Original subtitles

- Hotpoint Quality Appliances presents

America's favorite family comedy,

"The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And, of course, his lovely wife Harriet as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys, David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother, the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelsons' next-door neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- Good morning, dear. - Good morning.

- Your toast will be ready in a minute.

How would you like your eggs?

- Uh, no thanks.

- Maybe I worded that question wrong.

- No, no, the question was fine.

It's just I don't think I'll have any eggs this morning.

- Oh, would you like some cereal with fruit on top?

- Uh, no, I don't think so.

- What is this?

Are you on a diet all of a sudden?

- No, it's just that I ate so much turkey

at your Aunt Ellen's yesterday, I'm still full.

- Well, you certainly made Aunt Ellen happy.

- Oh, that's good.

Did you notice the expression on her face

when I asked for that third helping?

Boy, she was grinning from ear to ear.

- Is that what you're laughing at?

- No, I was thinking about the expression on your face

when the top button popped off your pants.

- Oh.

Well, you know, Thanksgiving only comes once a year,

and people like to have you enjoy their cooking.

Boy, that was a big turkey, wasn't it?

- It sure was.

Are you sure you don't want anything for breakfast?

- No, no, honestly.

I know this is hard to believe, but I

don't think I'll have anything more

to eat for about two days, especially turkey.

- OK, suit yourself.

- Is breakfast ready yet, Mom?

- Your oatmeal will be ready in a minute, dear.

- Oh, are those oranges you've got there, Harriet?

- Uh huh.

- Well, I think I will have just a small glass of orange juice.

- Is that all you're going to have, Pop?

- Yes, Dave.

Your old dad had so much Thanksgiving turkey

at Aunt Ellen's yesterday, I'm still full.

- Yeah, you sure can't eat, Pop.

- Well, it's like I was telling your mother,

Thanksgiving only comes once a year,

we might as well make the most of it.

- I did my share, too.

- I should say you did.

You ate plenty.

- In fact, I'm still full.

- I can imagine.

- Mom?

- Yes, dear?

- I don't have room for my oatmeal.

- What, dear?

- Say, that's neat a idea.

Neither do I, Mom.

- Now, wait a minute, you two. - No, no.

Just a second, Harriet.

If the boys are too full to eat their breakfast,

I don't think we ought to force them.

- Well, they have to eat something.

- Oh, how about some orange juice?

That's what Pop's having.

- Yeah, me too. - Is that all?

Just orange juice? - Yes, ma'am.

- Yes, ma'am.

- Oh, now that's no way to grow up

to be big strong boys with big strong muscles.

- OK, Mom, then let me squeeze mine.

- Never mind, Hercules.

- Boy, that sure was a big turkey we had yesterday,

wasn't it, Pop? - Yeah, it sure was.

- Sure was.

Boy, that was the biggest turkey I ever saw.

- Oh, you boys remember to thank Aunt Ellen in case

you see her today.

She spent the whole day yesterday

fixing that meal you guys devoured so fast.

- Well, it's like I said.

When people eat hearty, the cook always gets a big boot out

of it.

- She must have felt like Bob Waterfield yesterday.

- Well, here's your breakfast.

Skol.

- Cheers.

- Ah, boy, that was delicious.

- Can we have turkey for supper, Mom?

- Oh, David, please.

Don't mention turkey for at least two weeks.

- Why don't you guys waddle outside for a while?

- OK, Mom. Come on.

Let's go, Rick.

- Well, all finished with the breakfast dishes.

- Good for you.

- All I have to worry about is what

we're going to have for dinner tonight.

- Well, why worry about it?

- That's the trouble with having Thanksgiving dinner out.

You never have any leftovers for the next night.

- Well, personally, that suits me fine.

Now we don't have to eat turkey in various disguised forms

for the rest of the week.

- Say, listen to this.

This sounds like a delicious recipe.

An interesting way of preparing veal.

- Oh, no, no.

Harriet, please, not now.

- I just thought I'd get your reaction.

- Well, I know, but the thought of turkey is bad enough,

but if there's one food I can gladly bypass, it's veal.

- I thought you were the guy who liked everything.

- Well, yes, I do, most everything,

but everybody's entitled to a couple of special dislikes.

- What are you looking for?

- My hammer.

- Oh, I was only kidding, dear.

Honest.

- I just thought I'd rake a few of these leaves

off the front lawn.

- If you do it with a hammer, you

ought to be finished by the 4th of July.

- I'm about to fix the rake.

It broke on that heavy load I raked last month.

Where is that darn thing?

- Hey, listen to this.

"Various ways of whipping turkey leftovers

into delicious appetizing meals."

- Here's a hammer, but it's a little small.

- Are you listening, dear?

Maybe I can stop over to Aunt Ellen's and get

some of her leftover turkey.

