. Mahmoud wrote that
you were taking Zoloft,

but went off it three weeks ago.
Is that right?

Yeah.

Do you see a therapist?

Dr. Yanof was the one
who prescribed me the Zoloft.

I see her every,
you know, month or so.

Why did you stop taking it?

I guess I thought I was better.
Like I didn't need it.

Maybe that's because
it was working.

Can you describe to me
how you were feeling

before coming
here this morning?

I guess, depressed.

Anxious, stressed.

Have you been feeling more
stress than usual lately?

Any reason in particular?

Yeah. There's this Franklin
Gates Summer Semester thing

that my dad...

Well, that I really
want to get into.

But the application
is due in a week

and I haven't
even looked at it.

Why not?

Every time I think about it,

my brain starts this cycling
thing about not getting in.

What would happen
if you didn't get in?

Then I wouldn't be able to put
it on my college applications.

Which means I wouldn't
get into a good college.

But not even Adam Smith
could have foreseen

the inequities of
modern capitalism.

If I didn't get into a good college,
I wouldn't have a good job.

Diffusing the situation in Iran
through unilateral diplomacy

is my top priority
as Commander in Chief.

Which means I wouldn't be able
to afford a good Lifestyle.

Hey, MTV. It's your boy,
Craig Gilner.

Welcome to my crib.

So I wouldn't be able
to find a girlfriend.

Which means I'd
probably get depressed.

And I'd end up Like Muqtada in a place
like this for the rest of my life.

So, what would happen
if I didn't get in?

I don't know.
It's hard to explain.

Do you have anyone you can explain it to?
Friends? Family?

I have friends and family,
but it's not always easy.

It's important to
have a support system.

People you can really talk to.

Have you been having
any other symptoms?

I have trouble eating.
I can't keep it down.

All right.

You'll start group
activities tomorrow,

we'll check in
again on Tuesday.

You have any questions?

Yes. Um...

if I'm feeling better,

do you think I can get out
of here by tomorrow?

Because I have school
and this application and...

Five days, Craig. Minimum.

I know this seems like a
strange place at first,

but try to make the most of it.

It's Monday.

I shouldn't be waking up next to some
depressive middle-aged Egyptian dude.

I shouldn't be showering on a co-ed
floor in a stall without a lock.

I shouldn't be
Lining up for meds

behind schizophrenics
and sociopaths.

It's Monday,
I should be in school.

But I guess that's what got
me here in the first place.

When my parents Went to school,

they just went to the one
closest to their house.

Makes sense, right?

A lot of places
are still like this.

Cleveland, probably Denver.

But not New York.

You've got schools
for science geeks like...

Bronx High School of Science.

Schools for thespians.

The LaGuardia School
for the Performing Arts.

Schools for do-gooders.

EI Puente Academy
for Peace and Justice.

But the most competitive of ail

New York City public schools
is this one.

Executive Pre-Professional.

My school.

This billionaire philanthropist
named Gerard Lutz

set it up in conjunction
with the pubic school system.

So it's not some private school
for elite Upper-East-Siders.

You can be on welfare
and food stamps,

or your parents can own an
island in the South Pacific.

It doesn't matter.

You'll be accepted as long
as you're one of the 800

smartest and most accomplished
students in the five boroughs.

Like these kids here.

There must have been a serious
clerical error, because somehow...

I got in.

Me, too. Me, too.

You, too? You, too?

That's my best friend, Aaron, getting
flirt-punched by Nia for the first time.

There were many more of those.

Followed by hand-holding,
kissing and eventually, sex.

I don't like to
picture that one.

What I would give to be
flirt-punched by Nia just once.

And so it began...

Look at those mahatmas.

I always wanted a Harley
with hot, tight mahatmas.

You can have the mahatmas,
I just want the beaver.

Hey, Bobby, check out
this bike.

Yeah, I don't get wrapped in a
bunch of stuff I can't have.

Relax, it's just for fun, bro.

That's not fun.

That's propaganda, man.

All those Madison Avenue types.

Telling you how
to live your life.

Fast cars, hot chicks,

Reese's Pieces, Gucci.

Werther's Original.

I don't buy into that bullshit.

Are you gonna
eat your burrito, Craig?

No, I'm not hungry.
You can have it.

Hello, Mr. Breakfast Burrito.

Humble, put that back.

He said I could have it.

Yeah, it's really fine.

Craig's gotta eat, too.
Put it back.

Take a hike, Bob.

He's not hungry.

Thanks, Bobby,
but I'm really not hungry.

Fine, what do
I care if you eat?

I understand there was an
incident this morning.

Would anyone care
to talk about it?

Something involving
a breakfast burrito.

Johnny?

It was between Bobby and Humble.
Ask them.

