Original subtitles

Kind: captions Language: en

straight

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] or like two peeled honeydew melons

or like two peeled honeydew melons

or like two peeled honeydew melons what are you staring at fat astrid

what are you staring at fat astrid

what are you staring at fat astrid let's go babe

if you need any more coffees anytime

if you need any more coffees anytime

if you need any more coffees anytime just let me know okay yeah for sure yeah

just let me know okay yeah for sure yeah

just let me know okay yeah for sure yeah so are you uh getting back into acting

so are you uh getting back into acting

so are you uh getting back into acting [Music]

[Music]

[Music] you know you're not as subtle as you

you know you're not as subtle as you

you know you're not as subtle as you think you are uh uh

think you are uh uh

think you are uh uh so you're talking to me now i never

so you're talking to me now i never

so you're talking to me now i never didn't talk to you

didn't talk to you

didn't talk to you okay

okay

okay ever since you got cool and i got fat we

ever since you got cool and i got fat we

ever since you got cool and i got fat we haven't exactly been funniest it's not

haven't exactly been funniest it's not

haven't exactly been funniest it's not like you've given me the time of day

like you've given me the time of day

like you've given me the time of day since or came to town

so um

so um

so um do you

do you

do you do you have any leads

do you have any leads

do you have any leads let's say dvd

let's say dvd

let's say dvd you've heard anything from him

you've heard anything from him

you've heard anything from him you tell me the other creeper stalking

you tell me the other creeper stalking

you tell me the other creeper stalking everyone around town right right cool

everyone around town right right cool

everyone around town right right cool have a nice night

have a nice night

have a nice night sorry um

sorry um

sorry um no offense

i i heard about the punch patrol thing

i i heard about the punch patrol thing

i i heard about the punch patrol thing i'm sure tate did me for it to spread

i'm sure tate did me for it to spread

i'm sure tate did me for it to spread well as long as he didn't mean it

well as long as he didn't mean it

well as long as he didn't mean it well i'm sorry

well i'm sorry

well i'm sorry [Music]

[Music]

[Music] so your jerk boyfriend

so your jerk boyfriend

so your jerk boyfriend have you heard from him or what

have you heard from him or what

have you heard from him or what no

no

no nothing crap you know he's not

nothing crap you know he's not

nothing crap you know he's not always an

always an

always an unlike me

lily oh sorry are you awful no no not at

lily oh sorry are you awful no no not at

lily oh sorry are you awful no no not at all happy to have you and your eye team

all happy to have you and your eye team

all happy to have you and your eye team really yeah thanks jenna

really yeah thanks jenna

really yeah thanks jenna [Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh

oh

oh hi candace

hi candace

hi candace [Music]

[Music]

[Music] pleasure as always

pleasure as always

pleasure as always [Music]

[Music]

[Music] nothing no one i am just learning how to

nothing no one i am just learning how to

nothing no one i am just learning how to use my camera okay kids

use my camera okay kids

use my camera okay kids welcome officially to yearbook club now

welcome officially to yearbook club now

welcome officially to yearbook club now that you've all got your cameras i want

that you've all got your cameras i want

that you've all got your cameras i want you to ask yourselves one thing

you to ask yourselves one thing

you to ask yourselves one thing is life art or is art life more like

is life art or is art life more like

is life art or is art life more like fart life

fart life

fart life lily what no i i didn't say okay

lily what no i i didn't say okay

lily what no i i didn't say okay jokesters enough of that i'll put you in

jokesters enough of that i'll put you in

jokesters enough of that i'll put you in pairs of two for portrait practice

pairs of two for portrait practice

pairs of two for portrait practice remember two things a

remember two things a

remember two things a take risks

take risks

take risks find your artistic voices that goes for

find your artistic voices that goes for

find your artistic voices that goes for yearbook club and for life and b

yearbook club and for life and b

yearbook club and for life and b this is fun

this is fun

this is fun as lilly helped point out it wasn't me

as lilly helped point out it wasn't me

as lilly helped point out it wasn't me okay youtube youtube

okay youtube youtube

okay youtube youtube and youtube

and youtube

and youtube thanks for that

thanks for that

thanks for that anytime you can uh go first i don't like

anytime you can uh go first i don't like

anytime you can uh go first i don't like my picture taken

what are you doing

what are you doing

what are you doing hello

hello

hello for who

for who

for who that's not the real you

that's not the real you

that's not the real you so what do you think is around me

so what do you think is around me

so what do you think is around me someone much bitchier for starters

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] who are you talking to

who are you talking to

who are you talking to your girlfriend

your girlfriend

your girlfriend she's not my

she's not my

she's not my what are you even doing up here are you

what are you even doing up here are you

what are you even doing up here are you supposed to be taking pics for the

supposed to be taking pics for the

supposed to be taking pics for the wedding team

wedding team

wedding team shouldn't you be

shouldn't you be

shouldn't you be [Music]

[Music]

[Music] i

i

i had to get away from my mom

had to get away from my mom

had to get away from my mom good old christ

yeah she's been pretty intense lately

yeah she's been pretty intense lately

yeah she's been pretty intense lately what's her deal

what's her deal

what's her deal i don't know

i don't know

i don't know she wants to ruin my life

crap i forgot to give jonas black his

crap i forgot to give jonas black his

crap i forgot to give jonas black his camera um

camera um

camera um i'll be right back

i'll be right back

i'll be right back oh um okay

oh um okay

oh um okay [Music]

close-ups you got whites i think we're

close-ups you got whites i think we're

close-ups you got whites i think we're good

good

good got a cool stupid tape but

got a cool stupid tape but

got a cool stupid tape but i don't wanna use it

i don't wanna use it

i don't wanna use it trouble in paradise just annoyed

trouble in paradise just annoyed

trouble in paradise just annoyed and we were supposed to hang out but he

and we were supposed to hang out but he

and we were supposed to hang out but he just counseled on me for the lamest

just counseled on me for the lamest

just counseled on me for the lamest reason sucks yeah he told valerie he'd

reason sucks yeah he told valerie he'd

reason sucks yeah he told valerie he'd help her move her crap for her

help her move her crap for her

help her move her crap for her internship

internship

internship [Music]

[Music]

[Music] lame right

lame right

lame right [Music]

duh they weren't hair fibers they are

duh they weren't hair fibers they are

duh they weren't hair fibers they are fur fibers

fur fibers

fur fibers [Music]

prep

prep

prep she's gone i'll meet you at hq

she's gone i'll meet you at hq

she's gone i'll meet you at hq what are you talking about um do me a

what are you talking about um do me a

what are you talking about um do me a favor get tate to cancel why just do it

favor get tate to cancel why just do it

favor get tate to cancel why just do it i'll explain later

i'll explain later

i'll explain later fine

fine

fine geez you're a lot bossier than i

geez you're a lot bossier than i

geez you're a lot bossier than i remember

remember

remember [Music]

cute shorts we should take your portrait

cute shorts we should take your portrait

cute shorts we should take your portrait today oh yeah sure we can do that thanks

today oh yeah sure we can do that thanks

today oh yeah sure we can do that thanks that was weird

that was weird

that was weird but she's right

nice dismount

nice dismount

nice dismount so graceful

so graceful

so graceful of course you're here

of course you're here

of course you're here like i have a choice

like i have a choice

like i have a choice you've met my mom

you've met my mom

you've met my mom yeah she's um a raging she-devil well i

yeah she's um a raging she-devil well i

yeah she's um a raging she-devil well i wasn't gonna say that

wasn't gonna say that

wasn't gonna say that to your face

to your face

to your face you come here to rescue your other half

you come here to rescue your other half

you come here to rescue your other half uh yes

uh yes

uh yes well you're just in time

well you're just in time

well you're just in time i haven't started yet

i haven't started yet

i haven't started yet [Music]

[Music]

[Music] you're a good friend

what the hell lily's really arresting me

what the hell lily's really arresting me

what the hell lily's really arresting me not making small talk with the enemy uh

not making small talk with the enemy uh

not making small talk with the enemy uh i was just about to come find you okay

i was just about to come find you okay

i was just about to come find you okay where's the car

where's the car

where's the car we need to be elsewhere asap

we need to be elsewhere asap

we need to be elsewhere asap i brought my bike

i brought my bike

i brought my bike why

why

why [Music]

[Music]

