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1
00:00:03,044 --> 00:00:04,671
SINGER:
* My eyes are gettin' weary*
2
00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:07,340
* My back is gettin' tight*
3
00:00:07,382 --> 00:00:09,259
* I'm sittin' herein traffic*
4
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:12,137
* On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
5
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:17,684
* But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
6
00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:23,356
* Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
7
00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:25,150
* 'Cause, baby, all my life*
8
00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:30,113
* I will be drivin' hometo you*
9
00:00:37,495 --> 00:00:38,663
No, sweetie,
it's no problem.
10
00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:40,206
We can come pick you up.
11
00:00:40,248 --> 00:00:42,083
Yeah. Okay.
We'll see you then.
12
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,209
Bye-bye.
13
00:00:43,251 --> 00:00:44,336
What are you doing?
14
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:45,837
The other day,
I cut out a coupon
15
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,547
to super-size your popcorn
for free at the movies,
16
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:50,216
and now I don't know
what I did with it.
17
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:51,760
Well, we have to leave
in a minute,
18
00:00:51,801 --> 00:00:55,597
so you may have to kiss
that dream good-bye.
19
00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:58,475
Why don't you just pay for
whatever popcorn you want?
20
00:00:58,516 --> 00:01:02,812
No. You're gonna pressure me
to get a medium.
21
00:01:02,854 --> 00:01:05,690
If I have the coupon,
it's out of our hands.
22
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:08,526
Who was that on the phone?
23
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:11,321
Uh, that was Kelly.
She's coming with us tonight.
24
00:01:11,363 --> 00:01:12,739
Oh, really?
25
00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:14,741
What? Would you rather
she sit at home alone
26
00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:17,660
depressed that she and
Deacon are separated?
27
00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:20,455
I wouldn't say rather.
28
00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:23,583
Well, she is coming,
so back it down.
29
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:26,252
Look, you know I feel bad
that they're not together.
30
00:01:26,294 --> 00:01:27,420
You know I do. It's just
31
00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:29,589
this threesome thing
is just brutal.
32
00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:31,341
They always seat you
at a table for 4,
33
00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:32,717
and then they whip away
that extra napkin
34
00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:36,179
and silverware.
It's very upsetting to me.
35
00:01:36,221 --> 00:01:38,431
Really? You didn't seem
that upset 2 nights ago
36
00:01:38,473 --> 00:01:41,601
when we went out
with just Deacon.
37
00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:43,645
It was a buffet.
38
00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:45,230
We've gone out
with Deacon alone,
39
00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:46,481
and now we're going
out with Kelly alone.
40
00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:47,816
They're both
our friends.
41
00:01:47,857 --> 00:01:49,442
Can we just be honest here,
please?
42
00:01:49,484 --> 00:01:51,528
Kelly is your friend,
Deacon is my friend.
43
00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:53,780
Why can't we just say it
out loud?
44
00:01:53,822 --> 00:01:55,615
Okay. Yes.
Kelly is my friend.
45
00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:58,785
She is my bestfriend,
okay?
46
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:00,495
And you are lucky
that I even agree
47
00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:01,746
to go out
with Deacon at all.
48
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:03,540
Okay?
This whole separation
49
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:05,208
is all his fault.
Am I wrong?
50
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,918
Tell me. Huh? Huh? Huh?
51
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,628
All right, let's not
have that fight again.
52
00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:12,340
Last time we did,
you yelled a lot and scared me.
53
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:13,883
But you did say that
it was good that he agreed
54
00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:15,510
to go to counseling
to work things out.
55
00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:16,886
Didn't you? Huh?
You did say that, huh? Huh?
56
00:02:16,928 --> 00:02:18,263
-Yes, that's true.
-Yeah!
57
00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:19,723
Yeah! Doesn't
feel so good
58
00:02:19,764 --> 00:02:22,475
when the huhs turn
against you, does it?
59
00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:23,977
All right, come on,
we're gonna be late.
60
00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:27,188
So tuck or suck something
in there, and let's go.
61
00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:28,481
I'm gonna tuck.
62
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:31,317
Oh, and by the way,
here's your coupon.
63
00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:32,944
And it's expired.
64
00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:36,781
Son of a b!