I was interested in hearing it
from an impartial observer.

Well, if you want my opinion, I
think Bobby has been on edge

because of his interview, and he's
lashing out because he's nervous.

Interesting observation,
Johnny.

My hemorrhoids are
flaring up too, Johnny.

Want to tell the group
about that?

Hemorrhoids! It'll come to ya!

Bobby, it's okay if you want
to keep your feelings private,

but you should know that there's
nothing wrong with being nervous

about your interview tomorrow.

I'm not nervous
about my interview.

Then what is it, Bob?

Maybe he's hungry.

He doesn't look hungry.

He looks tired.

Did you sleep last night?

He didn't eat today.

Yes, he did.

Did you see him eat?

I'm pretty sure he ate.

I didn't see him eat.

I get anxious when I'm tired.

Okay, listen.

I'm not hungry and I'm not tired.
It's just the sweater.

It's all I have for
my interview tomorrow.

I told you it
was the interview.

It's a nice sweater, Bob.

No, it's not. It smells
like a hobo's Band-Aid.

But it looks good on you.

About as good as
your hair looks on you.

Bobby, no insults, please.

I can loan you a shirt.

What was that, Craig?

I'll just call my mom and have her
bring one of my dad's shirts over.

It's not a problem.
I live like two blocks away.

No, thanks.

Bobby! Take the shirt.

Yeah, he's trying to help, Bob.

It's a very nice offer, Craig.

Bobby, why are you
reluctant to accept it?

'Cause I don't
want any handouts.

It wouldn't exactly
be a handout.

He'd just be loaning it to you.

Okay, I'll take it. As long
as you'll get off my back.

Do you want the shirt, Bobby?

I would...

I would like the shirt.

Craig?

Is it okay if it has
yellow armpit stains?

Sorry, it was a dumb joke.

When are you going to let
me get to see her again?

When are you going to let
me get to see her again?

Because I'm her father.
You don't think that I have...

What's that? I do have...
l will have a place.

I have a... I'm gonna have a
place on Thursday. It's true.

Listen, I never asked
you for anything.

Could you just, for once, maybe
do what I say. Hello? Hello!

You have two new messages.

Hey, Craig. It's me.

Okay. So, she's probably not
in the bathtub right now,

but this is how I sometimes
like to picture Nia.

It's sick, I know.

You were acting
a little weird earlier,

so I just wanted to make
sure everything's okay.

All right, that's it.

I'm with Aaron. He's
being such a tool. Bye!

Hello, Mr. Gilner, this is your
science teacher, Mr. Reynolds.

We really need to talk about
your missing lab assignments.

Five of them.

Hello?

Hey, Nia. What's up?

Hey! Just finishing my Gates Summer app.
I'll freak if I don't get in.

What's up with you?

Um. Just feeling
kind of, you know...

Yeah, I noticed. Is that why
you weren't in school today?

Yeah, I was feeling pretty
shitty, so I just stayed home.

Yeah. I get Like that
sometimes, too.

Depressed or whatever.

Do you take anything for it?

Um...

Look, I never
told anybody this.

Not even Aaron, but, if it
makes you feel any better,

I see a therapist.

Really?

For, like, over a year now.

I had no idea.

Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing.

I take Zoloft. Shut up!

I do.

Oh, my God! We're
like so screwed up.

Yeah, we're like partners
in mental illness.

The illest.

I'm Solomon. I would ask you
to please keep it down.

I'm trying to rest.

Craig, Who is that?

Um... Excuse me.

Is everything okay?
Will you be much longer?

One second, please.

Are you Like in
a crack den or something?

Yeah, no, it's fine.
Everything's...

It'll come to you. It
will always come to you.

Where are you?

I gotta go, Nia. Bye.

Craig...

It's all yours.

Thanks, Mom.

You know, your dad really
wanted to be here today,

he just had a client crisis.

Client crisis?

Yeah, but he said, he's
for sure coming tomorrow.

Have you made any friends yet?

Yeah, I guess.

Are you friends
with the tranny?

Oh, the tranny.

Not really.

Did you talk to my school?

Because I really can't have them
finding I'm in a place like this.

It could really
damage my future.

No, no. I just said
you were in the hospital.

I didn't say anything specific.

Good. The last thing
I need is for them

to find out I've
been institutionalized.

Transvestite!

Schizo!

What's going on, babe?

Uh...

Sorry. I was just
dropping the shirt off.

She's cute, isn't she?

Yeah. Is she yours?

Veronica. Like the
Elvis Costello song.

How old is she?

Eight and three-quarters.

That's what she says.
Three quarters.

Well, good luck
with your interview.

What's it for, if you
don't mind me asking?

A group home.

