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1
00:00:02,470 --> 00:00:04,172
Cheers is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:04,172 --> 00:00:06,340
Good morning.
3
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:07,541
Morning.
4
00:00:08,476 --> 00:00:10,411
What's
With the vegetables?
5
00:00:10,411 --> 00:00:12,313
Same as always.
They're watching tv.
6
00:00:13,814 --> 00:00:15,616
Sam, I have
Changed my diet.
7
00:00:15,616 --> 00:00:19,220
I'm finally eating right for
The first time in 30 years.
8
00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:21,555
30? What
Were you doing
The other 12?
9
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,394
And I feel so good that
I thought we'd all
Work on our diets,
10
00:00:26,394 --> 00:00:28,396
So I'm making up this
Little vegetable plate.
11
00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:30,431
I figure if
Those guys are going
To sit around and eat,
12
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:32,533
They might as well
Eat something healthy.
13
00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:33,801
I don't think
They're gonna like that.
14
00:00:33,801 --> 00:00:35,203
They'll never
Even notice.
15
00:00:43,311 --> 00:00:45,879
What the hell
Is this?
16
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,047
What's what?
17
00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:49,550
This thing I found
In the pretzel bowl.
18
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,552
Oh, my god.
What are these?
19
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:53,654
They appear to be
Orange and green sticks.
20
00:00:54,722 --> 00:00:56,224
I know what they are.
21
00:00:56,224 --> 00:00:57,525
You know when you go
In a restaurant
22
00:00:57,525 --> 00:00:59,527
And you order a nice
Thick juicy steak,
23
00:00:59,527 --> 00:01:01,862
And they put this other stuff
On the plate that
You shove aside?
24
00:01:01,862 --> 00:01:03,464
Oh. You mean vegetables.
25
00:01:03,464 --> 00:01:05,699
These
Can't be vegetables.
There's no batter.
26
00:01:05,699 --> 00:01:08,402
You guys, you're not
Even giving me a chance.
27
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,704
You sit around
Stuffing your faces
All day long,
28
00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:14,074
So why don't you
Stuff them with something
That's good for you?
29
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,543
Go ahead. Try it.
30
00:01:21,682 --> 00:01:22,916
Eh, it's not bad.
31
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:25,219
The cauliflower
Acts like a ladle.
32
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:35,363
* makin' your way
In the world today *
33
00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:38,566
* takes everything
You've got *
34
00:01:38,566 --> 00:01:40,934
* takin' a break
From all your worries *
35
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,337
* sure would help
A lot *
36
00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:48,108
* wouldn't you like
To get away *
37
00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:52,446
* sometimes
You want to go *
38
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:55,849
* where everybody
Knows your name *
39
00:01:57,651 --> 00:02:01,189
* and they're always
Glad you came *
40
00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,792
* you want to be
Where you can see *
41
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:07,261
* our troubles
Are all the same *
42
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:08,596
* you want to be *
43
00:02:08,596 --> 00:02:11,565
* where everybody
Knows your name *
44
00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:15,336
* you want to go
Where people know *
45
00:02:15,336 --> 00:02:17,805
* people are all the same *
46
00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,173
* you want to go *
47
00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:22,543
* where everybody
Knows your name **
48
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:45,065
Whoa, sammy.
49
00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:47,167
I see her.
50
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,636
How do you do that?
51
00:02:48,636 --> 00:02:52,172
I could tell you, but then
I'd have to kill you.
52
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,774
Excuse me, excuse me.
53
00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:55,476
Come over here
For a second, will you?
54
00:02:55,476 --> 00:02:57,645
I want to pour you
A glass of champagne.
55
00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:59,179
Interesting thing
About this bottle--
56
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,648
It was presented to me
57
00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:04,151
For being the hottest
Single guy in boston.
58
00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:06,086
But until you walked
Through that door,
59
00:03:06,086 --> 00:03:09,122
I've never found anyone
I wanted to share it with.
60
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:12,260
I don't drink
Champagne. Thanks.
61
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:16,997
Whew! What just
Happened here, guys?
62
00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,165
Well, you got
Shot down, sam.
63
00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:20,501
You read about those
Kind of things,
64
00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:22,202
But you never think they're
Going to happen to you.
