All language subtitles for The Diplomat - 01x01 - The Cinderella Thing.NF.WEBRip.x264-WDYM+CAKES+GalaxyTV+ION10+PSA+RARBG.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

- You want me there on day one.
- I should've dry-cleaned this.

What's the point?

- In waiting a week?
- Yeah.

I will no longer be jet-lagged.
I will be able to focus

and graciously accept your help
getting me on my feet.

But the first week is when you do that.
That's when you get on your feet.

It wouldn't kill you to take a couple days
and just like... sit here and think.

Figure out the next move.

Maybe it's Kabul.

Maybe that's the next move.

Oh, you think the nation of Afghanistan
is not big enough for the both of us?

- It isn't.
- What the fuck is this?

- Put a few in my wallet.
- It should say "ambassador."

- Not yet it shouldn't.
- I'm gonna write "ambassador" on there.

Hello? Hi. She thinks she has to wait
for the embassy in Kabul to open

before she can call herself "ambassador."

Well, that's really fucking stupid.

Kate, it's Tim.

He's writing "ambassador" on my cards.
It looks like "ambulance."

Off the coast of Iran, a massive explosion

aboard British aircraft carrier
HMS Courageous

has killed
at least 25 Royal Navy personnel.

Britain's Ministry of Defence is expected

- to give a statement imminently.
- What the fuck?

- Tim, hang on a sec.
- Earliest reports indicate the damage...

Hello?

- Ms. Wyler?
- Yes.

I have the chief of staff calling
from the White House.

- He's right here.
- Ma'am...

- Hey, I'm back.
- Hello?

- Why?
- Yeah.

No, I get them going after us,
but why the Brits?

Kate, they want a briefing.

- At State?
- No, the White House.

Okay. I gotta go.
White House wants Hal to brief.

It'll take me ten minutes
to prep him. I'll call you back.

Katie.

Not me, you.

Hello?

Hey.

- Come on in.
- Can your guy make two copies of this?

I made a list of who in Tehran
could order a strike on a British vessel

and who seemed pissed off

- we took their tanker.
- I think they're all pissed off.

But some tweeted about it
and not who you'd expect.

- Billie.
- We gotta go.

I guess you can share one.

This is Katherine Wyler.

She was our number two
in Beirut and Islamabad.

When we seized the tanker last week,

the Iranian regime signaled its outrage
in a couple of unusual ways.

What is she doing?

She knows a lot about Iran. I didn't get
into what we wanted to discuss.

This would be easier
if you each had your own copy.

Have a seat.

Okay.

- How's Hal?
- He's good.

- He's a good man.
- Thank you.

- Did great work in Afghanistan.
- Sure did.

- We don't have anyone in London.
- Mm-hm.

- A bad time not to have anyone in London.
- Right.

Twenty-five of their sailors get killed
because Iran wants to send me a message.

- We don't know it was Iran.
- Whoever it was,

we need someone substantial
to be the ambassador in London.

- He'll be great. He's a great choice.
- I'm sorry?

Hal. And you didn't have to ask me.

- We worked in different countries before.
- We're not talking about Hal.

You're experienced.
You'd signal we're taking this seriously.

You'd be at every funeral, memorial...

Sorry, I'm going to Kabul.

We'll take care of that.

They'll love Hal in London.
He's good at all that.

- It's not gonna be Hal.
- Why not?

Because he called
the secretary of state a war criminal.

I promised
I wouldn't send him anywhere ever again.

I realize London
has a ceremonial component to it

and you were ready
to do more substantive work in Kabul.

I'm hoping to save a shred of what
we spent 2400 American lives building.

It feels substantive.

- Billie.
- I'm just saying it's hard to imagine.

- She can't imagine it.
- The president is asking you to serve

as ambassador to the United Kingdom.
We have a plane waiting.

We'd like you to get on it.

It is an honor and a privilege.

That's more like it.

It's exactly what they wanna hear. They've
been hosting garden parties for 50 years.

The president
is asking you to take it up a notch.

Mm-hm.

- He picked you because you're experienced.
- He wants an experienced person

- to show up and look sad.
- You're such a fucking snot.