[Music] stupid brutus and his stupid training

stupid brutus and his stupid training

stupid brutus and his stupid training sabotage the car i don't know teaches

sabotage the car i don't know teaches

sabotage the car i don't know teaches resilience or something maybe you should

resilience or something maybe you should

resilience or something maybe you should get a tandem bike i mean it's not like

get a tandem bike i mean it's not like

get a tandem bike i mean it's not like you guys can get any less lame okay

you guys can get any less lame okay

you guys can get any less lame okay nobody asked you princess mcbitchface

nobody asked you princess mcbitchface

nobody asked you princess mcbitchface whatever

whatever

whatever later losers

later losers

later losers dorcapalooza sign up ass

dorcapalooza sign up ass

dorcapalooza sign up ass sorry tate's girlfriend

sorry tate's girlfriend

sorry tate's girlfriend i have a name

i have a name

i have a name god it's like i wouldn't exist if i

god it's like i wouldn't exist if i

god it's like i wouldn't exist if i wasn't his girlfriend

wasn't his girlfriend

wasn't his girlfriend you didn't have to say anything i'm

you didn't have to say anything i'm

you didn't have to say anything i'm signing up for sat deck it is kind of

signing up for sat deck it is kind of

signing up for sat deck it is kind of dorka palooza honestly just sign up for

dorka palooza honestly just sign up for

dorka palooza honestly just sign up for whatever you want

whatever you want

whatever you want screw everyone else

see ya

hey um

hey um

hey um how do you think

how do you think

how do you think uh no but i didn't think theater was

uh no but i didn't think theater was

uh no but i didn't think theater was state's thing

state's thing

state's thing it's not

it's not

it's not he just said he'd be here though

hopefully you didn't plan the same

hopefully you didn't plan the same

hopefully you didn't plan the same monologue as this guy

yeah this is it for my family

yeah

yeah

yeah [Music]

[Music]

[Music] stop

stop

stop i'm not saying that soccer's less

i'm not saying that soccer's less

i'm not saying that soccer's less important i just

well it is to me

well it is to me

well it is to me [Music]

[Music]

[Music] sorry i was just

sorry i was just

sorry i was just it's fine

it's fine

it's fine um

um

um tate never shut up

tate never shut up

tate never shut up sorry

sorry

sorry he doesn't he doesn't really get that

he doesn't he doesn't really get that

he doesn't he doesn't really get that this is important to me and even though

this is important to me and even though

this is important to me and even though i told him like

i told him like

i told him like like a million times

like a million times

like a million times [Music]

[Music]

[Music] whatever um no he's your boyfriend he

whatever um no he's your boyfriend he

whatever um no he's your boyfriend he should support you

should support you

should support you i don't think he got the memo

i don't think he got the memo

i don't think he got the memo i just get so sick of his you know

i just get so sick of his you know

i just get so sick of his you know but

but

but but it's date

but it's date

but it's date now i can't not be with him

now i can't not be with him

now i can't not be with him you know we're meant to be together

you know we're meant to be together

you know we're meant to be together everyone says

everyone says

everyone says you know we're supposed to be this

you know we're supposed to be this

you know we're supposed to be this perfect couple

but screw everyone else remember

but screw everyone else remember

but screw everyone else remember you don't need tate you're gonna nail it

you don't need tate you're gonna nail it

you don't need tate you're gonna nail it thanks

thanks

thanks [Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh it's a prop

oh it's a prop

oh it's a prop [Music]

[Music]

[Music] do me a favor

do me a favor

do me a favor don't get sneezed on okay

don't get sneezed on okay

don't get sneezed on okay sure

[Music]

so before you come back here with

so before you come back here with

so before you come back here with another lame ass offer

another lame ass offer

another lame ass offer i want you to think real hard about what

i want you to think real hard about what

i want you to think real hard about what your spine is with mr walker or or what

your spine is with mr walker or or what

your spine is with mr walker or or what you might expect someone to pay you for

you might expect someone to pay you for

you might expect someone to pay you for your uterus ms sanchez and then you take

your uterus ms sanchez and then you take

your uterus ms sanchez and then you take out your calculator then you multiply

out your calculator then you multiply

out your calculator then you multiply that number by a hundred and anything

that number by a hundred and anything

that number by a hundred and anything less than that is a waste of our time

less than that is a waste of our time

less than that is a waste of our time [Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

[Music]

[Music] who the hell cares

hey hot stuff can i get a piece of that

hey hot stuff can i get a piece of that

hey hot stuff can i get a piece of that oh

oh

oh how about hey candace congratulations on

how about hey candace congratulations on

how about hey candace congratulations on getting the lead in the school play you

getting the lead in the school play you

getting the lead in the school play you wish you got the lead

wish you got the lead

wish you got the lead how was i supposed to know maybe if you

how was i supposed to know maybe if you

how was i supposed to know maybe if you cared about something other than soccer

cared about something other than soccer

cared about something other than soccer like i don't know

like i don't know

like i don't know me tate hudson please report to the

me tate hudson please report to the

me tate hudson please report to the soccer field

soccer field

soccer field gotta go

gotta go

gotta go i see the scrimmage

hey

hey

hey uh

uh

uh heard you snagged juliette congrats

heard you snagged juliette congrats

heard you snagged juliette congrats thanks it's a little intimidating to be

thanks it's a little intimidating to be

thanks it's a little intimidating to be honest

honest

honest a lot of lines ah you'll be awesome just

a lot of lines ah you'll be awesome just

a lot of lines ah you'll be awesome just think of all the bible verses you've

think of all the bible verses you've

think of all the bible verses you've memorized

thanks

thanks

thanks um

maybe you can help me run lines

maybe you can help me run lines

maybe you can help me run lines like today after school

like today after school

like today after school wouldn't you rather practice with tate

wouldn't you rather practice with tate

wouldn't you rather practice with tate i don't think you'd get it

i don't think you'd get it

i don't think you'd get it or care

or care

or care sure

sure

sure yeah

yeah

yeah do you want to meet at my place

do you want to meet at my place

do you want to meet at my place yeah all

yeah all

yeah all right sounds good

right sounds good

right sounds good see ya

my lips two blushing blokes readily

my lips two blushing blokes readily

my lips two blushing blokes readily stand to smooth that rough touch with a

stand to smooth that rough touch with a

stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss good mate you do wrong

tender kiss good mate you do wrong

tender kiss good mate you do wrong you're handy

you're handy

you're handy i know i know i need to work on my

i know i know i need to work on my

i know i know i need to work on my accent no no no it's um

accent no no no it's um

accent no no no it's um yeah that's pretty bad

yeah that's pretty bad

yeah that's pretty bad [Music]

[Music]

[Music] speaking of accents do you remember when

speaking of accents do you remember when

speaking of accents do you remember when we were little and we used to act out

we were little and we used to act out

we were little and we used to act out those terrible sketches that you'd force

those terrible sketches that you'd force

those terrible sketches that you'd force your little sister to be your audience

your little sister to be your audience

your little sister to be your audience yeah i'm pretty sure that's why she

yeah i'm pretty sure that's why she

yeah i'm pretty sure that's why she hates me now

i have to get this she'll just

i have to get this she'll just

i have to get this she'll just keep on calling yeah no problem

keep on calling yeah no problem

keep on calling yeah no problem [Music]

[Music]

[Music] hey mom sweetie are you okay

hey mom sweetie are you okay

hey mom sweetie are you okay i heard you had a fight with tate

i heard you had a fight with tate

i heard you had a fight with tate i'm fine that he's just being dumb

i'm fine that he's just being dumb

i'm fine that he's just being dumb where are you i'll come pick you up for

where are you i'll come pick you up for

where are you i'll come pick you up for youth group

youth group

youth group i'm uh

i'm uh

i'm uh i

i'm i'm at the mall

i'm i'm at the mall

i'm i'm at the mall yeah just blowing off some steam

yeah just blowing off some steam

yeah just blowing off some steam okay

okay

okay don't blow too hard

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] why don't we just lose the accent for

why don't we just lose the accent for

why don't we just lose the accent for now and just work on the lines

now and just work on the lines

now and just work on the lines [Music]

[Music]

[Music] sure

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] good bloke

good bloke

good bloke you do wrong your hand too much

you do wrong your hand too much

you do wrong your hand too much such manly devotion shows in this

such manly devotion shows in this

such manly devotion shows in this for saints have hands that mate's hands

for saints have hands that mate's hands

for saints have hands that mate's hands do touch

do touch

do touch [Music]

[Music]