65
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:23,504
It's amazing.
66
00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:25,439
Maybe she's seeing
Someone else.
67
00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,975
I don't see
How that's relevant.
68
00:03:27,975 --> 00:03:29,310
You know, sammy,
69
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:31,111
Maybe she's
One of these women
70
00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:33,547
Who coaches basketball
And does her own
Carpentry,
71
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:34,915
If you know
What I mean.
72
00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:36,717
Let's go with that,
Shall we, gentlemen?
73
00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:39,587
Afternoon, all.
74
00:03:39,587 --> 00:03:41,789
Hey, how's it going,
Dr. Crane?
75
00:03:41,789 --> 00:03:42,823
Oh, the usual--
76
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:44,592
The crying, the tantrums,
The bed-wetting.
77
00:03:44,592 --> 00:03:46,427
Yeah.
That's fatherhood.
78
00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:48,329
No. That's
My therapy group.
79
00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:51,899
What a bunch of losers.
80
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,568
I'm sorry.
I'm a bit stressed today.
81
00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:56,570
Lilith and I
Have been looking
82
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,205
For a preschool
For frederick.
83
00:03:58,205 --> 00:03:59,407
Tomorrow
We've got an interview
84
00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:00,741
With the administrators
85
00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,877
Of the magic hours
Learning center.
86
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:05,212
I don't get that.
87
00:04:05,212 --> 00:04:07,214
This is your kid,
Your money.
88
00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:09,783
Why aren't you
Interviewing them?
89
00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:11,619
The beauty
Of private education
90
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:12,786
Is that they're able
91
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:14,788
To weed out
The unacceptable lowlifes.
92
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:17,525
I just pray
I'm not one of them.
93
00:04:17,525 --> 00:04:20,528
Wait, wait, wait,
Wait a second here.
94
00:04:20,528 --> 00:04:22,696
What's the matter
With public school?
95
00:04:22,696 --> 00:04:24,932
I went
To public school.
96
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:31,372
I love you, cliff.
Don't ever change.
97
00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:35,476
Until I began
Eating clean,
98
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:36,810
I never realized
99
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:41,014
How good a nice,
Dry rice cake
Could taste.
100
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,816
How can you eat those?
101
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:44,585
They don't have
Any flavor.
102
00:04:44,585 --> 00:04:46,987
If I eat these,
I will live longer.
103
00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:48,589
I have a question.
104
00:04:48,589 --> 00:04:50,491
You're always talking about
How you hate your life.
105
00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:52,493
How come you want
To make it longer?
106
00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:53,627
Shut up, woody.
107
00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:58,832
Hello, frasier.
108
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:01,469
Darling.
109
00:05:01,469 --> 00:05:03,937
What's wrong?
You look so somber?
110
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,173
How can you tell?
111
00:05:06,173 --> 00:05:07,875
I took a shot
And got lucky.
112
00:05:10,778 --> 00:05:14,448
Frasier, I have
Some bad news.
113
00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:18,185
This morning at 9:00,
114
00:05:18,185 --> 00:05:20,454
Whitey passed away.
115
00:05:20,454 --> 00:05:22,990
Oh, lilith.
I'm so sorry.
116
00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:26,427
Just yesterday, he was
So young, so vital.
117
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:28,028
This morning,
I walked into the lab
118
00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:29,430
And found him face-down
119
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:32,265
In his nest
Of cedar shavings.
120
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:33,967
Excuse me?
121
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,268
You see,
122
00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:38,138
Whitey was lilith's senior
And most-cherished lab rat.
123
00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:41,308
Oh, for crying
Out loud.
124
00:05:41,308 --> 00:05:43,444
No. You don't understand.
125
00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:45,479
Usually we don't
Get attached to the rats,
126
00:05:45,479 --> 00:05:47,481
But this one
Was so special.
127
00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:49,417
We even named him.
128
00:05:49,417 --> 00:05:51,552
Everyone in the lab
Called him whitey.
129
00:05:51,552 --> 00:05:54,087
You sure they weren't
Talking to you?
130
00:05:56,657 --> 00:05:59,960
No, carla. They were
Talking about whitey
The rat.