65
00:02:38,283 --> 00:02:39,826
I'm gonna try it anyway.
If they say anything,
66
00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,953
I'll pretend
I didn't notice.
67
00:02:44,372 --> 00:02:46,374
[DOORBELL RINGS]
68
00:02:53,048 --> 00:02:54,758
-Hi.
-Hey, Kel.
69
00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:56,217
'Sup, guys.
70
00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:57,594
Deac, you're here.
71
00:02:57,635 --> 00:03:00,680
What? Did you guys,
like, work things out?
72
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,223
No, Deacon's just here
watching the kids
73
00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:03,433
while we go out.
74
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:05,352
Oh. Well,
that's great, too,
75
00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:07,354
'cause, I mean,
together or apart,
76
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:09,689
you two
are both great.
77
00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:12,484
Like lamb chops
and mint jelly.
78
00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:18,573
Actually, mint jelly on it's
own, hmmm, not so great.
79
00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:19,866
I'm not saying which one
of you is mint jelly
80
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,451
and which one of you
is a lamb chop--
81
00:03:21,493 --> 00:03:22,744
Okay, honey, why don't you
suck on one of these?
82
00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:24,454
I'm gonna do that.
83
00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,748
So, Kel, what movie
do you want to see?
84
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:28,708
I don't know. I kinda
wanna see something mindless,
85
00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:30,543
like, uh,
what's that thriller
86
00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,712
where the earth is losing
its gravitational pull?
87
00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:35,882
Oh, Floaters.Yeah,
I'll see that. Okay, honey?
88
00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:38,468
Everything on the planet
is floating up into space?
89
00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:42,055
What part of me would not
want to see that movie?
90
00:03:42,097 --> 00:03:44,766
I thought we said we were
gonna see that together.
91
00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:46,893
Oh, right.
He's right.
92
00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:48,728
Can we see
something else?
93
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:50,438
I kinda really want
to see Floaters,though.
94
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,273
Yeah. Me, too.
95
00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:53,900
Guy?
96
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:55,652
Just see it with them.
97
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:58,905
Okay. But I'm gonna name
my popcorn Deacon.
98
00:03:59,989 --> 00:04:02,325
Sweet.
99
00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:03,410
All right, look,
I'm just gonna take
100
00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:04,661
the kids
back to Spence's.
101
00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:05,954
Put 'em to bed by 8:00.
102
00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:09,582
Kel, I know when to put
my kids to bed.
103
00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:11,001
-Just reminding you.
-No, you're just implying
104
00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,585
I don't know how to
take care of my own kids.
105
00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:13,795
Well, I guess
since you refuse
106
00:04:13,837 --> 00:04:15,505
to go to counseling,
I just assume
107
00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:17,090
that you really don't care
about much of anything.
108
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:18,925
An earth
with no gravity, huh?
109
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:21,469
I wonder if
they can get me up.
110
00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:24,556
Wait a minute.
You guys are not going
111
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,349
to counseling anymore?
112
00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:27,642
Apparently Deacon
doesn't think
113
00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:29,352
it's the best way for us
to solve our problems.
114
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:30,520
The therapist
is a woman
115
00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:31,980
whose husband
cheated on her.
116
00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:33,690
Yeah, Deacon wants
to find a therapist
117
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:35,942
who's in favor
of infidelity.
118
00:04:35,984 --> 00:04:37,652
I never touched
Angie, all right?
119
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:39,738
We had dinner a few times,
and it's over,
120
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:41,031
and I said I made
a mistake, okay?
121
00:04:41,072 --> 00:04:42,449
We don't need
a therapist
122
00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:44,075
to tell us the exact
same thing.
123
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,953
You guys hate to miss
the previews as much as I do?
124
00:04:49,039 --> 00:04:50,707
DOUG:
How beautiful was that?
125
00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:53,126
I hand the girl
a strategically folded coupon,
126
00:04:53,168 --> 00:04:54,794
hiding
the expiration date,
127
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,504
she hands me
a super-sized popcorn.
128
00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:57,672
Yeah, way to go.
129
00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,132
You outsmarted
a 13-year-old girl
130
00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:00,967
with an eye patch.
131
00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:05,847
Oh, my God.
Bill! Mickey!
