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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,042 --> 00:00:06,214 {\an8}♪ 2 00:00:06,214 --> 00:00:08,299 Jeff: We're all seekers, right? 3 00:00:08,299 --> 00:00:09,718 I mean, that's why we got involved 4 00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:11,678 in this crazy thing in the first place. 5 00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:14,514 We're all looking for that next frontier. 6 00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:19,102 For some, it's California, for others, it's this colony. 7 00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:22,021 And, hey, for a few? It's something beyond. 8 00:00:22,021 --> 00:00:24,691 Wait, we're not talking about Jupiter here, are we? 9 00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:26,943 [ Laughs ] "Jupiters-lee" doesn't have 10 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:29,946 quite the same ring to it. [ Laughs ] 11 00:00:29,946 --> 00:00:31,656 When I stop and actually think 12 00:00:31,656 --> 00:00:34,242 about what we've accomplished in the past 30 years, 13 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:36,786 it's just like... [Imitates explosion] 14 00:00:36,786 --> 00:00:39,330 That being said, none of this could've happened 15 00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:43,126 without the enormous sacrifices of these rock stars. 16 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:51,009 {\an8}♪ 17 00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:54,012 Uh, how do we make this... less? 18 00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:56,639 I can speed it up. 19 00:00:56,639 --> 00:00:58,641 It's more of a symbolic list, right? 20 00:00:58,641 --> 00:00:59,934 [ Cell phone rings ] 21 00:00:59,934 --> 00:01:01,978 Yes, what is it? 22 00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:04,105 You're fucking kidding me. 23 00:01:04,105 --> 00:01:06,316 What kind of equipment? 24 00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:08,401 God Jesus fuck! 25 00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:10,487 [ Thunder crashes ] 26 00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:12,864 Darren: I mean, who you got watching the store down here, 27 00:01:12,864 --> 00:01:14,491 Geordi La-fucking-Forge? 28 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,993 It's not like this stuff just walked itself out of here. 29 00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:18,661 [ Cell phone ringtone ] 30 00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:21,539 Ah, shit. 31 00:01:21,539 --> 00:01:23,500 Brando! [Chuckles] That's so weird! 32 00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:24,834 I was just trying to call you. 33 00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:26,836 Hey, Dare, just got off the phone 34 00:01:26,836 --> 00:01:28,004 with our security chief, 35 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:29,881 who said you put some lunatic named 36 00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:32,592 Trevor Sullivan in charge of the investigation. 37 00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:35,678 He also said a bunch of new equipment was stolen overnight. 38 00:01:35,678 --> 00:01:36,971 What? No, no it's fine. 39 00:01:36,971 --> 00:01:38,389 I'm actually here with one of our guys and, 40 00:01:38,389 --> 00:01:40,308 truth be told, my money's on a miscount. 41 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,352 Some bad bookkeeping. My money's on you 42 00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:44,687 ignoring my very clear instructions to you. 43 00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:46,105 And now? 44 00:01:46,105 --> 00:01:48,942 We have the makings of a fucking coup on our hands. 45 00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:50,860 Well, I don't-- I don't know if this rises to the-- 46 00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:53,029 Dare. Dare? to the point of it being a-- 47 00:01:53,029 --> 00:01:54,405 Dare. something to, uh-- 48 00:01:54,405 --> 00:01:57,450 Dare, bud, it's over, okay? 49 00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:59,202 You were charged with managing a problem, 50 00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:00,662 and that problem has escalated 51 00:02:00,662 --> 00:02:03,206 into a colossal fucking liability. 52 00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:05,124 It's over. Time to punch out. 53 00:02:05,124 --> 00:02:07,752 [ Sighs ] Will do, boss. 54 00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:10,046 Listen, truth be told, I think we both know 55 00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:12,423 I never really had the belly for this security stuff. 56 00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:13,883 Better to mosey on back to the desk 57 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:15,385 and focus on the big picture. 58 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:17,387 Business. Commerce. Ideas-- 59 00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,180 No, Dare. Let me be clear. 60 00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:21,182 You are being let go. Wait, wh-what? 61 00:02:21,182 --> 00:02:23,351 And tell that grease monkey Sullivan to stand down! 62 00:02:23,351 --> 00:02:25,395 Wait, wait, Brandon, Brandon! 63 00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:26,604 Ah, shit. 64 00:02:26,604 --> 00:02:28,857 Hey! Where the fuck is Trevor Sullivan? 