131
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,128
Ok. I'll ask again--
132
00:06:01,128 --> 00:06:03,564
Are you sure they weren't
Talking to you?
133
00:06:04,432 --> 00:06:05,833
Carla, please.
134
00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:08,168
Lilith is mourning
The loss of a close friend.
135
00:06:08,168 --> 00:06:09,537
Big deal.
Go find another rat
136
00:06:09,537 --> 00:06:11,505
To hook up
To your electrodes.
137
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:15,509
My research never
Harmed whitey in any way.
138
00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:18,512
In fact, he had everything
A rat could want.
139
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:21,882
If he needed it,
I gave it to him.
140
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:24,317
That rat was
The envy of others.
141
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:26,587
That's true,
But I got over it.
142
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:31,459
I miss him so much.
143
00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:37,130
Let it out,
Darling.
144
00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:38,466
I am.
145
00:06:42,436 --> 00:06:45,038
Here she comes.
146
00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:47,140
I'm psyched this time.
I'm psyched.
147
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:51,078
Hi. Listen, excuse me
For just a second.
148
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:52,345
I didn't mean to imply
149
00:06:52,345 --> 00:06:54,014
That I was gonna
Give you champagne
To get you drunk.
150
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:56,517
I just wanted
To get to know you.
151
00:06:56,517 --> 00:06:59,152
You'd have to get me
Drunk for that.
152
00:07:02,523 --> 00:07:05,993
First that other girl.
Now her twin sister.
153
00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:08,529
I don't know
What she's looking
For in life,
154
00:07:08,529 --> 00:07:10,998
But if she can't
Find it here,
155
00:07:10,998 --> 00:07:12,933
She's not gonna find it
Anywhere.
156
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,167
Paul. You ready?
157
00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:15,536
Yeah. Let's go.
158
00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:19,106
Paul?
159
00:07:20,741 --> 00:07:22,175
See you later, guys.
160
00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:23,544
Don't wait up.
161
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,450
This isn't really happening.
No, no.
162
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:31,785
In a few seconds,
163
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,187
I'm gonna wake up
In my own bed,
164
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:35,589
Covered in sweat.
165
00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:41,795
Ok. Here we go.
166
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:44,231
Ooh, this is going
To be a long one.
167
00:07:48,268 --> 00:07:51,038
I feel great.
168
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:53,574
I've been eating clean
For 12 hours now.
169
00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:54,942
I feel like I have
A whole new body.
170
00:07:54,942 --> 00:07:56,810
I have more energy,
And I just feel better.
171
00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:58,812
I'm a celebration of life.
172
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:00,413
Boy, I'll say,
Rebecca,
173
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:05,318
And what goes better
With a celebration
Than ho-hos?
174
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:08,889
Well, no, I can't
Think of anything
Except maybe...
175
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:11,859
Twinkies.
176
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:14,327
Gentlemen,
I have one word for you--
177
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,529
Snowballs.
178
00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:17,931
Snowballs!
Snowballs!
179
00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:20,934
Snowballs are better
Because they're bite size.
180
00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:27,140
[garbled]
See what I mean?
181
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:30,177
Good evening, all.
182
00:08:31,879 --> 00:08:34,014
Sam, glenlivet,
Rocks. Two.
183
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,416
How you feeling there,
Lilith?
184
00:08:36,416 --> 00:08:38,285
Life goes on, sam.
185
00:08:38,285 --> 00:08:39,787
Ah, that's the spirit.
186
00:08:39,787 --> 00:08:41,689
Rather
Than brood and mourn,
187
00:08:41,689 --> 00:08:45,826
Frasier and I have decided
To do something a little bit
More life-affirming.
188
00:08:45,826 --> 00:08:49,529
We're going to a theater
And a late dinner.
189
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,832
I think
Whitey would approve.
190
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:54,067
Lilith, your clinic's
On the phone.
191
00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:55,535
I think there's
An emergency with
One of your patients.
192
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,938
You can use the phone
In my office.
193
00:08:57,938 --> 00:08:59,607
We've got an 8:00 curtain.
194
00:08:59,607 --> 00:09:01,441
Tell them to take
Two thorazine
195
00:09:01,441 --> 00:09:02,910
And call you
In the morning.
