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♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
2
00:00:04,576 --> 00:00:07,776
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:07,916 --> 00:00:11,686
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
4
00:00:11,690 --> 00:00:14,700
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,696 --> 00:00:18,136
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
6
00:00:18,136 --> 00:00:21,306
♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do ♪
7
00:00:21,409 --> 00:00:23,049
♪ All the things that make us ♪
8
00:00:23,046 --> 00:00:24,316
♪ Laugh and cry ♪
9
00:00:24,415 --> 00:00:30,255
♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
10
00:00:35,304 --> 00:00:36,244
This is the shirt you chose?
11
00:00:36,339 --> 00:00:38,879
Denim, with all the
Warner Brothers characters
12
00:00:38,878 --> 00:00:40,008
peeking out of the pocket?
13
00:00:40,013 --> 00:00:41,823
Yeah, it's the fanciest shirt
I have.
14
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:45,017
But Warner Brothers wouldn't
license their actual characters.
15
00:00:45,123 --> 00:00:47,333
Eh, how are you, Doctor?
16
00:00:47,428 --> 00:00:49,098
Oh, my God,
will you look at this?
17
00:00:49,198 --> 00:00:51,798
Bonnie's latest post has
43 likes.
18
00:00:51,904 --> 00:00:53,774
That's tied for the record.
19
00:00:56,614 --> 00:00:59,254
That's good, but it should say,
"Pretty good view from here."
20
00:00:59,252 --> 00:01:01,962
No, no, no, it's because
she's at the pier.
21
00:01:02,057 --> 00:01:05,127
So... I love that.
22
00:01:05,130 --> 00:01:07,100
Damn it, Peter,
23
00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:09,041
now she's got
the Spooner Street record.
24
00:01:09,038 --> 00:01:11,038
Hang on, I'm texting
Quagmire and Cleveland.
25
00:01:11,042 --> 00:01:12,382
They gotta see this.
26
00:01:18,658 --> 00:01:20,928
Hey, kids, I'm Mr. Andy,
and I just invented
27
00:01:21,029 --> 00:01:23,229
this really crazy game.
28
00:01:23,233 --> 00:01:25,743
One person hides
in a top secret spot,
29
00:01:25,838 --> 00:01:29,048
and the others count to ten,
then try and find him.
30
00:01:29,145 --> 00:01:31,875
We'll call it, oh, I don't know,
"hide-and-seek"?
31
00:01:31,884 --> 00:01:34,994
I say, one game covering
covert activity,
32
00:01:34,990 --> 00:01:36,860
surveillance and counting?
33
00:01:36,860 --> 00:01:40,270
I would follow this man into
the very bowels of hell.
34
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,097
All right, who wants
to hide first?
35
00:01:42,104 --> 00:01:43,944
Oh, me, me.
36
00:01:43,941 --> 00:01:46,151
Looks like we have
our first little hider.
37
00:01:46,145 --> 00:01:49,515
I'm so glad they didn't fire you
for giving us baths.
38
00:01:49,620 --> 00:01:53,530
Okay, it's time to bid on our
final donated item of the night:
39
00:01:53,527 --> 00:01:56,227
a romantic Vermont
weekend getaway.
40
00:01:56,332 --> 00:01:57,942
Peter, we have to win.
41
00:01:57,936 --> 00:02:00,736
Vermont is an Instagram goldmine.
42
00:02:00,742 --> 00:02:02,282
I could shatter Bonnie's record.
43
00:02:02,277 --> 00:02:03,277
Lois, we can't afford...
44
00:02:03,380 --> 00:02:04,850
I'll take you to Ben & Jerry's.
45
00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:06,990
I have $600 taped
to my stomach.
46
00:02:07,087 --> 00:02:08,287
$600!
47
00:02:08,289 --> 00:02:10,059
Sold.
There were no other bids.
48
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:12,670
You could have had it for $40.
49
00:02:14,503 --> 00:02:17,013
That concludes this scene,
ladies and gentlemen.
50
00:02:23,219 --> 00:02:25,359
Chris, what-- Oh, who cares?
51
00:02:25,357 --> 00:02:27,027
We're in Vermont till Sunday.
52
00:02:27,127 --> 00:02:30,027
Call if you have to
but, like, let's not call.
53
00:02:30,033 --> 00:02:32,143
Can we only brush our teeth
for 60 seconds
54
00:02:32,237 --> 00:02:33,907
instead of the full 90?
55
00:02:33,908 --> 00:02:36,008
You brush your teeth? Nerd.
56
00:02:36,112 --> 00:02:37,782
And remember, kids,
if you get nervous,
57
00:02:37,782 --> 00:02:40,422
you can always turn on
the home security system.
58
00:02:40,420 --> 00:02:43,990
That's right.
The keypad code is 6969.