Basically,
I need a place to live

when they kick me out
of here on Thursday.

Let me know if you need somebody
to practice with or something.

What do you mean?

Like a practice interview.
So you're better prepared.

Yeah?

Yeah.

You want to try?

You want to try now?

If you're not doing anything.

Okay, great. Uh... Hold on.

Let me do this with
the official shirt on.

Okay. You're ready?

Hold on one second. I don't
know if I'll do it like...

Which is better, like...

This?

Yeah. That looks natural.

Okay.

You can relax.

I'm nervous.

Okay, why is it that you think you
qualify to live in this group home?

Because if you don't accept
me, I'll be homeless.

Okay, good.

Yeah, I think you're ready.

Really? I didn't
sound too desperate?

No. But, uh...

You might want to focus
on the positive things

that you get from
this experience

as opposed to, you know...

The negative.

Exactly. Like what is it that
you could bring to the home?

Something special that
only you could offer.

It could be anything. Maybe
you have a great attitude?

No.

You always clean up
after yourself?

Not really.

You know, I think
in these situations

it's okay to bend the truth
just a little bit.

Yeah. I just don't want to
get people's expectations up

and then disappoint them later.

That's it. You're pragmatic.
That's what you tell them.

Okay, yeah. Right?

Yeah, I know
you're gonna do great.

Thanks.

You want to play
some table tennis?

I'm pretty terrible
at table tennis.

It's all right. It's just for fun.
Come on.

We play a lot around here.
The problem is,

most people are too zonked out
on their meds to compete.

One, zip.

She's a liar.

She's a liar.

Please, baby. Baby.
Please listen. Listen.

I love you.

Don't worry about it.

Of course, I forgive you, baby.

Johnny doesn't phone kiss.

You came.

Yeah. I mean, I had other
plans, but I canceled them.

Good. I thought I might have
scared you off yesterday.

Oh, yeah, celebrity suicide.

It's kind of weird.

Okay, so check it out. We're gonna
play a different game today.

Okay.

I ask you a question
and you ask me a question.

Do we answer them?

It's up to you,
but no matter what,

you have to finish
with a question.

Here we go. You ready? Yeah.

I said finish with a question.

Are you stupid?

Uh, no... Are you?

There you go. Do you
think I'm gross looking?

No. You look awesome.

What's your question?

Why'd you invite me here?

I thought it was nice that
you loaned Bobby your shirt.

Don't you think this is a good
way to get to know someone?

Sure.

Have you played this before?

Not in here.

Are you a virgin?

So...

How long have you been here?

Nice transition, Craig.

Twenty-one days.
Who dragged you here?

I checked myself in, I guess.

Kind of, by accident.

The suicide hotline
said to come.

Why are you here so long?

They think I might
cut myself again.

Why'd you call
the suicide hotline?

I guess...

Maybe I didn't really
want to kill myself.

But I kind of did.

Does that make sense?

So, where do you go?

Executive Pre-Professional.
You?

Delfin.

You're not some sort of
school uniform perv, are you?

You guys wear uniforms?

I knew it.

Okay, sorry, I'm gonna invade your
personal space for one second.

Why?

What are you doing? I'm just...

Ow, you shocked me.
Make a wish.

What do we do now?

Are you still playing?

No. Are you?

I'll race you
to arts and crafts.

Hey, guys. No running, please.

Well, well, well!

Still working on it,
Cool Craig?

It's not what you think.

I think the two of you were playing
the question game outside.

That's what I think.

Well, I guess it is
what you think then.

I thought so.

This is free period arts recreational
therapy for you latecomers.

I'm Jeanie,
recreation director.

I'm Craig.

Well, materials are on the table, Craig.
So just go for it.

That's okay.
I don't really draw.

Sure you do. It doesn't
have to be representative,

it can be abstract,
whatever you want.

Well, I'll just hang out,
if that's okay.

Everybody?
Our new guest, Craig,

is having what we call
an artistic block.

He doesn't know what to draw.

How about beavers?

Humble, we do not draw the sort
of beavers you're talking about.

Oh, really?

That's actually nice.

I thought it was gonna be a vagina.
That's nice.

Rolling pin!

What was that, Roger?
Did you say something?

This is weird.

Look, she's not gonna get off your
back until you draw something.

Can be anything.

I bet you got some crazy stuff in
that messed up little mind of yours.

America has created the longest

peace time economic
expansion in our history.

Shit!

With nearly
18 million new jobs,

wages rising at more than
twice the rate of inflation.

The highest home
ownership in history.

Craig, honey,
what's the matter?

I can't do it. Five years old
and I'm already a failure.

What can't you do?

I can't even trace Manhattan
on tracing paper.

Tracing paper!
Are you kidding me?