65 00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:41,578 {\an8}♪ 66 00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,913 [ Rats squeaking ] 67 00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:48,293 {\an8}♪ 68 00:02:48,293 --> 00:02:51,296 ♪ Oh, Danny boy, the pipes ♪ 69 00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:54,507 ♪ The pipes are callin' ♪ 70 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:57,886 ♪ From glen to fuckin'... ♪ 71 00:02:57,886 --> 00:02:59,596 Uh-oh! 72 00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:05,602 [ Whirring ] 73 00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,939 Please, oh, please, please something to eat. 74 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:12,442 Please. 75 00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:15,486 [ Whirring ] 76 00:03:18,072 --> 00:03:19,908 [ Rats squeaking ] 77 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:23,620 {\an8}♪ 78 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,163 Stand down, men. 79 00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:29,834 Today I cannot give you food, but I can give you honor. 80 00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:32,170 Aah! Ow! 81 00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,796 Dah! 82 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:54,150 {\an8}♪ 83 00:03:54,150 --> 00:03:58,363 [ Grunting ] 84 00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:01,282 [ Whirring ] 85 00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:03,952 Oh, no. Oh! 86 00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:06,621 Ay! 87 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:09,832 Jesus these rats-- will you listen to those things? 88 00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,668 Better hit the switch. 89 00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:14,504 [ Alarm blaring ] 90 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,048 [ Machinery whirring ] 91 00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:24,931 {\an8}♪ 92 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,891 [ Grunts ] 93 00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:34,941 {\an8}♪ 94 00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:37,819 [ Grunting ] 95 00:04:37,819 --> 00:04:42,573 {\an8}♪ 96 00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:46,119 [ Shouting ] 97 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,747 [ Grunting ] 98 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:55,461 God-- [ Clears throat ] 99 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:58,715 Metal-legged freak thinks he got rid of me. 100 00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:01,259 The party ain't fucking over yet. 101 00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:05,388 [ Cartoon music plays ] 102 00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:14,731 I understand you "had a fright," 103 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,733 Hubert, but I think it's time to leave. 104 00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,484 Fright?! Dear girl. 105 00:05:18,484 --> 00:05:21,112 Like it or not, I was almost murdered! 106 00:05:21,112 --> 00:05:23,197 Hubert, I shouldn't have to explain this. 107 00:05:23,197 --> 00:05:25,241 None of us can risk being seen together. 108 00:05:25,241 --> 00:05:27,410 You need to leave my fucking apartment. 109 00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:32,582 She said, menacingly, to her injured comrade in need of aid. 110 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,751 [ Knock on door ] 111 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:39,047 {\an8}♪ 112 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:41,883 Who's checking password? You're going to just let me in? 113 00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,217 Leaves! 114 00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:45,970 My adrenals are shot and you bring me roughage? 115 00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:48,681 I will not stand for this! 116 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:53,352 [ Grunting ] 117 00:05:53,352 --> 00:05:55,271 Ah... 118 00:05:55,271 --> 00:06:00,777 {\an8}♪ 119 00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:03,071 Oh... no... 120 00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:05,239 Oh... 121 00:06:05,239 --> 00:06:07,492 fuck... 122 00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:09,077 [ Grunting ] 123 00:06:09,077 --> 00:06:11,329 Aah! 124 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:13,331 ...me! 125 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:14,999 Ohh. 126 00:06:14,999 --> 00:06:17,960 {\an8}♪ 127 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:20,171 [ Groaning ] 128 00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:25,927 {\an8}♪ 129 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:27,637 Fuck! 130 00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:32,809 {\an8}♪ 131 00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:34,435 [ Chuckles ] 132 00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:43,402 {\an8}♪ 133 00:06:43,402 --> 00:06:45,738 Heh heh, whoa! 134 00:06:45,738 --> 00:06:48,366 Is something funny? 135 00:06:48,366 --> 00:06:50,576 Uh, I don't-- What's your name? 136 00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,537 Greg? You're fucking fired, Greg. 137 00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:53,955 Is that funny? Uh... 138 00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:55,498 [ Mocking ] Uh... Uh... 139 00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:56,749 Uh, uh, uh. 140 00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:59,669 Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. 