196
00:09:02,910 --> 00:09:05,679
That'll be $7.50,
Dr. Crane.
197
00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:08,081
Oh, yes, of course.
198
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:11,084
Oh, jeez, I've only
Got big bills.
199
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:13,286
Perhaps lilith
Has some change.
200
00:09:13,286 --> 00:09:14,688
Oh, dear god.
201
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,223
What? What is it?
202
00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:20,160
Lilith is carrying
A dead rat in her purse.
203
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,763
Oh, god.
204
00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:25,565
Why would she be carrying
A dead rat in her purse?
205
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,067
Just a wild guess--
206
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,068
A snack?
207
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:34,775
This is not healthy
At all.
208
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:36,910
My wife has gone
Completely around the bend.
209
00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,779
Perhaps I
Rushed her through
210
00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:40,781
The grieving process
Too quickly.
211
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,650
Oh, the poor woman.
212
00:09:42,650 --> 00:09:44,885
I dare you to look
In the purse.
213
00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:48,321
Heh. Dare me?
Dare you.
214
00:09:49,657 --> 00:09:52,025
Obviously, I've got
To dispose of whitey
215
00:09:52,025 --> 00:09:53,460
And break
This fixation,
216
00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:55,595
Then deal with
The repercussions
As they occur.
217
00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:59,667
Eeww!
Arrgh!
218
00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:01,034
Yeah, I looked first.
219
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,236
I bet
You won't kiss him.
220
00:10:03,236 --> 00:10:04,638
You two are sick!
221
00:10:04,638 --> 00:10:08,208
Oh, yeah, we've
Got a big problem.
222
00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,210
Obviously, lilith
Is having trouble
223
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:12,545
Breaking this attachment
On her own.
224
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:14,014
I've got to be the man
225
00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:15,649
And handle this
In a mature fashion.
226
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:21,188
Ew ew ew!
227
00:10:21,188 --> 00:10:22,455
Ew, god, ew!
228
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,857
Jeez.
229
00:10:24,725 --> 00:10:25,926
Is everything all right?
230
00:10:25,926 --> 00:10:27,828
Yes. It was
A false alarm.
231
00:10:27,828 --> 00:10:29,162
So, nothing was wrong?
232
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:32,833
No. One of my patients
Set off a false alarm,
233
00:10:32,833 --> 00:10:34,467
But he's a pyromaniac,
234
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,004
So for him,
This is progress.
235
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:38,605
Oh, lilith, darling,
Hello.
236
00:10:38,605 --> 00:10:39,840
I've got your purse.
237
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,709
We don't have time
For drinks really.
238
00:10:41,709 --> 00:10:43,010
Curtain's in 45 minutes.
239
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,512
You know
I hate to be late.
240
00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:48,048
Yes, it's one of your
More endearing compulsions.
241
00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:51,719
By the way,
There's something
We need to discuss.
242
00:10:51,719 --> 00:10:54,221
[speaking
In hushed tone]
243
00:10:54,221 --> 00:10:55,723
You did what?!
244
00:10:55,723 --> 00:10:58,025
Darling, I did
What I had to do.
245
00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,893
Shut up.
Where is he?
246
00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:01,261
[trash cans
Clattering]
247
00:11:09,703 --> 00:11:13,073
Apparently,
She's still grieving.
248
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:29,189
Well, 26 hours
Of eating clean.
249
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:32,325
And 26 hours
Of hearing about it.
250
00:11:35,395 --> 00:11:36,930
Oh, good morning there.
251
00:11:36,930 --> 00:11:38,732
Did you sleep ok?
252
00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:41,735
Not too well, sam.
253
00:11:41,735 --> 00:11:43,804
I'd have thought that
That couch,
254
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:47,174
After all the acrobatics
You've done on it,
255
00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:48,976
Would have
A little more give.
256
00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:53,246
I appreciate
Your hospitality.
257
00:11:53,246 --> 00:11:54,915
Any time.
258
00:11:54,915 --> 00:11:57,184
I guess I ought
To freshen up, huh?
259
00:11:57,184 --> 00:11:59,519
This is what
It's come to--
260
00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:01,088
Bedding down in a bar,
261
00:12:01,088 --> 00:12:04,291
Wearing the same clothes
For two days in a row.
