Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,648 --> 00:00:08,441
Hey, there's a guy who
looks like he's ready
2
00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:11,991
to take the world by the
balls and never stop squeezing.
3
00:00:11,992 --> 00:00:13,971
- Oh, that's it?
- That's it.
4
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,151
- How nice and simple.
- Here, eat this.
5
00:00:16,152 --> 00:00:17,841
- This for me?
- Yeah, breakfast burrito!
6
00:00:17,842 --> 00:00:19,356
I can't have my business
partner pounding the pavement
7
00:00:19,356 --> 00:00:21,386
- on an empty stomach.
- Oh, my God!
8
00:00:24,295 --> 00:00:27,394
Fuck, come on, man. Smaller
bites, smaller bites!
9
00:00:28,048 --> 00:00:31,365
Yeah, or maybe make
a tighter burrito...?
10
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:32,525
Really?
11
00:00:35,525 --> 00:00:38,374
- Was that our first fight?
- Yeah, I think so.
12
00:00:38,375 --> 00:00:40,434
Well done.
13
00:00:40,435 --> 00:00:42,434
- You, too.
- Let me get that for ya.
14
00:00:46,385 --> 00:00:48,094
That's working like a charm.
15
00:00:48,119 --> 00:00:50,118
- Aw!
- Oh, man!
16
00:00:50,358 --> 00:00:51,913
That was my best vacuum.
17
00:00:51,946 --> 00:00:53,965
Damn it, that was my only tie.
18
00:00:54,062 --> 00:00:56,187
Well, it was your tie, but all right.
19
00:00:56,188 --> 00:00:57,492
Well, I better take my leave.
20
00:00:57,492 --> 00:00:58,495
Don't wanna be late on my first day,
21
00:00:58,495 --> 00:01:00,042
- right, business partner?
- You're right.
22
00:01:00,043 --> 00:01:01,764
- Here, don't forget this.
- No, no, no.
23
00:01:01,765 --> 00:01:03,143
I'm not really a coffee
guy. Makes me shit.
24
00:01:03,168 --> 00:01:04,709
Neither am I.
25
00:01:06,789 --> 00:01:09,708
- Fuck, what?
- Thermos bong.
26
00:01:09,709 --> 00:01:11,210
- What do you think?
- I think
27
00:01:11,211 --> 00:01:13,592
you're the best business
decision I ever made.
28
00:01:14,221 --> 00:01:15,390
Time for a quick rip?
29
00:01:15,391 --> 00:01:17,154
It's 8:00 in the morning.
30
00:01:17,155 --> 00:01:19,014
- Yeah, right.
- I'm just kidding!
31
00:01:19,015 --> 00:01:20,489
Oh, fuck, you got me, man!
32
00:01:23,916 --> 00:01:27,852
- Synced and corrected by hawken45 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
33
00:01:54,075 --> 00:01:55,595
Kevin Pavarotti?
34
00:01:55,595 --> 00:01:56,814
Uh, yeah. Close enough.
35
00:01:57,164 --> 00:01:59,784
Hi, I'm Spencer. I manage the store.
36
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,275
What? "The" Spencer?
37
00:02:01,276 --> 00:02:03,620
No. It's just a fortunate coincidence.
38
00:02:03,645 --> 00:02:04,704
I'll say.
39
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:06,215
Uh, let me show you the problem.
40
00:02:06,216 --> 00:02:07,285
So, when I go to close up for the night,
41
00:02:07,286 --> 00:02:10,548
these lights just won't shut off.
42
00:02:11,016 --> 00:02:13,374
- Mm-hmm.
- Our electric bill is insane.
43
00:02:13,375 --> 00:02:14,676
I bet. Okay.
44
00:02:14,701 --> 00:02:16,810
Well... shit. Well, sir,
45
00:02:17,384 --> 00:02:20,700
I am a true professional
and I will not rest
46
00:02:20,701 --> 00:02:21,800
until I solve your ghost case.
47
00:02:21,801 --> 00:02:25,771
Oh, my God.
48
00:02:27,601 --> 00:02:29,630
Oh, Pac, you have made it.
49
00:02:31,444 --> 00:02:34,135
Lap of luxur... shit.
50
00:02:35,056 --> 00:02:36,591
Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
51
00:02:36,591 --> 00:02:38,600
- No, no, shh.
- Hey, I was enjoying that!
52
00:02:38,601 --> 00:02:40,820
No, shh, no, no, no,
man. The show is on.
53
00:02:40,821 --> 00:02:42,706
You're talking about that?
54
00:02:42,707 --> 00:02:44,726
That is not a show. That's a lamp, okay?
55
00:02:44,751 --> 00:02:46,690
Shows have things like
characters and storylines
56
00:02:46,691 --> 00:02:48,660
and... oh, shit.
57
00:02:48,661 --> 00:02:51,590
That one just split into
two. Look at the little baby.
58
00:02:51,591 --> 00:02:52,780
I hope the baby's okay.
59
00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:55,600
All right. I get it.
60
00:02:55,601 --> 00:02:56,720
That's a good show.
