Original subtitles

"The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet," starring

the entire Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie.

Here's Harriet.

Here's David.

And here's Ricky.

Here they are, America's favorite family, the Nelsons.

Hi, Rick.

Hey, what's the idea starting without me?

Well, you were late. What kept you?

Well, I was waiting for Junior to get out of cooking class

so I could get my lunch. - You're kidding.

No.

She comes up with some pretty good stuff.

Last week I had breaded veal cutlets.

Couple of days ago, I had southern fried chicken

with blueberry muffins. - Hey, that sounds darn good.

What do you got today?

Oh, well, they're practicing for Christmas--

popcorn balls.

- Popcorn balls? - Yeah.

I just happened to have a couple of extra.

Would you care to trade for a ham sandwich?

Unfortunately, I don't have any more.

Well, OK, but you don't know what you're missing.

Hi, fellas.

Oh, hi, Harvey.

Well, if it isn't the local milkman.

I'll take a pound of butter, two quarts of milk,

and a dozen eggs.

Is this cash or charge?

How about a trade?

Have a popcorn ball.

No, thanks.

There is something you guys can do for me, though,

if you wouldn't mind. - Oh, like what?

Careful, Rick, it may be a trap.

Oh, I'm studying for my master's, you know,

and I've got four exams coming up.

And you want me to give you a little tutoring?

Hardly.

That'll be the day.

What I did have in mind, though,

is I'd kind of like to get somebody to take over my milk

route for a couple of days.

There isn't much to it.

I could tell you exactly what to do.

Well, it's not that.

You have to get up kind of early in the morning,

don't you? - At the crack of dawn.

It's not so bad if you go to bed early the night before.

I'd sure appreciate it.

Well, I don't know.

What do you think, Rick?

Well, what do we got to lose except a little sleep.

Gee, that's great, fellas. Thanks a lot.

I'm sure you won't have any trouble.

As a matter of fact, there aren't too many

people up at that hour.

The ones that are probably so grouchy they don't

want to talk to anybody anyway.

Well, I'll tell you this much, they won't be grouchy for long.

All you gotta do is give them a little personality

and a nice, big friendly smile, maybe a couple of jokes.

Actually, all you have to do is say, "Good morning,"

and set the milk down.

Well, that's probably why you have so many grouchy customers.

You got to wake them up a little,

give them a couple of laughs.

Hey, here's an idea.

Why don't you bring your guitar?

We could start off the day with a song.

You must be kidding.

No, we could be known as The Musical Milkmen. Oh,

smile, darn you, smile because--

Look, Wally.

Look, fellas, maybe I can get my wife

to take over the route for a couple of days.

Don't worry, Harv.

The only trouble we'll have with him

is keeping him out of the chocolate milk.

Surely hope so.

Look, I'm gonna be late for class.

You gonna be home later tonight? - Yeah.

Well, why don't I stop by, and I can give you all the details.

OK, that sound fine.

And don't worry about a thing, Harv.

Neither rain nor snow nor sleet nor gloom of night

shall stay these couriers from the swift completion

of their appointed rounds.

The milk must go through!

Don't worry, Harv.

It'll be all right.

And the last one is Mrs. Wilson.

After that, you're all through. Any questions?

Not as far as I'm concerned.

How big is that dog at the Walker's house?

Oh, he won't bother you.

They keep him chained up most of the time.

Chained?

Well, I mean on some kind of a leash or something.

Well, look, I better get back home,

start hitting the books again. I'll leave this with you, OK.

OK, thanks.

Oh, if any of the customers do happen

to be up, I always find it's best just to say,

"Good morning," and get out of there as fast as you can.

Otherwise, you're liable to get trapped

into fixing leaky faucets and changing tires

and all kinds of stuff. - OK.

Well, I'll see you early tomorrow morning, Rick.

Don't forget to set your clock. - Don't worry.

- Good night, Mr. Nelson. - Good night.

- Mrs. Nelson. - Good night.

Good night.

Thanks a lot for the cookie.

OK.

Gee, it's liable to be a little more complicated

than I thought.

Oh, I wouldn't worry about it if I were you.

You'll do fine.

Well, I'll do the best I can.

I hope I get up in time.

Well, you going to get to bed early aren't you?

Well, yeah, as soon as I finish my homework.

Oh, by the way, is it OK if I have a few friends come

over Friday night? - Sure.

I'll make some sandwiches, if you'd like.

Yeah, that'd be fine. Thanks a lot.

Oh, say, do you want me to get up and fix

you breakfast in the morning? - Oh, no, thanks.

Don't worry about it, mom. It'll be too early.

Oh, I don't mind, really.

What time are you getting up?

