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1
00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:14,927
[knocking on door]
2
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:18,366
Oh, hey, Dave!
3
00:00:18,409 --> 00:00:20,150
Come on in, buddy.
4
00:00:21,673 --> 00:00:23,066
Wow, you're in
a really good mood.
5
00:00:23,110 --> 00:00:26,678
I know. A new pothole
opened up on Jefferson,
6
00:00:26,722 --> 00:00:28,332
and it is tearing up
people's cars.
7
00:00:28,376 --> 00:00:31,161
They're breaking down
right in front of my shop.
8
00:00:31,205 --> 00:00:32,162
[chuckles]
9
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:33,859
Ain't God good?
10
00:00:35,078 --> 00:00:36,862
Okay, well, since
you're so happy,
11
00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:39,126
you won't mind if I
borrow a couple tools.
12
00:00:39,169 --> 00:00:40,214
Sure, what do you need?
13
00:00:40,257 --> 00:00:41,954
Okay, let's see.
14
00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:44,087
Here we go.
15
00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:46,611
Uh, all right.
Miter saw, belt sander,
16
00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:48,091
power drill,
carriage bolts,
17
00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:50,006
auger bits,
and the instruction manuals
18
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,182
on how to use all those things.
19
00:00:54,619 --> 00:00:56,926
Dave, I've told you a hundred
times, we are not building
20
00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:59,059
a bridge connecting our houses.
21
00:01:01,322 --> 00:01:04,238
It was not a bridge,
it was a catwalk.
22
00:01:06,631 --> 00:01:08,764
But this is about
something else. Okay.
23
00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:11,071
Grover has been begging me
for a tree house,
24
00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:13,116
and since he's visiting
his grandmother for a few days,
25
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,554
I thought I'd surprise him
with one when he gets home.
26
00:01:16,598 --> 00:01:18,121
A tree house, huh?
27
00:01:18,165 --> 00:01:20,515
I remember the one
I built for Malcolm and Marty.
28
00:01:20,558 --> 00:01:22,299
That thing was amazing.
29
00:01:22,343 --> 00:01:24,997
Well, I've got some pretty
exciting plans myself.
30
00:01:25,041 --> 00:01:28,262
Two words: bird feeder.
31
00:01:30,612 --> 00:01:33,876
I got two words for you:
poor Grover.
32
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,096
Aw, man.
33
00:01:36,139 --> 00:01:38,576
You should've seen
the one I built.
34
00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,361
It had a lookout perch,
35
00:01:40,404 --> 00:01:41,840
a rope swing.
36
00:01:41,884 --> 00:01:45,192
It even had a secret door
that led to a slide.
37
00:01:45,235 --> 00:01:48,238
I can't believe I'm saying this,
but screw feeding the birds.
38
00:01:48,282 --> 00:01:51,111
Yeah, man, the boys spent
the entire summer up there.
39
00:01:51,154 --> 00:01:52,503
By the time they came down,
40
00:01:52,547 --> 00:01:56,377
Marty needed longer pants
and Malcolm had a goatee.
41
00:01:57,291 --> 00:01:59,467
Well, Calvin,
that sounds awesome. Hey--
42
00:01:59,510 --> 00:02:00,990
is there any chance
that you would help me
43
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:02,513
build Grover's tree house?
44
00:02:02,557 --> 00:02:04,080
Hmm.
45
00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:08,998
This may be the pothole
talking, but I'd love to.
46
00:02:09,041 --> 00:02:10,739
You know what, I got
some extra wood in my garage,
47
00:02:10,782 --> 00:02:11,957
and anything else we need,
48
00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,524
we can get
at the hardware store.
49
00:02:13,568 --> 00:02:16,048
Okay, perfect. Also, we can
swing by the pet store.
50
00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:18,834
I have 200 pounds
of birdseed to return.
51
00:02:20,792 --> 00:02:22,925
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
52
00:02:22,968 --> 00:02:24,144
♪ Welcome to the hood.
53
00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:30,802
Wow, you really know your
way around Home Warehouse.
54
00:02:30,846 --> 00:02:32,282
You found everything
so quickly.
55
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:33,805
Everything except you.
56
00:02:33,849 --> 00:02:36,678
Where the hell did you
disappear to for so long?
57
00:02:36,721 --> 00:02:38,332
Sorry. Any time I see
a plant section,
58
00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:41,291
I like to pretend
that I'm lost in the jungle.
59
00:02:42,901 --> 00:02:45,077
Hey, guys. Oh, nice.
60
00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:46,470
Dave, I see
you finally talked my dad
61
00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:48,298
into building that catwalk.
