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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,419 --> 00:00:05,354 (GRAND ORCHESTRAL FANFARE PLAYING) 2 00:00:26,176 --> 00:00:28,110 ("SO FRESH, SO CLEAN" BY OUTKAST PLAYING) 3 00:00:28,112 --> 00:00:31,179 4 00:00:31,181 --> 00:00:33,982 ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me 5 00:00:33,984 --> 00:00:35,983 ♪ I'm dressed so fresh, so clean ♪ 6 00:00:35,985 --> 00:00:37,785 ♪ So fresh and so clean, clean ♪ 7 00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:39,854 ♪ Don't you think I'm so sexy? ♪ 8 00:00:39,856 --> 00:00:41,889 ♪ I'm dressed so fresh, so clean... ♪ 9 00:00:41,891 --> 00:00:44,425 TEDDY: Oh, my God! 10 00:00:44,427 --> 00:00:46,427 Come on. Man! 11 00:00:46,429 --> 00:00:47,962 ♪ I'm dressed so fresh, so clean... ♪ 12 00:00:47,964 --> 00:00:50,598 (MUTTERS, GROANS) 13 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:51,999 I don't know this stuff. 14 00:00:52,001 --> 00:00:53,433 That's not even close. 15 00:00:53,435 --> 00:00:55,502 No. 16 00:00:55,504 --> 00:00:57,205 WOMAN: Teddy! Dinner, baby! 17 00:00:57,207 --> 00:00:59,640 Your father's waiting! 18 00:00:59,642 --> 00:01:03,744 ♪ Created in the attic, we are the coolest mother... ♪ 19 00:01:03,746 --> 00:01:05,746 What do you mean, you're protesting 20 00:01:05,748 --> 00:01:07,514 the State Achievement Test? 21 00:01:07,516 --> 00:01:10,085 Sounds like someone's unprepared. 22 00:01:10,087 --> 00:01:11,719 - I am prepared. - Mmm. 23 00:01:11,721 --> 00:01:13,120 To take a stand. 24 00:01:13,122 --> 00:01:14,588 Pops, those standardized tests 25 00:01:14,590 --> 00:01:16,190 are culturally biased. 26 00:01:16,192 --> 00:01:19,094 They want me to calculate the average number of manatees 27 00:01:19,096 --> 00:01:20,761 that are in Florida. 28 00:01:20,763 --> 00:01:21,662 What does that have to do 29 00:01:21,664 --> 00:01:23,764 with the African-American experience? 30 00:01:23,766 --> 00:01:25,532 You hear that, Gladys? 31 00:01:25,534 --> 00:01:27,635 We got Minister Louis Farrakhan at the table. 32 00:01:27,637 --> 00:01:29,736 - (CHUCKLING) - You know what, Teddy? 33 00:01:29,738 --> 00:01:31,039 The last time I checked, 34 00:01:31,041 --> 00:01:33,474 your twin sister Denise here is black, 35 00:01:33,476 --> 00:01:36,610 and she pulled a 1500 on the practice test. 36 00:01:36,612 --> 00:01:39,512 - It was actually a 1540, Daddy. - Ah! 37 00:01:39,514 --> 00:01:42,117 You go, girl. That's my baby. (LAUGHING) 38 00:01:42,119 --> 00:01:44,818 Just doing what I do best... outshining Teddy's butt. 39 00:01:44,820 --> 00:01:46,553 (DENISE LAUGHING) 40 00:01:46,555 --> 00:01:48,923 What's this really all about, Teddy Bear? 41 00:01:48,925 --> 00:01:50,059 Hmm? 42 00:01:51,794 --> 00:01:54,095 Do you need help? 43 00:01:54,097 --> 00:01:56,699 Is that what this is all about? 44 00:01:58,868 --> 00:02:00,267 I don't know, Mommy. 45 00:02:00,269 --> 00:02:02,036 I mean... 46 00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:04,206 maybe I do need help. 47 00:02:06,075 --> 00:02:08,742 Help yourself to the goddamn study book. 48 00:02:08,744 --> 00:02:11,912 Hell, you get 400 points just for signing your name. 49 00:02:11,914 --> 00:02:14,148 You do know how to spell your name, don't you? 50 00:02:14,150 --> 00:02:16,283 - T-H-E... What? - (IMITATING BUZZER) 51 00:02:16,285 --> 00:02:17,583 You're wrong. 52 00:02:17,585 --> 00:02:18,721 Ain't no "H" in my name. 53 00:02:21,524 --> 00:02:23,491 She's spelling your legal name. 54 00:02:24,626 --> 00:02:26,193 "Theodore." 55 00:02:26,195 --> 00:02:28,528 Well, there goes those 400 points. 56 00:02:28,530 --> 00:02:30,998 She like a Chinese boy at school. 57 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,766 FATHER: Shut your pie hole! 58 00:02:32,768 --> 00:02:35,638 ("EYE OF THE TIGER" BY SURVIVOR PLAYING) 59 00:02:37,806 --> 00:02:39,075 Everyone take a seat. 60 00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:49,051 (WHISPERING): T-H-E... 61 00:02:55,191 --> 00:02:58,792 (GRUNTING MELODY OF "EYE OF THE TIGER") 62 00:02:58,794 --> 00:03:01,228 Don't even look at him. Stewart's an asshole. 63 00:03:01,230 --> 00:03:04,964 Okay, students, please break the seal on your test books 64 00:03:04,966 --> 00:03:06,102 and begin. 65 00:03:07,703 --> 00:03:09,271 ♪ 66 00:03:17,612 --> 00:03:18,247 (GRUNTS) 67 00:03:19,315 --> 00:03:20,816 (GRUNTS) 68 00:03:27,889 --> 00:03:30,593 (GRUNTING) 69 00:03:31,727 --> 00:03:33,129 (GRUNTS, SHOUTS) 70 00:03:37,966 --> 00:03:39,165 Done. 71 00:03:39,167 --> 00:03:40,733 You finished the whole test? 72 00:03:40,735 --> 00:03:42,302 No, I'm done with this. 73 00:03:42,304 --> 00:03:44,071 I'm finished! 74 00:03:44,073 --> 00:03:45,772 Do I look like a sheep to you, Marv? 75 00:03:45,774 --> 00:03:47,207 No. 76 00:03:47,209 --> 00:03:49,008 You all can continue to be sheep. 77 00:03:49,010 --> 00:03:50,643 I'm not gonna be nobody's sheep. 78 00:03:50,645 --> 00:03:51,711 Mr. Walker. 79 00:03:51,713 --> 00:03:52,945 (BLEATING) 80 00:03:52,947 --> 00:03:55,049 - (LAUGHS) - I don't know how 81 00:03:55,051 --> 00:03:57,217 to make the noise, but you know what I'm trying to say. 82 00:03:57,219 --> 00:03:58,718 Y'all can keep falling for the... 83 00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:00,753 for the man's plan if you want to, 84 00:04:00,755 --> 00:04:03,222 but y'all gonna end up in stupid student debt. 85 00:04:03,224 --> 00:04:05,091 You look like bad credit already. 86 00:04:05,093 --> 00:04:06,794 - (LAUGHING) - This whole section right here 87 00:04:06,796 --> 00:04:10,663 reeks of Discover cards, with your broke ass. 88 00:04:10,665 --> 00:04:12,366 I'm gonna be a winner. I'm gonna succeed 89 00:04:12,368 --> 00:04:15,368 in the school of life, doing real stuff. 90 00:04:15,370 --> 00:04:17,103 I'm gonna get me a real fly car, 91 00:04:17,105 --> 00:04:18,872 and I'm gonna have me a nice girl. 92 00:04:18,874 --> 00:04:19,973 Y'all ain't gonna make it. 93 00:04:19,975 --> 00:04:21,674 Ted, get out! 94 00:04:21,676 --> 00:04:22,975 Denise got hair on her titties. 95 00:04:22,977 --> 00:04:24,210 - (GASPING) - Cat's out of the bag. 96 00:04:24,212 --> 00:04:25,378 Get out! You're embarrassing us! 97 00:04:25,380 --> 00:04:26,813 TEDDY: Y'all some sheep! 98 00:04:26,815 --> 00:04:28,014 Y'all sheep! 99 00:04:28,016 --> 00:04:29,714 In your face! 100 00:04:29,716 --> 00:04:31,751 Ha-ha, stupid. 101 00:04:31,753 --> 00:04:33,253 Now I'm gonna be rolling in the dough. 102 00:04:33,255 --> 00:04:34,254 - (LAUGHS) - (TEDDY BLEATING) 103 00:04:34,256 --> 00:04:35,822 And by the way, Denise... 104 00:04:35,824 --> 00:04:37,356 I think Denise has incredible titties. 105 00:04:37,358 --> 00:04:39,392 Marv, shut up! 106 00:04:39,394 --> 00:04:41,327 ♪ Hey, Jim, you know them old sugar daddies ♪ 107 00:04:41,329 --> 00:04:43,063 ♪ They be trickin', they tell them girls ♪ 108 00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:44,398 ♪ I said you could have 109 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,998 ♪ Whatever you like, if you like ♪ 110 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,334 ♪ I said you could have 111 00:04:47,336 --> 00:04:49,368 ♪ Whatever you like, if you like ♪ 112 00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:51,771 ♪ Yeah, yeah, stacks on deck 113 00:04:51,773 --> 00:04:53,705 ♪ Patrón on ice 114 00:04:53,707 --> 00:04:55,442 ♪ And we can pop bottles all night ♪ 115 00:04:55,444 --> 00:04:57,043 ♪ And, baby, you could have 116 00:04:57,045 --> 00:04:58,878 ♪ Whatever you like, if you like ♪ 117 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:00,213 ♪ I said you could have 118 00:05:00,215 --> 00:05:02,215 ♪ Whatever you like, if you like ♪ 119 00:05:02,217 --> 00:05:06,986 ♪ Yeah, baby, I could treat you so special, so nice ♪ 120 00:05:06,988 --> 00:05:09,188 ♪ Gas up a jet for you tonight and, baby, you could go ♪ 121 00:05:09,190 --> 00:05:11,791 ♪ Wherever you like, if you like ♪ 122 00:05:11,793 --> 00:05:13,226 ♪ I said you could have 123 00:05:13,228 --> 00:05:15,729 ♪ Whatever you like, if you like, yeah ♪ 124 00:05:17,198 --> 00:05:19,466 ♪ Any time you want to, pick up the telephone ♪ 125 00:05:19,468 --> 00:05:22,101 ♪ You know it ain't nothin' to drop a couple stacks... ♪ 126 00:05:22,103 --> 00:05:24,403 This project has taken over my life. 127 00:05:24,405 --> 00:05:26,805 - Come on. - God, I can't wait to sleep. 128 00:05:26,807 --> 00:05:27,974 Come here. 129 00:05:27,976 --> 00:05:29,708 - Thank you, baby. - No problem. 130 00:05:29,710 --> 00:05:32,278 Oh, I'm so nervous about tonight. 131 00:05:32,280 --> 00:05:33,480 Thank God you're coming. 132 00:05:33,482 --> 00:05:35,114 Why are you nervous? 133 00:05:35,116 --> 00:05:36,382 Lis, you did an amazing job. 134 00:05:36,384 --> 00:05:37,283 You're gonna kill this. 135 00:05:37,285 --> 00:05:39,751 Gonna be the hottest spot in Atlanta. 136 00:05:39,753 --> 00:05:40,952 (SIGHS) Okay. 137 00:05:40,954 --> 00:05:44,023 Will, uh... will the lovely Maya 138 00:05:44,025 --> 00:05:45,758 be joining us this evening as well? 139 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:47,493 I don't like him. 140 00:05:47,495 --> 00:05:49,162 Chef Clemont invited my entire team 141 00:05:49,164 --> 00:05:51,130 to dinner tonight, so be nice, okay? 142 00:05:51,132 --> 00:05:53,199 - Yes. - Maybe try to compliment her. 143 00:05:53,201 --> 00:05:55,268 - Okay. - Love you. 144 00:05:55,270 --> 00:05:57,303 - Okay. Bye. - Love you. Have a good day. 145 00:05:57,305 --> 00:05:58,471 Hey, Maya! 146 00:05:58,473 --> 00:06:00,406 Hey, Teddy. 147 00:06:00,408 --> 00:06:02,275 Somebody looks extremely attractive today. 148 00:06:02,277 --> 00:06:03,842 Thank you. 149 00:06:03,844 --> 00:06:05,478 Not that I'm looking at you the same way 150 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,481 I look at my woman, because I wouldn't do that. 151 00:06:07,483 --> 00:06:09,382 Let's just go. Let's go. 152 00:06:09,384 --> 00:06:11,783 - I love the weave! - Teddy! 153 00:06:11,785 --> 00:06:13,519 Or the wig. Whichever... 154 00:06:13,521 --> 00:06:14,819 This is my hair. 155 00:06:14,821 --> 00:06:16,188 - You did that, boo. - Stop. 156 00:06:16,190 --> 00:06:17,822 I'm just going to stop. 157 00:06:17,824 --> 00:06:18,991 You get what I'm trying to do. 158 00:06:18,993 --> 00:06:19,992 He's jealous of your beauty. 159 00:06:19,994 --> 00:06:21,294 I blew it. 160 00:06:21,296 --> 00:06:22,997 I definitely blew that. 161 00:06:24,898 --> 00:06:27,233 ♪ I got a new spring in my step... ♪ 162 00:06:27,235 --> 00:06:28,367 - Oh, look, there's Teddy. - (HORN HONKS) 163 00:06:28,369 --> 00:06:29,834 - Teddy! - Yo, Teddy! 164 00:06:29,836 --> 00:06:31,971 ♪ It's looking pretty good 165 00:06:31,973 --> 00:06:34,173 ♪ Up ahead... 166 00:06:34,175 --> 00:06:36,142 My name is Teddy, and I am here to make 167 00:06:36,144 --> 00:06:37,443 your barbecue dreams come true. 168 00:06:37,445 --> 00:06:39,445 Now, Esther, you're a small woman, 169 00:06:39,447 --> 00:06:41,179 but I know you have a big heart, 170 00:06:41,181 --> 00:06:43,516 which is why I recommend the Big Steel for you. 171 00:06:43,518 --> 00:06:45,551 Not a lot of women can take this much steel, 172 00:06:45,553 --> 00:06:46,986 - but I know you can. - Mmm! 173 00:06:46,988 --> 00:06:49,087 The Pitbull, huh? 174 00:06:49,089 --> 00:06:51,122 ¿Como te llamas? Me llamo Pitbull. 175 00:06:51,124 --> 00:06:53,525 ¡Dale! (CHUCKLES) 176 00:06:53,527 --> 00:06:55,194 You're not Spanish, are you? 177 00:06:55,196 --> 00:06:57,129 I can see it in your eyes, Morris. 178 00:06:57,131 --> 00:06:58,531 But I can also tell that your wife... 179 00:06:58,533 --> 00:07:00,168 you know, your wife isn't on the same page. 180 00:07:01,536 --> 00:07:03,268 I mean, it's not like she completely 181 00:07:03,270 --> 00:07:04,869 controls the purse strings. 182 00:07:04,871 --> 00:07:07,106 (CAR HORN HONKING) 183 00:07:07,108 --> 00:07:09,075 Enjoy it. 184 00:07:09,077 --> 00:07:11,009 Don't you let me down. 185 00:07:11,011 --> 00:07:12,210 (CLAPPING) 186 00:07:12,212 --> 00:07:13,346 (LAUGHS) 187 00:07:13,348 --> 00:07:15,347 You better stop it, man. 188 00:07:15,349 --> 00:07:16,381 Don't you start that. 189 00:07:16,383 --> 00:07:18,050 That was a master class. 190 00:07:18,052 --> 00:07:20,019 I couldn't get Bobby Flay to buy that beast. 191 00:07:20,021 --> 00:07:22,087 You know what? Once I saw the man purse, 192 00:07:22,089 --> 00:07:24,089 the guy was putty in my hands. He really was. 193 00:07:24,091 --> 00:07:25,123 (BOTH LAUGHING) 194 00:07:25,125 --> 00:07:26,925 Teddy, I just want you to know 195 00:07:26,927 --> 00:07:29,361 you are like the son I never had. 196 00:07:29,363 --> 00:07:31,399 Well, I mean, come on, you got Joe Junior. 197 00:07:33,501 --> 00:07:35,368 Well, yeah, but he's the son I do have, 198 00:07:35,370 --> 00:07:37,570 and I'm just not all that crazy about it. 199 00:07:37,572 --> 00:07:39,237 I mean, look at him. 200 00:07:39,239 --> 00:07:42,141 But my point is this... all those years ago, 201 00:07:42,143 --> 00:07:44,610 I took a chance on a pimply-faced teenager. 202 00:07:44,612 --> 00:07:47,212 My little Gary Coleman. 203 00:07:47,214 --> 00:07:48,614 My little Webster. 204 00:07:48,616 --> 00:07:52,050 And it turned out great for both of us. 205 00:07:52,052 --> 00:07:55,123 So I've decided, when I retire... 206 00:07:56,491 --> 00:07:58,591 I'm turning Barbecue City... 207 00:07:58,593 --> 00:08:01,926 over... to you. 208 00:08:01,928 --> 00:08:03,595 Excuse me? 209 00:08:03,597 --> 00:08:05,330 - What? - (CHUCKLING) 210 00:08:05,332 --> 00:08:07,233 Uh, don't-don't shit me. 211 00:08:07,235 --> 00:08:08,334 I'm serious. 212 00:08:08,336 --> 00:08:10,001 Oh, my God, Joe. 213 00:08:10,003 --> 00:08:11,403 I just got-got goose bumps. 214 00:08:11,405 --> 00:08:13,872 - Yes! - I got goose bumps all over. 215 00:08:13,874 --> 00:08:15,373 I don't know what to say, man. Thank you. 216 00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:17,108 No. Thank you... 217 00:08:17,110 --> 00:08:18,477 son. 218 00:08:18,479 --> 00:08:20,646 What you talkin' 'bout, Joe? 219 00:08:20,648 --> 00:08:22,881 - (LAUGHING) - You gotta come here, Mr. Drummond. 220 00:08:22,883 --> 00:08:23,917 Come here. 221 00:08:25,118 --> 00:08:27,054 JOE: All yours, Teddy. 222 00:08:28,455 --> 00:08:29,988 - What do you think? - Oh... 223 00:08:29,990 --> 00:08:31,590 (CHUCKLES) It's amazing. 224 00:08:31,592 --> 00:08:32,525 - Really? - Yeah. 225 00:08:32,527 --> 00:08:34,993 But as your unofficial financial advisor, 226 00:08:34,995 --> 00:08:36,294 I'm obligated to tell you 227 00:08:36,296 --> 00:08:38,296 that this ring is way out of your budget. 228 00:08:38,298 --> 00:08:39,564 Relax. 229 00:08:39,566 --> 00:08:40,598 Lisa's cool as hell. 230 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,000 She knows who you are. 231 00:08:42,002 --> 00:08:43,636 Lisa does not know who I am. 232 00:08:43,638 --> 00:08:46,338 Lisa knows that I'm a successful barbecue salesman. 233 00:08:46,340 --> 00:08:48,173 Marvin knows that Teddy's a high school dropout 234 00:08:48,175 --> 00:08:50,208 that's living paycheck to paycheck 235 00:08:50,210 --> 00:08:52,243 'cause I'm with a woman that's way above my weight class. 236 00:08:52,245 --> 00:08:54,613 Your life is built on a financial house of cards. 237 00:08:54,615 --> 00:08:56,649 - Stop it. - The Porsche, the duplex. 238 00:08:56,651 --> 00:08:58,684 What are you trying to prove? 239 00:08:58,686 --> 00:09:00,185 Plus, every single time we go out, 240 00:09:00,187 --> 00:09:01,553 she offers to pay for the check. 241 00:09:01,555 --> 00:09:03,254 The day that I let her put down her plastic 242 00:09:03,256 --> 00:09:04,422 is the day that I lose her. 243 00:09:04,424 --> 00:09:06,692 - And you know that. - I don't know why I was so nervous. 244 00:09:06,694 --> 00:09:08,093 - LISA: It's coming together. - Hey. 245 00:09:08,095 --> 00:09:09,627 - Hi. - Lisa. 246 00:09:09,629 --> 00:09:11,463 - Hi! - Bienvenue. 247 00:09:11,465 --> 00:09:14,366 Dude, Lisa's the best thing that ever happened to me. 248 00:09:14,368 --> 00:09:17,134 I don't want to mess this one up, man. 249 00:09:17,136 --> 00:09:19,003 - (LAUGHING): I told them. - He did. 250 00:09:19,005 --> 00:09:20,271 - (LAUGHTER) - He actually said that. 251 00:09:20,273 --> 00:09:21,706 - Ooh. - Look at that. 252 00:09:21,708 --> 00:09:23,041 - That looks amazing. - Some dessert. 253 00:09:23,043 --> 00:09:24,242 - Wow. - Wow. Thank you. 254 00:09:24,244 --> 00:09:26,211 - Mmm. - Thank you so much. - WAITER: Chef Clemont also said 255 00:09:26,213 --> 00:09:27,412 that there will be no check. 256 00:09:27,414 --> 00:09:29,647 This is all on him. 257 00:09:29,649 --> 00:09:31,516 - Wow. - LISA: I knew he would try this. 258 00:09:31,518 --> 00:09:33,518 You know what? Tell him I appreciate it, 259 00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:35,120 - but I insist on paying. - Okay. 260 00:09:35,122 --> 00:09:36,454 - Yeah. - Okay, well, just wait. 261 00:09:36,456 --> 00:09:38,323 Well, hold on, now, honey. 262 00:09:38,325 --> 00:09:39,457 Honey, you don't want to offend him. 263 00:09:39,459 --> 00:09:41,058 You're his guest, right? 264 00:09:41,060 --> 00:09:42,527 Trust me, you never take a free meal from a client. 265 00:09:42,529 --> 00:09:43,661 That way, you don't owe them anything. 266 00:09:43,663 --> 00:09:45,263 - That's true. - Thank you, Lisa. 267 00:09:45,265 --> 00:09:46,364 - I appreciate it. - You know. 268 00:09:46,366 --> 00:09:47,532 - Um... - WAITER: Whenever you're ready. 269 00:09:47,534 --> 00:09:49,066 LISA: Thank you. 270 00:09:49,068 --> 00:09:50,635 You know what? You know what, then, baby? 271 00:09:50,637 --> 00:09:52,136 If that's the case, sweetie, then let me... 272 00:09:52,138 --> 00:09:53,504 No. Baby, this is my thing. 273 00:09:53,506 --> 00:09:55,340 There's like eight of us. I got it. 274 00:09:55,342 --> 00:09:57,142 - You can probably write it off, right? - Yes. 275 00:09:57,144 --> 00:09:59,344 I didn't think about that. It is a business expense. 276 00:09:59,346 --> 00:10:00,612 - Okay. - LISA: Yeah. - Come on. 277 00:10:00,614 --> 00:10:02,045 MAYA: W-W-Wait, wait. Hold-hold up, Lis. 278 00:10:02,047 --> 00:10:04,448 It is a business expense, but, Lis... 279 00:10:04,450 --> 00:10:06,418 it's clear that Teddy really wants to treat. 280 00:10:06,420 --> 00:10:10,188 We're all here celebrating you, so let him. 281 00:10:10,190 --> 00:10:11,489 (TEDDY SIGHS QUIETLY) 282 00:10:11,491 --> 00:10:13,223 Right, Teddy? 283 00:10:13,225 --> 00:10:14,692 (CHUCKLES) Yes. 284 00:10:14,694 --> 00:10:15,760 Wow. 285 00:10:15,762 --> 00:10:18,530 Yes. Wh-Why aren't we closer? 286 00:10:18,532 --> 00:10:19,764 - 'Cause you get me. - (CHUCKLES) Mmm. 287 00:10:19,766 --> 00:10:21,433 I have it. I got it. 288 00:10:21,435 --> 00:10:22,634 - I love you. - Love you back. 289 00:10:22,636 --> 00:10:24,001 Black love. 290 00:10:24,003 --> 00:10:25,369 TEDDY: Okay. 291 00:10:25,371 --> 00:10:27,237 Oh, shit. 292 00:10:27,239 --> 00:10:28,405 All right, Marvin, hit me. 293 00:10:28,407 --> 00:10:29,641 Thank you. 294 00:10:29,643 --> 00:10:31,743 - This is so good. - One of my favorite things that he does. 295 00:10:31,745 --> 00:10:33,478 - That caramel tart, he's known for it. - TEDDY: All right. 296 00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:35,447 Oh, I gotta get in that. 297 00:10:35,449 --> 00:10:37,181 Definitely gonna try that. 298 00:10:37,183 --> 00:10:38,248 Uh-uh. 299 00:10:38,250 --> 00:10:39,751 - MAYA: So amazing. - LISA: Aren't these beautiful? 300 00:10:39,753 --> 00:10:41,452 - He did these just for us. - Really? 301 00:10:41,454 --> 00:10:43,121 Yeah. You should try this caramel. 302 00:10:43,123 --> 00:10:44,255 I'm gonna... I'm gonna take a little bit of it. 303 00:10:44,257 --> 00:10:46,591 - Get in there. - Take me through... take me through... 304 00:10:46,593 --> 00:10:48,158 Lisa, take me through. So this is a chair. 305 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:49,293 Straight up, it's a chair. 306 00:10:49,295 --> 00:10:51,061 I know that much, but what... tell me about... give me 307 00:10:51,063 --> 00:10:52,029 the Behind the Music about the chair. 308 00:10:52,031 --> 00:10:53,263 Pretend I'm on VH1 or something like that. 309 00:10:53,265 --> 00:10:55,400 Well, actually, these chairs have a very interesting story. 310 00:10:55,402 --> 00:10:56,768 They're from Denmark. 311 00:10:56,770 --> 00:10:58,770 - Found them in a warehouse. - MARVIN: Whoa. 312 00:10:58,772 --> 00:11:01,438 Mid-century, modern, kind of rounded. 313 00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:02,372 - MARVIN: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - (GROANS QUIETLY) 314 00:11:02,374 --> 00:11:03,574 - I know it's blue and... - (PLUCKING SOUND) 315 00:11:03,576 --> 00:11:05,476 - LISA: I didn't know you were so into chairs. - (GRUNTS) 316 00:11:05,478 --> 00:11:06,578 Oh, you would not believe... I'll go home, 317 00:11:06,580 --> 00:11:07,779 I'll look at my chair, I get turned on in a second. 318 00:11:07,781 --> 00:11:09,814 - It's just a weird fetish. - You would love these because... 319 00:11:09,816 --> 00:11:12,282 I don't know if you noticed the cerulean kind of 320 00:11:12,284 --> 00:11:13,617 - undertone of the wallpaper... - Woof. 321 00:11:13,619 --> 00:11:16,220 ...but we kind of wanted to tie it all together, 322 00:11:16,222 --> 00:11:18,089 to kind of offset the harder, more straighter lines, 323 00:11:18,091 --> 00:11:19,624 - and... - What is that? I... 324 00:11:19,626 --> 00:11:21,559 I found this fabric in Italy. It's 100%... 325 00:11:21,561 --> 00:11:23,160 Oh, my God. 326 00:11:23,162 --> 00:11:23,962 (CHUCKLES) 327 00:11:23,964 --> 00:11:25,797 - Oh, my God! - (UTENSILS DROPPING) 328 00:11:25,799 --> 00:11:28,065 - No, no, no! - What? 329 00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:29,801 Is there a problem with the dessert, sir? 330 00:11:29,803 --> 00:11:31,503 I think that's pubic hair in the cake. 331 00:11:31,505 --> 00:11:33,070 - MARVIN: Oh, my God. - LISA: Oh, my gosh. 332 00:11:33,072 --> 00:11:34,505 Is this pubic hair in my damn dessert? 333 00:11:34,507 --> 00:11:35,341 May I? 334 00:11:37,343 --> 00:11:39,376 - I'm sorry, what? - May I please take it? 335 00:11:39,378 --> 00:11:41,178 Literally, I'm telling you what it is. 336 00:11:41,180 --> 00:11:42,114 Uh... 337 00:11:48,087 --> 00:11:50,122 This is way too many pubes. 338 00:11:51,156 --> 00:11:52,256 What does that mean? 339 00:11:52,258 --> 00:11:53,625 I mean, one is too many pubes. 340 00:11:53,627 --> 00:11:55,158 If you could tell the chef. 341 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:56,628 Thank you. Thank you for taking care of this for us. 342 00:11:56,630 --> 00:11:58,529 I believe you planted these. 343 00:11:58,531 --> 00:12:00,764 - (LISA GASPS) - No, no, no. - What'd you just say? 344 00:12:00,766 --> 00:12:02,599 MARVIN: Stop. I got this. That's insane of you. 345 00:12:02,601 --> 00:12:04,368 I've known this man my entire life. 346 00:12:04,370 --> 00:12:06,504 - He's not a pube planter, sir. - TEDDY: No, no, no. 347 00:12:06,506 --> 00:12:08,539 Stop, Marv. Stop. Maybe you planted them. 348 00:12:08,541 --> 00:12:10,107 - What? - Boom. 349 00:12:10,109 --> 00:12:11,675 I risked my life coming to this country 350 00:12:11,677 --> 00:12:13,644 so I can plant pubes on some random guy's cheesecake? 351 00:12:13,646 --> 00:12:15,212 I don't know what you're into, man. 352 00:12:15,214 --> 00:12:16,880 And I have a flash of news for you, guy. 353 00:12:16,882 --> 00:12:19,416 - I man-scape down here. - TEDDY: Okay. 354 00:12:19,418 --> 00:12:21,418 That's my woman, and that's too much information. 355 00:12:21,420 --> 00:12:23,654 And these are the pubes 356 00:12:23,656 --> 00:12:25,656 of an African-American guy. 357 00:12:25,658 --> 00:12:28,224 - MARVIN: Oh, shit. - What? That's racist, man. 358 00:12:28,226 --> 00:12:29,459 It's descriptive. 359 00:12:29,461 --> 00:12:31,395 - "Descriptive," my ass. That's racist. - Luis? 360 00:12:31,397 --> 00:12:33,730 That's what they are... Afro pubes. 361 00:12:33,732 --> 00:12:34,731 Friends, friends, what is happening? 362 00:12:34,733 --> 00:12:35,732 What is happening? 363 00:12:35,734 --> 00:12:37,167 Pubes and racism. 364 00:12:37,169 --> 00:12:38,368 TEDDY: Chef Clemont... 365 00:12:38,370 --> 00:12:40,269 (SPEAKS FRENCH) 366 00:12:40,271 --> 00:12:41,404 - Mm-hmm. - All right? I go to take 367 00:12:41,406 --> 00:12:42,539 a bite of my cheesecake. 368 00:12:42,541 --> 00:12:44,341 There's what appears to be pubic hair 369 00:12:44,343 --> 00:12:45,442 in my cake. 370 00:12:45,444 --> 00:12:46,677 That he planted with his 371 00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:48,712 African-American short-and-curlies. 372 00:12:48,714 --> 00:12:49,646 Say "African-American" again, 373 00:12:49,648 --> 00:12:51,515 and I'm-a get dark and curly in your ass! 374 00:12:51,517 --> 00:12:53,517 - I will say it again! - All right, say it again! 375 00:12:53,519 --> 00:12:55,385 (CLAMORING) 376 00:12:55,387 --> 00:12:56,888 CLEMONT: Please, everyone, calm down. 377 00:12:56,890 --> 00:12:59,156 I am mortified by this. I am so sorry here, everyone. 378 00:12:59,158 --> 00:13:01,358 - Uh, the meal is on me. - LUIS: No. 379 00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:02,593 This is what he wants. 380 00:13:02,595 --> 00:13:04,561 - Luis, I need to speak to you in the kitchen. - Thank you. 381 00:13:04,563 --> 00:13:05,562 Go in the kitchen, man. 382 00:13:05,564 --> 00:13:06,864 You're going to die. 383 00:13:06,866 --> 00:13:08,699 Luis, I need to speak to you in the kitchen. 384 00:13:08,701 --> 00:13:10,233 You messed with the wrong guy. 385 00:13:10,235 --> 00:13:11,435 CLEMONT: Luis, right now. 386 00:13:11,437 --> 00:13:12,669 - Right now. - You better go. 387 00:13:12,671 --> 00:13:13,704 Okay, baby, just... 388 00:13:13,706 --> 00:13:14,938 You better go! 389 00:13:14,940 --> 00:13:16,840 - Gotta be kidding me. - LUIS: Chef, please, 390 00:13:16,842 --> 00:13:19,209 - he's been... - I, uh... I don't want to get into it. 391 00:13:19,211 --> 00:13:21,612 Feel like it's a cloud of racism around me. 392 00:13:21,614 --> 00:13:23,447 - (CRICKETS CHIRPING) - (LISA SIGHS) 393 00:13:23,449 --> 00:13:24,848 Teddy, what is going on? 394 00:13:24,850 --> 00:13:26,516 Haven't we had enough surprises tonight? 395 00:13:26,518 --> 00:13:28,517 Well, I promise you 396 00:13:28,519 --> 00:13:31,254 that this one will be worth it, okay? 397 00:13:31,256 --> 00:13:32,623 Oh, my God. 398 00:13:32,625 --> 00:13:34,458 What's all this? 399 00:13:34,460 --> 00:13:37,628 Well, I will tell you what's going on. 400 00:13:37,630 --> 00:13:39,395 So, listen to this. 401 00:13:39,397 --> 00:13:42,332 Joe told me today that when he retires 402 00:13:42,334 --> 00:13:44,234 he's leaving all of this to me. 403 00:13:44,236 --> 00:13:46,803 - Baby, that's amazing. - I mean, it's life-changing. 404 00:13:46,805 --> 00:13:49,271 - Yeah. - And maybe you could 405 00:13:49,273 --> 00:13:51,574 put your touch on this place, change the design, 406 00:13:51,576 --> 00:13:53,342 help take it to the next level? 407 00:13:53,344 --> 00:13:54,745 I'm so proud of you. Yeah. 408 00:13:54,747 --> 00:13:55,946 - Maybe we expand? - Yes. 409 00:13:55,948 --> 00:13:57,381 - Franchise, even? - Yeah. 410 00:13:57,383 --> 00:13:58,682 Yes. Oh, yeah. 411 00:13:58,684 --> 00:14:00,383 Baby, we-we could do a lot with this place. 