Craig, you can't trace freehand
and expect it to be perfect.

Why not?

Because, honey,
you're five years old.

That's no excuse.

Mozart composed three major
symphonies by the time he was five.

Actually, Craig, it was four.

I have an idea.

Instead of trying to
trace maps of Manhattan,

why don't you just
make up your own maps?

Of imaginary places.

Oh, looks like
somebody got unblocked.

That is extraordinary.

- What is it?
- It's so pretty.

Looks like a brain
or something, right?

Yeah, it's a brain map.

It's a great brain map.

It's beautiful.

A smart talent.

I didn't get the brain part.
Looks like a city.

Hey, Craig,
you got a phone call, man.

Hello?

Is this the loony bin?

Okay, I've been
putting this off,

but I guess you
should know more

about my best friend, Aaron.

He's the kind of guy that
Life just comes easy to.

He's got a 4.6 GPA. I don't
even see how that's possible.

And he'll probably get into
the Gates Summer Program,

and claim something Like...

I didn't even apply to that thing.
They totally recruited me.

Whatever, it'll look good
on my college apps.

Not that he'd need it. His
extra-curriculars are out of control.

I mean, Aaron does everything.

He plays sports.

He started a film society.

He invented that adapter thing that
converts vinyl albums into MP3s.

I just couldn't compete.

How'd you get this number?

My girl gave it to me.

How'd you end up
in adult psych?

Do they serve beer in there?

Dude, can you
get me any Vicodin?

Come on, guys. Leave him alone.

Seriously, Craig,
what happened?

I don't know.
I had a bad night.

What do you mean, a bad night?

I'm just feeling...

Dude, you just need
to chill more, okay?

Your problem is,
you never chill.

I'm gonna be chilling tonight,
where you gonna be?

Here. I'm gonna be here.

Oh, my God, Craig! There is
so nothing wrong with you.

Yes, there is. I'm depressed.

I take pills for it. Ask Nia.

Ask Nia what?

Craig!

Forget it. Maybe if
you weren't such a dick,

people would talk to you more and
you would know this kind of stuff.

Dude, is this some kind of
pity play for my girlfriend?

Aaron... What?

Fuck you.

I know, keep it down.
I'm sorry.

I don't have any friends.

This is very
tough thing to learn.

Huh. Seems here someone neglected to
turn in their Gates Summer application.

Who is it that doesn't want to study
at Franklin Gates this summer?

Or eventually get
into a good college?

Get a good job. Have a good lifestyle.
Get laid.

I don't understand why anyone
would want to end up depressed,

alone and homeless

in a psych ward.

Sleeping next to some asocial
reject named Muqtada.

How many times are you gonna
wind up in here again, huh?

What is the matter with you?

How can you let your child
see you like this, huh?

What kind of father are you?

I honestly think
it'd be better off

for her, for all of us,
if you were just dead.

But you can't
even get that right.

Excuse me, miss,
you're going to have to leave.

Come on.

You okay, Bobby?

My accountant.

Check the wrong box
and the woman goes nuts.

And so, who was
there buying soy milk?

Alec Baldwin, which I
thought was kind of cool.

And I talked to the
admissions guy at Gates.

He agreed to give you
an extension.

But, you just focus on getting well, honey.
Don't stress about that. Okay?

Uh, yeah, you shouldn't
stress about it.

That doesn't mean it's not
important to try for it.

George...

Don't you have a client
in crisis somewhere, Dad?

It'll come to you!

Hey, Bobby.

How was your interview?

I blew it.

What happened?

Calm down! Calm down!

Okay, man.
Easy, easy. Easy does it.

Here we go.
Okay. It's all right.

And was that difficult for you?
Seeing Bobby like that?

I was scared.

Not that he was gonna
hurt me or anything.

Just, you know, seeing
someone lose it like that.

You know, it reminded me
of how I feel sometimes.

How's that?

Like I'm on the verge
of just blowing up.

All the stress and pressure
and anxiety just bubbling up.

But I'm never able
to let it out like that.

You know,
I just keep it inside.

Have you always felt that way?

Well, not when I was a kid.

Tell me about it.

What do you mean?

About a time you remember
being happy. Carefree.

Uh...

There was this one day
back in eighth grade.

It wasn't that long ago, but
time felt different back then.

Like there was more of it.

We spent the morning
at Coney island.

Afterwards, we rode our
bikes through Bay Ridge,

Sunset Park,

Park Slope,

Downtown Brooklyn,

Brooklyn Heights,

ail the way to
the Brooklyn Bridge.

Then everything changed.

Girls, grades,
parents, two wars,

impending environmental
catastrophe, a messed up economy...

All these things seemed to come out
of nowhere, like on the same day.