62
00:02:48,342 --> 00:02:50,170
Wrong.
63
00:02:50,213 --> 00:02:53,173
I'm helping Dave
build a tree house for Grover,
64
00:02:53,216 --> 00:02:55,523
just like the one I built
for you and Malcolm.
65
00:02:55,566 --> 00:02:57,133
Oh, really? That's fantastic.
66
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:59,396
Yeah, you know, just thinking
about it brings back
67
00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:03,008
a lot of happy memories
of you boys playing in yours.
68
00:03:03,052 --> 00:03:04,923
Yeah, me too, Dad.
[chuckles]
69
00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:08,710
Man, see, that is exactly
the kind of memories
70
00:03:08,753 --> 00:03:10,233
that I want to have with Grover.
71
00:03:10,277 --> 00:03:12,061
Aw, man, well, you won't
if you let my dad build it,
72
00:03:12,104 --> 00:03:14,019
because Grover will be dead.
73
00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:18,023
W-What are you talking about?
74
00:03:18,067 --> 00:03:19,199
Trust me, man,
the one that my dad
75
00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:20,591
built for us was a nightmare.
76
00:03:20,635 --> 00:03:22,027
It had a hole in the floor,
77
00:03:22,071 --> 00:03:23,986
splinters everywhere,
nails poking out.
78
00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:26,336
It was like playing inside
a knife drawer.
79
00:03:26,380 --> 00:03:27,903
[stammers]
80
00:03:27,946 --> 00:03:29,513
I mean, what am I
supposed to do?
81
00:03:29,557 --> 00:03:32,299
I mean, your dad is so excited,
I can't ask him to stop now.
82
00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:34,388
Well, in that case,
the only thing you should do
83
00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:38,174
is use this saw
to cut down your tree.
84
00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,872
No, wait. You know what? No.
Marty, you're an engineer.
85
00:03:40,916 --> 00:03:44,398
Look, you can help us build it
and make sure that it's safe.
86
00:03:44,441 --> 00:03:47,270
Dude, are you kidding me?
If my dad finds out you asked me
87
00:03:47,314 --> 00:03:49,229
to supervise his work,
he'll be furious.
88
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:50,708
Well, then,
he doesn't need to know.
89
00:03:50,752 --> 00:03:53,407
Just swing by and make
a few casual suggestions.
90
00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:55,496
Then you're not stepping
on his toes.
91
00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:58,673
And more importantly,
Grover won't lose any of his.
92
00:03:58,716 --> 00:04:00,762
I don't know, man.
93
00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,285
Good news, Dave!
94
00:04:02,329 --> 00:04:04,548
I figured out a way
we can run a zip line
95
00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:07,072
from the roof to the tree house.
96
00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:09,423
We just got to get around
those power lines.
97
00:04:14,471 --> 00:04:15,820
So, 1:00 okay for you?
98
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:20,216
Yes...
99
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:25,177
Hey, Tina. Here's the
flour you asked for.
100
00:04:25,221 --> 00:04:26,788
I brought all I had
because I didn't know
101
00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:29,965
how many cups
were in a "crapload."
102
00:04:30,008 --> 00:04:31,923
Great. Did you also
bring the butter?
103
00:04:31,967 --> 00:04:33,577
No, sorry, I was out.
104
00:04:33,621 --> 00:04:36,972
Alexa, add a crapload of butter
to my shopping list.
105
00:04:37,015 --> 00:04:38,930
ALEXA:
I've added a crapload of butter
106
00:04:38,974 --> 00:04:40,976
to your shopping list.
107
00:04:42,064 --> 00:04:44,022
Did you program her to say that?
108
00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:46,460
No. She just gets me.
109
00:04:48,592 --> 00:04:50,507
So, what's with all the cookies?
110
00:04:50,551 --> 00:04:53,162
[sighs] Well,
like an idiot, I volunteered
111
00:04:53,205 --> 00:04:55,947
to make 400 of them
for the church bake sale.
112
00:04:55,991 --> 00:04:58,210
400? That's crazy.Mm.
113
00:04:58,254 --> 00:05:00,996
I know, but Sister Thompson
made 300 last year,
114
00:05:01,039 --> 00:05:03,303
and I thought embarrassing
that stuck-up old hag
115
00:05:03,346 --> 00:05:05,392
would be
the Christian thing to do.
116
00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:07,002
[laughs]
117
00:05:07,045 --> 00:05:08,482
Well, if you need some help,
118
00:05:08,525 --> 00:05:10,614
I'd be happy
to make some for you.
119
00:05:10,658 --> 00:05:12,529
Oh, really?
Sure.
120
00:05:12,573 --> 00:05:14,009
I love to bake.
