Original subtitles

"The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet," starring

the entire Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie...

Here's Harriet...

Here's David...

And here's Ricky.

Here they are, America's favorite family, the Nelsons.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Norma.

This is Rick.

Hey, I was looking for you at school today.

Oh, gee. I was there.

Well, I don't know.

The dean and I were looking all over for you.

I thought you might be ditching school.

I'll bet.

Well, the reason I wanted to talk to you

is I've got kind of a problem.

Well, I opened my wallet this morning

and found some money in it.

- Really? - Yeah.

And I was racking my brain all afternoon

trying to figure out what to do with it.

What did you decide?

Well, I decided to squander it on some beautiful girl

this Saturday night.

Gee.

Well, if by any remote possibility

you were talking about me I already have a date.

Oh.

Gee, that's too bad. - Yeah.

I'm sorry, too.

It was a very nice approach.

Oh, uh, I'm glad you like it.

What about Friday night?

Oh.

Well, we've got kind of a family thing going on Friday.

Oh.

Well, I must say I've had better nights.

I'm really sorry.

But I'll be at the library tomorrow evening

if you have nothing else to do.

Well, I may just drop by.

Good.

Maybe we can get a table in a quiet corner

and count all that money.

Sounds like fun.

I'll see you then.

Thanks for calling. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Get the date OK, Rick?

Well, kind of, if you call it that.

What do you mean?

Well, I can't quite figure this girl out.

I have a lot of fun talking to her,

but when it comes down to getting a real date

I can't seem to get anywhere.

Well, you just got a date with her, didn't you?

Well, yeah.

I'm meeting her at the library tomorrow night.

And we can't even talk.

Good luck.

Oh, hi, Joe.

Hi, Oz.

Close the door, will you?

What's the matter?

Clara's on her way over here, and there's

something I want to talk to you about before she gets here.

You have nothing to worry about.

I solemnly swear that you were with me at the bowling alley

until after 12 o'clock last night.

Oh, you know me, Oz.

I was home in bed.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I can't swear to that.

Listen to me, please.

Clara's liable to be here any minute.

OK. What's your problem?

Well, I just thought you might want

to have a little talk with Ricky and sort of put him

on his guard.

Well, on his guard against what?

What's this all about?

If you'll stop interrupting me and let me finish a sentence,

maybe you'll find out.

I'm not interrupting you.

You say something and stop, and I figure it's my turn.

Oh.

Well, she wants to arrange a date with Ricky.

Ricky and Clara?

You see what I mean?

There you go again.

What did I-- you say something ridiculous, and then you stop.

Well, only to catch my breath.

Where was I?

Have you been drinking?

No.

Do you want to hear this or don't you?

Well, of course I do, but get to the point.

Something about Ricky and Clara.

Yeah.

Well, anyway, Clara has this niece

who's coming down to visit us for a few days.

And you know how women are.

She wants to arrange a date between Ricky and the girl.

Her name's Shirley.

Maybe you remember her.

Uh, yeah.

It seems to me I do.

Yeah.

Last time I saw her she was about this high.

I think we've still got a couple of pictures of her wrestling

around on the lawn with Rick.

Well, of course, we're not allowing any of that this time.

Anyway, Clara's going to come over here and drop a few hints

about Rick's taking her out.

And I figured if I told you about it

you might kind of put Rick on his guard.

You know, so you'll have a fighting chance.

Yeah.

I-- I see what you mean.

Well, thanks a lot, Joe.

It's OK.

Of course, there's a possibility

he may want to take her out.

What does she look like now? Do you know?

I haven't the slightest idea.

But at least this way he won't be taken completely

by surprise.

Where's Harriet?

Oh, uh, she's right out in the kitchen I think.

Come on, I'll buy you some coffee.

Yeah. Sounds good.

You say Clara's coming over here?

Yeah. At least, that's what she said.

- Hi, Harriet. - Hi, Clara.

Come on in. - Uh-oh.

There she is.

Well, there you are.

I wondered where you disappeared to.

What are you doing over here?

I came to borrow some sugar.

Oh, well, that's nice.

How much do you want?

Oh, maybe a cup or so.

Oh. Well, here.

I've got an extra box.

Well, you sure you can spare it, Harriet?

- Sure. - Oh, thanks.

Come on, Joe. Let's go.

Wait a minute.

Aren't you going, er, um, have some coffee?

Yeah. How about it?

Oh. No thanks.

Not tonight, Harriet.

Come on, Joe.

Just a second.

Now, you sure you didn't come over

here to tell Harriet some news?

Oh.

What about?

Clara's niece is coming down to visit us for a few days.

Oh, isn't that nice?

