All language subtitles for T A O O a H S01E39 Oscillating Ozzie 1080p AMZN WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-WhatsBeyond (1)_track3_[eng]

- Hi, everybody.

I'm Harriet Nelson.

You know, I think one of
the most wonderful features

of my Hotpoint range is
the thrift cooker that can

be used for deep fat frying.

It's just wonderful
for frying donuts

and French fried potatoes
and oh, so many things.

- It's good for frying
shrimps too, isn't it, Mom?

- Don't get personal, David.

Hotpoint quality
appliances, present

America's favorite
family comedy,

"The Adventures of
Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And of course, his lovely wife,
Harriet, is Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson,

and his younger brother,
the irrepressible, Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelson's next
door neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- More coffee, dear?

- Oh, uh, no thanks.

I have enough left right here.

- You didn't finish
your eggs, did you?

- Oh.

Well, I ate most of them.

How come you fried
the eggs this morning?

- Oh, I don't know.

You've had boiled eggs
every morning for so long,

I just thought I'd fry them,
give you a little change.

You didn't like them, did you?

- Oh, yeah.

They were OK.

It's-- I ate most of them.

- Yes, but you didn't like them.

I could tell.

You didn't smile.

- Oh, well, I don't very often
smile when I'm eating eggs.

Not unless it happens to be
a wide egg sandwich, and then

I kinda--

- I'm sorry.

I just thought I'd give you
something a little different

for a change.

- Oh.
I liked them.

They were OK.

It's just that I usually
have boiled eggs,

and I don't think
there's any reason

to change just for the
sake of changing, you know.

- I suppose that's a
masculine attitude.

Personally, I like things
a little different once

in a while.

Gives you a fresh outlook.

Maybe I'm just in a
reckless mood today.

I've even been thinking
about having my hair cut.

How do you think I'd look as
one of the new shorter cuts?

- Well, I wouldn't want
you to get a crew cut.

- Don't be silly.

I wouldn't get a crew cut--

At least until the
middle of summer.

I'm surprised you haven't
noticed though dear,

most of the girls are
wearing their hair

with a shorter hairdo.

- You know, it's a
funny thing about women.

Practically all men like
women with their hair

long and their skirts short,
and look what happens.

- Reverse psychology.

Women do the opposite
to get things they want.

Look at the attention women
have had in the past two years.

- Well, OK.

I mean, if you like
people staring at you

as you walk down the street.

- Not especially.

It's the reason they
lengthened the skirts.

- And what about your hair?

I mean, you couldn't
wait til it grew back in,

and now you want to
chop it all off again.

- Well, evidently,
you don't want me to.

- Well, I don't care.

It's your head.

- Funny thing.

I noticed that when I was
brushing my teeth this morning.

- Oh no-- but you asked
me how I liked your hair.

And frankly, I don't care.

You cut it any way you want.

As I say, it's your head.

No-- I already said
that, didn't I?

- It's funny how men
get set in their ways.

It seems to be a masculine trait
to resist change of any sort.

For instance, you
like my hair this way,

so you don't want me
to cut it any shorter.

You like boiled
eggs, fried won't do.

- Well, it isn't a question of
men being set in their ways--

At least I'm not.

I happen to like
my head boiled--

I mean, my eggs boiled.

I've liked them
that way for years.

Just because I like the
same thing year after year

doesn't mean I'm set in my ways.

- And what does it mean?

- It means I'm stubborn.

I mean-- it means
that I'm a fellow

of average, normal tastes.

Lots of people like
extraordinary things.

They like unusual things.

I happen to be conservative
and I like things just sort

of average.

- It's nothing to
get excited about.

- No, well I mean, I'm sorry.

I'm not getting excited.

It's just that I am
an average type of guy

who likes things average.

That's all.

A man of average tastes.

Do we have any more sugar, dear?

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

- Oh, don't touch the wet paint.

- Didn't you just paint
this fence last fall?

- Well, this is
Catherine's idea.

She had me paint it white before
because she expected a lot

of snow during the winter.