- Oh, Harriet, please.

I told you before, I've had enough turkey to last me

until Christmas, at least.

- I know, but some of these recipes sounds so good.

Just listen to this one for turkey upside-down pudding.

- Don't worry.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner.

But after every Thanksgiving, why do we

have nothing but turkey, turkey, turkey?

- Oh, be careful.

My table.

- Oh, well, it's only a small hammer.

- Well, just the same.

In case you feel a lecture coming on,

you'd better let me hold it. - No, no.

I have no intention of delivering a lecture.

But, golly, it's just that--

Here, take the hammer.

What's the matter with people?

After sitting down to a delicious Thanksgiving dinner,

the family seated around the table,

a nice big, juicy turkey, and then they

have to spoil the memory of this beautiful occasion

by stuffing themselves with turkey

for the rest of the week!

- Well, don't look at me.

- I mean, the whole thing is ridiculous.

For a full week after Thanksgiving, every meal,

what do people have?

Nothing but turkey, turkey, turkey!

Be careful of the hammer.

- I'm sorry, dear.

I lost my head.

Did you know there's another point there?

You can't expect people to just throw away good food.

- Well, I know, but they could put it

in the refrigerator and kind of skip it around.

They don't have to have it every day in the week.

- Well, that still doesn't solve my problem what

to have for dinner tonight.

- I think I'll go out and rake up some leaves.

- Oh, that would be nice.

I'll get some French dressing.

We'll have a lovely salad.

Oak leaf salad.

- Say, that sounds delicious.

- Well, that settles it then.

Tonight, let us have some leaves.

- Uh, no, I have a better idea.

Leave us have some lettuce.

- Oh.

- No, no, no!

Careful.

I have a very soft head.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh!

Thorny, for goodness sakes!

Break a guy's thumb that way.

- Working hard?

- Yeah, just trying to fix this rake.

- Well, you'll never do it with that small hammer,

or is that the idea?

- No, I just--

Holy Hera!

What is that, an Indian war club?

- It's a drumstick.

Here, have a bite.

- Oh, no thanks.

Didn't you have enough turkey yesterday?

- Well, certainly, Oz, but today's another day.

You know, Thanksgiving dinner is really a glorious meal,

but what I really live for is that follow-up.

Boy, there's nothing like cold turkey the day after.

- Well, personally, you can have my share.

I like turkey as well as the next guy,

but the same thing day after day gets pretty monotonous.

- Oh, yeah, Oz, but you've got the wrong-- oh!

Sorry, Oz.

But you've got the wrong idea.

There are dozens of interesting ways of fixing turkey

leftovers. There's turkey--

- Yes, yes, I know all of them.

There's turkey surprise.

There's turkey upside-down cake.

There's turkey pudding.

And turkey with whipped cream on it.

- Say, that last sounds pretty good.

I'll have to get Catherine to fix that.

Yep, Oz, this is my favorite week of the year.

We have turkey sandwiches, turkey salad, turkey fricassee.

- Please, Thorny.

- Kind of making you hungry, Oz?

Have a bite.

- No, no, no thanks.

Besides, you've eaten most of the meat off it.

Nothing but skin here.

How'd you manage that?

Looks like an inside job assignment.

- I tell you, Oz, there's nothing

like dipping into the old icebox and coming up

with a turkey leg or a couple of slices of white meat.

Boy, what sandwiches you can make.

A couple of luscious slabs on whole wheat bread.

- With Thousand Island dressing, and perhaps a little

lettuce, and a slice of tomato?

- Atta boy, Oz.

I knew you were kidding all the time.

Boy, I bet you go for that cold turkey as well

as the rest of them.

- Don't wave that baseball bat in front of my face, Thorny.

- Well, I'll bet Harriet there's some terrific recipes

for cold turkey leftovers.

Say, what is she having for tonight?

- Well, as a matter of fact--

- Oh, wait.

Let me see if I can guess.

Turkey hash or a turkey fricassee?

Or a Turkey salad, maybe?

- No, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Turkey--

I mean, Thorny, but actually, we don't have a sliver

of turkey in the house.

- Boy, what an appetite you must have, Oz.

- No, no, no.

It's nothing like that.

It's just that we had Thanksgiving dinner

over at Harriet's aunt's, and naturally the person

who buys the turkey is entitled to the turkey leftovers.

- Oh, gee, Oz. I'm sorry.

Here. Please have a bite.

- No, no, that's all right.

Save your sympathies, Thorn.

It's OK. - All right.

I think I'll be running along. I'll see you later.

- Oh, uh, Thorny? - Yeah?

- Uh, on second thought, are you absolutely sure you're

finished with this turkey leg?

- Oh, sure, Oz!

Sure!

I knew you were kidding with all that silly stuff.

And there's a very nice morsel right down there

on the far end.