412 00:14:00,385 --> 00:14:01,685 First of all, we could change the logo. 413 00:14:01,687 --> 00:14:03,887 "Barbecue Nation." "Barbecue Safari." 414 00:14:03,889 --> 00:14:05,622 I mean, there are so many things we could do. 415 00:14:05,624 --> 00:14:06,990 Honestly, I have so many ideas. 416 00:14:06,992 --> 00:14:08,159 - (TEDDY CLEARS THROAT) - I... 417 00:14:10,429 --> 00:14:12,328 I just know that with you by my side, 418 00:14:12,330 --> 00:14:13,699 that anything is possible. 419 00:14:17,235 --> 00:14:18,268 (GASPS) 420 00:14:18,270 --> 00:14:20,372 Oh, my God. 421 00:14:23,241 --> 00:14:24,642 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 422 00:14:26,678 --> 00:14:28,878 - Yes. - Yes? 423 00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:30,947 - (LAUGHING): Yes! Yes! - (CHUCKLING): Yes? 424 00:14:30,949 --> 00:14:32,716 - (TEDDY GRUNTS) - LISA: Mmm. 425 00:14:32,718 --> 00:14:34,519 BOTH: Mmm, mmm. 426 00:14:35,620 --> 00:14:36,787 Wait, the ring. Here. 427 00:14:36,789 --> 00:14:38,254 You gotta put the... put the ring on. 428 00:14:38,256 --> 00:14:39,522 Oh, my God. 429 00:14:39,524 --> 00:14:41,892 - I love it. - Let's celebrate, then. 430 00:14:41,894 --> 00:14:44,326 - Huh? You know I had to get some champagne. - Oh, my God. 431 00:14:44,328 --> 00:14:46,328 I said, "Look, uh, my baby gonna like it." 432 00:14:46,330 --> 00:14:47,764 - (GAS HISSING) - (LISA CHUCKLING) 433 00:14:47,766 --> 00:14:49,732 TEDDY: Let me pour some champagne for my fiancée. 434 00:14:49,734 --> 00:14:51,300 LISA: "Fiancée." 435 00:14:51,302 --> 00:14:52,968 TEDDY: All right, let's make a toast. 436 00:14:52,970 --> 00:14:55,507 - To us. - To us. 437 00:14:56,508 --> 00:14:58,309 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 438 00:14:59,444 --> 00:15:00,676 (TEDDY SIGHS, SNIFFS) 439 00:15:00,678 --> 00:15:01,877 - Baby? - Hmm? 440 00:15:01,879 --> 00:15:03,045 Do you smell gas? 441 00:15:03,047 --> 00:15:04,647 I was nervous, babe. 442 00:15:04,649 --> 00:15:06,750 I didn't know you'd smell it. I tried to... 443 00:15:06,752 --> 00:15:08,417 No, that's, um... 444 00:15:08,419 --> 00:15:10,352 Actual... like, the propane? 445 00:15:10,354 --> 00:15:11,487 Why don't you go stand outside, 446 00:15:11,489 --> 00:15:13,789 I'll situate everything in here, and I'll get you home. 447 00:15:13,791 --> 00:15:14,957 - Okay. - Love you. 448 00:15:14,959 --> 00:15:16,325 Be ready. 449 00:15:16,327 --> 00:15:17,561 TEDDY: Mm-hmm. 450 00:15:17,563 --> 00:15:19,295 LISA: So, guys... 451 00:15:19,297 --> 00:15:22,800 my sweet little Teddy Bear just popped the question. 452 00:15:25,703 --> 00:15:26,802 (BLOWS) 453 00:15:26,804 --> 00:15:27,972 And big surprise... 454 00:15:29,373 --> 00:15:30,807 (SIGHS) 455 00:15:30,809 --> 00:15:32,776 I said yes! 456 00:15:32,778 --> 00:15:34,543 - (ELECTRICAL BUZZING) - Shit! 457 00:15:34,545 --> 00:15:36,514 (TEDDY SCREAMING) 458 00:15:39,517 --> 00:15:40,716 - (GASPS) - (TEDDY GROANING) 459 00:15:40,718 --> 00:15:43,720 Oh, shit. Oh, shit! 460 00:15:43,722 --> 00:15:45,554 Oh, God! Baby. 461 00:15:45,556 --> 00:15:47,792 (SCREAMS, WHIMPERS) 462 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:50,392 Teddy, are you okay? 463 00:15:50,394 --> 00:15:53,429 I need you to tell my fiancée there's... 464 00:15:53,431 --> 00:15:54,998 there's been an accident. 465 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,933 Baby, it's me. 466 00:15:56,935 --> 00:15:59,635 - (WHIMPERS) - Can you see me? Teddy? 467 00:15:59,637 --> 00:16:01,537 I'm your fiancée. 468 00:16:01,539 --> 00:16:02,905 Good. 469 00:16:02,907 --> 00:16:04,874 I've been in an accident. 470 00:16:04,876 --> 00:16:06,076 Oh, baby. 471 00:16:06,078 --> 00:16:08,346 (GROANING) 472 00:16:09,914 --> 00:16:12,481 MARVIN: So, Joe didn't have insurance? 473 00:16:12,483 --> 00:16:14,016 Yeah, of course he did, Marv. 474 00:16:14,018 --> 00:16:16,118 He took the money and ran off to Florida. 475 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:18,487 Dude, I've been looking for a job everywhere, man. 476 00:16:18,489 --> 00:16:20,689 But there are no decent sales jobs for 477 00:16:20,691 --> 00:16:22,491 an Employee of the Month at Barbecue City. 478 00:16:22,493 --> 00:16:24,827 We'd hire you here, but you need to get your GED. 479 00:16:24,829 --> 00:16:27,462 Think about it. These guys bullshit clients 480 00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:29,698 all day about funds they don't understand. 481 00:16:29,700 --> 00:16:30,533 You would be a natural. 482 00:16:30,535 --> 00:16:31,801 So you're saying that if I graduated 483 00:16:31,803 --> 00:16:34,570 - from high school, that then you could get me a job here? - Yeah. 484 00:16:34,572 --> 00:16:36,872 But you hate school, so why are we even having 485 00:16:36,874 --> 00:16:38,741 - this conversation? - No, no, no. I'm not talking 486 00:16:38,743 --> 00:16:39,975 about going to school. 487 00:16:39,977 --> 00:16:41,610 I'm talking about getting my GED. 488 00:16:41,612 --> 00:16:42,845 And that's different. 489 00:16:42,847 --> 00:16:44,080 See, to get my GED, 490 00:16:44,082 --> 00:16:45,948 all I gotta do is go to the school, 491 00:16:45,950 --> 00:16:47,149 charm the principal a little bit. 492 00:16:47,151 --> 00:16:48,984 - Right? Get what I want. - Yeah. 493 00:16:48,986 --> 00:16:51,519 Which is my GED. Sounds pretty easy to me, Marv. 494 00:16:51,521 --> 00:16:54,490 - If you got your GED... - Huh? 495 00:16:54,492 --> 00:16:56,492 I could probably hook you up. 496 00:16:56,494 --> 00:16:58,027 Listen to me, though. Stop it. Stop, okay? 497 00:16:58,029 --> 00:17:00,395 Do yourself a favor, and do not tell Lisa about this 498 00:17:00,397 --> 00:17:01,764 until it's a done deal. 499 00:17:01,766 --> 00:17:04,166 Now, you know I'm smarter than that, Marv. 500 00:17:04,168 --> 00:17:05,835 You're gonna be a financial analyst? 501 00:17:05,837 --> 00:17:07,469 TEDDY: Yes, I am. 502 00:17:07,471 --> 00:17:09,572 I am, babe, and it starts immediately. 503 00:17:09,574 --> 00:17:12,074 I was talking to Marv, and he says that they could really use 504 00:17:12,076 --> 00:17:13,876 somebody with my skill set at his firm. 505 00:17:13,878 --> 00:17:15,077 That's great. 506 00:17:15,079 --> 00:17:16,611 That's a great opportunity. 507 00:17:16,613 --> 00:17:19,182 Um... yeah, I mean, I'm-I'm... 508 00:17:19,184 --> 00:17:22,051 I'm basically pumped up about it, you know? 509 00:17:22,053 --> 00:17:23,619 - LISA: You are so resilient, baby. - Mmm. 510 00:17:23,621 --> 00:17:25,720 You keep bouncing back. I am so proud of you. 511 00:17:25,722 --> 00:17:26,889 Yep. 512 00:17:26,891 --> 00:17:28,123 I love you. 513 00:17:28,125 --> 00:17:29,727 I love you, too. 514 00:17:31,796 --> 00:17:33,929 (VEHICLE APPROACHING, HIP-HOP BLASTING OVER STEREO) 515 00:17:33,931 --> 00:17:36,131 Ma, of course the thong is gonna 516 00:17:36,133 --> 00:17:37,900 cut you in the booty hole. 517 00:17:37,902 --> 00:17:39,834 That's what it do. Look, next time Leon 518 00:17:39,836 --> 00:17:42,004 want to stick somebody in a thong, you tell him 519 00:17:42,006 --> 00:17:44,139 that he need to put it on and get a mirror 520 00:17:44,141 --> 00:17:45,774 and check and see what his balls do. 521 00:17:45,776 --> 00:17:48,743 I don't care if he is your pastor. 522 00:17:48,745 --> 00:17:52,147 Do the congregation know he a freak like that? 523 00:17:52,149 --> 00:17:53,716 (CHUCKLES) 524 00:17:53,718 --> 00:17:55,084 Hold on, Mama. 525 00:17:55,086 --> 00:17:56,886 Can I help you, sir? 526 00:17:56,888 --> 00:17:58,620 Um... 527 00:17:58,622 --> 00:18:02,057 I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. 528 00:18:02,059 --> 00:18:03,992 - Excuse me? - You kind of loud. 529 00:18:03,994 --> 00:18:05,628 Well, then get out of my car. 530 00:18:05,630 --> 00:18:07,129 I'm not in your car. I'm clearly in my car. 531 00:18:07,131 --> 00:18:09,530 - No, you're in my car. - You're speaking loud enough... 532 00:18:09,532 --> 00:18:11,133 What are you, the volume control police? 533 00:18:11,135 --> 00:18:12,467 I'm not sure if that's even a thing. 534 00:18:12,469 --> 00:18:13,601 Mind your business. 535 00:18:13,603 --> 00:18:15,103 Your business is becoming my business. 536 00:18:15,105 --> 00:18:16,604 Why don't you work on your windshield? 537 00:18:16,606 --> 00:18:17,973 Now you're really in my business. 538 00:18:17,975 --> 00:18:18,974 Probably look like a kaleidoscope 539 00:18:18,976 --> 00:18:20,142 when you look through it. 540 00:18:20,144 --> 00:18:21,542 You know, why don't you just...? 541 00:18:21,544 --> 00:18:22,510 You probably feel like a little honeybee. 542 00:18:22,512 --> 00:18:24,646 - Enough. - Looking at 18 things at one time, 543 00:18:24,648 --> 00:18:26,514 but really you're just looking at one thing. 544 00:18:26,516 --> 00:18:27,715 I-I-I'm gonna get in your business now. 545 00:18:27,717 --> 00:18:30,485 Tell your mother that she can go buy a box of G-strings 546 00:18:30,487 --> 00:18:31,787 with her nasty ass. 547 00:18:31,789 --> 00:18:33,088 You're talking about my mama now? 548 00:18:33,090 --> 00:18:35,090 Any pastor that's putting a thong on his balls 549 00:18:35,092 --> 00:18:36,524 ain't right with God. 550 00:18:36,526 --> 00:18:38,192 - Pssh. What? - Don't "pssh" me. 551 00:18:38,194 --> 00:18:39,594 - Pssh. - (GRUNTS) 552 00:18:39,596 --> 00:18:40,595 - (YOWLS) - (SQUEAKY GRUNT) 553 00:18:40,597 --> 00:18:41,997 - Yeah. - (STAMMERS) 554 00:18:41,999 --> 00:18:43,832 - (ROARS) - (HISSES) 555 00:18:43,834 --> 00:18:45,034 I bet that hurt your throat. 556 00:18:45,036 --> 00:18:46,235 Drive your car. 557 00:18:46,237 --> 00:18:47,202 What, Mama? 558 00:18:47,204 --> 00:18:48,270 Your mother's nasty. 559 00:18:48,272 --> 00:18:50,171 Girl, yeah, that's a little ol' burnt leprechaun 560 00:18:50,173 --> 00:18:53,208 sitting next to me at this damn light all in our conversation. 561 00:18:53,210 --> 00:18:55,911 - Excuse me? Hey. - Nah, girl, you know he ain't got no gold. 562 00:18:55,913 --> 00:18:57,079 You know he ain't got no gold. 563 00:18:57,081 --> 00:18:58,247 - How about you grow up? - Bye, boo! 564 00:18:58,249 --> 00:18:59,847 Hey. 565 00:18:59,849 --> 00:19:01,950 Speak... speaking of toast, if you...? 566 00:19:01,952 --> 00:19:03,818 - Goddamn it, Teddy. - (HORN HONKING) 567 00:19:03,820 --> 00:19:05,119 - I gotta work... - MAN: Hey, yo! 568 00:19:05,121 --> 00:19:06,621 - Who you honk...? - Let's go! 569 00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:08,057 I can't even see... Where's my mirror? 570 00:19:08,059 --> 00:19:10,591 - Yo, man! - Hey, who you honking at? 571 00:19:10,593 --> 00:19:13,229 ♪ 572 00:19:25,675 --> 00:19:26,841 (SCHOOL BELL RINGING) 573 00:19:26,843 --> 00:19:28,642 STEWART: So, game the system again, 574 00:19:28,644 --> 00:19:29,812 did we, Teddy? 575 00:19:29,814 --> 00:19:31,713 TEDDY: Stewart, what is your problem with me? 576 00:19:31,715 --> 00:19:33,881 My problem with you, Teddy, is that students like you 577 00:19:33,883 --> 00:19:35,817 bring down the reputation of this high school. 578 00:19:35,819 --> 00:19:37,185 - (MOCK CHATTERING) - You may have everybody else 579 00:19:37,187 --> 00:19:38,853 at this school fooled, but I know 580 00:19:38,855 --> 00:19:40,254 you're actually covering up for the fact 581 00:19:40,256 --> 00:19:42,091 that you're really just not that smart. 582 00:19:42,093 --> 00:19:44,559 In fact, you might be the dumbest student at this school. 583 00:19:44,561 --> 00:19:46,261 - ♪ Uh-oh - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 584 00:19:46,263 --> 00:19:48,997 - ♪ Yeah ♪ - ♪ Uh-oh ♪ - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 585 00:19:48,999 --> 00:19:51,698 - ♪ Uh-oh - ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. ♪ 586 00:19:51,700 --> 00:19:53,101 (CHUCKLING) 587 00:19:53,103 --> 00:19:55,170 (CHUCKLES) 588 00:19:55,172 --> 00:19:57,972 I am the music teacher. 589 00:19:57,974 --> 00:20:00,908 I don't know the first thing about teaching biology. 590 00:20:00,910 --> 00:20:02,844 STEWART: Oh, for God's sakes! 591 00:20:02,846 --> 00:20:05,613 What part of "there is no musical program" 592 00:20:05,615 --> 00:20:07,149 do you not understand, Trish? 593 00:20:07,151 --> 00:20:09,050 Nobody's getting into Ivy League schools 594 00:20:09,052 --> 00:20:10,818 - on a bassoon scholarship. - Oh, shit. 595 00:20:10,820 --> 00:20:12,687 TEDDY: You know, I'm not book smart. 596 00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:14,322 Stewart's smarter than me. 597 00:20:14,324 --> 00:20:16,024 But you know what I'm not? 598 00:20:16,026 --> 00:20:17,725 I'm not a freak of nature, Stew. 599 00:20:17,727 --> 00:20:18,993 Uh-oh, Stew. 600 00:20:18,995 --> 00:20:20,362 Don't do this, Teddy. 601 00:20:20,364 --> 00:20:22,296 Hey, quick question, everybody. 602 00:20:22,298 --> 00:20:25,133 Has anybody here ever seen Stewart with his shirt off? 603 00:20:25,135 --> 00:20:27,335 It's a birthmark. It's a birthmark! 604 00:20:27,337 --> 00:20:29,737 - If it's a birthmark, let us see it right now. - Prove it. 605 00:20:29,739 --> 00:20:31,739 You all want to see my birthmark? 606 00:20:31,741 --> 00:20:32,807 - STUDENTS: Yes! - Come on! I'm dying! 607 00:20:32,809 --> 00:20:34,008 I'll prove it. See? 608 00:20:34,010 --> 00:20:35,845 (STUDENTS YELLING AND GASPING) 609 00:20:37,180 --> 00:20:38,779 It's a birthmark! 610 00:20:38,781 --> 00:20:41,014 You got a pig's butthole on your chest, man. 611 00:20:41,016 --> 00:20:43,151 There's no hole in it, so how could it be a butthole? 612 00:20:43,153 --> 00:20:45,153 TEDDY: You got a third nipple, man! 613 00:20:45,155 --> 00:20:46,888 Who's next, Dolores? 614 00:20:46,890 --> 00:20:48,825 This young man right here. 615 00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:53,264 (CHUCKLING): Hey. What's up, Stewart? 616 00:20:55,165 --> 00:20:57,965 (SIGHS) We had good times, didn't we? 617 00:20:57,967 --> 00:21:00,902 I laugh at how much we laughed. 618 00:21:00,904 --> 00:21:03,173 (CHUCKLING): That's some... 619 00:21:08,344 --> 00:21:09,977 (TEDDY SIGHS) 620 00:21:09,979 --> 00:21:11,279 So, uh... 621 00:21:11,281 --> 00:21:13,314 how long you been the principal, man? 622 00:21:13,316 --> 00:21:14,714 Going on two years. 623 00:21:14,716 --> 00:21:16,350 - Wow. - Yeah. Wasn't easy, 624 00:21:16,352 --> 00:21:20,822 but, uh, cleaned this place up using my brain and my bat. 625 00:21:20,824 --> 00:21:22,990 As opposed to when we went to high school, 626 00:21:22,992 --> 00:21:25,293 now, if you have a "D" average, you're out. 627 00:21:25,295 --> 00:21:26,860 Can you do that? 628 00:21:26,862 --> 00:21:28,297 I can do whatever I want, Teddy. 629 00:21:29,433 --> 00:21:31,199 This my house. 630 00:21:31,201 --> 00:21:33,835 I'm sorry, what... what was that last part? 631 00:21:33,837 --> 00:21:34,938 I said look around you. 632 00:21:35,904 --> 00:21:39,407 This is... my... 633 00:21:39,409 --> 00:21:41,377 house. 634 00:21:43,446 --> 00:21:45,879 Excuse me for asking, but are you doing a black voice? 635 00:21:45,881 --> 00:21:48,048 No, no. Not a black voice. 636 00:21:48,050 --> 00:21:49,950 - You sure? - I don't hear color. 637 00:21:49,952 --> 00:21:53,020 - Mmm. - What brings you back to Piedmont, Mr. Walker? 638 00:21:53,022 --> 00:21:55,857 Right now I'm transitioning from an amazing job in sales 639 00:21:55,859 --> 00:21:57,858 to a job in finance, and the only thing 640 00:21:57,860 --> 00:21:59,826 that's really holding up this transition 641 00:21:59,828 --> 00:22:02,295 is me not having my GED. 642 00:22:02,297 --> 00:22:04,264 So, I don't know, I was thinking maybe I could 643 00:22:04,266 --> 00:22:06,400 get you to cross some T's, dot some I's. 644 00:22:06,402 --> 00:22:08,269 - (CHUCKLING) - Maybe you could do 645 00:22:08,271 --> 00:22:10,204 a favor for an old friend. 646 00:22:10,206 --> 00:22:12,273 (SIGHS) Some things just never change, huh, Teddy? 647 00:22:12,275 --> 00:22:14,107 You want me to help you 648 00:22:14,109 --> 00:22:17,311 find a shortcut to getting your diploma. 649 00:22:17,313 --> 00:22:18,446 No. 650 00:22:18,448 --> 00:22:19,880 Yes. 651 00:22:19,882 --> 00:22:21,415 Hmm. 652 00:22:21,417 --> 00:22:24,050 I wish I could. I really do. 653 00:22:24,052 --> 00:22:25,385 But you would have to go 654 00:22:25,387 --> 00:22:28,755 to night school to learn how to pass the GED test, 655 00:22:28,757 --> 00:22:31,292 and unfortunately we don't offer night school here. 656 00:22:31,294 --> 00:22:33,727 I'm so sorry, Teddy. 657 00:22:33,729 --> 00:22:35,431 Let me walk you out. 658 00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:39,866 You want to touch her? 659 00:22:39,868 --> 00:22:41,801 - I'm sorry? - Come on. 660 00:22:41,803 --> 00:22:43,970 Touch my big black bat. 661 00:22:43,972 --> 00:22:46,106 Um, no, I'm... 662 00:22:46,108 --> 00:22:48,243 Go ahead, say hi. 663 00:22:50,412 --> 00:22:53,414 Ah! (LAUGHS) 664 00:22:53,416 --> 00:22:56,217 (À LA MORGAN FREEMAN): You used to call me Crazy Stewart. 665 00:22:56,219 --> 00:22:59,788 Now you call me Batman. 666 00:23:02,858 --> 00:23:03,990 (TEDDY GROANS) 667 00:23:03,992 --> 00:23:05,193 - (LOUD BANG) - (STUDENT GASPS) 668 00:23:05,195 --> 00:23:06,927 Remove the Beats by Andre, Rudy. 669 00:23:06,929 --> 00:23:08,862 School policy... no headphones on campus 670 00:23:08,864 --> 00:23:10,464 unless you're using Rosetta Stone. 671 00:23:10,466 --> 00:23:12,832 Hey, uh... hey, Stew, you think you're taking 672 00:23:12,834 --> 00:23:14,868 the right approach here with these kids? 673 00:23:14,870 --> 00:23:16,469 They look a little stressed out, man. 674 00:23:16,471 --> 00:23:19,540 I am preparing them for the real world, Teddy, okay? 675 00:23:19,542 --> 00:23:21,775 I may not be their best friend, 676 00:23:21,777 --> 00:23:23,777 - but everyone here respects me. - Okay. 677 00:23:23,779 --> 00:23:26,012 - What the fuck, Stewart? - Uh, hey, hey, hey, hey. 678 00:23:26,014 --> 00:23:27,981 Let's watch the language, please, Miss Carter. 679 00:23:27,983 --> 00:23:30,451 Why did you add AP Calculus to my class load, 680 00:23:30,453 --> 00:23:32,219 knowing good and well I already have 681 00:23:32,221 --> 00:23:34,120 five units to teach plus night school? 682 00:23:34,122 --> 00:23:35,889 - It's too much. - Wait, hold on. 683 00:23:35,891 --> 00:23:38,158 You're... you're the night school teacher? 684 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,160 No, I'm just a bitch that like to wear blouses. 685 00:23:40,162 --> 00:23:41,861 Yes, I'm the night school teacher. 686 00:23:41,863 --> 00:23:43,397 Did you bring me some dried shamrocks, leprechaun? 687 00:23:43,399 --> 00:23:44,798 TEDDY: It's still not funny. 688 00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:46,099 Wait, well, hold up. 689 00:23:46,101 --> 00:23:47,500 Stew, why'd you just tell me that you 690 00:23:47,502 --> 00:23:48,568 don't have night school here? 691 00:23:48,570 --> 00:23:50,270 Why would you say that? 692 00:23:50,272 --> 00:23:53,940 I said that because Teddy and I went to school together. 693 00:23:53,942 --> 00:23:57,077 He is, quite frankly, a terrible student, 694 00:23:57,079 --> 00:23:58,945 and I did not want that element in here. 695 00:23:58,947 --> 00:24:00,846 I don't care if he's as dumb as a Minion. 696 00:24:00,848 --> 00:24:02,582 He is welcome to take my class if he wants. 697 00:24:02,584 --> 00:24:04,484 Thank you. Thank you for that. 698 00:24:04,486 --> 00:24:06,520 You're welcome. 'Cause you-you need it. 699 00:24:06,522 --> 00:24:09,055 Carrie, can we just take down the 'tude? 700 00:24:09,057 --> 00:24:10,190 - 'Tude? Really? - No, I'm... 701 00:24:10,192 --> 00:24:12,158 You haven't even seen the beginning of this attitude. 702 00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:14,160 - Oh, I-I... - Wait, say that to me again. 703 00:24:14,162 --> 00:24:15,195 I apologize. 704 00:24:15,197 --> 00:24:16,596 That was a poor choice of words. 705 00:24:16,598 --> 00:24:19,132 I just mean I need you to show me the respect 706 00:24:19,134 --> 00:24:20,900 that you would show your boss. 707 00:24:20,902 --> 00:24:22,235 Because this is your house, right? 708 00:24:22,237 --> 00:24:23,869 Oh, you... you did the black voice thing with him? 709 00:24:23,871 --> 00:24:25,071 It's not a black voice. 710 00:24:25,073 --> 00:24:27,039 In actuality, not a black voice. 711 00:24:27,041 --> 00:24:28,475 No, you do a black voice. 712 00:24:28,477 --> 00:24:30,043 You don't remember when you was in that meeting, 713 00:24:30,045 --> 00:24:31,845 you was like, "We gonna get it lit up in here. 714 00:24:31,847 --> 00:24:32,846 This meeting lit!" 715 00:24:32,848 --> 00:24:33,947 It was very lit. 716 00:24:33,949 --> 00:24:35,215 CARRIE: You did it at the staff meeting 717 00:24:35,217 --> 00:24:37,517 when you were like, "I keep it one hundred." 718 00:24:37,519 --> 00:24:39,051 When have I never kept it one hunnid? 719 00:24:39,053 --> 00:24:42,155 When you added that AP Calculus to my class load. 720 00:24:42,157 --> 00:24:44,557 All right, agree to disagree. Listen, I hate to break up 721 00:24:44,559 --> 00:24:46,993 this pleasure party of delusion, 722 00:24:46,995 --> 00:24:48,361 but I have work to do. 723 00:24:48,363 --> 00:24:50,299 - Wow. - So, if you'll excuse me... 724 00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:54,067 I'm-a do my thang. 725 00:24:54,069 --> 00:24:55,902 (SCOFFS) 726 00:24:55,904 --> 00:24:58,371 That's... that's a black voice. 727 00:24:58,373 --> 00:25:00,373 - STEWART: Look alive, people! - (STUDENTS GASP) 728 00:25:00,375 --> 00:25:03,142 Let's move with purpose! Go, go, go, go, go! 729 00:25:03,144 --> 00:25:05,045 - Hey. Hey. - No loitering in my hall! 730 00:25:05,047 --> 00:25:07,614 Can... can he really do that? Can he keep me from going here? 731 00:25:07,616 --> 00:25:10,883 No, he can't. As a matter of fact, here's a textbook. 732 00:25:10,885 --> 00:25:12,951 I'm actually going to set up the class right now 733 00:25:12,953 --> 00:25:14,887 for our first session of the semester. 734 00:25:14,889 --> 00:25:16,255 We start at 7:00. 735 00:25:16,257 --> 00:25:18,291 Yeah, but this-this book is just kind of thick. 736 00:25:18,293 --> 00:25:21,096 (CHUCKLING): I thought it would be more like a leaflet. 737 00:25:22,297 --> 00:25:24,096 (SNIFFS) 738 00:25:24,098 --> 00:25:26,265 You thought you could cram four years of high school 739 00:25:26,267 --> 00:25:27,366 into a leaflet? 740 00:25:27,368 --> 00:25:28,534 - No. - Maybe you are 741 00:25:28,536 --> 00:25:30,904 - as dumb as Stewart says. - Wait, wait, no, no, no, no. 742 00:25:30,906 --> 00:25:32,038 No, no, I didn't... I didn't think that. 743 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:33,273 - Go to the library, then. - I just... 744 00:25:33,275 --> 00:25:34,474 - I'll hold on... - Little scrawny midget! 745 00:25:34,476 --> 00:25:36,141 I'll hold on to it. 746 00:25:36,143 --> 00:25:37,910 - Mm-hmm. - I'm trippin'. 747 00:25:37,912 --> 00:25:40,012 I'm thinking along the lines of traffic school. 748 00:25:40,014 --> 00:25:42,048 Look, come or not... makes me no difference. 749 00:25:42,050 --> 00:25:44,016 I don't get paid by the head. 750 00:25:44,018 --> 00:25:45,951 Or maybe you can find a night school 751 00:25:45,953 --> 00:25:47,587 that does teach from a leaflet. 752 00:25:47,589 --> 00:25:49,254 You-you know of one that...? 753 00:25:49,256 --> 00:25:50,624 No, no, no. I'm-I'm gonna keep it. 754 00:25:52,193 --> 00:25:53,460 Have a good one. 755 00:25:53,462 --> 00:25:56,496 TEDDY: Marv, I do not know about this GED thing. 756 00:25:56,498 --> 00:25:58,465 I don't, man. The teacher is tough as hell. 757 00:25:58,467 --> 00:26:00,232 Hold on. Marv, let me hit you back. 758 00:26:00,234 --> 00:26:01,233 Yo! 759 00:26:01,235 --> 00:26:02,501 Oh, shit! 760 00:26:02,503 --> 00:26:04,403 Hold up! Stop, stop! 761 00:26:04,405 --> 00:26:06,473 - What you doing? - What's it look like I'm doing? 762 00:26:06,475 --> 00:26:08,508 Uh, it look like you towing my car. 763 00:26:08,510 --> 00:26:10,075 Did I park in a handicap spot? 764 00:26:10,077 --> 00:26:11,644 You've missed the last four payments on that car. 765 00:26:11,646 --> 00:26:12,712 It's getting repossessed. 766 00:26:12,714 --> 00:26:14,680 You gonna take my car with my baby in the back? 767 00:26:14,682 --> 00:26:16,982 Don't see no goddamn baby in there. 768 00:26:16,984 --> 00:26:20,152 The baby right there. (IMITATES CRYING BABY) 769 00:26:20,154 --> 00:26:22,454 - You don't hear that? - I don't think so. 770 00:26:22,456 --> 00:26:24,425 Hey, man, I said don't do it. 771 00:26:25,459 --> 00:26:26,959 I'm not playing. 772 00:26:26,961 --> 00:26:28,060 Get out of the way, dude. 773 00:26:28,062 --> 00:26:29,562 Stop, man. 774 00:26:29,564 --> 00:26:30,697 I got my baby in here! 775 00:26:30,699 --> 00:26:32,465 - The car is leaving. - (STAMMERS) 776 00:26:32,467 --> 00:26:34,099 - Get out of the way, dude. - I'll show you leaving. 777 00:26:34,101 --> 00:26:35,567 - Come on, man. - I've got something for your ass. 778 00:26:35,569 --> 00:26:37,436 - (ENGINE STARTS, REVS) - Get out of the car. 779 00:26:37,438 --> 00:26:39,438 (TIRES SQUEALING) 780 00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,007 (YELLS) 781 00:26:42,009 --> 00:26:43,976 - You want to play that game? - Yeah! 782 00:26:43,978 --> 00:26:46,113 - You want to see something? - Come on, then! 783 00:26:47,715 --> 00:26:49,281 (SCREAMING) 784 00:26:49,283 --> 00:26:50,416 - Bye. - (SCREAMING CONTINUES) 785 00:26:50,418 --> 00:26:51,450 Dumb-ass. 786 00:26:51,452 --> 00:26:52,719 Oh, God! 787 00:26:52,721 --> 00:26:54,654 (STUDENTS GROANING AND GASPING) 788 00:26:54,656 --> 00:26:56,488 Glad y'all enjoyed the show. 789 00:26:56,490 --> 00:26:58,190 (TEDDY YELLS) 790 00:26:58,192 --> 00:27:01,160 TEDDY: Tell my fiancée I got in another accident! 791 00:27:01,162 --> 00:27:03,097 ♪ 792 00:27:07,401 --> 00:27:09,268 TEDDY: Uh... 793 00:27:09,270 --> 00:27:11,637 - Carrie, right? - Oh. 794 00:27:11,639 --> 00:27:13,305 So, even though we got textbook-sized textbooks, 795 00:27:13,307 --> 00:27:14,506 you decided to join us. 796 00:27:14,508 --> 00:27:17,042 - (CHUCKLES) - Well, grab a seat. 797 00:27:17,044 --> 00:27:18,545 We'll get started in a few. 798 00:27:18,547 --> 00:27:21,180 Uh, okay, before I do that... now, I know we got off 799 00:27:21,182 --> 00:27:23,182 on the wrong foot, so I was thinking. 800 00:27:23,184 --> 00:27:25,451 I don't know... I don't know if you had time for dinner or not, 801 00:27:25,453 --> 00:27:27,453 so I took it upon myself 802 00:27:27,455 --> 00:27:30,189 to go and get you one of my personal favorites. 803 00:27:30,191 --> 00:27:31,791 It's the best Mexican here in the A. 804 00:27:31,793 --> 00:27:33,392 Oh. Thank you. 805 00:27:33,394 --> 00:27:35,327 That is so thoughtful of you, Teddy. 806 00:27:35,329 --> 00:27:37,663 - (CHUCKLES) - So, check this out. 807 00:27:37,665 --> 00:27:39,398 I went through some of your old high school records. 808 00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:41,033 - Uh-huh. - Math, 809 00:27:41,035 --> 00:27:44,636 science, English... you was a horrible student. 810 00:27:44,638 --> 00:27:46,271 What was going on with you then? 811 00:27:46,273 --> 00:27:47,539 Was you being abused or something? 812 00:27:47,541 --> 00:27:49,140 (CHUCKLES) Carrie, the thing with me 813 00:27:49,142 --> 00:27:51,443 is I prefer to use the world as my classroom. 814 00:27:51,445 --> 00:27:54,646 And to be honest with you, I'm not a... 815 00:27:54,648 --> 00:27:57,182 I'm not like the rest of these folks. 