132
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:08,141
Carrie.
Hey, how are ya?
133
00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:09,726
Good, everything's good.
134
00:05:09,768 --> 00:05:11,478
Bill and Mickey designed
the whole computer systems
135
00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:13,855
for our office.
This is my husband Doug
136
00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:14,981
and my friend Kelly.
137
00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:17,108
-Hi.
-Nice to meet you.
138
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,944
So, computers. I hear
they just boil down
139
00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:21,988
to a series
of ones and zeroes.
140
00:05:22,030 --> 00:05:23,698
Yeah,
pretty much.
141
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:25,033
I don't know how that means
I can get naked women
142
00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:27,535
on my screen, but
God bless you people.
143
00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:31,706
Should we decide who
gets this armrest now
144
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:32,957
or just let it
be a free-for-all
145
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:34,834
once the movie
starts?
146
00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:36,586
Well, you know,
I got pretty sharp nails,
147
00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,172
and I'm not afraid
to use 'em.
148
00:05:39,214 --> 00:05:40,882
It's all you.
149
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,557
I'm going to blow this up,
see?
150
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:51,017
This is an air mattress.
151
00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:52,602
This is where you're
gonna sleep.
152
00:05:52,644 --> 00:05:54,688
It's like sleeping on a raft.
153
00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:56,731
Why are you living here?
154
00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:59,567
It's a raft!
155
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,406
All right, look...
156
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,535
Here's the thing...
157
00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:12,914
I have to stay here for a while
because mommy and I are...
158
00:06:12,956 --> 00:06:14,708
taking a time out.
159
00:06:14,749 --> 00:06:16,710
Will you move
back home tomorrow?
160
00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:19,212
[STAMMERS] I... uh...
161
00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:21,756
Fish sticks are served!
162
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:22,882
God bless you.
163
00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:24,467
Yeah. I want you
to be careful
164
00:06:24,509 --> 00:06:26,678
'cause this plate
is piping hot,
165
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,473
and some Cheerios for
your little brother.
166
00:06:31,599 --> 00:06:34,561
[BABY TALK]
167
00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:38,690
So, what were
we talking about?
168
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:41,943
I don't like it here.
And I miss Mommy.
169
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,945
Hmm.
170
00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:45,905
Uh, do you mind if I--
171
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:47,198
Go ahead.
172
00:06:52,704 --> 00:06:57,125
Kirby, I could never
replace your mommy, and...
173
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:03,965
I would
never want to.
174
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:07,218
But I live
with your daddy now,
175
00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:12,474
and I think if
we try really hard,
176
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:14,893
we can build
a relationship
177
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:17,604
that's
completely our own.
178
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:18,938
Hey! You could
think of me
179
00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:21,274
as your step-Spence.
180
00:07:21,316 --> 00:07:23,651
Or your guy-mom.
181
00:07:29,657 --> 00:07:30,950
What have I done?
182
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:39,167
Well, that was the worst
piece of crap I've ever seen.
183
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:41,419
I know, and the ending
was so lame!
184
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,421
There's no gravity
so they build a roof
185
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:47,217
over the entire world?
I mean, come on.
186
00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:50,011
Yeah, it sucked.
Definitely sucked.
187
00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:51,346
Hey, look at that,
bulk candy.
188
00:07:51,388 --> 00:07:54,099
Finally I decide
how much I want.
189
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:55,517
I'm gonna go hit
the bathroom.
190
00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:57,143
Ooh, you know what?
I'm gonna stop off, too.
191
00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:58,520
It was very nice
meeting you.
192
00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:01,940
Yes, it was a pleasure
to meet you, too, Kelly.
193
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:05,985
Kelly. More like
smelly, am I right?
194
00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:09,948
You know, I was gonna ask
you. Um, she available?
195
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,533
I mean,
what's her situation?
196
00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:12,617
She's married.
197
00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:15,036
Actually,
she's separated.
198
00:08:15,078 --> 00:08:16,663
No, she's not.
199
00:08:16,705 --> 00:08:19,207
I mean, she is,
but it's like,
200
00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:20,375
if your favorite
plate breaks,
201
00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:21,710
the 2 halves
are separated,
202
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:24,462
but all you really need
is some Krazy Glue.