There was an argument
between Billie and the president

about whether my mission
was to look guilty or just sad.

People died. Showing up matters.

I am an emotional support dog.

- It was probably Iran.
- Please. They're broke.

They don't want to bomb somebody for
taking their oil. They want the oil back.

- So who?
- Russia, China, ISIS.

Russia is not gonna torpedo
a British aircraft carrier.

- Why not?
- Because they're busy.

Takes the focus off Eastern Europe.
Gets the president bogged down

in the Middle East,
makes him look like an asshole.

It's a British vessel.
You don't wanna consider the possibility

it was attacked
because someone doesn't like the British?

- My hands are swelling. This is not good.
- Whoever it was, the Gulf is on fire.

The president is sending you to stop a war
before it starts, not... butter a crumpet.

White House wants you in the SCIF.

We're screening imagery
from the Pentagon, NSA and NGA,

- see if we can figure out who did it.
- I have a guess.

- We're not guessing.
- My guess is Iran.

Is the door closed?

- Yeah.
- Still seeing that girl?

Twenty-five British sailors just died.

Gonna tell you something five people know.
You're six. I don't want her to be seven.

- I won't tell her.
- We're gonna lose the vice president.

Like, die?

Resign. Something will come out,
she'll get knocked around for awhile,

then step down. Maybe six months.

- Whoa.
- Yeah. So we need somebody else.

And I have a few ideas.

But one of them...
I want you to check her out.

Tell me if I'm crazy.

Her corridor rep is fantastic,
but she's a little...

- What?
- I don't know.

- Needs a haircut.
- Pfft. No.

I'm not asking
for "return of the kingmaker."

- Just take a look. Tell me what you think.
- When you call me that, it makes it worse.

- Kingmaker? I'm sorry.
- No, you're not.

You're right. I'm not. I'm asking you
a favor and you're being a pain in my ass.

And you're being a bully. No means no.

You can't say no. I put her on a plane.
She's gonna be your new ambassador.

Thank you.

Welcome to London, Ambassador Wyler.

I'm Stuart Hayford,
your deputy chief of mission.

I guess this is what
arranged marriage feels like.

- Gwen Hempill from the Foreign Office.
- Such a pleasure.

I'm so sorry.
What a terrible thing that's happened.

Ambassador Wyler, it is an honor.

Call me Hal. One ambassador is plenty.

- Have the numbers changed?
- Twenty-eight casualties.

Search and rescue is still looking.

Jesus Christ.

This is Frances Munning,
the residence manager.

- Welcome to Winfield House, ambassador.
- Thank you.

Hello, everyone.

Hello, ma'am.

- And welcome to you, Ambassador Wyler.
- Call me Hal. One ambassador's plenty.

Perhaps Mr. Wyler.

Please. Follow me.

We gonna do this every time?

The house was purchased by Barbara Hutton
shortly before her marriage to Cary Grant.

Big piece of land
for right in the middle of London.

Miss Hutton moved to Winfield
with her young son

just after the abduction
of the Lindbergh baby.

Regent's Park provided,
you know, a reassuring perimeter.

The only private garden in London
larger than Winfield is Buckingham Palace.

Oh, for God's sake.

The vice president was missing

from yesterday's Situation Room meeting.

Her office cited schedule constraints,

but there's a growing sense of frustration
among supporters...

The president is talking to the PM
at 12:00. He wants her on the call.

- Holy shit.
- Fancy.

- Ambassador Vayle wasn't on those calls.
- Yeah.

Everything all right?

I showed them around.
She checked the sheets in the Adams Suite.

- Okay.
- To see if they were on the bed.

Were they?

Yes.

After your call
with the president and prime minister,

you'll go to the Foreign Office
and present a copy of your credentials.

Is the secretary of state
on the call with the president?

Ganon? He shouldn't be.

- Neither should I.
- He's not.

In the afternoon,
you'll visit the Greenwich Naval Memorial.

To lay a wreath
in honor of the fallen sailors.

- Right.
- And at the end of the day,

we'll have a rehearsal for
the official presentation of credentials.

