Original subtitles

[ DOOR CREAKS ]

[ CHILDREN GIGGLING ]

[ OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ DOOR CREAKS ]

BOO!

OH! [ CHUCKLES ]

YOU SCARED ME.

BOO!

[ SIGHS ]

I GOT YOU THIS TIME.

OKAY, NOW, YOU GUYS ARE GOOD,

BUT ARE YOU READY FOR ME TO SCARE YOU?

YEAH. OKAY.

DID YOU BRING US ANOTHER DEADTIME STORY?

OF COURSE I DID.

IT'S CALLED "ALONG CAME A SPIDER."

I HATE SPIDERS.

SHE'S AFRAID OF THEM.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

NAH. I'M NOT AFRAID OF SPIDERS.

WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T MET THIS ONE.

WHAT'S SO SCARY ABOUT HIM?

YOU WANT TO FIND OUT?

[ CHUCKLES ] OKAY.

CHAPTER 1.

"MIKEY DAVIS FROZE

"AS A THOUSAND HAIRY LEGS CREPT ACROSS THE CARPET.

'OH, MAN!' MIKEY THOUGHT."

"WE'RE ALL ALONE IN MY ROOM.

"HOW DID THIS THING GET IN HERE?

"THIS CREEPY CREATURE WAS SLITHERING UP

"MY BEST FRIEND, MAX, READY TO ATTACK.

"BEFORE MIKEY COULD MAKE A SOUND,

THIS HAIRY-LOOKING CREATURE DID JUST THAT."

[ VIDEO GAME BEEPING ]

UH, MAX?

Shh.

[ BEEPING CONTINUES ]

MAX.

MAX.

UGH! LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?

NOTHING'S WRONG WITH ME,

BUT YOU'VE GOT A THOUSAND-LEGGER

CRAWLING ACROSS YOUR SHOULDER.

[ WHOOSHES ]

HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT TO BET THAT WAS HEADED FOR YOUR EAR?

AW, MAN. THAT'S JUST GROSS.

NO, THAT'S JUST GROSS.

DON'T YOU EVER CLEAN YOUR EAR?

YOU'VE GOT, LIKE, A POTATO FARM GROWING IN THERE.

SHUT UP. AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE BUGS IN MY ROOM.

I DIDN'T HAVE ANY BUGS, EITHER,

UNTIL YOU OPENED YOUR SUITCASE.

IT'S YOUR BUG. NOW GET RID OF HIM.

NO WAY! I'M NOT TOUCHING THAT THING!

YOU GET RID OF HI!

MAKE COSMO GET THE BUG!

COSMO? ARE YOU KIDDING?

COSMO'S NEVER GONNA GET THAT BUG.

HE'S A DOG, NOT A CAT.

I BET I CAN GET HIM TO EAT IT.

[ WHIMPERS ]

I TOLD YOU.

JUST STOMP ON IT.

I DON'T WANT TO TOUCH IT! YOU GET IT!

NO WAY!

GREAT. NOW WE'VE GOT TO GO FIND IT.

[ GASPS ]

[ BLOWS ]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

BLOWING ON IT.

I READ SOMEWHERE THAT IF YOU BLOW ON BUGS,

THEY STAY STILL.

IT SCARES THEM OR SOMETHING.

WHOA. TOO COOL.

[ BLOWING ]

I'LL BLOW. YOU SMASH.

[ BLOWING ]

EWW!

NOW YOU'VE GOT BUG GUTS ON THE BOX!

HEY! YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU HAD A DISSECTING KIT.

I FORGOT I HAD IT.

MUST HAVE GOTTEN IT AS A GIFT OR SOMETHING.

CHECK THIS OUT!

GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME.

THIS KIT IS COOL.

LET'S CUT SOME STUFF UP.

WHAT ABOUT SKATING?

I'M SURE MY MOM WOULDN'T MIND TAKING US TO THE ICE RINK.

AND BESIDES, SHE OUGHT TO BE HOME SOON.

NOT IF YOUR SISTER SHOPS THE WAY MINE DOES.

THEY'LL BE GONE FOR HOURS.

YOU'RE RIGHT. LET'S CUT SOME STUFF UP.

[ Muffled ] LET'S DO HIM FIRST.

RIBBIT!

SERIOUSLY?

YOU REALLY ARE GROSS.

MAYBE WE SHOULD READ THE INSTRUCTIONS

ON HOW WE'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS FIRST.