[Music] and palm to palm

and palm to palm

and palm to palm is holy palmer's kiss

is holy palmer's kiss

is holy palmer's kiss [Music]

happy birthday

what's inside

what's inside

what's inside lily

lily

lily what sorry uh nothing

what sorry uh nothing

what sorry uh nothing lily

lily

lily are you okay

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh god

[Music]

happy birthday

happy birthday

happy birthday you're not going to play party anymore

you're not going to play party anymore

you're not going to play party anymore actually i don't want to be friends at

actually i don't want to be friends at

actually i don't want to be friends at all anymore you just don't

all anymore you just don't

all anymore you just don't fit

hey

hey

hey where'd you go there

where'd you go there

where'd you go there uh

uh

uh i

i

i must have fallen asleep with my eyes

must have fallen asleep with my eyes

must have fallen asleep with my eyes open

open

open it's a glowing review

it's a glowing review

it's a glowing review i know my accent needs work but you

i know my accent needs work but you

i know my accent needs work but you don't want to be mean about it geez

don't want to be mean about it geez

don't want to be mean about it geez that's not what i meant hey

that's not what i meant hey

that's not what i meant hey you two have been at it a long time you

you two have been at it a long time you

you two have been at it a long time you must be hungry there you go babe

i guess your parents don't like me very

i guess your parents don't like me very

i guess your parents don't like me very much

much

much i mean

i mean

i mean can you blame them

candace

candace

candace you literally woke up one day and

you literally woke up one day and

you literally woke up one day and decided we're no longer friends

decided we're no longer friends

decided we're no longer friends and at your own goddamn birthday party

and at your own goddamn birthday party

and at your own goddamn birthday party no less what are you talking about

that's that's not what happened that's

that's that's not what happened that's

that's that's not what happened that's exactly what happened

exactly what happened

exactly what happened i remember it like it was five seconds

i remember it like it was five seconds

i remember it like it was five seconds ago

ago

ago i didn't decide anything it was my mom

i didn't decide anything it was my mom

i didn't decide anything it was my mom what was your problem

what was your problem

what was your problem was it

was it

was it how i look

how i look

how i look was it because my moms are gay

was it because my moms are gay

was it because my moms are gay lily

i think you're so

i think you're so

i think you're so so pretty

so pretty

so pretty okay and and i would

okay and and i would

okay and and i would and i would never want you to think that

and i would never want you to think that

and i would never want you to think that i have a problem with anyone being queer

i have a problem with anyone being queer

i have a problem with anyone being queer you know

you know

you know actually i save it candace

[Music]

maybe we can't be friends

maybe we can't be friends

maybe we can't be friends maybe we can't

go play with your little friends

oh my god

oh my god

oh my god candace was right

candace was right

candace was right it's not what happened

happy birthday

happy birthday

happy birthday you can't come to my party

i'm not allowed to be friends with you

i'm not allowed to be friends with you

i'm not allowed to be friends with you anymore

anymore

anymore we would just prefer if candace played

we would just prefer if candace played

we would just prefer if candace played with friends who share our values

with friends who share our values

with friends who share our values you and your

you and your

you and your family don't really fit in

family don't really fit in

family don't really fit in [Music]

hey

hey

hey you were right

you were right

you were right what happened back then wasn't okay but

what happened back then wasn't okay but

what happened back then wasn't okay but it also wasn't your fault

it also wasn't your fault

it also wasn't your fault we can still hang out if you want

we can still hang out if you want

we can still hang out if you want play practice tomorrow

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] kill me

kill me

kill me you've never stopped at my locker before

you've never stopped at my locker before

you've never stopped at my locker before is everything okay tate's a my

is everything okay tate's a my

is everything okay tate's a my mom's a and they should all just

mom's a and they should all just

mom's a and they should all just date each other and have a vest i

date each other and have a vest i

date each other and have a vest i think there's a category for that my mom

think there's a category for that my mom

think there's a category for that my mom says i can't do the play unless i get an

says i can't do the play unless i get an

says i can't do the play unless i get an a-plus on my bio midterm

a-plus on my bio midterm

a-plus on my bio midterm she doesn't want me to do anything

she doesn't want me to do anything

she doesn't want me to do anything except for her stupid youth group

except for her stupid youth group

except for her stupid youth group and tate's great advice is to just quit

and tate's great advice is to just quit

and tate's great advice is to just quit those are horrible options

those are horrible options

those are horrible options yeah he's not so supportive

yeah he's not so supportive

yeah he's not so supportive um

i don't even know why i still expect it

i don't even know why i still expect it

i don't even know why i still expect it anymore

anymore

anymore now why is everyone so up in my

now why is everyone so up in my

now why is everyone so up in my i cannot be with bio

i cannot be with bio

i cannot be with bio really

really

really i mean i can't guarantee an a plus

i mean i can't guarantee an a plus

i mean i can't guarantee an a plus but

but

but you can't quit the play

you can't quit the play

you can't quit the play we'll figure something out

we'll figure something out

we'll figure something out thanks

thanks

thanks [Music]

[Music]

[Music] um

um

um i should go fix my face

i should go fix my face

i should go fix my face i'll talk to you later sure

i'll talk to you later sure

i'll talk to you later sure [Music]

[Music]

[Music] hello fighting ferrets just a friendly

hello fighting ferrets just a friendly

hello fighting ferrets just a friendly reminder that you're all mega dorks and

reminder that you're all mega dorks and

reminder that you're all mega dorks and you suck

you suck

you suck tate

tate

tate he's such an ass

he's such an ass

he's such an ass like it's so cringe having to apologize

like it's so cringe having to apologize

like it's so cringe having to apologize for him all the time

for him all the time

for him all the time my good friend says we're meant to be

my good friend says we're meant to be

my good friend says we're meant to be together but

together but

together but it's seriously getting old trying to

it's seriously getting old trying to

it's seriously getting old trying to keep him happy when

keep him happy when

keep him happy when when he doesn't care at all if i'm happy

when he doesn't care at all if i'm happy

when he doesn't care at all if i'm happy like

like

like would it kill him for wants to be

would it kill him for wants to be

would it kill him for wants to be supportive

supportive

supportive [Music]

[Music]

[Music] why am i telling you this uh

why am i telling you this uh

why am i telling you this uh [Music]

[Music]

[Music] tate hudson we need to talk sup in

tate hudson we need to talk sup in

tate hudson we need to talk sup in i don't want to make excuses for you

i don't want to make excuses for you

i don't want to make excuses for you anymore

anymore

anymore i don't want to sit at your soccer games

i don't want to sit at your soccer games

i don't want to sit at your soccer games i don't want to watch you play zombie

i don't want to watch you play zombie

i don't want to watch you play zombie hunters or whatever it's called

hunters or whatever it's called

hunters or whatever it's called i don't even like video games wait what

i don't even like video games wait what

i don't even like video games wait what you never care about what i'm interested

you never care about what i'm interested

you never care about what i'm interested in okay i don't even know why we're

in okay i don't even know why we're

in okay i don't even know why we're still doing this date

still doing this date

still doing this date we're not a good fit

we're not a good fit

we're not a good fit i mean who are we doing this for because

i mean who are we doing this for because

i mean who are we doing this for because it's obviously not for ourselves

are you breaking up with me

are you breaking up with me

are you breaking up with me i'm sorry

oh hey

oh hey

oh hey you are at my locker again

you are at my locker again

you are at my locker again hey um

hey um

hey um thanks for getting eggs to study with me

thanks for getting eggs to study with me

thanks for getting eggs to study with me uh was it helpful

uh was it helpful

uh was it helpful yeah um

yeah um

yeah um i broke up with tape

i broke up with tape

i broke up with tape i know

i know

i know kind of crazy but um i

kind of crazy but um i

kind of crazy but um i i think it was the right thing to do

i think it was the right thing to do

i think it was the right thing to do you know we weren't really meant for

you know we weren't really meant for

you know we weren't really meant for each other

each other

each other i wouldn't realize that without eggs and

i wouldn't realize that without eggs and

i wouldn't realize that without eggs and that's thanks to you

oh i'm here

oh i'm here

oh i'm here welcome

welcome

welcome yeah and um now i actually have a shot

yeah and um now i actually have a shot

yeah and um now i actually have a shot of facing my midterm so uh

of facing my midterm so uh

of facing my midterm so uh screw you mom

screw you mom

screw you mom hey

hey

hey i'm really happy that we're friends

i'm really happy that we're friends

i'm really happy that we're friends again

again

again me too obviously

me too obviously

me too obviously you're blocking the box

[Music]

is there a category for most likely to

is there a category for most likely to

is there a category for most likely to be voted off the island because

be voted off the island because

be voted off the island because you'd be unlocked

you'd be unlocked

you'd be unlocked [Music]