61
00:02:56,721 --> 00:02:59,640
But, unfortunately,
62
00:02:59,641 --> 00:03:01,700
the show's been cancelled.
63
00:03:01,701 --> 00:03:04,670
Oh, boo, man! Not cool!
64
00:03:04,671 --> 00:03:07,810
- Who are you?
- I am Pac.
65
00:03:08,223 --> 00:03:10,162
- Well, I'm Weasel.
- Well, Weasel,
66
00:03:10,187 --> 00:03:12,650
I am a medium and I'm here to help you.
67
00:03:12,651 --> 00:03:14,790
- You can see ghosts?
- I can.
68
00:03:14,791 --> 00:03:18,640
- Prove it.
- Like, by talking to you?
69
00:03:18,641 --> 00:03:20,600
Yeah.
70
00:03:20,601 --> 00:03:22,610
- Oh.
- Yeah, you got there.
71
00:03:22,611 --> 00:03:23,514
- Nice.
- Okay,
72
00:03:23,515 --> 00:03:25,160
tell me why you're
still sticking around.
73
00:03:25,185 --> 00:03:26,575
I don't really remember, man.
74
00:03:26,576 --> 00:03:28,485
Okay.
75
00:03:28,870 --> 00:03:29,949
All right, then. Fair enough.
76
00:03:29,950 --> 00:03:31,949
What is the last thing you remember?
77
00:03:31,950 --> 00:03:35,490
- I was going somewhere.
- Okay.
78
00:03:36,236 --> 00:03:37,919
- Any idea?
- Oh! Uh, Taco's!
79
00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,625
Going to get some tacos.
80
00:03:39,626 --> 00:03:41,715
No, no, no. I was going
to my buddy Taco's.
81
00:03:42,642 --> 00:03:44,169
- You were going to your buddy.
- Yeah.
82
00:03:44,194 --> 00:03:45,542
- He is named Taco.
- Yeah!
83
00:03:45,543 --> 00:03:46,712
- Got it.
- Oh, wait. But, no. Hold on.
84
00:03:46,737 --> 00:03:49,576
He wasn't home. I was,
like, really fucking hungry.
85
00:03:49,577 --> 00:03:51,539
So I decided to go get some tacos.
86
00:03:51,540 --> 00:03:53,225
You're going to go eat some tacos. Okay.
87
00:03:53,226 --> 00:03:54,710
Now I'm totally on board. Got it.
88
00:03:54,710 --> 00:03:57,629
But the taco place was closed.
89
00:03:58,493 --> 00:04:01,569
So I decided to go get Mushu instead.
90
00:04:01,569 --> 00:04:03,920
Mushu. Excellent choice.
You were still hungry,
91
00:04:03,921 --> 00:04:05,520
- after all.
- No, no, no, dude.
92
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:08,345
- Mushu is my girlfriend.
- What the fuck, man?
93
00:04:08,346 --> 00:04:10,604
She owed me money and
I decided to collect
94
00:04:10,605 --> 00:04:12,593
so I could go get some...
95
00:04:12,594 --> 00:04:13,753
- Tacos?
- Ice cream.
96
00:04:14,199 --> 00:04:16,208
No, man. The taco place was closed.
97
00:04:16,209 --> 00:04:18,219
You're not listening?
98
00:04:20,179 --> 00:04:23,119
You're a bad medium.
You're not listening to me.
99
00:04:26,119 --> 00:04:28,098
And that's when I settled on Thai food.
100
00:04:28,099 --> 00:04:29,208
Okay, Weasel.
101
00:04:29,209 --> 00:04:32,118
What happened...
102
00:04:32,119 --> 00:04:33,960
after you ate?
103
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:35,999
Oh, I had to fuel up for the thing.
104
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,869
- What thing?
- It's the Bong Pong-a-thon, man!
105
00:04:39,870 --> 00:04:42,008
It's, like, the biggest
bong pong tournament
106
00:04:42,009 --> 00:04:43,703
- in the Tri-state area.
- Okay,
107
00:04:43,704 --> 00:04:44,733
now we're getting somewhere.
108
00:04:44,735 --> 00:04:46,754
What exactly is bong pong?
109
00:04:46,755 --> 00:04:49,700
It's like beer pong with a twist to it.
110
00:04:50,675 --> 00:04:53,694
Is the twist that you smoke bongs
instead of drinking beer?
111
00:04:53,695 --> 00:04:54,814
The greatest game ever.
112
00:04:54,815 --> 00:04:56,664
Did you ever make it to that tournament?
113
00:04:56,665 --> 00:04:58,684
- No, man.
- No.
114
00:04:58,685 --> 00:05:00,654
I got hit by a retard bus.
115
00:05:00,655 --> 00:05:01,754
Oops.
116
00:05:01,755 --> 00:05:03,724
I left my partner high
117
00:05:03,725 --> 00:05:05,704
and high.
118
00:05:05,705 --> 00:05:08,714
- Never won the championship.
- Okay, well, bingo.
119
00:05:08,715 --> 00:05:10,382
That's it. That's your
unfinished business.
120
00:05:10,382 --> 00:05:12,804
We gotta find your partner
and win that tournament.