NAH. I JUST SAY WE START CUTTING AWAY.

[ THUD ]

YOU'RE DISGUSTING.

HOW CAN YOU EAT WHILE YOU'RE DISSECTING?

OOH.

WHO KNEW FROGS HAD SO MANY GUTS?

WHAT DO YOU THINK THESE TWO BLUE BLOBBY THINGS ARE?

OH, MAN. I HOPE YOU NEVER DECIDE TO BE A DOCTOR.

WHY NOT? THIS IS KIND OF COOL.

I WOULDN'T MIND FINDING OUT WHAT'S INSIDE OF PEOPLE.

I'M PRETTY SURE THE PEOPLE WOULD MIND.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

YOU'VE GOT A GARBAGE DISPOSAL IN YOUR SINK, RIGHT?

YEAH. WHY?

I'M GONNA GET RID OF THE GUTS.

JUST... DON'T TELL MY MOTHER

YOU PUT FROG GUTS DOWN THE DRAIN.

SHE'LL FREAK.

[ GARBAGE DISPOSAL GRINDING ]

[ GRINDING STOPS ]

AND...DON'T TELL HER THAT, EITHER.

OKAY. WHO'S NEXT?

LET'S DO HIM NEXT.

YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF SPIDER IT IS FIRST?

NOT REALLY.

IT'S CALLED AN ARACHNIA-SOMETHING-OR-OTHER,

AND IT COMES FROM SOUTH AMERICA.

HE LOOKS PRETTY COOL.

LISTEN TO THIS.

"A CROSS BETWEEN THE GIANT TARANTULA

"AND THE VENOMOUS BLACK WIDOW,

THIS SPIDER IS FAR MORE DEADLY THAN EITHER VARIETY."

MAYBE...WE SHOULDN'T TOUCH THAT THING IF IT'S POISONOUS.

THEY WOULDN'T HAVE PUT IT IN THE KIT IF IT WAS DANGEROUS.

BESIDES, IT'S DEAD.

THEN HOW COME YOU'RE NOT USING YOUR FINGERS THIS TIME?

THIS IS ONE FREAKY-LOOKING SPIDER.

[ BOTH GASP ]

[ EERIE MUSIC PLAYS ]

♪ WHEN YOU HEAR THE SCREAM ♪

AAH!

♪ HIDE UNDER THE BLANKET ♪

♪ DON'T COME OUT ♪

♪ IT'S NOT A DREAM ♪

♪ DON'T YOU SLEEP ♪

♪ THIS IS YOUR NIGHTMARE NOW ♪

AAH!

HOLY SMOKES! THAT SPIDER'S ALIVE!

HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!

QUICK! GET HIM BACK IN THE JAR!

YOU GET HIM BACK IN THE JAR.

I'M NOT TOUCHING A KILLER SPIDER.

YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LET HIM OUT!

BLOW ON HIM!

MAYBE HE'LL FREEZE, LIKE THE MILLIPEDE.

THEN I CAN SMASH HIM.

[ BLOWING ]

GOT HIM!

HOW COME HE DIDN'T SMUSH?!

WHERE'D HE GO?

THERE'S NO WAY

I'M LETTING A POISONOUS SPIDER RUN AROUND MY HOUSE.

I THINK I MIGHT BE AFRAID OF SPIDERS NOW.

[ CHUCKLES ] ME TOO.

YOU DON'T THINK THERE'S POISONOUS SPIDERS

RUNNING AROUND OUR HOUSE, DO YOU?

I HOPE NOT.

I DON'T THINK YOU GUYS HAVE ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

POISONOUS SPIDERS ARE PRETTY RARE, AND I DON'T THINK

YOU HAVE ANY RUNNING AROUND YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD.

I KNOW ONE THING, THOUGH.

WHAT'S THAT?

I'M GETTING RID OF THE DISSECTING KIT

MY UNCLE GOT ME FOR MY BIRTHDAY.

WHY? DOES IT HAVE SPIDERS IN IT?

NO, BUT IT HAS A BUNCH OF OTHER CREEPY-CRAWLERS,

AND I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ANY CHANCES.

[ CHUCKLES ]

YOUR DISSECTING KIT IS JUST FINE.

IT'S JUST A STORY, REMEMBER?

YOU KNOW, I USED TO HAVE A DISSECTING KIT

WHEN I WAS A KID.

I LEARNED A LOT FROM IT.