141 00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:03,381 Oh, God, what is that smell? 142 00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,133 Good morning, big boy. 143 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,509 Get the fuck out of my chair. 144 00:07:06,509 --> 00:07:08,761 You know it's against IT security protocol 145 00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:09,929 to leave passwords out. 146 00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:11,472 Oh, Mary! Wh-- Is that rat piss? 147 00:07:11,472 --> 00:07:13,683 But in this case, it was for the best. 148 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:16,602 I took a little tour around the personnel database. 149 00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:19,564 Turns out there's exactly one metal-legged 150 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,816 fat fucking terrorist up here. 151 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:24,068 [ Scoffs ] Hubert Danielson? 152 00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:27,321 Founder of the Wine and Roses society is the terrorist? 153 00:07:27,321 --> 00:07:28,781 Correctamundo. 154 00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:31,951 What's he terrorizing, the God damn pastry case? 155 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:33,995 O-Okay, please, you got to stop. 156 00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:35,496 I'm getting the pus out of my lungs. 157 00:07:35,496 --> 00:07:37,456 We got to fuckin' get this guy. 158 00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,834 [ Inhales, exhales sharply ] 159 00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:41,752 Let me break something down to you. 160 00:07:41,752 --> 00:07:43,963 You are a fuck up, okay? 161 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:45,506 With a fucked-up life. 162 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:47,592 And now you fucked my life up. 163 00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,177 So here's what I need you to do. 164 00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:52,180 Get your ugly fucking alcoholic face out of here 165 00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:54,557 and crawl back into whatever pissed-soaked corner 166 00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:57,018 of the colony you came out of, okay? 167 00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:59,228 Okay. Bye-bye. 168 00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:01,856 It sounds like maybe you want to let 169 00:08:01,856 --> 00:08:03,524 these terrorist fucks win. 170 00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:06,235 Almost like you might be one of them yourself. 171 00:08:06,235 --> 00:08:08,237 Matter of fact... 172 00:08:08,237 --> 00:08:10,072 maybe I should kill you right now. 173 00:08:10,072 --> 00:08:12,325 Whoa, whoa! Okay, all right. 174 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:16,078 Right, um, yeah, no, l-let's go get Hubert. 175 00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:44,148 {\an8}♪ 176 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:45,816 [ Sniffs ] 177 00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:49,820 [ Sniffs ] 178 00:08:49,820 --> 00:08:57,036 {\an8}♪ 179 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,621 [ Door opens, radio chatter ] 180 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:01,165 All right, Sullivan, let's make this nice and easy. 181 00:09:01,165 --> 00:09:04,168 You son of a bitch, you set me up. 182 00:09:04,168 --> 00:09:12,593 {\an8}♪ 183 00:09:12,593 --> 00:09:14,720 Aah! 184 00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,306 [ Coughing ] 185 00:09:17,306 --> 00:09:27,858 {\an8}♪ 186 00:09:27,858 --> 00:09:30,945 Okay, bozos. You got me. 187 00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:32,822 Now you just got to bring me in. 188 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:38,619 {\an8}♪ 189 00:09:38,619 --> 00:09:40,913 [ Laughing ] 190 00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:44,792 Okay. I'm done. 191 00:09:48,587 --> 00:09:50,131 What is password? 192 00:09:52,049 --> 00:09:54,677 The directive was to stop stealing things. 193 00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,596 The hell's going on with you people? 194 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,389 No idea what you're talking about. 195 00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:01,517 I've just been here babysitting the dumb-dumb twins all day. 196 00:10:01,517 --> 00:10:04,186 There's reports of more missing equipment, 197 00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:05,980 this time from the hangar. 198 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:07,898 All this on top of Marsibration? 199 00:10:07,898 --> 00:10:09,150 Marsiversary. 200 00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:10,609 Marsiversary! 201 00:10:10,609 --> 00:10:13,362 Apparently some guards searched Hubert's quarters. 202 00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:15,948 They are on our trail. Are you kidding me? 203 00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:19,535 That fiendish minuteman is hunting me again! 204 00:10:19,535 --> 00:10:21,912 Oh, Hosanna on high! 205 00:10:21,912 --> 00:10:23,831 We need a better hiding place for Hubert. 