262
00:12:04,291 --> 00:12:06,493
The trick, fras,
Is to take your
Sport coat off like that
263
00:12:06,493 --> 00:12:10,063
And stand directly under
The air conditioning
Duct for 10 minutes.
264
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:11,331
Take it from me.
If you do that,
265
00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:14,534
You can go another
Couple days easy.
266
00:12:14,534 --> 00:12:17,204
Are you saying
That you sometimes
267
00:12:17,204 --> 00:12:19,773
Go for days at a time
In the same clothes?
268
00:12:19,773 --> 00:12:22,442
You get a look
That works for you,
269
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,011
You stick with it.
270
00:12:27,881 --> 00:12:29,850
Oh, paul.
271
00:12:32,552 --> 00:12:35,555
Why is she laughing?
272
00:12:35,555 --> 00:12:37,324
Paul's not funny.
273
00:12:39,326 --> 00:12:41,328
Does anyone know
What paul does
For a living?
274
00:12:41,328 --> 00:12:42,996
After all, women are
Attracted to power.
275
00:12:42,996 --> 00:12:45,332
I think
He's a toll-booth
Attendant.
276
00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:49,102
Yeah, well, that would
Explain the quarter tips.
277
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:52,539
I think I know
What it is.
278
00:12:52,539 --> 00:12:55,342
Paul's a real nice guy
And a good listener.
279
00:12:55,342 --> 00:12:57,010
He probably
Shows genuine interest
280
00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:59,679
In who she is
As a person.
281
00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:01,148
Probably treats her
With respect.
282
00:13:01,148 --> 00:13:05,118
If that's the case,
He's welcome to her.
283
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:08,055
Well, is there
Anything here
284
00:13:08,055 --> 00:13:09,756
I can have
For breakfast?
285
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:11,091
If you'd like something
286
00:13:11,091 --> 00:13:12,759
That's tasty
And nutritious,
287
00:13:12,759 --> 00:13:15,628
You could spread
Some of this bean curd
288
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:18,531
On these fiber-rich
Bran crackers.
289
00:13:18,531 --> 00:13:20,667
I won't eat
That crap.
290
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:23,603
Fraser, you're a doctor.
You should believe in
Health and nutrition.
291
00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:24,938
Doesn't mean
I have to listen
292
00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:27,240
To some tree-hugging,
Dirt-munching druid.
293
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:31,945
I'm sorry. I'm not exactly
294
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,914
What you'd call
A morning person.
295
00:13:33,914 --> 00:13:36,850
Dr. Crane,
Your wife called.
I didn't want to wake you.
296
00:13:36,850 --> 00:13:39,519
Oh, she called
To apologize?
297
00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:41,488
Well, sort of.
298
00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:43,490
She said for you to meet her
At frederick's school.
You have that interview.
299
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:45,492
Oh, I
Completely forgot.
300
00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,527
She also said to tell you
She knew you'd forget
301
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:49,496
Because you're such
An uncaring human being.
302
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:52,365
But for once in your life,
Think of your child.
303
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:54,034
Comb your few
Remaining hairs,
304
00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:55,869
And wash that canned ham
You call a face,
305
00:13:55,869 --> 00:13:59,706
And get over there.
306
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:01,942
Hey, now that
I reread this,
307
00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:05,545
It sounds less and less
Like an apology.
308
00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:10,517
Sammy, how about
A couple of coffees
For me and paula.
309
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,185
Paul and paula.
310
00:14:12,185 --> 00:14:13,720
Yeah.
311
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,222
Hey, paul.
312
00:14:15,222 --> 00:14:16,924
What?
313
00:14:16,924 --> 00:14:19,592
No, the song--
Hey, paul.
314
00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:21,561
Hey, what?
315
00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:22,662
No. Wait a minute.
316
00:14:22,662 --> 00:14:24,431
You never heard
That old song
317
00:14:24,431 --> 00:14:26,066
Hey, hey, paul?
318
00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:29,002
Hey, hey. Shut up.
319
00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:30,470
No. No, come on,
320
00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:32,172
We're talking
About that song
From the sixties
321
00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:33,673
By paul and paula--
322
00:14:33,673 --> 00:14:34,841
Hey, hey, paula.
