Original subtitles

Maud, Maud. Here you are finally.

Come join us. Come. Lift up your dress.

Caress yourself.

Yes. Touch yourself, Maude

Touch yourself like before.

If you only knew how much I miss you.

Every moment, every second.

I regret.

I regret so many things.

It's a little lonely when you don't visit.

It's so calm here. - Yes.

Like that.

Touch yourself more.

I, also enjoyed touching myself, when I had the time.

between 2 flights.

Idi Amin!

Idi Amin. Idi Amin. Come on, darling.

Yeah, I'm taking a shit!

Hurry up. The plane is going to leave.

It's going to leave without us.

We're late!

Hurry up!

Ok, I'm just wiping my ass!

Idi Amin, I'm coming.

Filth! Trashy white woman! Bitch! (Name: Charlene Dodd, Stewardess)

What's going on here?

Your Excellency, please. (ATTEMPTED SUICIDE BY GAS)

It was on that day that I had decided to kill myself.

If all women who like black guys did the same...

It's terrible.

I died before knowing any of that.

Well... they didn't allow colored people in my hotel.

A failure! You're nothing but a failure!

Yes, dear.

My mother had warned me. My father had warned me! - Yes, yes

And now this confirms it. He was right!

I'm such an idiot. I was blinded by love.

Who would ever believe that we're on our honeymoon? Who?

We only did it twice in two weeks!

Twice, and even at that...

I need tenderness!

Do you hear me?

Do you hear me?

You spend all your time reading the newspaper!

And back at St-Etienne, you had the reputation of being the city's biggest womanizer!

Yeah, right! Some womanizer!

- Ok, Ok, it's enough.

Yeah, well I thought I got the best deal in the whole city!

Apparently, that's not the case.

Selfish! That's what you are!

A selfish bastard!

And I was stupid enough to think that you married me out of love.

When all this time you were only after my father's business.

He was always against our wedding.

He was right. He knew that you were a useless good-for-nothing!

Don't...Don't get angry.

Good For Nothing! I'll say it again!

Anyways, I know you don't care about what people might think.

No, no.

I'm warning you, if this goes on I'll want to divorce!

That way you can say goodbye to the business and to dad's money.

Ok, that's enough. Enough.

It would be too easy.

Ok you wanted to get married fine.

But denying me of the affection I'm entitled to is not fair!

Yeah, yeah.

But that's all going to change. You'll see.

Yes, yes.

You're going to have to earn dad's money!

Yes, yes.

You know...

Mom...

She called me last night.

To see how we were.

I didn't want to complain so she wouldn't be alarmed.

Nice, nice!

But I won't hesitate to tell her what's going on.

Once they get home

No, no.

Yes. Um...no.

You know, I'll tell her everything!

No. You...you shouldn't.

What are you saying?

I'm saying....um..nothing!

Listen. Do you understand that we must also depend on you a little?

Come join me in the Laundromat.

You'll do the same thing to me.

Of course you wouldn't.

We don't mess around here. (Name: Alice Lemieux, Hotel Employee)

Ok. That's it! I've seen enough of you!

With you, I get nothing but problems, Get out!

(ATTEMPTED SUICIDE BY DROWNING)

So that's why you wanted to die?

I disgusted myself.

It became the only thing I lived for,

the only thing I thought about.

As for you, we thought of you.

I think you were the only one with a valid reason to end it all.

Poor Penelope.

Poor naive little girl.

Wake up, Penelope!

Wake up!

Penelope!

Penelope, wake up!

No need to smile like an idiot.

Keep all that for Edouard, if you want him to play your shitty record later on.

Following...

our telephone conversation

on the 23rd of this month...

Does the smoke bother you?

We confirm

That we will assure the direct broadcasting of all concerts.

of all pop-music concerts....

of the Kampala festival

The other concerts will be broadcasted...

at different times.

We will also assure the broadcasting of various commercials...

...on our channel.

Miss, did you send the check to Mr. Vial?

Yes, sir. It left this morning

Good. Let's continue.

On the other hand, we retain...

full exclusivity...

to any ulterior re-broadcastings

on our different channels...

of these concerts of Kampala.

Furthermore...

as for the royalties,

We...ask...

Write here the usual polite formula...

We ask you to please...etc.etc.

There.

Very well, sweetie. It's perfect.

Alain is a good guy, but not very important

He's friends with José, the director of the show.

