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1
00:00:12,987 --> 00:00:15,425
This is gonna be cool.
2
00:00:15,512 --> 00:00:18,993
We're gonna egg a house.
3
00:00:19,080 --> 00:00:20,603
Yeah, it's gonna be cool.
4
00:00:20,690 --> 00:00:22,213
Yeah.
5
00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:24,913
But, um, like,
which house should we egg?
6
00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:29,352
Uh, not this one.
7
00:00:29,439 --> 00:00:32,659
Whoever lives here is cool.
8
00:00:34,835 --> 00:00:38,100
Yeah, not this one either.
These guys kick ass.
9
00:00:38,186 --> 00:00:39,536
They sure do, Beavis.
10
00:00:43,060 --> 00:00:46,368
Whoa, now,
whoever lives here sucks.
11
00:00:46,456 --> 00:00:49,328
Beavis, I think
we have a winner.
12
00:00:49,414 --> 00:00:52,201
Yeah, yeah, let's egg it, yeah.
13
00:00:52,287 --> 00:00:54,725
Okay, Beavis,
when I count to three,
14
00:00:54,811 --> 00:00:57,206
let's throw these eggs.
15
00:00:57,292 --> 00:00:59,512
Uh, go.
16
00:01:02,732 --> 00:01:04,865
Yeah.
17
00:01:08,304 --> 00:01:09,435
Damn it.
18
00:01:11,786 --> 00:01:13,352
Ugh, damn it!
19
00:01:15,572 --> 00:01:16,965
Ah!
20
00:01:17,051 --> 00:01:18,269
Beavis, you dumbass.
21
00:01:18,356 --> 00:01:20,141
You got in the way
of my perfect throw.
22
00:01:23,275 --> 00:01:24,841
I'll show you
how it's done, Beavis.
23
00:01:24,929 --> 00:01:27,278
Check this out.
24
00:01:29,325 --> 00:01:31,152
Ah!
25
00:01:31,239 --> 00:01:33,503
Damn it. Throwing sucks.
26
00:01:39,987 --> 00:01:42,686
♪ I'm in my prime, optimist ♪
27
00:01:42,772 --> 00:01:44,340
Uh, I think
28
00:01:44,426 --> 00:01:45,993
she's supposed to be,
like, Pinocchio,
29
00:01:46,081 --> 00:01:48,647
but when she lies,
her butt grows bigger.
30
00:01:50,215 --> 00:01:51,868
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
31
00:01:51,956 --> 00:01:54,436
She been doing a whole lot
of lying.
32
00:01:54,524 --> 00:01:57,004
You know what I'm saying?
33
00:01:58,658 --> 00:02:00,094
I wish, when I lied,
34
00:02:00,182 --> 00:02:02,115
my schlong would grow bigger
'cause then I'd be like,
35
00:02:02,140 --> 00:02:04,272
"Hey, baby."
36
00:02:04,359 --> 00:02:06,709
"I have a gigantic schlong."
37
00:02:06,796 --> 00:02:09,973
And I'd be lying, but then
my schlong would get bigger
38
00:02:10,061 --> 00:02:12,020
because I'm lying, see?
39
00:02:12,106 --> 00:02:13,629
And then it would be true, though,
40
00:02:13,717 --> 00:02:16,328
so, um, I don't know
if it shrinks again or...
41
00:02:16,414 --> 00:02:17,871
I don't know how that works,
you know?
42
00:02:17,895 --> 00:02:20,070
I don't know what
the Pinocchio rules are.
43
00:02:20,158 --> 00:02:22,420
You know?
44
00:02:22,508 --> 00:02:24,269
Yeah, maybe it would just,
like, start growing
45
00:02:24,293 --> 00:02:25,966
and shrinking back and forth,
you know, like,
46
00:02:25,990 --> 00:02:28,252
'cause, um, 'cause it grows,
and then I'm not lying,
47
00:02:28,340 --> 00:02:29,776
and then it shrinks
since I'm lying,
48
00:02:29,864 --> 00:02:31,711
and then, you know,
it just goes back and forth.
49
00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:33,954
It's kind of going "boing,
oing, boing, boing, boing."
50
00:02:35,478 --> 00:02:37,108
And then I wouldn't even
need the chick, you know?
51
00:02:37,132 --> 00:02:39,292
I could just have my schlong
do all the work, you know?
52
00:02:40,788 --> 00:02:42,187
And I wouldn't need
my hands either.
53
00:02:44,008 --> 00:02:46,924
Can go eat lunch or something.
You know, go about my business.
54
00:02:47,010 --> 00:02:48,403
You know?
55
00:02:48,490 --> 00:02:49,890
Maybe take up a new hobby,
you know,
56
00:02:49,926 --> 00:02:52,364
like, um, like, um...