Well, 5:00.

Oh.

Well, I'll tell you what.

I'll have it ready for you as soon as you get home.

Hey, does this say two or three dozen eggs?

I can't quite get it into focus.

I might as well leave three.

Milk man, where have you been?

You're 10 minutes late. - Oh, I'm sorry.

Well, my fuse blew out an hour ago,

and I've been waiting here for you to replace it.

Oh, well, sure.

Now, the fuse box is just around the back of the house.

Oh, I think I can find it.

And don't put any pennies in it.

OK.

Oh, hi.

Oh, good morning. I was just delivering the milk.

Well, I was just going to leave a note for you.

My aunt wants a dozen eggs this morning.

OK, I'll go get them.

Oh, I forgot. I've got some right here.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

How about some orange juice?

No, thanks.

I don't think so.

Cottage cheese?

No thanks.

Well, goodbye.

Bye.

Hey!

Hey, Rick, come back.

Wait for me.

Oh, hi, pop.

Oh, hi, Rick.

How'd it go this morning? - Oh, fine.

Thanks.

Managed to stay awake OK?

Yeah, in fact, it was a lot of fun.

Oh, that's good.

Oh, he's just saying that 'cause he met a real cute girl.

That sounds interesting.

How was your day?

Oh, not too good.

I didn't meet any cute girls...

Until just now.

Well, just for that I'll hang your coat up.

Thank you.

Where'd you meet this girl, Rick?

Was she one of the customers?

Yeah, she came to the door at one of the houses

where I was delivering milk.

He can't really say he met her.

He didn't even get her name. - Oh, hi, Dave.

What are you doing here?

Oh, I just dropped by to say hello and steal a couple

of steaks out of the freezer.

Well, good for you.

How come you didn't get her name and ask her for a date?

You must be slipping.

Well, I don't think there's much you can do about it.

There must be company rules about things like that.

You mean he can't ever ask her out?

Well, I suppose I could if I met her someplace else.

Well, then there's your answer.

Make a date to meet her someplace else

and then you can ask her for a date.

Don't you have a wife to go home to or something?

I was just making a suggestion.

Well, she's a very attractive girl,

and I hope I meet her again sometime.

But I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

I'll get it, pop.

Hi, Harv. - Hi, Rick.

- Come on in. - Thanks.

- Oh, hi, Harv. - Hi, Mr. Nelson.

- Hi, Harv. - Hi, Dave.

- Come in and sit down. - Oh, thanks.

I can only stay for a minute.

I was just wondering, how'd everything go this morning?

Oh, great. I mean, there were no problems.

Oh, good. I'm glad to hear it.

Hey, well, look, I was thinking.

You guys have probably got a lot of things you'd rather

be doing, and I'm pretty well caught up in my studies,

I think I can take it tomorrow. - Oh, well, no.

We said we'd do it and we'll do it.

Well, I appreciate it, but really I can take it.

I've got all my Christmas cards in delivery and everything.

We can do that, too.

Don't worry about it.

Are you sure?

Look, you just concentrate on your studies.

That's what's important.

Well, gee, it's awful nice of you, Rick.

Oh, that's OK. Glad to do it.

Well, I'll drop the Christmas cards off later then.

Thanks again. - That's OK.

- Good night, Mr. Nelson. - Good night.

- Dave. - Good night, Harv.

- See you later, Harvey. - OK.

Well, it's like Rick says, it's just another girl.

He's not going to lose any sleep over her.

Oh, no, of course not.

Well, look, why don't you both go back to your wives

and let a poor bachelor work this out for himself?

Remember now, we haven't got all day.

Aww, you're just jealous.

She probably won't be up yet anyway.

She was this time yesterday.

Hey, don't forget the Christmas card.

Oh, yeah.

Well, come back here!

Now what?

You're forgetting the first rule of every milkman:

deliver the milk.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, good morning.

Good morning.

You're little early aren't you?

Well, I guess I drove a little faster.

Oh, was the milk all right yesterday?

Oh, yes, fine.

Good.

The cows will be glad to hear it.

You need anything else today?

Oh, yes, we need some butter.

Oh, good.

That'll give me an excuse to come back and talk to you

some more.

Hey, Wally, where's the butter?

Right here. Was she there?

Yeah, I think she was waiting for me.

No kidding!

Yeah, she has her hair all fixed,

and she's all dressed up.

Boy, she looks great.

What are you waiting for?

Go ask her for a date.

Well, I'd really like to, but I don't think I should.

I mean, don't you think there might be a company

rule about things like that?

What difference does that make?

You're not a real milkman.

Well, that's all the more reason!

Are you kidding? Go ahead.

Well, OK. Wish me luck.