816 00:27:57,184 --> 00:28:00,219 I'm just not what you would call a night school person. 817 00:28:00,221 --> 00:28:03,354 So I figure, maybe you and I can look out for one another. 818 00:28:03,356 --> 00:28:05,190 You help me, I help you. 819 00:28:05,192 --> 00:28:06,725 You got my back, I got your back. 820 00:28:06,727 --> 00:28:08,727 Whatever, but it's just a conversation. 821 00:28:08,729 --> 00:28:10,829 So enjoy your tacos. 822 00:28:10,831 --> 00:28:13,434 That smile can light up a room, can't it? (CHUCKLES) 823 00:28:17,571 --> 00:28:19,607 I ain't going there. 824 00:28:23,577 --> 00:28:25,646 (TEDDY HUMMING UNDER BREATH) 825 00:28:36,457 --> 00:28:39,158 MAN: Remember me, pendejo? 826 00:28:44,498 --> 00:28:47,098 Well, if it isn't Pubey McGee. 827 00:28:47,100 --> 00:28:49,601 The cheesecake puber is here, huh? 828 00:28:49,603 --> 00:28:51,202 Surprised to see me, bro? 829 00:28:51,204 --> 00:28:53,238 You shouldn't be, considering that you got me fired. 830 00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:56,174 - I did not get you fired. - Yes, you did. 831 00:28:56,176 --> 00:28:57,409 TEDDY: I worked in customer service 832 00:28:57,411 --> 00:28:58,844 for a long time. Everybody knows that 833 00:28:58,846 --> 00:29:00,879 - the customer is always right. - (CARRIE CLEARS THROAT) 834 00:29:00,881 --> 00:29:03,648 - Tips are my livelihood. - I had a 20 coming your way. 835 00:29:03,650 --> 00:29:05,350 LUIS: The bill was $800. 836 00:29:05,352 --> 00:29:07,819 I had a buck sixty coming to me, man. 837 00:29:07,821 --> 00:29:09,688 - Okay. That's your fault. - CARRIE: Okay, let's begin. 838 00:29:09,690 --> 00:29:11,723 Who here likes tacos? 839 00:29:11,725 --> 00:29:13,892 - MAN: Oh! Oh, oh. - Ooh! 840 00:29:13,894 --> 00:29:16,294 - (CHUCKLING) - They vegetarian? 841 00:29:16,296 --> 00:29:18,530 'Cause I don't eat meat unless it's barbecue. 842 00:29:18,532 --> 00:29:20,197 Let's see what Teddy brought us. 843 00:29:20,199 --> 00:29:22,400 Uh, we got carne asada. 844 00:29:22,402 --> 00:29:23,635 - There you go. - (CHUCKLES) 845 00:29:23,637 --> 00:29:25,169 There's, uh, al pastor. 846 00:29:25,171 --> 00:29:26,504 - Oh, thanks. - You... you like that? Um... 847 00:29:26,506 --> 00:29:27,705 Carnitas? You like carnitas? 848 00:29:27,707 --> 00:29:29,141 - There you go, girl. - WOMAN: Ooh! 849 00:29:29,143 --> 00:29:30,742 - Uh... uh, excuse me. - Hey! 850 00:29:30,744 --> 00:29:33,779 Carrie, I-I had actually got those tacos for you to eat. 851 00:29:33,781 --> 00:29:35,179 I know. 852 00:29:35,181 --> 00:29:37,348 See, class, Teddy went to... 853 00:29:37,350 --> 00:29:40,184 Cactus House to try to win me over. 854 00:29:40,186 --> 00:29:41,453 But here's the deal, Teddy. 855 00:29:41,455 --> 00:29:43,321 If you're trying to kiss my ass, 856 00:29:43,323 --> 00:29:45,323 you're gonna have to come a little bit better than that. 857 00:29:45,325 --> 00:29:46,925 I'm talking, like, steamed lobster 858 00:29:46,927 --> 00:29:48,894 inside a macaroni and cheese, 859 00:29:48,896 --> 00:29:50,595 with a side of broccolini. 860 00:29:50,597 --> 00:29:52,664 You know what I'm saying? Something fancy. 861 00:29:52,666 --> 00:29:54,666 Not no fast food place where I could 862 00:29:54,668 --> 00:29:56,802 go buy this with my own little raggedy paycheck. 863 00:29:56,804 --> 00:29:58,737 Well, there's actually a... 864 00:29:58,739 --> 00:30:00,771 there's actually a special guacamole... 865 00:30:00,773 --> 00:30:04,543 If you want to succeed in my class, 866 00:30:04,545 --> 00:30:05,811 you need to do the work. 867 00:30:05,813 --> 00:30:07,178 It's just that simple. 868 00:30:07,180 --> 00:30:08,512 - Yes? - Uh, quick question. 869 00:30:08,514 --> 00:30:11,349 Uh, so "yes" on the steamed lobster? 870 00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:13,317 No, sir. 871 00:30:13,319 --> 00:30:15,853 That's what I like to call "a teachable moment." 872 00:30:15,855 --> 00:30:18,557 Okay, so no lobster. 873 00:30:18,559 --> 00:30:21,659 Um, all right, let's go ahead and do some introductions. 874 00:30:21,661 --> 00:30:22,793 I'll start. 875 00:30:22,795 --> 00:30:24,195 My name is Carrie. 876 00:30:24,197 --> 00:30:25,630 During the day, I teach 877 00:30:25,632 --> 00:30:27,632 way too many classes for way too little money. 878 00:30:27,634 --> 00:30:30,468 So I'm here to try to make a little extra cash 879 00:30:30,470 --> 00:30:34,872 so I can afford such luxuries as rent and antibiotics. 880 00:30:34,874 --> 00:30:38,242 'Cause this job makes me sick sometimes. 881 00:30:38,244 --> 00:30:40,343 (CHUCKLES) Uh, you're next. 882 00:30:40,345 --> 00:30:42,246 Yes, you. 883 00:30:42,248 --> 00:30:44,248 As-salaam alaikum. 884 00:30:44,250 --> 00:30:45,683 What up, though? 885 00:30:45,685 --> 00:30:47,551 Jaylen's the name. 886 00:30:47,553 --> 00:30:49,587 I've been working for the last 14 years 887 00:30:49,589 --> 00:30:50,955 at the MacArthur Bottling Plant 888 00:30:50,957 --> 00:30:52,660 and just got replaced by a robot. 889 00:30:53,994 --> 00:30:55,861 And my rib, my Cleopatra, 890 00:30:55,863 --> 00:30:57,762 my queen, my bottom bitch, 891 00:30:57,764 --> 00:31:00,498 my wife of 14 years, she was like, "Yo, 892 00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:02,967 "if you want options, you gonna have to get your GED. 893 00:31:02,969 --> 00:31:04,803 "It's either that or end up cleaning rooms 894 00:31:04,805 --> 00:31:07,605 at the Best Western for half your salary." 895 00:31:07,607 --> 00:31:09,640 And if you know Jay, that ain't gonna work. 896 00:31:09,642 --> 00:31:12,643 Hey, let me... let me just say this, 897 00:31:12,645 --> 00:31:14,979 okay, while I got the platform. 898 00:31:14,981 --> 00:31:18,616 For me, I first got woke when I seen Terminator, 899 00:31:18,618 --> 00:31:22,386 and I realized it wasn't just a movie; 900 00:31:22,388 --> 00:31:23,788 it was prophecy. 901 00:31:23,790 --> 00:31:26,524 First identified by the 3.5-Percenters, 902 00:31:26,526 --> 00:31:27,792 but that's another conversation. 903 00:31:27,794 --> 00:31:29,627 Let's just put it like this. 904 00:31:29,629 --> 00:31:31,829 The revolution will not be roboticized. 905 00:31:31,831 --> 00:31:33,431 Mm-hmm. 906 00:31:33,433 --> 00:31:34,865 Not on Jay's watch. 907 00:31:34,867 --> 00:31:36,567 Huh? 908 00:31:36,569 --> 00:31:38,568 Real nigga shit. 909 00:31:38,570 --> 00:31:39,770 - Huh? - CARRIE: Thank you, Jaylen. 910 00:31:39,772 --> 00:31:41,372 I'll make sure I don't bring my Roomba 911 00:31:41,374 --> 00:31:42,473 to the next class. 912 00:31:42,475 --> 00:31:44,909 My wife takes rumba classes. 913 00:31:44,911 --> 00:31:46,811 - I don't get it. - CARRIE: Let's keep it moving. 914 00:31:46,813 --> 00:31:48,411 Uh, how about you, ma'am? 915 00:31:48,413 --> 00:31:49,914 - Yeah. - Oh. 916 00:31:49,916 --> 00:31:51,514 Okay. Hi, gang. 917 00:31:51,516 --> 00:31:52,783 My name is Theresa, 918 00:31:52,785 --> 00:31:54,618 and I dropped out of high school 919 00:31:54,620 --> 00:31:56,654 when I was pregnant with my first child. 920 00:31:56,656 --> 00:31:58,489 My now-husband, Randy, 921 00:31:58,491 --> 00:32:00,423 well, we got married after he knocked me up. 922 00:32:00,425 --> 00:32:01,859 Then we had two more kids, so we have 923 00:32:01,861 --> 00:32:03,626 three little rascals now, and it's fun. 924 00:32:03,628 --> 00:32:05,362 - (IMITATES GUNSHOT) - We're just a little underwater 925 00:32:05,364 --> 00:32:07,765 right now, so I wanted to get my GED and hopefully 926 00:32:07,767 --> 00:32:10,300 enter the workforce before it's too late 927 00:32:10,302 --> 00:32:12,672 and we have to live in Randy's parents' laundry room. 928 00:32:18,544 --> 00:32:20,377 I'm blessed. 929 00:32:20,379 --> 00:32:21,812 So blessed. 930 00:32:21,814 --> 00:32:23,513 God is good. 931 00:32:23,515 --> 00:32:25,548 That's what's up. 932 00:32:25,550 --> 00:32:26,951 CARRIE: Uh, how about you, young lady? 933 00:32:26,953 --> 00:32:28,586 Oh. 934 00:32:28,588 --> 00:32:30,855 Hey, uh, what's up? I'm Mila. 935 00:32:30,857 --> 00:32:32,690 I got kicked out of my high school 936 00:32:32,692 --> 00:32:34,324 because they found some Molly in my locker. 937 00:32:34,326 --> 00:32:35,760 - Mm-hmm. - And I can avoid juvie 938 00:32:35,762 --> 00:32:38,428 if I get my GED, so here I am. 939 00:32:38,430 --> 00:32:40,664 - I'm so psyched. - Cool. 940 00:32:40,666 --> 00:32:43,801 Look at you, all cute, making America great again. 941 00:32:43,803 --> 00:32:46,402 - Bitch. - (SCOFFS) 942 00:32:46,404 --> 00:32:47,872 So, what's your story, guy? 943 00:32:47,874 --> 00:32:50,107 Um, my name is Luis Flores. 944 00:32:50,109 --> 00:32:52,375 I had a great job as a waiter. 945 00:32:52,377 --> 00:32:54,345 Lot of money in tips. 946 00:32:54,347 --> 00:32:56,981 Until I was fired without cause. 947 00:32:56,983 --> 00:32:58,716 No reason at all. 948 00:32:58,718 --> 00:33:00,285 (WHISPERS): Fired. 949 00:33:01,653 --> 00:33:03,453 I don't know why... I have no idea 950 00:33:03,455 --> 00:33:04,889 why he's looking at me. I don't... 951 00:33:04,891 --> 00:33:06,423 It's fine. 952 00:33:06,425 --> 00:33:07,792 It's just a sign that it's time 953 00:33:07,794 --> 00:33:09,126 for me to do something different. 954 00:33:09,128 --> 00:33:10,760 You see, I came to this country 955 00:33:10,762 --> 00:33:12,562 from Mexico to fulfill my dream 956 00:33:12,564 --> 00:33:13,797 of being a singer/songwriter. 957 00:33:13,799 --> 00:33:15,532 Oh, like Julio Iglesias? 958 00:33:15,534 --> 00:33:18,035 No, not like Julio Iglesias. 959 00:33:18,037 --> 00:33:19,737 He sucks. 960 00:33:19,739 --> 00:33:22,039 More like Justin Bieber 961 00:33:22,041 --> 00:33:25,608 or Justin Timberlake or T-Pain. 962 00:33:25,610 --> 00:33:28,813 (LAUGHS) Wait, wait, wait, wait. 963 00:33:28,815 --> 00:33:31,816 Aren't you a little old to, like, be a pop star now? 964 00:33:31,818 --> 00:33:33,451 Aren't you a little young to die? 965 00:33:35,121 --> 00:33:37,154 That's what's up. 966 00:33:37,156 --> 00:33:40,991 But now I'm going to become a dental "hy-enist." 967 00:33:40,993 --> 00:33:43,894 'Cause I have great teeth. 968 00:33:43,896 --> 00:33:45,895 So I think I'd be a natural. 969 00:33:45,897 --> 00:33:47,564 A what? 970 00:33:47,566 --> 00:33:49,467 Dental hy-enist. 971 00:33:50,702 --> 00:33:52,101 Maybe you should see one. 972 00:33:52,103 --> 00:33:55,638 'Cause, you know what, pretty stinky, guys. 973 00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:56,974 MAN: All right. Hey, everybody. 974 00:33:56,976 --> 00:33:58,175 I'm Mackenzie. 975 00:33:58,177 --> 00:33:59,809 Uh, they call me Big Mac. 976 00:33:59,811 --> 00:34:01,678 Oh, we love McDonald's. 977 00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:02,946 What? 978 00:34:02,948 --> 00:34:05,049 McDonald's? 979 00:34:05,051 --> 00:34:06,683 I'm sorry, what? 980 00:34:06,685 --> 00:34:08,620 From the burger joint, Mickey D's. 981 00:34:09,888 --> 00:34:11,423 Ronald McDonald's. 982 00:34:12,691 --> 00:34:13,923 "Two all-beef patties, 983 00:34:13,925 --> 00:34:15,524 "special sauce, lettuce, cheese, 984 00:34:15,526 --> 00:34:17,761 - on a sesame-seed bun." - Hmm. 985 00:34:17,763 --> 00:34:19,629 Never heard of it? 986 00:34:19,631 --> 00:34:22,565 (WHIMPERS, GROANS) 987 00:34:22,567 --> 00:34:25,869 Ooh, it's gonna be a long semester. 988 00:34:25,871 --> 00:34:28,171 - Go on. - MACKENZIE: Well, anyway, 989 00:34:28,173 --> 00:34:32,508 uh, my knees and my back are really jacked up 990 00:34:32,510 --> 00:34:35,011 from working at He-Man Movers for 30 years, 991 00:34:35,013 --> 00:34:38,815 so I decided to get my GED so that I could move up 992 00:34:38,817 --> 00:34:41,218 to a management position, get off the truck. 993 00:34:41,220 --> 00:34:43,820 And my son... we call him Little Mac... 994 00:34:43,822 --> 00:34:45,822 he has decided to drop out of school. 995 00:34:45,824 --> 00:34:48,625 So I made a deal with him: I get my GED, 996 00:34:48,627 --> 00:34:50,193 he gets his diploma. 997 00:34:50,195 --> 00:34:51,593 (CHUCKLES) 998 00:34:51,595 --> 00:34:53,630 Little reverse psychology. 999 00:34:53,632 --> 00:34:55,031 All right. 1000 00:34:55,033 --> 00:34:56,566 And what's your name? 1001 00:34:56,568 --> 00:34:58,234 Hey, yo, what up? I'm Bobby. 1002 00:34:58,236 --> 00:35:00,069 That's what... that's what I'm talking about. 1003 00:35:00,071 --> 00:35:02,906 That's Illuminati. That's what I'm saying. 1004 00:35:02,908 --> 00:35:04,807 See, the nigga here, but he ain't here. 1005 00:35:04,809 --> 00:35:06,643 It's like they watching you, 1006 00:35:06,645 --> 00:35:08,245 and you think you watching them. 1007 00:35:08,247 --> 00:35:09,479 That's what they do. 1008 00:35:09,481 --> 00:35:11,014 So you got Bobby Digital. 1009 00:35:11,016 --> 00:35:12,849 He here, but he not. 1010 00:35:12,851 --> 00:35:14,217 That's Tupac Coachella. 1011 00:35:14,219 --> 00:35:15,251 (CHUCKLING): You know what I'm saying? 1012 00:35:15,253 --> 00:35:17,121 And he in the... You see? 1013 00:35:17,123 --> 00:35:19,223 - Y'all don't...? - All right, um... 1014 00:35:19,225 --> 00:35:21,591 That probably ain't even a real nigga. Hey. 1015 00:35:21,593 --> 00:35:23,793 Are you on crack? It's-it's Skype. 1016 00:35:23,795 --> 00:35:26,595 (SIGHS) Whew, boy, it's hard to be woke. 1017 00:35:26,597 --> 00:35:27,729 (CHUCKLES) 1018 00:35:27,731 --> 00:35:29,168 It's hard to be woke. 1019 00:35:30,502 --> 00:35:32,769 What is "woke"? 1020 00:35:32,771 --> 00:35:35,672 Okay, well, welcome, everyone. 1021 00:35:35,674 --> 00:35:36,773 Really nice. We've all met. 1022 00:35:36,775 --> 00:35:38,207 Well, we didn't, uh... 1023 00:35:38,209 --> 00:35:40,109 we didn't meet... we didn't meet everyone. 1024 00:35:40,111 --> 00:35:42,211 - I didn't, uh... - Teddy, uh, earlier, 1025 00:35:42,213 --> 00:35:44,047 you said, unlike these folks, 1026 00:35:44,049 --> 00:35:46,548 you're not a night school type of person, 1027 00:35:46,550 --> 00:35:49,551 so I didn't think you cared. 1028 00:35:49,553 --> 00:35:51,187 JAYLEN: Is that right? 1029 00:35:51,189 --> 00:35:53,122 TEDDY: Well, you didn't... 1030 00:35:53,124 --> 00:35:55,291 you didn't hear it right, 'cause I would never say that 1031 00:35:55,293 --> 00:35:57,260 about people that I don't know. 1032 00:35:57,262 --> 00:35:59,162 You know what? This is a perfect segue. 1033 00:35:59,164 --> 00:36:01,530 I'll just follow your lead, and I'll stand up. 1034 00:36:01,532 --> 00:36:03,031 I am Teddy Walker. 1035 00:36:03,033 --> 00:36:06,002 Uh, a little fun fact about me: I actually went here. 1036 00:36:06,004 --> 00:36:08,738 - Oh. - I'm also newly engaged. 1037 00:36:08,740 --> 00:36:10,605 His fiancée is out of his league. 1038 00:36:10,607 --> 00:36:11,740 I'm sorry, what? 1039 00:36:11,742 --> 00:36:12,841 Nothing. You're doing great. 1040 00:36:12,843 --> 00:36:14,110 I said, "Keep going. 1041 00:36:14,112 --> 00:36:15,811 Everybody loves you." 1042 00:36:15,813 --> 00:36:17,613 CARRIE: How does your fiancée feel about 1043 00:36:17,615 --> 00:36:18,614 you being in night school? 1044 00:36:18,616 --> 00:36:19,782 (HIGH-PITCHED): Oh, she good. 1045 00:36:19,784 --> 00:36:21,918 She loves it. 1046 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:23,919 (CHUCKLES) He ain't told her shit. 1047 00:36:23,921 --> 00:36:25,121 TEDDY: She loves it. 1048 00:36:25,123 --> 00:36:26,655 I noticed that your voice 1049 00:36:26,657 --> 00:36:28,156 just went up a whole octave. 1050 00:36:28,158 --> 00:36:31,626 Now, from my studies of psychology in grad school, 1051 00:36:31,628 --> 00:36:34,563 I know that that means that you're bullshitting. 1052 00:36:34,565 --> 00:36:35,931 Ain't no bullshit in me. 1053 00:36:35,933 --> 00:36:37,899 I tell you what... if you're lying with her, 1054 00:36:37,901 --> 00:36:40,068 - don't lie to her. - But I don't... I don't lie. 1055 00:36:40,070 --> 00:36:41,738 Sound like some bullshit to me. 1056 00:36:41,740 --> 00:36:43,006 Everyone sees right through you. 1057 00:36:43,008 --> 00:36:44,573 - Okay, how about we...? - Mm-hmm. 1058 00:36:44,575 --> 00:36:46,641 If we go by your theory about the voice thing... 1059 00:36:46,643 --> 00:36:47,976 I think that we're... I think that we're all 1060 00:36:47,978 --> 00:36:49,278 - getting off track. - ...he's lied four times. 1061 00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:51,079 This boy definitely lying. 1062 00:36:51,081 --> 00:36:53,116 - I am not. - You can't outsmart Mother Nature. 1063 00:36:53,118 --> 00:36:54,350 And that's what... that-that's what a woman is. 1064 00:36:54,352 --> 00:36:56,685 - Brother. - Especially a black woman. 1065 00:36:56,687 --> 00:36:57,987 - You know, how... - That's correct. 1066 00:36:57,989 --> 00:36:59,921 - Girls are smart, dude. - Goddamn it. 1067 00:36:59,923 --> 00:37:00,756 - Like, literally, damn it. - (OTHERS MURMURING) 1068 00:37:00,758 --> 00:37:02,624 Even if he didn't tell her, so what? 1069 00:37:02,626 --> 00:37:03,692 - Okay, here's the thing. - I told Randy 1070 00:37:03,694 --> 00:37:05,762 that he was the first guy I slept with... not true. 1071 00:37:05,764 --> 00:37:07,330 Hey, I'm trying to introduce myself, and I can't... 1072 00:37:07,332 --> 00:37:09,198 You don't respect your queen, 'cause if you did, 1073 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:10,866 - that bitch would know where you at. - Okay. 1074 00:37:10,868 --> 00:37:12,268 Teddy. 1075 00:37:12,270 --> 00:37:13,235 Don't lie to your queen. 1076 00:37:13,237 --> 00:37:14,369 - Okay, guys. - JAYLEN: If you're busting off 1077 00:37:14,371 --> 00:37:17,140 in her guts like that, she might be carrying your seed. 1078 00:37:17,142 --> 00:37:18,274 I feel like this conversation... 1079 00:37:18,276 --> 00:37:19,841 So you ain't just lying to her; you lying to your child. 1080 00:37:19,843 --> 00:37:21,044 - Shit! - If it's your bottom bitch, 1081 00:37:21,046 --> 00:37:22,044 she know you stupid, fam. 1082 00:37:22,046 --> 00:37:24,046 - All I'm saying, fam, look-look... - Forget it. 1083 00:37:24,048 --> 00:37:26,114 - Okay. - How your fiancée don't know where you at? 1084 00:37:26,116 --> 00:37:27,682 It's after dark. (CHUCKLES) 1085 00:37:27,684 --> 00:37:28,851 This ain't Halloween, fam. 1086 00:37:28,853 --> 00:37:29,986 I'm done. 1087 00:37:29,988 --> 00:37:32,221 My sister know where I'm at, okay? 1088 00:37:32,223 --> 00:37:34,623 And she live all the way in Arkansas. 1089 00:37:34,625 --> 00:37:36,825 Okay. Here's the deal, class. 1090 00:37:36,827 --> 00:37:39,728 You will be given homework every night 1091 00:37:39,730 --> 00:37:41,197 just like regular high school. 1092 00:37:41,199 --> 00:37:42,764 - (GROANS) - And now... 1093 00:37:42,766 --> 00:37:44,267 a pop quiz 1094 00:37:44,269 --> 00:37:47,936 just so I can get a better idea of where you all are. 1095 00:37:47,938 --> 00:37:50,005 Wait, wait. We got a... we got a test on the first day? 1096 00:37:50,007 --> 00:37:53,109 Teddy, it's a pop quiz, okay? 1097 00:37:53,111 --> 00:37:54,410 Look here, folks. 1098 00:37:54,412 --> 00:37:57,879 I am here to teach if you're here to learn. 1099 00:37:57,881 --> 00:38:01,416 Otherwise, you can get out of my class right now. 1100 00:38:01,418 --> 00:38:03,285 That's what's up. 1101 00:38:03,287 --> 00:38:05,589 Welcome to night school. 1102 00:38:08,259 --> 00:38:10,659 There you go. 1103 00:38:10,661 --> 00:38:12,427 It was terrible, man. Terrible! 1104 00:38:12,429 --> 00:38:13,929 Like, she's not like the teachers 1105 00:38:13,931 --> 00:38:15,330 that we had back in the day. 1106 00:38:15,332 --> 00:38:17,400 - What? - This woman is a brick wall, 1107 00:38:17,402 --> 00:38:18,967 and I can't... I can't work her. 1108 00:38:18,969 --> 00:38:21,236 I can't work a brick wall. 1109 00:38:21,238 --> 00:38:22,204 What are you... what are you doing? 1110 00:38:22,206 --> 00:38:24,272 I'm working out. I'm trying to shed some LBs. 1111 00:38:24,274 --> 00:38:26,674 - I want to feel fit. - Uh, why am I even asking? 1112 00:38:26,676 --> 00:38:28,977 In the meantime, please stop paying for everything, 1113 00:38:28,979 --> 00:38:31,447 and you have to get a temp job. 1114 00:38:31,449 --> 00:38:33,849 - You don't think I've been looking for a job? - (WHIMPERS) 1115 00:38:33,851 --> 00:38:36,184 What are you, crazy? I'm on a treadmill. 1116 00:38:36,186 --> 00:38:38,286 The jobs that I want, they are not 1117 00:38:38,288 --> 00:38:40,755 going to give to a high school dropout. 1118 00:38:40,757 --> 00:38:42,358 Well, you can't keep lying to Lisa. 1119 00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:43,559 Okay? You know what, I'm gonna go 1120 00:38:43,561 --> 00:38:45,827 on Monster.com right now, see if anything new popped up. 1121 00:38:45,829 --> 00:38:48,063 What are you going... what are you going to find 1122 00:38:48,065 --> 00:38:49,364 - on Monster.com? - Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. 1123 00:38:49,366 --> 00:38:50,965 Okay, here we go. "Sales associate wanted. 1124 00:38:50,967 --> 00:38:52,968 Marketing skills a must." 1125 00:38:52,970 --> 00:38:54,903 And... wait for it. 1126 00:38:54,905 --> 00:38:57,139 "No GED required." (LAUGHS) 1127 00:38:57,141 --> 00:38:59,241 You gotta jump on this, man. This is perfect. 1128 00:38:59,243 --> 00:39:00,908 (PASSING VEHICLE HONKING HORN) 1129 00:39:00,910 --> 00:39:02,845 ♪ 1130 00:39:05,416 --> 00:39:07,351 (HORN HONKING) 1131 00:39:14,458 --> 00:39:16,994 It's chicken from the Lord. 1132 00:39:18,095 --> 00:39:19,861 So he... so he made it? 1133 00:39:19,863 --> 00:39:21,331 Yes, sir, he did. 1134 00:39:22,499 --> 00:39:24,132 Yeah. 1135 00:39:24,134 --> 00:39:26,033 I-I can... I can work with this. 1136 00:39:26,035 --> 00:39:28,136 - You can? - Yeah. 1137 00:39:28,138 --> 00:39:30,038 Basically, what you want to do... 1138 00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:33,108 you want to... you want to uplift your customers' palate. 1139 00:39:33,110 --> 00:39:34,742 - Yes, sir. - When they bite 1140 00:39:34,744 --> 00:39:36,877 into your food, you want their taste buds 1141 00:39:36,879 --> 00:39:38,946 to scream out, "Hallelujah!" 1142 00:39:38,948 --> 00:39:40,115 Preach it, Brother Teddy. 1143 00:39:40,117 --> 00:39:41,449 You are a godsend. 1144 00:39:41,451 --> 00:39:43,018 I'm a salesman, man. 1145 00:39:43,020 --> 00:39:44,386 That's what I do, okay? 1146 00:39:44,388 --> 00:39:46,787 Now, when it comes to titles, I don't even care. 1147 00:39:46,789 --> 00:39:48,390 "Marketing director"... that's up to you. 1148 00:39:48,392 --> 00:39:51,091 "WWJD," at this point. "What would Jesus do?" 1149 00:39:51,093 --> 00:39:52,394 - Yes, sir. - The one thing that I ask 1150 00:39:52,396 --> 00:39:53,929 is for you to be flexible with the hours, 1151 00:39:53,931 --> 00:39:55,363 'cause I'm getting my GED. 1152 00:39:55,365 --> 00:39:57,165 You are bettering yourself, Brother Teddy. 1153 00:39:57,167 --> 00:39:59,334 - Yeah. - That's what being a Christian is all about. 1154 00:39:59,336 --> 00:40:01,135 Yeah, amen to that. 1155 00:40:01,137 --> 00:40:02,136 (CHUCKLING): Amen. 1156 00:40:02,138 --> 00:40:03,706 - Yeah. - Glory be. 1157 00:40:04,875 --> 00:40:06,243 This should fit you perfectly. 1158 00:40:07,544 --> 00:40:08,543 Brother Teddy, 1159 00:40:08,545 --> 00:40:10,445 I have been waiting on the Lord 1160 00:40:10,447 --> 00:40:12,347 to bring me a pint-sized little man like you 1161 00:40:12,349 --> 00:40:15,818 to fill this out, and here you are. 1162 00:40:17,187 --> 00:40:19,020 I'm-I'm not gonna do that. 1163 00:40:19,022 --> 00:40:22,089 Brother Isaac, I-I'm a black man. 1164 00:40:22,091 --> 00:40:25,392 I can't put on a chicken suit in 2018 1165 00:40:25,394 --> 00:40:27,928 and stand on the side of a highway 1166 00:40:27,930 --> 00:40:30,098 and hawk no goddamn chicken. 1167 00:40:30,100 --> 00:40:31,566 Now, if the marketing position isn't what you 1168 00:40:31,568 --> 00:40:32,933 had in mind, we can figure... 1169 00:40:32,935 --> 00:40:34,068 - (ORGAN PLAYING) - What is going on? 1170 00:40:34,070 --> 00:40:36,203 You know what? We're gonna have to put a pin in that. 1171 00:40:36,205 --> 00:40:37,938 - Is that a fire drill? - All right, everybody. 1172 00:40:37,940 --> 00:40:39,473 Let's gather round. The hour is upon us. 1173 00:40:39,475 --> 00:40:40,976 Where's the closest exit? 1174 00:40:40,978 --> 00:40:43,044 - It is time to pray. - It's time to what? 1175 00:40:43,046 --> 00:40:45,045 It's time to pray. Gather round. 1176 00:40:45,047 --> 00:40:46,914 Goddamn. What is your deal? 1177 00:40:46,916 --> 00:40:49,216 - What's...? Hey, lady. - Dear Lord: We thank you 1178 00:40:49,218 --> 00:40:50,484 for bringing little Teddy to us 1179 00:40:50,486 --> 00:40:51,819 - here this morning. - MAN: Yes, sir. 1180 00:40:51,821 --> 00:40:53,021 This little chickadee... 1181 00:40:53,023 --> 00:40:54,222 - Huh? - ...is gonna share the word 1182 00:40:54,224 --> 00:40:55,956 about your precious poultry with the world. 1183 00:40:55,958 --> 00:40:57,891 What I'm not gonna do is do it in... 1184 00:40:57,893 --> 00:40:59,260 Ma'am, ma'am. 1185 00:40:59,262 --> 00:41:01,295 Strong hands! 1186 00:41:01,297 --> 00:41:03,097 Excuse me! 1187 00:41:03,099 --> 00:41:06,000 What I'm not gonna do is do it in the chick... Goddamn. 1188 00:41:06,002 --> 00:41:07,101 Brother Teddy... 1189 00:41:07,103 --> 00:41:08,370 - He's in you. - (GRUNTING QUIETLY) 1190 00:41:08,372 --> 00:41:09,471 He's in you, ain't he? 1191 00:41:09,473 --> 00:41:10,871 Chicken suit or not, 1192 00:41:10,873 --> 00:41:12,506 we are all praying together right now 1193 00:41:12,508 --> 00:41:14,842 that you're gonna find your nest here with us today. 1194 00:41:14,844 --> 00:41:16,910 - Okay. - Amen and amen. 1195 00:41:16,912 --> 00:41:19,179 - GROUP: Amen! - (MURMURING) 1196 00:41:19,181 --> 00:41:20,114 MAN: Amen. Yes, sir! 1197 00:41:20,116 --> 00:41:21,148 - Welcome, Brother Teddy. - (TEDDY MUTTERING) 1198 00:41:21,150 --> 00:41:23,183 ISAAC: All right, everybody, this is a big day. 1199 00:41:23,185 --> 00:41:25,152 Hey, brother, let me holler at you real quick. 1200 00:41:25,154 --> 00:41:26,453 Are y'all in the Sunken Place? 1201 00:41:26,455 --> 00:41:28,189 Let's share Jesus through our food. Let's go. 1202 00:41:28,191 --> 00:41:29,591 The lunch rush is upon us. 1203 00:41:29,593 --> 00:41:30,991 What... lunch rush? 1204 00:41:30,993 --> 00:41:32,092 It's 10:00 a.m. 1205 00:41:32,094 --> 00:41:33,460 I don't understand 1206 00:41:33,462 --> 00:41:34,962 how that could be considered a lunch rush. 1207 00:41:34,964 --> 00:41:36,597 Trust me, Brother Teddy. 1208 00:41:36,599 --> 00:41:39,333 Okay, if there... if-if there's any way that I can just talk 1209 00:41:39,335 --> 00:41:41,336 - to you about the... - Good morning, ladies. 1210 00:41:41,338 --> 00:41:42,537 Hello, Cinnamon. 1211 00:41:42,539 --> 00:41:43,538 Roxy. 1212 00:41:43,540 --> 00:41:44,972 Hello, ladies. 1213 00:41:44,974 --> 00:41:46,307 Tootie, how was the shift? 1214 00:41:46,309 --> 00:41:47,875 Hollywood, how you doing? 1215 00:41:47,877 --> 00:41:49,443 Good to see you, Leigh. 1216 00:41:49,445 --> 00:41:51,111 Hello, Veronica, how was your shift? 1217 00:41:51,113 --> 00:41:53,881 Roxy, good to see you. 1218 00:41:53,883 --> 00:41:55,818 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 1219 00:42:02,558 --> 00:42:04,592 CARRIE: Now, from your first night of homework, 1220 00:42:04,594 --> 00:42:09,063 you all should be very familiar with the Pythagorean theorem. 1221 00:42:09,065 --> 00:42:10,297 All right? Say it with me. 1222 00:42:10,299 --> 00:42:11,532 "Pythagorean..." 1223 00:42:11,534 --> 00:42:12,566 GROUP: "Pythagorean." 