[Music]

[Music] do you have to keep doing that

do you have to keep doing that

do you have to keep doing that but that whole yearbook thing is so dumb

but that whole yearbook thing is so dumb

but that whole yearbook thing is so dumb by the way

by the way

by the way says the girl who get voted best legs

says the girl who get voted best legs

says the girl who get voted best legs i'm

i'm

i'm assuming

assuming

assuming um

um

um i mean it's not like i think you have

i mean it's not like i think you have

i mean it's not like i think you have good legs i mean you know you have good

good legs i mean you know you have good

good legs i mean you know you have good legs but it's not like i stare at your

legs but it's not like i stare at your

legs but it's not like i stare at your legs or anything i i'm i and i'm not

legs or anything i i'm i and i'm not

legs or anything i i'm i and i'm not saying i voted i don't vote

saying i voted i don't vote

saying i voted i don't vote so

so

so are you okay

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] do you think we could run lines again

do you think we could run lines again

do you think we could run lines again sometime i could share the use of

sometime i could share the use of

sometime i could share the use of practice yeah let me know when yeah does

practice yeah let me know when yeah does

practice yeah let me know when yeah does this look like the loser table

[Music]

oh yeah i forgot why i did call me back

oh yeah i forgot why i did call me back

oh yeah i forgot why i did call me back let me stand here until they'll remember

let me stand here until they'll remember

let me stand here until they'll remember it stop

it stop

it stop [Music]

[Music]

[Music] why are you playing it like that romeo

why are you playing it like that romeo

why are you playing it like that romeo and juliet are supposed to be drunk in

and juliet are supposed to be drunk in

and juliet are supposed to be drunk in this scene no they're not

this scene no they're not

this scene no they're not they've been partying all night juliet

they've been partying all night juliet

they've been partying all night juliet can't remember what she was talking

can't remember what she was talking

can't remember what she was talking about they're obviously wasted i don't

about they're obviously wasted i don't

about they're obviously wasted i don't have time for this

have time for this

have time for this i'm gonna go set up the kissing booth

while we're on the subject

while we're on the subject

while we're on the subject of creepy egg monsters boyfriends

of creepy egg monsters boyfriends

of creepy egg monsters boyfriends i should get you one

i should get you one

i should get you one i know we're not rolling in quality

i know we're not rolling in quality

i know we're not rolling in quality specimens but i'm sure there's a dude

specimens but i'm sure there's a dude

specimens but i'm sure there's a dude out there who's at least semi-worthy

there isn't

there isn't

there isn't [Music]

[Music]

[Music] not a dude anyway

[Music]

wait

wait

wait a

a

a minute

minute

minute lily fortenberry

lily fortenberry

lily fortenberry have you been holding out on me

have you been holding out on me

have you been holding out on me are you crushing on a special lady

are you crushing on a special lady

are you crushing on a special lady friend oh my god do i know her no no

friend oh my god do i know her no no

friend oh my god do i know her no no she's from book club

she's from book club

she's from book club well look at you an older woman no no no

well look at you an older woman no no no

well look at you an older woman no no no her

her

her her mom is in my mom's book club but it

her mom is in my mom's book club but it

her mom is in my mom's book club but it doesn't matter it's all very

doesn't matter it's all very

doesn't matter it's all very hypothetical well if you wanted to be

hypothetical well if you wanted to be

hypothetical well if you wanted to be vertical

vertical

vertical i got you

i got you

i got you thanks

thanks

thanks oh my god

i'm going to be the best winged person

i'm going to be the best winged person

i'm going to be the best winged person ever

ever

ever okay come on

okay come on

okay come on let's get back to sergeant

let's get back to sergeant

let's get back to sergeant oh yeah

uh

uh

uh what are you doing in here just taking a

what are you doing in here just taking a

what are you doing in here just taking a break guessing this was insane

break guessing this was insane

break guessing this was insane um

um

um [Music]

[Music]

[Music] stay with me

stay with me

stay with me uh i don't know please

uh i don't know please

uh i don't know please [Music]

[Music]

[Music] okay

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] so good

so good

so good aren't you uh worried your mom might

aren't you uh worried your mom might

aren't you uh worried your mom might find out

find out

find out i'm pretty sure she's too busy playing

i'm pretty sure she's too busy playing

i'm pretty sure she's too busy playing sex please to keep tabs on me

you know the the last time i remember

you know the the last time i remember

you know the the last time i remember actually being happy was when i was a

actually being happy was when i was a

actually being happy was when i was a kid

kid

kid when we were friends

when we were friends

when we were friends you know now everyone just expects me to

you know now everyone just expects me to

you know now everyone just expects me to be this cool confident person

be this cool confident person

be this cool confident person it's

exhausting

exhausting

exhausting and most of the time i just feel like

and most of the time i just feel like

and most of the time i just feel like i'm invisible

i'm invisible

i'm invisible but you're candace

but you're candace

but you're candace you're like the most visible

you're like the most visible

you're like the most visible none of that's real

none of that's real

none of that's real [Music]

[Music]

[Music] you know i only did the kissing booth to

you know i only did the kissing booth to

you know i only did the kissing booth to piss off my mom and she didn't even

piss off my mom and she didn't even

piss off my mom and she didn't even notice

notice

notice well

well

well you're kind of hard to ignore with those

legs you know what i would have voted

legs you know what i would have voted

legs you know what i would have voted you

you

you um

um

um easiest to talk to

screw it

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] ow are you okay yeah yeah i just sat on

ow are you okay yeah yeah i just sat on

ow are you okay yeah yeah i just sat on something

uh i'm really sorry but

uh i'm really sorry but

uh i'm really sorry but i have to go take care of something

i have to go take care of something

i have to go take care of something uh

uh

uh um

um

um maybe i'll see you soon

maybe i'll see you soon

maybe i'll see you soon yeah

yeah

yeah [Music]

let me guess

let me guess

let me guess you want to forget what happened you

you want to forget what happened you

you want to forget what happened you know you weren't yourself it was a big

know you weren't yourself it was a big

know you weren't yourself it was a big mistake

mistake

mistake no i

no i

no i i wanted to say good night

i wanted to say good night

i wanted to say good night [Music]

[Music]

[Music] yo jerk face

yo jerk face

yo jerk face go ruin someone else's night you said

go ruin someone else's night you said

go ruin someone else's night you said you'd stop doing that

you'd stop doing that

you'd stop doing that sorry for the habit

sorry for the habit

sorry for the habit whatever um

whatever um

whatever um i'm gonna go uh i'll text you about

i'm gonna go uh i'll text you about

i'm gonna go uh i'll text you about running lanes tomorrow night

running lanes tomorrow night

running lanes tomorrow night cool

cool

cool [Music]

[Music]

[Music] i can't believe michelle gave us

i can't believe michelle gave us

i can't believe michelle gave us detention i wonder if it's technically

detention i wonder if it's technically

detention i wonder if it's technically illegal to keep us here on a saturday

illegal to keep us here on a saturday

illegal to keep us here on a saturday but it's not like you've not also been a

but it's not like you've not also been a

but it's not like you've not also been a little bit distracted

little bit distracted

little bit distracted [Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh am i boring you