206 00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:26,917 Di Wei, you seem to have plenty of free time. 207 00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:29,045 Can you find a place for him on your farm? 208 00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,504 No space! It's very full. 209 00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:32,048 So many radish this harvest. 210 00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,008 No more room for Hubert. I'm sorry! 211 00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:38,054 That wasn't a request, it's a God damn order! 212 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:41,349 I've been sitting on this board for over two decades. 213 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,059 That includes the Magellan disaster, 214 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:46,062 the Jeremy Fagen incident, and a whole host of other messes. 215 00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:49,231 For the first time, Brandon, I'm legitimately worried. 216 00:10:49,231 --> 00:10:51,192 I mean, what is going on here? 217 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:54,070 Locusts? Expensive assets going missing? 218 00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,238 Mole people? Susan, Susan. 219 00:10:56,238 --> 00:10:58,074 Do these mole people have firearms? 220 00:10:58,074 --> 00:11:00,993 Susan! There are no mole people, 221 00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:03,204 there are no mole people with firearms. 222 00:11:03,204 --> 00:11:05,373 All the missing equipment is accounted for. 223 00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:07,750 And the locusts, as I've repeatedly explained, 224 00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:11,003 were a part of the experimental food program. 225 00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,089 Uh, really, the only thing we need to worry about 226 00:11:13,089 --> 00:11:18,052 is whether tomorrow's event is going to be too amazing, right? 227 00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:19,678 Hey, I need some water. 228 00:11:19,678 --> 00:11:21,931 Can I get a fucking water, please? 229 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:25,601 {\an8}♪ 230 00:11:25,601 --> 00:11:27,686 Slower, you hayseed! 231 00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:32,149 Oof! My buns, man! 232 00:11:32,149 --> 00:11:34,360 Please be cautious. 233 00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:40,574 How could we let one viper ruin everything? 234 00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:43,077 It's like underneath that bland veneer, 235 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:45,287 there's something truly cunning. 236 00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:46,455 Evil. 237 00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:49,208 He whips us into a frenzy, convincing us 238 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:53,462 to hasten our timeline, and then releases the locusts? 239 00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:54,964 It's diabolical. 240 00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:58,300 I am telling you, he is just a graphic designer. 241 00:11:58,300 --> 00:12:00,136 That's it. 242 00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:02,388 {\an8}♪ 243 00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:03,806 [ Laughter ] 244 00:12:06,183 --> 00:12:09,562 {\an8}Well, I guess, I just hope that the main idea of this place, 245 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,980 you know, the nucleus of it all... 246 00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:12,231 Oh, my God, Jeff. 247 00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:14,150 Tell me you had no idea about this. 248 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:17,945 No, of course not. Graphic designer. 249 00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:21,198 That, my dear, is a viper. You see, it's quite simple... 250 00:12:21,198 --> 00:12:24,076 We are about to be his next victim. 251 00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:26,162 Something's not right. This isn't Jeff. 252 00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:27,663 This can't be Jeff. 253 00:12:27,663 --> 00:12:30,666 Well, I'm just another branch on the tree. 254 00:12:30,666 --> 00:12:32,793 Di Wei: Listen, Hubert. Listen to me carefully. 255 00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:35,588 I have three hiding options in my farm. 256 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,047 Option number one. 257 00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:39,633 We put a cabbage leaf on your head and bury you 258 00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:42,595 to your neck in soil so you appear as cabbage. 259 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,722 [ Sighs ] With the hounds at the door, 260 00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:47,933 I thought you'd be able to suppress your foolishness. 261 00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:49,977 - But alas. - Silence. 262 00:12:49,977 --> 00:12:51,270 Option Two. 263 00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,189 We go to old tractor that is missing engine, 264 00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:54,857 we put you where the engine used to be. 265 00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:57,318 But whenever anyone walks past you must go, 266 00:12:57,318 --> 00:12:59,695 "Vroom, vroom," as engine. 267 00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:02,573 [ Sighs ] And option three? 268 00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:05,659 You stay here in root cellar with the door closed. 