Good luck.

Oh, hi.

Here's the butter.

Thank you.

I just can't understand it.

She seemed so friendly and glad to see me at first,

and then when I went back with the butter,

she just grabbed it and practically slammed the door

in my face. - Well, what do you care?

If you want my advice, you'll forget about her.

She gets up too early anyway.

The whole thing doesn't make any sense.

Why should she change like that all of a sudden?

Oh, beats me.

You didn't even find out her name, did you?

Well, no, but at least I know where she lives.

Well, what good is that going to do?

Well, I can go over there this afternoon

and find out what happened.

Well, you could have done that this morning.

I know, but this whole thing took me by surprise.

I didn't know what to do. - Hi, fellas.

Hi, Harv.

How'd everything go this morning?

Oh, pretty good.

I sure want to thank you guys for helping me out like this.

Oh, that's OK.

We enjoyed it.

Say, Harv, what's the name of that girl who

lives over on Maple Street?

Maple Street?

Yeah, you know the good looking blonde

with the blue eyes.

Please, I'm a married man.

She lives at 713 Maple.

That's the Wilson's house, but Mrs. Wilson

is hardly what you'd call a good looking blonde.

Well, this girl said something about her aunt.

She must be Mrs. Wilson's niece.

Well, I've never seen her. Maybe she's just visiting.

Why? - Oh, nothing.

I was just wondering.

Hey, Mrs. Wilson's one of my best customers.

Nothing happened, did it? - Oh, no.

I'll see you later, Harv.

Say, Harv, you can't think of any reason

why that girl would slam the door on Rick's face, can you?

- No, I can't. - Oh, it's probably nothing.

I'll see you later.

Hey, wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Hey, you guys--

Well, here we are.

Yeah, here we are.

Well, just tell me one thing. What am I doing here with you?

Well, you're here to give me moral support

and make any intelligent suggestions you might think of.

That sounds ridiculous just saying.

Well, the first thing you got to do is get out of the car.

I've got to figure out what to say to her, don't I?

How does this sound?

Uhh--

Well, that doesn't sound very good.

Why don't you say, "duuuuh-uh"?

That's very funny.

Look, wait'll I get started, will you?

Hey, did you say she was a good looking blonde?

- Yeah. - Well, you better hurry.

There she goes.

Hey!

Hey, wait a minute.

Follow her!

You want to get arrested or something?

Look, will you turn the car around before we lose her.

Well, this is it.

She must be around here someplace.

Well, come on! Let's start looking for her.

We have no idea where she went.

Why don't we just wait here 'til she gets back.

Hey, here's an idea.

Let's lock bumpers with her car.

That'll give you a chance to talk

with her before she drives off.

Just stand on the edge of the bumper and I'll drive forward.

Well, OK, but I'm not sure this is such a good idea.

OK, that's got it.

Oh, that's great.

Hey, there she is.

Hey, she's getting in the wrong car.

Hey, that's the wrong car!

You mean this is the wrong car.

Oh, great.

Hey, well, look. There's a booth over here.

- Hi, fellas. - Hi, Jack.

- Oh, hi, Jack. - How about two chocolate malts?

Coming right up.

We can drive out to our house again.

That is, if you're that interested.

I suppose this whole thing's kind of silly.

The ridiculous part of it is, here

I am chasing a girl all over town

and I don't even know her name.

Well, we know where she lives.

As I say, we could drive back out to her house again.

Oh, let's forget about it.

You got to be a fatalist about these things.

If I was supposed to see the girl again, I would.

OK, I was just trying to give you

the benefit of my years of experience

in matters of this sort.

Pretty nice, huh?

What's that?

That blonde that just walked out.

You guys must be slipping.

What blonde?

Right out there, getting into the red sports car.

Red sports car?!

Hey, that's a girl!

Come on, give me the keys to your car quick!

Well, come on!

I got 'em here someplace.

Go ahead.

Maybe you can catch her.

Oh, hi.

Oh, it's you.

Yeah, can I talk to you for a minute?

About what?

Well, I want to know what happened.

What do you mean what happened?

Well, at first, you seemed so friendly,

and then you practically slammed the door in my face.

I'm sorry if I was rude.

Is that all you wanted to tell me?

Well, no.

Actually, I want to invite you to a party tomorrow night.

Well, thank you very much, but I

think it'd be much nicer if you stayed home

with your wife and children.

Children?

Hey, wait a second, I don't have a wife and children.

Well, gee, Rick, I didn't know you were coming back.

I drank your malt. - Well, never mind that.

Just give me the keys to your car quick.

You mean, she got away again?

Yeah, but at least I know why she's been avoiding me.

She thinks I'm married.

