Original subtitles

- Hotpoint quality appliances presents

America's favorite family comedy, "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet," starring the entire Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet, David, and Ricky.

So settle back in your easy chairs

and enjoy another delightful half hour with all the Nelsons.

Ozzie Nelson, of course, plays the part

of the head of the Nelson household, Ozzie.

And here's his lovely wife Harriet

Nelson who keeps the family on an even keel.

Hello, Harriet.

The smiling, young teenager we now see

is David Nelson, older of the two Nelson boys

and played by David Nelson.

And here, we have the youngest of the Nelsons,

the little guy with the twinkle in his eye,

Ricky Nelson, played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelson's next door neighbor, Mr. Thornberry,

better known as Ozzie's pal Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- We're ready for breakfast now, mom.

- Well, and to what do we owe this pleasant surprise?

- We're having a special assembly at school today.

- Oh, good for you.

- Us too, mom.

We're having a special program about George Washington.

We'll probably miss all of our morning classes.

- Good old George Washington.

- Well, I can see why he'd be a popular guy today.

- We don't have to go to school at all on Monday.

- Yes, I know.

- I sure wish he had more birthdays, boy.

- Well, when you get a little older,

you'll be thankful that birthdays only

come once a year.

- Did I hear somebody mention a birthday?

- Yeah, Monday.

Don't tell me you've forgotten.

- Somebody's birthday on Monday?

Let's see, Harriet, yours is July.

David is October.

- You want a hint?

- No, no, no, no, wait a minute.

I'm usually pretty good at this.

I can certainly remember a birthday without a hint.

Gee.

OK, give me just a small hint.

- His name is George Washington.

- Oh!

I didn't think I'd forgotten a birthday.

- You forgot his.

- Well, I wasn't thinking about him.

- He was a good man, boy.

- Yeah, I know he was.

- We're having a special assembly about him today.

We're even getting out of school early.

- Oh, good.

- Good old George Washington.

- Well, here's your breakfast.

You better eat it or you'll be late.

- Yeah, I don't want to be late for getting out

of school early.

- Uh, Harriet, I don't think I'm having breakfast.

I think I'll just have orange juice.

Thorny's going to stop by for me in a couple of minutes.

- Oh, all right, dear.

Hey, listen, I want you to be very careful of that corner

at the foot of Maple Avenue.

There was another accident there last night.

- Oh?

- Look, it's right here on the front page of the paper.

You know, I think it's terrible they don't have a traffic

light there. - Oh, yeah.

- Let me see, pa.

- Oh, yeah, look at those fenders.

- Yeah, they were fenders.

Boy, it's lucky nobody was hurt.

- I want you boys to be very careful when you're crossing

the street down there, too.

- Oh, we always are, mom.

- I almost had an accident at that corner last night.

Some woman came zooming right out in front of me.

- Are you sure it was a woman?

- Oh, yeah, she came barreling right across in front of me

as if she owned the road or something.

- Who was it, pop, the mayor's wife?

- I don't know.

All I know is if I hadn't jammed on my brakes in a hurry,

we'd had a nice smashup.

- Is it true that women make the worst drivers, pop?

- Oh, no, no, I wouldn't say that, David.

I mean, women are much better drivers than small children.

- Now, wait a minute, I resemble that remark.

I'm a woman, you know, and I feel a little hurt.

- What about me?

I'm a small child.

- Well, after all, the issue isn't

to determine who's the better driver,

it's to see if we can't do something

about that dangerous intersection

so we don't keep having those accidents there.

- Well, it's no wonder they have accidents.

It's almost impossible to see the other cars

until you're practically at the corner.

It's not always the driver's fault.

- I guess that's what our teacher means.

- What's that?

- Well, he says most accidents are

caused by the nut at the steering wheel.

- That sounds like your teacher's been

reading some old joke books.

- Dan dan dandy.

- They're having a women's club meeting there.

I think I'll try and do something about it.

Maybe have a traffic signal put in there.

- How can you do that, mom?