Now she wants it green
to match the lawn.

- Women get some crazy
ideas, don't they?

- You never know what they're
going to think of next.

- So darn changeable.

They're never satisfied to leave
things go the way they are.

- I think that's
feminine nature, Oz.

- Let me ask you this.

How do you like
your eggs cooked?

- Sunny side up.

We going to eat right
here in the yard?

- Oh, no.

I was just thinking
of something.

For years, I've been enjoying
a couple of medium boiled eggs

for breakfast every morning.

Been enjoying them for years.

All of a sudden this morning,
without a word of warning,

I get fried eggs.

- Well, I hope you didn't
take it sitting down, Oz.

If I were you,
I'd object plenty.

Why don't you put
an ad in the paper?

"I will not be responsible for
any eggs fried by my wife."

- No, it's not only
the eggs, Thorny.

It's the whole idea.

What would you say if your
wife suddenly walked up to you

and said, I want to get
my hair cut right now?

Would you object?

- Well, I certainly would.

Put my foot right down.

- Absolutely.

Because you like her
hair the way it is.

Nice and long.

- Well, not
necessarily long, Oz.

I just want her to have hair.

She just had it cut yesterday.

- Just because I like
Harriet's hair the way

it is, because I like my
eggs boiled, right away,

I'm set in my ways.

Does that mean that
I'm set in my ways?

Am I an old fuddy duddy?

Am I a stick in the mud?

Am I narrow minded?

The answer is no.

- Oz, if you ask me a
question, let me answer it.

- You feel you're set
in your ways, Thorny?

- Well, not necessarily.

- Of course not.

But women don't see it that way.

Because a guy enjoys
boiled eggs in the morning,

they want to change him.

Switch to fried eggs.

Does that make any sense?

No.

- There you go answering again.

- We go bowling the
same night every week.

Does that mean that we're--

- No.

- Our way is no.

- Beat you that time.

- I'm on my way down
the drugstore right now.

I'm going to buy two
quarts of ice cream.

Quart of chocolate and
a quart of vanilla.

Because I happen to like
vanilla and chocolate.

Does that mean that
I'm set in my ways?

Of course it doesn't, Thorny.

- You know Oz, I think I'll walk
down to the drugstore with you.

I think the new
"Esquire" magazine is in.

- There you are.

You always walk down
the drugstore with me

around the end of the
week because that's when

"Esquire" magazine comes in.

Doesn't mean you're
set in your ways.

As a matter of fact, you
don't have to buy "Esquire."

You could buy the
"Housewives Gazette."

- Yeah, if I were a housewife.

- I mean, if you
really wanted to,

you could buy the "Housewives
Gazette" instead of "Esquire,"

because you aren't
set in your ways.

- Oz, I like "Esquire."

- Well, yes, I know.

But you could buy the
"Housewives Gazette" instead,

though.

That's the point
I'm trying to make.

- Oz, I just changed my mind.

I don't think I'll walk down to
the drugstore with you today.

- Why not?

- I have a feeling I'd come home
with a "Housewives Gazette."

- Hello?

- Oh, hello, Harriet.

It's Mary Dunkle.

- Oh, Mary.

How's your cold?

- Oh, I'm nearly back to normal.

The doctor gave me a shot of
a wonderful serum yesterday.

Fixed me up overnight?

- Well, that's fine.

- 'Course, I still cough a
little and sneeze a little

and wheeze a little.

- I thought you
were all fixed up.

- Well, the hives are gone.

- Hives?

- Yeah, the hives
from the first shot.

- Oh, you had two shots?

- Well, yes.

You see, one for my cold.

But my system had a
negative reaction.

So I broke out in hives.

Then he gave me a second
shot for the hives.

- What did he do for your cold?

- Well, I'm going over to
see him in a few minutes.

Of course, he's working
under a handicap.

He's sick in bed
with a cold himself.

- How are Ozzie and the boys?

- Fine, thanks.

- Oh, I almost forgot.

Remember you told me you
were looking for a rug?

Well, listen to this.