It's all yours, with my compliments.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

- Hey, wait a minute, Oz!

What are you doing?

- I'm fixing the rake.

It's just like you say, there's no limit

to what you can do with Thanksgiving leftovers.

- Hello?

- Hello, dear.

This is Aunt Ellen.

- Oh, hello, Aunt Ellen.

Have you fully recovered from the feast yesterday?

- Oh, yes.

I've been meaning to talk to you, though.

- What's the matter?

Did Ozzie eat too much?

- Oh, my goodness, no.

In fact, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.

- Well, don't tell me he didn't eat enough.

- Well, I wouldn't say that.

But somehow there's quite a bit of leftover turkey

in the icebox, and I can't imagine

what I was thinking of not to insist

that you folks take some home with you.

- Oh, thanks very much, Aunt Ellen,

but I'm sure you could use it.

- Now, dear, there's plenty here.

- Well, as a matter of fact, Ozzie and the boys

ate so much yesterday, they seem to have lost their appetite.

In fact, I don't think they'll eat again for a week.

- Well, you can't mean that about Ozzie.

- I'm afraid I do.

He says he doesn't want to see another turkey until Christmas.

Oh, my goodness.

- What's the matter?

- Well, nothing serious, but I have

a suspicion that that leftover turkey is

going to come in mighty handy.

- Well, what happened all of a sudden?

- Well, I just realized that today,

it's my turn to entertain the Bridge Club.

- When did you discover that?

- Just this very moment, when Sarah Henderson

rang the doorbell.

She's on the front porch now.

- Oh, my goodness. You'd better get busy.

- Yes.

Well, you're sure you don't want any of the turkey?

- No, thank you, Aunt Ellen.

Oh, on second thought, maybe I'd better, just in case

Ozzie should change his mind.

It'd be terrible if he--

- Well, it's been lovely chatting with you, dear.

Goodbye.

- Hiya, Pop.

- Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hello, boys.

- Is that the new monster comic?

- No.

It's just one of your mother's magazines.

- Boy, look at this picture.

- Golly.

- "Try this delicious way of serving turkey leftovers."

- It looks delicious, too, doesn't it?

- Let's try it, boy.

- Hey, that looks like the dish Mrs. Thornberry makes.

- Oh, are the Thornberrys still having turkey?

- Sure.

- They even had it for breakfast.

- They're going to have turkey every day for a week.

- Will was eating some turkey in the backyard this morning.

Boy, it made me hungry.

- Well, he offered you a piece.

Why didn't you take it?

- Heck, who wants that part?

- Right now, I'd take any part.

Where are you going, Pop?

- Just over here.

Thought I'd have a look in the refrigerator.

- You're going to get something to eat?

- Well, as long as I'm here in the kitchen anyway,

I might scrape a little something together.

What's going on here?

- Oh, hi, dear.

The boys are a little hungry.

- Well, I kind of figured you'd be

home early after that light breakfast.

- Can I have a sandwich, Mom?

- Me too, Mom, a nice big one with food in it.

- Well, they usually make the best kind.

How does a nice peanut butter and jelly sound?

Or a nice tuna fish sandwich?

How's that sound?

- See how a nice turkey sandwich would sound.

- We don't have turkey, Rick.

- Well, gee, the Thornberrys are eating turkey three times

a day.

- Will even eats it between meals.

- Well, fellas, I'm awfully sorry, but don't you remember?

We had dinner at Aunt Ellen's yesterday,

and she's using all of her turkey leftovers for guests

today. - What?

Do you mean somebody else is going to eat our turkey?

- There's a bridge club meeting at her house today.

- Well, I know, but I thought you

said you were going to get some turkey leftovers from your Aunt

Ellen.

- I thought you said you didn't want to see

any turkey until Christmas.

- Well, I know, but the boys said--

Well, I mean some nice sliced turkey would just hit the spot,

the boys said.

- What are you guys whispering about?

- Oh, nothing, Pop.

- Well, that's not polite.

I can't hear what you're planning.

- I think I'll go outside for a while.

- Me, too. - Hey, wait a minute.

I thought you guys said you were hungry.

Don't you want a nice sandwich? - No, thanks, Mom.

- We want turkey.

- We've got plenty of other things to eat.

- Oh, that's all right, Mom.

- We'll see you later, Mom.

- Hey, where are you going?

- Well, I just want to get my coat.

Uh, David?

Tell Mr. Thornberry I'll be right over there, too.

- Hi, Mr. Nelson.

- Oh, hi, Nancy.

- The Thornberrys aren't home.

They went downtown.

- Oh, well, what made you think I was

looking for the Thornberrys?

- Oh, I just saw David and Ricky.

They told me. - Oh!

Oh, that.

- Didn't you have any turkey left at your house?