- Well, I don't know, David, but maybe somebody

will have some ideas.

- Only thing to do is get to somebody

with some authority, somebody with some influence.

- You mean like Ms. Wingate, my homeroom teacher?

- Does she have influence?

- I'll say.

When she says stay after school, you stay.

- With all respect to Mrs. Wingate,

that's not the kind of influence I mean.

I mean somebody with some political influence.

You need somebody like that on your side.

- I'm glad I got Ms. Wingate on my side.

She makes out our report cards, too.

- You better hurry up with your breakfast.

You're going to find yourself off her list.

- Yeah.

Besides, you don't want to keep old George waiting.

- I wonder what he would have done in a case like this.

- You mean about the traffic light?

- Yes, sir.

- Well, I'm sure he'd have done something about it, David.

He was a great man.

No problem was so small that he could afford to overlook it.

- Well, it seems to me that none of us

can afford to overlook a thing like this.

- I don't think George Washington would have

worried about a traffic light.

- Oh, what makes you so sure?

- He didn't have automobiles in those days.

- I'll think of an answer to that

and let you know when I come home tonight.

- Hi, pop.

- Oh, hi, fellas.

- Hey, mom, pop's home.

- Well, that's quite a greeting.

What's all the excitement about?

- We're having dinner early.

We're playing a basketball game tonight.

- Oh, good for you.

- Oh, hello, dear. - Oh, hi.

- I'm glad you're home.

The boys and I had dinner early. - Yeah, I know.

They told me. Well, that suits me fine.

I had kind of a busy day.

- Oh, so did I. We had quite a session at the women's club.

- Oh, really?

Did you speak to them about the traffic signal idea?

- Yes, sir, I did and it was received very enthusiastically.

- Oh, swell.

Was any definite action taken? - Mm-hmm.

I've been appointed a committee of one

to write a letter to the president

of the Chamber of Commerce.

- Well, OK, let's get out the old pencil and paper.

- Oh, well, thank you, dear, but I've already written it.

- Oh, good for you.

- I wrote it during the treasurer's report

and mailed it right after the meeting.

I figured the sooner the better.

In fact, I sent it special delivery.

- Oh, well, that's fine.

Now, if you don't mind my making a suggestion,

I'd follow it right up.

- In what way?

- Well, I'd go down and see the main guy personally.

- Oh, I wouldn't want to do that.

- Well, why not?

That's the only way you're going to get any real action.

Find out who the main guy is and go down there

and contact him personally.

- That's what I need to do tonight.

- Oh, what's this?

- I'm going right up to Officer Clancy

and get some real action.

- What are you going to do, step on his toes?

- Now wait a minute, who's this you're going to see tonight?

- Officer Clancy.

He's a policeman.

- Oh, well, how come you know him so well?

- He referees all the basketball games at the Y.

- Oh, he sounds like a real nice guy.

- Oh, he is.

- I need to tell him about that traffic

light we were talking about.

- Well, good luck to you.

- What do you mean?

- Well, he's a nice man, but what can he do?

- Are you kidding?

- Are you kidding?

- Am I kidding?

Are you kidding "am I kidding"?

- Now, wait a minute, boys, I must

admit that installing a traffic light

is probably a little out of Officer Clancy's jurisdiction,

but it certainly won't do any harm for Ricky

to talk to him about it.

- Do you think he has any influence, pop?

- Well, you never can tell.

- He knows a lot of people, boy.

- We're sure he does, dear.

- He told me he's seen them come and he's seen them go.

- I bet he has.

- In fact, he said he's sent some of them himself.

- I wouldn't doubt that either.

You know, I think it's wonderful the way you've all

gotten together on this thing.

And that's the way to accomplish something, everybody

work together.

- You know, I may be too optimistic,

but I think that letter of mine might do the trick.

- Well, you know, I've just been thinking

it might not be a bad idea if I took a little trip down

to city hall and had a talk with somebody in charge down there.

- Don't worry, pop, Officer Clancy

can take care of everything.