57
00:02:52,450 --> 00:02:54,131
uh, like spanking my...
Oh, no, never mind.
58
00:02:55,497 --> 00:02:56,890
That was quite a ride, Beavis.
59
00:02:58,501 --> 00:03:00,545
I guess what I'm saying,
though, is, like, um,
60
00:03:00,633 --> 00:03:03,245
is I wish I could lie a lot
and have a big schlong.
61
00:03:03,331 --> 00:03:04,985
That's all.
62
00:03:05,073 --> 00:03:08,728
That would rule.
63
00:03:08,816 --> 00:03:11,556
Uh, you know, they really should
64
00:03:11,644 --> 00:03:14,211
make a "Schlongnocchio" movie.
65
00:03:14,299 --> 00:03:15,579
'Cause then, like, Jimmy Cricket
66
00:03:15,647 --> 00:03:18,173
can get it on with Tinkerbell,
and then Peter Pan
67
00:03:18,259 --> 00:03:19,956
can grant him a real schlong,
68
00:03:20,044 --> 00:03:21,872
and they can all ride off
on Dumbo.
69
00:03:26,223 --> 00:03:28,009
And then
that cricket can be like,
70
00:03:28,096 --> 00:03:32,055
"Uh, hey, Tinkerbell,
wanna see my seventh leg?"
71
00:03:34,188 --> 00:03:35,538
Yeah.
72
00:03:35,625 --> 00:03:38,019
"Hey, Tinkerbell, hey,
how'd you like to see
73
00:03:38,105 --> 00:03:40,498
something that always grows up?
You know what I'm saying?"
74
00:03:43,110 --> 00:03:45,112
♪ If that bitch gets slick,
I'll cut the bitch ♪
75
00:03:45,199 --> 00:03:48,377
Uh, okay, Beavis,
I have an idea for a game.
76
00:03:50,335 --> 00:03:53,121
Every time she says, "bitch,"
I get to smack you.
77
00:03:53,207 --> 00:03:54,730
No way!
78
00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:57,515
Why would I do that?
79
00:03:57,603 --> 00:03:59,649
Uh, okay, how about this?
80
00:03:59,735 --> 00:04:02,259
Every time she says "butt,"
you can smack me.
81
00:04:02,347 --> 00:04:04,567
Uh, okay, yeah, I mean,
82
00:04:04,653 --> 00:04:06,481
she is the queen of butts.
83
00:04:06,568 --> 00:04:07,961
Your funeral.
84
00:04:08,049 --> 00:04:12,052
Now let the games begin.
85
00:04:12,139 --> 00:04:13,314
♪ I'll cut up the bitch ♪
86
00:04:13,401 --> 00:04:14,968
♪ I'll gut the bitch ♪
87
00:04:15,056 --> 00:04:16,598
♪ Had to fuck up the bitch ♪
- Ah! Wait, I...
88
00:04:16,622 --> 00:04:17,730
Ah! Okay, okay.
- ♪ Fuck the bitch ♪
89
00:04:17,754 --> 00:04:19,122
I can't hear
when you're smacking me!
90
00:04:19,146 --> 00:04:20,451
Ah! Wait, I think...
91
00:04:20,538 --> 00:04:21,452
Hold on!
92
00:04:21,540 --> 00:04:23,454
Why did I... ah, ah, ow!
93
00:04:23,542 --> 00:04:25,588
I can... ah! Hey!
94
00:04:25,675 --> 00:04:27,024
♪ Cut up the bitch ♪
95
00:04:27,110 --> 00:04:28,435
♪ Get the combination
to the safe ♪
96
00:04:28,459 --> 00:04:29,853
♪ And drug the bitch ♪
- I win.
97
00:04:29,939 --> 00:04:32,987
Ah, ah!
98
00:04:33,074 --> 00:04:34,683
Damn it.
99
00:04:34,771 --> 00:04:36,444
I did not think she
would say "bitch" so much
100
00:04:36,468 --> 00:04:38,034
when I agree... ah!
101
00:04:38,122 --> 00:04:40,558
Wait, Butt-Head, you can't
smack me when I say it!
102
00:04:40,646 --> 00:04:42,997
Son of a bitch.
Oh, wait, don't... ah!
103
00:04:44,346 --> 00:04:45,564
Damn it, this game sucks.
104
00:04:48,524 --> 00:04:51,918
Uh, damn it, we're out of eggs.
105
00:04:52,005 --> 00:04:53,355
Where are we gonna get more eggs
106
00:04:53,442 --> 00:04:55,792
to throw at this dumbass house?
107
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,620
Uh...
108
00:05:01,014 --> 00:05:02,103
Well, hello.
