Original subtitles

DO YOU REALIZE IT'S BEEN NEARLY 2 WEEKS SINCE JEN AND I BROKE UP,

AND NOT ONCE HAS SHE MADE AN EFFORT TO GET TOGETHER?

I MEAN, SPEND SOME TIME, GO TO THE MOVIES.

YOU THINK IT'S ODD?

'CAUSE IT SEEMS A LITTLE ODD TO ME.

DAWSON, YOU ARE AWARE THAT SHE BROKE UP WITH YOU, RIGHT?

OF COURSE I AM. IT'S JUST...

THERE'S A CERTAIN WAY TO HANDLE THESE THINGS,

AND I THOUGHT JEN WOULD HOLD HERSELF TO THAT STANDARD.

LOOK, DAWSON, YOU DON'T SOUND LIKE A GUY

WHO'S DISAPPOINTED IN JEN'S BREAKUP ETIQUETTE.

YOU SOUND LIKE A GUY WHO CAN'T FACE THE REALITY THAT IT'S OVER.

YOU KNOW, NOT TO SOUND HARSH,

YOU CAN'T LIVE IN THE PAST.

YOU HAVE TO START PREPARING FOR LIFE AFTER JEN.

SOMETHING TELLS ME JOEY HAS A THEORY.

OK.

THERE ARE 3 MAIN AREAS TO FOCUS ON--

PUBLIC PERCEPTION.

SUCH AS?

WELL, FROM NOW UNTIL THE END OF THE SEMESTER,

YOU'LL BE KNOWN AS THE GUY JEN DROPPED.

MOST GIRLS WILL VIEW YOU AS TAINTED GOODS,

AND, OF COURSE, THERE'LL BE THE FEW

WHO WILL FEEL INCREDIBLY SORRY FOR YOU

AND OFFER THIS CERTAIN KIND OF SYMPATHY.

AVOID THEM.

THAT'S EASY ENOUGH. WHAT'S NEXT?

OTHER GUYS.

OTHER GUYS?

LOOK, DAWSON,

YOU HAVE TO BE PREPARED FOR THE POSSIBILITY

THAT JEN WILL BEGIN DATING AGAIN.

SEEING HER AROUND SCHOOL WITH HER NEW BOYFRIEND,

WATCHING HER FROM THIS VERY WINDOW

AS SHE PAUSES COYLY BY YOUR GARDEN GATE

AND ACCEPTS A GOOD-NIGHT KISS FROM A GUY YOU FEEL

PHYSICALLY AND INTELLECTUALLY SUPERIOR TO IN EVERY WAY,

AND YOU CAN'T POSSIBLY--

OK, JOEY, I GET THE POINT.

WHAT'S THE THIRD THING?

YOU AND JEN.

ME AND JEN? YEAH.

THE INEVITABLE CONVERSATION,

WHICH, FRANKLY, I'M SURPRISED YOU HAVEN'T HAD YET.

YOU KNOW, SHE'LL ASK YOU

IF YOU THINK THE TWO OF YOU CAN BE FRIENDS AGAIN

BECAUSE SHE'D REALLY LIKE THAT, IF YOU COULD,

AND YOU SAY...

COME ON, DAWSON. YOU HAVE TO HAVE AN ANSWER.

YOU SAY...

I DON'T KNOW! I...

I WANT TO BE HER FRIEND, BUT THEN AGAIN, I DON'T.

I MEAN, HOW...

HOW CAN YOU ASSUME TO BE FRIENDS WITH SOMEONE

WHEN EVERY TIME YOU LOOK AT THEM,

ALL YOU THINK ABOUT IS HOW MUCH MORE YOU REALLY WANT?

WELL, YOU KNOW,

I'M NO EXPERT AT THIS, DAWSON,

BUT, UH...

I THINK IT CAN BE DONE.

HELLO.

YEAH, HOLD ON. SHE'S RIGHT HERE.

GALE.

HELLO. THIS IS GALE.

YOU KNOW, THIS IS PROBABLY--

YES. WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT THIS IN THE OFFICE?

YES.

OK.

GOOD-BYE.

WAS THAT CALVIN?

I WISH I'D KNOWN.

I HAVEN'T TALKED TO HIM IN A LONG TIME.

NO, IT WASN'T CALVIN.

NO? HIS VOICE SOUNDED FAMILIAR.

WHO WAS IT?

IT WAS WORK-RELATED.

IT ISN'T WHAT YOU THINK IT WAS.

HE HAS THE NERVE TO CALL HERE?

HE HAD A SIMPLE QUESTION.

OH, WELL...

YOU TELL BOB THAT THE NEXT TIME HE CALLS HERE,

THE NEXT TIME HE INTERRUPTS MY BREAKFAST TO CALL MY WIFE,

THAT THE ONLY SIMPLE QUESTION HE'LL NEED AN ANSWER FOR

IS "DO YOU HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE?"

HE DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE ANGRY WITH HIM.

YES. WONDERFUL. NO GREATER WAY TO START THE DAY

THAN HEARING MY WIFE DEFEND THE INNOCENT MOTIVATIONS

OF HER FORMER LOVER.

YOU KNOW WHAT, GALE? YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M ANGRY.

IT JUST DOESN'T HAPPEN TO BE AT BOB.

HONEY...MITCH...

MITCHELL--

DAWSON.

HI, JEN.

HI. HOW YOU DOING?

GREAT, GREAT. YOU?

GREAT, GREAT. UH...

DAWSON?

UH...

LOOK, I KNOW THAT SOMETIMES AFTER A BREAKUP,

WELL, THERE'S THAT AWKWARD PERIOD WHERE,

YOU KNOW, WHERE 2 PEOPLE

WHO USED TO HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY TO EACH OTHER

SUDDENLY FIND THEIR CONVERSATIONS

REDUCED TO THE MEREST OF SMALL TALK.

SO WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

I'M SAYING... WHAT SOMEBODY ALWAYS SAYS

AND WHAT SOMEBODY ELSE NEVER WANTS TO HEAR, BUT...

BUT DO YOU THINK IT'S POSSIBLE IN ANY CONCEIVABLE WAY

THAT WE COULD STILL BE FRIENDS, DAWSON?

SO SHE ASKED YOU IF YOU COULD BE HER FRIEND.

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING, REALLY.