59
00:02:43,994 --> 00:02:45,304
If your mother doesn't want
to do it,
60
00:02:45,297 --> 00:02:46,667
at least she can type it.
61
00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:48,667
You're a legend, Dad.
62
00:02:52,344 --> 00:02:54,354
Hey, Brian, can you find me?
63
00:02:54,448 --> 00:02:57,148
What the--
Is that a talking blanket?
64
00:02:57,154 --> 00:02:59,234
It's me.
It's crazy, right?
65
00:02:59,325 --> 00:03:01,595
It's this brand-new game
called hide-and-seek.
66
00:03:01,730 --> 00:03:04,640
Basically a peekaboo
on Flintstones Vitamins.
67
00:03:04,636 --> 00:03:05,936
- Let's play
- Fine.
68
00:03:06,039 --> 00:03:07,579
But like all adults,
on my turns,
69
00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:10,309
I'll only hide in beds
so I can take little naps.
70
00:03:10,313 --> 00:03:12,123
I'll start counting.
Go upstairs.
71
00:03:12,117 --> 00:03:15,187
Whoa, I never even thought about
hiding upstairs.
72
00:03:15,290 --> 00:03:17,630
This is a game changer,
like Twitch.
73
00:03:17,629 --> 00:03:21,399
Normal voice.
Playing Minecraft, quiet-normal.
74
00:03:21,503 --> 00:03:23,343
Loudest scream possible!
75
00:03:23,339 --> 00:03:26,349
Kinda quiet, normal-quiet,
Minecraft.
76
00:03:26,446 --> 00:03:28,646
Scorching-hot audio levels!
77
00:03:39,171 --> 00:03:40,111
Oh, my God.
78
00:03:40,207 --> 00:03:43,577
Pretty cool spot, eh, Bri?
79
00:03:43,581 --> 00:03:45,821
Do all kids know
what a good spot
80
00:03:45,952 --> 00:03:47,492
a closed-door refrigerator is?
81
00:03:47,589 --> 00:03:50,129
No. Don't ever hide in there.
Could you even breathe?
82
00:03:50,127 --> 00:03:52,727
No. It's a good thing
you were looking for me.
83
00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:55,336
Stewie, no. Very bad.
84
00:03:55,337 --> 00:03:56,767
What the hell was that?
85
00:03:56,774 --> 00:03:59,184
A spanking.
That was me spanking you.
86
00:03:59,178 --> 00:04:02,318
That's it? Brian,
you either gotta be that guy
87
00:04:02,418 --> 00:04:03,518
or-or not be that guy.
88
00:04:03,621 --> 00:04:06,731
I-I don't--
I don't know what that was.
89
00:04:18,483 --> 00:04:20,863
Oh, God, she did it again.
90
00:04:20,855 --> 00:04:21,915
- Who?
- Bonnie.
91
00:04:21,924 --> 00:04:25,064
Every time I do a post,
she does one right after.
92
00:04:25,163 --> 00:04:26,633
- So what?
- So what?
93
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:29,243
It undercuts my post's
popularity.
94
00:04:29,338 --> 00:04:31,878
Like Armageddon and Deep Impact.
95
00:04:31,877 --> 00:04:33,907
Oh, yeah, that was weird.
96
00:04:33,914 --> 00:04:36,554
Can you imagine you just
wrapped principle shooting
97
00:04:36,553 --> 00:04:38,563
on Volcano, and you're
very proud of it,
98
00:04:38,657 --> 00:04:41,057
and then bam,
here comes Dante's Peak?
99
00:04:41,062 --> 00:04:42,032
One more and I'll get it.
100
00:04:42,164 --> 00:04:44,704
You've just finished
a comprehensive retelling
101
00:04:44,703 --> 00:04:47,273
of early '70s middle-distance
running in Oregon
102
00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:48,584
with Prefontaine,
103
00:04:48,677 --> 00:04:50,307
and then boom,
your Leto gets Crudup'ed
104
00:04:50,413 --> 00:04:53,323
by Without Limits.
105
00:04:53,419 --> 00:04:55,319
Sorry, I was tracking
two ladies holding hands,
106
00:04:55,323 --> 00:04:57,533
and they just kissed goodbye,
so I've been elsewhere.
107
00:04:57,529 --> 00:05:01,339
Wha-What were you saying?
Y-You like movies or something?
108
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:02,505
Ah, look at this.
109
00:05:02,505 --> 00:05:04,575
A glassblowing class.
110
00:05:04,676 --> 00:05:07,716
That kind of crap is perfect
for Instagram.
111
00:05:17,367 --> 00:05:19,067
Oh, I'm so beat.
112
00:05:19,071 --> 00:05:20,711
Me and Rupert played H&S--
113
00:05:20,708 --> 00:05:22,108
quicker way to say
hide-and-seek--
114
00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:24,620
all night,
until like 8:00 p. m.