269 00:13:05,659 --> 00:13:08,871 I'm sure you can gather which option I prefer. 270 00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:11,207 Yes. Let me go fetch cabbage leaf. 271 00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:13,375 Big leaf for a very big boy! 272 00:13:13,375 --> 00:13:15,419 [ Chuckles ] 273 00:13:15,419 --> 00:13:21,217 {\an8}♪ 274 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,510 Jeff? 275 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:23,886 Hello? 276 00:13:23,886 --> 00:14:03,759 {\an8}♪ 277 00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:08,347 [ Wind whistling ] 278 00:14:08,347 --> 00:14:10,474 Where are you? 279 00:14:10,474 --> 00:14:27,700 {\an8}♪ 280 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,660 [ Grunting ] 281 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:33,872 {\an8}♪ 282 00:14:33,872 --> 00:14:35,958 [ Grumbles ] 283 00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:43,465 {\an8}♪ 284 00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:44,717 [ Laughs ] 285 00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:46,260 [ Creaking ] 286 00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:48,887 Oh, no. 287 00:14:48,887 --> 00:14:50,639 Aah! 288 00:14:50,639 --> 00:14:53,142 {\an8}♪ 289 00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:54,643 [ Groans ] 290 00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:55,978 [ Beep ] 291 00:14:55,978 --> 00:14:59,898 {\an8}♪ 292 00:14:59,898 --> 00:15:02,359 [ Groaning ] 293 00:15:02,359 --> 00:15:06,572 {\an8}♪ 294 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,240 Huh? 295 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,992 [ Laughs ] 296 00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,994 [ Coughs ] 297 00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:16,165 {\an8}♪ 298 00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:17,833 Hey, lil fella. 299 00:15:17,833 --> 00:15:19,835 [ Robotic gibberish ] 300 00:15:19,835 --> 00:15:22,087 [ Grunts ] 301 00:15:22,087 --> 00:15:24,673 [ Beeping ] 302 00:15:24,673 --> 00:15:32,306 {\an8}♪ 303 00:15:32,306 --> 00:15:34,683 Acquired. 304 00:15:34,683 --> 00:15:57,331 {\an8}♪ 305 00:15:57,331 --> 00:16:00,376 Whoo! Yeah! 306 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,336 Let's fuckin' do this. 307 00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:13,263 {\an8}♪ 308 00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:16,350 Mom! Look, Mars! They're on Mars! 309 00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:18,644 Wow! Pretty cool, bud. 310 00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:24,358 [ Screaming ] 311 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:56,932 {\an8}♪ 312 00:16:56,932 --> 00:16:59,393 Hey. You're Jeff's friend, right? 313 00:16:59,393 --> 00:17:02,646 Pfft. When he needs something, yeah. 314 00:17:02,646 --> 00:17:04,148 Well, I can't find him anywhere. 315 00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:05,733 Can you see him from up there? 316 00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,651 I left my asshole glasses at home, 317 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:10,529 so, no, I don't see him. 318 00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:12,531 It's important. 319 00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:13,907 Check backstage. 320 00:17:13,907 --> 00:17:16,702 You might find him in the social-climbers section. 321 00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:19,788 But my advice to you-- steer clear. 322 00:17:19,788 --> 00:17:21,874 Bro is toxic. 323 00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,500 He'll break your heart. 324 00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:25,377 Thanks. And... 325 00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:27,129 I found this. 326 00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:42,686 {\an8}♪ 327 00:17:42,686 --> 00:17:44,938 [ Sighs ] Aw, shit! 328 00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:47,399 Hey, Dare, looking a little put out. 329 00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:49,276 Need a hug? Uh, you know what, 330 00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:51,612 th-there's just a lot of serious stuff going on right now, 331 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:52,988 above your pay grade. 332 00:17:52,988 --> 00:17:55,491 Yeah, it's not all trust falls and gold stars out here, 333 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:56,784 I'm afraid to say. 334 00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:58,660 In fact, I've been talking to Brandon 335 00:17:58,660 --> 00:18:01,872 about another round of budget cuts and, uh, 336 00:18:01,872 --> 00:18:03,457 [Inhales sharply] it's looking like we may have to trim 337 00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,542 some of the Dreamspiration stuff. 338 00:18:05,542 --> 00:18:07,086 [ Chuckling ] Weird. 339 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:10,005 I wonder why he asked me to introduce Falco and not you. 340 00:18:10,005 --> 00:18:12,007 He knows I got more important stuff to do. 341 00:18:12,007 --> 00:18:14,134 Plus, you know, the whole diversity thing. 342 00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:16,678 It looks good having a woman up there. 343 00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:19,097 You know I did actually get a chance 344 00:18:19,097 --> 00:18:21,683 to talk to Falco, and your name came up. 345 00:18:21,683 --> 00:18:23,018 It did? 346 00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:25,229 Yeah, he said to say congratulations. 