121
00:05:14,052 --> 00:05:15,489
You know, when Grover
was little, I used to...
122
00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:17,360
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Less chatter, more batter.
123
00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,014
Okay.
124
00:05:22,365 --> 00:05:23,758
[chuckles]
125
00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:27,370
What do you say, Dave?
You looking level on your side?
126
00:05:27,414 --> 00:05:29,329
Not really.
127
00:05:29,372 --> 00:05:32,332
Ah, don't beat yourself up.
Mine isn't, either.
128
00:05:32,375 --> 00:05:33,463
[chuckles]
129
00:05:33,507 --> 00:05:35,073
Hey, guys.
130
00:05:35,117 --> 00:05:36,988
Oh, look who's here.
131
00:05:37,032 --> 00:05:39,382
It's Marty, showing up
completely on his own.
132
00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:42,820
Right on time,
but totally unplanned.
133
00:05:42,864 --> 00:05:45,475
Yeah, I just figured I'd drop by
and see how you guys were doing.
134
00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:48,826
Oh, great. We're halfway done
with the floor.
135
00:05:48,870 --> 00:05:51,089
Yeah, uh, that's right, uh...
136
00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:53,657
I got to levelwith you,
Marty, I can
137
00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:58,532
not evenbelieve
how well it's going.
138
00:05:58,575 --> 00:06:00,664
Well, actually,
from where I'm standing,
139
00:06:00,708 --> 00:06:02,666
i-it looks a little slanted.
140
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:06,017
Oh.
Eh, maybe.
141
00:06:06,061 --> 00:06:07,279
But trust me,
it'll look straight
142
00:06:07,323 --> 00:06:09,151
when it's 12 feet in the air.
143
00:06:09,194 --> 00:06:11,240
So-so, when you
get it up there,
144
00:06:11,283 --> 00:06:13,024
what are you gonna use
to support it? Is--
145
00:06:13,068 --> 00:06:15,200
You gonna use braces
or a cantilever system?
146
00:06:15,244 --> 00:06:17,551
Oh, a cantilever system.
You know what's crazy?
147
00:06:17,594 --> 00:06:21,032
Grover was just
asking for one of those.
148
00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:22,599
No, man, don't worry
about that stuff.
149
00:06:22,643 --> 00:06:24,862
I got something
way sturdier in mind.
150
00:06:24,906 --> 00:06:26,603
Oh. W-What?
151
00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:28,388
I'm gonna nail it to that branch
152
00:06:28,431 --> 00:06:30,302
and then I'm-a tie a
bungee cord and run it
153
00:06:30,346 --> 00:06:33,480
all the way over to
that telephone pole.
154
00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:37,527
Yeah, I got to say, Dad,
from an engineering standpoint,
155
00:06:37,571 --> 00:06:39,703
that doesn't sound
super safe to me.
156
00:06:39,747 --> 00:06:41,531
You're probably right.
157
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:43,228
Two bungee cords it is.
158
00:06:43,272 --> 00:06:45,535
Yeah, uh, I don't know, Calvin.
159
00:06:45,579 --> 00:06:48,538
I-I think Marty is making
some pretty good points.
160
00:06:48,582 --> 00:06:50,105
Yeah, speaking of points,
161
00:06:50,148 --> 00:06:53,238
maybe we should hammer down
some of these exposed nails.
162
00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:55,066
What are you
talking about?
163
00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,894
That's a built-in
security system
164
00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:59,070
to keep the squirrels out.
165
00:06:59,854 --> 00:07:01,333
I don't know, Calvin, uh,
166
00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:04,119
I think I'm leaning
towards Marty's suggestion.
167
00:07:04,162 --> 00:07:06,469
It feels a little bit
less tetanusy.
168
00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:09,603
All right, fine,
we'll hammer in the nails.
169
00:07:09,646 --> 00:07:11,648
Good. Y-You know,
170
00:07:11,692 --> 00:07:13,476
the squirrels probably
won't even be a problem.
171
00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,913
I know. 'Cause I'm-a
put barbed wire
172
00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:18,481
all around this
thing instead.
173
00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:20,222
Good idea, fellas.
174
00:07:23,138 --> 00:07:27,969
Alexa, set cookie timer
for 12 minutes.
175
00:07:28,012 --> 00:07:30,798
ALEXA:
Cookie timer set for 12 minutes.
176
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:33,104
Girl, you are such a big help.
177
00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:37,282
Now, if you could talk trash
and drink wine, we could hang.
178
00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:39,807
Okay, here you go.
179
00:07:39,850 --> 00:07:42,070
100 vegan carob chip cookies.
180
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:43,898
What?