115
00:05:24,716 --> 00:05:26,316
I'm not even joking.
Wanna play?
116
00:05:26,419 --> 00:05:28,589
Not now. I'm trying to get
this TED Talk onto the TV.
117
00:05:28,591 --> 00:05:31,461
I can see the PornHub logo
reflecting on your
118
00:05:31,462 --> 00:05:34,072
big, wet dog eyes,
you scumbag.
119
00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:36,708
Honestly, Stewie, I'm getting
pretty bored of hide-and-seek.
120
00:05:36,707 --> 00:05:39,207
Oh, please, Brian,
just one game. Please?
121
00:05:39,311 --> 00:05:40,651
Okay.
122
00:05:40,648 --> 00:05:42,348
But no more hiding
in the fridge,
123
00:05:42,351 --> 00:05:44,461
in the washing machine,
the open safe
124
00:05:44,455 --> 00:05:46,325
with the long-forgotten
combination.
125
00:05:46,325 --> 00:05:47,695
Oh, no, I'm way better now.
126
00:05:47,795 --> 00:05:49,465
I might be the best player
in the world.
127
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:52,536
Okay, I'm gonna go hide.
Count to 20.
128
00:05:58,784 --> 00:06:01,864
I'll probably count to, like,
six or seven minutes.
129
00:06:11,008 --> 00:06:13,878
Oh, baby, that's the spot.
130
00:06:25,605 --> 00:06:27,135
Oh, Amelie, Noelle,
131
00:06:27,241 --> 00:06:28,981
I have a 48-hour layover
in Paris,
132
00:06:29,078 --> 00:06:31,348
and I'd love to include you
in my horny plans.
133
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:32,319
Oui, oui.
134
00:06:32,317 --> 00:06:35,157
Yeah, on me.
That's what I was hoping for.
135
00:06:35,156 --> 00:06:37,486
Oh, this is gonna be
a great weekend.
136
00:06:37,494 --> 00:06:38,904
That seems like
it's happening, right?
137
00:06:38,998 --> 00:06:40,528
Your orgy? Yeah.
138
00:06:40,635 --> 00:06:42,535
Can we just talk about
plane stuff?
139
00:06:42,538 --> 00:06:43,768
Ah, I forget you young guys
140
00:06:43,774 --> 00:06:45,684
don't like to talk about sex
at work.
141
00:06:45,778 --> 00:06:47,978
Hey, take over for a sec.
I gotta make sure I packed
142
00:06:47,982 --> 00:06:50,762
my pilot sunglasses that
diminish our entire profession
143
00:06:50,755 --> 00:06:53,385
to a frat guy's
Halloween costume.
144
00:06:56,934 --> 00:06:59,104
- Stewie?
- Mr. Quagmire?
145
00:06:59,104 --> 00:07:00,884
Terrance.
146
00:07:08,624 --> 00:07:10,094
All right, we're gonna
get you home, little guy.
147
00:07:11,830 --> 00:07:14,170
Peter, is Lois there?
Put me on speaker.
148
00:07:14,168 --> 00:07:16,238
Hi, Glenn.
What's going on?
149
00:07:16,238 --> 00:07:17,468
Well, I just flew to Paris,
150
00:07:17,474 --> 00:07:19,654
and Stewie was somehow
in my suitcase.
151
00:07:19,646 --> 00:07:21,046
He must have snuck in there.
152
00:07:21,148 --> 00:07:22,948
Oh, my God!
Is he okay?
153
00:07:23,052 --> 00:07:25,732
Yeah, he's eating one of those
weird French street ham things
154
00:07:25,725 --> 00:07:27,725
that aren't good
but are also amazing.
155
00:07:27,729 --> 00:07:29,159
Look, how soon can you
come get him?
156
00:07:29,164 --> 00:07:30,774
I only have 48 hours in Paris
157
00:07:30,768 --> 00:07:32,838
and a whole list of
horny activities to do.
158
00:07:32,939 --> 00:07:35,709
Okay, let me just
do the math.
159
00:07:35,711 --> 00:07:38,721
In 48 hours we'd need to
get to an airport,
160
00:07:38,817 --> 00:07:41,487
which we're hours from,
find a last-minute flight--
161
00:07:41,489 --> 00:07:42,629
if there are any--
162
00:07:42,725 --> 00:07:45,595
fly ten hours,
then wait for Peter's
163
00:07:45,598 --> 00:07:47,328
post-flight airport poop...
164
00:07:47,334 --> 00:07:48,674
Peter don't poop on planes.
165
00:07:48,671 --> 00:07:52,141
Or we leave him in the care
of a trusted adult
166
00:07:52,144 --> 00:07:54,724
and one of our best friends
and enjoy the first trip
167
00:07:54,849 --> 00:07:56,889
we've had together in years.