On the way downtown
this morning,

I saw the most beautiful brown
rug in the Emporium window.

Just perfect for
your living room.

- I'm way ahead of you, Mary.

- You've seen it?

- Yesterday.

In fact, I'm having it
delivered tonight while Ozzie's

at the bowling alley.

- You're going to
surprise him, huh?

- In a way, yes.

You know how men resist any
changes around the house?

Well, I figure if he
walks in and there it

is in familiar surroundings,
he's much more apt to like it.

- Just like Herb.

I remember I wanted new
kitchen linoleum once,

so I had the man
put it down, had it

all waxed before Herb came home.

- Did he like it?

- Well, I think he would have
if he hadn't broken his arm when

he walked in and slipped on it.

But I think you're doing
the smart thing, Harriet.

- I hope so.

I figure it's worth
trying, anyway.

- Let me know how it turns out.

- OK, Mary.

Goodbye.

- Yoohoo, Mr. Nelson!

- Oh, hi, Emmy Lou.

- I just had to stop
you, Mr. Nelson.

Be sure and go down to
the bijou this week.

They have a picture there
that is simply terrific.

- Oh, fine.
I'll get down and see it.

- Oh, it's so good.

It's a return engagement
of a rerelease

of a remake by special
request to the manager.

- I say, that sounds
pretty interesting.

What's the name of it?

- Farley Granger.

- Oh.

Yes, yes, that's a nice
name for a picture.

- Oh, it's such a wonderful
movie, Mr. Nelson.

Somebody ought to
make a book out of it.

It's about a man.

A man who was completely
irresponsible.

Oh, I just adore
irresponsible men.

And the woman in the picture,
she was irresponsible, too.

- Oh.

An irresponsible woman?

- What carefree
lovers they were.

They kissed on the street.

They kissed on the bus.

They kissed in crowded
railroad stations.

They wanted people
to see them kissing.

Even when the hero
took the heroine home,

he'd strike a match
so people could

see them kissing goodnight.

- Well, that's very
interesting, Emmylou.

Think I'd better get
down to the drug store.

- Oh, he was so romantic,
so unpredictable.

Toward the end of the picture,
he held the girl in his arms,

and everyone in
the theater thought

they were going to get married.

But they didn't.

He didn't even kiss her.

- Well, maybe he
ran out of matches.

- You should have seen it.

He wouldn't work, he was
undependable, he was fickle.

He had bad habits, he beat her.

He was irresponsible.

He didn't earn a living.

He borrowed money from her.

He stole, he lied, he gambled.

Gee, he was cute.

- Now, wait a minute.

You mean to say women actually
like a man of that type?

- Well, of course they do.

What fun is a man who does
exactly the same thing

every day?

What fun is it when you know
exactly when your husband is

coming home?

- Oh, that reminds me,
I'm late now, Emmy.

- It takes all the
joy out of life

to be married to a dull,
stodgy, conservative husband.

Women like thrills, excitement.

They like a man who's
impetuous, gay, devil-may-care.

- Watch your language, Emmy Lou.

- Be like a wild life
with an exciting man.

A man who does fantastically
imaginative, unpredictable

things.

I imagine you were like
that when you were young,

weren't you, Mr. Nelson?

- Oh.

Why, I mean, when I
was young, Emmy Lou.

Golly, I'm not so predictable.

I'm not set in my ways.

Nobody knows what
I'm going to do next.

Look at this necktie,
for instance.

See those ends?

One much longer than the other.

- How exciting.

Well, I don't want to
keep you, Mr. Nelson.

Where did you say
you were going?

- Down to the drugstore to get
a couple of quarts of ice cream.

- Oh yes, a quart of chocolate
and a quart of vanilla.

- That's where you're wrong.

I'm going to get three
quarts of tutti frutti.

Oh, Mr. Nelson, you're
so unpredictable.

- Ozzie and Harriet will
be back in just a moment.

- The average husband is a
pretty predictable fellow.

He comes down to breakfast at
the same time every morning,

drinks his orange juice,
picks up the morning paper,

eats a couple of eggs--

--drinks his coffee, and
hurries out the front door.