Her name is Shirley.

I'll bet you remember her.

She was here once before a long time ago.

Yes. I think I do.

And?

And what?

What Clara's trying to say is she

thought it would be nice if Rick took

Shirley out while she was here. - Oh.

Well, I don't know what Ricky's got planned,

but we can certainly ask him. Come on.

I think he's upstairs in his room studying.

See?

What did I tell you?

Here we are.

Is that the right one? - Yes.

Thank you, dear.

There she is.

I thought we had a picture of her.

Oh, yeah. I remember her.

Naturally, she's grown up a bit since then.

- I guess we all have. - Yeah.

Take away the pigtails, a few freckles,

add a few pounds here and there.

Well, I'll take your word for it.

She's really very pretty now, Rick.

I'm sure she is.

Her mother says she's one of the most popular girls

on the campus.

Well, anyway, I thought you might all

come over for dinner tomorrow night and get acquainted.

- It's fine with me. - Hmm.

Sounds wonderful. - Oh, good.

Well, how about 7 o'clock?

You betcha. Sounds fine.

Well, we'll see you then.

Oh, and Oz, you will wear a coat, won't you?

We want to make a good impression on the kid.

Oh, sure.

Either that or a nice, clean sweatshirt.

Don't forget the sugar.

Oh, the sugar.

Oh, Harriet?

I guess I won't need the sugar after all.

- See ya, Oz. - Goodnight, Clara.

Goodnight, Joe.

See you tomorrow night.

I hope they didn't put you on too much of a spot, Rick.

Oh, that's OK.

I know they appreciate it.

Oh, it might be interesting to see her again.

Besides, the Randolphs are such nice people.

Hey, wait a second.

What about Norma?

Don't you have a date with her tomorrow night?

Well, that really wasn't much of a date.

I was just going to meet her at the library.

I'll get it all straightened out.

Gee, I wonder what Shirley does look like now?

Oh, hi, Rick.

Oh, hi, Norma.

- You know George, don't you? - Yeah.

Hi, George. - Hi, Rick.

I'll see you later, Norma.

OK.

Gee, I've got kind of a problem about tonight.

Oh? What's the matter?

Well, I won't be able to meet you at the library.

Oh? How come?

Well, I got kind of roped into having dinner

with some friends of the families.

Their niece is coming into town.

Niece?

Well, yeah.

As I say, it's one of those family things.

I hope you don't mind.

Oh, no.

Of course not.

- Say, how about tomorrow night? - Well, gee.

I don't know.

Why don't you check with me later?

Well, it might be kind of difficult

for me to call you later.

Well, I'll probably run into you on the campus

sometime tomorrow. - OK.

Well, I'll see you tomorrow then.

Yeah. Have a good time.

Oh, thanks.

Hi, Norma.

Oh, hi, Bob.

Can I buy you a malt or something?

You sure can.

I'll see you later, Rick.

Yeah, OK.

- Hi. - Hi, Clara.

- Hi, Oz. - Hello, Harriet.

Hi, Joe.

Hello, Ricky.

Well, hi, Joe.

Oh, Ricky, you're so handsome tonight.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, if I were only 10 years younger.

Heh-heh.

How many?

Oh, never mind.

- Hello, Mrs. Nelson. - Hello, Shirley.

I haven't seen you since you were a little girl.

Hi, Shirley. Nice to see you again.

- You remember Rick? - Hi.

Hi, Shirley. It's been a long time.

Sure has.

What happened to the braces on your teeth?

I was just going to ask you the same thing.

What about the freckles on your nose?

Oh, I still have those, but only in the summertime.

You really haven't changed so much, though.

Of course, you're a couple of feet taller and your hair

is darker.

Well, your hair's gotten a little lighter, hasn't it?

That's just this week.

Would you like some more coffee, Harriet?

- Yes, thank you. - I'll get it, Aunt Clara.

Oh, all right, dear.

She's a lovely girl, Clara.

Yes, isn't she, though?

Oh, she sure is.

Well, it's easy to see why she was selected homecoming queen.

Was she?

Of course she was.

Oh, Aunt Clara.

Well, you were, dear, and I think it's very nice.

She was picked out of over 500 students.

That's quite an honor.

Thank you.

But, Aunt Clara, half of them are boys.

Well, I don't care.

I think it's wonderful.

Thank you.

Honey, why don't you show Rick your scrapbook?

Did you bring it with you?

No, I didn't, Aunt Clara.

Mother has it.

Oh, that's a shame.

She wouldn't be traveling around with her scrapbook.

Well, I don't know why not.

Her picture was in all the papers up there.

Clara.

Well, it was.