203
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,465
Yes, but until that plate
gets fixed,
204
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:30,135
then you maybe need to eat on a
new plate for a while.
205
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:35,390
Especially when one half of the
old plate refuses to go to
counseling.
206
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:36,725
You know what I'm saying, Bill?
207
00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:38,143
No, he doesn't know
what you're saying,
208
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:40,103
because I'm sure he,
like most people,
209
00:08:40,145 --> 00:08:43,606
has Krazy Glue in the house and
knows it dries pretty much
instantly.
210
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,525
Okay, I guess
what we're saying is
211
00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:47,444
we don't exactly know
where she's at.
212
00:08:47,485 --> 00:08:51,322
Okay, well, if she decides
to get back out there,
213
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,658
here's my card, and
you just have her call me.
214
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:55,493
Okay. Great.
215
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,037
Actually,
I'll see you next week.
216
00:08:57,078 --> 00:08:58,580
I gotta come in
and de-bug your system.
217
00:08:58,621 --> 00:08:59,664
All right. Well,
I'll see you then.
218
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:02,334
-Okay now.
-Okay, bye.
219
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:07,130
Yeah, better de-bug
your attitude, friend.
220
00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:08,590
Pardon?
221
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:09,966
What's up?
222
00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:11,259
Nothing.
223
00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:12,302
Come on, let's go.
224
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:14,304
Hon?
This way.
225
00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:16,973
Yeah, FYI, super-size
gets free refills.
226
00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:23,146
DOUG: I just don't see
how you could do that.
227
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:25,315
I didn't
do anything.
228
00:09:25,357 --> 00:09:27,609
I didn't even
give her the card.
229
00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:28,777
You set them up!
230
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:30,612
I introduced them, okay?
231
00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,238
They were sitting right
next to each other.
232
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,448
I also introduced you.
233
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:34,657
Does that mean
I'm setting you up
234
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:36,284
with the little one?
235
00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:38,703
Okay, first of all,
236
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:41,373
the little one
has a name.
237
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:44,542
I'm not sure what it is,
but he has one.
238
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,378
And it was very clear
what was going on there.
239
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,046
You're still mad
at Deacon,
240
00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:49,798
and you're trying to help
Kelly get back at him.
241
00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:51,466
Well, okay.
Maybe that's true.
242
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:52,801
But why shouldn't
she date?
243
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,010
He had his chance.
244
00:09:54,052 --> 00:09:55,303
I knew it!
Women hate men!
245
00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:56,596
Why do you
hate us so much?
246
00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:59,015
Is it 'cause we can pee
standing up?
247
00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:03,144
Oh, that makes you crazy,
doesn't it?
248
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,606
Who brings a bucket
of popcorn home from the movies?
249
00:10:06,648 --> 00:10:08,692
I mean,
who does this?
250
00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:11,403
Someone who thinks
when you're allowed
251
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:14,656
to get a free refill,
you get your free refill.
252
00:10:14,698 --> 00:10:17,492
It's called
good money management.
253
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,578
What are you lookin'
at that for?
254
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:21,746
You're not
actually thinking
255
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,373
of giving her
the guy's card, are you?
256
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:25,333
I'm thinking
about it, yes.
257
00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:26,418
Mm-hmm.
258
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,378
Okay, okay.
259
00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:30,171
Can I, uh, can I see it?
260
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:34,342
Well, come on.
261
00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:35,760
Let me hold it.
Come on.
262
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:37,512
-You're gonna rip it up!
-I'm not gonna rip it up.
263
00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:39,264
I just wanna see
his title and stuff.
264
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:42,267
I wanna see what kind
of guy's interested in Kelly.
265
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,436
She's my friend, too,
you know.
266
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,312
Come on. I promise
I won't rip it.
267
00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:47,814
Are you
gonna eat it?
268
00:10:49,441 --> 00:10:50,608
Hey, I'm a grown man.
269
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,277
I'm not gonna eat
the guy's card.
270
00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,114
Okay.
271
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,203
Here you go.
272
00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:06,166
-I can still rip it.
-Stop!
273
00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:07,500
You cannot
set Kelly up!
274
00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:10,378
That would be
like, like incest.
275
00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:11,838
How is that like incest?