Craig, there is a saying
that goes something like,

"Lord, grant me the strength
to change the things I can,"

"the courage to accept
the things I can't,"

"and the wisdom to
know the difference."

So...

So, let's talk
about your parents.

You think I can
change my parents?

No, but I'm a psychiatrist.

So I have to ask you
about them at some point.

Um...

They're good people.

But, okay, take my dad.
I just saw him today.

And he knows I'm in here
'cause I'm stressed out,

but he still brings up
the Gates application.

It's, like, "Get a clue, Dad."

"There's something
bigger going on here."

And what's that?

I don't know.

But it feels big.

Thanks.

No problem.

Is everything okay?

Yeah, just screwing the pooch
with my interview. It's okay.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm over it.

Really?

Not really,
I'm just zonked on Ativan.

Where'd you get the ice cream?

Mister Softee,
across the street.

Bobby, man!

I want ice cream.

Can I have a lick, Bob?

Got to do two points off, Bob.

It's worth it.

What's with these points?

Yeah, what is
with these points?

I mean, seriously, no one could possibly
be keeping track of all of them.

That's three points off
for doubting the system.

Ah, screw the system. You
can have some of my points.

Johnny needs a lick.

It looks good.

What's this?

Dollar.

For the pizza party.

Where'd you get this?
Don't worry about it.

Yeah, it's a true story.

He was one of
the Black Panthers.

And you never
heard from him again?

Mmm-mmm.

Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
Don't touch me.

Don't touch me.
See that lady right there?

She was a radical
academic up at Columbia,

and then they
passed the Patriot Act.

You know what
the Patriot Act is?

Yeah. Okay.

When they passed the Patriot
Act, then she went bonkers.

She thought that Bush
put bugs in all the phones.

Pretty crazy, right?

And that guy,
Solomon, over there?

He's nuts, too.

He's part of this Hasidic
acid-head scene in Williamsburg.

He did 100 tabs of acid.

Don't look, don't look.
In one night.

And hasn't been the same since.

Yeah. Wow!

Yeah. Crazy, right?

Kinda cool.

Some cool people in here.

Yeah, uh...

What about you?

What about me?

I just...

You know, um,
your daughter, Veronica.

When are you
gonna see her again?

You know, I think my daughter
is just better off without me.

Come on. No, really.

I mean, I'm not really
a role model in this place,

and I think she's just...

She's better off.

Look, I know that
it's none of my business,

and you can tell me to get
lost whenever you want,

but I think that she's just
gonna want her dad around,

and I don't think
she's gonna care about...

You should get lost.

Okay.

I think the Ativan's
wearing off, I'm sorry.

It's fine.

Sorry.

Do you have any
other puke stories

that you'd like
to share with me,

while we're getting
to know each other?

I have a few actually.

Want to try?

No, it's okay.

Welcome back to
musical exploration.

Um, who doesn't
have an instrument?

No worries, bro. Let's get
you right up here on vocals.

Uh, no, I can't sing.

Like he can't draw.

Seriously, I... No, I'm just...

Cool Craig, what are you afraid of?
Come on.

Craig, get up there. Craig.

Craig, Craig, Craig.

You know this one?

I think I've heard it before.

All right.

Bobby and the ladies
will help you out.

The ladies?

Okay, people, just like
we practiced last week.

You guys ready?

Here we go.

Pressure pushing down on me

Pressing down on you
no man ask for

Under pressure

That burns a building down

Splits a family in two

Puts people on streets

That's okay

It's the terror of knowing
what this world is about

Watching some good
friends screaming

Let me out!

Pray tomorrow gets me higher

Pressure on people,
people on the streets

Turned away from it ail

Like a blind man

Sat on a fence
but it don't work

Keep coming up with love
but it's so slashed and torn

Why? Why?

Why?

Love, love, love, love

Insanity Laughs under
pressure we're cracking

Can't We give ourselves
one more chance

Why can't we give love
that one more chance

Why can't we give love

Give love, give love
Give love, give love

Give love, give love
Give love, give love

'Cause love's such
an old fashioned word

And love dares you
to change our way of

Caring about ourselves

This is our last dance

This is ourselves

Under pressure

Under pressure

Pressure

Oh, my God, you're Like
a total rock star.

Like the whole
school's obsessed with you.

You're all anyone
talks about anymore.

You might want to think
about getting a new look.

What do you mean?

Don't worry, we'll find you
something cool, Craig.

Cool Craig.

What?

Oh, somebody in here calls me that.
"Cool Craig."

Is that somebody a girl?

Uh, no.

Well, are there any
cute girls in there?

Not really.

Like, a mental hospital probably
isn't the best spot to hook up.

I'm dying to see this place.

Can I come visit? Sure.