- Why are we doing it twice?
- You can't start work

until you give a copy of your credentials
to the Foreign Office.

Then you'll submit them officially
at Buckingham Palace.

We try to do a dry run with all the gear.

There have been issues
getting in and out of the carriage.

- Carriage?
- Mrs. Vayle split her skirt up the back.

- Then the horses...
- Nothing to worry about.

Did you pack a dress, maybe tea-length?

No.

- Pippa.
- We have a stylist.

She'll come by the embassy.
You get a top hat and tails.

This is today? When is the ceremony?

We're not sure exactly, but if we can run
the rehearsal, we'd like to.

So you can photograph it?

Inviting a couple reporters?

- One. She's good, she'll do a feature.
- Push it.

Give them a break.
They need a picture for the website.

- On a horse?
- They'll do before and after photos.

First-time ambassador.
Lean into the Cinderella thing.

I am not Cinderella.

I'm here for 30 funerals. The only
tea-length garment I packed is a burka.

I have a black suit
and another black suit,

and I'm not getting dressed
by someone named Pippa

so a women's magazine
can ask who I'm wearing

and what advice I have for little girls.

It's fine. We'll ditch it.

- Great.
- We're gonna head over to the embassy.

If you'd like to join us,
sit in on a briefing?

- Sure.
- Okay, Hal?

I think I'm gonna stretch my legs.

My husband was an ambassador for
a long time. This will be an adjustment.

Of course.

- Him tagging along is not...
- Copy.

- Let's get the cars.
- She'll need a minute to change.

Uh-huh.

Into...?

Something... more?

Get your feet off the furniture.

Barbara Hutton fucked Cary Grant
on this table.

They want you at the memorial at 3:00.

I'll have them call
if we're running behind.

You are no longer in charge
of my movements.

Yeah, but I don't wanna wait for an hour
because no one can find you.

Not great.

Call Darya, tell her to stop saying,
"Afghan women's health."

She has to use words
like "atrocity, dismemberment."

- Who's she talking to?
- I don't know, UNHCR.

Someone in Pakistan.

"Sit in on a briefing"?

It would have been rude of him
not to offer.

You didn't have to say yes.

Did you or did you not ask me
to help get your feet on the ground

or your ass in the saddle
or whatever it was?

Is that okay?

- Better.
- Sure? I can do the pit wash.

You don't need it.

- Is it bad?
- No, it's good.

Oh, my God, stop. Stop.

You're perfect.

Fuck you. Am I okay?

What are you gonna say to him?
The prime minister.

I am a listener on the call.

That is the opposite
of ass in the saddle, Kate.

More than once, I've told you,
when you land in a new post,

there is some wisdom
in spending a week or a month

- with your mouth shut, listening.
- I never did it. It was a dumb idea.

Rayburn is gonna talk about NATO,

but you're here
to patch things up with the Brits.

- Keep the focus tight.
- I'm not doing this the way you would.

That's fine. Just don't do it wrong.

Morning, ambassador. Morning, sir.

Welcome to Embassy London.

We'll show you your office later.

We need to get you on the call
with the president.

Good morning, ambassador. Eidra Park.
Welcome to Embassy London.

CIA chief of station.

- You are having a day.
- We are.

These are the latest images
of the carrier.

- From?
- Air Force drones in the Gulf.

And this is yesterday,

HMS Courageous on its way to joint
exercises with us in the Indian Ocean.

They clocked some instability
in a propeller

and diverted to the Royal Navy Base
in Bahrain for repairs.

- Nobody spent a long time planning this.
- No.

- Weapon fragments?
- Not yet.

The investigation hasn't ramped up.

- Still pulling bodies out of the water.
- Yeah. I've got her.

The president and the prime minister
will be on in a second.

Thank you.

Good morning.

I have President Rayburn
and Ambassador-designate Wyler

for Prime Minister Trowbridge.

Thank you so much.
I'll connect the prime minister.

Mr. President?

Nicol, what a fucking horror show.

Sorry about the wall.

It's frightfully bare.

There was a Jackson Pollock up there.