276
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:16,509
Okay. Obviously, you don't
know what incest means.
277
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:19,721
No. Obviously...
278
00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:22,515
you don't know
what incest means.
279
00:11:22,557 --> 00:11:24,434
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
280
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:26,394
Hello?
281
00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:27,562
Hey, it's me.
282
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:29,064
Oh, hey, babe.
You all right?
283
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:31,149
KELLY: Yeah, I'm sorryif I was a downer tonight.
284
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,360
No, no, no.
You were great.
285
00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:35,236
I don't mean this as anything
against you guys,
286
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,406
but it kinda sucks
being the third wheel.
287
00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,241
You know what?
Hang on one second, okay?
288
00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:41,284
KELLY: Okay.
289
00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:42,535
[BEEP]
290
00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:44,120
-I wanna tell her about the guy.
-No!
291
00:11:44,162 --> 00:11:46,539
Doug, she is
feeling really down.
292
00:11:46,581 --> 00:11:48,166
I wanna give her
an ego boost.
293
00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,542
No, no. Maybe
she's just shaken
294
00:11:49,584 --> 00:11:51,252
over
the harsh reality
295
00:11:51,294 --> 00:11:53,797
that earth could lose
its gravitational pull.
296
00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:56,466
I'm telling her.
297
00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:58,593
-Kel?
-KELLY: Yeah?
298
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,261
You know Bill, the guy you met
at the movies tonight?
299
00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:01,429
Yeah, he thinks
you're ugly!
300
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:02,847
He's gay!
He's gay, he's gay!
301
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,557
Stop!
302
00:12:05,809 --> 00:12:07,352
Uh, when you were
in the bathroom--
303
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:08,520
Okay, you know what?
You do that and I swear
304
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:09,729
I will dump
your whole makeup case
305
00:12:09,771 --> 00:12:11,940
into the trash.
I'll do it.
306
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:14,526
He actually asked
if you were available.
307
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:15,819
He did?
308
00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:17,612
Bye-bye.
309
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,741
I'll fish
that out.
310
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:37,173
Man, these pigs in blankets
are incredible.
311
00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:39,092
Thanks, man.
312
00:12:39,134 --> 00:12:43,763
You know, I glazed
the wieners with brown sugar
313
00:12:43,805 --> 00:12:48,727
with just a touch of chili
powder to awaken peoples hidden
appetite.
314
00:12:50,395 --> 00:12:53,565
I'm uncomfortable,
but eating anyway.
315
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:55,734
Hey, guy.
316
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,610
Hey, the kids
are here.
317
00:12:57,652 --> 00:12:59,696
What a surprise.
What's up?
318
00:12:59,738 --> 00:13:01,865
Kelly asked me to baby-sit at
the last minute. Is that cool?
319
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,199
What, are you kidding?
I don't have to finish
320
00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:05,744
building Lego City
by myself.
321
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,203
Yeah, come on.
322
00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:09,205
And here's my little
major buh-buh,
323
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:12,042
you're so crazy.
Ha ha ha!
324
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:14,169
Come on.
325
00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:16,004
It's weird, man.
I mean...
326
00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:17,213
Kelly said she was
going out somewhere
327
00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:19,090
but she wouldn't say
with who.
328
00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,842
Pssh. Women.
329
00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:23,094
Hey, come on, man.
Let's watch the Knick game.
330
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,929
Hey, look,
white guy.
331
00:13:27,682 --> 00:13:29,059
They're funny.
332
00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:33,730
Wait.
333
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,857
You know who she's with,
don't you?
334
00:13:35,899 --> 00:13:37,734
Me? No.
335
00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:39,235
[SOFTLY]
No.
336
00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:49,037
No...
337
00:13:50,413 --> 00:13:53,750
[SIGHS] Sh-she might
be out on a date.
338
00:13:53,792 --> 00:13:55,168
Oh, man, I knew it!
339
00:13:55,210 --> 00:13:57,045
Well, who is it?
How'd she meet him?
340
00:13:57,087 --> 00:13:58,922
Actually,
Carrie knows the guy.
341
00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:00,757
We ran into him
last week at the movies.
342
00:14:00,799 --> 00:14:03,760
Floaters.Not worth
your time, by the way.