1224 00:42:12,568 --> 00:42:13,567 "Pathygorinean." 1225 00:42:13,569 --> 00:42:14,967 - "Theorem." - GROUP: "Theorem." 1226 00:42:14,969 --> 00:42:16,103 - "Theorem." - That's how you say it. 1227 00:42:16,105 --> 00:42:17,505 That's what it is. 1228 00:42:17,507 --> 00:42:19,973 Hey, yo, Bobby, watch out, fam! 1229 00:42:19,975 --> 00:42:22,009 - My God. - Oh! 1230 00:42:22,011 --> 00:42:23,243 - BOBBY: What?! - Ooh. 1231 00:42:23,245 --> 00:42:25,145 - (GRUNTING AND GROANING) - Oh! 1232 00:42:25,147 --> 00:42:27,981 - (SHOUTING AND HOLLERING) - MILA: Shit. 1233 00:42:27,983 --> 00:42:30,084 BOBBY: Can't you see I'm trying to learn? 1234 00:42:30,086 --> 00:42:31,653 Someone ought to call the cops. 1235 00:42:31,655 --> 00:42:33,987 - What's happening? - BOBBY: Take that! 1236 00:42:33,989 --> 00:42:35,489 - (ALARM BLARING) - (YELLING) 1237 00:42:35,491 --> 00:42:37,224 - Ooh! - Jesus. 1238 00:42:37,226 --> 00:42:38,925 BOBBY: Get off me! Get off me! 1239 00:42:38,927 --> 00:42:40,361 He's getting up, he's getting up, he's getting up. 1240 00:42:40,363 --> 00:42:41,563 Watch out, fam! Behind you, nigga! 1241 00:42:41,565 --> 00:42:43,430 - Oh, my God. - Oh! 1242 00:42:43,432 --> 00:42:44,998 Oh, he just kicked him in the... 1243 00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:46,266 - Oh, my God! - Oh! 1244 00:42:46,268 --> 00:42:49,168 - (LAUGHING) - (GRUNTING AND GROANING) 1245 00:42:49,170 --> 00:42:50,571 - Oh! Enough! - BOBBY: Yeah! Yeah! 1246 00:42:50,573 --> 00:42:52,039 Finish him! Step on his head! 1247 00:42:52,041 --> 00:42:53,207 (MAN SCREAMING) 1248 00:42:53,209 --> 00:42:54,641 - Come here. Break it up. - Come on! 1249 00:42:54,643 --> 00:42:56,643 - Up! - (GRUNTING AND GROANING) 1250 00:42:56,645 --> 00:42:58,412 - Hey, come on! - Oh, hey, man! 1251 00:42:58,414 --> 00:42:59,513 I didn't do shit. 1252 00:42:59,515 --> 00:43:01,615 That's the stuff right there. 1253 00:43:01,617 --> 00:43:03,383 Reminds me of the old days. 1254 00:43:03,385 --> 00:43:06,086 - (BOBBY SIGHS) - (ALARM CONTINUES BLARING) 1255 00:43:06,088 --> 00:43:08,455 They had the wrong guy. 1256 00:43:08,457 --> 00:43:10,224 - Please continue. - You sure you cool, 1257 00:43:10,226 --> 00:43:11,658 or do we need to just chill 1258 00:43:11,660 --> 00:43:13,627 and wait for you to make a new shank? 1259 00:43:13,629 --> 00:43:17,030 Please continue with the Pythagorean... 1260 00:43:17,032 --> 00:43:18,599 "theory-em." 1261 00:43:18,601 --> 00:43:21,068 O-Okay. 1262 00:43:21,070 --> 00:43:22,736 You know what we ought to do for Bobby? 1263 00:43:22,738 --> 00:43:25,204 We should get him, like, some smokes, 1264 00:43:25,206 --> 00:43:26,740 'cause that stuff is like currency in prison. 1265 00:43:26,742 --> 00:43:28,108 That and ass. 1266 00:43:28,110 --> 00:43:29,443 CARRIE: Okay, here we go. 1267 00:43:29,445 --> 00:43:32,045 So, this is what we call a right triangle. 1268 00:43:32,047 --> 00:43:35,549 And we already know the value of two sides of the triangle. 1269 00:43:35,551 --> 00:43:38,151 - Oh... - That should make it very easy for us 1270 00:43:38,153 --> 00:43:40,554 - to calculate the hypotenuse. - Mmm, mmm. 1271 00:43:40,556 --> 00:43:44,725 A-squared plus B-squared equals C-squared. 1272 00:43:44,727 --> 00:43:46,092 Say that with me, guys. 1273 00:43:46,094 --> 00:43:48,762 ALL: A-squared plus B-squared 1274 00:43:48,764 --> 00:43:51,264 - equals C-squared. - (CHUCKLING) 1275 00:43:51,266 --> 00:43:53,267 Very good. Uh, Teddy? 1276 00:43:53,269 --> 00:43:54,735 You seem to be getting a real kick out of this. 1277 00:43:54,737 --> 00:43:56,770 She got you, Teddy! 1278 00:43:56,772 --> 00:43:59,105 You want to come up and solve the problem? 1279 00:43:59,107 --> 00:44:00,542 Busted! 1280 00:44:03,178 --> 00:44:05,112 If, uh, that's what you... 1281 00:44:05,114 --> 00:44:07,381 if that's what you want me to do. 1282 00:44:07,383 --> 00:44:08,315 (ECHOING): Come on up. 1283 00:44:08,317 --> 00:44:09,716 MACKENZIE: Come on, Teddy. You got this. 1284 00:44:09,718 --> 00:44:10,717 (CLAPPING) 1285 00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:12,351 You got this, Teddy. Teddy! 1286 00:44:12,353 --> 00:44:14,187 Teddy! Teddy! 1287 00:44:14,189 --> 00:44:16,690 Teddy! Ted, Teddy, Teddy! 1288 00:44:16,692 --> 00:44:19,295 ♪ 1289 00:44:24,032 --> 00:44:26,167 CARRIE (ECHOING): Find the value of C. 1290 00:44:39,347 --> 00:44:40,616 You know what? 1291 00:44:41,617 --> 00:44:43,417 (GRUNTING RAPIDLY) 1292 00:44:43,419 --> 00:44:45,552 I think there's something in here. 1293 00:44:45,554 --> 00:44:48,454 (IMITATING AIR HORN BLARING) 1294 00:44:48,456 --> 00:44:51,426 Yo, yo, yo! What up, my night school? 1295 00:44:52,528 --> 00:44:55,261 Who you looking for, fam? 1296 00:44:55,263 --> 00:44:57,129 I'm the principal of this high school, 1297 00:44:57,131 --> 00:44:59,634 and I'm just dropping by to check on... 1298 00:45:01,269 --> 00:45:02,702 What is he doing here? 1299 00:45:02,704 --> 00:45:05,772 I'm studying to get my GED, like everybody else. 1300 00:45:05,774 --> 00:45:10,109 So, if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to learning. 1301 00:45:10,111 --> 00:45:11,677 (CHUCKLES) 1302 00:45:11,679 --> 00:45:13,479 STEWART: Of course. 1303 00:45:13,481 --> 00:45:14,614 My apologies for interrupting. 1304 00:45:14,616 --> 00:45:16,148 Thank you. 1305 00:45:16,150 --> 00:45:19,418 Actually, I would like to observe 1306 00:45:19,420 --> 00:45:21,354 for a minute, if that's okay. 1307 00:45:21,356 --> 00:45:24,524 Please, continue solving the problem. 1308 00:45:24,526 --> 00:45:26,327 Forget I'm here. 1309 00:45:27,629 --> 00:45:28,664 Cool. 1310 00:45:29,765 --> 00:45:31,631 That's fine with me. 1311 00:45:31,633 --> 00:45:33,867 Okay, so if I'm gonna do this, 1312 00:45:33,869 --> 00:45:35,868 let's do it step by step. Let's make sure we do it right. 1313 00:45:35,870 --> 00:45:38,504 First things first... let's get rid of this line. 1314 00:45:38,506 --> 00:45:39,773 (CHUCKLING) 1315 00:45:39,775 --> 00:45:41,340 Because it's written sloppy. 1316 00:45:41,342 --> 00:45:43,242 - So let's get that baby in there. - (HUSHED): Eight. 1317 00:45:43,244 --> 00:45:44,277 Right? 1318 00:45:44,279 --> 00:45:45,411 - Huh. - We got these three sides. 1319 00:45:45,413 --> 00:45:47,380 Got A, B, C. Let's split that. 1320 00:45:47,382 --> 00:45:48,581 That's there. 1321 00:45:48,583 --> 00:45:49,715 - Take these twos away. - Mmm... 1322 00:45:49,717 --> 00:45:51,216 He don't know the answer. 1323 00:45:51,218 --> 00:45:53,252 Because that's what confuses you. 1324 00:45:53,254 --> 00:45:56,188 And then... 1325 00:45:56,190 --> 00:45:57,757 - I'm realizing what it is. - Eight! 1326 00:45:57,759 --> 00:45:59,191 The answer's five. 1327 00:45:59,193 --> 00:46:00,459 It's five. 1328 00:46:00,461 --> 00:46:01,861 Easy. 1329 00:46:01,863 --> 00:46:03,897 Okay, you're looking at five-squared. 1330 00:46:03,899 --> 00:46:06,165 Me up here, I don't have time. 1331 00:46:06,167 --> 00:46:08,367 I don't have time. Why do I even waste my time? 1332 00:46:08,369 --> 00:46:09,802 I don't have time to waste my time 1333 00:46:09,804 --> 00:46:11,203 on the Pythagorean theorem. It's simple. 1334 00:46:11,205 --> 00:46:12,438 - It's simple. - STEWART: Wow. 1335 00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:15,575 That is very impressive, Teddy. 1336 00:46:15,577 --> 00:46:17,376 Very impressive. 1337 00:46:17,378 --> 00:46:20,479 I look forward to seeing how you do on the midterm. 1338 00:46:20,481 --> 00:46:21,881 My midterm. 1339 00:46:21,883 --> 00:46:23,749 All right. 1340 00:46:23,751 --> 00:46:25,585 CARRIE: Are we done here, Stewart, 1341 00:46:25,587 --> 00:46:28,621 or do you want to teach the rest of the class for tonight? 1342 00:46:28,623 --> 00:46:30,256 Carry on, Carrie. 1343 00:46:30,258 --> 00:46:32,258 I don't like his attitude. 1344 00:46:32,260 --> 00:46:34,161 You all have a wonderful class. 1345 00:46:35,396 --> 00:46:37,797 - JAYLEN: Oy! - MACKENZIE: What? 1346 00:46:37,799 --> 00:46:40,499 MILA: God, that guy is a douchebag. 1347 00:46:40,501 --> 00:46:42,401 Are we just gonna gloss over the fact 1348 00:46:42,403 --> 00:46:44,737 that we just watched a prison fight? 1349 00:46:44,739 --> 00:46:46,806 - MACKENZIE: How many classes do we have left? - (SIGHING) 1350 00:46:46,808 --> 00:46:49,574 LUIS: I actually have to work for four hours right now. 1351 00:46:49,576 --> 00:46:52,812 I can give you a ride home for ten bucks, if you want. 1352 00:46:52,814 --> 00:46:54,647 Hey, Carrie. Hey. 1353 00:46:54,649 --> 00:46:55,881 (SIGHS) 1354 00:46:55,883 --> 00:46:57,650 That was real cool what you did 1355 00:46:57,652 --> 00:46:59,351 for me in there at the blackboard. 1356 00:46:59,353 --> 00:47:00,352 You know, that's what I was talking about 1357 00:47:00,354 --> 00:47:01,887 when I just say "watching out for each other." 1358 00:47:01,889 --> 00:47:04,557 You know, you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours? 1359 00:47:04,559 --> 00:47:06,559 Oh, there's not gonna be any more back-scratching, Teddy. 1360 00:47:06,561 --> 00:47:08,761 That's the last time that happens. 1361 00:47:08,763 --> 00:47:11,764 And what was really going on with you at the board anyways? 1362 00:47:11,766 --> 00:47:12,765 Nothing. 1363 00:47:12,767 --> 00:47:14,332 (CHUCKLES) Nothing. 1364 00:47:14,334 --> 00:47:16,569 No, I was just... I wasn't prepared. 1365 00:47:16,571 --> 00:47:18,638 If you're not gonna do the work, drop the class. 1366 00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:19,772 Why would you...? No, Carrie. 1367 00:47:19,774 --> 00:47:21,741 Hey, I'm gonna do the work. 1368 00:47:21,743 --> 00:47:23,341 - You'll see. - We'll see. 1369 00:47:23,343 --> 00:47:25,443 - Yes, we will. - Great. 1370 00:47:25,445 --> 00:47:26,946 - Superb. - Excellent. 1371 00:47:26,948 --> 00:47:28,347 - Good. - Mm-hmm. 1372 00:47:28,349 --> 00:47:30,852 (EXHALING THROUGH LIPS) 1373 00:47:34,789 --> 00:47:36,688 Shit. 1374 00:47:36,690 --> 00:47:38,759 Honey, I'm home. 1375 00:47:42,997 --> 00:47:44,699 You sleeping? 1376 00:47:45,867 --> 00:47:47,467 - (LISA GRUNTS SOFTLY) - You up? 1377 00:47:49,736 --> 00:47:51,739 (SIGHING) 1378 00:47:53,307 --> 00:47:54,407 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 1379 00:47:54,409 --> 00:47:55,541 (CLEARS THROAT) 1380 00:47:55,543 --> 00:47:57,342 (SIGHS) 1381 00:47:57,344 --> 00:47:59,411 Excuse me. 1382 00:47:59,413 --> 00:48:01,346 Booty look good, don't it? 1383 00:48:01,348 --> 00:48:03,849 Too bad your face gonna be in between them books 1384 00:48:03,851 --> 00:48:05,518 and not them cheeks. 1385 00:48:05,520 --> 00:48:07,019 (SIGHS, GROANS) 1386 00:48:07,021 --> 00:48:08,388 Go study. 1387 00:48:09,489 --> 00:48:10,555 (GROANS) 1388 00:48:10,557 --> 00:48:11,591 I don't want to study. 1389 00:48:12,859 --> 00:48:14,459 Mmm. 1390 00:48:14,461 --> 00:48:15,863 ♪ 1391 00:48:17,532 --> 00:48:19,865 Come on, Teddy. Focus. 1392 00:48:19,867 --> 00:48:21,299 Focus, Teddy. 1393 00:48:21,301 --> 00:48:22,436 - (CHAIR DRAGS ON FLOOR) - Focus! 1394 00:48:25,772 --> 00:48:27,505 You'll never get it! 1395 00:48:27,507 --> 00:48:29,475 - (GRUNTS, SIGHS) - Give it back! 1396 00:48:29,477 --> 00:48:31,609 LUIS: Hey, guys, this is my demo. 1397 00:48:31,611 --> 00:48:33,511 ♪ No matter what it takes, you know ♪ 1398 00:48:33,513 --> 00:48:35,447 ♪ I'm always gonna keep on fighting ♪ 1399 00:48:35,449 --> 00:48:36,715 - ♪ I'm fighting... - (PHONE BEEPS) 1400 00:48:36,717 --> 00:48:38,616 (CHUCKLES) 1401 00:48:38,618 --> 00:48:40,786 Little Mac! What are you doing? 1402 00:48:40,788 --> 00:48:42,320 That's my phone. Those were my notes. 1403 00:48:42,322 --> 00:48:43,555 - You should be studying. - (PHONE CLATTERS) 1404 00:48:43,557 --> 00:48:45,925 What the hell? Don't be such a dick. 1405 00:48:45,927 --> 00:48:47,292 - You're gonna study! - I hate you! 1406 00:48:47,294 --> 00:48:48,626 (GRUNTING) 1407 00:48:48,628 --> 00:48:49,928 What's the circumference of that pizza? 1408 00:48:49,930 --> 00:48:50,929 The diameter. 1409 00:48:50,931 --> 00:48:53,498 Just tell me, how many pepperonis on the pizza? 1410 00:48:53,500 --> 00:48:54,599 I'm giving you one star. 1411 00:48:54,601 --> 00:48:56,668 I'm gonna drop you off here in a bad neighborhood. 1412 00:48:56,670 --> 00:48:57,769 How about that? 1413 00:48:57,771 --> 00:48:59,637 - (HORN HONKING) - MAN: Theresa! 1414 00:48:59,639 --> 00:49:01,005 It's after 10:00. Hello! 1415 00:49:01,007 --> 00:49:02,372 That's my Randy. 1416 00:49:02,374 --> 00:49:03,943 Sweetest guy on earth. 1417 00:49:03,945 --> 00:49:06,078 Does anybody else want to try to take a crack at this? 1418 00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:08,379 - I'm kind of busy right now. - Mmm! 1419 00:49:08,381 --> 00:49:10,014 Babe, you seen my Wite-Out? 1420 00:49:10,016 --> 00:49:12,016 What the...? Oh, hell no. 1421 00:49:12,018 --> 00:49:13,618 Trina. 1422 00:49:13,620 --> 00:49:16,789 What-what-what-what, you got robotic side dick now? 1423 00:49:16,791 --> 00:49:18,690 "Fat asses." 1424 00:49:18,692 --> 00:49:20,759 You know what fat asses like? 1425 00:49:20,761 --> 00:49:22,427 Dudes that have a real job. 1426 00:49:22,429 --> 00:49:24,362 - Teddy! - Get your ass out. 1427 00:49:24,364 --> 00:49:26,530 Teddy, if you don't pass that midterm, 1428 00:49:26,532 --> 00:49:28,433 no way homegirl stays with you. 1429 00:49:28,435 --> 00:49:29,869 Huh? 1430 00:49:29,871 --> 00:49:31,603 Think about that. 1431 00:49:31,605 --> 00:49:32,971 We're gonna have to steal the test. 1432 00:49:32,973 --> 00:49:33,972 MACKENZIE: Whoa. 1433 00:49:33,974 --> 00:49:35,440 Mind meld. 1434 00:49:35,442 --> 00:49:36,875 I was thinking the exact same thing. 1435 00:49:36,877 --> 00:49:38,442 JAYLEN: If we being real with it, 1436 00:49:38,444 --> 00:49:40,012 I need as much help as I can get. 1437 00:49:40,014 --> 00:49:42,981 Going from capping bottles to hypotenuses and all that, 1438 00:49:42,983 --> 00:49:45,483 I'm just as confounded by the material 1439 00:49:45,485 --> 00:49:47,685 as the rest of y'all. Feel me? 1440 00:49:47,687 --> 00:49:50,587 I really hate to admit it, but with the language barrier 1441 00:49:50,589 --> 00:49:53,125 and all the Lyft driving I've been doing, 1442 00:49:53,127 --> 00:49:54,926 I'm struggling as well, guys. 1443 00:49:54,928 --> 00:49:57,764 THERESA: I think a caper sounds fun. 1444 00:49:59,499 --> 00:50:01,132 When'd you get here, Theresa? 1445 00:50:01,134 --> 00:50:03,001 Oh, I've been here the whole time. 1446 00:50:03,003 --> 00:50:04,636 People never notice me. 1447 00:50:04,638 --> 00:50:06,504 It happens all the time. It's... 1448 00:50:06,506 --> 00:50:08,907 kind of like a superpower, but... 1449 00:50:08,909 --> 00:50:11,545 one that comes with a crushing loneliness. 1450 00:50:14,814 --> 00:50:17,448 I'm blessed. I'm so blessed. 1451 00:50:17,450 --> 00:50:19,150 Yeah, God is good. 1452 00:50:19,152 --> 00:50:20,451 Mm-hmm. 1453 00:50:20,453 --> 00:50:21,920 TEDDY: Okay. 1454 00:50:21,922 --> 00:50:24,055 Hey, Mila, what about you? 1455 00:50:24,057 --> 00:50:25,824 My parents are gonna be really pissed 1456 00:50:25,826 --> 00:50:27,393 if I get busted again. 1457 00:50:28,728 --> 00:50:30,495 - Yeah, I'm in. - MACKENZIE: I'm in. 1458 00:50:30,497 --> 00:50:31,429 - That's what I'm talking about. - TEDDY: All right. 1459 00:50:31,431 --> 00:50:33,932 I just have one question before we do this. 1460 00:50:33,934 --> 00:50:35,666 - What's up? - Why does Teddy get to be 1461 00:50:35,668 --> 00:50:36,767 the ringleader, guys? Come on. 1462 00:50:36,769 --> 00:50:38,535 - TEDDY: Goddamn it, Luis. - Not now. 1463 00:50:38,537 --> 00:50:41,139 - I mean, seriously, man? - It was his idea. 1464 00:50:41,141 --> 00:50:43,408 He knows this school better than any of us. 1465 00:50:43,410 --> 00:50:45,076 Ah. Just never mind the fact 1466 00:50:45,078 --> 00:50:47,678 that I snuck into a little place... 1467 00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:49,147 called America. 1468 00:50:49,149 --> 00:50:50,881 MACKENZIE: Ha! That's true! 1469 00:50:50,883 --> 00:50:53,017 Luis is hot tonight. 1470 00:50:53,019 --> 00:50:54,986 ♪ 1471 00:50:54,988 --> 00:50:57,155 (YAWNS) 1472 00:50:57,157 --> 00:50:59,092 (SPORTSCASTER SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY OVER PHONE) 1473 00:51:01,894 --> 00:51:05,163 (BUZZER SOUNDS, WHISTLE BLOWS OVER PHONE) 1474 00:51:05,165 --> 00:51:07,100 ♪ 1475 00:51:09,169 --> 00:51:11,503 (DOOR CLATTERS SHUT) 1476 00:51:24,850 --> 00:51:27,019 (CHEWING LOUDLY) 1477 00:51:28,588 --> 00:51:30,121 - Yo, T. - What? 1478 00:51:30,123 --> 00:51:31,856 I appreciate you bringing 1479 00:51:31,858 --> 00:51:33,757 this amazing, blazing Satan chicken. 1480 00:51:33,759 --> 00:51:35,159 It's like, it's hot, but it's not. 1481 00:51:35,161 --> 00:51:37,161 And I don't like spicy food, but this one... 1482 00:51:37,163 --> 00:51:40,665 Let me tell you what else is hot... your breath. 1483 00:51:40,667 --> 00:51:43,101 Why are you breathing on the side of my face like that? 1484 00:51:43,103 --> 00:51:45,535 - Oh. - You're smacking all in my ear, man. Stop. 1485 00:51:45,537 --> 00:51:47,138 (CHEWING LOUDLY) 1486 00:51:47,140 --> 00:51:48,705 You're still smacking. 1487 00:51:48,707 --> 00:51:50,507 Goddamn it, you're done. You're done. 1488 00:51:50,509 --> 00:51:51,609 You're done with that. 1489 00:51:51,611 --> 00:51:53,878 - (SLURPING LOUDLY) - Really? 1490 00:51:53,880 --> 00:51:55,712 God, what-what is your problem, man? 1491 00:51:55,714 --> 00:51:58,216 - What? - I said wear all black. Why didn't you wear black? 1492 00:51:58,218 --> 00:52:01,084 Laundry day. All my darks were in the wash. 1493 00:52:01,086 --> 00:52:02,486 So you wore yellow? 1494 00:52:02,488 --> 00:52:03,821 It's fresh. It's clean. 1495 00:52:03,823 --> 00:52:05,790 Get your... get your arm out my face. 1496 00:52:05,792 --> 00:52:07,158 Get out of my face. 1497 00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:09,060 Focus. Let's go. 1498 00:52:09,062 --> 00:52:10,796 Let's go. 1499 00:52:12,131 --> 00:52:13,797 Yo, Teddy, what's the play, man? 1500 00:52:13,799 --> 00:52:15,800 Last night I saw the janitor cleaning 1501 00:52:15,802 --> 00:52:17,902 Stewart's office around 8:00 p.m. 1502 00:52:17,904 --> 00:52:20,038 I get it... that's the inside man, huh? 1503 00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:22,039 No, Bobby, he's not my inside man. 1504 00:52:22,041 --> 00:52:23,976 He's the janitor. 1505 00:52:26,178 --> 00:52:28,179 (RINGTONE PLAYING) 1506 00:52:28,181 --> 00:52:29,847 Oh, shit. 1507 00:52:29,849 --> 00:52:32,183 (WHISPERING): I got to take this, I got to take it. 1508 00:52:32,185 --> 00:52:33,850 Sh-Shit. 1509 00:52:33,852 --> 00:52:36,253 Aw. 1510 00:52:36,255 --> 00:52:38,055 No, no, no. 1511 00:52:38,057 --> 00:52:39,993 (MUTTERING) 1512 00:52:43,029 --> 00:52:44,228 Hey, babe. 1513 00:52:44,230 --> 00:52:46,129 Hey, baby, I miss you. 1514 00:52:46,131 --> 00:52:47,931 Are you still at work? 1515 00:52:47,933 --> 00:52:51,768 Uh, yeah, yeah, right now I'm in the, uh, I'm in the break room. 1516 00:52:51,770 --> 00:52:53,837 - (LAUGHS) - Can I get a tour of the office? 1517 00:52:53,839 --> 00:52:56,274 If my baby wants a tour, then she can get a tour. 1518 00:52:56,276 --> 00:52:57,975 - You always want to see something. - Ah! 1519 00:52:57,977 --> 00:52:58,976 - If I... - Oh, Teddy. 1520 00:52:58,978 --> 00:53:00,277 - Hey. - Teddy, oh. 1521 00:53:00,279 --> 00:53:02,745 We got a situation here, we got a real... 1522 00:53:02,747 --> 00:53:04,614 - (FARTS) - Hot lava, hot lava. - What? Hey. 1523 00:53:04,616 --> 00:53:05,882 - Okay. - Um... 1524 00:53:05,884 --> 00:53:07,718 Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God, oh, God! 1525 00:53:07,720 --> 00:53:08,919 - Aah! - Wha...? 1526 00:53:08,921 --> 00:53:10,053 God, turtle head sticking out. 1527 00:53:10,055 --> 00:53:11,321 - Oh, that's a big one. - Uh... 1528 00:53:11,323 --> 00:53:13,689 - Babe, what is going on over there? - MACKENZIE: Oh, big shit. 1529 00:53:13,691 --> 00:53:15,058 - Honey, that's, uh, that's actually... - (FARTS) 1530 00:53:15,060 --> 00:53:16,960 ...that's actually one of my account managers. 1531 00:53:16,962 --> 00:53:17,794 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 1532 00:53:17,796 --> 00:53:19,896 Personalities all over the office. 1533 00:53:19,898 --> 00:53:21,031 - Uh, nonstop laughs. - (DIARRHEA SPLASHING) 1534 00:53:21,033 --> 00:53:22,332 - Hot lava! - Nonstop. 1535 00:53:22,334 --> 00:53:23,934 You know how I do... 1536 00:53:23,936 --> 00:53:25,869 play around... at the office. 1537 00:53:25,871 --> 00:53:27,305 (MACKENZIE LAUGHS) 1538 00:53:27,307 --> 00:53:28,306 - Who's...? - BOBBY: Hey, yo, what's up, bro? 1539 00:53:28,308 --> 00:53:30,274 You hung up on me, man. 1540 00:53:30,276 --> 00:53:32,075 - Who's that? - That's one of my, 1541 00:53:32,077 --> 00:53:33,910 that's one of my clients there, right there. 1542 00:53:33,912 --> 00:53:35,912 Yeah, we were, we were going over his portfolio. 1543 00:53:35,914 --> 00:53:37,580 Kind of looks like he's in prison. 1544 00:53:37,582 --> 00:53:39,983 Oh, my God, you're so beautiful, baby. 1545 00:53:39,985 --> 00:53:41,651 TEDDY: Well, he looks like that 1546 00:53:41,653 --> 00:53:43,954 - 'cause he is... insider trading. - (FARTS) 1547 00:53:43,956 --> 00:53:45,789 He was wrongfully accused. 1548 00:53:45,791 --> 00:53:48,624 You're looking like J.Lo and Beyoncé, mama. 1549 00:53:48,626 --> 00:53:50,293 Would you mind showing me your privates? 1550 00:53:50,295 --> 00:53:51,762 Enough, Bobby. 1551 00:53:51,764 --> 00:53:53,096 Like, turn around, let me see that ass, 1552 00:53:53,098 --> 00:53:54,631 please, a little tit, something. 1553 00:53:54,633 --> 00:53:55,966 Excuse me? 1554 00:53:55,968 --> 00:53:57,300 I'm, like, really strong right now. 1555 00:53:57,302 --> 00:54:00,203 Like, I could do things to you... legendary shit. 1556 00:54:00,205 --> 00:54:01,171 Enough, Bobby. 1557 00:54:01,173 --> 00:54:02,972 I'll take some upper thigh, but, for real, 1558 00:54:02,974 --> 00:54:05,208 I really want to see some punani. 1559 00:54:05,210 --> 00:54:06,176 Excuse me? 1560 00:54:06,178 --> 00:54:08,211 - (MACKENZIE GROANS) - Listen... oh, my God. 1561 00:54:08,213 --> 00:54:09,279 MACKENZIE: I don't know what you put in me. 1562 00:54:09,281 --> 00:54:10,280 It just hit me. 1563 00:54:10,282 --> 00:54:11,714 But it feels like the Devil! 1564 00:54:11,716 --> 00:54:14,083 It just hit me what he said, honey. 1565 00:54:14,085 --> 00:54:15,319 He's saying "piñata." 1566 00:54:15,321 --> 00:54:17,654 Man, I ain't see some punani in so long. 1567 00:54:17,656 --> 00:54:19,122 Bobby likes to hit piñatas. 1568 00:54:19,124 --> 00:54:20,656 - MACKENZIE: No! - Let me... you know what I'm gonna do? 1569 00:54:20,658 --> 00:54:21,958 Let me, let me call you back. 1570 00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:22,893 - Uh... - I love you, 1571 00:54:22,895 --> 00:54:25,095 and I... we'll do the tour when I'm done. 1572 00:54:25,097 --> 00:54:26,929 Bye, babe. 1573 00:54:26,931 --> 00:54:28,231 What was that, Bobby? 1574 00:54:28,233 --> 00:54:30,000 Yo, Ted, good looking, bro. 1575 00:54:30,002 --> 00:54:31,368 That's my fiancée, man. 1576 00:54:31,370 --> 00:54:32,601 You don't talk to her like that. 1577 00:54:32,603 --> 00:54:36,339 When I go back to the cell, I got the legendary socky-sock. 1578 00:54:36,341 --> 00:54:38,707 You're not having a sock session to my woman. 1579 00:54:38,709 --> 00:54:40,177 That's, that's not going to happen. 1580 00:54:40,179 --> 00:54:42,245 - I'm going all out. - (MACKENZIE GRUNTS) 1581 00:54:42,247 --> 00:54:43,246 - (DIARRHEA SPLASHING) - (STAMMERS) 1582 00:54:43,248 --> 00:54:44,814 Okay, what is in your ass, Mac? 1583 00:54:44,816 --> 00:54:46,782 MACKENZIE: Cut me a break, man. 1584 00:54:46,784 --> 00:54:47,585 I've had enough! 1585 00:54:50,188 --> 00:54:52,322 Hold on a second, we got a code red. 1586 00:54:52,324 --> 00:54:54,091 We got a code red. 1587 00:54:54,093 --> 00:54:55,859 Teddy, I got no toilet paper. 1588 00:54:55,861 --> 00:54:58,095 Toilet paper, Teddy, one-time me! 1589 00:54:58,097 --> 00:54:59,129 One-time me! 1590 00:54:59,131 --> 00:55:00,898 Teddy! 1591 00:55:04,136 --> 00:55:06,136 (JANITOR SPRAYS CLEANER) 1592 00:55:06,138 --> 00:55:07,870 All right, guys, listen. 1593 00:55:07,872 --> 00:55:09,705 When the janitor exits, 1594 00:55:09,707 --> 00:55:11,408 we're gonna go out, we're gonna catch the door. 1595 00:55:11,410 --> 00:55:13,309 And then we're gonna enter quietly. 1596 00:55:13,311 --> 00:55:14,612 - Okay. - Okay? 1597 00:55:15,881 --> 00:55:17,015 Wait a minute. 1598 00:55:18,016 --> 00:55:19,249 Where's Big Mac? 1599 00:55:19,251 --> 00:55:21,184 I thought he was with us. 1600 00:55:21,186 --> 00:55:23,085 He... 1601 00:55:23,087 --> 00:55:24,755 (SIGHS) Damn it. 1602 00:55:30,429 --> 00:55:31,896 What's he doing? 1603 00:55:33,132 --> 00:55:34,864 - (GRUNTING) - (TEDDY GASPS) 1604 00:55:34,866 --> 00:55:37,299 (GRUNTING AND GROANING) 1605 00:55:37,301 --> 00:55:39,236 - Oh, my God. - What are you doing? 1606 00:55:39,238 --> 00:55:41,039 - Come on, come on, come on, come on. - Mac! 1607 00:55:43,275 --> 00:55:45,975 - Holy shit, it worked. - Oh, my God! 1608 00:55:45,977 --> 00:55:47,143 - (LAUGHING) - TEDDY: Mac! 1609 00:55:47,145 --> 00:55:48,244 Did you just kill him? 1610 00:55:48,246 --> 00:55:49,245 No, I didn't kill him. 1611 00:55:49,247 --> 00:55:50,246 I just choked him out. 1612 00:55:50,248 --> 00:55:51,281 You said no witnesses. 1613 00:55:51,283 --> 00:55:52,748 When did I say that? 1614 00:55:52,750 --> 00:55:54,119 You didn't say that? 1615 00:55:55,187 --> 00:55:56,219 Oh, God. 1616 00:55:56,221 --> 00:55:57,287 You know what? 1617 00:55:57,289 --> 00:55:58,888 I got my signals crossed. 1618 00:55:58,890 --> 00:56:00,723 There's a lot of instructions, Teddy. 1619 00:56:00,725 --> 00:56:02,124 I didn't say anything about... 1620 00:56:02,126 --> 00:56:04,961 You know what? You are going to fix this. 1621 00:56:04,963 --> 00:56:06,795 Do you hear me, Mac? You're gonna hide this body. 1622 00:56:06,797 --> 00:56:08,831 - Chop him up? - Hide... 1623 00:56:08,833 --> 00:56:10,733 - Burn it? - Hide it. 1624 00:56:10,735 --> 00:56:11,736 Chop, burn, bury? 1625 00:56:14,305 --> 00:56:16,208 - Hey. Anybody got anything? - No. 1626 00:56:17,742 --> 00:56:19,041 TEDDY: All right, Mila, how we looking? 1627 00:56:19,043 --> 00:56:20,843 - (BUZZING) - Keep looking. 1628 00:56:20,845 --> 00:56:23,479 - Suck my balls, Teddy! (LAUGHS) - Shit. 1629 00:56:23,481 --> 00:56:25,814 - Shit. - You should've seen your face. 1630 00:56:25,816 --> 00:56:28,118 - You look ridiculous. - Shh! 1631 00:56:28,120 --> 00:56:29,852 MACKENZIE: All right, I stashed the body, 1632 00:56:29,854 --> 00:56:31,887 and God willing, he'll wake up in a couple hours. 1633 00:56:31,889 --> 00:56:33,856 Also, that baseball coach/ principal guy, 1634 00:56:33,858 --> 00:56:35,324 he's on his way. 1635 00:56:35,326 --> 00:56:37,326 TEDDY: What? Why wouldn't you lead with that? 1636 00:56:37,328 --> 00:56:40,930 (QUIET CHATTER) 1637 00:56:40,932 --> 00:56:43,332 TEDDY: Damn. It's the PTA meeting. 1638 00:56:43,334 --> 00:56:45,203 Oh, shit. 1639 00:56:46,337 --> 00:56:48,204 Theresa, you're up. 1640 00:56:48,206 --> 00:56:49,371 - What? What? I... - Listen to me. 1641 00:56:49,373 --> 00:56:51,074 - Okay. - I need you to go out there, 1642 00:56:51,076 --> 00:56:52,275 and I need you to stall. 1643 00:56:52,277 --> 00:56:53,809 Oh, no, no, no, no. I can't flirt. 