oh am i boring you

oh am i boring you i sleep all i say

i sleep all i say

i sleep all i say and

and

and what do you mean by distracted

what do you mean by distracted

what do you mean by distracted you know

you know

you know all the endless rehearsing lines with

all the endless rehearsing lines with

all the endless rehearsing lines with c-bomb well i had to do something while

c-bomb well i had to do something while

c-bomb well i had to do something while you were eating pretzels with sparrow

you were eating pretzels with sparrow

you were eating pretzels with sparrow and can we stop calling her c-bomb

and can we stop calling her c-bomb

and can we stop calling her c-bomb you want to call her by her name

gross this is worse than i thought

welcome to detention delinquents

welcome to detention delinquents

welcome to detention delinquents we've got six hours of this and if you

we've got six hours of this and if you

we've got six hours of this and if you piss me off you're doing sprints naps

piss me off you're doing sprints naps

piss me off you're doing sprints naps will get you sidelined and don't even

will get you sidelined and don't even

will get you sidelined and don't even think about giving me any beef that's

think about giving me any beef that's

think about giving me any beef that's what she said look alive people because

what she said look alive people because

what she said look alive people because party time is over

party time is over

party time is over today you're gonna be crafting the two

today you're gonna be crafting the two

today you're gonna be crafting the two most important decorations for the dance

most important decorations for the dance

most important decorations for the dance a life-sized angel and demon

a life-sized angel and demon

a life-sized angel and demon they are the entryway statement pieces

they are the entryway statement pieces

they are the entryway statement pieces and they are essential they set the tone

and they are essential they set the tone

and they are essential they set the tone you can thank astrid and lily for

you can thank astrid and lily for

you can thank astrid and lily for vandalizing my beautiful originals bravo

vandalizing my beautiful originals bravo

vandalizing my beautiful originals bravo thank you astrid i know right

thank you astrid i know right

thank you astrid i know right but it's not like the rest of you are

but it's not like the rest of you are

but it's not like the rest of you are model students

model students

model students candace spiked the lemonade at the fair

candace spiked the lemonade at the fair

candace spiked the lemonade at the fair sparrow kidnapped a frog from bio tate

sparrow kidnapped a frog from bio tate

sparrow kidnapped a frog from bio tate pants someone at practice and eggs

pants someone at practice and eggs

pants someone at practice and eggs why are you here

why are you here

why are you here it's the library

it's the library

it's the library whatever

whatever

whatever you guys can start by tearing this

you guys can start by tearing this

you guys can start by tearing this toilet paper into perfect individual

toilet paper into perfect individual

toilet paper into perfect individual squares before making them into feathers

squares before making them into feathers

squares before making them into feathers and gluing them onto wings in a

and gluing them onto wings in a

and gluing them onto wings in a cascading pattern at a 45 degree angle

this is literally my worst nightmare

what did i just say about napping

what did i just say about napping

what did i just say about napping doesn't delinquent numero uno have some

doesn't delinquent numero uno have some

doesn't delinquent numero uno have some tissue paper to feather

tissue paper to feather

tissue paper to feather sorry go enjoy the rest of the craft

sorry go enjoy the rest of the craft

sorry go enjoy the rest of the craft circle okay

[Music]

delinquent numero uno go get me a diet

delinquent numero uno go get me a diet

delinquent numero uno go get me a diet soda from the calf and make sure it's

soda from the calf and make sure it's

soda from the calf and make sure it's not flat take someone with you so you

not flat take someone with you so you

not flat take someone with you so you don't vandalize anything else in the

don't vandalize anything else in the

don't vandalize anything else in the school i think kids said she had to go

school i think kids said she had to go

school i think kids said she had to go to the bathroom when did she say that

sure whatever

sure whatever

sure whatever [Music]

so um

so um

so um the fair last night

the fair last night

the fair last night what about it

what about it

what about it oh

oh

oh um

um

um just kidding

just kidding

just kidding um

um

um that was really fun

that was really fun

that was really fun i mean i thought so

it's still uh kind of surprised you

it's still uh kind of surprised you

it's still uh kind of surprised you didn't take action with you now instead

didn't take action with you now instead

didn't take action with you now instead it's just nice to hang out with someone

it's just nice to hang out with someone

it's just nice to hang out with someone else for a change

else for a change

else for a change someone else

you else

you else

you else that's not i think

so that's how it is huh

so that's how it is huh

so that's how it is huh um

um

um maybe we can sneak into the stacks when

maybe we can sneak into the stacks when

maybe we can sneak into the stacks when we get back

we get back

we get back that feels a little public um

that feels a little public um

that feels a little public um you know maybe we should just keep

you know maybe we should just keep

you know maybe we should just keep things for us for a while

things for us for a while

things for us for a while okay

okay

okay [Music]

[Music]

[Music] it's just

it's just

it's just um you know everyone's always in my

um you know everyone's always in my

um you know everyone's always in my business i thought it might be

business i thought it might be

business i thought it might be nice to have some time to ourselves you

nice to have some time to ourselves you

nice to have some time to ourselves you know

know

know yeah

yeah

yeah yeah that sounds nice

yeah that sounds nice

yeah that sounds nice [Music]

[Music]

[Music] so

[Music]

i know right yeah that was magical uh

i know right yeah that was magical uh

i know right yeah that was magical uh but we should probably uh get back to

but we should probably uh get back to

but we should probably uh get back to the library stat before michelle glue

the library stat before michelle glue

the library stat before michelle glue guns us to our seats

guns us to our seats

guns us to our seats that seems a bit excessive but okay

that seems a bit excessive but okay

that seems a bit excessive but okay [Music]

[Music]

[Music] broke up with me

broke up with me

broke up with me seriously i i thought we talked about

seriously i i thought we talked about

seriously i i thought we talked about this yeah no we did just uh help me out

this yeah no we did just uh help me out

this yeah no we did just uh help me out you know process some stuff

you know process some stuff

you know process some stuff fine

fine

fine i broke up with you because we want

i broke up with you because we want

i broke up with you because we want different things date we have nothing in

different things date we have nothing in

different things date we have nothing in common and you know it

common and you know it

common and you know it do it

or is it because you and lily are

or is it because you and lily are

or is it because you and lily are together

what are you talking about

what are you talking about

what are you talking about nice try

nice try

nice try i saw you guys kissing we will be

i saw you guys kissing we will be

i saw you guys kissing we will be working i saw you

working i saw you

working i saw you if you're gonna break up with me candace

if you're gonna break up with me candace

if you're gonna break up with me candace whatever

whatever

whatever i never thought you were a cheater

i never thought you were a cheater

i never thought you were a cheater and a liar i never cheated on you i

and a liar i never cheated on you i

and a liar i never cheated on you i swear

please don't tell anyone

please don't tell anyone

please don't tell anyone please

everything okay yeah totally fine

everything okay yeah totally fine

everything okay yeah totally fine you sure

you sure

you sure yep

so i was wondering

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] i think now might be a good time to tell

i think now might be a good time to tell

i think now might be a good time to tell me what's going on yeah seriously ditto

just tell them what's going on

just tell them what's going on

just tell them what's going on uh yeah um sorry sparrow um

uh yeah um sorry sparrow um

uh yeah um sorry sparrow um lily and i are kind of monster hunters

lily and i are kind of monster hunters

lily and i are kind of monster hunters what the

what the

what the that's not what i expected you to say

that's not what i expected you to say

that's not what i expected you to say this is insane but i'm weirdly not

this is insane but i'm weirdly not

this is insane but i'm weirdly not completely surprised

okay okay so this is where you've been

okay okay so this is where you've been

okay okay so this is where you've been going this whole time oh my god i'm

going this whole time oh my god i'm

going this whole time oh my god i'm dating buffy holy this is this is

dating buffy holy this is this is

dating buffy holy this is this is rat no but you should have told me about

rat no but you should have told me about

rat no but you should have told me about this before like we were about to die

this before like we were about to die

this before like we were about to die like hey sparrow monsters are real okay

like hey sparrow monsters are real okay

like hey sparrow monsters are real okay i'm not gonna let you die monster thing

i'm not gonna let you die monster thing

i'm not gonna let you die monster thing is old news bro you want to hear the

is old news bro you want to hear the

is old news bro you want to hear the real secret

real secret

real secret candace and lily are fricken dating

i wouldn't really call it dating

okay wait a second candace

okay wait a second candace

okay wait a second candace wait a second tate did you just out them

wait a second tate did you just out them

wait a second tate did you just out them on what planet do you think that that's

on what planet do you think that that's

on what planet do you think that that's okay that's beyond unacceptable you

okay that's beyond unacceptable you

okay that's beyond unacceptable you idiot

idiot

idiot thank you

thank you

thank you you gotta be kidding me candace is your

you gotta be kidding me candace is your

you gotta be kidding me candace is your crush

crush

crush why did you lie to me why was i lying to

why did you lie to me why was i lying to

why did you lie to me why was i lying to you about c-bomb yes i tell you

you about c-bomb yes i tell you

you about c-bomb yes i tell you everything and i would told you to run

everything and i would told you to run

everything and i would told you to run for the ales which you clearly needed to

for the ales which you clearly needed to

for the ales which you clearly needed to hear

hear

hear then

then

then are we even friends anymore are we even

are we even friends anymore are we even

are we even friends anymore are we even friends anymore

friends anymore

friends anymore we were friends

we were friends

we were friends you guys call me c-bomb

you guys call me c-bomb

you guys call me c-bomb astrid did it ever occur to you that the

astrid did it ever occur to you that the

astrid did it ever occur to you that the reason i'm not nice to you is because

reason i'm not nice to you is because

reason i'm not nice to you is because you're a mess of to me

you're a mess of to me

you're a mess of to me well it takes one to no one did it occur

well it takes one to no one did it occur

well it takes one to no one did it occur to you that i was just trying to protect