Wait a minute.

Your mother sent me one of the clippings

from the school newspaper.

Now, where did I put that?

Oh, never mind, Aunt Clara.

Here it is.

Here, take a look at this.

Oh, yes.

Oh, you look beautiful.

Yes.

Very nice.

Who's the guy with you?

Oh, he's just a friend.

A boy I used to go out with occasionally.

And she's president of her sorority.

Clara, you're embarrassing her.

She's always doing that.

I am not.

Are you kidding?

Just like at the Johnson's last week.

Somebody happened to mention the Rose Bowl game,

and Clara had to tell everybody about that touchdown I

made in high school.

Well, I think when somebody runs 65 yards for a touchdown

it's worth talking about.

But when you keep talking about it all the time it

gets a little embarrassing.

Besides, it was 67 yards.

Well, shall we go in the other room?

- OK. - How about the dishes?

Oh, no.

I'll get those later.

Say, you kids don't have to stick around with us old folks.

Why don't you go to the movies?

Oh. Well, yeah.

That sounds good to me. How about you?

Yeah.

I'd love to.

Well, thanks for the dinner, Mrs. Randolph.

I really enjoyed it. - That's OK, Rick.

We loved having you.

Well, see you later. Bye.

- Have fun. - Bye.

- Bye. - I'll get my coat.

They seemed to hit it off pretty well, didn't they?

Yes, they did.

She's a very attractive girl.

We figured it was just about all over.

What's this?

Well, it was the last quarter, and it

was about a minute and a half to go with third and seven.

The ball was in our own territory.

Naturally, they were expecting a pass,

but I took off around right end and reversed my field and cut

back.

I was lucky enough to pick up a couple of good blocks

at the 50-yard line.

And from there on it was clear sailing.

Oh.

That's very interesting.

Gee, I hope Rick didn't feel like he

was trapped this evening.

He didn't seem to.

Besides, I think Shirley's a very attractive girl,

don't you? - Oh, well, yeah.

But, you know, Clara seems to be pushing things a little bit.

Oh, that's only natural.

After all, we're all good friends.

- Is that you, Rick? - Oh, yeah.

Hi. - Oh, hi.

Hi, dear. How was the date?

Oh, fine.

She seems like a real nice girl.

Yeah, she sure is.

- You have a good time? - Oh, yeah.

Very nice. Thanks.

That's good.

In fact, I've got a date with her tomorrow night.

- Oh, really. - Yeah.

We're going to a play.

Oh.

Well, that's fine if you're sure you want to.

Oh, yeah.

I thought you had a date with Norma for tomorrow night.

Well, I did, but I guess I'll have to break it again.

Oh, Rick?

Why didn't you just make the date

with Shirley for the following night

as long as you had a date?

Well, the tickets are for tomorrow night.

Oh.

Did you buy the tickets tonight?

Well, no, Mr. Randolph gave them to me

when I brought Shirley home.

Mr. Randolph?

Well, that's not fair.

Well, don't worry about it, Pop.

It's OK. - Well, I know.

But, I mean, don't feel you have to take her out now

if you don't want to.

I mean, just because the Randolphs

are good friends of ours. - Oh, no.

It's OK, Pop.

Well, maybe you can get a date with Norma

for the following night. - Well, yeah.

Maybe. Well, good night, Mom.

Good night, dear.

Good night, Pop.

Good night, Rick.

- Norma? - Oh.

Hi, Rick. - Hi.

Can I talk to you for a minute? - Sure.

If it's about tonight, it's OK.

What time do you want to pick me up?

Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.

I'm afraid I can't make it again.

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

I'm sorry.

Well, that's OK.

Maybe some other time.

Well, it's just one of those things.

I'm kind of obligated to help out

these friends of the family.

The ones with the niece?

Uh, yeah.

Well, have fun.

Well, I don't know about that.

I'll see you later. - OK.

Goodbye. - Bye.

- Hey, Rick? - Oh.

Hi, Charlie. - You've been holding out on me?

What do you mean?

Who was that cute girl I saw you with at the movies

last night?

Oh.

Well, that was a friend of the family's.

She sure was cute.

Well, hi. Come on in.

Hi, Harriet.

- Well, hi, Clara, Joe. - Hi, Oz.

Hi, Oz.

I came to return the sugar I borrowed.

But you didn't take any with you, remember?

That's why we didn't bring any back.

We just wanted an excuse to come over and talk to you.

Oh, good. Come on in and sit down.

The kids get away OK?

Oh, yes, Harriet, and you should have seen them.

They make the most beautiful couple.

Sit down, Joe.

Thanks.

Did Rick have a good time last night?