168
00:07:57,555 --> 00:07:59,455
Lois, uh, shouldn't we go?
169
00:07:59,559 --> 00:08:01,799
Okay, if you think that...
170
00:08:01,897 --> 00:08:04,227
Ah! I got another like.
171
00:08:04,335 --> 00:08:06,435
Peter, listen, Stewie is safe,
172
00:08:06,439 --> 00:08:08,639
we're in the prettiest place
we'll ever be
173
00:08:08,644 --> 00:08:10,654
and I'm on an Instagram
hot streak.
174
00:08:10,648 --> 00:08:12,618
I can beat Bonnie's record.
175
00:08:12,618 --> 00:08:13,948
Still, as parents,
I think that...
176
00:08:13,954 --> 00:08:16,534
Oh, look, my mom's friend that
kind of looks like
177
00:08:16,526 --> 00:08:19,396
the AT&T lady just commented
on my last post.
178
00:08:19,398 --> 00:08:23,508
She says, "Your husband is
very handsome."
179
00:08:23,507 --> 00:08:25,307
Quags, you got this, right?
180
00:08:25,310 --> 00:08:29,620
- Captain Quagmire, the Quags...
- Stop! I can't believe this.
181
00:08:29,719 --> 00:08:31,389
Okay, I'll watch him.
182
00:08:31,389 --> 00:08:32,629
But I'm not happy, Peter.
183
00:08:32,625 --> 00:08:34,225
Oh, and now that you're
my babysitter,
184
00:08:34,228 --> 00:08:35,928
I'd rather you call me
Mr. Griffin.
185
00:08:38,069 --> 00:08:40,609
Peter, did you just text me
the peach emoji
186
00:08:40,708 --> 00:08:42,378
followed by
the water squirt emoji?
187
00:08:42,377 --> 00:08:44,677
Yeah. You're the babysitter now.
188
00:08:44,682 --> 00:08:47,152
And it's "Mr. Griffin."
189
00:08:51,362 --> 00:08:53,172
This is the Paris
Attractions Channel,
190
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:56,236
with a host who's
never been to Paris.
191
00:08:56,238 --> 00:08:57,778
Oh, wow, what is that thing?
192
00:08:57,875 --> 00:09:00,875
The Eiffel Tower is one of
Paris' top attractions.
193
00:09:00,881 --> 00:09:02,651
It's like a hundred feet, huh?
194
00:09:02,752 --> 00:09:05,462
Yeah, yeah. I wonder
if you could get up there.
195
00:09:05,457 --> 00:09:08,727
If you do plan on visiting,
you want to get here early.
196
00:09:08,731 --> 00:09:11,441
Is that right? Yeah, yeah,
that could be cool.
197
00:09:11,435 --> 00:09:13,365
Hey, is that, like,
the king's house?
198
00:09:13,372 --> 00:09:14,982
Oh! Can we go there? Please?
199
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:16,676
I don't know
what you're yammering about,
200
00:09:16,680 --> 00:09:19,420
but the only place you're going
is this hotel and the airport.
201
00:09:19,418 --> 00:09:21,058
Kind of thought
you'd be asleep by now.
202
00:09:21,055 --> 00:09:24,085
I'm smart but not
"put myself to sleep" smart.
203
00:09:24,094 --> 00:09:27,204
I'm just gonna put on some music
for a bit to calm down.
204
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,670
- What do you like?
- Goo-goo.
205
00:09:28,670 --> 00:09:30,240
- The Dolls?
- Gaga.
206
00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:31,410
The Lady?
Aha.
207
00:09:31,409 --> 00:09:32,709
Now you're talking my language.
208
00:09:35,818 --> 00:09:38,588
Hey. Hey, you got moves, man.
209
00:09:38,590 --> 00:09:40,690
Yeah, I mean, Ms. Christie
put me two from the middle
210
00:09:40,694 --> 00:09:42,064
at dance class winter demo.
211
00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:43,304
I know what I'm doing.
212
00:09:43,399 --> 00:09:45,069
Hey, you want to jump
on the bed?
213
00:09:45,170 --> 00:09:46,210
See how high you can get?
214
00:09:46,338 --> 00:09:47,468
- Go ahead.
- Is...
215
00:09:47,575 --> 00:09:49,305
A-Are we allowed?
216
00:09:49,311 --> 00:09:51,051
Is this really happening?
217
00:09:52,250 --> 00:09:53,220
Hey, that looks fun.
218
00:09:59,732 --> 00:10:01,172
Me and this baby who is not mine
219
00:10:01,168 --> 00:10:03,238
are in the room below
trying to sleep.
220
00:10:03,239 --> 00:10:04,139
This is hotel,
221
00:10:04,241 --> 00:10:07,551
not jungle gym
children's play structure.
222
00:10:07,648 --> 00:10:09,818
- Very sorry.
- It won't happen again.