121
00:05:12,805 --> 00:05:14,704
Far out, man!
122
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:16,674
All right, let's get this show back on.
123
00:05:16,675 --> 00:05:18,744
Hey, who the fuck are you again?
124
00:05:19,030 --> 00:05:20,310
Doesn't matter.
125
00:05:29,675 --> 00:05:30,854
It's busted.
126
00:05:40,665 --> 00:05:42,313
Wait till you meet Nugget, man.
127
00:05:42,338 --> 00:05:44,311
He's, like, the chillest dude ever.
128
00:05:44,336 --> 00:05:45,754
Awesome. I love chill dudes.
129
00:05:45,755 --> 00:05:47,770
Ahem.
130
00:05:48,148 --> 00:05:51,824
I believe I may be looking
for your son, Nugget?
131
00:05:52,831 --> 00:05:54,674
- Nugget?
- Nugget.
132
00:05:55,214 --> 00:05:57,726
No one's called me
that name in 25 years.
133
00:05:57,751 --> 00:06:00,683
Nugget? Is that you, man?
134
00:06:01,073 --> 00:06:03,148
Holy shit, dude, you've aged terribly.
135
00:06:03,835 --> 00:06:06,824
Okay, well, this is gonna
sound, maybe, a little bit weird,
136
00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:09,674
but I am a medium and
I have been talking
137
00:06:09,675 --> 00:06:11,572
to the ghost of your old friend Weasel.
138
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:13,724
"Easy Weasy"?
139
00:06:13,725 --> 00:06:15,654
- He needs your help.
- Of course!
140
00:06:15,655 --> 00:06:17,307
I'd do anything for that guy.
141
00:06:17,332 --> 00:06:19,066
Okay, he needs you to enter
142
00:06:19,091 --> 00:06:21,140
the annual Bong
Pong-a-thon this weekend
143
00:06:21,141 --> 00:06:24,080
and he needs you to win.
144
00:06:24,081 --> 00:06:25,836
- I can't do that.
- Yes, you can.
145
00:06:25,836 --> 00:06:27,099
You just need a little confidence.
146
00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:29,660
I'm the Chief Resident and
the Head of Neurosurgery
147
00:06:29,660 --> 00:06:32,314
at the most prestigious
hospital in the city.
148
00:06:32,790 --> 00:06:34,709
I can't smoke weed.
149
00:06:34,710 --> 00:06:36,729
- But we need you, Nugget.
- But we need you, Nugget!
150
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,849
Nugget is dead.
151
00:06:38,850 --> 00:06:41,689
Whoa, man.
152
00:06:41,690 --> 00:06:43,759
Hold on.
153
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:45,739
Nugget's dead, too?
154
00:06:47,148 --> 00:06:48,719
I feel like I just saw him, man.
155
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,670
Come on, let's go.
156
00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,819
Whoa.
157
00:06:54,820 --> 00:06:56,274
Of course I've heard of bong pong.
158
00:06:56,274 --> 00:06:57,912
It's like beer pong, but with a twist.
159
00:06:57,912 --> 00:06:59,569
Yeah, well, the bigger twist
160
00:06:59,569 --> 00:07:01,410
is that this guy's partner, Nugget,
161
00:07:01,521 --> 00:07:02,891
is a 40-year-old brain surgeon
162
00:07:02,892 --> 00:07:04,840
who doesn't smoke weed anymore.
163
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:05,960
What are you doing?
164
00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:09,055
Well, you know how
our vacuum cleans good,
165
00:07:09,055 --> 00:07:10,164
but it doesn't clean great
166
00:07:10,165 --> 00:07:12,094
and you and I have sort of been trying
167
00:07:12,095 --> 00:07:14,234
to figure out ways to
make it more powerful?
168
00:07:14,235 --> 00:07:16,174
I've never once thought
about the vacuum.
169
00:07:16,175 --> 00:07:18,636
There's a huge market for
industrial-strength vacuums, man.
170
00:07:18,637 --> 00:07:20,261
I could knock on any door
in the city and sell one.
171
00:07:20,262 --> 00:07:22,443
Clyde, I believe you and I don't care!
172
00:07:22,443 --> 00:07:24,175
I have a ghost case to solve, man!
173
00:07:24,176 --> 00:07:27,282
Why don't you just ask the
ghost if you and I can enter?
174
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:29,336
Uh, no go, bro.
175
00:07:29,361 --> 00:07:30,623
One of you can play for me,
176
00:07:30,648 --> 00:07:33,026
but the other one has to be,
177
00:07:33,126 --> 00:07:34,266
uh... uh...
178
00:07:36,226 --> 00:07:38,255
be, um,
179
00:07:38,256 --> 00:07:40,265
- we just saw him.
- Nugget?
180
00:07:40,266 --> 00:07:43,145
- That's right. Nugget, man.
- No go, bro.
181
00:07:43,146 --> 00:07:44,245
It's gotta be Nugget.
182
00:07:44,615 --> 00:07:47,406
- Okay.
- Team Brain Damage'd has to win.