He seemed to.

Well, Shirley certainly did.

I think she's pretty sold on Rick.

You know what she did the first thing this morning?

She phoned her girlfriend back home

and told her all about the date.

You mean she called long distance?

Of course.

On our phone?

Well, naturally.

And she told her how much fun they had last night,

and that they're going to the play tonight,

and what a nice boy Ricky is.

They must have talked for about an hour.

Long distance?

Oh, Joe.

Where is your romance?

Well, I'm glad they're getting along so well.

Oh, so am I. Whoever thought we'd end up being in-laws?

Now, Clara, we wouldn't be in-laws.

She's only our niece.

Well, we'd be honorary in-laws.

Don't you think you might possibly be

rushing things just a little? - Yeah.

They've only been out together a couple of times,

including tonight.

Well, yes, but we've known each other for years.

I don't know what that proves, but it must prove something.

Well, I just have a feeling about this.

You mark my words.

Those kids are just meant for each other.

Shirley Nelson.

Doesn't that sound nice?

Well, yeah, but after all, these things take time.

Well, yes.

But wouldn't it be wonderful?

It sure would.

Well, if you'll excuse me, I think

I'll go out in the kitchen get a bite to eat.

Now, wait a second.

Aren't you even going to wait for an invitation?

What for, Oz?

We're practically in the family.

It would be nice, wouldn't it?

What's that?

If Shirley and Rick get married.

For gosh sakes, Harriet.

You're as bad as Clara.

Well, you must admit it would be nice.

The Randolphs are such good friends.

Hi.

Oh, hi, Rick.

Oh, good morning.

Want some orange juice?

Yeah, please.

- How was the play last night? - Oh, pretty good.

- Did you have a good time? - Yeah.

When is Shirley going back home?

Oh, in a couple of days, I guess.

I hate to sound nosy, but do you think you'll see her again?

Well, yeah.

I'm going to take her out again tonight.

Oh, good.

Uncle Joe spring for some more tickets?

Who?

Uncle Joe Randolph?

Oh, no.

I'm going to take her to dinner.

She wants to go to The Buccaneer Room.

Oh, that reminds me.

I promised to call her this morning.

Pardon me.

It's kind of serious.

You know, it might be nice at that.

It would, wouldn't it?

Yeah.

I thought we were going to have bacon and eggs this morning.

Well, we were, but Joe ate them all up last night.

Oh.

I don't think I want him in the family, after all.

Oh, Mom?

Do you have a clean white shirt there?

Yes, dear.

There are a couple in here.

Oh, and I sent your gray suit out to be pressed.

It will be back in about a half an hour.

Oh, thanks.

Have you heard anything about this Buccaneer Room?

Yes.

I've heard the food's very good there.

Of course, the prices are pretty good, too.

That's what I was afraid of.

Oh, hi, Rick.

- Oh, hi, Pop. - Oh.

Pop?

Could I borrow $10?

I kind of thought I made a wrong turn at the door there.

It seems to me I played this scene before.

Uh, Harriet?

So have I.

Good night, Mom.

Oh, good night, dear.

- Good night, Pop. - Good night, Rick.

Have a good time.

OK.

- He looks nice, doesn't he? - Yeah.

He sure does. - Hi.

- Well, hi, Dave. - Hi, Dave.

Where's Rick?

- He just left. - Oh, great.

Well, he called me this afternoon,

said he wanted to borrow these shoes for tonight.

Oh.

Well, he had a pair of shoes on when he left here.

I'm going out tomorrow night.

Maybe I can wear them.

Go ahead, Pop.

They're probably yours, anyway.

You know something?

I think you're right.

I understand Rick's going to the Buccaneer Room

with Mrs. Randolph's niece.

Yeah.

It looks as if that might be developing

into something pretty serious.

Well, I think you're wrong, Pop.

Well, why do you say that?

Well, in the first place, when I talked to Rick

this afternoon, he seemed pretty concerned

about having to break so many dates with Norma.

Well, then why is he taking Shirley

to the Buccaneer Room tonight?

I don't know.

But you know how easy it is for Rick

to get involved in those things.

Well, yeah, but I'm afraid you might have misunderstood, Dave.

I think it's kind of serious this time.

I think your dad's right.

You know how he hates to get dressed up,

and he went out of here with a coat and tie on.

You have to have a coat and tie on to get in there.

And he borrowed $10.

Well, you have to have at least that to get out of there.

Well, I guess I'll let you two worry about it.

Thanks for the cake. - Goodbye, dear.

Goodnight.

Are you interested in this?

No, I'm not.

You think we ought to go over and have a little talk

with Clara and Joe?