I LOOKED STRAIGHT AT HER,

THEN I TOLD HER I NEEDED TIME TO THINK ABOUT IT.

THAT'S OK. WE STILL GOT SOME WORK TO DO HERE,

BUT I THINK WE CAN SALVAGE THIS.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WELL, JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME,

YOU HAVE NO INTEREST IN SIMPLY BEING JEN'S FRIEND.

I MEAN, YOU'RE STILL CARRYING AROUND THIS HUGE TORCH FOR HER

THAT HAS NO HOPE OF EXTINGUISHING ITSELF ANYTIME TOO SOON, CORRECT?

YEAH.

THE LAST PERSON WHO NEEDS TO KNOW ABOUT THIS ETERNAL FLAME IS JEN.

WHAT SERVES YOUR PURPOSE HERE IS TO LET HER KNOW

THAT YOU'RE COMPLETELY OVER HER.

IT'S YESTERDAY'S NEWS.

THAT'S THE QUICKEST WAY

TO THE ULTIMATE GOAL OF GETTING JEN BACK.

BUT HOW DO I DO THAT?

HEY, DAWS.

HEY, MARY BETH.

SO YOU HEAR? WE'RE GETTING OUR MIDTERMS BACK TODAY.

YEAH? HUH.

CAN'T WAIT.

NOW, OK, UPGRADING JEN TO GIRLFRIEND STATUS

IS REALLY A 2-PRONGED ATTACK,

BUT THE FIRST THING YOU GOTTA DO

IS LET HER KNOW THAT YOU'RE COMPLETELY COOL

WITH THE IDEA OF BEING HER FRIEND, OK?

THE QUICKER YOU CAN FEIGN SOME SORT OF INDIFFERENCE,

THE LESS SPECIAL SHE'S GONNA FEEL,

AND THE LESS SPECIAL SHE FEELS,

THE MORE SHE'S GONNA CRAVE THAT VERY SPECIAL FEELING

THAT COMES FROM BEING DAWSON LEERY'S GIRLFRIEND.

OK? IT'S A FEELING THAT'S NOT INCLUDED IN THE FRIEND PACKAGE.

I CAN DO THAT.

SO WHAT'S THE SECOND THING?

SLOW DOWN, MY FRIEND.

LET'S NOT GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES.

OK, THE RUMOR IS TRUE.

YOU WILL BE GETTING YOUR MIDTERM EXAMS BACK TODAY.

GOOD NEWS IS MOST OF YOU DID QUITE WELL.

BUT BEFORE I HAND THEM BACK,

I'D LIKE TO SEE THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE AFTER CLASS.

THOSE PEOPLE ARE...

PACEY WITTER...

WELL...

I GUESS THAT'S IT.

LOOK, PACEY, I KNOW YOU'RE A BRIGHT KID.

YOU KNOW WHAT I DID FIRST THING

AFTER I FINISHED GRADING YOUR EXAM?

STOPPED LAUGHING?

I WENT TO THE GUIDANCE OFFICE

AND LOOKED AT YOUR STANDARDIZED TEST SCORES.

YOU HAVE AN APTITUDE FOR THIS STUFF, PACEY.

SO WHEN A STUDENT WHO'S REALLY BRIGHT

MAKES A 32 ON A MIDTERM,

YOU KNOW WHOSE FAULT THAT IS?

YOURS?

OF COURSE NOT. IT'S ENTIRELY YOURS.

LOOK, MAYBE MARINE BIOLOGY'S NOT YOUR THING.

ALL RIGHT, FINE, I'M NOT OFFENDED,

BUT I'M GONNA MAKE YOU AN OFFER THAT I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU ACCEPT.

I WANT YOU TO COMPLETE AN EXTRA-CREDIT PROJECT FOR ME.

SHOW ME THAT YOU UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING THAT WE'RE LEARNING HERE,

AND I'LL PASS YOU BY THE SKIN OF YOUR TEETH.

YEAH, SURE. WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO?

WELL, FIRST, YOU HAVE TO WAIT FOR A STUDENT

FROM MY SIXTH PERIOD CLASS TO ARRIVE.

GREAT. ANOTHER ROCKET SCIENTIST, I PRESUME.

AND THEN I'M GOING TO ASSIGN A PROJECT

THAT THE TWO OF YOU WILL WORK ON AFTER SCHOOL AND ON FREE PERIODS.

HI, DR. RAND.

OH. UM... I CAN COME BACK.

NO, NO, NO. YOU'RE RIGHT ON SCHEDULE, JOEY.

I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET YOUR NEW LAB PARTNER.

HIM?

HER?

DR. RAND, I'D LIKE TO LODGE A FORMAL PROTEST.

YOU NEVER TOLD ME I WAS GONNA WORKING WITH A REPRESSED CONTROL FREAK.

YEAH, AND YOU NEVER SAID MY GRADE WAS DEPENDENT UPON SOME REMEDIAL UNDERACHIEVER.

WELL, WONDERFUL.

I SEE NO INTRODUCTIONS ARE NECESSARY.

JEN, HI.

HI.

UM, I'M A LITTLE EMBARRASSED.

YOU ASKED ME A VERY SIMPLE QUESTION EARLIER,

AND I REALLY SHOULD'VE GIVEN YOU A VERY SIMPLE ANSWER.

JEN, I WOULD LOVE TO BE YOUR FRIEND.

REALLY?

ABSOLUTELY.

AND TO EASE ANY OF YOUR REMAINING DOUBTS,

I'LL PROVE IT TO YOU.

OK.

SO...LET'S HAVE A FRIENDLY CONVERSATION.

HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

NOT TOO BAD. AND YOURSELF?

EXCELLENT, THANK YOU.

ANY EXCITING PLANS FOR THE UPCOMING WEEKEND?

LOOK, DAWSON, YOUR...

YOUR FRIENDSHIP MEANS A LOT TO ME,

BUT MAYBE THIS ISN'T SUCH A GOOD IDEA.

COME ON. WE'RE FRIENDS NOW, OK?

WHATEVER IT IS, I THINK I CAN TAKE IT.

OK. OK, WELL, THEN IN THE NAME OF FRIENDSHIP,

HOWEVER MISGUIDED, I...

I HAVE A DATE WITH CLIFF THIS WEEKEND.

WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL ON SATURDAY.

IS THAT WHAT YOU DIDN'T WANT TO TELL ME?

