Original subtitles

(man on TV) 'New from Krank Co.'

'The Cosmo Flyer!'

Awesome!

(man on TV) 'With the Cosmo Flyer'

'the sky's the limit.'

'It's up, up, and away!'

For fim-foobley fun.

I can't think of a toy more fun for a child..

...or one more dangerous.

Just ask Timmy Snyder.

[whimpering]

[all gasp]

(Bruce) 'Or Reese Jones, who went on a wild ride'

over three counties before authorities could save him.

The Cosmo Flyer is yet another in a long line

of unsafe products from Krank Co.

The same people who brought us the Krank Bots..

'And the Zoom Pets..'

- Aah! - Aah!

Flame-retardant they weren't.

Today, I am happy to report that, thanks to the efforts

of Wayne Industries' Project Safety Net

the doors of Gotham-based Krank Co.

have been permanently shut.

(Krank) You thought my toys

were dangerous before, Wayne?

Krank?

Well, get a load of the new model.

It's doo-diddly deadly.

[theme music]

beep

vroom

boom

[music continues]

vroom

clang

boom

[all screaming]

whoosh whoosh

[beeping]

[engine turns over]

Can Bruce come out and play?

No? Oh, he's buried under a building?

Aww.

You like playing with toys, Krank?

Try mine.

swish

[dramatic music]

Broke your toy. Boo-hoo!

click click click

Uhh!

Refill sold separately.

Uhh!

vroom

whoosh

Whoa! Dipsy doodles!

[automated message] 'Auto pilot on.'

whoosh

[intense music]

[grunts]

clang

[laughs]

I own your weak bat butt!

(James) 'When Krank finds out you survived, Mr. Wayne'

he's sure to try again.

That's why I'm assigning you

around-the-clock police protection.

I really don't think that's necessary, commissioner.

It's not open for debate, Mr. Wayne.

I won't allow Gotham's favorite son

to be harmed on my watch.

Thank you, Commissioner Gordon.

Let me introduce you to your shadow.

Cash Tankenson, the last line of defense you'll ever need.

Hey, Freddy! How about some more of those nachos?

Extra jalapenos this time.

Straight away, detective shades.

Yo, Wayne, you're supposed to be

some kind of billionaire bachelor

so where's the par-tay?

The night is still young, detective.

Call me Cash, 'cause I'm not just your bodyguard, Wayne

I'm your wingman.

Yeah!

Cover for me, Alfred.

Time for the Batman to call a Krank

so we can send our houseguest home.

(Cash) 'Hey, Freddy! ETA on the nachos.'

Do hurry, sir.

beep beep

[upbeat music]

[doorbell rings]

Let me guess. You're not expecting visitors.

[alarm ringing]

Security breach.

Huh?

Special delivery.

No doubt from Cosmo Krank.

Looks like the Cos don't know

Cash spent a year on bomb squad.

'No sign of a proximity fuse.'

'Amateur hour.'

Someone at the door, Alfred?

Stay back, Wayne. It's Cash Tankenson show now.

"Ding Dong, you're doo-diddle done!"

I don't get it.

[beeping]

screech

[intense music]

swish swish

[grunts]

Careful, sir.

Freddy's right. Leave the rough stuff to the professional.

Who ordered the knuckle sandwich?

Extra knuckles!

[Cash grunting]

Huh?

Have another serving! Uhh!

[Bruce grunts]

swish swish swish

[whirring]

[Cash groans]

Uhh! Help! Uhh!

'Uhh! Get it off!'

It's payday.

Hyah!

slam slam

(Bruce) You got him.

Whew. Thanks, Cash. I owe you one.

Cash is as Cash does, man.

Dark night, isn't it?

I take your meaning, sir.

Uh, Master Bruce has an early meeting tomorrow.

Allow me to show you to the guest room.

That's not gonna work, Freddy.

Cash has to keep Wayne in his sights at all times.

We're roomies, pal.

Awesome.

And we just trashed a robot, compadre.

How can you be tired?

Cash is pumped and ready to party!

[snoring]

(Cash) 'Get down!'

Ah, I'm just doing my job, Mr. President.

[snoring]

Phew!

Sorry I'm late, commissioner.

Krank's made a second attempt

on Bruce Wayne's life tonight.

I have a man guarding him

but I could really use your help.

Let me keep an eye on Wayne instead.

I can catch Krank in the act.

No. Your talents are best used in the field.

We need to stop Krank--

Before he puts Wayne in danger again.

[bats screeching]

(Batman) I'm on my way to Krank's factory, Alfred.

I'm hoping to find something the police missed.

Just buy me more time if Cash asks after me.

No worries there, sir.

Your wingman is sleeping like a baby.