183
00:07:47,431 --> 00:07:50,361
And it's not Team Brain
Damage'd without...
184
00:07:52,136 --> 00:07:53,478
Nugget!
185
00:07:53,479 --> 00:07:56,213
Nugget is a brain surgeon, right?
186
00:07:56,522 --> 00:07:58,653
Pretty smart guy. We're smart guys.
187
00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:00,748
- So...
- Right.
188
00:08:01,526 --> 00:08:04,734
All we have to do is fight smart
guy fire with smart guy fire.
189
00:08:11,572 --> 00:08:12,985
You again? What?
190
00:08:12,986 --> 00:08:13,917
What are you doing here?
191
00:08:13,918 --> 00:08:15,816
Yeah, hi. My brain is kind of fucked up.
192
00:08:15,818 --> 00:08:16,907
I was wondering if you
could take a look at it.
193
00:08:16,908 --> 00:08:19,350
- Excuse me?
- The tiger is in the barn!
194
00:08:19,382 --> 00:08:20,987
What... hey!
195
00:08:20,988 --> 00:08:23,047
Hey! Ow! Oh, stop that!
196
00:08:23,048 --> 00:08:24,857
Stop that, please!
197
00:08:24,858 --> 00:08:25,937
Hey, what the hell is going on?
198
00:08:25,938 --> 00:08:27,907
- Come on, come on!
- Yes!
199
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,827
- Mm!
- We have pictures of you
200
00:08:29,828 --> 00:08:31,867
in a private room with a naked man.
201
00:08:31,868 --> 00:08:32,917
Looks like you're gonna be competing
202
00:08:32,918 --> 00:08:35,213
in that Bong Pong-a-thon after all.
203
00:08:35,238 --> 00:08:36,533
Guess you're not the only smart one
204
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:38,407
in the room now, are ya, Doc?
205
00:08:38,408 --> 00:08:40,577
Your... your lens cap is on.
206
00:08:40,578 --> 00:08:42,377
- Pfft.
- Yeah, nice try.
207
00:08:42,378 --> 00:08:42,860
- Oh, shit.
- Fuck.
208
00:08:42,861 --> 00:08:44,789
I wish I could help,
but I haven't played
209
00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:45,959
bong pong in forever.
210
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,889
I haven't even smoked
weed in, like, 25 years!
211
00:08:49,021 --> 00:08:52,960
You haven't smoked weed in 25 years?
212
00:08:52,961 --> 00:08:54,080
Okay, all right, you know what? Ahem.
213
00:08:54,081 --> 00:08:55,960
Fine, we will leave.
214
00:08:55,961 --> 00:08:57,861
Okay.
215
00:08:59,001 --> 00:09:01,860
But only after you take
a hit from this joint.
216
00:09:01,861 --> 00:09:03,900
I don't know. I... I'll pass.
217
00:09:04,404 --> 00:09:05,473
You can pass,
218
00:09:05,474 --> 00:09:07,076
but you've gotta puff-puff first.
219
00:09:07,077 --> 00:09:09,149
If my wife found out I
was smoking pot again,
220
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,874
she'd ground me.
221
00:09:10,874 --> 00:09:13,913
I mean she would leave
me. She'd leave me!
222
00:09:13,914 --> 00:09:15,893
Your wife sounds like a huge cunt.
223
00:09:15,894 --> 00:09:17,013
She's very particular.
224
00:09:17,038 --> 00:09:18,968
Particularly huge cunt.
225
00:09:19,980 --> 00:09:21,879
I mean... I mean, sure, sure,
226
00:09:21,904 --> 00:09:23,073
we could have sex more often
227
00:09:23,074 --> 00:09:24,953
than the third Thursday of every month.
228
00:09:24,954 --> 00:09:26,623
And it's true,
229
00:09:26,750 --> 00:09:28,913
it could be a position
other than missionary.
230
00:09:29,408 --> 00:09:31,537
And, yeah, she decided I was vegan,
231
00:09:31,618 --> 00:09:34,003
but a quinoa steak
232
00:09:34,004 --> 00:09:36,949
is...
233
00:09:37,914 --> 00:09:40,874
- Give me that fucking joint.
- Yeah, here.
234
00:09:42,954 --> 00:09:44,913
Ugh!
235
00:09:44,914 --> 00:09:46,923
Sorry.
236
00:09:46,924 --> 00:09:48,003
The first one always makes me sneeze.
237
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:49,874
Yeah, on my tits.
238
00:10:00,316 --> 00:10:01,415
Towel the door.
239
00:10:01,416 --> 00:10:03,446
Yes! I'll use my robe.
240
00:10:05,416 --> 00:10:07,435
Dr. Morris, dial 118.
241
00:10:08,263 --> 00:10:10,415
Nugget, now, you've been out
of the game for a long time.
242
00:10:10,416 --> 00:10:11,891
Long motherfuckin' time!
243
00:10:11,892 --> 00:10:13,615
And weed has changed.
244
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:16,058
We got a whole bunch of new
strains and cross-strains
245
00:10:16,083 --> 00:10:17,232
and hybrids and...