343
00:14:03,802 --> 00:14:04,844
I can't believe this.
344
00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:06,054
You set my wife up
on a date?
345
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:08,765
No, no!
I tried to stop it!
346
00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:10,100
Oh, man!
347
00:14:10,141 --> 00:14:11,226
Come on, guy, just relax,
all right?
348
00:14:11,267 --> 00:14:12,769
So she's out
with some loser.
349
00:14:12,811 --> 00:14:14,312
What's the worst thing
that could happen?
350
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,773
He could have sex
with my wife.
351
00:14:16,815 --> 00:14:19,359
Okay. Right. Yeah.
352
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:20,860
Okay, but then
you know what?
353
00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:22,278
You never slept
with that other woman.
354
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:24,864
So if Kelly sleeps
with this guy,
355
00:14:24,906 --> 00:14:26,116
she'd be in the wrong,
356
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:27,325
and that gives you
the upper hand.
357
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,661
Slap it high!
358
00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:35,333
Look, who's
the guy, man?
359
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,919
He's just some guy.
Your basic guy.
360
00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:41,089
Come on, man.
I gotta know.
361
00:14:41,131 --> 00:14:42,966
All right,
his name is Bill.
362
00:14:43,008 --> 00:14:46,219
Bill. What kind
of name is that? Bill.
363
00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:49,264
What's that short
for? William?
364
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,307
You know what he does?
365
00:14:51,349 --> 00:14:52,976
I think he designs
computer systems
366
00:14:53,018 --> 00:14:55,812
or something lame
like that.
367
00:14:55,854 --> 00:14:57,439
What does he look like?
368
00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,149
Nothing special.
369
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:00,316
I mean, you wouldn't even
give him a second look
370
00:15:00,358 --> 00:15:01,484
if he wasn't
dating your wife.
371
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:03,069
Oh, man!
Where'd they go?
372
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:04,154
I gotta get
a look at him.
373
00:15:04,195 --> 00:15:05,739
No, guy,
that's a bad idea!
374
00:15:05,780 --> 00:15:07,907
And anyway, I don't know
where they are!
375
00:15:07,949 --> 00:15:09,200
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
376
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:11,119
-Hello?
-Hey, babycakes.
377
00:15:11,161 --> 00:15:12,328
CARRIE [OVER PHONE]:
Hi, sweetie, how's the game?
378
00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:14,039
It's good.
It's good.
379
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:17,417
I just, uh... just wanted
to call and say hi.
380
00:15:17,459 --> 00:15:20,712
So, uh, tonight's
Kelly's date, right?
381
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:22,297
-Yeah.
-I was thinkin' about it,
382
00:15:22,339 --> 00:15:24,215
and maybe
it is a good thing.
383
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:27,302
Maybe it'll help her think
things through about Deac.
384
00:15:27,344 --> 00:15:29,346
CARRIE [OVER PHONE]:
Really, honey?
385
00:15:29,387 --> 00:15:31,765
Well, I'm glad
you came around.
386
00:15:31,806 --> 00:15:34,184
Yeah. Me, too. Me, too.
387
00:15:34,225 --> 00:15:37,437
So where'd they go,
anyway?
388
00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:41,816
I think they were just goingto a movie at the Loyola.
389
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,902
Oh. Great. Thanks.
390
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,487
For what?
391
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,407
What do you mean,
thanks?
392
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:50,784
I, uh, I mean, uh...
393
00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,494
thanks for bein'
the best damn thing
394
00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:55,121
that ever happened
to me.
395
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:57,290
Wait a minute!
396
00:15:57,332 --> 00:15:58,917
You're with Deacon.
397
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,920
DOUG [OVER PHONE]:
Got another call. I love you.
398
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,254
Oh, God.
399
00:16:09,219 --> 00:16:11,554
BILL: Then I went toSt. John's to get my master's,
400
00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:14,015
but I got sidetracked
into this computer thing.
401
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:17,769
Oh, really? My husband--
I mean, my ex--
402
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:19,396
my, uh, separated--
403
00:16:19,437 --> 00:16:20,480
Deacon.
404
00:16:20,522 --> 00:16:23,233
Yeah. He went
to St. John's.