323
00:14:34,841 --> 00:14:35,842
What?
324
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,777
Nothing. Never mind.
325
00:14:37,777 --> 00:14:40,413
Forget I brought it up.
326
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:42,315
This has been
Driving me crazy.
327
00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:44,317
I got to know
Something.
328
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:45,585
What, sam?
329
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:47,487
I'll try to put this
As delicately as I can
330
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,089
Because you're my friend,
And I like you.
331
00:14:49,089 --> 00:14:51,258
I don't want
To insult you,
332
00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:53,593
But why would any girl
Be caught dead with you
333
00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:55,395
When she
Could be with me?
334
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:59,566
You thought that
Would offend me.
335
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:00,934
I'm serious.
336
00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:02,469
What did you do,
337
00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,337
Slip her a mickey
Or something?
338
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:07,340
Well, since you
Asked me so nicely,
I'll tell you.
339
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:11,544
Paula's what
We like to refer to
As a chubby chaser.
340
00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:14,214
You're kidding.
341
00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:15,682
You mean
She likes to go out
342
00:15:15,682 --> 00:15:17,417
With guys who are--
343
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,052
Who are, uh...
344
00:15:19,052 --> 00:15:21,521
Portly, sam.
The word is portly.
345
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:25,458
Did you hear that?
346
00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:27,995
She only goes out
With guys who are heavy.
347
00:15:27,995 --> 00:15:29,896
Oh, you'd
Be surprised, sam.
348
00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:31,798
Women like
The oddest things.
349
00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:33,066
Take me.
350
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:34,401
Yeah?
What do you like?
351
00:15:34,401 --> 00:15:36,003
Nothing.
352
00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:37,504
Just take me.
353
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:45,912
This is driving me crazy.
I gotta find--
354
00:15:45,912 --> 00:15:47,547
Excuse me. Listen, ahem,
355
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,349
Apparently
You've been, you know,
Shooting me down here
356
00:15:49,349 --> 00:15:52,285
For the last couple of days
Because of the way I look.
357
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:53,620
So?
358
00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:55,255
I think it's unfair
That you're not willing
359
00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:56,723
To get to know
The real me.
360
00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:58,758
I think if you did
We could be really
Good friends.
361
00:15:58,758 --> 00:16:00,593
You want
To be friends?
362
00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:01,894
Yeah, I do.
363
00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:04,531
Ok, well, maybe
We could start
364
00:16:04,531 --> 00:16:06,966
By you introducing
Me to some
Of your friends,
365
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:11,971
Especially that
Large and lovely one
Right over there.
366
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:25,285
You mean norm?
367
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:26,286
Yeah.
368
00:16:26,286 --> 00:16:28,388
He's a suitful,
Isn't he?
369
00:16:35,062 --> 00:16:36,529
Oh, thank god.
370
00:16:36,529 --> 00:16:38,298
I didn't miss
The interview, did I?
371
00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:40,500
Yes, you did. I've
Already had it.
372
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,870
They're outside
Conferring
About us now.
373
00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:46,406
What did you
Tell them about me?
374
00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:48,875
I described you
In terms which were
Positively glowing,
375
00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,744
Which is the way
I'd like to
See you in hell.
376
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:55,348
So just remember--
When they come
Back in
377
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,450
To pretend that
We love each other.
378
00:16:57,450 --> 00:16:59,852
After that,
I go right back
To loathing you.
379
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:02,222
I can't believe that you're
Willing to destroy our marriage
380
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:05,958
All because of your
Childish refusal to accept
The death of an animal.
381
00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:09,462
The very fact that you
Think of whitey
As an animal
382
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:12,732
Proves that
We are completely
Incompatible.
383
00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:15,135
But he was an animal!
384
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:16,903
What--what--what was he,
385
00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:18,471
A--a vegetable,
A mineral?
386
00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:21,774
Oh, I know.
He was the ceo
Of general motors.
387
00:17:23,510 --> 00:17:24,711
I hate you.
388
00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:26,213
I hate you.
389
00:17:26,213 --> 00:17:27,347
Hello.
Hello.
390
00:17:28,515 --> 00:17:31,584
This is my husband,
Dr. Frasier crane.