246
00:10:17,526 --> 00:10:19,465
we wanna make sure
you're prepared out there.
247
00:10:19,490 --> 00:10:21,312
- Okay.
- That's why I've compiled
248
00:10:21,313 --> 00:10:24,261
every type of weed that there is.
249
00:10:24,262 --> 00:10:26,371
- And we're...
- Gonna smoke the shit out of it?
250
00:10:26,372 --> 00:10:28,341
You bet we are!
251
00:10:28,342 --> 00:10:30,451
Oh, the batteries are weird.
252
00:10:30,452 --> 00:10:33,341
You gotta... you gotta
get it just right.
253
00:10:33,342 --> 00:10:35,431
Montage song, kick in already!
254
00:10:44,382 --> 00:10:46,362
Oh, that was close!
255
00:10:51,332 --> 00:10:52,431
You're fucking sad, both of you.
256
00:10:52,432 --> 00:10:55,261
Throw shorter.
257
00:10:55,262 --> 00:10:57,251
Oh, God.
258
00:10:57,252 --> 00:10:58,432
Throw fucking shorter.
259
00:11:03,262 --> 00:11:04,361
Oh!
260
00:11:04,362 --> 00:11:07,231
Oh!
261
00:11:07,232 --> 00:11:08,382
What? Open up.
262
00:11:10,312 --> 00:11:12,312
I'm supposed to be
operating on the mayor.
263
00:11:13,462 --> 00:11:15,372
Right now.
264
00:11:24,352 --> 00:11:25,461
Oh.
265
00:11:25,462 --> 00:11:27,301
But seriously, I have to go.
266
00:11:30,322 --> 00:11:32,282
Scalpel.
267
00:11:33,282 --> 00:11:34,432
Forceps.
268
00:11:36,302 --> 00:11:38,252
Doritos...?
269
00:11:39,252 --> 00:11:40,371
No?
270
00:11:40,372 --> 00:11:43,271
How about, uh... how
about some reggae music?
271
00:11:43,272 --> 00:11:45,242
Huh, set the mood?
272
00:11:46,362 --> 00:11:49,311
All right, let's put a clamp on that.
273
00:11:53,292 --> 00:11:54,331
Are we still doing this?
274
00:11:54,332 --> 00:11:57,301
- Cue the music.
- Sweet!
275
00:11:57,302 --> 00:12:00,242
Come on!
276
00:12:15,322 --> 00:12:17,251
Wait, how... how is this useful?
277
00:12:17,252 --> 00:12:18,401
Shh, just trust the process.
278
00:12:18,402 --> 00:12:20,331
Okay.
279
00:12:34,452 --> 00:12:37,411
Ah, yeah!
280
00:12:38,635 --> 00:12:41,371
This was such a great day!
281
00:12:41,372 --> 00:12:44,758
Oh, we are gonna crush
this "tourniement" tomorrow.
282
00:12:45,727 --> 00:12:47,291
"Tourniement."
283
00:12:48,411 --> 00:12:50,231
"Tourniement," is that... is that right?
284
00:12:50,232 --> 00:12:51,058
Tournament.
285
00:12:51,059 --> 00:12:52,996
No, no, that's definitely not right.
286
00:12:52,997 --> 00:12:54,176
Tournam...
287
00:12:55,284 --> 00:12:58,243
holy shit, I have no idea anymore.
288
00:12:58,268 --> 00:13:00,966
Tour-na-ment.
289
00:13:01,980 --> 00:13:04,136
- "Tour-nament."
- "Tour-na-ment."
290
00:13:04,137 --> 00:13:06,126
Alfred!
291
00:13:07,259 --> 00:13:09,293
Alfred, are you...?
292
00:13:09,365 --> 00:13:10,146
Stoned?
293
00:13:10,147 --> 00:13:12,036
No.
294
00:13:12,037 --> 00:13:14,910
You're grounded. No tournament for you.
295
00:13:15,418 --> 00:13:16,106
That sounds right.
296
00:13:16,896 --> 00:13:17,896
Who are you?
297
00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:19,847
That's...
298
00:13:21,756 --> 00:13:22,835
Alfred, come.
299
00:13:29,472 --> 00:13:32,441
I'm sorry, guys. I can't
do the Bong Pong-a-thon.
300
00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,687
Shelly really put her foot down.
301
00:13:34,712 --> 00:13:36,661
Hey, we're gonna break you out.
302
00:13:36,686 --> 00:13:38,855
Wait, why are you whispering?
303
00:13:38,967 --> 00:13:41,520
Oh, I don't know. Duh.
304
00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,909
It's useless. She's...
she's got me on lockdown.
305
00:13:43,965 --> 00:13:46,412
It's cool. We got a plan.
306
00:13:46,412 --> 00:13:47,551
Does your plan involve
307
00:13:47,552 --> 00:13:49,491
trying to pose my wife with a naked guy
308
00:13:49,492 --> 00:13:51,451
and then using the
pictures as blackmail?
309
00:13:51,452 --> 00:13:53,381
No!
310
00:13:53,382 --> 00:13:55,391
We need a new plan.
311
00:13:55,392 --> 00:13:57,451
I've got one.