347 00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:27,105 Uh, congratulations for what? 348 00:18:27,105 --> 00:18:28,690 Oh, I thought you knew. 349 00:18:28,690 --> 00:18:31,485 The results came in and you won the competition 350 00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:33,195 for world's dumbest fuck. 351 00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:35,322 Whatever. I got stuff to do. I'm out of here. 352 00:18:35,322 --> 00:18:37,282 Oh, yeah, like what, huh? 353 00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:38,909 I know you got fired, Dare. 354 00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:41,161 What are you even doing back here? 355 00:18:41,161 --> 00:18:43,038 Hey! It's okay for me to be here! 356 00:18:43,038 --> 00:18:44,206 Is it though? 357 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:46,792 Uh, yeah. It is, actually. 358 00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,418 Whoa. Gentlemen. 359 00:18:48,418 --> 00:18:51,380 Whoop-whoop! Pull over. Pull over. 360 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,006 This is an actual emergency. 361 00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:56,635 I need to confiscate all the alcohol on the premises... 362 00:18:56,635 --> 00:19:00,889 'cause it's time to get fucked up! 363 00:19:00,889 --> 00:19:04,518 This little piggy gettin' lit. This little piggy gettin' lit. 364 00:19:04,518 --> 00:19:06,228 This little piggy gettin' lit. 365 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,647 This little piggy ain't getting shit. 366 00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:09,898 [ Laughs ] 367 00:19:09,898 --> 00:19:11,692 Yo, Dace. You get a double. 368 00:19:11,692 --> 00:19:15,028 Hmm. [ Laughs ] 369 00:19:15,028 --> 00:19:18,991 {\an8}♪ 370 00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,410 [ Grumbling ] 371 00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:25,539 {\an8}♪ 372 00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:28,333 [ Robotic gibberish ] 373 00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:31,503 [ Beeping ] 374 00:19:31,503 --> 00:19:34,006 You think you can hide? 375 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:36,466 Not from me. 376 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:39,970 One step closer to the target. 377 00:19:39,970 --> 00:19:42,598 One step closer to justice. 378 00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:44,808 {\an8}♪ 379 00:19:44,808 --> 00:19:48,604 [ Hubert groaning ] 380 00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,568 What? Who is it? 381 00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:55,903 Who's there? 382 00:19:55,903 --> 00:19:57,487 I go to Marsiversary now. 383 00:19:57,487 --> 00:19:59,948 Would you like any hors d'oeuvre from buffet? 384 00:19:59,948 --> 00:20:01,950 M-Meat, cheese! 385 00:20:01,950 --> 00:20:03,702 Anything but vegetables. 386 00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,454 Okay, vegetable. You got it. 387 00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:08,457 No! No! Anything but vegetables, you twit! 388 00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,375 Yes, I hear you loud and clear. 389 00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:13,295 I bring you back a nice, crunchy carrot. 390 00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:15,130 Oh, my God... 391 00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:17,966 Hey, my friends are back there. 392 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,384 We actually got separated, 393 00:20:19,384 --> 00:20:22,846 so if there's any way you could just let me in. 394 00:20:22,846 --> 00:20:33,607 {\an8}♪ 395 00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:37,319 Mars.ly knows how to party, am I right? 396 00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:38,862 Oh, hell yeah! 397 00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:42,574 I was supposed to meet someone here but I don't see him. 398 00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:45,077 Well, I see your ass, and you're lookin' pretty good. 399 00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:48,205 Hey, any chance you're heading back to VIP? 400 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:49,665 Room for one more? 401 00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:51,667 There's always room for one more. 402 00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:54,461 Grab a VIP pass for my new VIP. 403 00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:56,338 Where they been hiding you anyway? 404 00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:57,839 [ Chuckles ] The bio labs 405 00:20:57,839 --> 00:21:00,259 at the bottom of building two, actually. 406 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,510 Bio lab, huh? 407 00:21:01,510 --> 00:21:04,805 Maybe later we can do a little experimentin'. 408 00:21:04,805 --> 00:21:06,682 Yeah, maybe. 409 00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:18,694 {\an8}♪ 410 00:21:18,694 --> 00:21:20,070 How we doing? 411 00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:22,656 So far so good. 30 seconds to show time. 412 00:21:22,656 --> 00:21:25,367 No surprises? No surprises. 413 00:21:25,367 --> 00:21:27,619 Fuck yeah. Welcome to the Marsiversary 414 00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:30,247 30th interplanetary all-hands broadcast. 415 00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:32,958 [ Cell phone ringing ] 416 00:21:34,209 --> 00:21:36,086 Please give me a warm Mars.ly welcome 417 00:21:36,086 --> 00:21:39,381 to a Dreamspiration great who needs no introduction, 418 00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:41,842 our very own Reagan! 