It was a bit of a zing
among all the old masters.

- The Vayles took most of their art home.
- Mm-hm.

They left the Titian in the drawing room.
Donation to the house.

- Generous.
- Isn't it?

Have you and Ambassador Wyler
arranged for the shipping of yours,

or is that something with which
I could be of assistance?

Our art?

Mm-hm.

Kate's a career officer.
Not a political appointee.

Ronald Vayle, he became ambassador,

because he raised $2 million
for the president.

Like most American ambassadors
in gorgeous European posts.

Goodness.

Kate and I are like British ambassadors.
Lot of experience in crisis zones.

- No art.
- I'm so sorry.

We're okay with it.

Could you direct me toward my driver?

- Pardon?
- Driver of my car.

I'm sorry, you don't have one. Or a car.
Mrs. Vayle purchased a Jaguar

and hired a driver,
but she's had it sent back to the States.

The Jaguar. Not the driver.

Shall I call you a taxi?

Death toll's up to 32, and the president
offered to carpet-bomb Tehran.

- What did the PM say?
- He was polite but I'm sure he's worried.

I'll try to dial it down when we speak
to the foreign secretary.

That could take a moment.
To get to the foreign secretary.

Secretary of state hasn't called him yet.

And likely won't until he's had a chance
to speak with the Saudis and the UAE.

- Secretary Ganon hasn't called him yet?
- No.

So I can't call him.

Yeah, you really can't call anyone.

The whole thing is not ideal.

This is your wing.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Ambassador-designate Katherine Wyler.

- Welcome, ambassador.
- Welcome, ma'am.

- Nice to meet you.
- It's an honor, ma'am.

- Nice to meet you. Wow.
- Nice to have you here.

- Morning. There are a lot of you. Hi.
- Welcome to the embassy.

Ma'am, I have Ambassador Wyler
on the phone for you.

- Would you like to take it in your office?
- Um...

It's that one, right there.

Yup.

- I'll connect you.
- Thanks.

Hi.

- How did it go?
- Fine. What's wrong?

- You had a driver in Beirut, right?
- Yes.

This place has six gardeners,
and the wife doesn't get a car.

We were not married in Beirut.

I had a driver
because I was a deputy chief of mission.

- None of the wives gets a car?
- I swear to God.

I need to get out,
let people know you're here.

No, you don't.
Neither of us can do anything,

because Ganon isn't calling the Brits
till this afternoon.

What?

Too busy whipping the Sunni coalition
into a frenzy.

He's a fucking moron.

Well, he's my boss.

He shouldn't be.

- Did you call Darya?
- No.

- I will. I will.
- I should be in Kabul.

Ganon isn't repairing
the North Atlantic Alliance.

He's swinging his dick
around the Persian Gulf.

Washington doesn't have
a UK problem, Kate.

Washington has an Iran problem.
You're the one with the UK problem.

If you think the foreign secretary
needs attention, call him.

- Ganon would shit a live ostrich.
- Why?

Any idea how much planning went into
the batting order on your phone sheet?

It sounds scintillating.

The president calls, the secretary
of state calls, the Pentagon calls.

- Jesus Christ.
- Don't act like it's bullshit.

It's about fundamental respect
for institutional norms.

You're covering Ganon's ass for him.

It's not a betrayal
of rules-based democracy.

You're gonna be in Dennison's office.
Do a pop-by.

Okay. Hal, I gotta go.

Ready to tie the knot?

Robin will memorialize the moment,
if I can locate our spot...

We like to do it in front
of Britannia grasping hands with America,

but more and more
we find it's problematic.

Africa as a young naked boy,
and Australia in nothing but a bush hat.

Good afternoon. Mind if I say hello?

Oh, wonderful. Foreign Secretary
Austin Dennison, this is...

Ambassador Wyler,
if she's handed over that document.

She's done it, but we've not yet
photographed it, so it may not be real.

- Sir, it's an honor to meet you.
- Pleasure. Stuart.

Good to see you, sir.

Gwen, mind if I steal her for a moment,
or does that muck up your day?