[snoring]

Oh. Ahem. Hey, Wayne.

Which way to the john?

[yawning] Okay, here we go. Let's see.

Ohh. Nah.

Um, occupied?

Oh. Uh, sorry, Freddy.

[mumbles]

Phew.

[dramatic music]

Huh?

[rumbling]

pop

[groans]

[music continues]

Surprise, Batman!

boom boom boom

Ahh!

crackle crackle

[bats screeching]

[snoring]

[switch clicks]

You must think Cash is pretty dumb.

Thought you could pull the wool over Cash's eyes, huh?

That's a negative.

I know where you were.

You were out...partying.

[sighs] You got me, Cash.

I don't know what to say, I--

Without your wingman.

You never, never leave your wingman.

You were sound asleep. I didn't wanna disturb you.

I don't let many people in, Wayne

but Cash has got feelings, too.

- Look, Cash-- - It's Detective Tankenson!

Only my friends call me Cash.

From now on, Mr. Wayne, we do this by the book.

Look, detective, I am really sorry I ran out on you

but I'm just not used to--

Not used to having a babysitter?

Well, get used to it now.

I'd rather have a wingman, Detective Tankenson.

My friends call me Cash.

So, Cash, think we could, uh, lose these now?

You know, the commish is kind of jittery about you

being out in the open for this park dedication ceremony.

I refuse to let a madman dictate how I live my life.

And I'm hopin' Krank tries something

so I can see the look on his face

when I take him down hard!

Back seat, Freddy. Cash Tankenson always drives.

Are you certain this is a good idea, sir?

It's the only way, Alfred.

If I don't let Krank get to Bruce

the Batman doesn't get to Krank.

[bats screeching]

[instrumental music]

[toy whirring]

It's Krank! Look out!

[panting]

Unh! Unh! Unh!

How 'bout we try on a pair of Cash Tankenson's size 13s?

My toy.

Oh. Uh...sorry, kid.

[crying]

Little help?

Wayne?

Wayne!

[rumbling]

Hey, Bruce Wayne, wanna go for a spin?

Come and get me, Krank.

[gunshots]

[men grunt]

Wayne!

[grunts] Help!

Help! Help!

[laughs]

Wayne!

[intense music]

[panting]

Drop Wayne or Cash drops you!

Whee-hee-hee!

Sorry, Cash. Have to rely on another wing man.

[upbeat music]

crackle

[breathlessly] Police! I'm commandeering this vehicle!

[tires screech]

[music on car radio]

[tires screech]

[music continues]

[tires screech]

[grunts]

No one shakes Cash Tankenson.

Welcome to Kranky Town, Wayne.

The play land children will never get to enjoy

all because of you!

Maybe my toys weren't the safest

but they were bim-boobly fun

and now you get to join my collection.

A little dip in my river of molten plastic and voila.

My very own limited-edition Bruce Wayne non-action figure.

[laughs]

What? Where's Wayne?

(Batman) Safely on his way home.

Ooh!

Time to put your toys away.

thud

Freeze, toy geek!

The Batman? Uh, where's Wayne?

Safely on his way home, apparently

but not for long.

beep

rattle rattle rattle

(Krank) With both of you out of the way for good

who will protect Wayne, hmm?

Zoom Pets now come with extreme mangling action.

Here, kitty, kitty. Catnip time.

splash

swish swish swish

Hyah!

[intense music]

[grunts]

Ahh-nn-nh!

[grunts] Got ya.

[chuckles] Who's got who?

Oh, no.

Whoa!

New from Krank Co.

battle-damaged detective.

[music continues]

[whirring]

Oh, Batman, dipsy doodles?

[Cash whimpers]

Come on, now, you can't turn Cash into a candle.

I got my whole life ahead of me.

Who's gonna care for my grandma?

Aah! Oof!

[whirring]

Huh?

Ahh.

I'm done playing nice, Batman.

I.. Where, where.. Where's my remote?

Here's why your toys need warning labels.

Some of this? Let's go. What?

No! What-what are you doing?

No! Zoom Pets, you can't do this! I created you!

[yelling]

Uh, about the whole Cash beggin' for his life thing

uh, that never happened, right?

[indistinct police radio chatter]

Detective, your assignment was to protect Bruce Wayne.

How do you explain Krank snatching him

from right under your nose? And where is Wayne?

Do you even know?

Well, he's, uh, safely on his way home.

Actually, the detective had my back, commissioner.

Cash is as Cash does, sir.

[sighs] I want your report on my desk first thing in the morning.

Hey, Wayne's a spoiled rich kid, but you, Bats, you're alright.

You need a wingman?

Hey!

That's cool. Cash prefers workin' alone.

[instrumental music]

[theme music]