405
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:25,235
God, I'm sorry
I keep mentioning him.
406
00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:26,945
I must be a real joy
to be with.
407
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,405
It's okay.
408
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:31,825
Maybe for an encore,
you can change my baby's diaper.
409
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,248
DOUG: I can't believe they made
me buy a ticket to do this.
410
00:16:38,289 --> 00:16:39,457
Oh. There they are.
411
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:42,293
Oh, all right, fine.
Okay, you saw them.
412
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:44,087
Come on. Time to go.
413
00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:48,508
Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
414
00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:49,926
I feel like
I gotta do somethin'.
415
00:16:49,968 --> 00:16:51,553
-What can you do?
-I don't know, man.
416
00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:53,471
Just seein' a guy,
you know?
417
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,848
He's good-lookin'.
418
00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,558
He designs computers.
419
00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:59,394
I'm just a delivery guy.
I'm a glorified donkey.
420
00:16:59,436 --> 00:17:01,855
Hey, stop putting
yourself down...
421
00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:04,441
and me in the process.
422
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:06,276
Why don't you go in there
and talk to her for me?
423
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:08,236
No. You can talk to her
after the date.
424
00:17:08,278 --> 00:17:09,946
I can't face her, man.
Just go in there
425
00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:12,198
and tell her I want
to go back to counseling.
426
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,450
I just don't think
that you--
427
00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:14,451
no, please, man.
428
00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:17,996
-For me?
-Oh ...ah...
429
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,130
Excuse me. I gotta get back
in there. Thanks.
430
00:17:27,172 --> 00:17:28,465
Sorry. Sorry.
431
00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:30,925
Ah, that was your foot
right there. Sorry.
432
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,052
Kelly.
433
00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:33,470
Doug, what are you
doing here?
434
00:17:33,511 --> 00:17:36,139
I just had to--
hi, Bill.
435
00:17:36,181 --> 00:17:38,224
Deacon dragged me
down here to find you.
436
00:17:38,266 --> 00:17:39,309
What?
437
00:17:39,351 --> 00:17:41,102
Yeah. He wants me
to tell you
438
00:17:41,144 --> 00:17:44,189
that he really wants
to go back to counseling.
439
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,319
You can tell him
I'm having a great time
440
00:17:49,361 --> 00:17:51,237
and that just
'cause he's jealous
441
00:17:51,279 --> 00:17:52,489
doesn't mean he
can come down here
442
00:17:52,530 --> 00:17:55,283
and try and make
everything okay.
443
00:17:55,325 --> 00:17:58,161
-Go tell him that!
-All right!
444
00:17:58,203 --> 00:17:59,245
Sorry again.
445
00:17:59,287 --> 00:18:00,330
Oh, look out.
446
00:18:00,372 --> 00:18:02,248
XXL.
447
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:09,172
She said just 'cause you're
jealous you can't just run
448
00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:10,590
in there and think that
everything's gonna be okay.
449
00:18:10,632 --> 00:18:13,176
Well,
tell her that...
450
00:18:14,344 --> 00:18:17,639
tell her I'm sorry.
451
00:18:17,681 --> 00:18:19,474
Tell her I miss her.
452
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:23,144
I miss the way
she puts ice in her soup
453
00:18:23,186 --> 00:18:27,607
and moves her lips
slightly when she reads.
454
00:18:27,649 --> 00:18:32,028
I miss the way she puts on
my robe to go get the mail.
455
00:18:32,070 --> 00:18:34,030
Man, I just want
to tell her I love her
456
00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:37,117
every night before
we go to sleep again.
457
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:40,412
That's gonna be way better
comin' from you.
458
00:18:42,247 --> 00:18:44,207
Come on. Just go.
459
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:56,428
Hey, sorry.
Very last time.
460
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,054
Believe me. I know.
I know I would be mad
461
00:18:58,096 --> 00:18:59,931
at me at this point.
462
00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:03,226
Hey, you!
463
00:19:03,268 --> 00:19:05,437
Get outta there!
464
00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,105
Excuse me.
465
00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:08,106
Go away. Go away.
466
00:19:08,148 --> 00:19:09,315
Shoo!
I'm very sorry.