419 00:21:44,428 --> 00:21:46,221 [ Cheers and applause ] 420 00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:52,185 {\an8}♪ 421 00:21:52,185 --> 00:21:55,272 Ha-ha. Wow. 422 00:21:55,272 --> 00:21:57,149 Here we are! 423 00:21:57,149 --> 00:22:00,193 [ Cheers and applause ] 424 00:22:00,193 --> 00:22:04,072 You know, when I look out into this audience 425 00:22:04,072 --> 00:22:06,491 I see a lot of people I recognize. 426 00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:08,577 You might call them coworkers. 427 00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:10,412 Or friends. Sure. 428 00:22:10,412 --> 00:22:14,750 But I prefer the term "family." 429 00:22:14,750 --> 00:22:17,085 Why are we a family? 430 00:22:17,085 --> 00:22:18,962 Well, we've got a lot in common. 431 00:22:18,962 --> 00:22:21,465 We're bold. We like to take risks. 432 00:22:21,465 --> 00:22:25,510 We all have the same favorite color-- red. 433 00:22:25,510 --> 00:22:27,637 [ Laughter ] 434 00:22:27,637 --> 00:22:30,599 We like to break stuff that needs to be broken. 435 00:22:30,599 --> 00:22:34,519 We got that Mars.ly swagger! 436 00:22:34,519 --> 00:22:37,189 [ Laughter ] 437 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,067 Keep on going. Keep on going... 438 00:22:40,067 --> 00:22:44,404 Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock... 439 00:22:44,404 --> 00:22:46,573 Keep on going. 440 00:22:46,573 --> 00:22:48,533 [ Buzzer ] 441 00:22:48,533 --> 00:22:50,118 Uh-oh... 442 00:22:50,118 --> 00:22:51,912 Keep on going. Keep on going... 443 00:22:51,912 --> 00:22:54,706 There's a rabbit in the garden, Farmer McGregor! 444 00:22:54,706 --> 00:22:55,999 Keep on going. 445 00:22:55,999 --> 00:22:57,959 [ Gasps ] Oh, dear. 446 00:22:57,959 --> 00:22:59,669 The hell's wrong with you? 447 00:22:59,669 --> 00:23:02,005 There's nothing under there. 448 00:23:02,005 --> 00:23:05,258 Hey. Hey! I'm talking to you. 449 00:23:05,258 --> 00:23:08,637 {\an8}♪ 450 00:23:08,637 --> 00:23:11,306 [ Gasps, sighs ] 451 00:23:11,306 --> 00:23:15,852 {\an8}♪ 452 00:23:15,852 --> 00:23:17,229 [ Glass shattering ] 453 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:20,065 [ Robotic gibberish ] 454 00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:22,359 Please... 455 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:23,944 help me. 456 00:23:23,944 --> 00:23:26,154 Oh, I'm gonna help you, big boy. 457 00:23:26,154 --> 00:23:28,490 We're gonna help each other. 458 00:23:28,490 --> 00:23:31,660 And now, the reason why we're here. 459 00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:34,496 He's the man with the plan-et. 460 00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:37,833 Ladies and gentlemen, Earthlings and Martians, 461 00:23:37,833 --> 00:23:41,878 I give you Falco! 462 00:23:41,878 --> 00:23:44,714 [ Cheers and applause ] 463 00:23:44,714 --> 00:23:59,146 {\an8}♪ 464 00:23:59,146 --> 00:24:03,984 [ Air whooshing ] 465 00:24:03,984 --> 00:24:10,115 30 years, 30 years of us being a multi-planet species. 466 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:14,452 Official citizens of the mother-snoggin' universe. 467 00:24:14,452 --> 00:24:17,080 Now how cool is that? 468 00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:18,498 G'day all of yous 469 00:24:18,498 --> 00:24:21,084 in sunny California and around the world... 470 00:24:21,084 --> 00:24:24,379 and g'day to all the colonists up there on Mars. 471 00:24:24,379 --> 00:24:27,966 It's a real sacrifice what you're doing up there. 472 00:24:27,966 --> 00:24:30,177 There's all these beautiful waterfalls 473 00:24:30,177 --> 00:24:32,095 and rivers down here. 474 00:24:32,095 --> 00:24:34,431 Nah, I'm just pulling your leg. 475 00:24:34,431 --> 00:24:36,391 [ Sighs ] I bet it's brilliant up there 476 00:24:36,391 --> 00:24:38,435 and I'll be joining you soon. 477 00:24:38,435 --> 00:24:40,145 Don't worry, I just got to get 478 00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:42,355 my fill of these gorgeous beaches here, 479 00:24:42,355 --> 00:24:45,567 and then I'll be on the next one up! 480 00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:55,535 {\an8}♪ 481 00:24:55,535 --> 00:24:57,245 Can I help you? 482 00:24:57,245 --> 00:24:59,456 I'm looking for Jeff. Have you seen him? 483 00:24:59,456 --> 00:25:00,874 Actually, I have not. 484 00:25:00,874 --> 00:25:02,250 And he better be in hair and makeup 485 00:25:02,250 --> 00:25:04,502 because he's on in less than five. 486 00:25:06,463 --> 00:25:09,591 Pick it up, fat body. Hurry it on up. 487 00:25:09,591 --> 00:25:12,135 Help... please... 488 00:25:12,135 --> 00:25:14,471 This bandit has accosted me. 489 00:25:14,471 --> 00:25:16,890 Keep on going. Keep on going. 490 00:25:16,890 --> 00:25:19,017 {\an8}♪ 491 00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:20,852 Oh, God. Sorry. 492 00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:24,231 Yo, science chick, where'd you go? 493 00:25:24,231 --> 00:25:27,400 Tee, I told you I met a hot-ass scientess! 494 00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:30,487 So, science, that's an interesting topic. 495 00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:34,407 Tell me, how do grasshoppers become locusts? 496 00:25:34,407 --> 00:25:36,159 Hey, have you seen, Jeff? 497 00:25:36,159 --> 00:25:40,372 Jeff? Are you fucking serious? I love Jeff. 498 00:25:42,290 --> 00:25:44,167 Everything okay here, sir? 499 00:25:44,167 --> 00:25:45,835 At ease, soldier. 