[laughs]
I'm kidding.
181
00:07:43,941 --> 00:07:45,769
These are so unhealthy,
182
00:07:45,813 --> 00:07:49,294
there's a little heart
attack in each one.
183
00:07:49,338 --> 00:07:53,342
Hey, Mom, did you hear
the bad news about Mr. Pickett?
184
00:07:53,385 --> 00:07:55,475
Oh, he fell down
the stairs and-- Oh!
185
00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:57,215
Cookies.
186
00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:00,349
Mmm.
187
00:08:00,392 --> 00:08:01,785
Oh, my God.
[laughs]
188
00:08:01,829 --> 00:08:04,745
Mom, these are the best cookies
you ever made.
189
00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:07,225
Excuse me?
190
00:08:07,269 --> 00:08:09,227
I'm serious, Ma.
191
00:08:09,271 --> 00:08:10,664
I don't know
what you did different,
192
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:13,144
but these right here
put all your other cookies
193
00:08:13,188 --> 00:08:14,276
to shame.
194
00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:16,104
[laughs] Mmm.
195
00:08:16,147 --> 00:08:18,976
Actually, I baked that batch.
196
00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:21,239
[clears throat]
You say what now?
197
00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:27,681
Those are hers.
198
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:32,424
You know what?
[coughs]
199
00:08:32,468 --> 00:08:34,209
I spoke way too soon.
200
00:08:34,252 --> 00:08:35,993
Let me go ahead
and try one of yours.
201
00:08:36,037 --> 00:08:40,171
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
202
00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:42,347
You see? I was wrong.
203
00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:44,654
I was wrong.
These are way better.
204
00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:46,743
[laughs]
205
00:08:46,787 --> 00:08:48,528
Still Gemma's.
206
00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:53,620
You know what?
207
00:08:53,663 --> 00:08:56,448
Let me try one of these right...Just get out of here!
208
00:08:58,886 --> 00:09:00,017
[thudding]
209
00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:02,193
[laughs]
Look at that floor.
210
00:09:02,237 --> 00:09:03,847
Solid as a rock.
211
00:09:03,891 --> 00:09:06,502
I told you that dead branch
was strong enough to hold it.
212
00:09:07,503 --> 00:09:08,896
Yeah, uh,
213
00:09:08,939 --> 00:09:10,245
lucky for us you spotted it
214
00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:13,857
so very, very high
up in the tree.
215
00:09:13,901 --> 00:09:16,686
Oh, know what we should do,
216
00:09:16,730 --> 00:09:19,080
is get a steel pipe
and put it on the roof
217
00:09:19,123 --> 00:09:21,256
so Grover can fly a pirate flag.
218
00:09:21,299 --> 00:09:23,475
Oh, that's a great idea.
219
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:25,042
No kid's wooden fort
is complete
220
00:09:25,086 --> 00:09:27,567
without a lightning rod
attached to it.
221
00:09:27,610 --> 00:09:30,874
Now, you see a problem,
I see free electricity.
222
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,397
Yeah...
223
00:09:32,441 --> 00:09:34,965
You know, though, maybe
we skip the flagpole.
224
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:37,707
Yeah, Grover's not into
pirates anymore anyway.
225
00:09:37,751 --> 00:09:39,100
Oh, that's too bad.
226
00:09:39,143 --> 00:09:40,841
I see at least
three planks up there
227
00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:42,799
just begging
to be walked off.
228
00:09:44,975 --> 00:09:46,368
What's your deal, Marty?
229
00:09:46,411 --> 00:09:48,500
Why you keep criticizing
everything I do?
230
00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:50,894
Well, i-it's not about you, Dad.
I'm just looking out for Grover.
231
00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:53,593
You know what?
I-I like the sound of that.
232
00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:55,507
You know, Grover
has very delicate bones.
233
00:09:55,551 --> 00:09:59,163
He's... he's basically
like a little baby bird.
234
00:10:00,295 --> 00:10:02,819
Eh, the only baby
around here is Marty.
235
00:10:02,863 --> 00:10:05,474
"Wah, the floor is uneven."
236
00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:08,564
"Wah, lightning's bad for you."
237
00:10:09,478 --> 00:10:11,436
I'm just trying to make it safe.
238
00:10:11,480 --> 00:10:14,614
No, what you're doing
is trying to make it boring.
239
00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:17,051
Half the fun of a tree house
is taking some risk.
240
00:10:17,094 --> 00:10:19,096
A little sense of adventure.
241
00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:21,272
When did you become so soft?
242
00:10:22,099 --> 00:10:23,666
I'm not soft, Dad.