Of course. What a stroke of luck.

- Tell Davies to go ahead.
- Ma'am.

- I know.
- Small talk. Weather.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

We're grateful to have you
jumping into the fray.

Of course.

The prime minister was moved,
speaking with President Rayburn.

I believe he's very much
on the front foot.

He is. I know the secretary of state
is eager to talk to you.

I think he just wants to make sure
his ducks are in a row before he does.

The carrier is drifting, I've learned.
Rather unfortunate.

- Which way?
- Towards Iran.

- Oh, God.
- It's quite vulnerable out there.

We need to be sure
we're keeping the temperature low.

I'll inform the secretary of state.

I was just about to brief
the prime minister. Can you join?

- You met him on the phone.
- I'm not sure that's a great idea.

- Sorry to disturb.
- Ah!

Not at all, we were due a break.

That or ritual suicide.

Ambassador Katherine Wyler,
Prime Minister Nicol Trowbridge.

Welcome, welcome.
We hear wonderful things.

- Sir, it's an honor to meet you.
- Ah. Honor to be met.

- Rayburn didn't let you get a word in.
- Ah.

Brilliant of him sending you.
Experienced. Professional. Female.

I am many of those things.

I'm so sorry...

You know the last female ambassador
to the Court of St. James's?

- Long time ago.
- Over a hundred years.

- Fifty, but yes.
- What a proud tradition you've had.

Captains of industry spending a year
on holiday whilst we've got work to do.

You and I, I'm sure,
will accomplish things together.

I certainly hope we will.
That's why I'm here.

There's a mess in the Gulf, but you know
the players. You'll be a great help.

We should... Let's hole us up
somewhere where they can't find us.

Good afternoon.

- Good day, sir.
- Hal Wyler. Nice to meet you.

- I'm the ambassador's wife.
- Oh. Oh, not at all, sir.

We're the Metropolitan Police,
here to keep you and the ambassador safe.

And we couldn't be more grateful.

- Is that your car?
- Uh, it is, sir. Yeah.

- Trouble you for a lift?
- Wish I could. Official business only.

Okay, I understand.

- Might I book you a cab?
- Oh, I'm gonna take a walk.

- Nice to meet you.
- You too, sir.

Sir! Sir!

Oh, my goodness, I am so sorry.

Of course, you drive
on the other side of the road.

The president freaked them out.

They're worried he's gonna
threaten to bomb Tehran.

Then they're really in it.

I'm sure he's trying to make them feel
like he's paying attention.

They want him to keep quiet.
Let the Brits set the tone.

- Okay. Ganon can get into it.
- They want me to handle it.

That isn't great.

This is exactly what Hal did
to Ganon in Tel Aviv.

Blew in and made
the whole American delegation

look like they were sitting around
with their thumbs up their asses.

But this isn't you
charging into the PM's office.

The foreign secretary tracked you down.
That was his idea.

Was it?

Hal.

- Really?
- Yup.

You think your husband...?

Pulled me out of a photo op
and dumped me in the PM's lap? Yeah.

Okay. Wow. Impressive.

You say that now. Always comes at a cost.

- Which is what?
- You don't know until you know.

But then you definitely know.

Well, at this point,
they're asking you to step in.

You kind of have to.

Mr. Secretary,
the prime minister understands

the attack may have been a message for us.

But the president signaled
quite a lot of outrage

when he spoke to the prime minister,

and they're worried he may make
a public statement before they're able...

It was a condolence call
for 30 servicemen.

Exactly what was he supposed
to signal if not outrage?

I think what troubled them
was the statement,

"If I find out it was Iran, I swear,
we're gonna light the place up."

I'm sure that's not what he said.

It's exactly what he said.

You got a readout?

I was on the call.

Wasn't I sending you to Kabul?

Sir, no one is more surprised
to find me here than I am.

I don't know, ambassador.
I haven't called the foreign secretary.

You've been at post for an hour and
you talked to the prime minister. Twice.

They want us involved,

but not if we're planning to attack
an unstable regime without any evidence.

Inform your friend the PM
that Rayburn's a lot of talk.