I MEAN, 'CAUSE QUITE FRANKLY, I'M RELIEVED.

YOU'RE RELIEVED?

THE TRUTH IS, I ALSO HAVE A DATE THIS WEEKEND,

AND WE'RE GOING TO THE CARNIVAL.

ISN'T THAT A COINCIDENCE?

YEAH, IT IS. UH...

YOU KNOW, IF YOU WANT US TO GO SOMEPLACE ELSE,

WE CAN EASILY CHANGE OUR PLANS.

CHANGE YOUR PLANS?

JEN, WE SHOULDN'T RUN AWAY FROM THESE THINGS.

WE SHOULD LOOK AT THEM AS OPPORTUNITIES.

OPPORTUNITIES FOR WHAT?

FOR, UM... A DOUBLE DATE.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

OF COURSE I'M SERIOUS.

WHAT DO YOU SAY? THE FOUR OF US.

WELL, I'D SAY IT'S A LITTLE UNEXPECTED.

UM...

BUT HEY, IF YOU'RE OK WITH IT.

COMPLETELY. YEAH.

OK.

GREAT.

ALL RIGHT. GREAT.

SO I WILL SEE YOU SATURDAY.

YEAH.

IT'S NOT REALLY ALL THAT BAD, DAWSON.

REMEMBER HOW I TOLD YOU GETTING JEN BACK WAS A 2-PART PROCESS?

YEAH.

WELL, THIS IS THE SECOND PART.

WHAT, HUMILIATING MYSELF AT AN AMUSEMENT PARK?

NO, MAN. DATING OTHER WOMEN.

THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO LET JEN SEE YOU IN ACTION

WITH OTHER GIRLS.

NOW, I'LL ADMIT THAT GOING ON A DOUBLE-DATE WITH THE EX

IS KIND OF AN ADVANCE MANEUVER,

BUT HIGH RISK, HIGH REWARD.

THIS COULD BE EXACTLY THE THING YOU'RE LOOKING FOR.

EXCEPT FOR ONE THING.

WHAT'S THAT?

MY COMPANION FOR SATURDAY

IS AT THIS POINT FICTION.

BUT THAT'S NOT REALLY A PROBLEM.

I ADMIT, IT'S KIND OF SHORT NOTICE,

BUT THERE'S A LOT OF YOUNG LADIES

WHO WOULD GIVE UP THEIR VERY UNEVENTFUL PLANS

FOR A DATE WITH DAWSON LEERY. HUH?

YEAH.

IN FACT, I THINK I HAVE THE PERFECT CANDIDATE RIGHT THERE.

MARY BETH.

OH, HI, DAWSON. YOU MIND IF I JOIN YOU?

OH, NO, NO. THAT WOULD BE NICE.

LOOK, I WAS, I WAS...

MAYBE THIS IS SHORT NOTICE,

AND IF IT IS, I APOLOGIZE,

BUT I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANTED TO SORT OF...

GO OUT WITH ME ON SATURDAY.

SATURDAY?

LIKE ON A DATE?

YEAH, OF COURSE.

IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG?

NO.

YEAH. WELL, YEAH.

IT'S JUST, I, UM, I KNOW THAT YOU JUST BROKE UP WITH JEN.

AND WHILE I DON'T KNOW THE PARTICULARS OF IT ALL,

I DO KNOW THAT IT'S A COMMON MISTAKE MADE BY MANY PEOPLE

TO BEGIN TO DATE BEFORE THEY'RE REALLY READY.

I'M READY.

COMPLETELY READY.

COULD NOT BE MORE READY.

HONEST?

HONEST.

BOY, THIS IS FASCINATING.

I'M SORRY THERE ARE NO CARTOONS

TO MAKE THIS INTERESTING FOR YOU, PACEY,

BUT IT'S NOT DESIGNED TO BE FASCINATING.

IT'S DESIGNED TO BE EDUCATIONAL.

WELL, THANK YOU, DR. SCHWEITZER.

NOW REFRESH MY MEMORY AS TO WHY WE'RE HERE AGAIN.

WE'RE OBSERVING THE REPRODUCTIVE PROCESS OF PULMONATA SNAILS,

AND DR. RAND SAID THAT THEY REPRODUCE MORE WHEN THEY'RE HAPPY,

SO BY VARYING THE CONTENTS OF THE TANK,

WE CAN DETERMINE WHICH FACTORS

ARE MOST CONDUCIVE TO REPRODUCTION.

WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY THAT?

WE'LL BUY 'EM A COUPLE DRINKS, TURN OFF THE LIGHT,

AND JUST COME BACK IN A COUPLE DAYS.

YOU NEVER FAIL TO DISAPPOINT, DO YOU, PACEY?

I MEAN, WHY DID I ACTUALLY THINK

THAT THE VERY REAL PROSPECTS

OF REPEATING MARINE BIOLOGY NEXT SUMMER

MIGHT CAUSE YOU TO TAKE THIS PROJECT SERIOUSLY?

PLEASE. SUMMER SCHOOL?

YEAH.

IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN.

ONLY MORONS GO TO SUMMER SCHOOL.

YEAH, WELL, THE LAST TIME I CHECKED,

YOU WERE PULLING A STELLAR F-MINUS,

SO WITHOUT THIS EXTRA-CREDIT PROJECT, PACEY,

I'M VERY WELL CERTAIN

THAT YOUR GRADE WILL NOT ONLY PLACE YOU SQUARELY AMONG THE MORONS,

BUT YOU MAY VERY WELL BE THEIR LEADER.

HEY.

SORRY TO INTERRUPT.

I WAS JUST WONDERING

IF ANYONE HAD CALLED THAT I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT.

NOPE. NOTHING.

UH, WHAT ABOUT YESTERDAY?

UM, ANY CALLS YESTERDAY?

HEY, COME ON. I ALWAYS LEAVE YOUR MESSAGES ON THE LITTLE PAD

RIGHT NEXT TO THE ANSWERING MACHINE.

FORGIVE ME, DAWSON.

MAYBE I'M NOT BEING CLEAR.

I DIDN'T ASK IF ANYONE HAD CALLED FOR ME PERSONALLY.

I ASKED IF ANYONE HAD CALLED...

THAT I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT.

NO.

HE DIDN'T CALL.

AH, WELL, THEN... VERY GOOD.

THANK YOU, DAWSON.