Yeah, you can visit.

That is if you don't mind the
groupies hanging all over me.

Hey, get up.

Yeah, sorry,
I told you I was famous.

They were just bothering me.

You've really gotta get out
of the room more, Muqtada.

There's a whole
world out there.

It's just me. Put these on.
Let's go for a walk.

Oh, my goodness.

Sometimes it's just good
to get out of there.

Charlie, my friend.

You got 30 minutes.

Hey, what's the deal
with you and Noelle?

What do you mean? What do
you mean, what do I mean?

Don't play dumb with me.

The two of you are like...

Your energy is like...

Those were fireworks.

You should ask her out.

Ask her out? Yeah.

Ask her out. Like, out.

Well, I mean,

I like her,

but I think I'd be too
nervous to ask her out.

What are you nervous about?

Rejection.

Babe, you can't
live your life in fear.

You're gonna end up
like Muqtada.

Or worse, me.

That's the part where you go, "Hey, Bobby,
your life's not that bad," you know.

Oh, sorry, I'm just...

Relax. It's okay, babe.

But you shouldn't
worry about rejection.

You shouldn't.
You can practice with me.

Practice what?

Asking Noelle out.

No, that's okay.
Yeah, I'll be Noelle.

I'll be Noelle. I'm Noelle.

Uh...

Hey, Craig. How's it going?

Hey, Noelle.
I'm well. How are you?

Oh, good.

I get out of here soon,

which is pretty cool.

Do you like music?

Yeah, sure.

I like live music.

Uh, you just gonna sit there the
whole time you're asking her out?

Stand up. I'm a lady.

No, look man. You gotta
loosen up a little bit.

Come on, loosen up.

Yeah, okay. Good, good, good.

But I don't like to go see live music
by myself.

Oh, okay.

Well, maybe we
could go together?

"Well, okay, uh, maybe
we could go together?"

No. Say that again. You
gotta use more energy, man.

You gotta go like, "Oh!"
You gotta be excited.

Okay.

Yeah, uh... Yeah, okay. Well,
maybe we could go together.

Oh! Hmm.

Well, well, well.

Who should we see?

Um...

U2?

No.

No.

Vampire Weekend?

No, no, no. Don't be one
of those douche bags

that takes her to some band
that she doesn't care about.

This is what you do,
and this is very important.

Okay.

Ask her what she likes.

Right. Yeah.

Women like to be asked questions.
Okay.

Like ask me a question.
I'll be Noelle again.

Um...

Do a little flirtation
in the beginning.

What do you mean by that?

Comment on my shoes.

Oh, hey, Noelle, those shoes are awesome.
They really look nice.

Oh, you're sweet to say that.

It's nothing. Good.

You got it. You're getting it.
You're getting it.

Okay. Not bad.

How'd you end up in here?

Man, you don't give up, do you?

I'm on vacation.

Seriously.

I am serious.

Some people go to the Hamptons.
I come here.

Get a little R & R.

People feed you.

I get high sometimes, man.

That's not what
I heard about you.

What'd you hear?

I heard you tried to rape
a penguin at the zoo.

Who told you that?

Relax, babe.

Funny guy, huh?

Actually, I...

I heard your accountant say that
you tried to kill yourself.

Well, this may come as a surprise
to you, Cool Craig, but,

she ain't my accountant.

Gee, really?

And I've tried to
kill myself six times.

I thought about doing that,

but I couldn't
make it to the bridge.

I just came straight here.

What stopped you?

My family, I think. You know,
my parents and my sister.

Just knowing how bad
it would mess them up.

See, that's the part
I don't get, Craig.

I mean, you're cool, you're
smart, you're talented.

You have a family
that loves you.

You know, what I would do just
to be you, for just a day?

I would... l would do so much.

I would...

I don't know. I would just...

I'd just live.

Like it meant something.

Let's go.

Smitty, I found these
laying around somewhere.

What's going on?

Hey, Muqtada. Are you
coming out for a walk?

What is there to do?

Well, do you like to draw?

Ping-pong.

Ping what?

You like music?

Yes.

Okay. Great. Well, um...

Only Egypt music.

Oh, well, let's see.

Excuse me, if you please.
I am trying to rest.

Sol, have you met Muqtada?

If you could
please keep it down.

He has sensitive hearing.

This I think is enough
for one day.

Hey, Craig.

Hey.

Um, this is a surprise.

Me and Aaron broke up.

I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Uh, yeah. Sorry. Um...

You must be really loaded, huh?

Yeah. I'm pretty zonked.

So, you know I've been
thinking about you non-stop

since we talked on
the phone the other day.

I've been thinking
about you a lot, too.

I woke up and my bed
was on fire!

What's wrong with that guy?