He then remembers
that he's forgotten

to kiss his wife goodbye,
hurries back into the house

and kisses her goodbye,
and hurries out again.

Ozzie Nelson, being
a typical husband,

has followed pretty close
to the pattern up until now.

But something tells me he's
liable to become unpredictable

any minute now.

- Three quarts of tutti frutti.

- Oh, Dave, have you
seen your father?

- No, I haven't, Mom.

- I wonder what's keeping him.

- Oh, Mr. Miller sometimes
runs out of vanilla.

Maybe Pop had to go to
a different drug store.

- Well, he should
be back by now.

He's always home at 6:00.

- You don't suppose
Pop had an accident?

- Oh, don't be silly, Ricky.

Pop wouldn't have an accident
on his bowling night.

- Well, he'd better hurry up.

I've got the roast set for 6:30.

- Oh, you know Pop.

He's never late for dinner.

Did you tell him about the rug?
- No, I haven't.

And don't you either.

I want to surprise him.

The man's coming from the
store to put the rug down

while your father's
bowling tonight.

So don't you tell him, now,
and spoil the surprise.

- That's pretty good.

How'd you think of that, Mom?

- Well, I don't
mess around, boy.

Ozzie?

- Hi, everybody.

- Oh, there you are.

I was beginning to
get worried about you.

- Oh, well, first of all, I
decided not to take the car.

I decided to walk down there.

And it turned out to be such
a beautiful, balmy, evening--

You know how
unpredictable I am--

Well, I decided to
walk home the long way.

So I went all the way down
to Brinkerhoff Street,

and then I strolled over
by Mount Vernon Street.

Then I came around
there by the park,

and then I turned down Maple
and went back to the drugstore.

- Why'd you go back
to the drugstore?

- The ice cream had melted.

- What kind of ice
cream is this, Pop?

- Oh, that's tutti frutti.

- What's tutti frutti?

- Well, it's ice cream
with pieces of fruity in it

and a lot of little
chunks of tutti all the--

- I'm not sure whether I'm
going to like tutti frutti.

- Well, you'd better like it.

If you don't eat your
tutti frutti ice cream,

you won't get any
dessert for dinner.

Didn't sound right.

Harriet, if the boys
don't eat their dessert,

what don't they get?

- They don't get any carrots.

- That sounds much
better, huh, Dave?

- I'll say.

- Let's sit down, dear.

I'll bring you a
glass of tomato juice.

- Oh, I don't think I'll have
any tomato juice tonight,

Harriet.

I think I'll have a glass
of champagne instead.

- Champagne?
- Yeah, don't you remember?

I bought us a bottle of
champagne for our anniversary.

- Oh, well, we used
that six months ago.

Don't you remember the
Dunkles and the Thornberrys

came over and
helped us celebrate?

- Oh yeah, that's right.
Yeah.

- I'll bring you a
glass of ginger ale.

The bubbles go up your
nose the same way.

- No, no, no.

That's OK I think I'll go
upstairs and change my clothes.

- Well, you look fine to me.

- Well, yes.

But you just mentioned
the Randolphs,

and it reminded me of
that wonderful time we had

at their New Year's Eve party.

Remember, we were
dressed formally

and I had on my tuxedo?

I thought I'd put it on
again now and sort of

relive it up a little.

I'm sorry to be
so unpredictable.

You just never know what I'm
going to do next, do you?

- Oh yes, I do.

You're going to hurry up,
because dinner's almost ready.

- OK.

I'll be right back.

Sure is nice of you to put up
with these crazy, changeable

moods of mine.

In fact, you know
what I think I'll

do right after I wash my hands?

- Can't imagine.

- I'm going to dry them on hers.

- I wonder what's come over Pop.

- Crazy, mixed up kid.

- Gee, I wonder what's
keeping Pop, Mom.

- Oh, he's getting
dressed for dinner.

- You mean he's
getting dressed up?

- That's right.
- How come?

- Oh, I don't know.