Ah shit! stupid wire!

We have to fix this.

Shit!

How can one work like this?

Shit!

Obviously, José is not the gentleman type.

But if he just says one word to Edouard, it's a hit parade!

In hope to climb the charts of the Hit Parade, Here's Penelope with " Drowning in your eyes"

Name: Penelope Dupin, Artist

ATTEMPTED SUICIDE WITH BARBITURATE

One day ago, I came to offer you a deal.

A strange deal.

Hello?

Yes.

Is it an emergency?

Yes, I'll transfer you to the service. Stay on the line.

23.

Hello service?

I have an emergency.

Dying is a way too important thing to mess up.

I also want to die.

but in a pleasant way.

in the most pleasant way possible....

by climaxing.

Do you want to be part of this trip?

MADAM IS SERVED...

Let me introduce you to Arnold.

Nice to meet you Arnold.

Since this poor boy got struck by lightning,

while he was joyously masturbating in the suburbs,

he instantly lost his speech due to the shock.

But, on the other hand,

he never lost his erection.

Arnold, leave us.

And now, it's served. Let's eat.

Very well.

I met one like that once before but not as bad.

Bull's balls,

stuffed ox vagina,

and goat testicles "Provençale" style.

I’ll have testicles. - Help yourself

I'll taste the wine.

How exciting!

How could we have tried to kill ourselves so foolishly?

in such a vulgar manner.

When all the while there was this sublime death.

We didn't waste a second.

We wanted to climax!

It's a good thing Maud was there to set us straight.

And I thought I was acting for your own good.

You did, Maud. You did.

Remember the 2 studs?

They must remember, for sure.

Hello gentlemen.

To what do we owe the pleasure of your visit?

Hi madam, we're conducting a research...

Hello you!

You're doing a research. What about? - Hello

Well, umm...

Come this way please. Don't be afraid.

Let us take care of you.

Here you are. Have a seat.

There.

Well, sit down.

Please, my friend and I wouldn't want to mess up your...

Nonsense, have a seat.

There isn't that better?

So what are we starting with?

Well...

That's not bad. Not bad at all.

Such nice eyes too.

He's got what it takes.

and soft skin too.

I had to start.

I couldn't have handled another first one.

Maybe he'd be sad if he knew that I was...

that I was...

Dead? Richard?

Yes, Richard.

I know you disliked him.

Because I loved you too much. He ruined your life.

and you achieved my death.

Hello?

Hello Mr. Messager.

Good, and yourself?

Yes, I still have her under contract, Mr. Messager.

15 days on an American spotlight? oh she'll agree...

But of course, Mr. Messager.

Goodbye.

Goodbye, Thank you!

Where is that bitch?

It's Richard! He came to get me.

He forgives me. He's taking me to NY.

He already has the tickets.

I'm so happy!

Don't be impatient. She wants to look beautiful for your reunion.

Holy shit! Guys!

Am I still in bed or what?

Shit!

Holy fucking shit!

She's the same type as the girls from my country. The same.

She's a brunette. I like brunettes.

Don't be an asshole!

Hey guys!

She's not moving.

She's dead.

Let's get out of here quick. - Yeah.

Come on let's go!

Come on. Move your ass!

Let's go!

Start it!

Ok, ok here we go.

I understand, Charlene. You're scared that you won't have the strength to go all the way.

I'll help you, my darling.

We'll help you.

Arnold. Give her the most pleasurable of all deaths.

It's for her own good.

Now, It's my turn

I will come join you.

No!

You must not die.

Thanks to your presence, we're not isolated from the world of the living.

We exist through you.

Continue what you started Maud.

Yes. Continue, Maud.

Go. Go and find others.

Come back soon.

Dying is a way too important thing to mess up.

Maud, finally here you are.

Lift up your dress.

Caress yourself.

Yes.

Touch yourself, Maud.

Touch yourself, like before

Go Maud, have courage.

I'm...very...tired. Leave me be...leave me be

Not yet.

There's still so much to do.

I want to rest.

Can't... I'm tired.

Tired.

Do it for us, Maud.

You owe us that much.

Can't anymore.

Maud.

Maud. Come back soon.

Maud, continue.

We're waiting for you, Maud.

Maud, you must continue.

You must gather the strength to continue, Maud.

We're leaving, Arnold.

Created exclusively for CG