467
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,234
Listen, Deacon
wanted me to tell you--
468
00:19:11,276 --> 00:19:13,069
Doug, leave them alone.
469
00:19:13,111 --> 00:19:14,988
I just have one more thing
to say from Deacon.
470
00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:16,448
You know what,
I should probably just go.
471
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:17,490
Bill, you know what,
Bill, just sit down
472
00:19:17,532 --> 00:19:19,075
and eat your
peanut chews.
473
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:21,536
I can't believe
you brought him down here.
474
00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:23,955
He wanted to come,
he's my friend, I'm sorry.
475
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,999
This is the last thing
that Kelly needs right now.
476
00:19:26,041 --> 00:19:27,584
-You guys--
-Shh!
477
00:19:27,625 --> 00:19:29,544
Let me
just get this out.
478
00:19:29,586 --> 00:19:30,962
He said he misses you
479
00:19:31,004 --> 00:19:32,756
and he loves the way
you eat soup
480
00:19:32,797 --> 00:19:35,592
and the way you wear his robe
when you go to get the mail,
481
00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:38,595
and you--you do something
weird with your lips
482
00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:40,472
when you read...
483
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,682
but in a good way.
484
00:19:42,724 --> 00:19:44,684
Bottom line--
yeah, you know what? Fine.
485
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:47,270
He came down here
because he was jealous,
486
00:19:47,312 --> 00:19:49,105
but it took that
to make him realize
487
00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:51,024
how much he loves you
488
00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:53,777
and how he wants to tell you
that every night
489
00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:55,695
for the rest of his life.
490
00:20:01,159 --> 00:20:02,619
You know what, Bill?
Maybe you should go.
491
00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,120
Yeah.
492
00:20:05,330 --> 00:20:06,748
This was fun.
493
00:20:09,292 --> 00:20:10,585
Excuse me.
Comin' through.
494
00:20:10,627 --> 00:20:12,295
Oh, oh, oh!
Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill.
495
00:20:12,337 --> 00:20:14,297
You know, I'm having
this thing with my computer.
496
00:20:14,339 --> 00:20:16,049
It freezes up every--
you know what?
497
00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:18,093
I'll call ya.
I'll call ya.
498
00:20:25,183 --> 00:20:26,810
Hi.
499
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:28,395
Hi.
500
00:20:28,436 --> 00:20:31,481
Did you really mean
what Doug said?
501
00:20:31,523 --> 00:20:34,317
If he got it right,
then--then, yeah.
502
00:20:39,322 --> 00:20:40,448
You know what?
We're gonna go.
503
00:20:40,490 --> 00:20:41,533
Yeah.
Come on, honey.
504
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,284
Come on.
Let's go.
505
00:20:44,703 --> 00:20:45,745
Sorry. Okay.
506
00:20:45,787 --> 00:20:47,497
-All right.
-Sorry about that.
507
00:20:47,539 --> 00:20:49,582
All right.
508
00:20:49,624 --> 00:20:52,419
So do you want to sit down
and watch the movie?
509
00:20:53,378 --> 00:20:54,671
Okay.
510
00:20:58,174 --> 00:21:01,428
And then after that,
I--I really wanna talk.
511
00:21:02,554 --> 00:21:04,055
Okay.
512
00:21:04,889 --> 00:21:06,391
Okay.
513
00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:11,354
You know...
514
00:21:11,396 --> 00:21:13,398
maybe
we should...
515
00:21:15,567 --> 00:21:17,068
Okay.
516
00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:40,467
Ah, for God's sake,
you took another expired coupon.
517
00:21:40,508 --> 00:21:43,762
Are you stupid, or can you
just not read a calendar?!
518
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:45,597
"Oh, I wonder
what today is?
519
00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:48,641
It's the 48th
of January."
520
00:21:52,187 --> 00:21:53,480
Sorry. Here.
521
00:21:53,521 --> 00:21:55,690
Here's a king-size
Kit Kat bar.
522
00:21:55,732 --> 00:21:57,275
It's for free.
523
00:21:57,317 --> 00:22:00,236
You know where might be
a good place to eat that?
524
00:22:00,278 --> 00:22:02,113
On the unemployment line!
525
00:22:02,155 --> 00:22:03,823
Adios, patchy!
526
00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:11,831
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
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