223
00:10:13,392 --> 00:10:15,762
- What a loser.
- What a dork baby.
224
00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:17,965
You know, I think
they were weirdly on our plane.
225
00:10:17,969 --> 00:10:21,179
I weirdly think those guys
were on our airport shuttle.
226
00:10:24,883 --> 00:10:27,453
You know, I envy you, Stewie.
227
00:10:27,454 --> 00:10:29,094
I used to be innocent like you.
228
00:10:29,091 --> 00:10:29,961
I've killed people.
229
00:10:30,059 --> 00:10:31,759
Then I lost my virginity at six
230
00:10:31,763 --> 00:10:33,603
to our strangely female plumber.
231
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,840
- Respect.
- I know you're just a baby, but...
232
00:10:35,938 --> 00:10:37,578
I feel like
you really understand me.
233
00:10:37,575 --> 00:10:40,105
I can understand you, dude.
234
00:10:41,048 --> 00:10:43,618
Aw, it's late.
You must be tired.
235
00:10:47,260 --> 00:10:48,600
There you go, little buddy.
236
00:10:51,903 --> 00:10:55,383
We now return
to Toi, Moi et Dupree.
237
00:10:55,376 --> 00:10:57,206
Le wow.
238
00:11:03,025 --> 00:11:06,425
They say Mona Lisa's eyes
follow you wherever you go.
239
00:11:11,610 --> 00:11:13,510
Yeesh. Quagmire was right.
240
00:11:13,514 --> 00:11:14,954
Somebody's in here!
241
00:11:19,926 --> 00:11:23,026
Oh, her expression is gas!
242
00:11:32,552 --> 00:11:33,692
Oh, this is it.
243
00:11:33,687 --> 00:11:36,387
A good caption
and Bonnie's reign is over.
244
00:11:36,492 --> 00:11:38,762
Hey, how 'bout we stand
on either side of the tree
245
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,004
and the caption is
"Tree Amigos"?
246
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:45,781
Or I'm holding a leaf and
it says "Leafing is so hard"?
247
00:11:45,778 --> 00:11:47,078
Yeah, uh, you know, I feel like
248
00:11:47,180 --> 00:11:48,950
someone said "Tree Amigos"
earlier
249
00:11:49,051 --> 00:11:50,591
and-and we were--
we were all laughing.
250
00:11:50,588 --> 00:11:52,318
Okay, step back.
251
00:11:52,324 --> 00:11:53,594
Another step.
252
00:11:56,332 --> 00:11:57,742
Big step back.
253
00:11:58,637 --> 00:11:59,837
Peter, are you sure?
254
00:11:59,939 --> 00:12:01,609
I'm a little close to the edge.
255
00:12:01,710 --> 00:12:04,850
No, you're fine.
One more big, big step back.
256
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:07,319
You know what,
tiny step forward.
257
00:12:08,289 --> 00:12:10,129
W...
258
00:12:11,095 --> 00:12:13,725
Whoa, that's not
usually how cliffs work.
259
00:12:16,305 --> 00:12:18,935
You know, Stewie, this wasn't
the weekend I had planned,
260
00:12:18,944 --> 00:12:20,714
but I'm having a lot of fun
with you.
261
00:12:20,714 --> 00:12:22,124
Me, too. It's so fun,
262
00:12:22,217 --> 00:12:24,857
I don't even mind
the too-loud French radio.
263
00:12:24,856 --> 00:12:26,556
Bonsoir, Paris. You're listening
264
00:12:26,559 --> 00:12:28,499
to Double Vé-Cé-O-Qu, Le Coq.
265
00:12:28,496 --> 00:12:30,296
Rude 102! Shut up!
266
00:12:30,300 --> 00:12:32,710
We've got deux tickets
for Un Direction,
267
00:12:32,705 --> 00:12:34,635
so give us a call
at cinq-cinq-cinq,
268
00:12:34,642 --> 00:12:36,182
cinq-cinq-cinq-cinq.
269
00:12:36,178 --> 00:12:39,018
And I hope the ladies have
an umbrella for this next one
270
00:12:39,017 --> 00:12:41,317
or they'll be "Alouette."
271
00:12:41,322 --> 00:12:44,392
♪ Alouette, gentille alouette. ♪
272
00:12:49,806 --> 00:12:51,576
I love you, man.
273
00:12:51,576 --> 00:12:53,306
I love you, too, man.
274
00:12:53,412 --> 00:12:57,492
And, hey, you know, I-I know
my dad and everyone says
275
00:12:57,487 --> 00:12:59,827
that your car l-looks--
276
00:12:59,926 --> 00:13:01,556
is like a woman's car,
277
00:13:01,663 --> 00:13:03,173
but I-I like it.