- Oh, Ricky, stop talking like a moron.

- "Moron," he says.

Big man, terrific IQ.

- That's what I like to see, everybody working together.

- Well, sure, I'm here from 9 til 5.

Yeah.

Would you like to sit down?

Huh?

Well, OK, then, Mabel.

Yeah, I'll talk to you later.

Bye.

Now, may I help you, sir?

- Yes, this is the Office of the Commissioner of Public Safety,

isn't it? - Well, yes, it is.

- Well, I'd like to see the commissioner, please.

- Well, I'm sorry, but he's in conference right now.

Do you have an appointment?

- Oh, no, I don't.

Is that, uh, necessary?

- Oh, I'm afraid it is.

The commissioner only sees people by appointment.

- Oh, yes.

Well I'd like to make an appointment then

at his earliest convenience.

- Oh, well, certainly.

Just let me take a look here and see what day he has open.

- I realize he's a very busy man, but a lot of people

are quite concerned.

- How about a week from Monday?

- Oh, uh, you couldn't make it a little earlier than that?

- Well, he might be able to squeeze you in next Thursday

while he's getting his haircut.

- Really, this is a matter of some urgency

and I was hoping I could see him a little sooner than that.

- Well, I'm sorry.

That's the earliest appointment I can arrange.

His calendar's all filled until then.

Perhaps I can help you.

Would you like to tell me what you'd

like to see the commissioner about,

and then I could relay the message to him?

- Uh, well, I suppose.

Although as I say, this is a matter of considerable urgency.

You're sure I couldn't just squeeze in to see him

for just five minutes?

That's all of his time I need.

- No, I'm awfully sorry, but like I say,

he's in a very important conference.

- Yes.

- Hello?

Who?

John, how wonderful to hear from you.

Oh, really, John?

Oh, Bob, for goodness sake!

- How is it?

- Fine.

- Oh, that's good.

- Say, can I call you back in a couple of minutes?

I'm sort of busy right now.

Mm-hmm.

OK, bye.

Sorry to keep you waiting, sir.

Now, what was your problem?

- Oh, uh, well, are you familiar with the intersection

at Highland and Maple?

- Oh, yes, I know the corner you mean.

- Well, there have been quite a few traffic accidents

there recently.

Nothing serious, but minor things

such as fender abrasions and things of that sort.

And I thought if I spoke to the commissioner,

he might be able to arrange to have a traffic signal put there

before something serious really occurred.

- A traffic light at the corner--

- At Maple and Highland.

- Maple and Highland.

- Yeah.

- Well, I'll certainly see that this

is brought to the commissioner's attention.

I'm sure you'll get some quick action.

- Oh, well, fine.

Of course, I don't expect it will be installed

tonight or tomorrow morning.

- Oh, it's not impossible.

The commissioner is a pretty fast worker

on matters of this sort.

- Then you will definitely bring it to his attention, won't you?

- Oh, yes, yes, I will.

- Fine.

Well, thanks a lot.

- You're welcome.

Hello?

Who?

George, how wonderful to hear from you!

- Ozzie and Harriet will be back in just a moment.

- Hiya, Thorny.

- Well, hi, Oz.

Where have you been?

- Down at the city hall wasting time.

- Well, isn't that what the city hall's for?

- I spent about two hours down there.

- Yeah, I know how it is.

I've got a few traffic tickets myself.

- No, no, no, nothing like that, Thorny.

I decided to make myself a one-man committee

and see if I could get a traffic light installed

at that dangerous intersection at Maple and Highland.

- Well, good for you, Oz.

It's high time some public-spirited citizens

did something about that.

- Yeah, but unfortunately I accomplished

absolutely nothing.

I got as far as the secretary, and she told me

that the commissioner was in a conference.

But between you and me, I could have

sworn I heard somebody say, "I'll

raise you five" from the back room.

- Well, just the same.

You sure got some quick results.

- I didn't get any results at all.