He had such a nice time at
the party last New Year's Eve

that he wants to wear
his tuxedo again.

I think it's a nice idea.

- He's going to look pretty
crazy down at the bowling

alley.

- Well, I'm sure he'll change
before he goes bowling.

You boys go ahead
and start eating.

- Harriet?

- Come on, dear.

Dinner's all ready.

- Harriet, have you seen
my cufflinks any place?

- For goodness sakes, where
did you get that outfit?

- Well, while I was upstairs
changing my clothes,

I suddenly remembered I'd
had an even better time

at the party at Halloween.

- I hope you don't
plan to sit down

to dinner in those awful rags.

- Oh, what do you mean?

This is a rather
formal outfit, Harriet.

I'm wearing a necktie.

How do you like it?

- And a pretty
crazy outfit, Pop.

- Yeah, this is
my casual outfit.

It's very nice for lounging
around the freight yards.

You just don't know what
I'm going to do next,

do you Harriet?

- No, but I know what
you're not going to do next.

You're not going to sit down to
dinner in those awful clothes.

- Oh, Harriet.

You heard me.

Hit the road, Beau.

- Funny thing when
a man can't even

be unpredictable
in his own home.

- Oh, Harriet, have you
seen my banjo any place?

- Your banjo?

I didn't even know you had one.

- Oh, yes.

I have an old banjo around here.

I thought I might strum
a few tunes this evening.

Doesn't that sound like fun?

- Well, aren't you
going bowling tonight?

- Oh, no, I don't think I'll go.

- Well, you've got to
go bowling tonight.

- Why?

- Well, because it's
your bowling night.

- Well, I suppose it
is my bowling night.

You know me, I'm so
moody and unpredictable--

- Oh look, you wouldn't
want to disappoint Thorny.

Now look, I've got all your
bowling things right down here.

You don't even have
to go upstairs.

Not go ahead.

- Darn family's
getting unpredictable.

- Hey, Oz.

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.
- What happened?

I thought you were
going to stop by for me.

- Oh, well, I'm a little late.
So what?

The guys can wait.
- Well, come on.

I told them we'd
be there at 8:00.

- Doggonit.
- What's the matter?

- I'll be right back.

I left my bowling
shoes in the house.

- Whoa.

That's the first time I've
ever seen a pair of shoes

that follow you out the door.

- What's going on
around here lately?

- Well, come on.
Let's go, Oz.

Hey, Oz.

Oz.

Do you know that guy?

- What guy?

- Well, the guy that's
coming toward us

with a body over his shoulder?

- Oh, excuse me, gentlemen.

Could you-- aren't
you Thornberry?

- Well, yeah, but I don't know--

- Don't you remember me?

Mulligan.

I was the other end man
at the Elks minstrel show.

- Oh, what do you know?

Sure, of course.

How are you?

This is Mr. Nelson.

- Yeah, I remember you.

You were the ringmaster in
the big circus number, too.

- Yeah, that's right.

- Frankly, the head of the show.

- Oh, go on.

It wasn't much.

- What are you doing in
this neck of the woods?

- I came over to
deliver this rug.

Some woman had to have
it put down tonight.

Her husband's a bonehead.

He don't like things
changed around.

- What's the name on it?

- Name's Nelson.

Say, do you happen to
know him, Mr. Nelson?

- Nelson?

Gee, we're the only
Nelsons on this block.

- Oh, well, then
you must be the--

No offense from what
I said, Mr. Nelson.

I didn't know you
were the bonehead.

- Hey, no wonder Harriet
was so anxious to get me out

of the house, Thorny.

She practically pushed me out.

- Pulled a fast one on you, huh?

- Yeah.

That's what she thinks.

- Well, I just thought
of a terrific gag

we could pull on her.

Would you care to
join us, Mr. Mulligan?

- Thanks.
I'd be glad to.

You better make mine
a short one, though.

You know, during working hours.

- No, no, no.

I mean in the gag.

Listen to this, see.

Harriet thinks she's going
to pull a real surprise.