He's not planning to "light up"
the Republic of Iran.

They need to hear it from you.
On its face, it's credible.

We have an elderly president
who just lost the House

and we have a young VP who'd be
glad to prove she likes to blow things up.

That is my problem. Not yours.

Not if they can't get you on the phone,
sir, then apparently it's mine.

He'll keep the president
off the air for a day.

- One?
- Doesn't help, does it?

It's not nothing.
They'll appreciate its non-nothingness.

Very close to nothing.

Raymond Braysdale, MP Aberconwy.

Ambassador Wyler, United States.

Ma'am, look at me.

Mr. Wyler's here. Does he know Meg...?

Don't look over there.

- Does he know Meg Roylin?
- I don't know.

- Is he talking to Meg whoever?
- Roylin.

- Is that a problem?
- She's a Tory operative.

She built the strategy
behind Trowbridge's campaign.

Then he fired her
when the papers started saying

she was the brains behind the operation.

She takes racists
and turns them into lovable guys

you wish had time to coach peewee soccer.

Remember I told you
there would be a price? For Dennison?

- Hey.
- Stop moving.

- How did it go at the Foreign Office?
- You know exactly how it went.

I'll be right there,
but I got someone I want you to meet.

- No. Absolutely no.
- Uh-oh.

Bad connection. Come on.

Now you've met my husband.

Pull her.

Really?

Your first media hit in the country
can't be a candid with Meg Roylin.

Pardon us. Thank you, thank you.

Step aside, please.
Pardon us. Step aside, please.

- This way, ma'am.
- Step aside. Metropolitan Police.

- This is a lot.
- This way.

She's not in cardiac arrest.
We're just trying to go.

Sir? Thank you, sir.

- Not today.
- So sorry.

Not to worry. I'll call you. Thank you.

- Sir, your name, please?
- Ambassador Wyler, United States.

- Are you okay?
- Twitter said it was a threat on her life.

We had Meg Roylin coming from one side and
Jamie Taro of the Daily Mail on the other.

I can't have that be the first image
that shows up

when you google
"Ambassador Katherine Wyler."

It says Ambassador Wyler's leaving
the memorial right now. In a police car.

- Clearly she's not.
- Is it, perhaps, the other one?

The other Ambassador Wyler.

We got a call earlier.

Mr. Wyler borrowed a vehicle.

From the police?

Oh. The press office sent a nice piece
about you at the memorial... Hang on.

Uh, "U.S. Ambassador Wyler

pays his respects
at the Greenwich Naval Memorial

on his first day as representative
to the Court of St. James's."

- Hmm.
- Stuart Hayford's office.

Eidra.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Members of parliament
are canceling visits to Greenwich.

Security concerns raised
by your hasty exit.

It was a misunderstanding.

It's a fast boat. We can't see markings,

but it definitely looks like
the kind Iran's been stockpiling.

Shit.

- Yeah.
- Why?

Means it's Iran.

Means it's an Iranian boat.

Israeli satellites clocked it
off the coast near Sirik.

- Which is...?
- In Iran.

Is that something everyone knows?

It's a very small coastal village in Iran.

They lose track of it here,
but the timing lines up.

- When did this come in?
- Few minutes ago.

- Does State have it?
- Ganon?

- I'm sure he got it when we did.
- You think my day holds?

The Brits asked her to keep the president
quiet until the carrier's in a safer spot.

- And the White House agreed?
- Ganon agreed.

For a day. When there wasn't
real evidence pointing at Iran.

It's not an indictment. It's a boat.

In the right place at the right time.

I should tell Dennison I got the day
before it's gone.

We gotta get you to your town hall.

Your speech.

Kill it. I hate speeches.

Can you hang back a minute?

The job is like 80% speeches.

- They asked me to slow-roll her clearance.
- Who?

Ganon?

Shit.

There could be plenty of reasons for that.

Really?

No. He wants to get rid of her.

Shit.

- Why give her a day?
- Probably thought it'd take that long

to find a reason to get her out,
but now we have her husband

stealing a police car
and conspiring with shady Tories.

Can I use the SCIF?