PACEY, IT WAS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY LAST NIGHT

TO CHECK ON THESE SNAILS,

AND NOW LOOK AT 'EM. THEY'RE DEAD.

THEIR SHELLS ARE COMPLETELY EMPTY.

I KNOW. I'M SORRY. I REALLY AM.

IT'S RIDICULOUS.

YESTERDAY, WE HAD A SCIENCE PROJECT,

AND TODAY, WE HAVE, WHAT, 2/3 OF A CHARM BRACELET?

I'M JUST GONNA TELL DR. RAND

THAT THIS EXPERIMENT WITHIN AN EXPERIMENT

JUST ISN'T WORKING OUT.

BEFORE YOU RUN OFF TO DR. RAND,

THERE IS AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS. THERE IS.

ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW HOW YOU SAID THIS EXPERIMENT WAS ALL ABOUT SEEING

WHICH ENVIRONMENT WAS BEST FOR THESE SNAILS, RIGHT?

SO, I DID COME IN LAST NIGHT,

AND I WAS WATCHING THE SNAILS,

AND THERE'S NOTHING HAPPENING,

SO I ADDED SOME FOOD,

AND THEN I ADDED SOME WATER,

AND THERE WAS STILL NOTHING HAPPENING IN THERE,

SO I THOUGHT MAYBE THE PROBLEM WASN'T THE ENVIRONMENT.

MAYBE THESE SNAILS, THEY JUST DIDN'T LIKE EACH OTHER.

RIGHT? MAYBE THEY JUST NEEDED TO LOOSEN UP A LITTLE.

PACEY, I TOLD YOU YESTERDAY.

PULMONATA SNAILS ARE SINGLE-SEX.

THEY DON'T NEED ANOTHER ORGANISM TO REPRODUCE.

RIGHT, AND I WOULD'VE REMEMBERED THAT

IF I ACTUALLY LISTEN WHEN YOU TALKED TO ME,

BUT I JUST THOUGHT THAT MAYBE SNAILS ARE JUST LIKE GUYS.

YOU KNOW, THAT THEIR ULTIMATE FANTASY

IS TO BE WITH 2 FEMALE SNAILS AT THE SAME TIME.

MAYBE THAT'S WHAT THIS PROJECT NEEDED TO GET MOVING ALONG.

LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.

YOU'VE TRIED TO CREATE SOME SORT OF A SNAIL MéNAGE Ä TROIS?

IT SOUNDS STUPID WHEN YOU SAY IT OUT LOUD,

BUT I JUST SAW THIS REALLY PRETTY SNAIL

IN THE TANK OVER BY THE WINDOW,

AND I DON'T KNOW.

LAST NIGHT, IT JUST SEEMED REALLY BRILLIANT.

LET ME FILL YA IN ON SOMETHING HERE.

YOU KNOW THIS PRETTY LITTLE SNAIL

OVER HERE BY THE WINDOW?

IT'S WHAT YOU CALL A CARNIVOROUS SNAIL,

AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT CARNIVOROUS SNAILS EAT?

OTHER SNAILS.

YEAH, OTHER SNAILS.

OTHER SNAILS SUCH AS OUR SNAILS,

SUCH AS THE SNAILS WE'RE DESPERATELY RELYING ON

TO RAISE OUR MARINE BIOLOGY GRADES.

OK. I'M SORRY, OK?

I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THIS PROJECT WAS FOR YOU.

OK, TO US. OK.

SO WHATEVER I NEED TO DO, OK?

HOWEVER I CAN MAKE THIS UP TO YOU, JOEY.

I'M DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, DAWSON.

IT'S OBVIOUS THAT YOU'RE JUST USING MARY BETH TO MAKE JEN JEALOUS.

YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT?

I'M A HEEL OF THE WORST KIND.

THE KIND THAT PREYS UPON AN INNOCENT YOUNG GIRL

WITH SOME INEXPLICABLE CRUSH ON ME

AND CONVINCES HER TO GO OUT WITH ME FOR MY OWN PERSONAL GAIN.

WELL, IF YOU KNOW THAT, THEN DON'T DO IT.

JUST CALL HER UP AND SAY YOU HAVE TO STAY IN TO...

WASH YOUR HAIR OR SOMETHING.

I CAN'T, JOEY. THAT'S JUST IT.

I KNOW IF I WAS REALLY THE PERSON I THOUGHT I WAS,

I WOULD HAVE ENOUGH CONSIDERATION FOR MARY BETH'S FEELINGS

AND CANCEL THE DATE, BUT I DON'T KNOW.

I JUST... I DON'T FEEL LIKE MYSELF LATELY, YOU KNOW?

ANYWAY, PACEY SAYS I SHOULD LOOK AT THIS AS AN OPPORTUNITY.

WAIT A SECOND. YOU'RE TAKING ROMANTIC ADVICE FROM A GUY

WHO SPENT HIS EVENING TRYING TO GET 3 SNAILS TO SLEEP WITH EACH OTHER?

YEAH, WHEN YOU PUT IT THAT WAY...

LOOK, DAWSON, YOUR LITTLE DEPARTURE INTO JERKDOM

IS UNDERSTANDABLE, PERHAPS, BUT IT'S NOTHING TO BE PROUD OF.

JUST PROMISE YOU WON'T MAKE A HABIT OF IT.

JOE, I WON'T. I PROMISE.

BECAUSE DESPITE CURRENT EVIDENCE TO THE CONTRARY,

YOU'RE ONE OF THE GOOD ONES, DAWSON.

AND THE OTHER SIDE IS POPULATED ENOUGH. TRUST ME.

JOE, ALL THINGS CONSIDERED,

I REALLY WISH I WAS TAKING YOU WITH ME TODAY.

WELL...

ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, I...

I KIND OF WISH YOU WERE, TOO.

COME ON, JOEY. LET'S GET A MOVE ON.

I SEE MY DEVIANT LAB PARTNER HAS ARRIVED.

PACEY'S GRACIOUSLY VOLUNTEERED TO TRANSPORT ME TO THE TIDAL POOL

SO WE CAN FIND A PAIR OF SUITABLE REPLACEMENT SNAILS.

I'LL SEE YA.

DAWSON!

MARY BETH. HI.

HI.

UM, HI.

SO IS IT TOO FORWARD

IF I TELL YOU THAT YOU LOOK REALLY NICE?