391
00:17:31,584 --> 00:17:33,019
He's very sorry he's late.
392
00:17:33,019 --> 00:17:35,155
He's always
So busy helping people.
393
00:17:35,155 --> 00:17:36,756
Pleased to meet you.
394
00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:38,425
Won't you sit down?
395
00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:40,993
We'd like
To thank you
For taking the time
396
00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,762
To come down here.
397
00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:45,998
It's good
To see parents
That care so much.
398
00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:48,468
You know,
A program like ours
399
00:17:48,468 --> 00:17:51,771
Requires as much
Of the parents
As the child.
400
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:54,040
We couldn't agree more.
Right, dear?
401
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:55,542
Oh, absolutely,
Dear.
402
00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:57,277
Unofficially, I think it's
A very good possibility
403
00:17:57,277 --> 00:18:00,180
That we'll be able
To welcome frederick
404
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:01,914
To the magic hours
Learning center.
405
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,117
Oh, that's
Wonderful news.
406
00:18:04,117 --> 00:18:05,385
We couldn't be happier.
407
00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:07,387
But before
You leave,
408
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:09,822
Would you
Like to see
Something precious?
409
00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:13,293
Our sylvia
Just had babies.
410
00:18:13,293 --> 00:18:15,528
Who's sylvia?
411
00:18:15,528 --> 00:18:18,198
The school's pet hamster.
412
00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:19,666
Ah.
Ohh...
413
00:18:23,236 --> 00:18:27,006
Oh, look at that
Little one in the corner.
414
00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:29,075
He looks just like whitey.
415
00:18:29,075 --> 00:18:30,277
Who's whitey?
416
00:18:30,277 --> 00:18:32,879
Oh, he was
My favorite dead rat
417
00:18:32,879 --> 00:18:36,616
That this bastard took
And threw in the trash!
418
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:40,753
Don't mind her.
She's just overemotional
419
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:42,389
And crazy as a loon!
420
00:18:42,389 --> 00:18:43,890
I supposed you'd like
421
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:46,025
To take one of these
And throw it
In the garbage, too.
422
00:18:46,025 --> 00:18:50,597
Why don't you just
Bite the heads off these
Birds while you're at it,
423
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:52,799
Dr. Death?
424
00:18:54,301 --> 00:18:55,935
I am not the one who
Goes walking around
425
00:18:55,935 --> 00:18:58,938
With a decomposing
Corpse of a rat
In my purse!
426
00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,740
You are a hateful man.
427
00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:04,311
And you are a troubled,
Disturbed woman!
428
00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:06,746
But a wonderful mother.
429
00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:13,420
Well, we'll
Get back to you.
430
00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:20,193
Well, sam,
I've done it.
431
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:24,731
Blighted my child's
Hopes of ever getting
An education.
432
00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:28,401
Probably ruined
My marriage as well.
433
00:19:28,401 --> 00:19:30,069
I think my life's over.
434
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:31,571
Yeah, well,
Life's tough.
435
00:19:31,571 --> 00:19:34,907
I just got
Shot down by a chick
Who likes fat guys.
436
00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:42,515
Oh, rebecca,
Do you have any more
Of those rice cakes?
437
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:43,783
Why?
438
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:46,553
You were right.
They're the
Perfect food.
439
00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:48,288
Yeah.
What's the gag?
440
00:19:48,288 --> 00:19:51,291
I'm telling you,
We've been enjoying
Them all day, right?
441
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:52,459
Really?
442
00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:53,793
That's neat.
443
00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:55,462
I'm glad I could make
You guys feel better.
444
00:19:55,462 --> 00:19:57,530
Yeah, I got a whole
New bag of them
Right down here.
445
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,131
Great.
446
00:19:59,131 --> 00:20:01,133
You guys are gonna feel
So much healthier when
You eat like this.
447
00:20:01,133 --> 00:20:02,669
I'm not kidding.
You'll have a lot more energy,
448
00:20:02,669 --> 00:20:04,170
Your bodies
Will feel lighter,
449
00:20:04,170 --> 00:20:05,605
Your reflexes
Will be sharper...
450
00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:07,940
Oh, our reflexes
Are already
Much sharper.