What do you think?

- Of her?
- Yeah.

I'm impressed. I was dubious at first,
but she turned me around.

I think I'll ditch my plans to move to
a place with better career opportunities

so I can stand by her side
for a tour that'll reinvigorate

the special relationship
and usher in a new American century.

Give her a chance.

I'm not fucking her, I'm fucking you.
I'm trying to give you a chance.

What happened?

The five people
who know what's going on here...

- Yeah.
- The secretary of state's one of them.

Right?

- No.
- What the fuck, Billie?

- He doesn't need to know.
- He's trying to shitcan her.

- I'm sure he's not.
- She wound up in a sit-down with the PM,

thanks to the husband,
who by the way, Jesus fucking Christ.

He's a handful, but people love him.

Ganon thinks she's eating off his plate.

The president needs to say out loud
that he asked her to take the lead here.

It's not gonna happen.

It's a test. The president wants to see
if she can handle herself.

- If she's afraid of Ganon...
- She's not.

That's the kind of information I need.

It's why I read you in.

Is that why you read me in?

Or are you asking me
to turn her into something?

I don't know. Maybe.

- That's the clarity I'm looking for.
- I don't have a lot of clarity.

I just spent three years building a VP

who could take the torch from an old man
and get us another term.

This was not my plan.

She handles things.
We get people who can campaign.

They can't handle anything
and we're drowning.

Oh, fuck that. You see an opportunity,
you can't let it go by.

Yeah, I can't.
Who do you think taught me that?

No, "atrocity."

Atrocity. It means "killing people
and hacking them up into little pieces."

Darya, if you say "women's health,"

they think they're funding a yoga studio
in Jalalabad.

Listen, I gotta go. Okay.

Ganon's trying to get rid of you.

That was fast.

An apology could take the edge off.

He's trying to keep the Gulf
from boiling over.

I'm not calling him
to say I made an oopsie.

Might be worth it.

Hmm. In a week,
the Brits will have set the tone.

- Ganon won't remember any of this.
- Ma'am...

you are not gonna be here in a week.

You're not on the books yet.

Ganon will have to do some explaining,
but he'll blame Hal,

which won't take much convincing.

You called him Hal.

First time.

Sorry.

Everyone does once they really know him.
Guess you got the idea.

I did.

Maybe it's all right.

What does that mean?

You don't seem to be all that thrilled
to be here. It's not Jalalabad.

Someone is shooting missiles
at boats in the Persian Gulf.

Even I can get it up
for averting another bloodbath

- in the motherfucking Gulf.
- Sorry.

I was just asking.

Who was gonna do the feature?

The rehearsal.

Me in a gown, with a horse.

British Vogue.

God, I hate this shit.

What?

You know who you can't fire?

Cinderella.

I'm not sure if this is the same schedule.
I don't think anything has changed.

Pensy, find Leonard if you could, please.

The article won't be online till tomorrow,
but they'll put pictures on the website.

It's fucking brilliant.
A media darling by sunup.

- Fucking brilliant.
- It is.

Told you you were ready.

You and I did all the things we do
to launch you.

Drop-kicked me
into the center of the action,

so I can make promises I can't keep,
while alienating my superiors

for a strategically insignificant
moment of access.

And now we're distracting
from the clusterfuck with a media splash

designed to make me
more attractive to women.

You're a snob.

Zip this.

And a misogynist.

You're the prime minister's new
best friend and you're gonna be famous.

I should be getting a blow job
for that phone call.

I didn't wanna be famous. You're so famous
nobody wants to work with you.

How is this a $1600 piece of clothing?
It doesn't even have pockets.

Makes your ass look fantastic.

We look good.

Wow.

I'm not a dress person.

- You're faking it spectacularly.
- Okay.

We'll start with candids
for the Vogue spread,

and then some formal portraits for us.

The body count went up, 41 dead.

Yeah.

Oh, ma'am, ma'am.
Uma is outside, whenever you're ready.

- Uma?
- The reporter.

Okay. They may want more help
with the search.

There's a guy
I should call at the Pentagon.