Well, whatever gave her that idea?

Well, I don't know. Come on, give me the keys.

I left them on the table.

Hey, what's this all about anyway?

Well, I was delivering milk for a couple of mornings,

and I met this good looking girl.

You mean the blonde that was just in here?

Yeah.

Here, catch.

What the heck do you think you're doing?

Hey, how about that?

Did you see that shot?

Yeah, we saw it.

Now how am I going to get the keys out of there?

Here hold this. I'll get a spoon.

Well, there's only one thing for me to do.

It won't be easy, but anything for a friend.

Where are the keys? Don't tell me I swallowed them.

You know darn well they're in the vanilla malt.

Here, I'll get them.

Thanks, Jack.

Yeah, kid.

Hey, you might as well drink this one, too.

Well, thanks, Jack, but I don't like vanilla.

It's on the house.

Oh, well, why didn't you say so?

Hey.

Oh, hi.

Where are you going?

Well, I was trying to catch you.

Were you looking for me?

Well, yes.

What did you mean before when you

said you didn't have a wife and children?

Just what I said.

I'm not married.

- You're not? - No.

What made you think I was?

Well, your Christmas card, it said, "Merry Christmas from you

and your wife and your children."

Oh, that.

That wasn't from me.

I was just delivering that for Harvey.

I'm not the regular milkman.

I was just helping him out for a couple of days.

And you're not Harvey Mitchell?

Well, no.

I'm Ricky Mitchell-- I mean Ricky Nelson.

Oh, for goodness sakes.

Oh, what's your name?

I'm Lori Wilson.

You're not married are you?

No, I'm not.

In fact, I don't know anybody in town.

I'm just here visiting my aunt for a few weeks.

Oh.

Say, I hope you don't think I'm rushing things,

but what are you doing tomorrow night?

I have a date.

You do?

Yes, with you, I hope.

Oh, you sure have.

Everloving, you're my one desire.

Everloving, you set my soul on fire.

Everloving, I'll be ever loving you.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Everloving, I will treat you tender.

Everloving, if you will surrender.

Everloving, I'll be ever loving you.

Whoa, whoa.

You're my darling, the only one I'm dreaming of.

I've got to make you mine 'cause you're

the only one I'll ever love.

Everloving, say you'll leave me never.

Everloving, I'll be yours forever.

Everloving, I'll be ever loving you.

Whoa, yea, yeah.

Everloving, I'll be ever loving you.

That was great, Rick.

Oh, thanks.

Have you been singing long?

Oh, for quite a while.

Actually, we're sort of a musical family.

My father plays a banjo.

Oh, really?

Well, I--

Time for refreshments!

Come on, everybody.

Oh, that's why we're here.

You didn't have to panic.

I really wasn't going to play.

I wasn't taking any chances.

I got it.

Hello.

Oh, hi, Harv.

How's everything?

Oh, gee, that's too bad.

I'll ask him.

And if he can't do it, I'm sure Wally can.

Now, don't worry about it.

We'll take care of it some way.

Just a second.

Harriet, it's Harvey on the phone.

He wants to know if the boys can take over for him

again tomorrow morning.

Oh, Rick, Harvey's on the phone, he's got a real bad cold,

and he wants to know if you can take over the milk route again

for him tomorrow morning.

Gee, pop, we're going skiing tomorrow morning.

Oh, Wally, too?

Well, yeah, Wally, Dave, Charlie, the whole gang of us.

I promised him somebody'd help him out.

Well, don't look at me.

What are you doing tomorrow morning, pop?

Harv, yeah, I found somebody.

Oh, good morning.

Well, good morning.

Are you the new milkman?

No, I-- yi--

I-- I'm just substituting for him.

Well, goodbye.

What's the hurry?

Well, I have quite a few deliveries to make.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Oh, good morning.

Good morning.

I haven't seen you before.

You're kind of cute.

Thank you.

I'm really not.

I'm married.

In fact, I have two big--

two small boys at home.

How nice.

Well, bye.

Bye.

Oh, good morning.

Well, hello there, honey.

I haven't seen you before.

No, I'm new.

You see, I'm not a real milkman, I'm just temporary.

Well, don't stand out here in the cold.

Come on in and have a cup of coffee.

Oh, well, thank you, but it's against company regulations.

Oh, don't be silly.

Come on.

Cut it out.

Hey, Ozzie.

I guess I must have been dreaming.

You better get dressed.

Getting pretty late.

Well, gee, you didn't have to get up.

What are you dressed for?

Well, you don't think I'm going to let you go alone

do you, with all those beautiful girls?

Now, get dressed.

I'll put the coffee on.

You think maybe I talk in my sleep?

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