NO, IT'S NOT. THANKS. SO DO YOU.

OH, NO. YOU SHOULDN'T FEEL OBLIGATED TO SAY THAT.

I MEAN, UH, I MEAN, I'M, UH...

LET'S JUST START OVER AGAIN. HI. I'M MARY BETH.

DAWSON.

PERFECT! LOOKS LIKE WE'RE JUST IN TIME FOR INTRODUCTIONS, HUH?

HI.

YEAH. MARY BETH, THIS IS JEN LINDLEY AND CLIFF HER DATE.

HI. MARY BETH, IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.

UH, SAME HERE, I THINK.

UM, DAWSON, A WORD, PLEASE.

UM, WE'LL CATCH UP.

THIS WASN'T A FREAK COINCIDENCE, WAS IT?

IN A WORD, NO.

LOOK, MAYBE ON YOUR PLANET TAKING AN EX-GIRLFRIEND

ON A DOUBLE DATE IS A GOOD IDEA,

BUT WHERE I COME FROM, IT'S NOT.

IN FACT, IT'S A DECIDEDLY LOUSY IDEA,

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU FAIL TO INFORM YOUR EVENING'S COMPANION.

WAIT.

IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

WELL, BEFORE YOU TELL ME WHAT I THINK, LET ME TELL YOU.

I THINK IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS THAT YOU'RE STILL HUNG UP ON HER.

NO. MARY BETH--

NO. PLEASE KNOW THAT I AM NOT OFTEN WRONG ABOUT THESE THINGS.

UNTIL NOW.

HUMOR ME.

OK. HERE'S THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH.

I'VE OFTEN REGARDED TROLLING FOR SNAILS

AS ONE OF THE MORE UNDERRATED WAYS

TO SPEND ONE'S LEISURE TIME.

DESPITE WHAT YOU MAY THINK,

THIS ISN'T MY FIRST CHOICE FOR A SATURDAY AFTERNOON, EITHER.

BUT THEN AGAIN, I WASN'T THE ONE

WHO TRIED TO TURN OUR AQUARIUM

INTO PLATO'S RETREAT NOW, WAS I?

ACTUALLY, JOEY, I'M REALLY CURIOUS ABOUT SOMETHING.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE THIS GREAT STUDENT,

SO WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU ON THIS MIDTERM, HUH?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT HAPPENED?

WELL, WHAT GRADE DID YOU GET?

WAS IT A MASSIVE FAILURE LIKE MINE

OR JUST ONE OF THOSE NEAR MISSES?

I'M DYING TO KNOW.

YOU KNOW WHAT? WE'RE ALMOST THERE,

AND WE DON'T HAVE A LOT OF TIME,

SO LET'S JUST SAVE THE CHITCHAT FOR LATER, OK?

SO YOU'RE REALLY DOING THIS FOR JEN?

EXACTLY.

OH. IT'S ONE OF HER FIRST DATES WITH CLIFF.

SHE PROBABLY DOESN'T WANNA BE ALONE WITH HIM.

PROBABLY DOESN'T EVEN KNOW IF SHE REALLY LIKES HIM.

SO IN ORDER TO TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF,

SHE ASKS YOU TO MAKE IT A DOUBLE.

GOD, DAWSON, THAT IS REALLY VERY SWEET OF YOU.

REALLY, DON'T MENTION IT.

NO. I CAN IMAGINE SOME OF THESE GUYS

EVEN TRYING TO SABOTAGE THEIR EX-GIRLFRIEND'S DATE.

REALLY?

THAT'S TERRIBLE.

YEAH, I KNOW.

SO, ANYWAY, WHAT SHOULD WE DO NOW?

UM...

THANK YOU.

AW...

I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA.

ALL RIGHT, PACEY.

THE WATER'S GETTING KIND OF HIGH,

SO WE SHOULD PROBABLY--

PACEY.

WHAT?

PLEASE TELL ME THAT YOU TIED OUR BOAT UP,

AND THE ONE THAT'S FLOATING DOWNSTREAM ISN'T OURS.

I TIED OUR BOAT UP,

AND THE ONE THAT'S FLOATING DOWNSTREAM ISN'T OURS.

GREAT.

OOH, TOUGH LUCK, D-MAN.

AND WE'VE GOT A WINNER.

ALL RIGHT, WHICH ONE?

GO AHEAD, YOU DECIDE. I TRUST YOU.

GREAT. UH, WE'LL TAKE...

THAT ONE.

BIG CAT FOR THE LITTLE LADY.

I THINK THE FERRIS WHEEL IS WORKING AGAIN,

SO IF ANYBODY WANTS TO TAKE A RIDE...

ONCE MORE. YOU AND ME.

WHAT'S THAT?

YOU HEARD ME. RACK 'EM!

LOOK, DAWSON, THERE'S NO SHAME IN LOSING HERE.

I DID COME IN THIRD IN PITCH, HIT, AND RUN REGIONALS

LAST SUMMER IN BOSTON, SO IF YOU DON'T WANNA GET--

YOUR TURN.

OOH.

CLASSIC PISSING CONTEST.

AFTER YOU.

OH, DAWS...

NO PRESSURE, MAN, ALL RIGHT?

YES!

WE GOT A WINNER.

SO, MY FRIEND, WHO'S THE LUCKY LADY?

UM...

WE NEED TO TALK.

LOOK, IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

THE BOAT WILL WASH ASHORE EVENTUALLY.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT, THE BOAT ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN.

I SHOULD'VE KNOWN THAT ONCE YOU DID IN OUR SNAILS

THAT I WOULDN'T BE FAR BEHIND. OHH.

GOD, I'M FREEZING.

LISTEN, IT'S JUST A LITTLE COLD WATER, ALL RIGHT?

YOU'RE GONNA SURVIVE.

IT'S A PREDICTION I MAKE WITH ALL DUE REGRET AT THIS POINT.

CLEVER. YOU KNOW, SPEAKING OF SURVIVAL,

I THOUGHT CREATURES WITH YOUR LEVEL OF BRAIN POWER

WENT EXTINCT A FEW YEARS BACK.

IT'S AMAZING. PERSONALITY LIKES YOURS,

YOU STILL CAN'T GET ANY DATES.

EVEN MORE AMAZING.

PERSONALITY LIKE YOURS, AND YOU CAN.