Ma'am, I'll talk to the guy.

And I talk to Uma.

Give me your phone.

His name is Gerald Tober.
He runs maritime search and rescue.

I used to do your job.

It is better than this one.

Ma'am...

I am sorry about today.

- You knew the thing with Dennison was...
- Don't worry about it.

- Hal makes a lot of magic. Hard to resist.
- Well, next time I'll know.

You won't.
It's like a drug. You can't say no.

It's okay, he'll be gone soon.

- He will?
- Let's get a look at you. It's perfect.

- I think it is. Right?
- Absolutely.

- Let's look at you in the light.
- Okay.

Frances?

Mr. Hayford.

Why did you tell me about the sheets?

- You said she checked the sheets.
- In the Adams Suite.

You asked for relevant information.
It's a guest suite.

They don't sleep in the same bed.

I don't wanna make your job
any harder than it already is,

but it would be great
if there weren't any shots of me

looking wistfully into the distance
as I caress my own neck.

- Ma'am, could I borrow you?
- Mm-hm.

Is Mr. Wyler leaving?

Yes.

Um...

Is he coming back?

He will get me on my feet,
and then he will go.

It is a two-person job.

Mrs. Dursley can plan a menu
without the help of Hal Wyler.

- Yes, but...
- The president asked me to do him a solid.

At what point do you think I should have
raised the epic failure of my marriage?

- Ma'am...
- This was fun, I feel like we're closer.

I need to step away and change my shoes

because Uma and Pippa think
I'll project more power in a block heel.

Yeah.

You're getting divorced.

No, we're not.

- Does the White House know?
- There's nothing to know.

The ambassador says your...
Your marriage is over.

Ever been married?

This doesn't work
if she's getting divorced.

You can't slot someone in the
vice presidency if she's getting divorced.

She'll take me back.

Okay. I gotta talk to Billie.

You work it out with her
and the president...

No. You don't tell anyone.
She will take me back.

I...

do things that make her want to leave me,
and I will not do them again.

You were here two hours, made one call.
The secretary of state wants to fire her.

I'm a big pain in the ass
but it doesn't work without me.

Okay.

Then tell her. If she wants it, fine,
but I am not sneaking around.

I can't tell her, she'll blow it!

She hates cameras
and microphones and people.

Right now, she is cutting a fucking ulcer

because she has to make nice
with a reporter.

Then who the fuck thought
she should be vice president?

She is the one you want.

Not Grace Penn, not me.

No one with the temperament to win a
campaign should be in charge of anything.

It's the most obvious rule in the world.
No one who likes power should have it.

You can't eliminate
every public-facing piece of the job.

That's why we're here.

In a land of hats.

She is a frog in a pot of water.
We have six months.

We can turn the heat up slowly,
and she won't jump out.

But you can't tell her
you're boiling her alive.

This metaphor gives me
a lot of confidence.

Billie says you're good at this.

And I'm good at this, which we all know,
despite the chaos which reigns around me.

We can get her there.

Not if she doesn't want it.

Or you.

Of course she wants me.
She fucking loves me.

You can't think about it too hard.
It'll break your heart.

Step away please, if we could,
while we have the light.

Thank you.

To me. That's nice.

Moving on to the carriage now,
if you please.

Thank you. I believe you have enough.

Hey. Psst.

They keep touching me.

That's part of it.

I scratched my face and picked a wedgie.
I think I have lipstick on my ass.

- Nothing.
- Okay.

Hey.

You look incredible.

Shall we go for a ride?

Um... yeah.

Mm-hm. Got it.

Look at her.

Just like a princess.

Ambassador.

If you put them back on and walk,
they might soften.

I think it will break my pelvis.

This feels small. Is it a bit small?

- It's a bit roomy in the shoulders.
- Yeah.

Why don't we get Jonathan to take us up
to the van and get the tailor.

- Are my pants a little short?
- We'll take a look at that too.

Okay. How are you doing?

Thank you.

May I fix your tie?

- Yeah. I think I screwed up the knot.
- Okay.

You're perfectly safe. This is very mild.
You'll be yourself in no time.