You mean about Rick and Shirley?

Well, yeah.

If what Dave says is true, we better

stop them before they start sending out

the wedding announcements.

Well, the whole thing is pretty confusing.

Dave could be wrong, you know. - Yeah.

And on the other hand, he could be right.

At least, I think we ought to talk to the Randolphs about it.

Well, don't you think it's kind of late just

to be dropping in on them?

Well, no.

We've got a perfectly good excuse.

We're going over to borrow a cup of sugar.

- Oz, Harriet! - Hi, Joe.

Come on in.

We were just talking about you guys.

As a matter of fact, I was going to call you.

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

I want you to settle an argument that Clara and I are having.

Oh, maybe we better come back later.

Oh, no. It's not that serious.

Come on in.

Harriet, what a wonderful surprise.

Hi, Clara.

Now, just a second.

Oz, tell Clara the bride's uncle does not

pay for the champagne at the wedding, right?

What a cheapskate.

My father bought five cases of champagne when we were married.

And drank it all himself.

I think we better get out of here.

No, we'll finish it later.

You come sit down.

You can count on one thing.

She'll pick it up right where we left off.

Of course, there's a good possibility

you may have nothing to argue about.

Well, what do you mean?

Well, when you hear what I have to say.

Oh, sit down, Oz.

Well, this will probably surprise you

as much as it did us, but Dave was talking to Rick

this afternoon, and he got the definite impression

that Rick and Shirley aren't serious about each other

at all.

Well, if they're not, somebody ought to tell Shirley about it.

The first thing she did after her date last night

was call her girlfriend again.

She told her what a good time she had,

and how wonderful Rick is, and how

he's taking her to the Buccaneer Room for dinner tonight.

And that's about all I could hear because Joe

was snoring so loud.

Wait a second, Clara.

Let's be sensible about this.

Just because Shirley was talking to her girlfriend on the phone

doesn't prove anything.

You know, Joe may be right, Clara.

Well, maybe we ought to ask them.

I think Rick's car is out there now.

I thought I heard somebody drive up.

Wonder what they're doing home so early.

Maybe they had a fight.

Well, if they did, they sure are making up.

I think she's got a point there.

Come away from there and stop spying on them.

It's not the first time a boy has kissed a girl, you know.

I'm not spying, I'm just looking.

I guess David must've misunderstood or something.

Clara, get away from that window.

Joe, you're blocking my view.

Maybe we see better if we turn out the lights.

Oh, I can see fine.

Is something going on out there?

Yeah.

Rick!

What are you doing here?

Aren't you out in the car?

No, I don't think so.

I'm right here.

Then who's the wolf out there in the car with my niece?

- Oh, that's Bill. - Bill?

Who's Bill?

Well, her boyfriend.

He came all the way down here just to see her.

Well, he must be the one in the newspaper clipping.

Yeah, that's right.

He's a real nice guy.

Oh.

Well, we kind of got the idea

that you and Shirley were getting

serious about each other. - Oh.

Oh, no.

She was fun to go out with, but somehow I

still keep thinking of her as having freckles and pigtails.

And you say she used to go steady with this Bill?

Well, yeah, but they had a little misunderstanding.

In fact, that was one of the reasons why she came down here.

And then when her girlfriend kept telling Bill all the fun

Shirley was having, he decided to come down

and find out about it.

Well, there was no trouble, was there?

Oh, no.

In fact, he picked up the dinner check.

As I say, he's a real nice guy.

And he sure is crazy about Shirley.

Well, the only thing, though, where does that leave you?

Well, back with Norma, which isn't bad, you know.

And you say this Bill picked up the check?

Yeah.

Oh, which reminds me.

Oh, don't worry, Pop.

That's why I came back here.

Here's the ten.

Oh.

There's really no hurry.

Says who?

You know, I still don't think it was very nice of Shirley.

What are you talking about?

Well, using Rick to make her boyfriend jealous.

Well, he seemed to go along with the idea.

Well, what else could he do?

I'll get it.

Hello?

Oh, really?

Well, I'm glad you did.

Yeah, I just got home.

Well, it's still early.

OK.

I'll pick you up in about 10 minutes.

OK.

Goodbye.

Well, that was a pleasant surprise.

- Who was it? - Norma.

- She called you? - Yeah.

She claims she dialed my number my mistake, but I doubt it.

But she's never called you before, has she?

No, but I think she's getting interested now

that I've called off a couple of dates.

You know how women are, Pop.

Well, I used to think I did, but now I'm not so sure.

Oh, that reminds me, could I--

Uh, Harriet.

No, no.

Let's do this right.

Here you are, son.

Thanks, Dad.

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