WE'LL GET SOME DRY CLOTHES

WHEN WE GET OVER TO YOUR HOUSE.

RIGHT NOW, JUST CHANGE INTO THIS.

A BLANKET?

YOU WANT ME TO CHANGE INTO THAT?

YEAH, TAKE OFF YOUR WET CLOTHES,

WRAP THIS AROUND YOU, JUST LIKE I'M GONNA DO.

WAIT A SECOND. YOU WANT ME TO GET NAKED?

PLEASE. THIS IS NOT FOR MY ENJOYMENT.

IT'S SO YOU DON'T GET SICK. BUT IF YOU GOT YOUR HEART SET ON PNEUMONIA,

THEN FEEL FREE.

FINE.

NO PEEKING.

OH, YEAH. THE IDEA OF SEEING YOU IN YOUR BIRTHDAY SUIT

IS REALLY MY IDEA OF A THRILL.

I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO WOULD CONSIDER YOU A VERY LUCKY WOMAN.

MANY PEOPLE WOULD CONSIDER YOU A VERY DELUDED MAN.

OK.

ALL SET OVER HERE.

HOW YOU DOIN'?

YOU TAKE ONE MORE STEP IN THIS DIRECTION,

AND I CAN ALMOST GUARANTEE YOU A PERMANENT DISABILITY.

TELL YOU WHAT.

WHY DON'T I JUST START THE CAR?

GOOD IDEA.

WHAT?

JUST--NOTHING.

WHAT? WHAT'S THAT SMILE OF YOURS?

IS IT BECAUSE I LOOK RIDICULOUS?

NO.

OR IS IT THAT MY MISFORTUNE AMUSES YOU?

OR MAYBE IT'S SOMETHING YOU JUST ENJOY--

PUTTING ME IN THE MOST AWKWARD SITUATIONS

AND JUST WATCHING ME SQUIRM, PACEY.

NO, IT'S NONE OF THAT.

I WAS JUST THINKING TO MYSELF

THAT WHEN YOU LOOSEN UP, YOU'RE NOT HALF BAD TO BE AROUND.

BORDERING ON FUN, EVEN.

HOME, JEEVES.

HA HA. YES, MISS DAISY.

MARY BETH.

OH, GOD. I'M SO EMBARRASSED.

GOOD OLD MARY BETH.

CREATING SCENES WHEREVER SHE GOES.

PLEASE. I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED.

I OWE YOU AN EXPLANATION,

AND THIS TIME, I OWE YOU THE TRUTH.

YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE UPSET WITH ME

BECAUSE EVERYTHING THAT YOU SAID BEFORE,

EVERYTHING THAT I CONVINCED YOU WASN'T THE TRUTH,

WELL, IT WAS. YOU WERE RIGHT.

I'M NOT OVER JEN. NOT NEARLY.

AND I'M ON THIS DATE NOT TO HELP HER,

BUT TO GET HER BACK.

DAWSON, YOU'RE A NICE GUY. I LIKE YOU.

DO I LIKE YOU LIKE YOU?

NO. YOU'RE A LITTLE TOO NEUROTIC FOR THAT.

OK. HA HA HA.

WELL, THEN, WHY DID YOU GO OUT WITH ME?

FIRST, I FELT SORRY FOR YOU.

IT WAS CLEAR YOU WERE STILL HUNG UP ON JEN,

BUT I DON'T KNOW. YOU SEEMED HARMLESS ENOUGH,

AND MY SATURDAY WASN'T EXACTLY ACTION-PACKED.

OK. SO IF IT WASN'T MY FEELINGS FOR JEN THAT UPSET YOU,

WHAT WAS IT?

MARY BETH?

DO YOU EVER NOTICE THE WAY CLIFF'S EYES

SORT OF SMILE WHEN HE TALKS TO YOU?

OH, GOD. YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON CLIFF?

IT WAS AT THAT MOMENT THAT I FULLY PROCESSED

THAT HE HAS ABSOLUTELY NO INTEREST IN ME.

HE'S TOTALLY HUNG UP ON JEN.

HE IS.

SHE'S PRETTY HUNG UP ON HIM, TOO.

SHE IS?

AFRAID SO.

MOVE OVER.

OF COURSE, THIS DOESN'T MEAN

THAT WE STILL CAN'T HELP EACH OTHER OUT.

YOU HAVING A NICE TIME, JEN?

YEAH. YEAH, IT'S GREAT.

ALL RIGHT, YOU READY?

READY.

LET'S DO IT.

LOOKS LIKE WE'RE FINALLY NEXT, HUH?

PERFECT. SO, CLIFF,

WHY DON'T YOU RIDE WITH ME?

'CAUSE WE'VE HARDLY CHATTED ALL NIGHT.

UH, BUT...

THANKS FOR THE CLOTHES, JOE.

OH, DON'T THANK ME. THANK BODIE. THEY'RE HIS.

YOU KNOW, JOEY, WE ARE ON DRY LAND,

AND YOU NEVER DID ANSWER MY QUESTION.

AND WHAT QUESTION WAS THAT?

YOUR MIDTERM GRADE.

LISTEN, I KNOW YOU'RE A LITTLE EMBARRASSED,

SO LET ME JUST REMOVE THE STIGMA.

I GOT SOMEWHERE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD OF A 32.

PACEY...

COME ON, JOEY. JUST TOSS IT OUT THERE.

NO.

NO. OK, THEN LET ME GUESS AT IT.

58, 38, 18.

98.

9-8? WHICH ONE WAS IT, A 9 OR AN 8?

BOTH OF THEM, OK?

OK. I ASSUME THERE'S A SUITABLE EXPLANATION

FOR THAT STORY, RIGHT, JOE?

YOU WANT AN EXPLANATION?

LOOK AROUND YOU, PACEY.

LOOK AT WHAT MY LIFE IS.

I'M A BORDER IN MY SISTER'S HOUSE.

I SHARE MY BEDROOM WITH THE LIVING ROOM,

AND MY SOCIAL LIFE

CONSISTS OF A PART-TIME JOB.

AS FAR AS I CAN TELL, THERE ARE ONLY 2 WAYS TO MAKE MY LIFE BETTER.

THE ONE THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE WAKING UP

AND DISCOVERING IT'S ALL BEEN A DREAM

INVOLVES A COLLEGE SCHOLARSHIP.