243
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:25,494
I'm just trying to stop
this tree house from being
244
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:27,670
an even bigger disaster
than the one you built us.
245
00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:30,064
What are you talking about?
You loved that tree house.
246
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:32,936
No, man, I hated it. That thing
was way too dangerous.
247
00:10:32,980 --> 00:10:36,200
Name one thing that was
dangerous about it.
248
00:10:36,244 --> 00:10:39,639
Dad, you built it
over a barbecue pit.
249
00:10:42,206 --> 00:10:44,165
It's called heated floors.
250
00:10:45,383 --> 00:10:47,472
G-Guys, please stop arguing.
251
00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,431
Look, I'm not arguing,
I'm just realizing
252
00:10:49,474 --> 00:10:51,476
how ungrateful my son is.
253
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,304
Yeah, and I'm just realizing
how reckless
254
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:55,089
and irresponsible my dad is.
255
00:10:55,132 --> 00:10:57,308
You know what, Marty, what-what
are you even doing here?
256
00:10:57,352 --> 00:10:59,049
Nobody invited you.
Right, Dave?
257
00:10:59,093 --> 00:11:03,271
Yeah, totally uninvited, but at
the same time, very welcome.
258
00:11:05,012 --> 00:11:08,711
Yeah, fine, you guys don't want
my help, I'm out of here.
259
00:11:08,755 --> 00:11:10,844
I was just trying to keep
Grover safe.
260
00:11:10,887 --> 00:11:13,237
Well, you don't have
to worry about that,
261
00:11:13,281 --> 00:11:14,761
because when it comes
to tree houses,
262
00:11:14,804 --> 00:11:16,719
nobody builds 'em
better than me.
263
00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:19,591
Oh!
264
00:11:19,635 --> 00:11:22,507
Boom. There's your
rope swing right there.
265
00:11:29,297 --> 00:11:31,560
[knock on door]
266
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:37,609
Hey, Dave, what's up?
267
00:11:37,653 --> 00:11:39,611
And if you say the tree house,
I will be shocked.
268
00:11:40,830 --> 00:11:43,659
I came over to apologize
for yesterday.
269
00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:45,269
The last thing I wanted
was to cause
270
00:11:45,313 --> 00:11:47,228
a fight
between you and your dad.
271
00:11:47,271 --> 00:11:48,577
I mean, you didn't
start that fight.
272
00:11:48,620 --> 00:11:50,579
He did when he called me soft.
273
00:11:50,622 --> 00:11:53,060
It's messed up.Yeah, I totally get it.
274
00:11:53,103 --> 00:11:56,759
I'd hate it if Calvin
ever thought I were soft.
275
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,852
But come on, Marty,
I need you to come back.
276
00:12:02,896 --> 00:12:04,158
For Grover's sake.
277
00:12:04,201 --> 00:12:05,463
How bad is it?
278
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:08,292
It is a nightmare.
He's over there right now
279
00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:09,641
trying to get a diving board
280
00:12:09,685 --> 00:12:11,643
to reach the neighbors'
swimming pool.
281
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,735
Dave, I tried to help, man.
You saw what happened.
282
00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:19,347
I know, and I should have
backed you up, but...
283
00:12:19,390 --> 00:12:20,740
but it's hard.
284
00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:22,306
Your dad's heart is
in the right place,
285
00:12:22,350 --> 00:12:25,875
even though I'm pretty sure
his support beams are not.
286
00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,009
Well,
287
00:12:29,052 --> 00:12:30,401
if you want me to come back,
288
00:12:30,445 --> 00:12:32,534
you're gonna have to make my dad
do things my way.
289
00:12:32,577 --> 00:12:34,144
Absolutely. Look, Marty,
290
00:12:34,188 --> 00:12:36,756
from now on, you are in charge,
no matter what.
291
00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:38,845
Okay, good. But we better get
over there quick
292
00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:40,803
because the neighbors drained
that pool two years ago.
293
00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:42,805
Oh...
294
00:12:47,157 --> 00:12:49,594
Hey. Okay for me to come in?
295
00:12:49,638 --> 00:12:51,074
Of course, Gemma,
why wouldn't it be?
296
00:12:51,118 --> 00:12:53,642
I don't know,
I was worried you might still be
297
00:12:53,685 --> 00:12:56,471
upset about that whole cookie
thing yesterday.
298
00:12:56,514 --> 00:12:59,343
Ah, please, they're just
silly cookies
299
00:12:59,387 --> 00:13:01,781
that I've baked for Malcolm
his whole life,
300
00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:06,046
ever since I squeezed his sorry
ass out of my damn body.
301
00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:07,612
I know, I'm sorry.