278
00:13:03,165 --> 00:13:05,335
And, hey, off-topic,
but you-you don't think
279
00:13:05,336 --> 00:13:08,776
my car is-is like
a-a woman's car, right?
280
00:13:08,777 --> 00:13:10,547
Yeah, no. No, no way, man.
281
00:13:10,547 --> 00:13:11,477
Okay, good, good, good.
282
00:13:11,482 --> 00:13:13,492
Yeah, 'cause Peter's
always saying stuff.
283
00:13:13,486 --> 00:13:15,156
I-I mean, I love your dad,
284
00:13:15,156 --> 00:13:18,256
but he's-he's just--
he's not very sensitive.
285
00:13:35,964 --> 00:13:37,974
Oh, my God, it's Madeline!
286
00:13:37,968 --> 00:13:39,838
She must have snuck out
of the nunnery.
287
00:13:39,839 --> 00:13:41,839
She's kind of a bad girl.
288
00:13:44,916 --> 00:13:46,846
I got to shoot my shot with her.
289
00:13:54,969 --> 00:13:56,409
We are approaching
290
00:13:56,405 --> 00:13:57,775
the end of the line.
291
00:13:57,775 --> 00:14:00,575
Please grab all bags and babies.
292
00:14:00,581 --> 00:14:01,821
Stewie, we got to get off.
293
00:14:01,816 --> 00:14:03,546
Hey, Stewie,
stop messing around.
294
00:14:03,553 --> 00:14:05,523
This is our stop.
295
00:14:05,524 --> 00:14:06,834
Stewie!
296
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:09,460
Stewie! Where are you?!
297
00:14:09,565 --> 00:14:10,695
Oh, please, you got to help me.
298
00:14:10,701 --> 00:14:11,871
I'm looking for a little boy
299
00:14:11,870 --> 00:14:13,240
with red overalls
and a yellow shirt.
300
00:14:13,339 --> 00:14:15,439
You are looking to buy
or to rent?
301
00:14:15,443 --> 00:14:17,113
What? No! God!
302
00:14:17,213 --> 00:14:19,383
How is Paris considered
a classy city?
303
00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:22,164
The buildings are beautiful.
The people are trash.
304
00:14:27,735 --> 00:14:30,165
Stewie! Stewie!
305
00:14:31,175 --> 00:14:32,605
Stewie!
306
00:14:32,611 --> 00:14:34,281
Sir, have you seen a baby
307
00:14:34,281 --> 00:14:35,981
with a football-shaped head
around here?
308
00:14:35,984 --> 00:14:38,694
Yes, all babies have
a round, football-shaped head.
309
00:14:38,690 --> 00:14:40,130
No, I mean the real football!
310
00:14:40,126 --> 00:14:42,326
The one where you can't remember
how to put on pants
311
00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:43,500
when you're 38.
312
00:14:43,499 --> 00:14:44,369
Taxi!
313
00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:47,067
Taxi rapid transfer
garbage strike.
314
00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:50,513
It began a moment ago and
will end the moment you leave.
315
00:14:55,356 --> 00:14:56,256
Stewie?
316
00:14:56,358 --> 00:14:57,798
Are you here?
317
00:15:02,638 --> 00:15:04,038
I'm screwed.
318
00:15:04,141 --> 00:15:05,911
I'm totally screwed.
319
00:15:06,946 --> 00:15:08,476
Wait a minute.
I can't call Peter.
320
00:15:08,617 --> 00:15:09,647
He'll kill me!
321
00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:19,398
Ha-ha. Got him.
322
00:15:19,505 --> 00:15:21,005
Glenn Quagmire.
323
00:15:21,108 --> 00:15:23,478
What... is... up?
324
00:15:23,479 --> 00:15:24,749
I lost Stewie in Paris.
325
00:15:24,749 --> 00:15:26,549
We got separated
and I can't find him.
326
00:15:26,553 --> 00:15:27,893
I'm too ashamed to tell Peter.
327
00:15:27,988 --> 00:15:28,988
What? Did you call the police?
328
00:15:29,090 --> 00:15:31,960
On strike. Brian, you're
the last guy I want to call,
329
00:15:32,063 --> 00:15:33,533
but you know Stewie better
than anyone.
330
00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:34,673
Can you help me find him?
331
00:15:34,769 --> 00:15:36,169
I'll fly you to Paris.
332
00:15:36,171 --> 00:15:39,081
First class and no male
flight attendants in my area.
333
00:15:39,077 --> 00:15:41,177
- Fine.
- I knew airlines could do that!
334
00:15:41,181 --> 00:15:43,391
Also, I want a special
Kibbles 'n Bits meal.
335
00:15:43,486 --> 00:15:44,956
- Fine...
- Only, Quagmire,
336
00:15:44,956 --> 00:15:46,286
I want just the bits.
337
00:15:46,291 --> 00:15:48,301
Come on! Who's gonna pick
the kibbles out?