312
00:14:03,402 --> 00:14:05,411
Well, isn't today your lucky day?
313
00:14:05,412 --> 00:14:06,815
- Can I help you?
- No.
314
00:14:06,911 --> 00:14:08,501
But I can help you.
315
00:14:08,502 --> 00:14:09,961
Really?
316
00:14:09,962 --> 00:14:11,825
Jack Slenderson, Clypac Vacuums.
317
00:14:11,850 --> 00:14:13,759
I'm sure you've heard of us.
318
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,404
We're one of the big dogs
in the vacuum community.
319
00:14:16,404 --> 00:14:17,513
I haven't.
320
00:14:17,514 --> 00:14:21,403
- Excuse me.
- W-wait, uh, shoes off!
321
00:14:21,404 --> 00:14:23,473
Now, when the science doctors at Clypac
322
00:14:23,474 --> 00:14:25,373
set out to revolutionize
323
00:14:25,374 --> 00:14:26,503
the way we suck shit up off the floor,
324
00:14:26,504 --> 00:14:29,353
they knew they had to
think outside the box.
325
00:14:29,354 --> 00:14:32,935
Which is why this comes in a case.
326
00:14:32,936 --> 00:14:34,025
That's still a box.
327
00:14:35,129 --> 00:14:37,842
May I... cunt-inue?
328
00:14:38,374 --> 00:14:40,132
See that blue cord?
329
00:14:40,157 --> 00:14:41,943
That blue cord hooks up to the Internet.
330
00:14:41,944 --> 00:14:43,848
That's what really makes the R2D2
331
00:14:43,849 --> 00:14:45,306
so incredibly special.
332
00:14:45,306 --> 00:14:47,523
Now, the R2D1 did not
have several features.
333
00:14:47,524 --> 00:14:49,483
Obviously, you've got some
nice fancy lights here,
334
00:14:49,484 --> 00:14:50,683
but it's incredibly functional.
335
00:14:51,276 --> 00:14:52,954
In fact, let's fire it up right now!
336
00:14:52,954 --> 00:14:55,220
You feel that power?
337
00:14:55,221 --> 00:14:57,037
You feel the power in your pussy?
338
00:14:57,038 --> 00:15:00,026
It's like Christmas
following a Sunday morning!
339
00:15:00,027 --> 00:15:02,627
- It's very loud!
- You know who hates this sound?
340
00:15:02,652 --> 00:15:04,752
- Dirt.
- I do, too!
341
00:15:19,628 --> 00:15:21,717
Oh, uh, excuse me. Do you
know where the sign-in is?
342
00:15:21,718 --> 00:15:23,242
Oh, yeah, sure!
343
00:15:23,243 --> 00:15:26,172
It's just right up inside my
sister's stretched-out pussy.
344
00:15:26,174 --> 00:15:28,074
Oh.
345
00:15:29,194 --> 00:15:31,153
Did she say it was
in her sister's pussy?
346
00:15:31,154 --> 00:15:32,874
"Stretched-out pussy."
347
00:15:32,875 --> 00:15:35,462
You did it, man. You got Nugget.
348
00:15:35,462 --> 00:15:37,858
Yeah. Some of the competition
around here is pretty mean.
349
00:15:37,882 --> 00:15:41,801
The key to bong pong is extreme focus.
350
00:15:41,802 --> 00:15:43,851
Like, laser-fucking foc...
351
00:15:43,852 --> 00:15:45,862
holy shit, man, look!
352
00:15:47,204 --> 00:15:49,223
Okay, come on. Let's go do this.
353
00:15:54,381 --> 00:15:56,430
Here we are at the 36th Annual
354
00:15:56,455 --> 00:15:57,534
Bong Pong-a-thon.
355
00:15:57,852 --> 00:15:59,851
Where does the time go, huh, Gary?
356
00:15:59,852 --> 00:16:02,691
It's un-fucking-believable, Jerry.
357
00:16:02,692 --> 00:16:04,901
It really is. Really is.
358
00:16:04,902 --> 00:16:06,831
First-round matches are underway
359
00:16:06,832 --> 00:16:08,751
and right now, Team Brain Damage'd
360
00:16:08,752 --> 00:16:10,741
find themselves in the
middle of a real bong burner
361
00:16:10,742 --> 00:16:12,741
with the Frat Buds.
362
00:16:12,742 --> 00:16:14,721
Hey, just...
363
00:16:17,522 --> 00:16:20,341
Team Brain Damage'd
working off the dust.
364
00:16:20,366 --> 00:16:21,575
Right again, Jer-bear.
365
00:16:21,902 --> 00:16:24,229
Come on! What's going on?
366
00:16:24,254 --> 00:16:25,651
I don't know. I... I'm nervous, I guess.
367
00:16:25,802 --> 00:16:28,259
Nervous? You're... you're
a fucking brain surgeon.
368
00:16:28,260 --> 00:16:29,289
Yeah, but that's different.
369
00:16:29,291 --> 00:16:31,320
This is the Bong Pong-a-thon.
370
00:16:31,522 --> 00:16:32,601
The stakes are so high!