1644 00:56:53,811 --> 00:56:55,177 - I-I don't know any moves. - I-I don't need that. 1645 00:56:55,179 --> 00:56:56,546 I haven't flirted since like 1996, and even then, 1646 00:56:56,548 --> 00:56:58,314 it was like offering to give the cop a handy 1647 00:56:58,316 --> 00:56:59,949 to get off a speeding ticket, and guess what. 1648 00:56:59,951 --> 00:57:01,317 He didn't take it. I'm bad at it. 1649 00:57:01,319 --> 00:57:02,551 That's not what I'm asking you to do. 1650 00:57:02,553 --> 00:57:03,953 In my day, it was really innocent. 1651 00:57:03,955 --> 00:57:05,422 Now it's all about the butt. 1652 00:57:05,424 --> 00:57:06,922 I heard a guy the other day say, 1653 00:57:06,924 --> 00:57:09,825 "I'm gonna crack that butt like a walnut." 1654 00:57:09,827 --> 00:57:11,826 - What? - What does that even mean? 1655 00:57:11,828 --> 00:57:13,229 - Why would you start there? - Stop it. 1656 00:57:13,231 --> 00:57:14,996 Wouldn't you want to start in the front? 1657 00:57:14,998 --> 00:57:16,499 - Theresa, listen. - With a nice missionary position, 1658 00:57:16,501 --> 00:57:18,467 - you know, some gentle touching. - (TEDDY GROANS) 1659 00:57:18,469 --> 00:57:20,069 In my day, maybe once in your lifetime, 1660 00:57:20,071 --> 00:57:21,904 you might get the end of a pinky, 1661 00:57:21,906 --> 00:57:23,372 and that was the thrill of a lifetime, okay? 1662 00:57:23,374 --> 00:57:25,274 Stop it. That's a lot of information 1663 00:57:25,276 --> 00:57:26,841 that I did not need to know. 1664 00:57:26,843 --> 00:57:27,943 Yeah, that was a lot. 1665 00:57:27,945 --> 00:57:29,445 Go talk about bake sales. 1666 00:57:29,447 --> 00:57:31,013 - Mom stuff. Not-not butt stuff. - Yeah, mom stuff. 1667 00:57:31,015 --> 00:57:32,848 - Go mom it. - I-I'll try. I'll try. 1668 00:57:32,850 --> 00:57:34,183 - Okay? Okay. - I can do that. 1669 00:57:34,185 --> 00:57:35,384 - Go, go. - Got it. Okay. 1670 00:57:35,386 --> 00:57:38,820 Shit. Luis, go out there before she puts 1671 00:57:38,822 --> 00:57:40,122 - something in her butt. - Okay. 1672 00:57:40,124 --> 00:57:41,257 Okay? 1673 00:57:41,259 --> 00:57:43,060 (TAPPING) 1674 00:57:45,196 --> 00:57:46,462 What are you doing, Mac? 1675 00:57:46,464 --> 00:57:47,996 Looking for trapdoors. 1676 00:57:47,998 --> 00:57:50,466 (TAPPING CONTINUES) 1677 00:57:50,468 --> 00:57:52,368 I'm glad you're here, Mac. 1678 00:57:52,370 --> 00:57:53,335 Send it to me first, please. 1679 00:57:53,337 --> 00:57:54,136 - Right, right. - We can e-mail you the rest. 1680 00:57:54,138 --> 00:57:55,004 'Cause I just want to... Thank you. 1681 00:57:55,006 --> 00:57:56,171 - That would be great. - I'll send out 1682 00:57:56,173 --> 00:57:58,340 - that e-mail tonight, okay? - Yeah. Thank you so much. 1683 00:57:58,342 --> 00:57:59,575 - Okay, bye. - Drive home safe. 1684 00:57:59,577 --> 00:58:01,175 Oh, hey. 1685 00:58:01,177 --> 00:58:02,411 Hi. 1686 00:58:02,413 --> 00:58:04,614 Thank you for that great, wonderful meeting. 1687 00:58:04,616 --> 00:58:06,448 I'm sorry, do I know you? 1688 00:58:06,450 --> 00:58:08,384 I was in there. Remember? 1689 00:58:08,386 --> 00:58:09,618 Yes, yes, yes, yes. 1690 00:58:09,620 --> 00:58:11,853 - Hi. Mrs. Howerton. - No, you, uh, just... 1691 00:58:11,855 --> 00:58:13,354 STEWART: Mrs. Howerton. Yes, of course. 1692 00:58:13,356 --> 00:58:15,190 No, you brought up, uh, several compelling issues. 1693 00:58:15,192 --> 00:58:16,525 I sure did. 1694 00:58:16,527 --> 00:58:18,260 STEWART: Well, what can I help you with? 1695 00:58:18,262 --> 00:58:20,362 - She sucks at this. Hurry. - I'm almost there. 1696 00:58:20,364 --> 00:58:23,064 So my child gets an assignment about the solar system, 1697 00:58:23,066 --> 00:58:24,433 and it's to make a diorama, 1698 00:58:24,435 --> 00:58:26,100 and he doesn't know how to make a diorama. 1699 00:58:26,102 --> 00:58:27,503 I'm the one with the hot glue gun 1700 00:58:27,505 --> 00:58:29,371 in the middle of the night... it's 11:00 p.m. 1701 00:58:29,373 --> 00:58:31,206 I mean, don't get me wrong, we're blessed to go to 1702 00:58:31,208 --> 00:58:32,574 - school here, but I'm... - I'm sorry, I have to go. 1703 00:58:32,576 --> 00:58:34,376 - Okay? Call my office. - I will. - Hurry up. 1704 00:58:34,378 --> 00:58:35,411 I'm going, I'm going. Calm down. 1705 00:58:35,413 --> 00:58:37,045 Come on, Mila. 1706 00:58:37,047 --> 00:58:38,279 You've made some great points, 1707 00:58:38,281 --> 00:58:40,382 but I have to go now. Good night. 1708 00:58:40,384 --> 00:58:42,318 - Wait a minute. - Thank you. I have to go. 1709 00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:44,520 - Okay, I really have to go. - Wait. No. (GASPS) 1710 00:58:44,522 --> 00:58:45,920 - Wait, wait, wait. - What? 1711 00:58:45,922 --> 00:58:47,456 - (THERESA SIGHS) - Oh! Are you okay? 1712 00:58:47,458 --> 00:58:48,890 I feel faint. 1713 00:58:48,892 --> 00:58:50,391 Well, let's get you some water. 1714 00:58:50,393 --> 00:58:52,094 - Are you...? - Thanks for catching me. 1715 00:58:52,096 --> 00:58:54,463 Of course. Are you all right? 1716 00:58:54,465 --> 00:58:56,498 - I... - (MOANS SOFTLY) 1717 00:58:56,500 --> 00:58:58,434 Are you having a seizure? 1718 00:58:58,436 --> 00:59:00,501 (EXHALES, SLURPS) 1719 00:59:00,503 --> 00:59:02,437 Do you have something in your teeth? 1720 00:59:02,439 --> 00:59:05,307 - I wish I had you in my teeth. - No, no, no, no, no, no. 1721 00:59:05,309 --> 00:59:07,576 Okay, no, I didn't realize that's what this was. 1722 00:59:07,578 --> 00:59:09,143 - No, thank you, ma'am. - Gentle touching. 1723 00:59:09,145 --> 00:59:10,411 I am the principal of your child's school. 1724 00:59:10,413 --> 00:59:11,680 - I have to walk away now, okay? - I... 1725 00:59:11,682 --> 00:59:13,147 I'm in a loveless marriage. Please. 1726 00:59:13,149 --> 00:59:14,248 I am not participating in this! 1727 00:59:14,250 --> 00:59:15,084 - You don't have to participate. - To a professional. 1728 00:59:15,086 --> 00:59:17,018 I'll do it. I'll do all the work. 1729 00:59:17,020 --> 00:59:18,287 - No, I'm... (SIGHS) - I'll do it all. 1730 00:59:18,289 --> 00:59:19,488 - If you just... - Ma'am. 1731 00:59:19,490 --> 00:59:20,622 - ...look me in the eyes... - Ma'am, ma'am. 1732 00:59:20,624 --> 00:59:21,623 Not appropriate, okay? 1733 00:59:21,625 --> 00:59:22,624 - Okay, here it is. - Okay? 1734 00:59:22,626 --> 00:59:23,692 If this is what you want. 1735 00:59:23,694 --> 00:59:24,692 This is what it's about with you. 1736 00:59:24,694 --> 00:59:26,627 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not looking. 1737 00:59:26,629 --> 00:59:27,830 Crack it open like a walnut. 1738 00:59:27,832 --> 00:59:30,366 - Thank you. No, thank you. - Crack that nut like a walnut. 1739 00:59:30,368 --> 00:59:31,533 Thank you. No, thank you. 1740 00:59:31,535 --> 00:59:33,602 - Crack that nut open. - Thank you. 1741 00:59:33,604 --> 00:59:36,237 - No, thank you. - Do what men do with women's asses. 1742 00:59:36,239 --> 00:59:37,438 - (SLAPPING) - Oh, man. 1743 00:59:37,440 --> 00:59:38,239 - Just tap it! - I can't... 1744 00:59:38,241 --> 00:59:39,041 I can't stand here for this, okay? 1745 00:59:39,043 --> 00:59:40,041 - Give it a crack... - Good night. 1746 00:59:40,043 --> 00:59:43,111 - Come on, give it some. - (TAKING DEEP BREATHS) 1747 00:59:43,113 --> 00:59:45,279 Oh, that was so hard. 1748 00:59:45,281 --> 00:59:47,715 She wanted you so bad. 1749 00:59:47,717 --> 00:59:50,251 But you can't go there. 1750 00:59:50,253 --> 00:59:52,621 Principals have principles. 1751 00:59:52,623 --> 00:59:55,390 Mmm. Oh, but you know Stewie 1752 00:59:55,392 --> 00:59:57,158 would've tore that ass up, though! 1753 00:59:57,160 --> 00:59:58,459 (CHUCKLES) 1754 00:59:58,461 --> 01:00:00,561 Not a black voice. 1755 01:00:00,563 --> 01:00:02,630 (STEWART CLEARS THROAT QUIETLY) 1756 01:00:02,632 --> 01:00:05,601 ♪ 1757 01:00:05,603 --> 01:00:08,336 STEWART (SIGHS): Let's see. 1758 01:00:08,338 --> 01:00:10,173 (CLEARS THROAT) 1759 01:00:11,674 --> 01:00:14,611 (TYPING) 1760 01:00:26,389 --> 01:00:27,458 (STEWART SIGHS) 1761 01:00:32,328 --> 01:00:34,097 (GASPS SOFTLY) 1762 01:00:35,198 --> 01:00:36,699 (SNIFFS QUIETLY) 1763 01:00:42,572 --> 01:00:43,573 (STIFLED SNEEZE) 1764 01:00:44,707 --> 01:00:47,210 Hello? Hello? 1765 01:00:48,178 --> 01:00:49,412 Somebody in here? 1766 01:00:55,218 --> 01:00:56,619 I have a bat. 1767 01:00:57,687 --> 01:00:59,220 And I'm not afraid to use it. 1768 01:00:59,222 --> 01:01:02,222 If there is someone in here, 1769 01:01:02,224 --> 01:01:03,661 you are trespassing. 1770 01:01:04,728 --> 01:01:08,062 And I am well within my rights 1771 01:01:08,064 --> 01:01:09,564 to defend myself. 1772 01:01:09,566 --> 01:01:12,300 So come on out, 1773 01:01:12,302 --> 01:01:15,704 and I won't bash your head. 1774 01:01:15,706 --> 01:01:18,272 MAN (IN DISTANCE): Help! 1775 01:01:18,274 --> 01:01:19,740 Anybody out there? 1776 01:01:19,742 --> 01:01:22,510 (BANGING ON DOOR IN DISTANCE) 1777 01:01:22,512 --> 01:01:24,211 Get me out of here! 1778 01:01:24,213 --> 01:01:25,713 - (BANGING CONTINUES) - (MAN YELLS) 1779 01:01:25,715 --> 01:01:27,381 Whoa. 1780 01:01:27,383 --> 01:01:29,650 - Okay. - What the hell, Mac? 1781 01:01:29,652 --> 01:01:31,752 - That was close. - You're damn right it was, Mac. 1782 01:01:31,754 --> 01:01:33,154 I wonder why. 1783 01:01:33,156 --> 01:01:34,689 Yeah, I... well, it's 'cause I sneezed. 1784 01:01:34,691 --> 01:01:36,156 I know what you did. 1785 01:01:36,158 --> 01:01:37,625 What? 1786 01:01:37,627 --> 01:01:39,128 I got it. 1787 01:01:41,164 --> 01:01:43,364 I really tried. I even did the butt stuff. 1788 01:01:43,366 --> 01:01:45,198 I told you don't do the butt stuff. 1789 01:01:45,200 --> 01:01:46,334 I don't know, fam, might've worked. 1790 01:01:46,336 --> 01:01:48,368 Looked like he might've sauced his drawers, real talk. 1791 01:01:48,370 --> 01:01:49,670 He what? 1792 01:01:49,672 --> 01:01:51,205 He-he was turned on. 1793 01:01:51,207 --> 01:01:52,273 Really? 1794 01:01:52,275 --> 01:01:53,341 Shit, I was, too. 1795 01:01:53,343 --> 01:01:54,342 Hey. 1796 01:01:54,344 --> 01:01:55,576 Thanks, Jaylen. 1797 01:01:55,578 --> 01:01:57,478 You got that little eco-friendly vibe going. 1798 01:01:57,480 --> 01:01:58,713 What's eco-friendly? 1799 01:01:58,715 --> 01:02:00,146 Very little waste. 1800 01:02:00,148 --> 01:02:02,349 Oh, I thought you meant her bush. 1801 01:02:02,351 --> 01:02:04,685 No. Oh, you know what? I'm with that. 1802 01:02:04,687 --> 01:02:06,487 Hey, now! (LAUGHS) 1803 01:02:06,489 --> 01:02:07,722 Okay, Jaylen, Jaylen! 1804 01:02:07,724 --> 01:02:09,222 We gotta go, y'all. Let's go. 1805 01:02:09,224 --> 01:02:10,658 Yeah, let's go. Come on, come on. 1806 01:02:10,660 --> 01:02:12,227 Shit. 1807 01:02:14,563 --> 01:02:15,796 (RATTLING) 1808 01:02:15,798 --> 01:02:17,832 MAN (MUFFLED): Who's out there? 1809 01:02:17,834 --> 01:02:20,703 - (BANGING) - Somebody help me, please. 1810 01:02:23,438 --> 01:02:25,105 - What happened? - (PANTING) 1811 01:02:25,107 --> 01:02:26,673 I don't know. Someone grabbed me from behind 1812 01:02:26,675 --> 01:02:28,543 and threw me in the slop sink. 1813 01:02:28,545 --> 01:02:30,545 Game face, Lonnie. 1814 01:02:30,547 --> 01:02:33,446 - (BEEP, CLUNK) - We're on lockdown. 1815 01:02:33,448 --> 01:02:34,782 MACKENZIE (LAUGHING): Ah, yeah! 1816 01:02:34,784 --> 01:02:37,284 - That'll get him. - Hey! - (ALARM BLARING) 1817 01:02:37,286 --> 01:02:39,120 - Oh, shit. - Go, go, go! - Hey! 1818 01:02:39,122 --> 01:02:41,656 Shit. 1819 01:02:41,658 --> 01:02:43,791 - What do we...? Hey. - Shit. 1820 01:02:43,793 --> 01:02:46,226 Oh. Hey, Bobby. 1821 01:02:46,228 --> 01:02:48,562 Bobby, shit just got real, man, what do we do? 1822 01:02:48,564 --> 01:02:50,697 Man, I don't know, just don't get shot, bro. 1823 01:02:50,699 --> 01:02:51,832 What do you mean, "don't get shot"? 1824 01:02:51,834 --> 01:02:53,701 Bobby, you're supposed to be a hardened criminal, man. 1825 01:02:53,703 --> 01:02:55,536 That can't be your advice. 1826 01:02:55,538 --> 01:02:57,404 What the hell'd you go to jail for, Bobby? 1827 01:02:57,406 --> 01:02:59,339 I robbed Whole Foods, bro. 1828 01:02:59,341 --> 01:03:00,740 I robbed Whole Foods. 1829 01:03:00,742 --> 01:03:02,175 That's your crime? 1830 01:03:02,177 --> 01:03:04,745 You went to jail for stealing $15 lettuce? 1831 01:03:04,747 --> 01:03:06,581 No, bro, you're sleeping. 1832 01:03:06,583 --> 01:03:09,249 I moved some coke and some dope in the day, but my kale game... 1833 01:03:09,251 --> 01:03:11,384 - my kale game... - No. 1834 01:03:11,386 --> 01:03:12,385 Now, that's mean! 1835 01:03:12,387 --> 01:03:13,887 Grass-fed beef. 1836 01:03:13,889 --> 01:03:16,256 You don't know nothing about no free-range chicken. 1837 01:03:16,258 --> 01:03:18,291 - Thug life! (STAMMERS) - Jaylen, calm... calm down. 1838 01:03:18,293 --> 01:03:19,894 - And I had all the farmer markets on smash. - No, no. 1839 01:03:19,896 --> 01:03:21,428 You don't get to explain. 1840 01:03:21,430 --> 01:03:23,296 You don't get to expla... Bye. 1841 01:03:23,298 --> 01:03:24,664 All right, y'all, this way. 1842 01:03:24,666 --> 01:03:25,665 STEWART (OVER P.A.): Attention, intruders. 1843 01:03:25,667 --> 01:03:27,335 This is Principal Patowsky. 1844 01:03:27,337 --> 01:03:30,905 The exit doors are locked down. There is no escape. 1845 01:03:30,907 --> 01:03:34,374 I-I can't believe we're gonna die over a GED practice test. 1846 01:03:34,376 --> 01:03:35,642 - It's not even a real test. - Listen. 1847 01:03:35,644 --> 01:03:37,544 I just did this to get out of the house. 1848 01:03:37,546 --> 01:03:38,846 I thought this was gonna be fun. 1849 01:03:38,848 --> 01:03:40,180 You know, we're gonna break in... 1850 01:03:40,182 --> 01:03:41,414 Just shut up! Just shut up! 1851 01:03:41,416 --> 01:03:43,918 Shut up! Goddamn! 1852 01:03:43,920 --> 01:03:46,453 Been talking about your kids and everything all day! 1853 01:03:46,455 --> 01:03:48,188 This ain't the time. 1854 01:03:48,190 --> 01:03:49,623 Now, y'all pull it together. 1855 01:03:49,625 --> 01:03:50,925 We are fine. 1856 01:03:50,927 --> 01:03:52,292 We-we... we are okay. 1857 01:03:52,294 --> 01:03:53,728 The roof. Let's hit the roof. 1858 01:03:53,730 --> 01:03:55,295 Okay, when I went to school here, 1859 01:03:55,297 --> 01:03:56,496 that's how we got out of school. 1860 01:03:56,498 --> 01:03:58,698 And then we would jump onto the elementary school roof. 1861 01:03:58,700 --> 01:03:59,635 Come on! 1862 01:04:01,202 --> 01:04:03,671 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 1863 01:04:03,673 --> 01:04:05,238 - Move it, move it! - This is a bad idea. 1864 01:04:05,240 --> 01:04:06,339 - Come on! - This is a bad idea! 1865 01:04:06,341 --> 01:04:08,241 - Watch it, watch it. - Whoa, whoa! 1866 01:04:08,243 --> 01:04:09,843 - Whoa, whoa! - Whoa! 1867 01:04:09,845 --> 01:04:11,277 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Whoa. 1868 01:04:11,279 --> 01:04:12,479 - Oh, my God. - Whoa, whoa! 1869 01:04:12,481 --> 01:04:13,713 Okay, back up. 1870 01:04:13,715 --> 01:04:15,215 - Listen to me. - Come on! 1871 01:04:15,217 --> 01:04:16,784 Swear to you, when I went to school here, 1872 01:04:16,786 --> 01:04:18,351 that jump did not seem that high. 1873 01:04:18,353 --> 01:04:19,719 There's no way I can make that. 1874 01:04:19,721 --> 01:04:21,855 I can jump like three feet. My knees and my back 1875 01:04:21,857 --> 01:04:23,923 are totally shot from moving boxes, Teddy! 1876 01:04:23,925 --> 01:04:25,224 - All right. - What are we gonna do? 1877 01:04:25,226 --> 01:04:26,225 - What are we gonna do? - Listen, listen. 1878 01:04:26,227 --> 01:04:27,360 I got it. 1879 01:04:27,362 --> 01:04:28,728 Let's just say it's 15 feet. 1880 01:04:28,730 --> 01:04:29,864 Oh, God. 1881 01:04:29,866 --> 01:04:31,364 TEDDY: Take that 15 feet, 1882 01:04:31,366 --> 01:04:33,233 minus the three feet that you can jump. 1883 01:04:33,235 --> 01:04:34,467 What are you talking about? 1884 01:04:34,469 --> 01:04:36,736 All we gotta do is use the Pythagorean theorem. 1885 01:04:36,738 --> 01:04:37,704 Nobody was listening in class. 1886 01:04:37,706 --> 01:04:39,539 - Nobody knows how to do that. - Oh, my God. 1887 01:04:39,541 --> 01:04:40,774 No, wait, wait, wait. Carrie said... Carrie said, 1888 01:04:40,776 --> 01:04:41,976 in order to do the Pythagorean theorem, 1889 01:04:41,978 --> 01:04:43,743 you-you have to know the hypotenuse. 1890 01:04:43,745 --> 01:04:46,346 All we gotta do is hypotenuse it. 1891 01:04:46,348 --> 01:04:47,947 A-squared plus B-squared equals C-squared. 1892 01:04:47,949 --> 01:04:49,716 If you know... know two sides, 1893 01:04:49,718 --> 01:04:51,018 then that'll help you figure out the third, 1894 01:04:51,020 --> 01:04:52,686 so it's roughly six feet across, 1895 01:04:52,688 --> 01:04:55,388 and 15-squared is 225 divided by six-squared... 1896 01:04:55,390 --> 01:04:56,890 - Hypotenuse it! - Wait, what did I just say? 1897 01:04:56,892 --> 01:04:58,357 - MACKENZIE: It's 36. - Yeah, 36. 1898 01:04:58,359 --> 01:04:59,726 But you don't divide it. You add it. 1899 01:04:59,728 --> 01:05:01,360 So, what did I just say? The, um... the, uh... 1900 01:05:01,362 --> 01:05:02,594 - She's the best one at math. - Wait, no, uh... 1901 01:05:02,596 --> 01:05:03,797 - Hypotenuse it! - No, no, you can do this. 1902 01:05:03,799 --> 01:05:05,865 - By six-squared, then... I-I don't know. - No. 1903 01:05:05,867 --> 01:05:07,333 No, come on. You got this. 1904 01:05:07,335 --> 01:05:08,802 (OTHERS YELLING) 1905 01:05:08,804 --> 01:05:10,402 - Oh, my God! - (WHOOPING AND YELLING) 1906 01:05:10,404 --> 01:05:12,538 - Mila! - Oh, my God! 1907 01:05:12,540 --> 01:05:14,607 Oh! 1908 01:05:14,609 --> 01:05:15,642 - You all right? - Guys! 1909 01:05:15,644 --> 01:05:17,410 It's not a hard math problem. 1910 01:05:17,412 --> 01:05:18,745 It's a simple physics problem. 1911 01:05:18,747 --> 01:05:19,946 Just jump. 1912 01:05:19,948 --> 01:05:21,981 Did you... did you hypotenuse it? 1913 01:05:21,983 --> 01:05:23,717 Yeah, I hypotenused it. 1914 01:05:23,719 --> 01:05:25,350 Can you just jump? 1915 01:05:25,352 --> 01:05:26,853 Mac, you're up next. 1916 01:05:26,855 --> 01:05:28,521 - No. No. - Yes. 1917 01:05:28,523 --> 01:05:30,390 Mac, don't you give me that, okay? 1918 01:05:30,392 --> 01:05:31,958 When I think "man," I think you. 1919 01:05:31,960 --> 01:05:35,327 I think about how proud Little Mac must be. 1920 01:05:35,329 --> 01:05:37,030 I want you to do what you do best 1921 01:05:37,032 --> 01:05:38,363 and go be great. 1922 01:05:38,365 --> 01:05:40,633 Okay. Yeah. 1923 01:05:40,635 --> 01:05:42,435 Get across that roof, Mac. 1924 01:05:42,437 --> 01:05:43,670 - Yeah! Okay! - All right? 1925 01:05:43,672 --> 01:05:44,871 - All right. - You got this. 1926 01:05:44,873 --> 01:05:47,040 Mac coming in! Step back! 1927 01:05:47,042 --> 01:05:48,875 - Let's go, Mac. - Thank you, Teddy. 1928 01:05:48,877 --> 01:05:50,844 Any time. 1929 01:05:50,846 --> 01:05:52,312 Mac attack! 1930 01:05:52,314 --> 01:05:54,013 (SCREAMING) 1931 01:05:54,015 --> 01:05:55,314 Mac attack! 1932 01:05:55,316 --> 01:05:57,316 ♪ Owner of a lonely heart... 1933 01:05:57,318 --> 01:05:59,518 (SCREAMING CONTINUES) 1934 01:05:59,520 --> 01:06:00,987 (GROANS, SCREAMS) 1935 01:06:00,989 --> 01:06:02,889 (ALL YELLING) 1936 01:06:02,891 --> 01:06:05,492 (GASPING) 1937 01:06:05,494 --> 01:06:06,226 Shit! 1938 01:06:06,228 --> 01:06:07,894 - (BONES CRACKING) - (GROANS) 1939 01:06:07,896 --> 01:06:09,095 Oh, God! 1940 01:06:09,097 --> 01:06:10,496 Oh, Teddy! 1941 01:06:10,498 --> 01:06:12,598 - Oh, why'd I listen to you? - Shit. 1942 01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:14,032 You were so convincing! 1943 01:06:14,034 --> 01:06:16,402 - I'm sorry, buddy. - Hey. 1944 01:06:16,404 --> 01:06:17,937 My arm's kind of tingly. 1945 01:06:17,939 --> 01:06:19,906 - I think I might have hurt it. - (REPRESSED GAGGING) 1946 01:06:19,908 --> 01:06:21,573 Feels weird, man. 1947 01:06:21,575 --> 01:06:23,344 His damn shoulder is in his mouth. 1948 01:06:24,879 --> 01:06:26,413 (SCREAMS) 1949 01:06:29,618 --> 01:06:30,683 Oh! 1950 01:06:30,685 --> 01:06:32,051 JAYLEN: Hey. 1951 01:06:32,053 --> 01:06:33,819 Big Mac, man, I'm sorry about that. 1952 01:06:33,821 --> 01:06:36,922 That hot chicken, it just kind of got on rewind, man. 1953 01:06:36,924 --> 01:06:38,625 - (WHIMPERS) - It was either the back or the front, 1954 01:06:38,627 --> 01:06:40,593 and I just got these pants, fam. 1955 01:06:40,595 --> 01:06:43,765 Oh, God, I'm having the worst night! 1956 01:06:46,134 --> 01:06:47,768 (DOOR OPENS) 1957 01:06:50,872 --> 01:06:52,739 (DOOR CLOSES) 1958 01:06:52,741 --> 01:06:54,675 ♪ 1959 01:06:59,947 --> 01:07:01,914 (GASPS, GRUNTS) 1960 01:07:01,916 --> 01:07:04,416 Hello, Teddy. 1961 01:07:04,418 --> 01:07:05,854 Huh? 1962 01:07:08,389 --> 01:07:09,922 Hey, babe. 1963 01:07:09,924 --> 01:07:12,424 You don't need to "hey, babe" me. 1964 01:07:12,426 --> 01:07:14,028 (GULPS) 1965 01:07:15,664 --> 01:07:17,464 I know what's going on. 1966 01:07:19,533 --> 01:07:20,467 What's, uh, um... 1967 01:07:21,569 --> 01:07:22,570 What's going on? 1968 01:07:24,104 --> 01:07:25,904 The late hours? 1969 01:07:25,906 --> 01:07:27,408 The secrecy? 1970 01:07:28,742 --> 01:07:30,176 Just admit it, Teddy. 1971 01:07:30,178 --> 01:07:31,810 Just admit what? 1972 01:07:31,812 --> 01:07:32,947 It's so obvious. 1973 01:07:35,082 --> 01:07:36,650 You're getting cold feet. 1974 01:07:37,785 --> 01:07:39,420 (SIGHS) 1975 01:07:40,588 --> 01:07:41,789 (LAUGHING) 1976 01:07:43,557 --> 01:07:45,593 Yeah! 1977 01:07:46,694 --> 01:07:47,993 Cold feet? 1978 01:07:47,995 --> 01:07:50,864 Ever since you proposed, you haven't been yourself. 1979 01:07:50,866 --> 01:07:52,497 (CLEARS THROAT) Cold feet? 1980 01:07:52,499 --> 01:07:56,935 Lisa, I am not getting cold feet. 1981 01:07:56,937 --> 01:07:59,671 In fact, it's the... it's the complete opposite. 1982 01:07:59,673 --> 01:08:01,006 My feet are very warm. 1983 01:08:01,008 --> 01:08:02,942 I want this. 1984 01:08:02,944 --> 01:08:04,443 And I apologize. 1985 01:08:04,445 --> 01:08:05,911 I apologize if things have been 1986 01:08:05,913 --> 01:08:08,447 a little crazy as of late, but, babe, 1987 01:08:08,449 --> 01:08:10,148 you gotta know that I am out here. 1988 01:08:10,150 --> 01:08:12,117 I'm-I'm... I'm trying. 1989 01:08:12,119 --> 01:08:16,655 Okay? I am busting my ass every day, every night, 1990 01:08:16,657 --> 01:08:18,191 for us. 1991 01:08:18,193 --> 01:08:20,158 For me and you. 1992 01:08:20,160 --> 01:08:22,027 I'm in a different world out there, babe. 1993 01:08:22,029 --> 01:08:24,796 And this world is stressing me out. 1994 01:08:24,798 --> 01:08:28,734 It is stressing me out. 1995 01:08:28,736 --> 01:08:29,935 (SIGHS) 1996 01:08:29,937 --> 01:08:31,603 I'm sorry I doubted you. 1997 01:08:31,605 --> 01:08:34,006 I-I know this career change has been a lot. 1998 01:08:34,008 --> 01:08:36,041 It's a lot. 1999 01:08:36,043 --> 01:08:38,744 It's so much. 2000 01:08:38,746 --> 01:08:41,046 It's so, so much. 2001 01:08:41,048 --> 01:08:42,883 Poor baby. 2002 01:08:44,251 --> 01:08:47,152 (TAKES DEEP BREATH) 2003 01:08:47,154 --> 01:08:48,454 - I love you. - Oh. 2004 01:08:53,060 --> 01:08:54,862 I love you, too. 2005 01:08:57,698 --> 01:08:59,264 TEDDY: Does that complete your order? 2006 01:08:59,266 --> 01:09:01,066 - (BABY CRYING OVER SPEAKER) - WOMAN: Oh, wait, h-hold up. 2007 01:09:01,068 --> 01:09:02,267 - I don't want that apple pie. - Yeah, I can't... I'm sorry. 2008 01:09:02,269 --> 01:09:03,635 It's-it's kind of hard to hear you. 2009 01:09:03,637 --> 01:09:04,770 There's a baby in the background. 2010 01:09:04,772 --> 01:09:06,138 Baby, I said be quiet. Sit down! 2011 01:09:06,140 --> 01:09:07,739 Yeah, say-say it one more time for me. 2012 01:09:07,741 --> 01:09:09,207 - Say it... say it again. - Is that burger good or what? 2013 01:09:09,209 --> 01:09:11,076 TEDDY: Is there any way I can get you to respectfully 2014 01:09:11,078 --> 01:09:12,677 - shut that baby up? - What'd you say? 2015 01:09:12,679 --> 01:09:14,846 - Just pull up to the window, for the love... - Heck no! 2016 01:09:14,848 --> 01:09:16,615 Oh. Shit. 2017 01:09:16,617 --> 01:09:17,883 - Shit. - STEWART: It won't work. 2018 01:09:17,885 --> 01:09:19,084 I see you, Teddy. 2019 01:09:19,086 --> 01:09:20,584 It's not working. 2020 01:09:20,586 --> 01:09:23,654 Teddy Walker behind the soda machine. 2021 01:09:23,656 --> 01:09:24,989 - WOMAN: Hello? - Shit. 2022 01:09:24,991 --> 01:09:27,526 Teddy Walker. I see you looking at... 2023 01:09:27,528 --> 01:09:28,593 We're making eye contact right now. 2024 01:09:28,595 --> 01:09:30,262 Open your eyes, Teddy. 2025 01:09:30,264 --> 01:09:32,697 - Teddy, come here! - Stewart. 2026 01:09:32,699 --> 01:09:33,932 Hey. 2027 01:09:33,934 --> 01:09:35,067 Stewart, you were saying "Teddy"? 2028 01:09:35,069 --> 01:09:36,268 About ten times. 2029 01:09:36,270 --> 01:09:37,635 - Hey. - Hey. 2030 01:09:37,637 --> 01:09:38,637 - Do me a favor. - Yep. 2031 01:09:38,639 --> 01:09:40,539 Uh, go over there and handle that situation 2032 01:09:40,541 --> 01:09:41,472 - at the drive-through. - Uh-huh. 2033 01:09:41,474 --> 01:09:42,975 And I'll tell you what to do after that, 2034 01:09:42,977 --> 01:09:44,042 because I'm in charge. 2035 01:09:44,044 --> 01:09:45,743 - Hey, so... - WOMAN: Hello? 2036 01:09:45,745 --> 01:09:47,545 Give me a second. M-Ma'am... 2037 01:09:47,547 --> 01:09:49,013 - I said I didn't want the pie. - Okay, ma'am, ma... 2038 01:09:49,015 --> 01:09:49,947 - She don't want the pie. - Uh-uh. 2039 01:09:49,949 --> 01:09:51,850 Take the pie off. She want to get the... 2040 01:09:51,852 --> 01:09:53,151 WOMAN: I said I ain't getting a pie. 2041 01:09:53,153 --> 01:09:54,219 - TEDDY: Pull up! - You heard me. 2042 01:09:54,221 --> 01:09:55,686 - Pull up to the window! - All right. 2043 01:09:55,688 --> 01:09:57,022 TEDDY: When she pull up, tell me, 2044 01:09:57,024 --> 01:09:58,956 'cause I'm gonna come punch the baby in the face. 2045 01:09:58,958 --> 01:10:01,125 God don't see everything. Just let me know. 2046 01:10:01,127 --> 01:10:05,063 Hey, talk to me, man. How you doing? 2047 01:10:05,065 --> 01:10:07,065 You know, I thought it was the Woodbridge punks 2048 01:10:07,067 --> 01:10:09,800 that broke into the school, but now it all makes sense. 2049 01:10:09,802 --> 01:10:12,903 I found this 2050 01:10:12,905 --> 01:10:14,508 at the scene of the crime. 2051 01:10:15,876 --> 01:10:17,242 So, what'd you do, huh? 2052 01:10:17,244 --> 01:10:18,310 Break into my computer? 2053 01:10:18,312 --> 01:10:20,145 - (CHUCKLES) - Steal the midterm? 2054 01:10:20,147 --> 01:10:21,712 Being a little paranoid, aren't we, Stew? 2055 01:10:21,714 --> 01:10:23,315 - Am I? - Stewart, that's a plastic bag 2056 01:10:23,317 --> 01:10:25,649 with a chicken wrapper in it with the word "evidence" 2057 01:10:25,651 --> 01:10:28,053 written on it, which is probably in your handwriting. 2058 01:10:28,055 --> 01:10:31,123 It's not exactly a smoking gun, Stew. 2059 01:10:31,125 --> 01:10:33,158 It's just a coincidence, right? 2060 01:10:33,160 --> 01:10:34,259 Probably. 2061 01:10:34,261 --> 01:10:36,027 If you stole that test, 2062 01:10:36,029 --> 01:10:37,862 I will find out, Teddy. 2063 01:10:37,864 --> 01:10:40,832 I'm an honest man trying to make an honest living. 2064 01:10:40,834 --> 01:10:43,667 Teddy Walker does not cheat. 2065 01:10:43,669 --> 01:10:45,071 You cheated. 2066 01:10:46,973 --> 01:10:48,973 Every last one of you... 2067 01:10:48,975 --> 01:10:50,742 cheated. 