302
00:13:07,656 --> 00:13:09,789
No, no, it's not your fault.
303
00:13:09,832 --> 00:13:12,139
Malcolm was right,
your cookies were delicious.
304
00:13:12,182 --> 00:13:13,401
Thanks.
305
00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:15,620
You're welcome. And besides,
306
00:13:15,664 --> 00:13:17,797
obviously it was just a fluke.
307
00:13:20,190 --> 00:13:21,801
What do you mean, a fluke?
308
00:13:21,844 --> 00:13:24,412
Oh, I'm sorry, Gemma,
I didn't mean it like that.
309
00:13:24,455 --> 00:13:25,848
I'm just saying,
everyone knows that
310
00:13:25,892 --> 00:13:28,329
my cookies eat yours
for breakfast.
311
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:32,376
Well, everyone might know,
312
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:34,857
but clearly Malcolm doesn't.
313
00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:41,081
Okay, okay.
314
00:13:41,124 --> 00:13:44,258
Well, it sounds like there's
only one way to settle this.
315
00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:45,520
You talking bake-off?
316
00:13:45,563 --> 00:13:48,479
Oh, you know it.
Name your cookie.
317
00:13:48,523 --> 00:13:52,092
Shortbread?
Snickerdoodle?
318
00:13:52,135 --> 00:13:56,444
If we're gonna do it,
let's go all the way.
319
00:13:56,487 --> 00:13:58,228
You talking oatmeal?
320
00:13:58,272 --> 00:14:02,667
With raisins.
321
00:14:02,711 --> 00:14:06,671
Is there any other way?
322
00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:09,196
Actually, sometimes they
use chocolate chips.
323
00:14:09,239 --> 00:14:11,546
Oh, that sounds yummy.
Let's do that instead.
Okay.
324
00:14:16,986 --> 00:14:18,466
Hey, Dad.
325
00:14:18,509 --> 00:14:22,992
Oh, look who's back,
the building inspector.
326
00:14:23,036 --> 00:14:25,995
Actually, Calvin,
I asked Marty to come back.
327
00:14:26,039 --> 00:14:27,388
Why would you do that?
328
00:14:27,431 --> 00:14:29,651
Look, I know you're just
trying to make this place
329
00:14:29,694 --> 00:14:32,872
as much fun as possible
for Grover, but...
330
00:14:32,915 --> 00:14:36,440
it would be nice if he were
actually alive to enjoy it.
331
00:14:36,484 --> 00:14:39,922
Seriously?
You're taking his side?
332
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,924
Look, Calvin,
there are no sides.
333
00:14:41,968 --> 00:14:43,578
Yeah, like this place
when somebody sneezes
334
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:45,058
and the walls fall down.
335
00:14:46,059 --> 00:14:47,408
Know what? Fine.
336
00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:49,018
If neither of you think
that I can do this,
337
00:14:49,062 --> 00:14:49,976
then I'm out of here.
338
00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:54,023
But I'm taking my nail with me.
339
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:57,026
[loud creaking]
340
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:58,375
What was that?
341
00:14:58,419 --> 00:15:00,551
Oh, relax.
It's just the floor
342
00:15:00,595 --> 00:15:01,901
settling onto the tree.
343
00:15:01,944 --> 00:15:04,033
Now it's even more rock-solid.
344
00:15:04,077 --> 00:15:06,557
[loud cracking]
345
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:12,041
M-Maybe I should put this nail
back where it, where it was.
346
00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:14,087
[all shout]
347
00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:18,047
Okay.
348
00:15:18,091 --> 00:15:19,048
I got to admit,
349
00:15:19,092 --> 00:15:20,876
now the floor is
a little slanted.
350
00:15:24,271 --> 00:15:26,447
[knocking]
351
00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:28,928
Whoa. [clears throat]
352
00:15:30,059 --> 00:15:32,018
Hey, ladies...Enough small talk.
353
00:15:32,061 --> 00:15:34,107
We need you to settle a bet.Mm-hmm.
354
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:36,413
Uh, what bet?
355
00:15:36,457 --> 00:15:38,415
We both baked
one of these cookies.
356
00:15:38,459 --> 00:15:39,764
All you have to do
is taste them
357
00:15:39,808 --> 00:15:41,636
and tell us which one
you like better.
358
00:15:41,679 --> 00:15:44,160
And God help you
if you get it wrong.
359
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:46,771
You know, actually,
I am kind of busy right now.
360
00:15:46,815 --> 00:15:48,948
But you know who loves cookies?
361
00:15:48,991 --> 00:15:50,427
Marty. I'm gonna go find him.
362
00:15:50,471 --> 00:15:52,603
Nice try, Malcolm.