He's schizophrenic.

Weird.

Anyway,

it's like you told me all this stuff
about you and you're really mature.

Not like everyone else with
their stupid little problems.

I mean, you're really,
really screwed up.

I'm a mess.

But in a good way. You know,
in the way that gives you

So you and Aaron broke up?

Okay, so I know I should
be thinking about Noelle,

and how I'm supposed to be
meeting her in 20 minutes.

But when you have a really
gorgeous girl in front of you,

and you've been obsessing
over her for two years,

and she's biting her lip and talking
low, and you've got a boner,

what are you gonna do?

Do you want to see my room?

You haven't finished that yet?

What?

Oh.

Yes, we have a lot of
activities here, so...

Takes up...

Me and Aaron never did
anything like this.

This was totally
on my checklist.

Is someone else in here?

I'm gonna be sick.

Sex!

Sex in my bed!

God, that's disgusting.

Children make sex in my bed!

Craig, who is this?

Um, this is my
roommate, Muqtada.

Don't talk to her!

She try and make sex in my bed!

Calm down. No one
was having sex, okay?

Woman is temptress! I know.

- What's wrong with you?
- Get out.

Uh, he's going
through a hard time.

No, you! What's wrong with you?

I'm also going
through a hard time.

Um, you know what?
You should get some rest,

and I'll call you
tomorrow or something.

Nia. Nia, wait.

Wait. Nia.

I love you.

Just get better, Craig.

No, I mean...

Noelle.

Noelle, please.

I'm sorry I messed up.

I love your portrait.
It's amazing.

I wish you'd open the door.

Are you okay?

Oh. Uh...

This is pretty cool, too.

So, our meeting tonight.

Is it safe to assume
that's not happening?

You've had it figured
out all along, Muqtada.

Never get out of the bed.

I got in.

In what?

In your mama.

Oh.

I got in the home.

That's great.

We missed you at breakfast.

Is this about this
whole Nia/Noelle fiasco?

How do you know about that?

Solomon. That dude's
got sensitive hearing.

Look, it's not
just women, okay?

I can't do anything right.
My life's a mess.

No, my life is a mess.

Muqtada's life is a mess.
No offense, babe.

All good, papa.

Look, I happen
to like you, Craig.

You remind me of me
when I was your age.

I was much better looking, and I didn't
have as much trouble with women...

Get back on track, man.

The point is, in 20 years,

if you're celebrating your
daughter's eighth birthday

in a place like this,

I swear to God,

Muqtada and I are going
to kick your ass.

He not busy being born,

is busy dying.

You need to believe that.

This Bobby,

I think, very wise man.

By the way, I was just
coming in to tell you that

I'm not gonna be
homeless tomorrow.

I'm just saying.

And guess what?

It's right next door
to the YMCA.

Yeah. So we can go swimming
in the swimming pool,

and maybe play table tennis.

Ping-pong, yes.

It's the same thing.

So listen, your mom will
bring you by on Saturday,

and we could have a feast.

There are so many people, you
know, not just in this hospital,

but in the whole world, who are
struggling so hard just to live.

And, it's like, self-indulgent for
me to not appreciate what I have.

Like what?

Well, there's my family,
my home, and my friends.

And you know, there's this.

I used to think art was just
bourgeois decadence, but...

It's really wonderful, Craig.

Thanks. Um...

Yeah, I've done
about 20 of them

and it's something
that I really enjoy.

What do you enjoy about it?

It's fun.

And it takes my mind off the
things that stress me out.

You gonna continue it
when you leave?

Yeah.

Or, I think.
But my dad might freak.

Have you told him how you feel?

Not yet.

But you will?

I think so.

Thank you.

It's my last
night tonight, Smitty.

It is your last night, Craig.

I hate to break it to you, Craig, but
I think I'm really gonna miss you.

Well, it's Bobby's
last night, too,

so I was wondering if we
could have a pizza party.

Yes, we can. Yeah. Do you have the money?
If you can get the money.

Yeah, no, I'll have
the money. Yeah, I...

You have records
you could bring?

Hey, um, thanks for coming.

I just wanted to say, I'm really
sorry about what happened yesterday.

That girl I was with, she's
my best friend's girlfriend.

I've been obsessed
with her forever and...

And you're in love with her?

No.

Well, of course not.
But you think she's hot,

so you told her what you
thought she'd want to hear.

And now you're going to
do the same thing to me.

No, I'm not.

You're not?

Look, um,
I do think you're hot.

And I do want to say
the right thing,

but that's only
because I really like you.

I like how you don't hide your
problems like everyone else.

And I feel like I don't have to
hide mine when I'm around you.

You know, I've been thinking
about it a lot recently,

and I've realized that

if you're not busy being born,
you're busy dying.