2068 01:10:50,744 --> 01:10:52,877 Uh... whoa. 2069 01:10:52,879 --> 01:10:55,247 Carrie, those are very strong accusations. 2070 01:10:55,249 --> 01:10:57,382 For real. Like, what? 2071 01:10:57,384 --> 01:10:58,749 I'm offended. 2072 01:10:58,751 --> 01:11:00,918 Well, I'll take note of that, Teddy. 2073 01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:03,088 Which one of you want to own up to it? 2074 01:11:03,090 --> 01:11:04,755 I'm offended, too. 2075 01:11:04,757 --> 01:11:06,191 Bobby? 2076 01:11:06,193 --> 01:11:07,625 You a criminal. 2077 01:11:07,627 --> 01:11:08,726 You obviously not good at it. 2078 01:11:08,728 --> 01:11:10,027 That's why you in jail. 2079 01:11:10,029 --> 01:11:11,996 Did you orchestrate this whole thing? 2080 01:11:11,998 --> 01:11:14,732 I mean, why you gonna pick on me and profile me? 2081 01:11:14,734 --> 01:11:16,734 I'm the only one locked up here. 2082 01:11:16,736 --> 01:11:18,836 So, if I'm locked up in here, 2083 01:11:18,838 --> 01:11:21,372 how can I be out there stealing the test, Miss Carrie? 2084 01:11:21,374 --> 01:11:23,074 CARRIE: Oh, oh, wait a minute. 2085 01:11:23,076 --> 01:11:24,108 Y'all stole the test? 2086 01:11:24,110 --> 01:11:25,209 I'm not saying nothing. 2087 01:11:25,211 --> 01:11:26,311 I don't know nothing. 2088 01:11:26,313 --> 01:11:27,845 I don't know shit. 2089 01:11:27,847 --> 01:11:29,046 'Cause I never said nothing 2090 01:11:29,048 --> 01:11:30,648 about anybody stealing the test. 2091 01:11:30,650 --> 01:11:32,983 We're about to get to the truth. 2092 01:11:32,985 --> 01:11:34,952 Who stole the test? 2093 01:11:34,954 --> 01:11:36,719 Mac? 2094 01:11:36,721 --> 01:11:40,024 You want to explain to me how you got a perfect score? 2095 01:11:40,026 --> 01:11:41,426 Here's the thing, all right? 2096 01:11:41,428 --> 01:11:44,261 I know I didn't get a perfect score, 2097 01:11:44,263 --> 01:11:45,729 because I missed a few on purpose. 2098 01:11:45,731 --> 01:11:46,730 Oh, fudge. 2099 01:11:46,732 --> 01:11:48,365 (CARRIE CHUCKLES) 2100 01:11:48,367 --> 01:11:50,335 Thank you! 2101 01:11:50,337 --> 01:11:51,869 You's a snitch, Mac. 2102 01:11:51,871 --> 01:11:53,438 Snitches are bitches. 2103 01:11:53,440 --> 01:11:55,806 I don't like cheaters. 2104 01:11:55,808 --> 01:11:59,944 And I hate that I am teaching a room full of cheaters. 2105 01:11:59,946 --> 01:12:02,179 I don't like men that cheat. 2106 01:12:02,181 --> 01:12:03,814 I don't like women that cheat. 2107 01:12:03,816 --> 01:12:05,116 I don't even deal with politicians. 2108 01:12:05,118 --> 01:12:07,151 You know why? 'Cause they all cheaters. 2109 01:12:07,153 --> 01:12:08,786 I don't even eat Cheetos. 2110 01:12:08,788 --> 01:12:10,687 You know why? 'Cause it sound like "cheaters." 2111 01:12:10,689 --> 01:12:13,090 Plus that Cheeto dust will give you that Trump color. 2112 01:12:13,092 --> 01:12:15,159 - Yeah. - It's hard to get that Cheeto dust 2113 01:12:15,161 --> 01:12:17,027 off your hands. 2114 01:12:17,029 --> 01:12:18,896 It'll mess up your Girbauds. 2115 01:12:18,898 --> 01:12:20,798 You know, I liked you at first. 2116 01:12:20,800 --> 01:12:22,133 I'm done with all of y'all. 2117 01:12:22,135 --> 01:12:24,068 All of y'all can get up out my class. 2118 01:12:24,070 --> 01:12:25,402 - I'm done with y'all. - What? 2119 01:12:25,404 --> 01:12:27,204 Okay, Carrie, let me... I want to say something. 2120 01:12:27,206 --> 01:12:29,206 What about my GED? He's gonna drop out of high school. 2121 01:12:29,208 --> 01:12:31,408 If I don't get my GED, I'm going to prison. 2122 01:12:31,410 --> 01:12:32,810 I need this GED. 2123 01:12:32,812 --> 01:12:33,978 You need to keep your booty closed. 2124 01:12:33,980 --> 01:12:35,446 That's what you need to do. You in jail. 2125 01:12:35,448 --> 01:12:36,980 No, I need this GED. 2126 01:12:36,982 --> 01:12:38,181 We can't live on Randy's salary. 2127 01:12:38,183 --> 01:12:39,417 Please don't make me go home. 2128 01:12:39,419 --> 01:12:40,753 I hate my kids. 2129 01:12:41,821 --> 01:12:44,288 But I love being a mom. 2130 01:12:44,290 --> 01:12:46,756 I'm blessed. I'm so blessed. 2131 01:12:46,758 --> 01:12:48,392 LUIS: Carrie, please. 2132 01:12:48,394 --> 01:12:50,059 I cannot live a lifetime 2133 01:12:50,061 --> 01:12:52,129 of driving around drunks in a Corolla. 2134 01:12:52,131 --> 01:12:53,497 JAYLEN: Look, the last thing I want to do 2135 01:12:53,499 --> 01:12:55,232 is be cleaning the rooms at the Best Western. 2136 01:12:55,234 --> 01:12:56,433 Okay? 'Cause all that... 2137 01:12:56,435 --> 01:12:57,901 Especially them short-stay rooms, 2138 01:12:57,903 --> 01:12:59,470 'cause you know what that is, right? 2139 01:12:59,472 --> 01:13:01,505 That's just gonna be used condoms, soiled sheets. 2140 01:13:01,507 --> 01:13:03,376 Ain't that where you met your bottom bitch at? 2141 01:13:05,778 --> 01:13:07,744 You know Trina? 2142 01:13:07,746 --> 01:13:08,978 Mm-hmm. 2143 01:13:08,980 --> 01:13:10,414 She got a fat ass, too. 2144 01:13:10,416 --> 01:13:13,283 You know what? All of you got little sob stories, 2145 01:13:13,285 --> 01:13:14,985 but y'all should've thought about that 2146 01:13:14,987 --> 01:13:16,989 before you went and stole the test. 2147 01:13:19,258 --> 01:13:21,125 Just get the hell up out of my class. 2148 01:13:21,127 --> 01:13:24,761 (STUDENTS CLAMORING) 2149 01:13:24,763 --> 01:13:27,064 THERESA: It's not sob stories. No! 2150 01:13:27,066 --> 01:13:28,499 I'm-I'm the one who wants to get my life together. 2151 01:13:28,501 --> 01:13:30,267 Let-let-let me tell you something about Jay. 2152 01:13:30,269 --> 01:13:33,102 - (CLAMORING CONTINUES) - CARRIE: Get out! 2153 01:13:33,104 --> 01:13:35,439 Get out! Get out! 2154 01:13:35,441 --> 01:13:36,973 - All of y'all... - It was me. 2155 01:13:36,975 --> 01:13:38,074 - And I... Hey. - (CLAMORING STOPS) 2156 01:13:38,076 --> 01:13:39,912 It was me. 2157 01:13:42,281 --> 01:13:44,181 Shouldn't be mad at none of them. 2158 01:13:44,183 --> 01:13:45,982 I mean, yeah, they looked at the answers, 2159 01:13:45,984 --> 01:13:47,953 but they wouldn't have if I hadn't put it on their lap. 2160 01:13:49,354 --> 01:13:51,222 I take responsibility for it all. 2161 01:13:51,224 --> 01:13:53,224 I was the mastermind. I orchestrated the whole thing. 2162 01:13:53,226 --> 01:13:54,227 It was all me. 2163 01:13:55,328 --> 01:13:56,826 Thank you. 2164 01:13:56,828 --> 01:13:58,562 Thank you, Teddy. 2165 01:13:58,564 --> 01:14:00,897 I appreciate your honesty. 2166 01:14:00,899 --> 01:14:02,866 I'm just trying to do what's right, Carrie. 2167 01:14:02,868 --> 01:14:05,069 Now you can get the hell out of my class. 2168 01:14:05,071 --> 01:14:07,003 Huh? 2169 01:14:07,005 --> 01:14:08,938 Hit the road, Jack. 2170 01:14:08,940 --> 01:14:12,041 Don't let the doorknob hit you where the good Lord split you. 2171 01:14:12,043 --> 01:14:13,543 I thought that when I said all that stuff, 2172 01:14:13,545 --> 01:14:14,945 that you would listen to it. 2173 01:14:14,947 --> 01:14:16,113 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 2174 01:14:16,115 --> 01:14:17,414 You gets no second chances up in here. 2175 01:14:17,416 --> 01:14:18,582 Not with me no more. 2176 01:14:18,584 --> 01:14:20,417 Uh-uh. I ain't got your back no more. 2177 01:14:20,419 --> 01:14:22,852 - You don't even want to be here. - I do want to be here. 2178 01:14:22,854 --> 01:14:24,187 You don't even want to be here, Teddy. 2179 01:14:24,189 --> 01:14:26,223 - No. - And as for the rest of you, 2180 01:14:26,225 --> 01:14:27,924 I want you to think long and hard 2181 01:14:27,926 --> 01:14:30,394 about if you really want this. 2182 01:14:30,396 --> 01:14:32,128 (SIGHS) 2183 01:14:32,130 --> 01:14:34,199 Class dismissed. 2184 01:14:36,968 --> 01:14:38,369 "Find a solution for the..." 2185 01:14:38,371 --> 01:14:40,069 (CRYING): I don't know none of this shit. 2186 01:14:40,071 --> 01:14:41,070 I need you. 2187 01:14:41,072 --> 01:14:44,474 - I need your help. - Put your damn hand down. 2188 01:14:44,476 --> 01:14:46,276 I'm going to Rainbows before they close. 2189 01:14:46,278 --> 01:14:48,444 That's emotional shopping, Carrie. 2190 01:14:48,446 --> 01:14:50,147 It's Rainbows, motherfucker. 2191 01:14:50,149 --> 01:14:51,417 Shit is cheap. 2192 01:14:53,419 --> 01:14:56,052 (LONG SIGH) 2193 01:14:56,054 --> 01:14:58,421 Teddy, Teddy, Teddy. 2194 01:14:58,423 --> 01:15:00,922 You are stupid. 2195 01:15:00,924 --> 01:15:03,960 She didn't know what was going on until you admitted it. 2196 01:15:03,962 --> 01:15:05,396 We had her right up till the end, 2197 01:15:05,398 --> 01:15:08,431 and then Teddy, old brick head... 2198 01:15:08,433 --> 01:15:10,900 - (BOOK STRIKES MACKENZIE) - Oh, Teddy! 2199 01:15:10,902 --> 01:15:12,368 JAYLEN: You deserved that. 2200 01:15:12,370 --> 01:15:14,571 LISA: A school? 2201 01:15:14,573 --> 01:15:17,574 We've never taken on a project like that. 2202 01:15:17,576 --> 01:15:20,510 STEWART: Well, I am an outside-of-the-box thinker. 2203 01:15:20,512 --> 01:15:22,278 That's just who I am. 2204 01:15:22,280 --> 01:15:23,646 I think that if students are excited 2205 01:15:23,648 --> 01:15:25,148 about their environment, 2206 01:15:25,150 --> 01:15:27,083 they'll be excited about learning. 2207 01:15:27,085 --> 01:15:28,284 That makes total sense. 2208 01:15:28,286 --> 01:15:29,653 I know I would. 2209 01:15:29,655 --> 01:15:31,120 Well, I'm glad to hear it. 2210 01:15:31,122 --> 01:15:32,455 If you're interested, I'd love to give you 2211 01:15:32,457 --> 01:15:33,956 a tour of the school. 2212 01:15:33,958 --> 01:15:35,558 You could come by any day, or you know what, 2213 01:15:35,560 --> 01:15:37,125 you could even come after school. 2214 01:15:37,127 --> 01:15:40,098 We have several night programs as well. 2215 01:15:41,900 --> 01:15:44,334 - Hey. - Hey. 2216 01:15:44,336 --> 01:15:46,402 CARRIE (IN DISTANCE): Okay, show me what you got. 2217 01:15:46,404 --> 01:15:48,003 Show me what you got! 2218 01:15:48,005 --> 01:15:50,206 What you got for me? Come on. 2219 01:15:50,208 --> 01:15:52,141 Light up. What you got? 2220 01:15:52,143 --> 01:15:54,043 Oh, you killing me! 2221 01:15:54,045 --> 01:15:55,578 You won. Congratulations. 2222 01:15:55,580 --> 01:15:57,547 I'm proud of you, boo. 2223 01:15:57,549 --> 01:15:59,515 Now, it's not cool that you beat your teacher 2224 01:15:59,517 --> 01:16:01,517 at Texas hold 'em, but I like the way 2225 01:16:01,519 --> 01:16:04,020 you nailed down the calculations on the pot odds, 2226 01:16:04,022 --> 01:16:06,255 so I'm gonna let this slide. 2227 01:16:06,257 --> 01:16:08,291 Now, remember what I said. 2228 01:16:08,293 --> 01:16:11,093 There are no shortcuts. You gotta work your butt off. 2229 01:16:11,095 --> 01:16:13,128 Okay? Give me some love. 2230 01:16:13,130 --> 01:16:15,465 Mmm. So proud of you. 2231 01:16:15,467 --> 01:16:17,200 Go on and have a good day, now. 2232 01:16:17,202 --> 01:16:19,237 Maybe one day, I'll take you to Vegas. 2233 01:16:21,706 --> 01:16:23,508 (SIGHS) 2234 01:16:26,311 --> 01:16:27,512 That was cool. 2235 01:16:29,347 --> 01:16:32,047 You know, uh, this used to be the special ed classroom 2236 01:16:32,049 --> 01:16:33,316 when I went here. 2237 01:16:33,318 --> 01:16:34,950 It still is. 2238 01:16:34,952 --> 01:16:36,686 You teach special ed? 2239 01:16:36,688 --> 01:16:40,390 Special ed is one of my sections. 2240 01:16:40,392 --> 01:16:42,926 It's one of my favorites, actually. 2241 01:16:44,729 --> 01:16:48,296 You know, that kid reminds me a lot of myself. 2242 01:16:48,298 --> 01:16:49,699 (CHUCKLES) I couldn't do math for shit 2243 01:16:49,701 --> 01:16:51,401 when I was in school. 2244 01:16:51,403 --> 01:16:53,436 Difference is I didn't have a teacher like you 2245 01:16:53,438 --> 01:16:55,671 that was willing to stay behind and help me. 2246 01:16:55,673 --> 01:16:57,473 I know what you're doing, Teddy. 2247 01:16:57,475 --> 01:17:01,009 And I admit it was very cool of you 2248 01:17:01,011 --> 01:17:03,379 to take the fall for your classmates, 2249 01:17:03,381 --> 01:17:04,580 but you're a hustler. 2250 01:17:04,582 --> 01:17:07,350 Trying to skate by without doing the work. 2251 01:17:07,352 --> 01:17:09,151 You should know you can't hustle me. 2252 01:17:09,153 --> 01:17:10,152 I do. 2253 01:17:10,154 --> 01:17:12,688 Okay? I-I do know that. 2254 01:17:12,690 --> 01:17:14,991 And I promise you I'm done. 2255 01:17:14,993 --> 01:17:16,526 I'm not hustling no more. 2256 01:17:16,528 --> 01:17:19,529 Night school is about second chances. 2257 01:17:19,531 --> 01:17:21,329 And if I don't get this second chance, 2258 01:17:21,331 --> 01:17:22,698 then it's over for me. 2259 01:17:22,700 --> 01:17:25,233 Night school is all that I have. 2260 01:17:25,235 --> 01:17:27,370 (SIGHS) 2261 01:17:27,372 --> 01:17:29,238 Please. 2262 01:17:29,240 --> 01:17:31,707 I'll consider it on one condition. 2263 01:17:31,709 --> 01:17:33,375 Whatever it is. 2264 01:17:33,377 --> 01:17:35,243 We get you tested. 2265 01:17:35,245 --> 01:17:37,581 For STDs? That's not an issue. 2266 01:17:39,083 --> 01:17:40,283 I don't mind that. I mean... 2267 01:17:40,285 --> 01:17:41,317 (SIGHS) Goddamn it. 2268 01:17:41,319 --> 01:17:43,051 There was one time where, uh, 2269 01:17:43,053 --> 01:17:44,754 the condom popped 'cause I put my balls inside of... 2270 01:17:44,756 --> 01:17:47,589 No, you idiot. 2271 01:17:47,591 --> 01:17:49,393 For learning disabilities. 2272 01:17:51,262 --> 01:17:54,397 Nobody cares about your escapades with your bitches. 2273 01:17:54,399 --> 01:17:56,599 TEDDY: So, what are the test results, 2274 01:17:56,601 --> 01:17:57,599 Carrie? 2275 01:17:57,601 --> 01:18:00,237 Teddy, the issue is... 2276 01:18:01,538 --> 01:18:03,475 ...you're clinically dumb. 2277 01:18:06,778 --> 01:18:08,510 I knew it. 2278 01:18:08,512 --> 01:18:11,112 I knew it was a mistake. I knew it was a mistake. 2279 01:18:11,114 --> 01:18:13,548 (LAUGHS) Boy, I'm sorry. I'm just messing with you. 2280 01:18:13,550 --> 01:18:15,183 - Come on, Carrie. - Look, look. 2281 01:18:15,185 --> 01:18:16,419 My suspicions were right, 2282 01:18:16,421 --> 01:18:19,421 and you, my friend, are dyslexic. 2283 01:18:19,423 --> 01:18:21,323 Okay. 2284 01:18:21,325 --> 01:18:23,325 Okay, so that just means I'm having problems 2285 01:18:23,327 --> 01:18:25,059 with my reading and my writing, right? 2286 01:18:25,061 --> 01:18:27,730 Yep, but you also have dyscalculia. 2287 01:18:27,732 --> 01:18:29,665 Discalcu... I don't even know how to pronounce that. 2288 01:18:29,667 --> 01:18:33,003 Basically, it's like dyslexia but with math. 2289 01:18:35,105 --> 01:18:36,538 That's what I got. 2290 01:18:36,540 --> 01:18:38,073 I knew it. 2291 01:18:38,075 --> 01:18:39,742 Now that you say it, it makes sense. 2292 01:18:39,744 --> 01:18:41,142 If you take me to a restaurant 2293 01:18:41,144 --> 01:18:42,377 and you say, "Teddy, leave the tip," 2294 01:18:42,379 --> 01:18:43,445 I'm-I'm all over the place. 2295 01:18:43,447 --> 01:18:44,613 That's exactly what it is. 2296 01:18:44,615 --> 01:18:46,448 - We did it. - Oh, we're not done. 2297 01:18:46,450 --> 01:18:48,783 You also have a processing disorder. 2298 01:18:48,785 --> 01:18:51,186 I got a touch of prostate cancer? 2299 01:18:51,188 --> 01:18:53,255 She didn't touch my ass one time. 2300 01:18:53,257 --> 01:18:55,257 I said "processing disorder." 2301 01:18:55,259 --> 01:18:57,526 Carrie, if you're not going to help me, 2302 01:18:57,528 --> 01:18:58,827 then we're wasting our time. 2303 01:18:58,829 --> 01:19:01,363 Explain to me what this stuff is. 2304 01:19:01,365 --> 01:19:02,598 If I got a proc... 2305 01:19:02,600 --> 01:19:03,701 Oh, my God. 2306 01:19:05,302 --> 01:19:07,271 I'm not processing it. 2307 01:19:08,739 --> 01:19:11,138 I didn't process none of that shit. 2308 01:19:11,140 --> 01:19:14,376 You are just one big, beautiful mixed drink 2309 01:19:14,378 --> 01:19:15,778 of learning disabilities. 2310 01:19:15,780 --> 01:19:17,412 So I'm not dumb? 2311 01:19:17,414 --> 01:19:19,447 Boy, I was just playing when I said that earlier. 2312 01:19:19,449 --> 01:19:22,350 No good teacher would ever call their students dumb. 2313 01:19:22,352 --> 01:19:23,852 Okay. 2314 01:19:23,854 --> 01:19:25,820 So, how do we fix it? Let's talk solution. 2315 01:19:25,822 --> 01:19:27,522 Well, there's no cure for what you have. 2316 01:19:27,524 --> 01:19:29,824 Oh, my God. 2317 01:19:29,826 --> 01:19:32,160 I got learning herpes? 2318 01:19:32,162 --> 01:19:33,562 Boy... 2319 01:19:33,564 --> 01:19:34,829 Oh, shit. 2320 01:19:34,831 --> 01:19:37,197 There is no such thing as learning herpes. 2321 01:19:37,199 --> 01:19:39,267 I'm blistering up. 2322 01:19:39,269 --> 01:19:41,436 It's 'cause I'm trying to think. 2323 01:19:41,438 --> 01:19:43,605 - Hey, Teddy! - Hey, Mac. 2324 01:19:43,607 --> 01:19:45,607 - Ringleader. - Hi, guys. 2325 01:19:45,609 --> 01:19:48,375 - Teddy! - Yeah, Teddy! Teddy! 2326 01:19:48,377 --> 01:19:50,211 Teaching the conventional way 2327 01:19:50,213 --> 01:19:53,148 just isn't gonna get it done for Teddy, 2328 01:19:53,150 --> 01:19:54,416 so we're gonna mix it up. 2329 01:19:54,418 --> 01:19:56,418 You out here getting it in. 2330 01:19:56,420 --> 01:19:58,653 What's going on, Carrie? Why you in here? 2331 01:19:58,655 --> 01:20:00,655 Why you in the ring? What's going on? 2332 01:20:00,657 --> 01:20:03,458 Teddy, your difficulties are focus-related. 2333 01:20:03,460 --> 01:20:04,359 Uh-huh. 2334 01:20:04,361 --> 01:20:06,328 My goal is to remove that mind chatter 2335 01:20:06,330 --> 01:20:09,497 so you can achieve properly unencumbered neural pathways. 2336 01:20:09,499 --> 01:20:10,865 And this isn't a ring. 2337 01:20:10,867 --> 01:20:12,333 It's a hexagon. 2338 01:20:12,335 --> 01:20:14,269 Huh. Oh, it is. 2339 01:20:14,271 --> 01:20:15,403 Yeah, well... 2340 01:20:15,405 --> 01:20:16,871 Why you taking your shoes off? 2341 01:20:16,873 --> 01:20:18,607 Is this somebody's carpet? 2342 01:20:18,609 --> 01:20:20,408 Teddy, what's the square root of 81? 2343 01:20:20,410 --> 01:20:21,576 What? 2344 01:20:21,578 --> 01:20:24,545 - (GRUNTS) - Ow! Ow! 2345 01:20:24,547 --> 01:20:27,215 - Shit! - What's the square root of 81? 2346 01:20:27,217 --> 01:20:29,284 I don't know. (GROANS) What you do...? 2347 01:20:29,286 --> 01:20:31,353 - Ow! Carrie! - What's the square root of 81? 2348 01:20:31,355 --> 01:20:32,353 You breaking my arm! 2349 01:20:32,355 --> 01:20:33,888 Come on, we're clearing those neural pathways. 2350 01:20:33,890 --> 01:20:35,656 - No! (SCREAMS) - Stop. Hey! 2351 01:20:35,658 --> 01:20:37,424 - What you doing? - Focus! 2352 01:20:37,426 --> 01:20:40,362 - (SCREAMS) - Square root! Focus! 2353 01:20:40,364 --> 01:20:41,663 I don't know! 2354 01:20:41,665 --> 01:20:44,331 - Oh, God! (SCREAMS) - (BONES CRACKING) 2355 01:20:44,333 --> 01:20:47,234 Concentrate. Teddy, concentrate. 2356 01:20:47,236 --> 01:20:48,569 Come on, Teddy, come on. 2357 01:20:48,571 --> 01:20:50,205 ♪ Na na na-na na na 2358 01:20:50,207 --> 01:20:52,807 ♪ Na na-na na na na-na na na-na... ♪ 2359 01:20:52,809 --> 01:20:54,776 How you feeling today, Teddy? 2360 01:20:54,778 --> 01:20:58,278 I'm-I'm feeling fine, Carrie, but I ain't feeling 2361 01:20:58,280 --> 01:21:00,347 this Mr. Miyagi shit, okay? 2362 01:21:00,349 --> 01:21:01,916 What's the capital of Belgium? 2363 01:21:01,918 --> 01:21:03,685 Uh... 2364 01:21:03,687 --> 01:21:04,719 waffles. 2365 01:21:04,721 --> 01:21:06,320 - What? (STOMPS FOOT) - Run! 2366 01:21:06,322 --> 01:21:07,656 - (GASPING, SCREAMING) - Don't you run from me. 2367 01:21:07,658 --> 01:21:09,590 - Don't you run from me. - Don't. He's so little. 2368 01:21:09,592 --> 01:21:12,459 - What is the capital of Belgium? - (GROANING) 2369 01:21:12,461 --> 01:21:14,496 I haven't eaten breakfast! I don't know! 2370 01:21:14,498 --> 01:21:16,931 - That is not the answer! - (SCREAMS, GROANS) 2371 01:21:16,933 --> 01:21:18,298 Pretend you're dead. 2372 01:21:18,300 --> 01:21:20,701 - Oh! Oh! (SCREAMS) - Get back here! 2373 01:21:20,703 --> 01:21:22,636 Teddy, focus. 2374 01:21:22,638 --> 01:21:24,872 - Concentrate. - Let's do it. 2375 01:21:24,874 --> 01:21:27,409 ♪ Ooh, tell you all my deepest, darkest secrets... ♪ 2376 01:21:27,411 --> 01:21:29,911 Water is comprised of...? 2377 01:21:29,913 --> 01:21:31,512 Let's go, Teddy. You got this, Teddy. 2378 01:21:31,514 --> 01:21:33,547 - Rain. - "Rain." 2379 01:21:33,549 --> 01:21:35,349 TEDDY: Wait, no. Wait, wait. (GRUNTS) 2380 01:21:35,351 --> 01:21:37,484 I know it, I know it. Um... 2381 01:21:37,486 --> 01:21:38,953 - Think. - (STAMMERING) 2382 01:21:38,955 --> 01:21:40,889 - Focus! - Um... helium. 2383 01:21:40,891 --> 01:21:42,423 No. No, no, no. 2384 01:21:42,425 --> 01:21:44,591 Nitrogen. It's nitrogen, right? 2385 01:21:44,593 --> 01:21:46,493 - You better get it right. - It's a gas. 2386 01:21:46,495 --> 01:21:48,595 - What? - It's a gas! (GRUNTS) 2387 01:21:48,597 --> 01:21:50,667 (SCREAMING) 2388 01:21:52,803 --> 01:21:54,268 Jesus Christ! 2389 01:21:54,270 --> 01:21:55,269 Give me the answer! 2390 01:21:55,271 --> 01:21:56,570 - Say it! - (SCREAMING) 2391 01:21:56,572 --> 01:21:57,571 Give me the damn answer. 2392 01:21:57,573 --> 01:21:58,839 Tell me! 2393 01:21:58,841 --> 01:22:00,040 It's two part hydrogen, 2394 01:22:00,042 --> 01:22:01,976 one part... one... 2395 01:22:01,978 --> 01:22:03,310 one part oxygen. 2396 01:22:03,312 --> 01:22:05,446 - Yes! - Say that again. 2397 01:22:05,448 --> 01:22:06,647 He said it. Don't make him say it again. 2398 01:22:06,649 --> 01:22:07,881 I said two part hydrogen, 2399 01:22:07,883 --> 01:22:09,983 one part oxygen. 2400 01:22:09,985 --> 01:22:10,984 (LAUGHING) 2401 01:22:10,986 --> 01:22:12,019 Teddy, that's right. 2402 01:22:12,021 --> 01:22:13,487 - You got it right. - What? 2403 01:22:13,489 --> 01:22:14,689 That's the correct answer. 2404 01:22:14,691 --> 01:22:16,590 (GASPS) I got it right. 2405 01:22:16,592 --> 01:22:17,792 You got it right, Teddy. 2406 01:22:17,794 --> 01:22:19,560 (CHUCKLING): Yeah. Yes. 2407 01:22:19,562 --> 01:22:20,828 Yes! 2408 01:22:20,830 --> 01:22:22,730 What a big day for all of us. 2409 01:22:22,732 --> 01:22:23,931 I can't believe that I actually... 2410 01:22:23,933 --> 01:22:25,800 (GRUNTS) What? 2411 01:22:25,802 --> 01:22:27,035 (SNIFFS) 2412 01:22:27,037 --> 01:22:28,970 What is that smell? What is that? 2413 01:22:28,972 --> 01:22:31,905 Oh, now, that's a gas. 2414 01:22:31,907 --> 01:22:34,308 You bust ass in my face, Car...? 2415 01:22:34,310 --> 01:22:35,809 Methane. 2416 01:22:35,811 --> 01:22:37,044 It's in my mouth. 2417 01:22:37,046 --> 01:22:39,047 You got my lips all chapped and shit. 2418 01:22:39,049 --> 01:22:40,614 This ain't no type of education. 2419 01:22:40,616 --> 01:22:42,316 This is chemical warfare. 2420 01:22:42,318 --> 01:22:44,485 (SNORING) 2421 01:22:44,487 --> 01:22:46,653 LUIS: AirDrop it to you. 2422 01:22:46,655 --> 01:22:49,924 - TEDDY: Yeah. - (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 2423 01:22:49,926 --> 01:22:51,893 (SNIFFLING) 2424 01:22:51,895 --> 01:22:53,927 - (SOBBING) - Theresa, what's wrong? 2425 01:22:53,929 --> 01:22:55,496 Oh... 2426 01:22:55,498 --> 01:22:57,064 I just... this all went so fast. 2427 01:22:57,066 --> 01:22:58,766 I don't want school to end. 2428 01:22:58,768 --> 01:23:00,067 (CHUCKLING): Okay. 2429 01:23:00,069 --> 01:23:02,436 Well, you can come to college with me. 2430 01:23:02,438 --> 01:23:04,705 - What? You're going? - Mm-hmm. 2431 01:23:04,707 --> 01:23:06,707 - I'm so happy for you. - (CHUCKLING) 2432 01:23:06,709 --> 01:23:08,408 When did you decide? 2433 01:23:08,410 --> 01:23:09,610 Well, don't take this the wrong way, 2434 01:23:09,612 --> 01:23:12,378 but hanging out with you guys scared the shit out of me. 2435 01:23:12,380 --> 01:23:14,548 So I think I'm gonna... I think I'm gonna 2436 01:23:14,550 --> 01:23:15,649 do something with my life. 2437 01:23:15,651 --> 01:23:17,118 That's wonderful. 2438 01:23:17,120 --> 01:23:19,887 I can just see you now in the cutest outfit... 2439 01:23:19,889 --> 01:23:21,889 little miniskirt... walking through the quad. 2440 01:23:21,891 --> 01:23:23,757 You're clutching onto your philosophy thesis. 2441 01:23:23,759 --> 01:23:26,393 But when you get to class, the professor is blown away 2442 01:23:26,395 --> 01:23:27,694 - by how brilliant it is. - Yeah. 2443 01:23:27,696 --> 01:23:29,429 So he grabs onto you, and you can 2444 01:23:29,431 --> 01:23:30,731 feel him up against your thigh. 2445 01:23:30,733 --> 01:23:32,432 - Uh... - Not in a sexual way, 2446 01:23:32,434 --> 01:23:34,367 but not not in a sexual way, you know? 2447 01:23:34,369 --> 01:23:36,702 And he looks strangely like Bruno Mars. 2448 01:23:36,704 --> 01:23:37,939 Even though he's super academic, 2449 01:23:37,941 --> 01:23:39,540 he wears, like, pink blazers sometimes. 2450 01:23:39,542 --> 01:23:42,042 Well, you can still go to college and do... 2451 01:23:42,044 --> 01:23:43,646 that other stuff. 2452 01:23:44,747 --> 01:23:46,013 Me? College? 2453 01:23:46,015 --> 01:23:47,613 Oh, no. Randy wouldn't let me. 2454 01:23:47,615 --> 01:23:50,484 Screw Randy. You can do whatever you want to do. 2455 01:23:50,486 --> 01:23:51,418 You don't know Randy. 2456 01:23:51,420 --> 01:23:53,153 Why can't you just be like, "Hey, Randy. 2457 01:23:53,155 --> 01:23:55,556 I want to do this. Deal with it." 2458 01:23:55,558 --> 01:23:57,057 CARRIE (FROM HALL): Okay! 2459 01:23:57,059 --> 01:23:59,458 Night school people. 2460 01:23:59,460 --> 01:24:02,996 Last class, final demonstration. 2461 01:24:02,998 --> 01:24:04,765 Carrie, please, no more learning. 2462 01:24:04,767 --> 01:24:05,966 My brain is at capacity. 2463 01:24:05,968 --> 01:24:07,634 I want to be a dental hy-enist, 2464 01:24:07,636 --> 01:24:09,502 not Elon Musk or Stephen Hawking. 2465 01:24:09,504 --> 01:24:10,703 (CHUCKLES) Well, okay, Luis. 2466 01:24:10,705 --> 01:24:11,939 I'm right there with you. 2467 01:24:11,941 --> 01:24:12,972 Ha! 2468 01:24:12,974 --> 01:24:14,508 - Oh, no. - (CARRIE LAUGHING) 2469 01:24:14,510 --> 01:24:16,410 Is this another science experiment? 2470 01:24:16,412 --> 01:24:19,646 Oh, no, this is a celebration, Big Mac. 2471 01:24:19,648 --> 01:24:21,547 - (WHOOPING) - Oh, yeah. You guys been 2472 01:24:21,549 --> 01:24:23,150 - working your asses off. - (ALL EXCLAIMING) 2473 01:24:23,152 --> 01:24:25,152 - (LAUGHTER) - Hey! - Shit! 2474 01:24:25,154 --> 01:24:26,920 Oh, I'm so sorry, Bobby. 2475 01:24:26,922 --> 01:24:28,689 No, that's cool. I'm gonna make me 2476 01:24:28,691 --> 01:24:30,657 some toilet punch after lockdown, baby. 2477 01:24:30,659 --> 01:24:32,692 - (MUFFLED DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) - Y'all-y'all hear that music? 2478 01:24:32,694 --> 01:24:33,927 - Yeah. - Oh, yeah. 2479 01:24:33,929 --> 01:24:36,129 Oh, you know what, it's prom night. 2480 01:24:36,131 --> 01:24:37,197 You guys go to prom? 2481 01:24:37,199 --> 01:24:39,166 - No, I was in juvie. - Really? 2482 01:24:39,168 --> 01:24:40,667 I was home with an infant. 2483 01:24:40,669 --> 01:24:42,535 This is a sign, guys. 2484 01:24:42,537 --> 01:24:44,637 - What? - Yeah, we've been working hard. 2485 01:24:44,639 --> 01:24:45,973 We should let some steam off. 2486 01:24:45,975 --> 01:24:47,807 Why don't we go to the prom? 2487 01:24:47,809 --> 01:24:49,610 You know what? Class dismissed. 