Yeah.
363
00:15:52,647 --> 00:15:55,128
Now be a man and eat
your milk and cookies!
364
00:15:57,347 --> 00:15:59,959
All right, fine.
365
00:16:04,224 --> 00:16:05,921
Mmm.
366
00:16:12,319 --> 00:16:13,494
So, which is better?
367
00:16:13,537 --> 00:16:14,974
Well...
368
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:17,933
I hate to disappoint
either of you, but...
369
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,457
it's a tie-- everybody wins!
370
00:16:20,501 --> 00:16:22,329
Malcolm!
371
00:16:22,372 --> 00:16:24,157
All right, Ma.
372
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,028
If I had to choose,
373
00:16:26,072 --> 00:16:28,639
I pick this one.
374
00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:31,207
Boom! Hey!
375
00:16:31,251 --> 00:16:35,168
Somebody call Keebler and tell
'em there's a new elf in town!
376
00:16:40,347 --> 00:16:42,175
Well, congratulations.
377
00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:45,221
I guess you were right,
my cookies were just a fluke.
378
00:16:45,265 --> 00:16:47,963
I'm sorry, Gemma,
I never should've said that.
379
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,661
I just overreacted
because I'm Malcolm's mom.
380
00:16:50,705 --> 00:16:52,576
And, you know, every mama wants
381
00:16:52,620 --> 00:16:54,796
her baby to like
her cookies best.
382
00:16:54,839 --> 00:16:58,408
I get it, and I'm glad
he picked yours.
383
00:16:58,452 --> 00:16:59,888
Thank you.
384
00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:01,411
And thank you, Malcolm.
385
00:17:01,455 --> 00:17:03,979
Now I'm gonna go put
your baby pictures back up.
386
00:17:06,851 --> 00:17:10,333
Look, I'm sorry, Gemma.
Your cookie was good, too.
387
00:17:10,377 --> 00:17:13,162
It just had a bit of, um,
a strange aftertaste.
388
00:17:13,206 --> 00:17:16,600
I hope so. I put in
a crapload of pickle juice.
389
00:17:17,471 --> 00:17:19,690
Pickle juice?
Why would you put pickle juice
390
00:17:19,734 --> 00:17:21,170
in an oatmeal cookie?
391
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:23,042
Because I'm a mama, too.
392
00:17:23,085 --> 00:17:25,348
Like your mom said,
we all want our babies
393
00:17:25,392 --> 00:17:27,394
to like our cookies best.
394
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:28,525
[chuckles]
395
00:17:28,569 --> 00:17:30,223
You're a good friend, Gemma.
396
00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:33,139
Not that good. At first, I was
going to put it in her cookie.
397
00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:37,273
[tree house creaking]
398
00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:41,190
Okay, nobody move or this thing
is gonna collapse.
399
00:17:41,234 --> 00:17:42,887
All right, now I know
how this looks, but I built
400
00:17:42,931 --> 00:17:44,411
this thing for a couple
of little kids.
401
00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:46,108
Not three grown men.
402
00:17:46,935 --> 00:17:48,545
That being said,
I probably could've used
403
00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:50,025
a few more bungee cords.
404
00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:53,376
Okay, so what
do we do now?
405
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:56,205
And if you're gonna say
pee your pants, well...
406
00:17:56,249 --> 00:17:57,380
mission accomplished.
407
00:17:57,424 --> 00:17:59,339
Well, Marty,
you're an engineer.
408
00:17:59,382 --> 00:18:01,950
If anybody can figure a way
to get us out of here, it's you.
409
00:18:01,993 --> 00:18:05,127
Okay, okay, okay, uh...
all right, I-I think I got it.
410
00:18:05,171 --> 00:18:07,956
Um, if-if we coordinate
our movements
411
00:18:07,999 --> 00:18:10,263
and redistribute
our body weight, that should
412
00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:12,743
counterbalance the floor
until we can each get out.
413
00:18:12,787 --> 00:18:15,181
Great idea.
And may I say,
414
00:18:15,224 --> 00:18:17,139
as a professional
conflict mediator,
415
00:18:17,183 --> 00:18:19,924
an excellent team-building
exercise.
416
00:18:19,968 --> 00:18:23,058
You know...
Okay, all right.
417
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:24,320
You might want to hurry
this thing up.
418
00:18:24,364 --> 00:18:25,713
This tree is getting sick
of Dave, too.
419
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:27,889
Okay... okay, Dave?
420
00:18:27,932 --> 00:18:30,370
You're closest to the door.
I'm gonna slide two steps
421
00:18:30,413 --> 00:18:32,589
to the left, Dad, you take
two steps to the right.