109
00:05:02,189 --> 00:05:04,800
Uh, hello.
110
00:05:04,887 --> 00:05:06,629
We, like, need some eggs.
111
00:05:06,716 --> 00:05:08,848
Yeah, a lot of 'em.
Please, yeah.
112
00:05:08,935 --> 00:05:11,024
Eggs? Of course.
113
00:05:11,112 --> 00:05:13,548
Happy to help.
114
00:05:13,636 --> 00:05:15,178
Reminds me of the old days
when a neighbor
115
00:05:15,202 --> 00:05:16,812
would ask for a cup of sugar.
116
00:05:16,899 --> 00:05:20,076
Um, okay.
Give us a cup of sugar too.
117
00:05:20,163 --> 00:05:21,035
Yeah.
118
00:05:21,122 --> 00:05:23,079
Sure, no problem.
119
00:05:23,167 --> 00:05:25,213
So what grade are you boys in?
120
00:05:25,300 --> 00:05:28,564
Uh, we don't know.
121
00:05:28,651 --> 00:05:30,435
I know what you mean.
122
00:05:30,521 --> 00:05:32,654
It all goes by so fast,
doesn't it?
123
00:05:32,742 --> 00:05:35,396
Uh, no?
124
00:05:35,483 --> 00:05:37,790
Nope.
125
00:05:37,877 --> 00:05:41,011
There you go, boys. Enjoy.
126
00:05:41,098 --> 00:05:43,579
Bye, boys.
You come back anytime now.
127
00:05:43,665 --> 00:05:45,146
Nah.
128
00:05:48,409 --> 00:05:50,454
Oh, yeah.
129
00:05:50,542 --> 00:05:54,242
That sugar really hit the spot.
- Yeah, yeah, sure did, yeah.
130
00:05:54,329 --> 00:05:56,220
You know, they should put this
in food and stuff.
131
00:05:56,244 --> 00:05:57,766
Yeah.
- Yeah, I wish.
132
00:05:59,115 --> 00:06:00,899
Now let's go egg
those buttholes.
133
00:06:00,987 --> 00:06:02,163
Yeah!
134
00:06:03,815 --> 00:06:05,644
Okay, let's kick 'em this time.
135
00:06:05,730 --> 00:06:08,038
Yeah, yeah, throwing sucks.
136
00:06:14,175 --> 00:06:15,653
Damn eggs. Ugh!
137
00:06:15,740 --> 00:06:17,829
Ah!
138
00:06:17,917 --> 00:06:21,137
Uh, did we get any eggs
on the house?
139
00:06:21,225 --> 00:06:23,401
I think so. Um...
140
00:06:23,487 --> 00:06:26,752
eh, no, I don't think so.
141
00:06:26,838 --> 00:06:28,362
Damn it.
142
00:06:28,449 --> 00:06:30,668
All right, Beavis,
I have another idea.
143
00:06:30,755 --> 00:06:32,932
Now follow me.
144
00:06:33,019 --> 00:06:35,064
Um, what is it?
145
00:06:35,151 --> 00:06:37,502
Uh, I don't know.
146
00:06:42,593 --> 00:06:45,161
Okay, Beavis, we're gonna
toilet paper their house.
147
00:06:45,249 --> 00:06:46,728
Yeah, yeah, because they suck.
148
00:06:49,340 --> 00:06:53,040
This'll teach them a lesson.
Okay, here we go, Beavis.
149
00:07:00,134 --> 00:07:01,483
Yes!
150
00:07:01,569 --> 00:07:04,180
They're gonna be so pissed off. Yeah.
151
00:07:04,267 --> 00:07:06,009
No, they're not, dumbass.
152
00:07:06,096 --> 00:07:08,271
The toilet paper
went down the sewer.
153
00:07:08,358 --> 00:07:11,274
Oh, yeah, yeah, so it did, yeah.
154
00:07:11,362 --> 00:07:12,406
Damn it.
155
00:07:12,494 --> 00:07:14,365
Now we gotta get
more toilet paper.
156
00:07:14,451 --> 00:07:15,800
Where?
157
00:07:18,369 --> 00:07:20,067
Hello.
158
00:07:20,153 --> 00:07:22,634
Uh, we need toilet paper.
159
00:07:24,418 --> 00:07:26,550
Sure, boys, always happy
to help a neighbor.
160
00:07:26,637 --> 00:07:30,120
Um, and we need a lot
because I poop too much.
161
00:07:30,206 --> 00:07:32,557
He sure does.
162
00:07:32,644 --> 00:07:35,211
You know, all that talk
of eggs and sugar last time
163
00:07:35,298 --> 00:07:38,606
put me in the mood for baking,
and I made some cookies.