to you that i was just trying to protect

to you that i was just trying to protect me and my friend

me and my friend

me and my friend hang on

hang on

hang on what did you mean by we're not really

what did you mean by we're not really

what did you mean by we're not really dating

dating

dating do you not want this anymore

do you not want this anymore

do you not want this anymore are are you embarrassed of your

are are you embarrassed of your

are are you embarrassed of your sexuality because i i thought uh not at

sexuality because i i thought uh not at

sexuality because i i thought uh not at all she's fluid duh she's cool with that

all she's fluid duh she's cool with that

all she's fluid duh she's cool with that it's you

so this was just some big freaking joke

so this was just some big freaking joke

so this was just some big freaking joke to you this was what i was worried about

to you this was what i was worried about

to you this was what i was worried about she's the c-bomb for a reason seems like

she's the c-bomb for a reason seems like

she's the c-bomb for a reason seems like she's playing you

she's playing you

she's playing you maybe you don't know her like you think

maybe you don't know her like you think

maybe you don't know her like you think you knew right because the only way that

you knew right because the only way that

you knew right because the only way that someone like her could like someone like

someone like her could like someone like

someone like her could like someone like me was if it was a joke that's not what

me was if it was a joke that's not what

me was if it was a joke that's not what i said

i said

i said i'm not playing you i just

i'm not playing you i just

i'm not playing you i just oh my hand

oh my hand

oh my hand tate's right

tate's right

tate's right astrid's right

astrid's right

astrid's right it is me

you're embarrassed by me

you're embarrassed by me

you're embarrassed by me [Music]

[Music]

[Music] so that's why i didn't want to make him

so that's why i didn't want to make him

so that's why i didn't want to make him this tax hey wait wait just another

this tax hey wait wait just another

this tax hey wait wait just another goddamn second so this jock turtle ain't

goddamn second so this jock turtle ain't

goddamn second so this jock turtle ain't no offense knew that you guys were

no offense knew that you guys were

no offense knew that you guys were hunting monsters before me too sparrow i

hunting monsters before me too sparrow i

hunting monsters before me too sparrow i i

i

i i

i

i i didn't want you to like be involved so

i didn't want you to like be involved so

i didn't want you to like be involved so you've been lying to only me for our

you've been lying to only me for our

you've been lying to only me for our entire relationship

entire relationship

entire relationship hey guys we should probably get out of

hey guys we should probably get out of

hey guys we should probably get out of these hair cocoons before they dissolve

these hair cocoons before they dissolve

these hair cocoons before they dissolve our skin

our skin

our skin and one more thing

and one more thing

and one more thing that thing is coming down

that thing is coming down

that thing is coming down [Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh

oh

oh god for michelle's stupid trap project

god for michelle's stupid trap project

god for michelle's stupid trap project i'm not gonna let us hurry

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] i'll get the rest of you in a second

i'll get the rest of you in a second

i'll get the rest of you in a second [Applause]

come on

[Music]

over here

over here

over here video camera yeah i know

here

hey don't forget to press record

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh

[Music]

holy that was awesome

holy that was awesome

holy that was awesome [Music]

wet hair in the orb ugh

wet hair in the orb ugh

wet hair in the orb ugh [Music]

i'm sorry

i'm sorry

i'm sorry i

i

i i don't know what to say whatever you

i don't know what to say whatever you

i don't know what to say whatever you don't have to say anything

don't have to say anything

don't have to say anything actually that goes for all of you

actually that goes for all of you

actually that goes for all of you we should probably keep this under wraps

we should probably keep this under wraps

we should probably keep this under wraps yeah for sure you got it

yeah for sure you got it

yeah for sure you got it i'm sure you'll be happy about that

i'm sure you'll be happy about that

i'm sure you'll be happy about that thanks for saving us

thanks for saving us

thanks for saving us [Music]

no damn it astrid wait

no damn it astrid wait

no damn it astrid wait [Music]

[Music]

[Music] lily i am

lily i am

lily i am [Music]

[Music]

[Music] can we talk somewhere else

whoa so creepy

okay what do you want

what are you doing

what are you doing

what are you doing i

i

i i thought we'd kiss some makeup

i thought we'd kiss some makeup

i thought we'd kiss some makeup and then make out i always worked on

and then make out i always worked on

and then make out i always worked on tape seriously

tape seriously

tape seriously you think that's why i liked you

you think that's why i liked you

you think that's why i liked you [Music]

[Music]

[Music] liked

liked

liked like like past tense

like like past tense

like like past tense not exactly

not exactly

not exactly i don't know what to do you won't answer

i don't know what to do you won't answer

i don't know what to do you won't answer any of my texts maybe that should have

any of my texts maybe that should have

any of my texts maybe that should have been a hint

been a hint

been a hint when i thought you just weren't ready to

when i thought you just weren't ready to

when i thought you just weren't ready to tell people that you liked girls

tell people that you liked girls

tell people that you liked girls it was fine okay your mom's crazy kids

it was fine okay your mom's crazy kids

it was fine okay your mom's crazy kids are i get it

are i get it

are i get it but just not wanting to tell people you

but just not wanting to tell people you

but just not wanting to tell people you like me

like me

like me hard pass i'm just not become pda but it

hard pass i'm just not become pda but it

hard pass i'm just not become pda but it was okay when you were with tate that

was okay when you were with tate that

was okay when you were with tate that was different i didn't like acting like

was different i didn't like acting like

was different i didn't like acting like that people just expected well i

that people just expected well i

that people just expected well i expected the person that i like to

expected the person that i like to

expected the person that i like to actually act like they like me back but

actually act like they like me back but

actually act like they like me back but i guess that was just too much to ask

i'm not always my biggest fan

i'm not always my biggest fan

i'm not always my biggest fan but even i know i deserve better than

but even i know i deserve better than

but even i know i deserve better than that

that

that lily wait um hello we need julia's in

lily wait um hello we need julia's in

lily wait um hello we need julia's in rehearsal and don't forget the boomerang

rehearsal and don't forget the boomerang

rehearsal and don't forget the boomerang [Music]

duty calls

so my crush broke my heart my best

so my crush broke my heart my best

so my crush broke my heart my best friend hates me and now there's a

friend hates me and now there's a

friend hates me and now there's a monster who looks exactly like me

monster who looks exactly like me

monster who looks exactly like me running around trying to kill me awesome

whoa

whoa

whoa whoa

whoa

whoa your crush broke your heart you'll fill

your crush broke your heart you'll fill

your crush broke your heart you'll fill a broadest in

a broadest in

a broadest in no time we're gonna find this thing

no time we're gonna find this thing

no time we're gonna find this thing right well i do wanna circle back to

right well i do wanna circle back to

right well i do wanna circle back to this whole crush thing

this whole crush thing

this whole crush thing hello

lily

you're right i screwed up okay

you're right i screwed up okay

you're right i screwed up okay you know it's just it's so hard being

you know it's just it's so hard being

you know it's just it's so hard being popular you know everyone just expects

popular you know everyone just expects

popular you know everyone just expects you to act a certain way and

you to act a certain way and

you to act a certain way and plus

plus

plus my mom would never understand

my mom would never understand

my mom would never understand people expect you to act a certain way

people expect you to act a certain way

people expect you to act a certain way obviously we have a lot more we need to

obviously we have a lot more we need to

obviously we have a lot more we need to talk about but who took the shrimp off

talk about but who took the shrimp off

talk about but who took the shrimp off the barbie

the barbie

the barbie i have to deal with that all day

i have to deal with that all day

i have to deal with that all day michelle decided to

michelle decided to

michelle decided to change the ending of the play

change the ending of the play

change the ending of the play on opening night

on opening night

on opening night classic

can we talk later though yes

can we talk later though yes

can we talk later though yes talk later

talk later

talk later great um

great um

great um till anna

till anna

till anna could you come to the play tonight

could you come to the play tonight

could you come to the play tonight yes

thank you

thank you

thank you you're amazing though for real

[Music]

is there something up with lily no why

is there something up with lily no why

is there something up with lily no why because the average human being blinks

because the average human being blinks

because the average human being blinks once every four seconds she's blinking

once every four seconds she's blinking

once every four seconds she's blinking once every 12.