338
00:15:48,395 --> 00:15:51,395
I kind of don't want to have
to think about that, Glenn.
339
00:15:52,638 --> 00:15:55,208
Lois, you had a big fall,
but you're gonna be fine.
340
00:15:55,309 --> 00:15:56,349
We're getting you
to the hospital.
341
00:15:56,345 --> 00:15:58,715
Oh, Peter,
I'm so glad you're here.
342
00:15:58,717 --> 00:16:00,117
Me, too. Hey, you know,
343
00:16:00,253 --> 00:16:02,733
you were saying some
crazy things when you were out.
344
00:16:02,825 --> 00:16:04,925
- I was?
- Yeah, I mean,
345
00:16:04,929 --> 00:16:06,529
you said you lost 1,100 bucks
on BetKings.
346
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,543
I checked the account.
You definitely lost it.
347
00:16:08,637 --> 00:16:11,137
But in light of what happened,
I'm not mad at you.
348
00:16:11,241 --> 00:16:13,711
I mean, UConn had
literally never lost to Rutgers
349
00:16:13,814 --> 00:16:15,254
in lacrosse.
I mean, it was free money.
350
00:16:15,249 --> 00:16:18,119
You're betting on lacrosse now?
351
00:16:18,122 --> 00:16:18,962
You're not wrong!
352
00:16:19,090 --> 00:16:21,500
There's no way UConn loses twice
in a row!
353
00:16:21,629 --> 00:16:24,739
Plus, Syracuse's all-American
attacker, Tristan Wyndcroft,
354
00:16:24,836 --> 00:16:25,736
broke his leg!
355
00:16:25,838 --> 00:16:27,838
It'll be all Huskies all day!
356
00:16:27,842 --> 00:16:29,612
Peter, no!
357
00:16:29,712 --> 00:16:30,612
Just rest, babe!
358
00:16:30,714 --> 00:16:32,724
I promise I'm not mad at you!
359
00:16:36,860 --> 00:16:38,630
Where else could Stewie be?
360
00:16:38,730 --> 00:16:40,830
Should we look in, like, a park?
361
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,304
"In, like, a park"?
362
00:16:42,403 --> 00:16:44,613
I flew you out here
for this level of insight?
363
00:16:44,609 --> 00:16:46,979
- I thought you knew him!
- I do know him, okay?
364
00:16:47,113 --> 00:16:48,953
And I would have taken
a lot better care of him.
365
00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:51,020
You lost him, Glenn!
How do you do that?
366
00:16:51,121 --> 00:16:53,861
What, did you go to a-a sex...
place or something
367
00:16:53,994 --> 00:16:55,264
and leave him tied up outside?
368
00:16:55,263 --> 00:16:57,403
No! We went out to dinner
and drank some wine,
369
00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:00,410
just like every responsible
adult and child in France.
370
00:17:00,406 --> 00:17:01,636
But you're right.
371
00:17:01,743 --> 00:17:02,913
I lost him.
372
00:17:02,912 --> 00:17:05,882
And now he's gone
and it's all my fault.
373
00:17:05,884 --> 00:17:07,764
I'm a loser.
374
00:17:07,755 --> 00:17:09,685
I'd do anything to get him back.
375
00:17:09,792 --> 00:17:10,992
I really miss him.
376
00:17:10,994 --> 00:17:12,534
- You do?
- Yeah.
377
00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:13,825
We really bonded.
378
00:17:13,934 --> 00:17:15,044
It was nice.
379
00:17:15,036 --> 00:17:16,906
He's a special little guy, huh?
380
00:17:17,006 --> 00:17:18,806
Yeah. He sure is.
381
00:17:18,810 --> 00:17:19,980
We just got to find him.
382
00:17:19,979 --> 00:17:21,849
And in a town called
"gay Paree,"
383
00:17:21,849 --> 00:17:23,749
he could literally be anywhere.
384
00:17:29,665 --> 00:17:30,825
Where am I?
385
00:17:30,834 --> 00:17:33,244
What am I going to do?
386
00:17:36,245 --> 00:17:39,145
My guidebook said
Marcel Proust is buried there.
387
00:17:39,150 --> 00:17:40,520
He'll know what to do.
388
00:18:05,436 --> 00:18:07,936
Ugh. Can't even get through
his tomb quote.
389
00:18:09,477 --> 00:18:12,787
I wish Brian were here
to pretend he gets it.
390
00:18:21,736 --> 00:18:24,506
The Père Lachaise Cemetery.
391
00:18:25,309 --> 00:18:27,309
We were supposed to go
before we got separated!
392
00:18:27,313 --> 00:18:29,653
Yeah, and while we're here,
I wouldn't mind taking a leak
393
00:18:29,752 --> 00:18:31,192
on Gérard Depardieu's grave.