YOU AND I SHOULD DO IT TOGETHER SOMETIME.

ALL RIGHT, SO, SHOULD WE SEE WHAT HAPPENS TO THE SPIDER?

Both: YEAH!

OKAY.

"MIKEY AND MAX SEARCHED THE KITCHEN NERVOUSLY,

"BUT THE SPIDER WAS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN.

"THEY WERE ABOUT TO GIVE UP,

WHEN A HORRIFYING SOUND CUT THROUGH THE AIR."

[ COSMO YELPS ]

COSMO! COSMO!

[ GROWLING ]

[ BARKING ]

LOOK!

[ BARKING ]

[ GROWLING ]

WHAT IS WITH THIS SPIDER?

I TOLD YOU NOT TO LET IT OUT OF THE JAR.

GET IT, BOY.

YEAH, SIC 'IM!

[ COSMO WHIMPERS ]

[ BARKING ]

[ GROWLING ]

IT LOOKS LIKE THE SPIDER WANTS TO GET COSMO.

[ HISSES ]

[ YELPING ]

NOW WHAT DO WE DO?

HEY, I GOT A GOOD IDEA.

START BLOWING ON IT. I'M COMING.

[ BLOWING ]

OKAY? READY?

ONE...TWO...THREE.

COME ON! HURRY UP, WILL YA?

I'M TRYING. I JUST DON'T WANT TO DROP THIS THING.

YOU TAKE OFF THE BOARD, WE'LL DUMP IN, AND I'LL FLUSH.

OKAY. JUST FLUSH FAST.

READY?

ONE...TWO...THREE. GO!

[ TOILET FLUSHES ]

YES! YES!

[ WATER SWISHING ]

[ GRUNTS ]

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

CLOSE THE LID!

DON'T TELL ME WE CAN'T EVEN GET RID OF THIS THING

BY FLUSHING IT.

DON'T DO THAT! IT'LL ONLY FLOOD MORE!

YOU THINK HE'S GONE?

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

WE CAN'T.

I WON'T FEEL SAFE UNLESS I KNOW THIS SPIDER'S HISTORY.

BESIDES, WE HAVE TO CLEAN UP ALL THIS WATER,

OR MY MOTHER WILL GO BALLISTIC.

OH, MAN.

I'M GLAD THAT'S OVER.

THAT MAKES TWO OF US.

GRAB A TOWEL. LET'S CLEAN THIS STUFF UP.

IT'S NOT OVER YET, IS IT?

NOT WITH ALL THESE PAGES LEFT.

DOES THE SPIDER COME OUT OF THE TOILET

AND BITE THEM ON THE BUTT?

[ LAUGHS ]

NOW, THAT WOULD BE BAD.

SHOULD WE FIND OUT?

"BY THE END OF THE DAY,

"AS MIKEY AND MAX GOT READY FOR BED,

THEY HAD COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE SPIDER."

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

[ Muffled ] WHO IS IT?

IT'S ME. LET ME IN.

I'M ABOUT TO TAKE A BATH.

I NEED TO BRUSH MY TEETH.

CAN'T YOU WAIT?

I GUESS.

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A SHOWER, LIKE I DID?

IT'S QUICKER.

I LIKE BATHS.

WELL, HURRY UP. I'M BORED.

SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW?

AAH!

MAX! MAX!

WHAT?! WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?!

THE SPIDER WE FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET -- IT'S NOT DEAD.

IT MUST HAVE BEEN CRAWLING THROUGH THE PIPES OR SOMETHING,

'CAUSE NOW IT'S IN MY BATHTUB!

HEY, GUYS! GUYS! WHAT'S ALL THE SCREAMING ABOUT?

WHAT'S GOING ON UP HERE?

THERE'S A KILLER SPIDER IN MY BATHTUB, DAD.

ALL RIGHT. HOLD ON, HOLD ON, ALL RIGHT?

I'M ON THE PHONE. ALL RIGHT?

HEY, RAY, I'M DEALING WITH SOMETHING HERE AT HOME.

CAN YOU JUST TALK TO A STRUCTURAL ENGINEER

ABOUT THE COLUMN SPACING, PLEASE, OKAY?

I'LL CALL YOU BACK IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES.

[ SIGHS ]

YOU'RE FREAKING OUT OVER A SPIDER?

NOT JUST A SPIDER, DAD.

A KILLER SPIDER IN OUR BATHTUB!