She bought the rug, and I
didn't know anything about it.

Now, you fellas have
heard the old expression,

snug as a bug in a
rug, haven't you?

- Yeah.

- Here's my idea.

You and Thorny carry
the rug in, you see?

And you unroll it on
the living room floor.

- Ricky, give me
a hand with this.

- When's the man going to
get here with the rug, Mom?

- Oh, any minute now.

I'm glad he didn't
get here any earlier.

I had a tough time getting
your father out of the house.

Here, put that in
the dining room.

I want the floor as clear
as possible in here.

- Where do you want
this chair, Mom?

- Oh, put that in
the dining room, too.

- Gee, the dining
room's beginning

to look like the living room.

- Or the attic.

Where do you think you
are, Atlantic City?

- Come on, boy.
Chop chop.

- Just a minute.

- Oh, hello, Mr. Mulligan.

Yes, bring the
rug right in here.

Well, Thorny, what
are you doing?

- Well, I met Mulligan
outside and thought I'd

give them a hand with this rug.
They're pretty heavy sometimes.

- Oh, I'm sorry about making
you deliver it tonight,

Mr. Mulligan.
- That's all right.

I wasn't doing
anything in particular.

Just eating dinner.

- What makes the rug so lumpy?

- Oh, that.

Well, you see, well--

When they-- what does make the
rug so lumpy, Mr. Thornberry?

- Mothballs.

- Right.

It happens all the time.

If you'll just tell us where
you want it now, Mrs. Nelson,

we'll unroll it for you.
- Oh no, Mr. Mulligan.

Don't unroll it.

Just stand it over
there in the corner.

- Well, we can't stand
it in the corner.

I don't remember which
end is the head--

I mean, the top.

- I know, but Thorny, if
Ozzie doesn't like it,

Mr. Mulligan would just have to
come back again in the morning

and roll it up.

No, just throw it over
there in the corner

until I find out
how Ozzie likes it.

- Believe me, Harriet, he's
going to like it a lot better

unrolled.

- But he's such an
unpredictable person.

He may not even want a new rug.

- Aw, let them unroll it, Mom.

- Yeah, come on, Mom.

We want to see it.

- Well, all right.
Unroll it.

- OK, Mulligan.

Let's go.

- Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

I got to make my speech.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the wonder of the ages.

You are about to witness
the only time in history

that a man, cold sober,
mind you has been

rolled in his own living room.

Come on, Thorny.
Let's go.

- Heave ho.

- Surprise.

- How unpredictable.

- Aw, Harriet, don't you
think it'd be a nice idea

to tell the folks that
this is our last television

show until the
end of the summer,

but that we'll be back
September 18 for our same two

fine sponsors,
Hotpoint and Listerine?

And that in the
meantime, our place

will be very ably taken by a
wonderful show called "Summer

Theater," which is a series of
pictures especially designed

and produced for
television, and starring

some of our leading
motion picture actors?

- Yes, I do.

And I think it'd be a good
idea to tell them, too,

that Don DeFore is the
star of one of those plays.

- Oh.
- Hi, Harriet.

Hi, Oz.

- Hi, Thorny.

- Don DeFore...

Isn't that funny, that
the name rings a bell?

But I can't seem to--

Do you know anybody by the
name of Don DeFore, Thorny?

- Are you kidding, Oz?

That was my maiden name.

- Oh.

Oh, gosh.

Well, you may like the
rest of the series, folks.

- Why, you better.

- Oh, yes, the boys had to go
to a dance at the Y tonight,

and they said to
say goodbye, too.

- Oh, yes.

Well, I have a
wonderful idea, Thorny.

Why don't we go
over to your house

now and have something to eat?
- Well, wait a minute, Oz.

You sure you're hungry?

- Want it to be real nice.

Well, goodbye, folks.

We'll see you in the fall.

- Janet Waldo played
the part of Emmylou.

Mary Dunkle was Paula
Winslowe, and Herb Vigran

played the part of Mulligan.

Don't forget that a
completely different episode

of "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday
night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for
time and radio station.