2488 01:24:49,612 --> 01:24:50,944 Let's go shake that ass. 2489 01:24:50,946 --> 01:24:52,813 (ALL CHEERING) 2490 01:24:52,815 --> 01:24:55,481 Let's go to prom, baby! Let's go to prom! 2491 01:24:55,483 --> 01:24:56,849 (LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER) 2492 01:24:56,851 --> 01:24:58,618 Oh, my God! 2493 01:24:58,620 --> 01:25:00,519 ♪ Just a slave to the game, I'm like a bird... ♪ 2494 01:25:00,521 --> 01:25:01,555 What the hell, Theresa? 2495 01:25:01,557 --> 01:25:02,990 I've been outside honking 2496 01:25:02,992 --> 01:25:04,658 for like 15 minutes. 2497 01:25:04,660 --> 01:25:08,161 ♪ I feel like I can break through the ceiling ♪ 2498 01:25:08,163 --> 01:25:11,664 ♪ So I find myself a place without missing a beat ♪ 2499 01:25:11,666 --> 01:25:13,165 ♪ Where they buy me a drink 2500 01:25:13,167 --> 01:25:15,534 ♪ A place where I can dance like I'm free ♪ 2501 01:25:15,536 --> 01:25:17,070 Don't talk to me like that. 2502 01:25:17,072 --> 01:25:18,238 ♪ I'll dance until these chains fall... ♪ 2503 01:25:18,240 --> 01:25:19,939 I'm your wife. I'm not your mommy, 2504 01:25:19,941 --> 01:25:21,707 and I'm not your house cleaner. 2505 01:25:21,709 --> 01:25:24,243 And when I get my GED, I'm gonna pursue my dreams, 2506 01:25:24,245 --> 01:25:26,479 and I'm gonna need your support. 2507 01:25:26,481 --> 01:25:29,182 And also, I want to have sex on a regular basis. 2508 01:25:29,184 --> 01:25:30,650 - Oh. - Mmm! - (RANDY CHUCKLES) 2509 01:25:30,652 --> 01:25:31,951 I mean, like, kinky sex. 2510 01:25:31,953 --> 01:25:33,220 Like, not make-a-baby sex, 2511 01:25:33,222 --> 01:25:34,787 but 45-minute sex. 2512 01:25:34,789 --> 01:25:36,155 Like, Fifty Shades of Grey sex. 2513 01:25:36,157 --> 01:25:37,256 Hmm? 2514 01:25:37,258 --> 01:25:39,760 THERESA: I want you to crack my butt like a walnut. 2515 01:25:39,762 --> 01:25:40,961 Do I make myself clear?! 2516 01:25:40,963 --> 01:25:42,728 Okay, okay. 2517 01:25:42,730 --> 01:25:44,231 I'm so sorry, babe. 2518 01:25:44,233 --> 01:25:46,565 I think you're a freakin' rock star. 2519 01:25:46,567 --> 01:25:48,668 And judging by what you just said to me, 2520 01:25:48,670 --> 01:25:50,636 I can't wait to be your porn star. 2521 01:25:50,638 --> 01:25:51,939 Whoa. 2522 01:25:51,941 --> 01:25:53,839 (CHUCKLES QUIETLY) 2523 01:25:53,841 --> 01:25:55,107 - (DANCE MUSIC BLARING) - CARRIE: All right, y'all, 2524 01:25:55,109 --> 01:25:56,611 we got the party up in here tonight! 2525 01:25:58,012 --> 01:25:59,845 That's a clean batch. 2526 01:25:59,847 --> 01:26:02,115 I want this punch to stay that way. 2527 01:26:02,117 --> 01:26:04,884 Gonna be checking throughout the night. 2528 01:26:04,886 --> 01:26:06,619 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 2529 01:26:06,621 --> 01:26:09,121 Excuse me. This dance is for students only. 2530 01:26:09,123 --> 01:26:10,923 Well, this is my night school class, 2531 01:26:10,925 --> 01:26:12,624 and they are students here. 2532 01:26:12,626 --> 01:26:13,894 Okay, well, technically, technically, you're still 2533 01:26:13,896 --> 01:26:15,095 on school hours, so, Miss Carter, 2534 01:26:15,097 --> 01:26:16,296 please return to your classroom. 2535 01:26:16,298 --> 01:26:18,097 Well, we gonna spend our class hours 2536 01:26:18,099 --> 01:26:19,999 - in the gym, at the party. - Carrie. 2537 01:26:20,001 --> 01:26:21,734 So get out of the way, bitch. Move! 2538 01:26:21,736 --> 01:26:23,635 - I can't allow this. - She got you. She got you. 2539 01:26:23,637 --> 01:26:25,071 Man, why you always about that rah-rah, man? 2540 01:26:25,073 --> 01:26:26,706 I'll allow this. I'll allow this to happen. 2541 01:26:26,708 --> 01:26:28,208 We just trying to get a vibe, though. 2542 01:26:28,210 --> 01:26:29,608 (GIGGLES QUIETLY) 2543 01:26:29,610 --> 01:26:30,943 TEDDY: All right, Piedmont High, 2544 01:26:30,945 --> 01:26:32,712 make room for the night school crew! 2545 01:26:32,714 --> 01:26:34,080 ♪ One, two, three, uh! 2546 01:26:34,082 --> 01:26:36,015 ♪ My baby don't mess around... ♪ 2547 01:26:36,017 --> 01:26:37,883 Watch out, watch out, watch out! 2548 01:26:37,885 --> 01:26:40,019 ♪ And this I know for sure 2549 01:26:40,021 --> 01:26:41,053 Everybody, come on! 2550 01:26:41,055 --> 01:26:42,888 ♪ Uh! 2551 01:26:42,890 --> 01:26:46,092 ♪ Thank God for Mom and Dad for sticking to together... ♪ 2552 01:26:46,094 --> 01:26:47,728 JAYLEN: Oh, Miss C gonna kill 'em! 2553 01:26:49,597 --> 01:26:50,730 ♪ Yeah! Huh! 2554 01:26:50,732 --> 01:26:52,932 ♪ Hey ya 2555 01:26:52,934 --> 01:26:53,968 Yeah! 2556 01:26:55,737 --> 01:26:58,871 ♪ Hey ya 2557 01:26:58,873 --> 01:27:00,707 - ♪ Hey ya - Pelvic, pelvic, pelvic. 2558 01:27:03,278 --> 01:27:06,846 - ♪ Hey ya - (WHOOPING) 2559 01:27:06,848 --> 01:27:08,814 ♪ Here we go, uh, shake it, shake-shake it ♪ 2560 01:27:08,816 --> 01:27:10,316 - ♪ Shake it, shake-shake it - ♪ Oh, oh 2561 01:27:10,318 --> 01:27:11,384 ♪ Shake it, shake-shake it 2562 01:27:11,386 --> 01:27:14,887 ♪ Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it like ♪ 2563 01:27:14,889 --> 01:27:16,589 - ♪ A Polaroid picture - ♪ You know what to do 2564 01:27:16,591 --> 01:27:17,857 ♪ Shake it, shake it, shake it ♪ 2565 01:27:17,859 --> 01:27:20,026 - ♪ You know what to do - (YELLS) 2566 01:27:20,028 --> 01:27:22,328 ♪ Shake it, shake it, sh-sh-shake it ♪ 2567 01:27:22,330 --> 01:27:24,230 ♪ You know what to do 2568 01:27:24,232 --> 01:27:25,865 ♪ Hey ya 2569 01:27:25,867 --> 01:27:28,667 ♪ Oh, oh 2570 01:27:28,669 --> 01:27:30,069 - ♪ Hey ya - Go, Theresa! 2571 01:27:30,071 --> 01:27:31,771 - (CHEERING) - ♪ Oh, oh 2572 01:27:31,773 --> 01:27:34,073 ♪ Hey ya 2573 01:27:34,075 --> 01:27:36,342 - ♪ Oh, oh ♪ - She's twerking! She's twerking! 2574 01:27:36,344 --> 01:27:38,778 - ♪ Hey ya - She's twerking! 2575 01:27:38,780 --> 01:27:40,646 - Go, T! - Crack my walnut! 2576 01:27:40,648 --> 01:27:42,647 - (WHOOPING) - That's not for kids, Theresa! 2577 01:27:42,649 --> 01:27:44,383 - ♪ Oh, oh - Go, T! 2578 01:27:44,385 --> 01:27:46,918 - ♪ Hey ya... - (SONG FADES) 2579 01:27:46,920 --> 01:27:49,722 (SLOW BALLAD PLAYING) 2580 01:27:49,724 --> 01:27:52,758 ♪ Ooh, ooh 2581 01:27:52,760 --> 01:27:56,962 ♪ Oh, oh 2582 01:27:56,964 --> 01:27:59,931 ♪ Hey, hey 2583 01:27:59,933 --> 01:28:03,002 ♪ The dream is all that keeps me alive ♪ 2584 01:28:03,004 --> 01:28:05,805 (SINGS LINE IN SPANISH) 2585 01:28:05,807 --> 01:28:07,373 ♪ No matter what it takes 2586 01:28:07,375 --> 01:28:10,276 ♪ You know I'm always gonna keep on fighting ♪ 2587 01:28:10,278 --> 01:28:11,845 ♪ I'm fighting 2588 01:28:13,748 --> 01:28:16,182 ♪ I'm never gonna let the dream go ♪ 2589 01:28:16,184 --> 01:28:19,285 ♪ I'll take this all the way 2590 01:28:19,287 --> 01:28:23,322 ♪ Nobody's ever, ever gonna stop el sueño ♪ 2591 01:28:23,324 --> 01:28:25,658 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 2592 01:28:25,660 --> 01:28:29,028 ♪ No desert, no snake gonna take me down ♪ 2593 01:28:29,030 --> 01:28:31,896 - ♪ Take me down - ♪ Take me down, no way... ♪ 2594 01:28:31,898 --> 01:28:34,400 Wait, s-sweetheart, who-who's watching the kids? 2595 01:28:34,402 --> 01:28:36,301 I got it covered. 2596 01:28:36,303 --> 01:28:39,105 She said, "I want to be a flight attendant." 2597 01:28:39,107 --> 01:28:41,006 You see? 2598 01:28:41,008 --> 01:28:43,975 "I want to go from place to place. 2599 01:28:43,977 --> 01:28:46,345 It'd be like going..." 2600 01:28:46,347 --> 01:28:48,615 Is y'all little bitches listening? 2601 01:28:50,017 --> 01:28:53,185 You know, Carrie, you are incredible. 2602 01:28:53,187 --> 01:28:54,953 I'm serious. 2603 01:28:54,955 --> 01:28:55,854 There's never been a teacher 2604 01:28:55,856 --> 01:28:57,889 that believe in me the way that you do. 2605 01:28:57,891 --> 01:28:59,724 Teddy, what can I say? 2606 01:28:59,726 --> 01:29:03,129 You've grown so much in such a short period of time. 2607 01:29:03,131 --> 01:29:05,030 And if you keep up with all the stuff 2608 01:29:05,032 --> 01:29:08,166 that we've been doing, you are well on your way. 2609 01:29:08,168 --> 01:29:10,034 I'm just... 2610 01:29:10,036 --> 01:29:12,370 I'm really, really proud of you. 2611 01:29:12,372 --> 01:29:15,143 (LUIS SINGING IN SPANISH) 2612 01:29:19,146 --> 01:29:21,946 You know, Carrie, uh... 2613 01:29:21,948 --> 01:29:25,250 these past few weeks have been amazing. 2614 01:29:25,252 --> 01:29:27,852 I mean, our chemistry, it goes without saying, 2615 01:29:27,854 --> 01:29:28,920 it's strong. 2616 01:29:28,922 --> 01:29:30,855 I sense it. I know you do, too. 2617 01:29:30,857 --> 01:29:32,123 But as magical as these moments 2618 01:29:32,125 --> 01:29:33,224 that we've been having may be... 2619 01:29:33,226 --> 01:29:35,126 Fool, I'm gay. 2620 01:29:35,128 --> 01:29:36,727 I'm not trying to play. 2621 01:29:36,729 --> 01:29:38,063 Now, I'm not saying I ain't no freak, 2622 01:29:38,065 --> 01:29:39,265 'cause I'd drop it off on you. 2623 01:29:39,267 --> 01:29:40,499 I'm a lesbian. 2624 01:29:40,501 --> 01:29:43,768 If you want to pursue acting, you can. 2625 01:29:43,770 --> 01:29:45,103 No, I'm gay. 2626 01:29:45,105 --> 01:29:46,771 Say that again. It sound like you said you're gay. 2627 01:29:46,773 --> 01:29:48,239 I'm gay. 2628 01:29:48,241 --> 01:29:50,409 I like women. 2629 01:29:50,411 --> 01:29:51,943 Are you sure? Because I'm getting 2630 01:29:51,945 --> 01:29:53,479 - a whole different vibe. - MAYA: Oh, hell no! 2631 01:29:53,481 --> 01:29:55,715 - I'm pretty sure. - Oh, God. 2632 01:29:57,117 --> 01:29:59,184 Teddy? 2633 01:29:59,186 --> 01:30:02,087 Is the, is the one on the left your type? 2634 01:30:02,089 --> 01:30:03,821 Uh-uh, the one in the tight dress is. 2635 01:30:03,823 --> 01:30:05,025 Shit, that's mine. 2636 01:30:06,092 --> 01:30:07,892 Hey. 2637 01:30:07,894 --> 01:30:09,894 There they go. 2638 01:30:09,896 --> 01:30:11,362 What are you doing here? 2639 01:30:11,364 --> 01:30:13,198 Huh? 2640 01:30:13,200 --> 01:30:15,166 What are you doing at a high school prom? 2641 01:30:15,168 --> 01:30:17,835 What, uh... what-what are you doing here, babe? 2642 01:30:17,837 --> 01:30:20,271 Why you... why you here? 2643 01:30:20,273 --> 01:30:21,372 Principal Patowsky is interested in us 2644 01:30:21,374 --> 01:30:23,807 redesigning the school, so he asked us to stop by... 2645 01:30:23,809 --> 01:30:25,010 Oh, he did, huh? 2646 01:30:26,447 --> 01:30:28,313 Well played, Stewart. 2647 01:30:28,315 --> 01:30:30,448 You two know each other? 2648 01:30:30,450 --> 01:30:32,383 Ask Stewart. 2649 01:30:32,385 --> 01:30:34,452 Uh, yes, we went to high school together. 2650 01:30:34,454 --> 01:30:37,187 I think I mentioned that at our first meeting. 2651 01:30:37,189 --> 01:30:39,926 No. No, you didn't. 2652 01:30:41,294 --> 01:30:43,294 Teddy, I am so confused. 2653 01:30:43,296 --> 01:30:45,963 Why are you here? And who is she? 2654 01:30:45,965 --> 01:30:47,798 I can explain. It ain't what it look like. 2655 01:30:47,800 --> 01:30:49,468 I'm in here with a bunch of kids, 2656 01:30:49,470 --> 01:30:51,269 dressed in street clothes. 2657 01:30:51,271 --> 01:30:54,205 Then remember I blew out the, uh, Barbecue Shack. 2658 01:30:54,207 --> 01:30:56,074 Fire took me out of that thing. 2659 01:30:56,076 --> 01:30:58,476 And now my windshield was-was messed... 2660 01:30:58,478 --> 01:31:00,378 got me messed up about the car. 2661 01:31:00,380 --> 01:31:03,915 My brakes ain't working, 'cause I backed into this, um... 2662 01:31:03,917 --> 01:31:06,184 She gay. She ain't even... 2663 01:31:06,186 --> 01:31:08,319 She ain't even interested in me. 2664 01:31:08,321 --> 01:31:10,188 So... so... 2665 01:31:10,190 --> 01:31:11,389 Goddamn it. 2666 01:31:11,391 --> 01:31:12,457 Lisa. 2667 01:31:12,459 --> 01:31:13,559 - Not now. Not now. - Wait. 2668 01:31:13,561 --> 01:31:14,828 Lisa. 2669 01:31:16,329 --> 01:31:17,829 Okay, Lisa. 2670 01:31:17,831 --> 01:31:19,197 Lisa, Lisa. 2671 01:31:19,199 --> 01:31:20,531 Lisa, can you listen, please? 2672 01:31:20,533 --> 01:31:22,533 Lisa, please just listen. 2673 01:31:22,535 --> 01:31:24,970 What? What are you gonna say, Teddy? 2674 01:31:27,073 --> 01:31:29,073 I'm a high school dropout. 2675 01:31:29,075 --> 01:31:31,109 Okay? That woman in there, 2676 01:31:31,111 --> 01:31:33,877 Carrie... that's my night school teacher. 2677 01:31:33,879 --> 01:31:35,446 That's what I've been doing all these evenings. 2678 01:31:35,448 --> 01:31:37,282 I've been studying to get my GED 2679 01:31:37,284 --> 01:31:39,185 so that I can get a job at Marvin's. 2680 01:31:40,353 --> 01:31:41,986 So you don't work there now? 2681 01:31:41,988 --> 01:31:43,854 I don't... 2682 01:31:43,856 --> 01:31:45,490 I don't work there yet. 2683 01:31:45,492 --> 01:31:47,558 Right now I work at a fast food restaurant 2684 01:31:47,560 --> 01:31:49,594 called Christian Chicken, 2685 01:31:49,596 --> 01:31:52,130 where the chicken is Christian for some reason. 2686 01:31:52,132 --> 01:31:53,231 JAYLEN: Oh, wait. L-Lisa, 2687 01:31:53,233 --> 01:31:54,365 Lisa, Lisa, let me just 2688 01:31:54,367 --> 01:31:55,500 say this before you judge him. 2689 01:31:55,502 --> 01:31:57,167 It ain't that average chicken. 2690 01:31:57,169 --> 01:31:58,935 It's not the same fast food 2691 01:31:58,937 --> 01:32:00,971 that you be getting from these other little hood spots. 2692 01:32:00,973 --> 01:32:03,308 It's got the flavor... I don't know if they use a needle, 2693 01:32:03,310 --> 01:32:05,078 - but they get the flavor... - Jaylen, Jaylen, Jaylen! 2694 01:32:06,146 --> 01:32:07,345 How do you know my name? 2695 01:32:07,347 --> 01:32:09,514 My nigga be talking about you in the class all the time. 2696 01:32:09,516 --> 01:32:12,249 He said you was bad. I didn't know you was that bad. 2697 01:32:12,251 --> 01:32:14,052 We're Teddy's classmates. I'm Theresa. 2698 01:32:14,054 --> 01:32:17,322 - That's Jaylen, Mila, Mackenzie, and Luis. - Hey. 2699 01:32:17,324 --> 01:32:19,590 You remember me? I-I was actually the waiter 2700 01:32:19,592 --> 01:32:22,593 at the restaurant when Teddy pulled all of his pubes, 2701 01:32:22,595 --> 01:32:24,528 and then... and he put 'em in the cheesecake 2702 01:32:24,530 --> 01:32:25,997 to get out of paying. 2703 01:32:25,999 --> 01:32:29,099 Now we're best friends. 2704 01:32:29,101 --> 01:32:30,468 (SCOFFS) 2705 01:32:30,470 --> 01:32:32,404 Thank you for your honesty. 2706 01:32:34,506 --> 01:32:35,539 Honesty. 2707 01:32:35,541 --> 01:32:38,309 I know... 2708 01:32:38,311 --> 01:32:40,645 that this is a lot to take in. 2709 01:32:40,647 --> 01:32:41,679 Really? 2710 01:32:41,681 --> 01:32:43,380 But if you let me explain... 2711 01:32:43,382 --> 01:32:45,148 - No. - If you just... if you let me explain... 2712 01:32:45,150 --> 01:32:47,086 No, Teddy, I'm done with your explanations. 2713 01:32:48,954 --> 01:32:50,457 You lied to me about everything. 2714 01:32:51,957 --> 01:32:53,090 Why? 2715 01:32:53,092 --> 01:32:55,025 To impress me? 2716 01:32:55,027 --> 01:32:57,194 Teddy, I make my own money. 2717 01:32:57,196 --> 01:32:59,529 You think I care about what kind of car you drive 2718 01:32:59,531 --> 01:33:01,699 or what kind of watch you have on? 2719 01:33:01,701 --> 01:33:04,101 That's not me. 2720 01:33:04,103 --> 01:33:06,203 If you think that, then you don't know me. 2721 01:33:06,205 --> 01:33:07,504 That's not true. 2722 01:33:07,506 --> 01:33:08,605 If you don't know me, 2723 01:33:08,607 --> 01:33:09,673 then you couldn't truly love me. 2724 01:33:09,675 --> 01:33:11,343 That's not true, Lisa. 2725 01:33:14,514 --> 01:33:16,281 Don't come back to the apartment tonight. 2726 01:33:19,451 --> 01:33:22,454 Well, maybe you could stay with your night school friend. 2727 01:33:25,492 --> 01:33:27,527 Maybe she'd have some use for this. 2728 01:33:28,661 --> 01:33:31,263 It's probably fake, right? 2729 01:33:35,033 --> 01:33:36,031 MAYA: Lisa. 2730 01:33:36,033 --> 01:33:37,100 - Lis... - (DOOR OPENS) 2731 01:33:37,102 --> 01:33:38,170 Lisa! 2732 01:33:39,271 --> 01:33:40,607 (DOOR CLOSES) 2733 01:33:48,045 --> 01:33:49,980 GLADYS: I cut the crust off, 2734 01:33:49,982 --> 01:33:52,082 just how you like it. 2735 01:33:52,084 --> 01:33:53,650 Thanks, Ma. 2736 01:33:53,652 --> 01:33:57,587 You're not seriously skipping that GED test, are you? 2737 01:33:57,589 --> 01:33:59,121 Yeah. 2738 01:33:59,123 --> 01:34:01,659 I mean, I was doing all that stuff for Lisa. 2739 01:34:01,661 --> 01:34:04,327 If she's not around, then what's the point? 2740 01:34:04,329 --> 01:34:06,463 My poor baby, I feel terrible. 2741 01:34:06,465 --> 01:34:09,499 Oh, Gladys, now, stop coddling this boy. 2742 01:34:09,501 --> 01:34:11,133 - (SIGHS) - You know, Theodore, 2743 01:34:11,135 --> 01:34:12,769 you're a grown-ass man. 2744 01:34:12,771 --> 01:34:14,739 You need to get your shit together. 2745 01:34:14,741 --> 01:34:16,139 I know, Dad. 2746 01:34:16,141 --> 01:34:18,375 I mean, you say you got dyslexia, 2747 01:34:18,377 --> 01:34:20,644 "dyscoglia." 2748 01:34:20,646 --> 01:34:22,144 Dyscalculia. 2749 01:34:22,146 --> 01:34:23,647 However you say it. 2750 01:34:23,649 --> 01:34:26,116 The issue is you're dishonest. 2751 01:34:26,118 --> 01:34:28,084 I don't blame that girl for dumping you. 2752 01:34:28,086 --> 01:34:31,089 - Now, Gerald, that is enough. - Uh-huh. 2753 01:34:32,324 --> 01:34:34,256 You know, maybe you're right. 2754 01:34:34,258 --> 01:34:36,292 Maybe I do deserve it. 2755 01:34:36,294 --> 01:34:37,461 You think? 2756 01:34:37,463 --> 01:34:40,063 I was being sarcastic. 2757 01:34:40,065 --> 01:34:42,399 I'll get your bed ready, baby. 2758 01:34:42,401 --> 01:34:44,201 Would you like a tuck-in? 2759 01:34:44,203 --> 01:34:45,404 Yes, please. 2760 01:34:46,605 --> 01:34:47,771 Thank you, Mom. 2761 01:34:47,773 --> 01:34:49,408 Anything for you, darling. 2762 01:34:55,180 --> 01:34:56,548 I failed. 2763 01:34:58,717 --> 01:35:00,986 I failed as a father. 2764 01:35:02,087 --> 01:35:03,655 A tuck-in? 2765 01:35:04,790 --> 01:35:06,323 (INDISTINCT WHISPERING) 2766 01:35:06,325 --> 01:35:08,558 Oh, my gosh, why'd he come on the bus like that? 2767 01:35:08,560 --> 01:35:10,562 - I don't know. - He ain't got no friends. 2768 01:35:14,600 --> 01:35:16,166 What's the problem? 2769 01:35:16,168 --> 01:35:18,100 ♪ 2770 01:35:18,102 --> 01:35:19,603 TEDDY: Christian Chicken! 2771 01:35:19,605 --> 01:35:21,505 - (HORN HONKING) - ♪ Call me Mr. Pitiful... 2772 01:35:21,507 --> 01:35:23,506 Honk once if you love chicken. 2773 01:35:23,508 --> 01:35:26,276 Honk twice if you love the Lord. 2774 01:35:26,278 --> 01:35:28,111 Come and get your chicken if you... 2775 01:35:28,113 --> 01:35:29,646 ready to start winning. 2776 01:35:29,648 --> 01:35:31,113 Hey. 2777 01:35:31,115 --> 01:35:32,281 Sellout! 2778 01:35:32,283 --> 01:35:33,315 What? 2779 01:35:33,317 --> 01:35:34,784 You a sellout, man. 2780 01:35:34,786 --> 01:35:36,218 Brother, I'm just trying to make an honest living. 2781 01:35:36,220 --> 01:35:37,420 Why don't you get off my back? 2782 01:35:37,422 --> 01:35:39,422 Go get a job at the post office, then. 2783 01:35:39,424 --> 01:35:41,190 - Get your ass up out of here. - What? Say it again! 2784 01:35:41,192 --> 01:35:42,325 - (DOOR OPENS) - Come on, man! 2785 01:35:42,327 --> 01:35:43,392 - Go ahead with that. - (DOOR CLOSES) 2786 01:35:43,394 --> 01:35:44,628 Stay woke, brah. 2787 01:35:44,630 --> 01:35:47,698 Yeah, well, I see you ate the chicken, you son of a bitch. 2788 01:35:50,235 --> 01:35:52,204 So, this is what it's come to, huh? 2789 01:35:55,206 --> 01:35:57,206 You got some nerve, man. 2790 01:35:57,208 --> 01:35:58,543 Teddy, look. 2791 01:36:00,177 --> 01:36:02,812 I came here to apologize. 2792 01:36:02,814 --> 01:36:05,114 I'm on my break. 2793 01:36:05,116 --> 01:36:07,182 - I ain't got time for this. - Teddy, please, just listen. 2794 01:36:07,184 --> 01:36:08,651 I don't want to hear nothing you got to say, man. 2795 01:36:08,653 --> 01:36:09,485 No, please just listen to me. 2796 01:36:09,487 --> 01:36:10,619 I don't have nothing to say to you. 2797 01:36:10,621 --> 01:36:12,655 I just... well, I have something to say to you, okay? 2798 01:36:12,657 --> 01:36:13,757 - What? What? - Give me 30 seconds, okay? 2799 01:36:13,759 --> 01:36:15,292 30 seconds. Go. 2800 01:36:15,294 --> 01:36:17,359 Listen, when-when we were in high school, 2801 01:36:17,361 --> 01:36:18,795 you had everything that I wanted. 2802 01:36:18,797 --> 01:36:20,496 You got 28 seconds left. 2803 01:36:20,498 --> 01:36:21,898 I had grades. That's all I had. 2804 01:36:21,900 --> 01:36:25,201 You-you had sports, friends, girls. 2805 01:36:25,203 --> 01:36:26,836 - I sucked at all that. - 20. 2806 01:36:26,838 --> 01:36:28,772 I was 27 when I got my first hand job. 2807 01:36:28,774 --> 01:36:31,640 You're at one, but before I... before I walk away, 2808 01:36:31,642 --> 01:36:33,208 I want to tell you that's sad. 2809 01:36:33,210 --> 01:36:34,343 - That's my point. - I don't care. 2810 01:36:34,345 --> 01:36:35,444 - Why are you telling me? - My point is... 2811 01:36:35,446 --> 01:36:37,814 I was a late bloomer, and I was desperate and sad, 2812 01:36:37,816 --> 01:36:39,281 and I blamed you. 2813 01:36:39,283 --> 01:36:41,517 And the other night, 2814 01:36:41,519 --> 01:36:44,653 when I got my revenge, it felt awful. 2815 01:36:44,655 --> 01:36:46,755 I got into education to make a difference 2816 01:36:46,757 --> 01:36:49,326 in people's lives, not to ruin them. 2817 01:36:49,328 --> 01:36:50,860 - (CAR DOOR OPENS) - CARRIE: Also, 2818 01:36:50,862 --> 01:36:53,562 I told Stewart here I'd beat his ass 2819 01:36:53,564 --> 01:36:55,464 if he didn't come and apologize. 2820 01:36:55,466 --> 01:36:56,865 That is true. That was a part... 2821 01:36:56,867 --> 01:36:58,400 part of it, a small part. 2822 01:36:58,402 --> 01:36:59,902 Okay, you know what, guys? 2823 01:36:59,904 --> 01:37:03,640 I appreciate the whole after-school special moment. 2824 01:37:03,642 --> 01:37:05,809 But understand that I am okay. 2825 01:37:05,811 --> 01:37:07,743 I am where I'm supposed to be. 2826 01:37:07,745 --> 01:37:09,378 - All right? - Your destiny is to work 2827 01:37:09,380 --> 01:37:11,447 at a fast food joint next to a strip club? 2828 01:37:11,449 --> 01:37:13,883 Yes. All right, if I stand in the right spot 2829 01:37:13,885 --> 01:37:16,285 in this parking lot, I can smell cocoa butter 2830 01:37:16,287 --> 01:37:18,253 and fried chicken at the same time. 2831 01:37:18,255 --> 01:37:20,789 And I don't know about you guys, but that's a win for me. 2832 01:37:20,791 --> 01:37:23,325 - Teddy, l-listen to me. Ted... - Ain't no "Teddy, listen." 2833 01:37:23,327 --> 01:37:24,727 You know I wasn't gonna pass that test, 2834 01:37:24,729 --> 01:37:26,261 so don't sit here and act like 2835 01:37:26,263 --> 01:37:27,897 it wasn't gonna be a different story. 2836 01:37:27,899 --> 01:37:29,331 And don't act like you don't want 2837 01:37:29,333 --> 01:37:30,799 to be able to finally say that I'm dumb. 2838 01:37:30,801 --> 01:37:31,667 No, you're not. 2839 01:37:31,669 --> 01:37:33,902 You can finally say it, Stew. Say it. 2840 01:37:33,904 --> 01:37:35,971 Teddy... 2841 01:37:35,973 --> 01:37:38,507 you are a lot of things. 2842 01:37:38,509 --> 01:37:39,876 A hustler. 2843 01:37:39,878 --> 01:37:41,310 A liar. 2844 01:37:41,312 --> 01:37:42,845 You're very short. 2845 01:37:42,847 --> 01:37:45,314 - Mad loud, too. - Mmm. 2846 01:37:45,316 --> 01:37:47,616 But you are not dumb. 2847 01:37:47,618 --> 01:37:50,987 Now, this suit you got on is dumb as hell. 2848 01:37:50,989 --> 01:37:52,721 - I rebuke you. - You...? 2849 01:37:52,723 --> 01:37:54,456 Rebuke. I rebuke you! 2850 01:37:54,458 --> 01:37:55,924 - Boy... give me this thing. - I'm going to work. 2851 01:37:55,926 --> 01:37:57,626 Now, let me go back to... What you doing? 2852 01:37:57,628 --> 01:37:58,861 - What you doing, man? - Take this suit off, 2853 01:37:58,863 --> 01:38:00,930 - and you gonna take this test. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 2854 01:38:00,932 --> 01:38:02,564 - No, let's use our words. - You gonna take this test. 2855 01:38:02,566 --> 01:38:03,699 - All right, come here. - You know what? 2856 01:38:03,701 --> 01:38:04,867 - What you doing? - She has a belt. 2857 01:38:04,869 --> 01:38:05,734 - She's got a belt! - (TEDDY SCREAMS) 2858 01:38:05,736 --> 01:38:07,469 - You gonna take this suit off. - Hey! 2859 01:38:07,471 --> 01:38:08,871 - Uh, guys, guys, guys, guys... - (CLAMORING) 2860 01:38:08,873 --> 01:38:10,773 - You stop! You stay there! - Get off me! 2861 01:38:10,775 --> 01:38:12,507 It's gonna hurt me more than it's gonna hurt you. 2862 01:38:12,509 --> 01:38:14,643 Oh, God, I can't be a part of this. 2863 01:38:14,645 --> 01:38:17,312 Gonna tear your ass up! 2864 01:38:17,314 --> 01:38:18,747 Okay, this seems like a black thing, 2865 01:38:18,749 --> 01:38:20,816 so I-I'm just gonna order us some food. 2866 01:38:20,818 --> 01:38:22,517 - All right! All right! - Now, listen to me. 2867 01:38:22,519 --> 01:38:23,752 - You listening to me? - Yes. 2868 01:38:23,754 --> 01:38:25,587 Now, you have worked too hard to be 2869 01:38:25,589 --> 01:38:28,424 running around here in a damn holy chicken suit. 2870 01:38:28,426 --> 01:38:30,359 - Okay? - Yes. 2871 01:38:30,361 --> 01:38:32,393 Now, either you get in the car 2872 01:38:32,395 --> 01:38:34,763 and you take that test, 2873 01:38:34,765 --> 01:38:37,934 or I continue to tenderize your ass! 2874 01:38:37,936 --> 01:38:39,437 Your choice. 2875 01:38:43,007 --> 01:38:45,475 - Are you ready? - Good luck, guys. 2876 01:38:46,609 --> 01:38:48,342 - Yeah. - I'm back. 2877 01:38:48,344 --> 01:38:49,914 Hey, Carrie. 2878 01:38:53,283 --> 01:38:54,418 (SIGHS) 2879 01:38:57,988 --> 01:38:59,888 - MACKENZIE: Teddy! - MILA: Aw, Teddy's back. 2880 01:38:59,890 --> 01:39:01,657 Good to see you, bro. What's up, Ted? 2881 01:39:01,659 --> 01:39:04,326 - MILA: Hey, Teddy. - MACKENZIE: Teddy! Teddy! 2882 01:39:04,328 --> 01:39:05,326 Yes! 2883 01:39:05,328 --> 01:39:06,461 (CHUCKLING) 2884 01:39:06,463 --> 01:39:07,528 JAYLEN: What up, king? 2885 01:39:07,530 --> 01:39:08,764 Come on, man. 2886 01:39:08,766 --> 01:39:10,698 Let's do this. 2887 01:39:10,700 --> 01:39:11,935 LUIS: Our hero returns. 2888 01:39:13,437 --> 01:39:14,937 (SIGHS) 2889 01:39:14,939 --> 01:39:17,506 CARRIE: Okay. We're complete. 2890 01:39:17,508 --> 01:39:19,742 So let's turn on those computers 2891 01:39:19,744 --> 01:39:21,476 and ace this thing. 2892 01:39:21,478 --> 01:39:22,577 Go. 2893 01:39:22,579 --> 01:39:23,978 (SIGHS) 2894 01:39:23,980 --> 01:39:26,081 Okay, robot. 2895 01:39:26,083 --> 01:39:28,719 You bowing down to a god today. 2896 01:39:33,656 --> 01:39:35,389 Good luck, everybody. 2897 01:39:35,391 --> 01:39:38,594 ♪ 2898 01:39:38,596 --> 01:39:40,396 (GRUNTING QUIETLY) 2899 01:39:42,665 --> 01:39:43,968 (GRUNTS) 2900 01:39:47,104 --> 01:39:48,771 Ah. 2901 01:39:48,773 --> 01:39:49,807 (GROANS) 2902 01:39:51,976 --> 01:39:53,778 (SIGHS) 2903 01:39:54,912 --> 01:39:56,579 Come on, Teddy. 2904 01:40:02,553 --> 01:40:03,786 CARRIE: Focus. 2905 01:40:03,788 --> 01:40:04,887 Concentrate. 2906 01:40:04,889 --> 01:40:06,521 Get rid of that mind chatter. 2907 01:40:06,523 --> 01:40:07,990 (GRUNTS) 2908 01:40:07,992 --> 01:40:09,457 - Come on. Focus. - (YELLS) 2909 01:40:09,459 --> 01:40:11,492 - Focus! - Oh, God! 2910 01:40:11,494 --> 01:40:13,028 (ECHOING): Focus. You better get it right. 2911 01:40:13,030 --> 01:40:15,365 - (SCREAMING) - Focus, focus, focus! 2912 01:40:16,901 --> 01:40:18,835 ♪ 2913 01:40:22,972 --> 01:40:24,909 ♪ 2914 01:40:42,959 --> 01:40:43,893 Yeah! 2915 01:40:45,929 --> 01:40:46,863 Shh. 2916 01:40:50,034 --> 01:40:52,834 Okay, everybody calm down, all right? 2917 01:40:52,836 --> 01:40:54,902 The results will be in online in just a minute. 