ALL RIGHT. I GOT TO SEE THIS ONE.

ALL RIGHT, GUYS, WHERE IS THIS KILLER SPIDER?

IT WAS IN THE TUB A MINUTE AGO, DAD. I SWEAR.

I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.

BUT, DAD, I STILL NEED TO TAKE MY BATH,

AND IF THAT SPIDER'S GONNA --

NO, NO, LOOK, YOU'RE GONNA TAKE YOUR BATH TOMORROW, OKAY?

YOU GOT TO GET YOUR BUTTS INTO BED NOW,

OTHERWISE, YOU'RE GONNA BE DEALING WITH A KILLER MOM.

LET'S GO.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

LEAVING.

AND WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GONNA GO?

YOUR PARENTS ARE AWAY.

WELL, I'M NOT STAYING HERE.

WHAT IF THAT SPIDER COMES TO GET US

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?

DON'T GO.

WE'LL FIND A WAY TO PROTECT OURSELVES.

[ DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE ]

THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA.

YEAH. I'M GLAD YOU HAD THIS DOUBLE-SIDED TAPE.

NOW IF THAT SPIDER TRIES TO GET ON THE BED,

IT'LL GET STUCK.

NOW HOPEFULLY WE CAN SLEEP.

I HOPE SO.

SPIDER!

HEY, HEY, HEY! GUYS! GUYS! WHAT'S GOING ON NOW?

IT'S BACK.

THE SPIDER?

YEAH! IT'S ON OUR CEILING!

IT BETTER BE.

[ SIGHS ]

ALL RIGHT, GUYS.

ENOUGH WITH THIS SPIDER ALREADY, OKAY?

OTHERWISE, THERE'S GONNA BE NOTHING BUT CHORES

IN YOUR FUTURE.

YOU GOT ME?

GET TO BED.

[ DOG BARKING ]

I GOT TO GET SOME SLEEP, OR I'M GONNA DIE.

ME TOO.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR MOM THREW US OUT OF THE HOUSE

FOR DUMPING OUT THE FLOWERS AND WAKING THEM UP.

I KNOW.

BUT SHE'LL BE GONE FOR A COUPLE HOURS.

MY SISTER HAS KARATE LESSONS.

WANT TO GO BACK INSIDE?

NO. I'M TOO TIRED TO MOVE.

LET'S JUST SLEEP OUT HERE.

[ DOG BARKING ]

UGH. COSMO.

[ COSMO WHIMPERING ]

[ GARAGE DOOR WHIRRING ]

[ COSMO BARKS ]

COSMO?

COME HERE, BOY.

THAT'S DEFINITELY COSMO.

YEAH. BUT...WHERE IS HE?

[ COSMO WHIMPERING ]

WHAT THE HECK?!

I THINK WE FOUND COSMO.

[ COSMO BARKS ]

WE HAVE TO GET HIM DOWN.

NO WAY. I'M NOT STAYING IN THIS GARAGE.

WE CAN'T JUST LEAVE HIM THERE.

YOU-KNOW-WHO MIGHT COME BACK AND EAT HIM.

DO YOU SEE THE SIZE OF THAT THING?

YOU-KNOW-WHO MIGHT COME BACK AND EAT US.

LET'S JUST GET OUT OF HERE.

NOT WITHOUT COSMO.

YEAH, BUT IF WE LEAVE HIM UP THERE,

WE'LL BE ABLE TO PROVE TO YOUR PARENTS

THAT WE REALLY DO HAVE A SPIDER PROBLEM.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

BUT BY THE TIME ANYONE GETS BACK,

HE COULD BE... YOU KNOW.

WELL, HURRY UP, THEN.

[ WHIMPERING ]

STAND UNDERNEATH HIM

SO WHEN I MAKE THE LAST CUT, YOU CAN CATCH HIM.

OKAY.

READY.

HERE WE GO.

[ YELPS ]

[ WHIMPERING ]

NICE CATCH.

YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE ONE LUCKY DOG.

[ WHIMPERING ]

COME ON, COSMO! HOLD STILL!

WE'RE TRYING TO HELP YOU.

[ Laughing ] HEY, BUDDY.

MISSED YOU.

YOUR MOM'S GONNA FREAK WHEN SHE SEES THIS DOG.

YEAH, TELL ME ABOUT IT,

ESPECIALLY SINCE HE JUST WENT TO THE GROOMER LAST WEEK.