371
00:16:32,626 --> 00:16:34,485
Just try and relax and have some fun.
372
00:16:34,486 --> 00:16:35,565
How am I supposed to relax and have fun?
373
00:16:35,566 --> 00:16:37,566
Yeah!
374
00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:41,635
Why don't you let 'er
rip there, Nuggles?
375
00:16:43,686 --> 00:16:45,576
Whoa!
376
00:16:52,526 --> 00:16:53,556
Wow!
377
00:16:58,269 --> 00:17:00,002
That was a huge hit, Gary!
378
00:17:00,027 --> 00:17:01,584
He's really taking it up a notch.
379
00:17:01,585 --> 00:17:03,475
I wasn't even looking.
Totally missed it, Jerry.
380
00:17:09,387 --> 00:17:10,958
Yes!
381
00:17:11,044 --> 00:17:12,534
The doctor is in!
382
00:17:12,535 --> 00:17:13,644
He's a brain surgeon.
383
00:17:13,645 --> 00:17:15,574
I am a brain surgeon.
384
00:17:38,485 --> 00:17:40,634
That's what I'm talking about!
385
00:17:40,635 --> 00:17:42,555
- Whoo!
- It's awesome!
386
00:17:45,435 --> 00:17:47,445
Whoa!
387
00:17:50,545 --> 00:17:53,120
Our championship match is set.
388
00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:55,119
To no one's surprise,
our returning champions,
389
00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:58,047
the Tamp-Bongs, have made it
all the way into the finals.
390
00:17:58,072 --> 00:18:00,001
But the real story here is
that of their competitor.
391
00:18:00,002 --> 00:18:02,390
Coming out of a 25-year retirement,
392
00:18:02,390 --> 00:18:03,519
Team Brain Damage'd.
393
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:05,162
At some point, you have
to ask yourself, Jerry,
394
00:18:05,187 --> 00:18:06,505
"Who gives a shit?"
395
00:18:06,506 --> 00:18:08,495
All right, what is going
on with you, Gary?
396
00:18:08,496 --> 00:18:10,555
Susan left me. She took the kids.
397
00:18:10,556 --> 00:18:13,515
Jesus.
398
00:18:13,516 --> 00:18:15,435
Do I have to stay here
for the rest of this?
399
00:18:15,436 --> 00:18:16,525
Yeah.
400
00:18:18,986 --> 00:18:21,777
Shelly, I would have to be a real maniac
401
00:18:21,802 --> 00:18:25,295
to have collected all of the dog shit
402
00:18:25,296 --> 00:18:26,965
from your neighborhood
403
00:18:26,990 --> 00:18:30,019
and pour it right here on your carpet.
404
00:18:30,020 --> 00:18:31,999
Uh, don't. Don't!
405
00:18:32,452 --> 00:18:34,309
Oh, you did that!
406
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:35,880
- Oh!
- Oh, look at that.
407
00:18:36,024 --> 00:18:38,310
- Ugh!
- You ready for the magic?
408
00:18:38,311 --> 00:18:39,370
Yeah.
409
00:18:46,411 --> 00:18:47,540
Well, that's not good.
410
00:18:47,541 --> 00:18:49,500
Well, hang on now, hang on.
411
00:18:49,501 --> 00:18:52,360
I could just... maybe if I just...
412
00:18:52,361 --> 00:18:53,440
- oh, yeah.
- Oh.
413
00:18:53,441 --> 00:18:55,340
- Wh...
- That's just
414
00:18:55,341 --> 00:18:56,420
pushing the shit deeper
415
00:18:56,421 --> 00:18:57,470
into the fibers of your carpet.
416
00:18:57,471 --> 00:18:59,895
Oh.
417
00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:02,132
Now the peanut butter has mixed.
418
00:19:02,157 --> 00:19:05,191
It looks like a Reese's
Pieces, but a shit version.
419
00:19:05,192 --> 00:19:07,046
Here we are. It all comes down to this.
420
00:19:07,046 --> 00:19:08,629
One bong to one bong.
421
00:19:08,693 --> 00:19:10,732
What was that name
again? Team Tamp-Bongs?
422
00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:12,743
What, do you shove
bongs up your p-chenks?
423
00:19:14,419 --> 00:19:15,902
Team Brain Damage'd doing their best
424
00:19:15,927 --> 00:19:16,946
to psych those girls out.
425
00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:19,826
Shove this, cheese dick.
426
00:19:21,817 --> 00:19:23,936
Shit!
427
00:19:23,937 --> 00:19:26,006
Oh, my eye. I can't see.
428
00:19:26,007 --> 00:19:27,936
If Team Brain Damage'd
doesn't make this shot,
429
00:19:27,937 --> 00:19:29,806
- they're out.
- Like me.
430
00:19:29,807 --> 00:19:31,026
Right out of the condo.
431
00:19:31,027 --> 00:19:32,846
I can't see! I can't do it!
432
00:19:32,847 --> 00:19:33,906
Yes, yes! Hey, listen to me!
433
00:19:33,907 --> 00:19:36,976
Yes. Yes, you can.