422
00:18:32,633 --> 00:18:34,504
That should balance the floor.
423
00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:36,071
Ready?
424
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,682
Go!
425
00:18:38,726 --> 00:18:40,815
All right.
426
00:18:40,858 --> 00:18:43,339
Okay, all right,
Dave, you climb out.
427
00:18:43,383 --> 00:18:46,037
Dad, as soon as he does,
you take another step
428
00:18:46,081 --> 00:18:48,214
to the left.
I'm gonna take two steps back.
429
00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:51,782
Oh, so this is like the Electric
Slide meets the Cupid Shuffle.
430
00:18:51,826 --> 00:18:53,784
No, Dad, Dad, no!
431
00:18:53,828 --> 00:18:55,395
Oh, my God.
[stammers]
432
00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:56,874
Oh, oh, ooh!
433
00:18:56,918 --> 00:18:59,660
That-That-That's on me
right there.
434
00:19:00,661 --> 00:19:02,402
Okay, Dave, go!
435
00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:03,794
Okay.
436
00:19:03,838 --> 00:19:06,057
And for the record,
there are
437
00:19:06,101 --> 00:19:08,059
no two men that I'd rather be
trapped in a tree house
438
00:19:08,103 --> 00:19:10,323
with than the two of you!Get out of here!
439
00:19:15,545 --> 00:19:16,503
Okay, Dad.
440
00:19:16,546 --> 00:19:17,808
It's your turn.
441
00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:19,070
No, son, you go.
442
00:19:19,114 --> 00:19:20,768
All right, this is my fault.
443
00:19:20,811 --> 00:19:22,204
If I had listened
to your suggestions,
444
00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:24,467
we wouldn't be here
in the first place.
445
00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:26,034
I just got carried away.
446
00:19:26,077 --> 00:19:29,298
It's okay, man. You were
just trying to make it fun.
447
00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:31,431
The same way you did
when you built ours.
448
00:19:31,474 --> 00:19:32,736
Thanks.
449
00:19:32,780 --> 00:19:34,782
And I shouldn't have
called you soft,
450
00:19:34,825 --> 00:19:36,392
because you're not.
451
00:19:36,436 --> 00:19:38,220
You mean that?
452
00:19:38,264 --> 00:19:39,917
Yeah. I mean,
453
00:19:39,961 --> 00:19:41,702
the way you kept your cool
and figured out
454
00:19:41,745 --> 00:19:43,617
a way to get us out of here,
455
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:45,271
there's nothing soft about that.
456
00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:47,577
Thanks, Dad.
457
00:19:47,621 --> 00:19:49,797
Bring it in, son.
458
00:19:50,885 --> 00:19:52,452
All right, whoa,
whoa, whoa, okay.
459
00:19:52,495 --> 00:19:54,715
Bring it out, bring it out!
460
00:19:59,807 --> 00:20:02,853
Okay, okay, Dad, I'm going.
461
00:20:02,897 --> 00:20:04,725
I'll see you
on the ground.
462
00:20:04,768 --> 00:20:06,944
One way or the other.
463
00:20:09,295 --> 00:20:11,297
[muttering]
464
00:20:14,822 --> 00:20:16,606
Damn.
465
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:19,348
Why did I let Dave go first?
466
00:20:26,703 --> 00:20:29,445
You were right, this is a much
better idea than the one I had.
467
00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:31,534
True. Although I would've
loved to see my dad try
468
00:20:31,578 --> 00:20:33,971
to Mary Poppins his way down
with your beach umbrella.
469
00:20:34,015 --> 00:20:36,322
Calvin, you okay up there?
470
00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:38,976
Yeah, but I'm running out
of time!
471
00:20:39,020 --> 00:20:40,761
When's that umbrella coming?
472
00:20:40,804 --> 00:20:42,415
Okay... change of plans.
473
00:20:42,458 --> 00:20:44,286
We've got some mattresses
for you to land on!
474
00:20:44,330 --> 00:20:46,593
[tree house crackling, rumbling]
475
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:49,465
Dad, you got to jump now!
476
00:20:49,509 --> 00:20:52,381
A squirrel just did
and I think he knows something.
477
00:20:54,905 --> 00:20:57,517
All right, here I come!
478
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,260
Just remember,
you're the Black Bruce Willis.
479
00:21:02,522 --> 00:21:05,264
Yippee ki-yay, mother brother!
480
00:21:10,094 --> 00:21:15,012
Captioning sponsored by
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481
00:21:15,056 --> 00:21:16,362
and TOYOTA.
482
00:21:19,626 --> 00:21:22,019
Captioned by
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