once every 12.

once every 12. hey lily

hey lily

hey lily i was hoping i'd get to see you before

i was hoping i'd get to see you before

i was hoping i'd get to see you before bathroom's clear

bathroom's clear

bathroom's clear [Music]

[Music]

[Music] but for what candace

but for what candace

but for what candace [Music]

[Music]

[Music] before the play

thank you so much for coming by the way

thank you so much for coming by the way

thank you so much for coming by the way it really means a lot to me that you're

it really means a lot to me that you're

it really means a lot to me that you're going to be there especially since my

going to be there especially since my

going to be there especially since my mom wait i never said i was going

mom wait i never said i was going

mom wait i never said i was going why would i do that

why would i do that

why would i do that [Music]

[Music]

[Music] what are you talking about

what are you talking about

what are you talking about just a couple hours ago you said

just a couple hours ago you said

just a couple hours ago you said [Music]

[Music]

[Music] could we just talk some more private i

could we just talk some more private i

could we just talk some more private i just

just

just i feel weird with tate here you and i

i feel weird with tate here you and i

i feel weird with tate here you and i both know this has nothing to do with

both know this has nothing to do with

both know this has nothing to do with tate yeah candace shut up kate

you know but

you know but

you know but but before you said that uh

but before you said that uh

but before you said that uh that you understood

that you understood

that you understood i'm just under a lot of pressure right

i'm just under a lot of pressure right

i'm just under a lot of pressure right now lily yeah you don't

now lily yeah you don't

now lily yeah you don't you don't get what it's like for

you don't get what it's like for

you don't get what it's like for everyone to expect you to act this way

everyone to expect you to act this way

everyone to expect you to act this way or talk that way or dress another way i

or talk that way or dress another way i

or talk that way or dress another way i don't get what it's like

don't get what it's like

don't get what it's like candace that's my whole goddamn life the

candace that's my whole goddamn life the

candace that's my whole goddamn life the only difference is when i do all that

only difference is when i do all that

only difference is when i do all that it still isn't enough

it still isn't enough

it still isn't enough can we just talk somewhere else please

can we just talk somewhere else please

can we just talk somewhere else please my god no one cares except for you

my god no one cares except for you

my god no one cares except for you candace i'm so goddamn invisible that

candace i'm so goddamn invisible that

candace i'm so goddamn invisible that nobody even noticed that there were two

nobody even noticed that there were two

nobody even noticed that there were two of me walking around today

of me walking around today

of me walking around today wait

wait

wait what oh i gotta go um

candace

candace

candace [Music]

[Music]

[Music] break a leg tonight

break both legs

what about the play i'm not going to

what about the play i'm not going to

what about the play i'm not going to that there's a freaking monster running

that there's a freaking monster running

that there's a freaking monster running around trying to kill me remember

around trying to kill me remember

around trying to kill me remember yeah um

yeah um

yeah um i don't think that's the reason

i don't think that's the reason

i don't think that's the reason you know candace and i were together for

you know candace and i were together for

you know candace and i were together for almost two and a half years

almost two and a half years

almost two and a half years yeah and broke up like six and a half

yeah and broke up like six and a half

yeah and broke up like six and a half times

times

times yeah and all that time

yeah and all that time

yeah and all that time i was never there for her

i was never there for her

i was never there for her never went to her church concerts i

never went to her church concerts i

never went to her church concerts i never took her head shots

never took her head shots

never took her head shots didn't help her run lines

didn't help her run lines

didn't help her run lines look where that got me

look where that got me

look where that got me hmm you might have a point

hmm you might have a point

hmm you might have a point candace screwed up

candace screwed up

candace screwed up no question but

no question but

no question but so did i and you forgave me oh never

so did i and you forgave me oh never

so did i and you forgave me oh never technically said that

she's trying to fix it

she's trying to fix it

she's trying to fix it her mom isn't gonna be there for her

her mom isn't gonna be there for her

her mom isn't gonna be there for her she definitely doesn't care if i'm there

she definitely doesn't care if i'm there

she definitely doesn't care if i'm there the only person truly cares about being

the only person truly cares about being

the only person truly cares about being there is you

there is you

there is you the question is whether or not you're

the question is whether or not you're

the question is whether or not you're gonna show up for her

fine

fine

fine buddy smugglers

buddy smugglers

buddy smugglers shouldn't you be on stage

shouldn't you be on stage

shouldn't you be on stage got harpooned to death three acts ago

got harpooned to death three acts ago

got harpooned to death three acts ago nightly she sings on your eucalyptus

nightly she sings on your eucalyptus

nightly she sings on your eucalyptus tree i'd have made a great

tree i'd have made a great

tree i'd have made a great juice

juice

juice pioneers do spin a line

pioneers do spin a line

pioneers do spin a line with all the sandy in my heart believe

with all the sandy in my heart believe

with all the sandy in my heart believe me mate

me mate

me mate it was the kookaburra it was the lack

it was the kookaburra it was the lack

it was the kookaburra it was the lack the herald of the mawn

the herald of the mawn

the herald of the mawn no kookaburra

but to be

but to be

but to be frank and give it thee again

frank and give it thee again

frank and give it thee again and yet i wish but for the thing i have

and yet i wish but for the thing i have

and yet i wish but for the thing i have my bounty as boundless as the sea

my bounty as boundless as the sea

my bounty as boundless as the sea my love as deep

my love as deep

my love as deep the more i give to thee the more i have

the more i give to thee the more i have

the more i give to thee the more i have for both

for both

for both are infinite

it's the wrong version shut up

[Music]

what if i still have to be a secret

go over here

go over here

go over here [Music]

screw this

screw this

screw this [Music]

[Music]

[Music] lily

lily

lily [Music]

i meant every word i said on stage

i meant every word i said on stage

i meant every word i said on stage you're smart

you're smart

you're smart you're funny

and kind

and kind

and kind and

and

and wildly a monster hunter

wildly a monster hunter

wildly a monster hunter and

and

and gorgeous

gorgeous

gorgeous and honestly better than me in every way

and honestly better than me in every way

and honestly better than me in every way got that right

i know i screwed up

i know i screwed up

i know i screwed up so bad

so bad

so bad and i'm so sorry i let all that stupid

and i'm so sorry i let all that stupid

and i'm so sorry i let all that stupid get to me and i shouldn't have

but if there's any way

but if there's any way

but if there's any way you can give me another chance i promise

you can give me another chance i promise

you can give me another chance i promise to show up for you

to show up for you

to show up for you always

because i'm i'm crazy about you and i

because i'm i'm crazy about you and i

because i'm i'm crazy about you and i want everyone to know it

i know who the last doppel is

i know who the last doppel is

i know who the last doppel is oh

oh

oh who

it's her

it's her

it's her the real candace would never say those

the real candace would never say those

the real candace would never say those things especially not with anyone else

things especially not with anyone else

things especially not with anyone else around to here

around to here

around to here huh

huh

huh you got this

i'm sorry i can't uh it's okay i'll chop

i'm sorry i can't uh it's okay i'll chop

i'm sorry i can't uh it's okay i'll chop off candace's head

off candace's head

off candace's head for you oh what the hell are you two

for you oh what the hell are you two

for you oh what the hell are you two talking about oh yeah she's definitely

talking about oh yeah she's definitely

talking about oh yeah she's definitely the monster

the monster

the monster wow that was my role and my kiss with

wow that was my role and my kiss with

wow that was my role and my kiss with the hottest guy in school

the hottest guy in school

the hottest guy in school double vowels

double vowels

double vowels we're gonna go deal with that

we're gonna go deal with that

we're gonna go deal with that come on let's go hey come on

come on let's go hey come on

come on let's go hey come on it's really you

everything you said

everything you said

everything you said that was real

that was real

that was real yeah

was aston really gonna chop off my head

was aston really gonna chop off my head

was aston really gonna chop off my head i promise

i promise

i promise i will explain everything that the

i will explain everything that the

i will explain everything that the double vowels the head chopping all of

double vowels the head chopping all of

double vowels the head chopping all of it but

it but

it but first

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] first let's go

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] um

um

um sorry mr curtain call

sorry mr curtain call

sorry mr curtain call worth it

i do have one question for you though

i do have one question for you though

i do have one question for you though lily fort and mary

lily fort and mary

lily fort and mary [Music]