YOU THINK WE SHOULD GIVE HIM A BATH?

[ YELPING ]

GREAT. NOW WE'LL NEVER CATCH HIM.

YOU CAN'T EVEN SPELL "BATH" BEFORE HE BOLTS.

WE OUGHT TO AT LEAST TRY TO CLEAN THE DRIVEWAY UP

SO WE DON'T GET IN TROUBLE FOR THAT, TOO.

YEAH.

I THINK THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH.

LET'S JUST HANG UP THE HOSE AND CALL IT QUITS.

I'M BEAT.

ME TOO.

[ GROWLS ]

WHAT THE HECK?!

[ SNARLS ]

UH-OH!

THAT FREAKY ARACHNID IS GROWING!

HOW CAN THAT BE?! I DON'T KNOW!

LET'S JUST GET OUT OF HERE! GO!

[ SNARLING ]

WHERE'D IT GO?

I DON'T KNOW.

QUICK! HIT THE BUTTON!

[ WHIRRING ]

HURRY UP ALREADY, YOU STUPID DOOR!

NOT FOR REAL!

HOLY SMOKES!

HOW BIG IS THAT THING?!

IT'S AS BIG AS US!

QUICK! HIT THE BUTTON!

OH, WE'RE GONNA END UP LIKE COSMO!

COME ON!

COME ON! COME ON ALREADY!

MAYBE IT'LL CRUSH HIM!

OHH!

NOW WHAT?!

UNLESS YOU WANT TO RUN PAST IT, I THINK WE'RE TRAPPED.

WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO FIGHT IT!

HOW?!

[ SNARLS ]

UH...BLOW ON IT!

SERIOUSLY?!

THERE'S NO WAY I CAN KEEP THAT SPIDER STILL!

NO. BUT MAYBE THIS CAN.

[ SNARLS ]

YOU HOLD IT STILL

WHILE I TRY TO CHOP OFF ITS LEGS WITH THE HEDGE CLIPPERS.

READY?

[ LEAF BLOWER WHIRRING ]

TAKE THAT, YOU ARACHNID!

IT'S WORKING!

GET HIM, MAX!

[ SNARLING ]

DON'T LET GO OF THE BLOWER! IT'S THE ONLY WEAPON WE HAVE!

YOU GOT TO GIVE ME A MINUTE TO FIGURE SOMETHING OUT!

I DON'T THINK WE HAVE MANY MINUTES LEFT, MAX!

KEEP BLOWING ON HIM, MIKEY! I THINK IT'S GONNA POP!

AAAAAAAAAAH!

[ GRUNTS ]

COME ON!

[ POP ]

YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!

YEAH!

YEAH!

IT'S GONE! YES!

PLEASE TELL ME THAT'S THE END OF THE SPIDER.

WELL, YOU KNOW IT'S NOT THE END OF THE STORY.

OKAY, SMART GUY, HOW DO YOU THINK THE STORY ENDS?

I THINK WHEN THE SPIDER BLOWS UP,

LOTS OF COMMANDO BABY SPIDERS PARACHUTE OUT OF THE SKY.

NOW, THAT WOULD BE AN ENDING.

IS THAT WHAT HAPPENS?

LET'S FIND OUT.

"MIKEY AND MAX STARED AT THE SKY FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE AN ETERNITY

"BEFORE THEY TURNED THEIR ATTENTION BACK TO EARTH

"AND CELEBRATED THEIR VICTORY

"WITH A COUPLE BOWLS OF ICE CREAM.

"THERE WAS NO SIGN OF THE SPIDER ANYWHERE,

"AND EVERYTHING WAS BACK TO NORMAL.

WELL, ALMOST EVERYTHING."

MAN. THAT WAS SO GOOD.

WANT SOME MORE?

NAH. LET'S JUST GET SOME CHIPS AND GO SHOOT SOME HOOPS.

GOOD IDEA.

[ WATER RUNNING ]

[ WATER GURGLES ]

WHAT WAS THAT?

YOU DON'T THINK THERE'S ANY WAY

THAT SPIDER LANDED SOMEWHERE AND CAME BACK, DO YOU?

I HOPE NOT.

[ GURGLING ]

WHATEVER IT IS, IT ISN'T RIGHT.

[ GURGLING ]

[ GURGLING CONTINUES ]

[ BOTH SCREAM ]

[ FROG CROAKS ] [ BOTH SCREAM ]

[ BOTH SCREAMING ]