2918 01:40:54,904 --> 01:40:59,106 - If you get over 145, you pass. - TEDDY: She's right. 2919 01:40:59,108 --> 01:41:00,976 All right, you do the hard work, you get rewarded for it. 2920 01:41:00,978 --> 01:41:02,476 - No need to panic. - (ELECTRONIC CHIMING) 2921 01:41:02,478 --> 01:41:03,946 Hey, hey, hey. The results just came in. 2922 01:41:03,948 --> 01:41:06,714 - Oh, shit. - MACKENZIE: Oh, my gosh. Uh... 2923 01:41:06,716 --> 01:41:08,950 I passed. I got a 146! 2924 01:41:08,952 --> 01:41:11,185 - (WHOOPING, CHEERING) - 146! Nice! Yeah! 2925 01:41:11,187 --> 01:41:12,754 - Way to go. - MACKENZIE: Yes! 2926 01:41:12,756 --> 01:41:14,022 Management, here I come, baby! 2927 01:41:14,024 --> 01:41:15,190 - He deserved that. - (CHIMING) 2928 01:41:15,192 --> 01:41:17,859 - 168. - Oh! 2929 01:41:17,861 --> 01:41:19,660 - JAYLEN: Swim big! - (WHOOPS) 2930 01:41:19,662 --> 01:41:21,596 I don't have to do housework anymore. 2931 01:41:21,598 --> 01:41:23,430 - BOBBY: I passed! - Yay! Bobby passed. 2932 01:41:23,432 --> 01:41:24,766 - Bobby passed, y'all. - Yes, Bobby. 2933 01:41:24,768 --> 01:41:26,567 165, B! 2934 01:41:26,569 --> 01:41:27,935 - Way to go, man. - (MILA WHOOPS) 2935 01:41:27,937 --> 01:41:30,104 - I'm going to college. - CARRIE: Yeah! 2936 01:41:30,106 --> 01:41:31,706 - She ready! - Hey! - Proud of you, kiddo. 2937 01:41:31,708 --> 01:41:32,840 Proud of you, kiddo. 2938 01:41:32,842 --> 01:41:35,542 Guys. Guys. 2939 01:41:35,544 --> 01:41:37,980 (WHIMPERING): I'm... I'm gonna be a dental hy-enist. 2940 01:41:37,982 --> 01:41:39,780 "Hygienist." He's saying "hygienist." 2941 01:41:39,782 --> 01:41:41,182 I'm gonna be a dental hy-enist. 2942 01:41:41,184 --> 01:41:42,817 - Yes. It's good for you, man. - (CHIMING) 2943 01:41:42,819 --> 01:41:43,918 JAYLEN: Y'all ready for this? 2944 01:41:43,920 --> 01:41:45,953 - What? - Jay got a 146! 2945 01:41:45,955 --> 01:41:47,989 Jay got a damn 146! 2946 01:41:47,991 --> 01:41:50,092 - Same as you, fam! Yeah! - Yeah! 2947 01:41:50,094 --> 01:41:51,726 - Yeah! We won this! - Proud of you guys. 2948 01:41:51,728 --> 01:41:53,094 - You said it. - JAYLEN: What you got? 2949 01:41:53,096 --> 01:41:54,495 What you got? Come on, Teddy. 2950 01:41:54,497 --> 01:41:56,130 MACKENZIE: Come on, Teddy. 2951 01:41:56,132 --> 01:41:58,032 I can't. I can't check it. 2952 01:41:58,034 --> 01:42:00,067 Here, Carrie, here, you check mine for me. 2953 01:42:00,069 --> 01:42:01,702 (SIGHING): Oh, God. 2954 01:42:01,704 --> 01:42:02,937 I'm too nervous, man. 2955 01:42:02,939 --> 01:42:04,505 MACKENZIE: Come on. 2956 01:42:04,507 --> 01:42:06,107 JAYLEN: Genius level. 2957 01:42:06,109 --> 01:42:07,942 MACKENZIE: That's right. 2958 01:42:07,944 --> 01:42:09,509 Whew! 2959 01:42:09,511 --> 01:42:11,012 Teddy, I'm sorry. 2960 01:42:11,014 --> 01:42:12,680 Come on, Carrie. Don't play right now. 2961 01:42:12,682 --> 01:42:14,048 Just... just tell me the score. 2962 01:42:14,050 --> 01:42:15,516 Tell me what I got. 2963 01:42:15,518 --> 01:42:16,586 I'm not joking with you this... 2964 01:42:17,887 --> 01:42:19,122 You didn't pass. 2965 01:42:30,166 --> 01:42:32,768 I got a 117. 2966 01:42:34,170 --> 01:42:36,069 I'm sorry, Teddy. 2967 01:42:36,071 --> 01:42:37,772 It doesn't matter. You know why? 2968 01:42:37,774 --> 01:42:40,608 Because this is a... this is a minor setback 2969 01:42:40,610 --> 01:42:42,143 for a major comeback. 2970 01:42:42,145 --> 01:42:44,245 - Yes. - I'm-a take the test again, guys. 2971 01:42:44,247 --> 01:42:46,713 - That's right. Yes. - You should! 2972 01:42:46,715 --> 01:42:48,249 - I'm-a take the test again. - You take it again! 2973 01:42:48,251 --> 01:42:49,216 You're taking it again. That's right. 2974 01:42:49,218 --> 01:42:50,251 (HIGH-PITCHED): I said I'm-a take it again! 2975 01:42:50,253 --> 01:42:53,187 Oh, God, he's doing that thing with his voice. 2976 01:42:53,189 --> 01:42:54,855 Yeah, I know. I heard it, too. 2977 01:42:54,857 --> 01:42:56,589 (HIGH-PITCHED): I'm-a take the test again! 2978 01:42:56,591 --> 01:42:57,757 ♪ Hey, hey 2979 01:42:57,759 --> 01:42:59,293 ♪ Some people sometimes 2980 01:42:59,295 --> 01:43:02,198 ♪ They think they need to call it a day... ♪ 2981 01:43:05,168 --> 01:43:06,599 Is everybody getting the same number? 2982 01:43:06,601 --> 01:43:07,600 - Hey, Marv. - Yeah? 2983 01:43:07,602 --> 01:43:08,601 I failed. 2984 01:43:08,603 --> 01:43:09,970 You failed the test? 2985 01:43:09,972 --> 01:43:11,238 But I'm-a take it again. 2986 01:43:11,240 --> 01:43:12,940 That's why you stopped by? 2987 01:43:12,942 --> 01:43:15,009 ♪ Ain't never been caught up... ♪ 2988 01:43:15,011 --> 01:43:16,243 I failed again. 2989 01:43:16,245 --> 01:43:18,845 Yep, but I'm-a take it again now. 2990 01:43:18,847 --> 01:43:20,281 I'm-a take it again. 2991 01:43:20,283 --> 01:43:23,616 ♪ I'm saying I see my future... ♪ 2992 01:43:23,618 --> 01:43:25,653 - (DOOR OPENS) - TEDDY: Hey, y'all. 2993 01:43:25,655 --> 01:43:27,620 I definitely didn't pass that one. 2994 01:43:27,622 --> 01:43:28,755 I mean, there was a whole section 2995 01:43:28,757 --> 01:43:29,823 that I didn't even understand. 2996 01:43:29,825 --> 01:43:31,827 I'm-a take it again, though. 2997 01:43:33,996 --> 01:43:36,029 You sure he's not just dumb? 2998 01:43:36,031 --> 01:43:37,665 TEDDY: Well, the new test results 2999 01:43:37,667 --> 01:43:39,000 just came in. 3000 01:43:39,002 --> 01:43:40,334 I failed. 3001 01:43:40,336 --> 01:43:42,069 Wait a minute. 3002 01:43:42,071 --> 01:43:43,737 Wait, I passed. 3003 01:43:43,739 --> 01:43:45,038 You what? 3004 01:43:45,040 --> 01:43:47,007 A 178. That's, like, college, right? 3005 01:43:47,009 --> 01:43:48,174 - I passed. - (GASPS) 3006 01:43:48,176 --> 01:43:49,310 - (CHEERING) - You passed? 3007 01:43:49,312 --> 01:43:51,678 (CHEERING AND WHOOPING) 3008 01:43:51,680 --> 01:43:53,280 ♪ Hey... 3009 01:43:53,282 --> 01:43:57,150 I passed! I passed! 3010 01:43:57,152 --> 01:43:58,752 You killed it, son. 3011 01:43:58,754 --> 01:44:00,821 I did it, man! I did it! 3012 01:44:00,823 --> 01:44:03,157 Hey, watch your back. Watch your back! 3013 01:44:03,159 --> 01:44:05,159 Oh, yeah! 3014 01:44:05,161 --> 01:44:07,127 - ALL: Teddy! Teddy! - Whoa! 3015 01:44:07,129 --> 01:44:08,895 - Teddy! Teddy! - I passed! 3016 01:44:08,897 --> 01:44:10,230 Teddy! Teddy! 3017 01:44:10,232 --> 01:44:13,267 Thank you! Thank you! 3018 01:44:13,269 --> 01:44:15,604 (SOBBING) 3019 01:44:17,240 --> 01:44:18,740 TEDDY: I don't deserve it! 3020 01:44:20,675 --> 01:44:23,676 We, the class of 2018, represent a generation 3021 01:44:23,678 --> 01:44:25,379 of forward-thinking, 3022 01:44:25,381 --> 01:44:28,115 rule-challenging, fearless leaders. 3023 01:44:28,117 --> 01:44:30,717 Let us go forward from this day 3024 01:44:30,719 --> 01:44:32,819 with confidence and with courage. 3025 01:44:32,821 --> 01:44:36,189 As we cross this stage, let us do so with the knowledge 3026 01:44:36,191 --> 01:44:41,227 that with faith in ourselves, nothing is impossible. 3027 01:44:41,229 --> 01:44:43,063 - Thank you. - (APPLAUSE) 3028 01:44:43,065 --> 01:44:44,966 (GASPS) 3029 01:44:48,036 --> 01:44:50,770 Beautiful and inspiring words. 3030 01:44:50,772 --> 01:44:51,938 Thank you, Mikayla. 3031 01:44:51,940 --> 01:44:53,340 Now, before we conclude, 3032 01:44:53,342 --> 01:44:55,241 I'm sure some of you are wondering 3033 01:44:55,243 --> 01:44:59,312 why we have adult students with us onstage. 3034 01:44:59,314 --> 01:45:01,148 Well, as you all know, 3035 01:45:01,150 --> 01:45:03,083 I am an innovator. 3036 01:45:03,085 --> 01:45:05,018 A maverick. 3037 01:45:05,020 --> 01:45:07,320 I don't play by the... 3038 01:45:07,322 --> 01:45:08,721 (CLEARS THROAT) 3039 01:45:08,723 --> 01:45:10,689 - (CHUCKLES) - So I have decided, 3040 01:45:10,691 --> 01:45:12,926 for the first time in Piedmont history, 3041 01:45:12,928 --> 01:45:14,328 to invite our night school graduates 3042 01:45:14,330 --> 01:45:15,795 to join our seniors. 3043 01:45:15,797 --> 01:45:17,430 They have elected one of their own 3044 01:45:17,432 --> 01:45:19,165 to speak on their behalf. 3045 01:45:19,167 --> 01:45:21,868 It is with great pride 3046 01:45:21,870 --> 01:45:24,104 that I introduce Mr. Teddy Walker. 3047 01:45:24,106 --> 01:45:25,272 (APPLAUSE) 3048 01:45:25,274 --> 01:45:26,673 - Hey, all right. - (WHOOPING) 3049 01:45:26,675 --> 01:45:28,041 - Yeah! - You got this, Teddy. 3050 01:45:28,043 --> 01:45:30,043 - You got this. - Teddy! Teddy! 3051 01:45:30,045 --> 01:45:31,411 Teddy! Teddy! 3052 01:45:31,413 --> 01:45:34,680 Teddy! Teddy! Teddy! 3053 01:45:34,682 --> 01:45:36,014 - Teddy! Teddy! - (CHUCKLING) 3054 01:45:36,016 --> 01:45:37,085 Teddy! 3055 01:45:38,186 --> 01:45:39,819 (CLEARS THROAT) 3056 01:45:39,821 --> 01:45:42,755 Uh, let me just start off by telling you guys 3057 01:45:42,757 --> 01:45:44,126 a little something about me. 3058 01:45:45,460 --> 01:45:48,261 I'm Teddy Walker, and... 3059 01:45:48,263 --> 01:45:50,029 I'm a liar. 3060 01:45:50,031 --> 01:45:51,865 ♪ 3061 01:45:51,867 --> 01:45:55,368 For years, I've been pretending to be somebody else. 3062 01:45:55,370 --> 01:45:57,337 Somebody that I'm not. 3063 01:45:57,339 --> 01:46:02,275 And my reason for doing that is because I was ashamed. 3064 01:46:02,277 --> 01:46:05,713 Ashamed that I didn't learn like my classmates. 3065 01:46:07,115 --> 01:46:10,716 Ashamed that I couldn't take a test. 3066 01:46:10,718 --> 01:46:13,753 Ashamed that I let my family and my friends down. 3067 01:46:13,755 --> 01:46:16,923 I mean, I put so much time and energy into creating 3068 01:46:16,925 --> 01:46:19,325 this fake version of Teddy Walker 3069 01:46:19,327 --> 01:46:22,728 that I forgot the value that went into learning in school. 3070 01:46:22,730 --> 01:46:24,931 I'm talking about honesty. 3071 01:46:24,933 --> 01:46:27,167 I'm talking about accepting who you are. 3072 01:46:27,169 --> 01:46:28,968 And it wasn't until I met 3073 01:46:28,970 --> 01:46:32,372 my amazing night school classmates and... 3074 01:46:32,374 --> 01:46:35,443 and a teacher that actually believed in me... 3075 01:46:37,112 --> 01:46:41,447 ...that I was able to accept who I was. 3076 01:46:41,449 --> 01:46:43,516 As a loudmouth hustler with a boatload 3077 01:46:43,518 --> 01:46:46,320 of learning disabilities. 3078 01:46:55,029 --> 01:46:57,829 You know, for any of you who may have struggled 3079 01:46:57,831 --> 01:47:00,098 - to get it right the first time... - Lisa. - Hi. 3080 01:47:00,100 --> 01:47:02,402 ...that I am living proof 3081 01:47:02,404 --> 01:47:06,972 that you can get it together on a second chance. 3082 01:47:06,974 --> 01:47:08,807 I mean, I done had a lot of chances. 3083 01:47:08,809 --> 01:47:10,209 Mm-hmm. 3084 01:47:10,211 --> 01:47:12,545 - 'Cause I messed up a lot. - Mm-hmm. 3085 01:47:12,547 --> 01:47:15,415 But I made it to the other side. 3086 01:47:15,417 --> 01:47:17,015 I mean, hell, we all did. 3087 01:47:17,017 --> 01:47:18,218 Ain't that right, night school crew? 3088 01:47:18,220 --> 01:47:19,485 Hell yeah. 3089 01:47:19,487 --> 01:47:21,954 (CHEERING, WHOOPING) 3090 01:47:21,956 --> 01:47:23,889 TEDDY: We all got second chances. 3091 01:47:23,891 --> 01:47:25,193 And to my dad. 3092 01:47:26,528 --> 01:47:28,194 He was... he was tough on me. 3093 01:47:28,196 --> 01:47:31,063 He said some things, but he said it out of love. 3094 01:47:31,065 --> 01:47:32,532 (TEDDY SNIFFLING) 3095 01:47:32,534 --> 01:47:34,099 (CRYING): Dad, I know you ain't never mean it 3096 01:47:34,101 --> 01:47:35,500 when you used to say some of the things 3097 01:47:35,502 --> 01:47:37,003 that you used to say. 3098 01:47:37,005 --> 01:47:38,338 You know, you used to say stuff like, 3099 01:47:38,340 --> 01:47:40,506 "I wish I ain't never had you." 3100 01:47:40,508 --> 01:47:43,108 Or like, uh, 3101 01:47:43,110 --> 01:47:44,843 - "That was a waste of sperm." - CARRIE: Oh! 3102 01:47:44,845 --> 01:47:46,511 - Oh. - "Oh, God, if I could 3103 01:47:46,513 --> 01:47:48,814 get that nut back." I remember you said that. 3104 01:47:48,816 --> 01:47:51,117 But all that stuff was said out of love 3105 01:47:51,119 --> 01:47:52,884 to motivate me and push me. 3106 01:47:52,886 --> 01:47:54,920 And you thought you didn't do good, 3107 01:47:54,922 --> 01:47:56,090 but look at me now. 3108 01:47:57,458 --> 01:48:00,192 Anything is possible! 3109 01:48:00,194 --> 01:48:02,328 (APPLAUSE AND CHEERING) 3110 01:48:02,330 --> 01:48:04,231 (WHISTLING) 3111 01:48:05,966 --> 01:48:07,866 I did it! 3112 01:48:07,868 --> 01:48:09,868 - Yeah! Hurray! - Go, Teddy! 3113 01:48:09,870 --> 01:48:10,868 Hey, Dad. 3114 01:48:10,870 --> 01:48:12,137 I did it, Dad! 3115 01:48:12,139 --> 01:48:13,606 I told you. 3116 01:48:13,608 --> 01:48:14,940 What'd I tell you? 3117 01:48:14,942 --> 01:48:17,510 (CHUCKLING): Okay. Okay. 3118 01:48:17,512 --> 01:48:19,911 Yeah! 3119 01:48:19,913 --> 01:48:21,546 (WHOOPS) 3120 01:48:21,548 --> 01:48:24,450 Can't believe I took off work for this shit. 3121 01:48:24,452 --> 01:48:26,286 (CHEERING) 3122 01:48:26,288 --> 01:48:28,287 (LAUGHING) 3123 01:48:28,289 --> 01:48:31,056 Thank you, guys, for the flowers. 3124 01:48:31,058 --> 01:48:33,927 - Look what it says. - (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 3125 01:48:36,398 --> 01:48:38,196 - Hey! - Well, I definitely need the work. 3126 01:48:38,198 --> 01:48:40,434 - I need the money, so... - That's, uh... that's Teddy. 3127 01:48:44,204 --> 01:48:46,038 MARVIN: When's the last time you were in love? 3128 01:48:46,040 --> 01:48:48,039 - I work. I have a job. I'm saving lives. - Okay. Okay. 3129 01:48:48,041 --> 01:48:50,208 - Okay. You love your job. - That's what I love to do. 3130 01:48:50,210 --> 01:48:52,377 DENISE: Oh, there he is. 3131 01:48:52,379 --> 01:48:55,180 My little, smart, dumb-ass brother. 3132 01:48:55,182 --> 01:48:56,315 I'm so proud of you. 3133 01:48:56,317 --> 01:48:57,582 - Oh, thank you. - Yes. 3134 01:48:57,584 --> 01:48:59,251 - Good to see you. - Good to see you. 3135 01:48:59,253 --> 01:49:00,486 - Thank you. - Yes. - (MARVIN BLOWS INTO HANDS) 3136 01:49:00,488 --> 01:49:02,020 - Ah. Give me some, man. - Ah! Congrats. 3137 01:49:02,022 --> 01:49:04,056 Thank you, man. How do I look? Do I look smart? 3138 01:49:04,058 --> 01:49:05,490 You look unbelievable. Let me see your smart face. 3139 01:49:05,492 --> 01:49:06,625 - Hmm. - Hit it. One, two, three. 3140 01:49:06,627 --> 01:49:07,559 Show me the smart face. 3141 01:49:07,561 --> 01:49:08,527 - Yeah, it's still stupid. - Show it to me. 3142 01:49:08,529 --> 01:49:10,228 - That's it. - I love it. - Okay, that's fine. 3143 01:49:10,230 --> 01:49:11,463 - Okay. All right. - That's all right. 3144 01:49:11,465 --> 01:49:12,567 (LIGHT LAUGHTER) 3145 01:49:14,068 --> 01:49:16,136 - (WHISPERS): Call me. - (CLEARS THROAT) 3146 01:49:18,238 --> 01:49:20,971 Hey. 3147 01:49:20,973 --> 01:49:22,276 That was a beautiful speech, Teddy. 3148 01:49:24,110 --> 01:49:26,347 That's the guy I fell in love with. 3149 01:49:28,615 --> 01:49:30,584 Then allow me to reintroduce myself. 3150 01:49:32,985 --> 01:49:34,588 I'm Teddy Walker. 3151 01:49:36,055 --> 01:49:37,590 I'm a high school dropout. 3152 01:49:37,592 --> 01:49:40,127 I work at a fast food joint. 3153 01:49:41,228 --> 01:49:42,262 I live with my mom. 3154 01:49:43,364 --> 01:49:45,129 And I take the bus. 3155 01:49:45,131 --> 01:49:47,431 But I would love... 3156 01:49:47,433 --> 01:49:49,903 I would absolutely love it... 3157 01:49:52,005 --> 01:49:54,308 ...if you would let me take you on a date. 3158 01:49:56,976 --> 01:49:59,210 Nice to meet you, Teddy Walker. 3159 01:49:59,212 --> 01:50:02,381 (CHUCKLING) 3160 01:50:02,383 --> 01:50:04,982 I'd like that. 3161 01:50:04,984 --> 01:50:07,051 You're gonna have to pay for everything 3162 01:50:07,053 --> 01:50:09,086 because I... I don't have any money. 3163 01:50:09,088 --> 01:50:10,454 Oh, I figured. 3164 01:50:10,456 --> 01:50:12,524 I mean, like no money. 3165 01:50:12,526 --> 01:50:13,592 I got you. 3166 01:50:13,594 --> 01:50:14,693 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 3167 01:50:14,695 --> 01:50:17,362 THERESA: Let's do a photo. 3168 01:50:17,364 --> 01:50:18,730 Night school photo. 3169 01:50:18,732 --> 01:50:20,197 "GED" on three. You ready? 3170 01:50:20,199 --> 01:50:22,667 - "GED" on three. - One, two, three. 3171 01:50:22,669 --> 01:50:25,070 - ALL: GED! - (CAMERA CLICKS) 3172 01:50:25,072 --> 01:50:27,007 ♪ 3173 01:50:37,751 --> 01:50:42,587 ♪ Huh! Hey ya 3174 01:50:42,589 --> 01:50:45,289 - ♪ Hey ya... - STEWART: Hey! Hey! Hey! 3175 01:50:45,291 --> 01:50:46,690 - (MUSIC STOPS) - Hey, hey, hey! 3176 01:50:46,692 --> 01:50:48,560 What is going on? 3177 01:50:48,562 --> 01:50:50,729 It's turn-up time, Stewart. 3178 01:50:50,731 --> 01:50:52,431 Well, this... 3179 01:50:52,433 --> 01:50:55,132 - is my house. - Prove it. 3180 01:50:55,134 --> 01:50:57,435 - ♪ One, two, three, uh! - (GRUNTING RHYTHMICALLY) 3181 01:50:57,437 --> 01:51:00,772 (CROWD SHOUTING EXCITEDLY) 3182 01:51:00,774 --> 01:51:03,408 ♪ Shake it, shake-shake it, shake it ♪ 3183 01:51:03,410 --> 01:51:05,309 - ♪ Oh, oh - ♪ Shake it, shake it 3184 01:51:05,311 --> 01:51:07,244 ♪ Shake it, shake it, shake it ♪ 3185 01:51:07,246 --> 01:51:09,747 ♪ Shake it like a Polaroid picture ♪ 3186 01:51:09,749 --> 01:51:11,415 ♪ All right, all right, all right ♪ 3187 01:51:11,417 --> 01:51:13,017 ♪ All right, all right, all right, all right ♪ 3188 01:51:13,019 --> 01:51:14,051 ♪ All right, all right, all right ♪ 3189 01:51:14,053 --> 01:51:16,020 ♪ All right, all right, all right, all right ♪ 3190 01:51:16,022 --> 01:51:17,288 ♪ Oh, oh 3191 01:51:17,290 --> 01:51:19,091 - ♪ I... - ♪ Here we go. 3192 01:51:23,062 --> 01:51:24,997 ♪ 3193 01:51:24,999 --> 01:51:27,699 Subtitles by explosiveskull 3194 01:51:27,701 --> 01:51:30,267 ♪ Pat yourself on the back 3195 01:51:30,269 --> 01:51:32,703 - ♪ You just did that - ♪ Hey ♪ 3196 01:51:32,705 --> 01:51:34,605 ♪ Pat yourself on the back 'cause ♪ 3197 01:51:34,607 --> 01:51:37,709 - ♪ On the back ♪ - ♪ You just did that 3198 01:51:37,711 --> 01:51:40,177 ♪ You just graduated 3199 01:51:40,179 --> 01:51:42,781 ♪ You need a vacation 3200 01:51:42,783 --> 01:51:44,748 ♪ Thanks for all your patience ♪ 3201 01:51:44,750 --> 01:51:46,383 ♪ Hands up 'cause we made it 3202 01:51:46,385 --> 01:51:47,785 - ♪ Hands up ♪ - ♪ Everyone go 3203 01:51:47,787 --> 01:51:49,253 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3204 01:51:49,255 --> 01:51:50,522 ♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh 3205 01:51:50,524 --> 01:51:51,723 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3206 01:51:51,725 --> 01:51:52,824 ♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh 3207 01:51:52,826 --> 01:51:54,525 ♪ You just graduated 3208 01:51:54,527 --> 01:51:56,560 ♪ Put your hands up 'cause you made it ♪ 3209 01:51:56,562 --> 01:51:57,661 ♪ Hands up ♪ 3210 01:51:57,663 --> 01:51:59,563 ♪ First in the fam, I made it 3211 01:51:59,565 --> 01:52:01,433 - ♪ First ♪ - ♪ First in the fam graduatin' ♪ 3212 01:52:01,435 --> 01:52:03,300 - ♪ First ♪ - ♪ Put a lot of time in 3213 01:52:03,302 --> 01:52:05,102 - ♪ I almost failed it - ♪ Failed it ♪ 3214 01:52:05,104 --> 01:52:06,770 ♪ I'm talkin' bad, bad grades, you couldn't save me ♪ 3215 01:52:06,772 --> 01:52:07,638 - ♪ Bad, bad ♪ - ♪ Middle finger 3216 01:52:07,640 --> 01:52:08,839 ♪ Every teacher tried to play me ♪ 3217 01:52:08,841 --> 01:52:11,140 - ♪ "F" you ♪ - ♪ Now I'm on their playlist 3218 01:52:11,142 --> 01:52:12,444 - ♪ Yeah, they play me - ♪ Ah ♪ 3219 01:52:12,446 --> 01:52:14,178 ♪ Mama said it wasn't crazy, didn't faze me ♪ 3220 01:52:14,180 --> 01:52:15,647 - ♪ At all ♪ - ♪ You want a class reunion 3221 01:52:15,649 --> 01:52:17,248 - ♪ Now you gotta pay me - ♪ Check ♪ 3222 01:52:17,250 --> 01:52:18,816 ♪ I know my whole alma mater probably hate me ♪ 3223 01:52:18,818 --> 01:52:20,451 - ♪ So? ♪ - ♪ I was the class clown 3224 01:52:20,453 --> 01:52:22,118 ♪ Now I flex Grammys 3225 01:52:22,120 --> 01:52:24,321 ♪ They all pregnant, shit, I'm flyin' on a Bentley ♪ 3226 01:52:24,323 --> 01:52:25,489 ♪ And when you picked 'em, bitch ♪ 3227 01:52:25,491 --> 01:52:27,157 - ♪ You should've picked me - ♪ That ♪ 3228 01:52:27,159 --> 01:52:29,527 ♪ Hey, you just graduated 3229 01:52:29,529 --> 01:52:32,096 ♪ You need a vacation 3230 01:52:32,098 --> 01:52:34,398 ♪ Thanks for all your patience ♪ 3231 01:52:34,400 --> 01:52:36,100 ♪ Hands up 'cause we made it 3232 01:52:36,102 --> 01:52:37,468 - ♪ One, two, hands up ♪ - ♪ Everyone go 3233 01:52:37,470 --> 01:52:38,638 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3234 01:52:39,739 --> 01:52:41,171 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3235 01:52:41,173 --> 01:52:42,439 ♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh 3236 01:52:42,441 --> 01:52:44,140 ♪ You just graduated 3237 01:52:44,142 --> 01:52:45,709 ♪ Put your hands up 'cause you made it ♪ 3238 01:52:45,711 --> 01:52:47,611 - ♪ Hands up ♪ - ♪ When I walk across the stage ♪ 3239 01:52:47,613 --> 01:52:49,179 - ♪ I ain't lookin' back - ♪ Lookin' back ♪ 3240 01:52:49,181 --> 01:52:50,347 ♪ When I walk through that door ♪ 3241 01:52:50,349 --> 01:52:51,883 - ♪ I ain't comin' back - ♪ Comin' back ♪ 3242 01:52:51,885 --> 01:52:53,851 ♪ Take my cap and gown off, then I throw my hat ♪ 3243 01:52:53,853 --> 01:52:55,486 - ♪ Whoo! ♪ - ♪ Pat my dawg on the back 3244 01:52:55,488 --> 01:52:57,220 - ♪ 'Cause he did that - ♪ My dawg ♪ 3245 01:52:57,222 --> 01:52:59,188 ♪ Kiss my crush in the mouth 'cause it's 'bout time ♪ 3246 01:52:59,190 --> 01:53:01,358 ♪ I hope you're all about your money, 'cause I'm 'bout mine ♪ 3247 01:53:01,360 --> 01:53:02,560 - ♪ Check ♪ - ♪ I'm-a miss homecoming 3248 01:53:02,562 --> 01:53:04,595 - ♪ Miss spring break - ♪ Spring break ♪ 3249 01:53:04,597 --> 01:53:06,630 ♪ Please don't try to be my friend, 'cause it's too late ♪ 3250 01:53:06,632 --> 01:53:08,532 ♪ You think I'm-a let you play me like a dumb-ass? ♪ 3251 01:53:08,534 --> 01:53:10,400 - ♪ Never ♪ - ♪ I learned how to count a check ♪ 3252 01:53:10,402 --> 01:53:11,702 - ♪ Up in math class - ♪ Clever ♪ 3253 01:53:11,704 --> 01:53:13,571 ♪ I learned unprotected sex ain't so bad ♪ 3254 01:53:13,573 --> 01:53:15,406 - ♪ Mmm ♪ - ♪ I had friends that passed out ♪ 3255 01:53:15,408 --> 01:53:16,874 ♪ Some didn't pass, thank God 3256 01:53:16,876 --> 01:53:19,175 ♪ You just graduated 3257 01:53:19,177 --> 01:53:21,512 ♪ You need a vacation 3258 01:53:21,514 --> 01:53:23,781 ♪ Thanks for all your patience ♪ 3259 01:53:23,783 --> 01:53:25,549 ♪ Hands up 'cause we made it 3260 01:53:25,551 --> 01:53:26,917 - ♪ Hands up, hands up ♪ - ♪ Everyone go 3261 01:53:26,919 --> 01:53:28,218 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3262 01:53:28,220 --> 01:53:29,386 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3263 01:53:29,388 --> 01:53:30,487 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3264 01:53:30,489 --> 01:53:31,822 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3265 01:53:31,824 --> 01:53:33,556 ♪ You just graduated 3266 01:53:33,558 --> 01:53:35,592 ♪ Put your hands up 'cause you made it ♪ 3267 01:53:35,594 --> 01:53:36,794 - ♪ Hands up ♪ - ♪ Everyone go 3268 01:53:36,796 --> 01:53:37,928 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3269 01:53:37,930 --> 01:53:39,196 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3270 01:53:39,198 --> 01:53:40,264 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3271 01:53:40,266 --> 01:53:41,532 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3272 01:53:41,534 --> 01:53:43,734 ♪ You just graduated 3273 01:53:43,736 --> 01:53:45,703 ♪ Thank you for your patience 3274 01:53:45,705 --> 01:53:46,737 ♪ Everyone go 3275 01:53:46,739 --> 01:53:47,939 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3276 01:53:47,941 --> 01:53:49,340 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3277 01:53:49,342 --> 01:53:50,507 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3278 01:53:50,509 --> 01:53:51,742 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3279 01:53:51,744 --> 01:53:53,611 ♪ You just graduated 3280 01:53:53,613 --> 01:53:55,713 ♪ Put your hands up 'cause you made it ♪ 3281 01:53:55,715 --> 01:53:57,715 - ♪ Hands up ♪ - ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3282 01:53:57,717 --> 01:53:58,949 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3283 01:53:58,951 --> 01:54:00,551 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3284 01:54:00,553 --> 01:54:01,752 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3285 01:54:01,754 --> 01:54:03,654 ♪ You just graduated 3286 01:54:03,656 --> 01:54:05,355 ♪ Thank you for your patience 3287 01:54:05,357 --> 01:54:06,389 ♪ Everyone go 3288 01:54:06,391 --> 01:54:07,791 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3289 01:54:07,793 --> 01:54:09,192 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3290 01:54:09,194 --> 01:54:10,426 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh 3291 01:54:10,428 --> 01:54:11,661 ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 3292 01:54:11,663 --> 01:54:13,364 ♪ You just graduated 3293 01:54:13,366 --> 01:54:15,466 ♪ Put your hands up 'cause you made it ♪ 3294 01:54:15,468 --> 01:54:16,802 ♪ Hands up. 3295 01:54:18,671 --> 01:54:22,472 ♪ Nobody's ever, ever gonna stop el sueño ♪ 3296 01:54:22,474 --> 01:54:24,675 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 3297 01:54:24,677 --> 01:54:28,311 ♪ No desert, no snake gonna take me down ♪ 3298 01:54:28,313 --> 01:54:31,314 ♪ Take me down, no way ♪ 3299 01:54:31,316 --> 01:54:35,284 ♪ Nobody's ever, ever gonna stop el sueño ♪ 3300 01:54:35,286 --> 01:54:37,521 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 3301 01:54:37,523 --> 01:54:40,824 ♪ I'm always gonna find the strength to survive ♪ 3302 01:54:40,826 --> 01:54:43,660 ♪ To survive ♪ 3303 01:54:43,662 --> 01:54:46,729 ♪ El sueño, el sueño 3304 01:54:46,731 --> 01:54:51,669 ♪ El sueño, el sueño, el sueño ♪ 3305 01:54:51,671 --> 01:54:55,838 ♪ I'm living the dream 3306 01:54:55,840 --> 01:54:58,574 ♪ Out here busy gettin' money 3307 01:54:58,576 --> 01:55:01,578 ♪ I got two bad... countin' for me ♪ 3308 01:55:01,580 --> 01:55:03,814 ♪ I want a seven-digit house on the hill ♪ 3309 01:55:03,816 --> 01:55:06,416 - ♪ I'm-a do it good! - ♪ This is my dream 3310 01:55:06,418 --> 01:55:08,018 ♪ You know I keep it trill 3311 01:55:08,020 --> 01:55:10,453 ♪ They call me Young Coconut, I'm en la playa ♪ 3312 01:55:10,455 --> 01:55:12,556 - ♪ Playa! - ♪ Don't get it twisted 3313 01:55:12,558 --> 01:55:14,992 - ♪ 'Cause I'm never gonna retire ♪ - ♪ Oh, hell no! ♪ 3314 01:55:14,994 --> 01:55:17,593 ♪ I Uber in these streets, I'm wildin' with my peeps ♪ 3315 01:55:17,595 --> 01:55:19,328 ♪ I got a stripper on my seat 3316 01:55:19,330 --> 01:55:21,030 ♪ 'Cause she know Jay brought that beat ♪ 3317 01:55:21,032 --> 01:55:22,498 ♪ El sueño 3318 01:55:22,500 --> 01:55:26,036 ♪ Nobody's ever, ever gonna stop el sueño ♪ 3319 01:55:26,038 --> 01:55:28,005 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 3320 01:55:28,007 --> 01:55:31,407 ♪ No desert, no snake gonna take me down ♪ 3321 01:55:31,409 --> 01:55:34,343 ♪ Take me down, no way ♪ 3322 01:55:34,345 --> 01:55:38,514 ♪ Nobody's ever, ever gonna stop el sueño ♪ 3323 01:55:38,516 --> 01:55:40,717 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 3324 01:55:40,719 --> 01:55:44,789 ♪ I'm always gonna find the strength to survive ♪ 3325 01:55:46,591 --> 01:55:48,794 ♪ ¡El sueño! ♪ 223359

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