394
00:18:31,188 --> 00:18:32,518
He's still alive.
395
00:18:32,524 --> 00:18:33,694
Really?
396
00:18:33,693 --> 00:18:34,833
How?
397
00:18:34,829 --> 00:18:36,869
Stewie!
398
00:18:36,966 --> 00:18:39,706
- Stewie!
- Hey, look!
399
00:18:39,705 --> 00:18:41,065
Stewie!
400
00:18:41,074 --> 00:18:44,084
Brian? What...
what are you doing here?
401
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,150
Quagmire called me...
402
00:18:47,921 --> 00:18:49,121
And, um...
403
00:18:49,257 --> 00:18:51,497
and he told me you guys
were playing hide-and-seek
404
00:18:51,495 --> 00:18:53,965
but that you were
too good a player for him.
405
00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:55,867
He... he did?
406
00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:57,614
He did.
He said he needed my help,
407
00:18:57,608 --> 00:18:59,608
because I'm a dog
and I can smell you.
408
00:18:59,612 --> 00:19:02,122
You're too good
to be found any other way.
409
00:19:02,116 --> 00:19:04,146
You know, this is
probably the best hiding place
410
00:19:04,154 --> 00:19:05,194
I've ever seen.
411
00:19:05,189 --> 00:19:06,459
But it's not...
412
00:19:06,458 --> 00:19:08,028
It-it wasn't...
413
00:19:08,028 --> 00:19:09,458
You really think so?
414
00:19:09,464 --> 00:19:10,304
I know so.
415
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:11,769
Nobody would ever look here.
416
00:19:11,769 --> 00:19:12,809
It's too scary.
417
00:19:12,905 --> 00:19:15,135
It is pretty scary.
418
00:19:15,142 --> 00:19:17,782
Am I the best hide-and-seek
player in the world?
419
00:19:17,781 --> 00:19:18,921
Uh, yeah.
420
00:19:18,917 --> 00:19:22,017
There's the best little
travel buddy in the world!
421
00:19:22,825 --> 00:19:25,725
Whoa! I guess I'm really good
at lots of stuff!
422
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:29,141
I'd say we should get a room,
but we already have one.
423
00:19:31,709 --> 00:19:32,809
Yep.
424
00:19:32,811 --> 00:19:34,011
Totally.
425
00:19:34,114 --> 00:19:37,254
I missed you,
you unrelenting douchebag.
426
00:19:37,253 --> 00:19:40,833
♪ It seems today ♪
427
00:19:40,827 --> 00:19:43,127
♪ That all you see ♪
428
00:19:43,132 --> 00:19:45,772
♪ Is the violence in movies ♪
429
00:19:45,904 --> 00:19:48,884
♪ And hon-hon-hon on TV ♪
430
00:19:48,877 --> 00:19:53,117
♪ Lucky there's a family "gi." ♪
431
00:20:03,238 --> 00:20:05,208
I'm sorry
you broke your leg, Lois.
432
00:20:05,342 --> 00:20:07,722
Oh, no, Peter,
I'm the one who's sorry.
433
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:11,555
I got so wrapped up trying to
beat Bonnie at stupid Instagram
434
00:20:11,556 --> 00:20:14,186
that I ruined our whole weekend.
435
00:20:14,762 --> 00:20:15,732
I don't believe it.
436
00:20:15,864 --> 00:20:18,774
Tristan Wyndcroft is checking in
for Syracuse.
437
00:20:18,770 --> 00:20:20,510
With a broken leg?!
438
00:20:21,308 --> 00:20:23,348
I know. What was I thinking?
439
00:20:23,345 --> 00:20:25,815
And the irony is
she still has the record.
440
00:20:25,917 --> 00:20:28,757
I guess we should probably take
an Instagram break
441
00:20:28,757 --> 00:20:29,757
for a bit, huh?
442
00:20:29,859 --> 00:20:31,359
Probably.
443
00:20:31,361 --> 00:20:34,371
Can I check something
on our bank account real quick?
444
00:20:35,136 --> 00:20:36,836
Uh, Lois?
445
00:20:36,839 --> 00:20:38,479
You may want to see this.
446
00:20:41,649 --> 00:20:43,019
Ah! Break's over!
447
00:20:43,018 --> 00:20:44,518
Eat that, Bonnie!
448
00:20:44,622 --> 00:20:47,092
Oh, Peter, now that I have
more likes than Bonnie,
449
00:20:47,193 --> 00:20:50,673
I realize that this was
the best weekend ever.
450
00:20:51,435 --> 00:20:53,265
Wyndcroft scores
with no time left!
451
00:20:53,372 --> 00:20:54,612
Syracuse wins!
452
00:20:54,608 --> 00:20:56,648
Man, Lois,
453
00:20:56,746 --> 00:21:00,946
you were saying some crazy stuff
about BetKings during surgery.
31408
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