164
00:07:38,694 --> 00:07:40,086
Whoa.
165
00:07:42,610 --> 00:07:44,874
Well, they sure appreciate
your baking, honey.
166
00:07:44,961 --> 00:07:47,050
Put more sugar in next time.
167
00:07:47,137 --> 00:07:48,747
Yeah, yeah, have you heard
of that stuff?
168
00:07:48,834 --> 00:07:51,141
Really good, yeah.
169
00:07:51,228 --> 00:07:52,663
- Toilet paper.
- Yes!
170
00:07:52,750 --> 00:07:54,144
Yeah, yeah.
171
00:07:54,230 --> 00:07:55,754
It's about time.
172
00:07:55,841 --> 00:07:57,973
Such good boys.
173
00:08:07,461 --> 00:08:10,812
We did it, Butt-Head!
We did it, yeah!
174
00:08:10,899 --> 00:08:13,423
Let me guess. You guys did that?
175
00:08:13,511 --> 00:08:16,297
- Yeah, we sure did.
- Yeah, it's toilet paper.
176
00:08:17,689 --> 00:08:19,735
Real smart to TP a house
177
00:08:19,822 --> 00:08:22,346
when there's a nationwide
toilet paper shortage going on.
178
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,524
Um, what?
179
00:08:26,610 --> 00:08:28,526
There's no toilet paper
in the stores right now
180
00:08:28,612 --> 00:08:31,225
because of the supply chain, genius.
181
00:08:31,312 --> 00:08:33,009
It's called following the news?
182
00:08:38,448 --> 00:08:40,755
Eh, this sucks.
183
00:08:40,842 --> 00:08:43,192
Wait a minute, Beavis,
I just thought of something.
184
00:08:43,279 --> 00:08:45,107
If we get our toilet paper back,
185
00:08:45,195 --> 00:08:47,283
we can sell it
and, like, be rich.
186
00:08:47,370 --> 00:08:49,243
Whoa!
187
00:08:49,330 --> 00:08:52,419
Damn it.
188
00:08:57,250 --> 00:09:00,688
Uh, we got toilet paper.
189
00:09:00,775 --> 00:09:03,386
Yeah, yeah, check it out.
Yeah, it's good stuff.
190
00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:06,365
You can use it on your butt,
you know,
191
00:09:06,389 --> 00:09:08,697
or blow your nose or something.
192
00:09:08,783 --> 00:09:10,611
Wow.
193
00:09:10,698 --> 00:09:12,875
For you boys to clean up
after some bad kids
194
00:09:12,961 --> 00:09:17,009
threw toilet paper on our home,
it's wonderful.
195
00:09:17,096 --> 00:09:19,229
Thank you.
- Yes.
196
00:09:19,316 --> 00:09:20,815
This is the nicest thing
anyone's done for us
197
00:09:20,838 --> 00:09:21,971
in a long while.
198
00:09:22,057 --> 00:09:24,799
Uh, what?
199
00:09:24,886 --> 00:09:27,323
Diane and I were never able
to have children
200
00:09:27,411 --> 00:09:31,633
of our own, but if we had,
we'd sure like to think
201
00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:33,155
they'd be something like you.
202
00:09:34,722 --> 00:09:36,681
Do you want the toilet paper
or not?
203
00:09:36,768 --> 00:09:39,640
Yeah, it's, like,
brand-new or something.
204
00:09:39,727 --> 00:09:41,990
Yeah, nobody wiped
their butt on it,
205
00:09:42,077 --> 00:09:44,123
not even once.
206
00:09:44,211 --> 00:09:46,168
We'll throw this out for you.
207
00:09:46,255 --> 00:09:49,259
Thank you. Thanks again.
208
00:09:49,346 --> 00:09:52,261
- Ugh, damn it.
- That sucks.
209
00:09:52,349 --> 00:09:53,784
They just stole
our toilet paper.
210
00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:58,049
Well, I did wipe my butt
on some of it, you know,
211
00:09:58,136 --> 00:09:59,878
if I'm gonna be honest.
212
00:09:59,965 --> 00:10:02,533
We should, like,
smear shaving cream everywhere
213
00:10:02,620 --> 00:10:05,187
to prank those buttholes.
- Yeah, good idea.
214
00:10:05,274 --> 00:10:07,408
Yeah.
215
00:10:07,495 --> 00:10:10,410
Um, where do we get
shaving cream though?
216
00:10:10,498 --> 00:10:12,803
Uh, I know.
217
00:10:14,501 --> 00:10:16,547
Oh, yeah, yeah.
218
00:10:17,808 --> 00:10:18,941
This is gonna be cool.
219
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:51,320
Chirp.
15196
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