The girl said she'd speak to him about it,

but you know that's the usual routine.

- What do you mean?

- I mean I just wasted my time.

- Well, it may interest you to know that I passed there

not more than 10 minutes ago and saw a workman erecting traffic

lights.

- You're kidding?

- Well, no, Oz, honest.

Didn't you see it on the way home?

- No, I took the bus.

- Oh, well, come on, we'll drive over.

You can see for yourself.

- Well, how about that?

I really got some quick action, didn't I?

- Well, you sure did.

- You know, Thorny, it just goes to show you,

for years, people have been saying, "Let's have a traffic

light installed at that dangerous intersection,"

but it took me to go down there and get some real action.

- Ah, just a minute, Oz, I'm beginning to hate myself now

for even telling you about it.

- Well, in other lesson, people say,

who did that magnificent public-spirited job?

You tell them it was your neighbor and friend, Ozzie

Nelson. - Sure, sure, Oz.

And when the light has traffic tied up for blocks,

we'll erect a little sign, You are

late for work this morning through

the courtesy of Ozzie Nelson."

- It's not going to tie up anything, Thorny.

It's going to straighten out all that chaos that's

been existing down there.

- Well, I suppose.

But in a way, I'm going to miss the old excitement.

You know, it was one of those corners where you never knew

who you were going to run into.

- Hey, David...

I told you, boy.

- You told me what?

- Remember I told you.

- You told me what?

- About the traffic light.

- What about the traffic light?

- You said it wouldn't do any good to ask Mr. Clancy.

- Ask him what?

- About putting in a traffic light.

- What about it?

- They're putting it up right now.

- You mean down at Highland and Maple?

- Well, sure.

How many times do I have to tell you, David?

- Boy, it sure didn't take them very long, did it?

- Heck, no.

I don't mess around, boy.

You should go down and look at my traffic light.

- Your traffic light?

- Oh, sure.

I'm the guy who got it put there.

- Oh, good for you.

Congratulations, little man.

- Why don't you have the neighborhood take up

a collection for me?

- Better get ready for dinner, boys.

- Hey, mom, did you hear what I did?

- No, I didn't.

- Well, wait til you hear about it.

- Well, why don't you wash your hands and tell us at dinner?

And then your father can hear about it, too.

- OK. Come on, David.

- OK, I'll be right with you.

Hey, mom, I want to tell you something, but don't Ricky now.

- Oh, what's the big secret?

- Well, Ricky saw some guys putting in a traffic light

at the corner of Highland and Maple.

- Are they putting it in already?

- Yes, ma'am, and he thinks it's because he

told Mr. Clancy about the dangerous corner.

- Oh, I see.

- Yeah, but I know what really happened.

- Yes, I know you do.

- I didn't have the heart to tell Ricky.

- That's very thoughtful of you, dear.

I'm glad you didn't.

The important thing is that the light got put in.

- Yeah, that's what I figured.

That's the reason I let him go right on thinking

he was responsible.

- I didn't realize how much could be accomplished just

by writing a letter.

- Gee, how did you know, mom?

- How'd I know what?

- That we wrote a letter to the mayor.

Our whole class signed it.

- What?

- Yesterday.

I told our teacher about the dangerous corner,

and she said we ought to try to do something about it.

- So you sent a letter to the mayor?

- Yes, ma'am.

But don't say anything to Ricky now, mom.

- Oh, of course not.

- Let him go right on thinking he was responsible.

- All right, dear, if you say so.

- Oh, Harriet.

- Hello, dear.

Say, I have some news for you.

- Uh, don't tell me. Let me guess.

- Oh, I can tell from that glint in your eye

that you've already heard about it.

- So you mean about the traffic light?

- Uh huh.

It was really fast action, wasn't it?

- Yeah, it sure was.

Just goes to show you what can be

done with a little determination and public spirit.

- Well, thank you, dear.

- Oh...

You're welcome..

- I don't know why I'm taking the bows.

You're the one who's responsible for the whole thing.