434
00:19:36,977 --> 00:19:38,856
Okay.
435
00:19:38,857 --> 00:19:40,016
Remember your training.
436
00:19:40,017 --> 00:19:42,966
- "Trust the process."
- Go deep inside.
437
00:19:42,967 --> 00:19:44,926
- Deep inside.
- Come on.
438
00:19:44,927 --> 00:19:47,886
- Okay.
- Shh.
439
00:20:01,897 --> 00:20:03,636
No good! It's no good!
440
00:20:03,637 --> 00:20:05,948
It's all over. The
Tamp-Bongs have won it.
441
00:20:05,973 --> 00:20:07,962
- Was I close?
- No, not even cl...
442
00:20:07,963 --> 00:20:10,072
oh, take the blindfold off.
443
00:20:10,073 --> 00:20:12,229
Don't know why you did that.
You couldn't see already.
444
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:13,627
- Oh.
- You didn't have to
445
00:20:13,627 --> 00:20:14,766
- add another...
- I was trying to use the Force.
446
00:20:14,767 --> 00:20:16,666
I guess I'll go back to Spencer's Gifts.
447
00:20:16,667 --> 00:20:18,566
I'm sorry it didn't work out, Weasel.
448
00:20:18,567 --> 00:20:20,586
- It's cool, man.
- Tell him, "Me, too."
449
00:20:20,587 --> 00:20:22,182
You can tell him yourself.
He's right there.
450
00:20:22,207 --> 00:20:24,626
O-oh, I'm sorry I let you down, Weasel.
451
00:20:24,627 --> 00:20:27,656
But, hey, at least we won in '87, right?
452
00:20:27,657 --> 00:20:30,596
- What?
- What?
453
00:20:30,597 --> 00:20:32,151
You won the tournament before?
454
00:20:32,176 --> 00:20:35,585
- Yeah, 1987.
- Oh, that's right, man!
455
00:20:35,587 --> 00:20:36,746
That's totally right!
456
00:20:38,951 --> 00:20:40,170
Okay, later, 'gator.
457
00:20:40,171 --> 00:20:42,070
Finally done.
458
00:20:42,071 --> 00:20:44,010
You wanna get out of
here and get some food?
459
00:20:44,011 --> 00:20:46,060
I'm just gonna take some
pills. I'll watch you eat.
460
00:20:52,071 --> 00:20:54,060
- Hey, Pac?
- What?
461
00:20:54,061 --> 00:20:56,950
I know you think this whole thing
462
00:20:56,951 --> 00:20:58,010
was a waste of time,
463
00:20:58,011 --> 00:21:00,030
but I just wanted to say thanks.
464
00:21:00,031 --> 00:21:02,971
I really needed something like this.
465
00:21:07,051 --> 00:21:08,160
Oh, oh, hey!
466
00:21:08,161 --> 00:21:11,020
If you ever need brain surgery,
467
00:21:11,021 --> 00:21:12,150
give me a call.
468
00:21:12,151 --> 00:21:13,990
I will.
469
00:21:13,991 --> 00:21:16,150
And I will.
470
00:21:16,151 --> 00:21:19,001
- Let's get you inside.
- All right.
471
00:21:20,131 --> 00:21:23,110
I don't really think that's
doing much of anything.
472
00:21:23,111 --> 00:21:25,101
Do you have a vacuum cleaner?
473
00:21:26,151 --> 00:21:29,010
Are you seriously asking me that?!
474
00:21:29,011 --> 00:21:31,070
That's about all the time
we have for today's demo.
475
00:21:31,071 --> 00:21:32,940
I hope you've enjoyed what you've seen
476
00:21:32,941 --> 00:21:34,715
and, uh, if you have any feedback,
477
00:21:34,716 --> 00:21:38,855
negative or positive, please fill out a
customer response survey at Clypacs. edu
478
00:21:40,715 --> 00:21:42,664
Dot E-D-U?
479
00:21:46,442 --> 00:21:48,884
Listen, you can hear it
in my chest. Ah-hh-hh...
480
00:21:48,885 --> 00:21:50,804
The first thing I want everyone to know
481
00:21:50,805 --> 00:21:54,774
is that I'm feeling good
and sharper than ever.
482
00:21:54,775 --> 00:21:58,664
These chairs are way better
than cash, am I right?
483
00:21:59,655 --> 00:22:00,854
Yeah, I was mad at first,
484
00:22:00,855 --> 00:22:03,664
but I'm not complaining. It
feels great on my shoulder.
485
00:22:03,665 --> 00:22:06,844
I think I overworked it when
I ruined that lady's home.
486
00:22:06,845 --> 00:22:10,674
First off, I am banning
eggs on Tuesdays.
487
00:22:11,546 --> 00:22:14,784
No more eggs from sundown
to sunup on Tuesdays,
488
00:22:14,785 --> 00:22:16,854
unless, of course, you're left-handed.
489
00:22:16,855 --> 00:22:20,844
This guy is finally starting
to make some sense.
490
00:22:20,845 --> 00:22:22,855
Of course, I'm left-handed,
so I'm biased, but...
34151
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