[Music]

[Music] will you be my day to a dance

yes

yes

yes [Music]

um

um

um mom

mom

mom moti

moti

moti piper

piper

piper candice and i

candice and i

candice and i are dating right yeah

are dating right yeah

are dating right yeah well um

we are very happy for you

we are very happy for you

we are very happy for you and candace congratulations on a great

and candace congratulations on a great

and candace congratulations on a great job in the play oh your mom must be so

job in the play oh your mom must be so

job in the play oh your mom must be so proud um

proud um

proud um actually she she can show you know she's

actually she she can show you know she's

actually she she can show you know she's just too busy with her church thing so

just too busy with her church thing so

just too busy with her church thing so it's okay

it's okay

it's okay well we're proud of you yeah

well we're proud of you yeah

well we're proud of you yeah do you need a ride home

do you need a ride home

do you need a ride home uh yeah that'd be great thanks oh um can

uh yeah that'd be great thanks oh um can

uh yeah that'd be great thanks oh um can you guys give me a sec i'm just gonna go

you guys give me a sec i'm just gonna go

you guys give me a sec i'm just gonna go talk to astrid yeah for sure

talk to astrid yeah for sure

talk to astrid yeah for sure let us know when you're ready to go yeah

let us know when you're ready to go yeah

let us know when you're ready to go yeah sure

sure

sure hey lily uh you ready to go

[Music]

[Music]

[Music] okay look

okay look

okay look i still don't like you

i still don't like you

i still don't like you all those years of you treating us like

all those years of you treating us like

all those years of you treating us like doesn't just go away after one i'm

doesn't just go away after one i'm

doesn't just go away after one i'm sorry

fair

fair

fair but if you make lily happy

that's a start

that's a start

that's a start and if you hurt her

and if you hurt her

and if you hurt her i will chop your head off

i will chop your head off

i will chop your head off oh so fair

oh so fair

oh so fair so i'm gonna try

so i'm gonna try

so i'm gonna try we must have something in common oh like

we must have something in common oh like

we must have something in common oh like hey

hey

hey well the redheads are dead

well the redheads are dead

well the redheads are dead oh no um

oh no um

oh no um my mom just tells people that so she

my mom just tells people that so she

my mom just tells people that so she doesn't have to say she's divorced my

doesn't have to say she's divorced my

doesn't have to say she's divorced my dad lives in scranton

dad lives in scranton

dad lives in scranton good to know you know you guys might not

good to know you know you guys might not

good to know you know you guys might not have that one particular thing in common

have that one particular thing in common

have that one particular thing in common but

but

but hey me and candace are going to the

hey me and candace are going to the

hey me and candace are going to the dance together

dance together

dance together maybe we can double date with you and

maybe we can double date with you and

maybe we can double date with you and sparrow

cool jackets ladies yeah we know

candice

candice

candice what are you doing here

what are you doing here

what are you doing here me

me

me why are you here i am chaperoning and i

why are you here i am chaperoning and i

why are you here i am chaperoning and i made it very clear to you that you

made it very clear to you that you

made it very clear to you that you cannot be here tonight because lily's my

cannot be here tonight because lily's my

cannot be here tonight because lily's my date

or is it because you're working for some

or is it because you're working for some

or is it because you're working for some evil monster dude

evil monster dude

evil monster dude you don't know what you are talking

you don't know what you are talking

you don't know what you are talking about

about

about maybe try worrying more about being a

maybe try worrying more about being a

maybe try worrying more about being a good mom

good mom

good mom and less about whatever garbage this guy

and less about whatever garbage this guy

and less about whatever garbage this guy is promising you

is promising you

is promising you please just call him off

please just call him off

please just call him off candace

candace

candace please go home

now wow

now wow

now wow you clean up nice

you clean up nice

you clean up nice you look

you look

you look gorgeous well oh thanks you too

gorgeous well oh thanks you too

gorgeous well oh thanks you too i can't believe you're my date

i can't believe you're my date

i can't believe you're my date i tried to talk sense into my mom

i tried to talk sense into my mom

i tried to talk sense into my mom i wish you just

i wish you just

i wish you just listen to me for once

listen to me for once

listen to me for once don't beat yourself up

don't beat yourself up

don't beat yourself up she can't stop him anyway

she can't stop him anyway

she can't stop him anyway well i got you and asked for some flower

well i got you and asked for some flower

well i got you and asked for some flower flare

flare

flare [Music]

[Music]

[Music] oh

for me

for me

for me yeah

yeah

yeah seriously

oh it's actually really nice

oh it's actually really nice

oh it's actually really nice ugh you're gonna make me like you aren't

ugh you're gonna make me like you aren't

ugh you're gonna make me like you aren't you

hello everyone

hello everyone

hello everyone i hope you are enjoying angels and

i hope you are enjoying angels and

i hope you are enjoying angels and demons

demons

demons you're welcome

you're welcome

you're welcome before we continue it is time to

before we continue it is time to

before we continue it is time to announce your royals

announce your royals

announce your royals your king goes to

avi tate hudson

[Applause]

and your queen goes to

lily fortenberry

there is so much wrong with this

there is so much wrong with this

there is so much wrong with this like for starters uh what are you even

like for starters uh what are you even

like for starters uh what are you even doing here because i banned you from the

doing here because i banned you from the

doing here because i banned you from the dance i will wear this crown before i

dance i will wear this crown before i

dance i will wear this crown before i put it on your head give her the crown

put it on your head give her the crown

put it on your head give her the crown michelle

michelle

michelle look just because you were popular in

look just because you were popular in

look just because you were popular in high school doesn't give you the right

high school doesn't give you the right

high school doesn't give you the right to be a jerk to kids now

to be a jerk to kids now

to be a jerk to kids now so do us a favor and just shut

so do us a favor and just shut

so do us a favor and just shut up

and for the record

and for the record

and for the record i'm officially banning you as my kid's

i'm officially banning you as my kid's

i'm officially banning you as my kid's godmother

godmother

godmother [Music]

well come on up here lily

well come on up here lily

well come on up here lily [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

oh

oh

oh this is um

this is um

this is um unexpected

unexpected

unexpected not to me

not to me

not to me i voted for you

i voted for you

i voted for you along with a lot of other people

along with a lot of other people

along with a lot of other people what

what

what why

why

why well it seems kind of dumb now

well it seems kind of dumb now

well it seems kind of dumb now considering all this

considering all this

considering all this end of day's craziness of tonight

end of day's craziness of tonight

end of day's craziness of tonight i guess i just wanted to do something

i guess i just wanted to do something

i guess i just wanted to do something nice for you

nice for you

nice for you after how i've acted this year

after how i've acted this year

after how i've acted this year pudge patrol stuff

pudge patrol stuff

pudge patrol stuff candace stuff

speaking of

speaking of

speaking of i think maybe there's someone else who

i think maybe there's someone else who

i think maybe there's someone else who should have this dance

[Music]

hello

hello

hello no

no

no oh

oh

oh is this one important to you

is this one important to you

is this one important to you hmm

hmm

hmm you probably shouldn't have told me that

you probably shouldn't have told me that

you probably shouldn't have told me that christine

i'm afraid i've

i'm afraid i've

i'm afraid i've miscounted we're going to need her

miscounted we're going to need her

miscounted we're going to need her intestines as well

intestines as well

intestines as well wait what

wait what

wait what that was not a part of our deal partner

that was not a part of our deal partner

that was not a part of our deal partner you agreed to spare her the path to

you agreed to spare her the path to

you agreed to spare her the path to righteousness is defined by sacrifice

righteousness is defined by sacrifice

righteousness is defined by sacrifice nobody knows that more than i do

nobody knows that more than i do

nobody knows that more than i do but

but

but she's one of us

she's one of us

she's one of us you can't just kill her

take anybody else

okay

[Music]

oh

[Music]

hey

hey

hey clean this up

clean this up

clean this up [Music]

aren't you lucky

candace

are you okay

are you okay

are you okay yeah i guess yeah i don't i don't

yeah i guess yeah i don't i don't

yeah i guess yeah i don't i don't remember what happened

where's my mom

she actually saved your life

well why couldn't you save herself

[Music]

he's hungry