- Oh, well, thanks.

I really didn't do so much.

- Well, if it weren't for you, it never

would have gotten done.

- Oh, very nice of you to say so.

- Well, it's the truth.

After all, you're the one who gave me

the idea to write the letter.

- What's this again?

- You're the one who gave me the idea

to write a letter to the Chamber of Commerce.

- Oh, and you mean that's how come the traffic light got

installed?

- Well, of course.

- Oh, this is marvelous.

- I wouldn't say "marvelous."

Any one of the girls could have done the same thing.

- Uh, Harriet, it's lucky you happen

to have a very good sense of humor,

because I have news for you, dear.

- Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt you, dear, but whatever you do,

don't say anything about the traffic light

to David or Ricky.

- Well, why not?

- Well, David did a very generous thing.

It seems that last night at the basketball game,

Ricky spoke to Officer Clancy about putting the traffic light

in.

- Oh, so he thinks he was responsible for it?

- Yes, but that's not all.

David spoke to his school teacher about it,

and the whole class sent a letter to the mayor,

so David thinks that he's responsible for it.

- Oh, and yet David let Ricky think that Officer Clancy--

Say, that's very nice of David.

Very thoughtful.

- I thought so, too.

So naturally, I didn't have the heart

to remind David about my letter to the Chamber of Commerce.

- Oh, well, gee, that was very thoughtful of you too, dear,

to let David think that he did it.

- I figured I can certainly be as generous as my own son.

- Oh.

- I'm sorry, I interrupted you before.

You said you had some news for me.

- Oh, it wasn't important.

- Well, don't forget now, don't mention this to David or Ricky,

huh? - No, I-- I--

I promise.

- As long as each of them thinks he's responsible for it,

there's no sense in spoiling their fun.

- Oh, oh, sure, that's right.

Uh, do you happen to know where Sidney is?

- Sidney?

- Yeah, you know, the Thornberry's dog.

- Oh, well, I think he's out back in his doghouse.

Why?

- Well, I'm sure he had nothing to do with the traffic light,

so there's a little something I'd like to tell him.

I'll, uh, I'll be right back, dear.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

- Did you just get home?

- Yeah, just put the car away this minute.

- You're looking pretty self-satisfied.

Did you inherit some money or something?

- No, it's just the mellow feeling that

follows a generous gesture.

We had quite a round robin at our house.

- Yeah, how so?

- Well, it's that new traffic light on Highland and Maple.

Yeah?

- See, it seems that Ricky knows a police officer named Clancy

and he told him about it, so now Ricky

thinks that he was responsible for having the light installed.

And now, wait a minute.

And David and his class in school

wrote a letter to the mayor, so David's sure

that he was the one responsible.

And Harriet wrote a letter to the Chamber of Commerce,

so she's sure that she was the one responsible for it.

- Boy, it sounds confusing to me.

- Yeah, so naturally, I didn't have the heart

to tell him who was really responsible.

- Well, I'm glad you didn't, Oz.

I'm perfectly content to remain unheralded.

My reward is just knowing that my action was

another step in public safety.

- Uh, just a second, Thorny, you know

darn well who was responsible for getting

the light installed.

- Certainly, Oz, and I accept your thanks, believe me.

- Now wait a minute, don't tell me

you're going to start taking credit for it.

- Well, I say give credit where credit is due.

I hate to disappoint you, old man,

but Catherine has reminded me of something very interesting.

- Such as what?

- Well, it seems a couple of weeks ago,

I talked to her cousin and I happened

to mention at that time that we needed a traffic

signal at Highland and Maple.

- Well, so what?

- Well, Catherine's cousin makes traffic signals.

That his business.

So obviously, my talk with him was

responsible for the whole thing.

- Well, I thought Catherine's cousin had

an electrical appliance shop.

- Well, yes, yes, he does.

- And he also makes traffic signals?

- Oh, now, look, Oz, I didn't mean

to give the impression that he makes the whole signal.

Please don't misunderstand me.