451
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,642
Carla, pull!
452
00:20:11,177 --> 00:20:12,812
Pull!
Pull!
453
00:20:17,183 --> 00:20:19,218
Frasier?
454
00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:25,325
Frasier,
I owe you an apology.
455
00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:27,660
I haven't been myself
The past couple of days.
456
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:31,130
No, darling.
I--I trivialized
Your grief.
457
00:20:31,130 --> 00:20:32,799
A husband should
Be supportive,
458
00:20:32,799 --> 00:20:34,166
But...
459
00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:36,436
Please, help me.
460
00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:39,005
Help me.
Meet me halfway.
461
00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:42,575
Why were you carrying
A moribund rodent
In your evening bag?
462
00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:46,413
I wasn't going to
Take him on our date,
463
00:20:46,413 --> 00:20:48,014
But I knew if left him
At the lab,
464
00:20:48,014 --> 00:20:50,650
They'd have given him
To the undergraduates
To dissect.
465
00:20:50,650 --> 00:20:52,619
I couldn't let that
Happen to whitey.
466
00:20:52,619 --> 00:20:54,921
I just wanted to give him
A decent burial.
467
00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:56,889
I'm--I'm so sorry.
468
00:20:56,889 --> 00:20:58,257
How could I have
Been so insensitive?
469
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:00,893
Of course,
I overreacted,
470
00:21:00,893 --> 00:21:03,129
But I think I know why.
471
00:21:03,129 --> 00:21:05,765
I was confronted
For the first time
472
00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:07,066
With the death
Of someone close to me.
473
00:21:07,066 --> 00:21:08,768
I understand, dear.
474
00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,537
That's what we call
A crisis.
475
00:21:10,537 --> 00:21:13,673
I know what we
Call it, frasier.
476
00:21:14,741 --> 00:21:16,242
The upshot is,
477
00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:18,578
I've never been more
Acutely aware
478
00:21:18,578 --> 00:21:19,579
Of how precious
And fragile
479
00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:21,381
Life is for each of us.
480
00:21:21,381 --> 00:21:23,282
Darling, I think
Everyone would agree
481
00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:25,785
That existence
Is tenuous at best.
482
00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:28,888
Therefore,
All we can do
Is embrace life,
483
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:32,091
And you and I,
We're so fortunate.
484
00:21:32,091 --> 00:21:34,093
We--we have a baby,
485
00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:35,562
The very symbol
Of life reborn.
486
00:21:35,562 --> 00:21:37,897
He's no longer a baby.
487
00:21:37,897 --> 00:21:39,899
He'll be going to school
In september.
488
00:21:39,899 --> 00:21:43,135
Yes--if we can
Successfully negotiate
A preschool interview
489
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:44,704
Without slipping
Into a scene
490
00:21:44,704 --> 00:21:46,606
From who's afraid
Of virginia woolf?.
491
00:21:46,606 --> 00:21:50,242
But, darling,
You're right.
492
00:21:50,242 --> 00:21:52,679
Frederick
Is getting older.
493
00:21:52,679 --> 00:21:54,246
You know, there is
A way we could...
494
00:21:54,246 --> 00:21:56,883
Renew ourselves
Yet again.
495
00:21:56,883 --> 00:21:59,218
How would we do that?
496
00:21:59,218 --> 00:22:01,821
We could have
Another child.
497
00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:04,524
We could,
Couldn't we?
498
00:22:04,524 --> 00:22:06,426
That's a wonderful idea.
499
00:22:06,426 --> 00:22:11,097
Oh, frasier, suddenly
I'm filled with a glow.
Let's start right now.
500
00:22:12,565 --> 00:22:14,867
It's all so strange.
501
00:22:14,867 --> 00:22:16,403
A seemingly
Insignificant creature
502
00:22:16,403 --> 00:22:19,205
Lives and dies...
503
00:22:19,205 --> 00:22:21,608
My marriage is threatened.
504
00:22:21,608 --> 00:22:24,444
My child's education
Is almost destroyed.
505
00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:25,978
Yet, somehow,
506
00:22:25,978 --> 00:22:27,079
Some way...
507
00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:30,683
I'm gettin'
Some action out of it.
36024
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