500 00:25:45,835 --> 00:25:48,463 You know, I actually built this thing if you can believe it. 501 00:25:48,463 --> 00:25:49,881 Yep. 502 00:25:49,881 --> 00:25:51,716 I mean, it was based on a prototype and everything, 503 00:25:51,716 --> 00:25:54,636 but it's, uh... 504 00:25:54,636 --> 00:25:57,138 Just make sure you get home safe, sir. 505 00:25:57,138 --> 00:26:04,104 {\an8}♪ 506 00:26:04,104 --> 00:26:06,606 A big thanks to everyone down here, 507 00:26:06,606 --> 00:26:08,400 up there, and everywhere else. 508 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:12,153 Especially my number two, that little dildo, Brandon. 509 00:26:12,153 --> 00:26:13,571 Where are you, mate? 510 00:26:13,571 --> 00:26:16,491 Poor bastard's like a beaten dog, look at him. 511 00:26:16,491 --> 00:26:21,871 {\an8}♪ 512 00:26:21,871 --> 00:26:24,874 Yeah, we had a good run, didn't we, old girl? 513 00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:30,297 And of course, none of this would be possible 514 00:26:30,297 --> 00:26:32,590 without Jesus Christ, the Word of God 515 00:26:32,590 --> 00:26:37,137 made flesh who redeemed man by His death on the cross. 516 00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:40,557 Ah, yes. And the creative director. 517 00:26:40,557 --> 00:26:44,728 So I wanted this celebration to be 100% "made on Mars." 518 00:26:44,728 --> 00:26:47,314 And, boy, did this guy deliver. 519 00:26:47,314 --> 00:26:48,982 Look at this. 520 00:26:48,982 --> 00:26:51,067 Is that-- Is that-- 521 00:26:51,067 --> 00:26:53,945 Oh, man. The Tasmanian devil. 522 00:26:53,945 --> 00:26:56,781 But that's not-- That's just my son playing a trick. 523 00:26:56,781 --> 00:26:59,034 - It's a game we play. - Hey, Dad saw Taz! 524 00:26:59,034 --> 00:27:01,536 - We hide Taz. - Hey, guys! Guys! Dad saw Taz! 525 00:27:01,536 --> 00:27:02,746 [ Door slams open ] 526 00:27:02,746 --> 00:27:04,873 Has anyone seen Jeff? 527 00:27:04,873 --> 00:27:07,459 Where is Jeff Cooper? 528 00:27:07,459 --> 00:27:10,962 Oh, shit, I actually ran into playboy earlier. 529 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:13,548 Yeah, superstitious playa was doing luck rituals 530 00:27:13,548 --> 00:27:15,175 with his joojoos and shit. 531 00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:17,344 Said he was gonna rub Santa's belly. 532 00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:18,636 [ Chuckles ] 533 00:27:18,636 --> 00:27:22,390 Bloody beautiful work, all those posters. 534 00:27:22,390 --> 00:27:25,310 So, let's bring the artist up. 535 00:27:25,310 --> 00:27:26,895 Jeff Cooper. 536 00:27:26,895 --> 00:27:29,064 [ Applause ] 537 00:27:29,064 --> 00:27:48,792 {\an8}♪ 538 00:27:48,792 --> 00:27:51,252 [ Murmuring ] 539 00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:57,258 [ Sammy Hagar's "Right Now" plays ] 540 00:27:57,258 --> 00:28:06,601 {\an8}♪ 541 00:28:06,601 --> 00:28:08,061 What are these pictures? 542 00:28:08,061 --> 00:28:10,563 Where is that fucking music coming from? 543 00:28:12,232 --> 00:28:15,777 Keep on going. Keep on going. 544 00:28:15,777 --> 00:28:17,737 Give 'em hell, Sully. 545 00:28:17,737 --> 00:28:23,243 {\an8}♪ 546 00:28:23,243 --> 00:28:25,495 Brandon, you think you can shut that thing 547 00:28:25,495 --> 00:28:27,414 the fuck off, please? 548 00:28:29,165 --> 00:28:31,960 Jeff: Jax, a little boy from central Florida 549 00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:35,672 once told me the past can be a prison if you let it. 550 00:28:35,672 --> 00:28:39,843 {\an8}♪ 551 00:28:39,843 --> 00:28:42,220 About five clicks north of the Beckett Crater, 552 00:28:42,220 --> 00:28:44,472 there's an unusual rock formation. 553 00:28:44,472 --> 00:28:47,851 It's the kind of place that has no memory. 554 00:28:47,851 --> 00:28:50,812 No past. 555 00:28:50,812 --> 00:28:52,522 The future is waiting. 556 00:28:52,522 --> 00:28:54,899 {\an8}♪ 557 00:28:54,899 --> 00:28:57,986 You just got to know where to look. 558 00:28:57,986 --> 00:29:01,614 I could use a friend to help me get my project on wheels. 559 00:29:01,614 --> 00:29:04,659 Fireheart. 560 00:29:04,659 --> 00:29:07,495 [ Beeping ] 561 00:29:07,495 --> 00:29:10,457 Brandon! Turn the fucker off! 562 00:29:10,457 --> 00:29:16,171 ♪ Don't wanna wait till tomorrow ♪ 563 00:29:16,171 --> 00:29:18,339 Fibo-nach. 564 00:29:18,339 --> 00:29:21,009 How ya doing? 565 00:29:21,009 --> 00:29:25,346 ♪ One by one, little problems ♪ 566 00:29:25,346 --> 00:29:29,058 ♪ Build up, and stand in our way ♪ 567 00:29:29,058 --> 00:29:31,227 ♪ Oh ♪ 568 00:29:31,227 --> 00:29:33,480 ♪ One step ahead, one step behind it ♪ 569 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:36,858 Keep on going. Keep on going. Keep on going. Keep on going. 570 00:29:36,858 --> 00:29:40,278 Stop the show, I found the fucking terrorist! 571 00:29:40,278 --> 00:29:41,529 [ Crowd gasps ] 572 00:29:41,529 --> 00:29:44,574 Please, I beg you. Do as the man says. 573 00:29:44,574 --> 00:29:47,869 ♪ Yesterday ♪ 574 00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:49,412 Brandon! 575 00:29:49,412 --> 00:29:51,206 ♪ Turn this thing around ♪ 576 00:29:51,206 --> 00:29:52,373 ♪ Right now ♪ 577 00:29:52,373 --> 00:29:55,960 ♪ Hey, it's your tomorrow ♪ 578 00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,420 ♪ Right now ♪ 579 00:29:57,420 --> 00:30:01,216 ♪ Come on, it's everything ♪ 580 00:30:01,216 --> 00:30:02,550 ♪ Right now ♪ 581 00:30:02,550 --> 00:30:04,761 ♪ Catch your magic moment ♪ 582 00:30:04,761 --> 00:30:08,181 ♪ Let's do it right here and now ♪ 583 00:30:08,181 --> 00:30:44,133 {\an8}♪ 584 00:30:44,133 --> 00:30:45,593 {\an8}Trevor: Stop the show! 39993

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