He makes the light bulbs that they put into the signal.

- Thorny, you know darn well he had nothing to do with it.

I was the one who went down to see the commissioner.

- You mean you spoke to his secretary.

- Yes, and she promised to speak to him

and she obviously did because the light was installed.

And if you don't mind, I'll take the bows for it.

- Oh, no, no, no, Oz, I beg to differ with you.

Catherine's cousin knows quite a few influential people.

- Oh, sure, like the guy who paints the traffic lights,

and the guy who sells the paint to the guy who paints them?

- Oh, if there's anything I hate, it's a sore loser.

- If there's anything I can't stand,

it's the guy who takes credit for something

he had nothing to do with.

- Pardon me.

Do either of you gentlemen own a car

with license number 7M32048?

- Well, yes, I do, officer.

Is something wrong?

- Well, I tried to flag you down there,

but I guess you didn't see me, and I took out after you

and lost you in the traffic.

- Oh, well, I'm sorry.

Did I do something wrong?

- You drove through a red light.

- A red light?

Well, I didn't even see it.

- Yeah, back there at Highland and Maple.

- Highland and Maple?

- Yeah, we just put it in.

We've needed a signal at that intersection for a long time.

May I see your driver's license please?

- Oh, yes, yes, of course.

Gee, it's a fine place to put a traffic light.

I mean, I'm used to driving right through there.

- Yes, I know.

We've nailed quite a few people today.

- Gee, a person should get some sort of a warning.

Thorny, I ought to make you pay this fine.

You're the one who's responsible for getting

that light put up there. - Who, me?

- Of course, you.

- Oh, I had nothing to do with it.

You were the one who talked to the commissioner of safety.

- I only spoke to his secretary.

- I think it's a very nice traffic light myself.

It's high time we had one too.

- Oh, Oz, I think we can blame this whole thing on Ricky.

- Look, don't try to weasel out of it, Thorny.

If you hadn't spoken to your cousin

with all his influence and all.

- I'm not trying to weasel out of anything.

And he's not my cousin, he's Catherine's, and I'm

sure he doesn't know anything about it.

- Please try and be a little more careful

next time, Mr. Nelson.

- Well, aren't you got to give me a ticket?

- Oh, now, that's a great question to ask.

- No, I'm going to let you off with a warning this time.

- Oh, gee, thanks a lot, officer.

I really had no intention of driving through.

It was completely accidental.

- I understand.

Don't you think it's a good place to have one though?

I mean, that's a very dangerous corner.

- Right, you're absolutely right.

Thanks again, officer.

- Well, that's OK.

Uh, and give my regards to Ricky.

- Ricky?

- Yeah, tell him Officer Clancy said, hello.

Better get back.

- Have a good day, Officer Clancy.

- Ozzie and Harriet will be back in just a moment.

- Hi, Rick.

- Oh, hi, dad.

- How'd the basketball game go last night?

- Oh, swell.

Hey, I didn't know you knew Officer Clancy.

- Officer Clancy?

Uh, why, why do you say that?

- Well, he told me to say, hello, to you.

He sure is a nice man.

- Uh, wait a minute, Rick, what else did he say?

- Nothing.

He just said, give my regards to your dad.

- Oh, yeah, see, he sure is a nice man.

Very considerate.

Very nice man.

- Don't forget that a completely different episode

of "The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for time and radio station.

Next week, "The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

will be brought to you by Prophylactic toothbrushes,

Listerine toothpaste, and Listerine, the most widely

used antiseptic in the world.

Janet Waldo was the receptionist.

The police officer was played by Frank James.

- Ladies and gentlemen, at this very moment in Korea,

the lives of soldiers wounded in battle today

are being saved by transfusions of blood and blood plasma.

You can give these men the gift of life, a pint of your blood.

The Department of Defense is calling for all Americans

to roll up their sleeves.

There is no substitute for blood.

The need is urgent.

The need is now.

Call your local Red Cross chapter or blood donor center

for an appointment, and please keep it.