WHEN I APPLY, I BETTER HAVE THE GRADES THAT DON'T GIVE THEM A CHOICE

BECAUSE A SCHOLARSHIP IS PRETTY MUCH

MY ONLY WAY OUT OF CAPESIDE.

AND IF I DON'T GET OUT OF HERE, PACEY, WELL...

I'LL BE A SADDER STORY THAN I CARE TO IMAGINE.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY, JOE.

YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT OUT OF HERE.

YOU'RE GONNA GO TO SOME GREAT SCHOOL

AND SEND ME POSTCARDS BACK HERE,

WHERE I'LL BE TENDING BAR OR PUMPING GAS.

COME ON, PACEY, YOU'LL GET OUT, TOO.

YEAH, IF THE CIRCUS IS HIRING.

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, THOUGH.

I WOULDN'T BET AGAINST THAT POTTER GIRL.

SO, YOU HAVING FUN TONIGHT, OR WHAT?

YES.

IS THAT A YES TO THE FUN OR YES TO THE WHAT?

THE FUN. OHH.

GREAT.

I'M SURE THEY'LL HAVE IT FIXED IN A MINUTE.

YEAH.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I FIND FASCINATING?

IS THAT THE WORDFLAMMABLE AND INFLAMMABLE

MEAN THE EXACT SAME THING.

ISN'T THAT BIZARRE?

SO YOU AND CLIFF SEEM PRETTY TOGETHER.

I WOULDN'T EXACTLY SAY THAT.

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY?

I WOULD SAY IT'S ONLY A DATE.

UM, I WOULD SAY WE'RE JUST GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER,

AND I WOULD ALSO SAY

THAT I DON'T THINK I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS WITH YOU ANYMORE.

DAWSON, I KNOW I MADE A BIG DEAL

OUT OF REMAINING FRIENDS WITH YOU,

AND AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING RUDE,

I THINK I SHOULD RETRACT MY OFFER.

WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

IT MEANS YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE.

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WANTED TO COME OR WHY I LET YOU,

BUT AT THIS POINT IN TIME, I REALLY DON'T THINK

THAT A SEAMLESS TRANSITION INTO FRIENDSHIP

IS IN THE CARDS FOR US, DAWSON.

I'M NOT SURE YOU'D HAVE TIME FOR ME ANYHOW,

WHAT WITH YOUR HECTIC DATING SCHEDULE AND WHATNOT.

YOU KNOW, I WOULD LOVE IF WE COULD GET OFF THIS FERRIS WHEEL

WITHOUT INSULTING EACH OTHER ANY FURTHER.

OH, AM I INSULTING YOU, JEN?

IS THAT WHAT I'M DOING?

BECAUSE THAT'S NOT MY INTENT.

MY INTENT, SINCE WE SUDDENLY SEEM TO HAVE THE TIME FOR IT,

IS ASK FOR ONE SMALL CLARIFICATION.

AND WHAT'S THAT?

OK. WHEN YOU BROKE UP WITH ME,

AMONG THE MANY QUESTIONS THAT I ASKED YOU WAS WHY?

DO YOU REMEMBER THAT?

AND DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR RESPONSE?

YOUR VERY CONVINCING, VERY HEARTFELT RESPONSE

IS YOU NEEDED TO BE ALONE.

THAT THERE WERE TOO MANY MEN IN YOUR LIFE

AND THAT YOU NEEDED TIME AWAY FROM THOSE MEN.

DAWSON--

AND CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG, JEN,

BUT CLIFF ELLIOT ISN'T EXACTLY WITH THE WOMEN'S AUXILIARY.

IT'S A DATE, ALL RIGHT?

IT'S NOT LIKE I'M PLANNING OUR ENGAGEMENT PARTY.

THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TELL ME THE TRUTH?

WHY DIDN'T YOU...

WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY WHAT I'M ONLY NOW,

MUCH TO MY DISMAY AND EMBARRASSMENT,

BEGINNING TO REALIZE?

THAT YOU WEREN'T TIRED OF MEN.

YOU WERE JUST SIMPLY TIRED OF ME.

HEY, THAT IS NOT TRUE.

DAWSON, ALL RIGHT--

OH, IT'S NOT? PROVE ME WRONG, JEN.

LOOK AT ME AND TELL ME THAT I WAS WRONG,

THAT I COMPLETELY MISREAD THIS SITUATION.

JEN, LOOK AT ME.

I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS RIGHT NOW, ALL RIGHT?

YOU ASKED ME 2 QUESTIONS A MINUTE AGO,

AND I'D LIKE TO ANSWER THEM.

FIRST OF ALL, WHY AM I HERE?

FOR ALL THE OBVIOUS REASONS.

ALL THE CLICHÉS ABOUT THE EX-BOYFRIEND

WHO'S STILL HUNG UP ON HIS EX,

WHO DOESN'T WANT TO SAY GOOD-BYE,

WHO CAN'T LET GO.

AND WHY DID YOU ALLOW ME TO COME?

COULD IT BE, COULD IT POSSIBLY BE

THAT YOUR REASONS ARE THE SAME AS MINE?

THAT YOU NEED ME JUST AS MUCH AS I NEED YOU?

JEN?

DAWSON...

OH.

O-OK. JUST...

JUST DON'T TELL ME THAT I WAS WRONG.

YEAH. YEAH.

ANYHOW...

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?

OH, JUST CHECKING OUT SOME OF THE FAMED CAPESIDE NIGHT LIFE.

OHH.

ACTUALLY, I NEEDED TO TALK YOU YOU, DAWSON.

OK.

IN PRIVATE.

ALL RIGHT.

SO HOW'D TONIGHT GO FOR YOU?

LET ME PUT IT THIS WAY... TERRIBLY.

YOU?

WASN'T SO BAD, ACTUALLY.

UH, AND THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.

I GOTTA ASK YOUR PERMISSION FOR SOMETHING.

PERMISSION?

YEAH. YOU KNOW THAT JOEY AND I

HAVE NEVER PARTICULARLY LIKED EACH OTHER, RIGHT?

THAT'S WHY IT SEEMED LIKE SUCH A BAD IDEA

WHEN WE GOT STUCK TOGETHER ON THAT MARINE BIO THING,

BUT FUNNY THING IS...

IT WASN'T.