And I, for one, think that
we could both benefit from

being born, again.

Not being born again,
but you know what I mean?

Gee, thanks for
the wisdom, Bob.

What? He told you that, too?

Who? Bobby.

Yeah, me and about
a billion other people.

Bob Dylan.

It's the song you just quoted.

What? No. Yes.

Oh.

Anyway, my point is

I want to play doctor with you.

This is awesome.

So, how come you
never asked me why?

Why what?

I guess I just assumed you'd tell
me when you wanted me to know.

Thanks.

Do you like music?

Do you like breathing?

That's right.
It was a dumb question.

I like... l like Radiohead
a lot, the Pixies, T. Rex.

Oh, what else?

Have you seen them live?

I saw Radiohead
and the Pixies once.

Cool.

So, uh...

You know, Vampire Weekend's doing
a show at the end of the month.

Would you want to go?

Yes, I would.

With you, right?

No, with Solomon.

Yeah, with me.

Sorry guys. Um...

This is about to
get pretty sappy,

so I'm just gonna
give you the highlights.

This is me sharing
the realization that

I don't actually want to be
a CEO, lawyer, or President.

This is Noelle,

Laughing at the idea that I
once wanted to be President.

Here, Noelle suggests I "screw"

the Gates Summer application
if it makes me so unhappy.

This is me Liking that idea.

This is me thinking about
how to tell my dad.

This is after I tell Noelle
how beautiful I think she is.

Okay, just have them send the
delivery guy to the third floor.

3 North.

No problem, sport. You got it.

Thanks, Dad. Sure.

Yeah, I'll see you
and Mom tomorrow.

I'll see you then.

Okay, bye. Bye.

Hey, Muqtada.

Hello? Hey, man.

I could really use a favor.

Hey, found it.

I so appreciate this.

Yeah, no problem.

Look, man, I'm sorry
I was a bitch to you.

I'm sorry I tried to make
out with your girlfriend.

How are things with Nia?

Um, we're gonna try
and work through it.

Good.

You know, I might
hide it pretty well, but,

I mean, I get that depression
stuff, too, sometimes.

Yeah?

Don't kill yourself, okay?

I won't.

Seriously.

Thanks.

I'll call you tomorrow,
all right?

Yeah, you will.

Hey, um...

Did you really try
to make out with Nia?

Dick.

Pizza's getting cold.
What's up?

I'm tired, man.

Think I'll skip out
on the pizza shin-dig.

Pack up.

Ah, vacation's over.

Yes, back to work.

You got a job? No.

Well, congratulations
on your home.

Thanks.

You know, I used that
Dylan line on Noelle.

How'd it go?

Good. We're gonna
hang out soon.

Yeah? Maybe see some music.

Good.

Here.

It's you.

Yikes. It's a mess
in there, man.

Oh, it's not such a mess.

It's just
undergoing renovations.

Look, I wrote
my number on the back.

We should get together sometime,
play some table tennis.

Sure.

Cool. Well, I'll see you
tomorrow at breakfast.

Good luck, Craig.

Not that you need it, but...

Thanks. You, too, babe.

Hey, come on.

Trust me.

I gotta dance.

Excuse me?

I like this.

I like this. Yeah!

Look.

So long, buddy.

You should
probably stay longer.

You might lose it
on the outside.

Um, I'll take my chances.

It'll come to you!

Okay, I know you're
thinking, "What is this?"

"Kid spends a few days
in the hospital"

"and ail his problems
are cured?"

But I'm not. I know I'm not.

I can tell this is
just the beginning.

I still need to face my homework,
my school, my friends.

My dad.

Hello, Smitty. Hey, hey.

Thanks for everything. Yeah.

Sure. You're very welcome, sir.

Have you seen Bobby around?

Yeah, Bobby left
pretty early this morning.

But the difference between
today and last Saturday

is that for
the first time in a While,

I can look forward to the
things I want to do in my Life.

How you feeling?

I feel like...

Like I can handle it.

Bike, eat, drink, talk.

Ride the subway,
read, read maps.

Make maps, make art.

Finish the Gates application.

Tell my dad not
to stress about it.

Hug my mom.
Kiss my little sister.

Kiss my dad.

Make out with Noelle.

Make out with her more.

Take her on a picnic.
See a movie with her.

See a movie with Aaron.
Heck, see a movie With Nia.

Have a party. Tell people my story.
Volunteer at 3 North.

Help people Like Bobby.

Like Muqtada.

Like me.

Draw more. Draw a person.
Draw a naked person.

Draw Noelle naked.

Run, travel, swim, skip.

Yeah, I know it's lame,
but, Whatever.

Skip anyway.

Breathe.

Live.