AND SOMEWHERE, SOMEHOW IN THERE,

I NOT ONLY STOPPED DISLIKING HER SO MUCH,

I ACTUALLY CAME TO SORT OF LIKE HER.

AS A FRIEND.

AT FIRST.

OK, "AT FIRST" IMPLIES THAT YOUR FEELINGS FOR JOEY

HAVE SOMEHOW GROWN BEYOND THE FRIENDSHIP STAGE.

THAT'S GOOD. 'CAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I MEANT TO IMPLY.

YOU HAVE THE HOTS FOR JOEY?

PACEY, WHAT HAVE YOU, LIKE,

BEEN INHALING TOO MANY LAB CHEMICALS?

YOU AND JOEY ARE MORTAL ENEMIES.

DO YOU MIND KEEPING YOUR VOICE DOWN?

THIS IS NOT EXACTLY PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE AT THIS POINT.

YOU'RE SERIOUS.

YEAH.

OK.

SO YOU LIKE JOEY.

WHAT DO YOU NEED MY PERMISSION FOR?

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SAY THIS,

BUT I KNOW YOU TWO HAVE THIS LONG, TORTURED SUBTEXT TOGETHER.

I JUST--I WANTED TO MAKE SURE

THAT IF I WAS TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS,

LIKE KISS HER OR WHATEVER,

THAT I WOULDN'T BE STEPPING ON ANY TOES.

LOOK, YOU'RE MY FRIEND.

JOEY'S MY FRIEND.

I DON'T CARE WHO SHE KISSES.

BUT IF IT'S YOU, SO MUCH THE BETTER.

MY 2 BEST FRIENDS KISSING.

WHAT COULD BE BETTER THAN THAT?

GREAT. SO THEN YOU'RE COOL WITH THIS, THEN?

YEAH.

EXCELLENT. ALL RIGHT, DAWSON. I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

ALL RIGHT.

NO. WAIT. I'M NOT COOL WITH THIS.

YOU'RE NOT.

NO.

SO WHAT DO WE DO NOW?

NOTHING.

NOTHING. 'CAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT? 'CAUSE I AM FINE WITH IT.

MOMENTARY LAPSE THERE.

I JUST--I COULDN'T BE MORE FINE WITH IT. YEAH.

GO FOR IT. KISS HER. GO AHEAD. YOU HAVE MY BLESSING.

YOU'RE SURE THIS TIME?

ABSOLUTELY.

DEFINITELY. YEAH.

OK.

SO...

AM I GONNA HAVE TO FAIL ANOTHER MIDTERM,

OR CAN WE DO THIS AGAIN SOMETIME?

OH, WE STILL HAVE A REPORT TO FINISH, PACEY,

SO I'M PRETTY SURE WE'RE GONNA BE SPENDING A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER.

ACTUALLY, THAT'S NOT WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT, JOEY?

THEN WHAT DID YOU MEAN?

WELL, LET ME PUT IT TO YOU THIS WAY...

PACEY!

JEEZ, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?

HEH HEH. WELL, IF I HAVE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF,

IT CLEARLY DIDN'T HAVE THE DESIRED EFFECT.

WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD-- I MEAN, I GUESS I KNOW WHY YOU WOULD,

BUT WHY WOULD YOU?

WHY? 'CAUSE I REALLY HAD A NICE TIME TODAY.

A NICE TIME THAT EXCEEDED MY WILDEST EXPECTATIONS.

I WAS--I WAS CONFUSED AND SURPRISED

AND ATTRACTED.

YOU?

WELL, CONFUSED AND SURPRISED.

BUT NOT...

SORRY.

THAT'S OK.

I CAN DEAL WITH THE REJECTION PRETTY EFFORTLESSLY.

JUST SO LONG AS WE DON'T EXTEND THIS REALLY AWKWARD MOMENT

ANY LONGER THAN WE HAVE TO.

OK. UH...

GOOD NIGHT, PACEY.

I HAD A NICE TIME, TOO, TODAY.

I'LL SEE YA.

JOE...

YEAH?

IF BY SOME SLIM CHANCE

YOU HAD ACTUALLY KISSED ME BACK...

YOU'D HAVE PROBABLY BEEN THINKING OF SOMEBODY ELSE, RIGHT?

LET IT RING.

HEY, FELLAS. LOOK.

FIGURED YOU'D BE HERE.

SO LISTEN.

WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT BEFORE, WHAT YOU WERE ASKING ME.

I CHANGED MY MIND. I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO IT.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO REFRESH MY MEMORY

SO WE'RE ON THE SAME PAGE HERE.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

JOEY. YOU DON'T WANT ME TO KISS JOEY?

WHOO. YOU SEEM A LITTLE WORKED UP HERE.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREAK THIS TO YA...

BREAK WHAT TO ME?

WELL, YOU'RE A LITTLE LATE.

YOU KISSED HER?

OH, YEAH.

NOT ONLY THAT, SHE KISSED ME BACK

RIGHT THERE IN THE FRONT SEAT

OF THE WITTER FAMILY TRUCK.

PLAYED TONSIL HOCKEY FOR ABOUT AN HOUR.

SHE INVITES ME IN,

BUT IT WAS A LITTLE LATE, SO I DIDN'T.

SHE'S COOKING FOR ME TOMORROW NIGHT.

SHE SAYS SHE ALWAYS WANTED TO COOK FOR THE RIGHT MAN.

I GUESS SHE FOUND HIM.

WE WERE THINKING ABOUT HEADING UP TO THIS

COZY LITTLE B AND B UP THE COAST.

SPEND A LITTLE QUALITY TIME THIS WEEKEND.

YOU'RE SO FULL OF IT.

YES, I AM.

AND SO ARE YOU.

YOU KNOW, IT'S TIME YOU STARTED ASKING YOURSELF

SOME SERIOUS QUESTIONS, DAWSON.

'CAUSE YOU EXHAUST WAY TOO MUCH TIME AND ENERGY

ON A GIRL YOU CALL YOUR FRIEND.

SO YOU KNOW WHAT?

LET'S JUST SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT HERE. WHO'S IT GONNA BE?

IS IT JEN, OR IS IT JOEY?

DO YOU LIKE THE BLONDE, OR DO YOU LIKE THE BRUNETTE?

THESE QUESTIONS ARE NOT GONNA GO AWAY, DAWSON.

IT'S TIME THAT YOU PROVIDE SOME ANSWERS.