- Well, you see, we had Thanksgiving dinner

over at Mrs. Nelson's aunt's, so you know how kids are.

Dave and Ricky are kind of disappointed

because they haven't had some of those Thanksgiving leftovers.

- Well, what about you?

- Well, I had plenty to eat yesterday.

- Oh, you couldn't possibly eat enough to last you

for two days.

- Well, you see, it's a funny thing.

Ordinarily, I'm what you might call a moderate eater.

But on Thanksgiving, something comes over me

and I'm a regular gourmand.

- A what?

- I'm practically a trencherman.

- What?

- I eat like a horse.

- Oh!

My father's the same way.

- You see, that's the reason I'm not

particularly interested in Thanksgiving leftovers.

You know, you get a little tired of turkey, turkey, turkey.

- Well, what about Mrs. Nelson's aunt?

- Oh, no, some woman's club is coming over to her house.

A bunch of old scavengers are going to stuff themselves

with other people's turkey, depriving

a family of a little Thanksgiving pleasure.

Naturally, I'm speaking on behalf of the boys.

- Oh, I agree with David and Ricky.

I think the leftovers is the best part of Thanksgiving.

First, you have cold turkey, and then

turkey a la king, and creamed turkey,

and turkey hash, turkey croquettes,

then turkey soup, and--

- By that time, Thanksgiving's here again.

- Well, my mother never let any of the turkey go to waste.

She's even making a feather duster.

- Oh, good for her.

You see, I'm this kind of a guy.

I like a lot of variety in my meals.

But I do feel awful sorry for the boys, though.

They won't come right out and admit it,

but they're just dying for some of those delicious turkey

leftovers.

- Well, why don't you go down to the butcher shop

and buy a turkey?

- Wouldn't I look a little silly walking into a butcher shop

and asking for a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?

- Well, no.

You don't have to tell him you're going to eat it.

- Well, I suppose we could tell him

we wanted it for a doorstop.

- Besides, what do you care what the butcher thinks?

The turkey's for David and Ricky.

- Whatever gave you that idea?

- Well, you just told me.

- Oh!

Yes, yes, it's for David and Ricky, of course.

- You may not be able to get a very large one.

- Well, that's all right.

We only want it for the leftovers.

Maybe I could get one that's been in a fight, maybe

the loser.

- Won't the boys be surprised.

- Yeah.

Turkey.

A nice slice of white meat, and a nice big slab

of dark meat, some mashed potatoes, and some cranberry

sauce, and some delicious gravy with giblets poured all over.

And I pick up this nice big turkey leg,

I sink my fangs into it.

- Mr. Nelson!

What are you doing with your tie?

- Oh, for goodness sakes!

Darn brown necktie.

I thought it was a turkey leg.

Marvelous.

- Marvelous.

- Well, what can I do for you, Mr. Nelson?

- Well, this is probably going to sound silly,

but we had Thanksgiving dinner over at Mrs. Nelson's aunt's,

and David and Ricky are just dying

for some turkey leftovers.

You know how kids are.

And believe it or not, I'd like to buy a turkey.

- Oh, gee, Mr. Nelson, I'm sorry.

You know, the day after Thanksgiving,

I don't think you'll find a turkey in any butcher

shop in town.

How about some nice veal?

- Veal? - Yeah.

You can fix it so it tastes just like turkey.

You make hash or croquettes.

The boys will never know the difference.

- Well, I don't know.

They're pretty smart kids.

- Maybe so, but if you fix it right,

no one can tell veal from turkey.

- I hate to argue with you, Mr. Bigelow,

but I'll guarantee I can tell the difference.

- Hey, here's an idea.

How about some ground round?

- Ground round?

Does that taste like turkey?

- No, but if you fix it right, it tastes like veal.

- Why, maybe some other time.

- Well, if you change your mind, just drop in.

I'll be glad to take care of you.

- OK.

Oh, uh, just in case Mrs. Nelson should forget, be sure

and order us a nice turkey for Christmas, will you?

- Oh, sure.

- Make it a nice big fat one so we

have lots of turkey leftovers, enough to--

Enough to last all week.

- I'll pick out a good one for you.

- Thanks a lot. I'll see you Mr. Bigelow.

- Goodbye.

Mr. Nelson?

- Yes?

- Happy New Year.

- Happy New Year.

- Catherine!

- Hi, Harriet.

- Hi!

- Catherine's not here.

Just went down to the drugstore for some bicarbonate.

- Oh, who's sicK?

- This green-faced fellow with a glassy eye standing in front

of you. - Oh.

- I think I sprained a stomach muscle.

I've been exercising pretty hard.

- Well, I wanted to ask Catherine how she was

fixed on the turkey situation.

Ozzie and the boys have developed a sudden urge

for some turkey leftovers, and I can't

imagine where to find any.

- Well, gosh.

I wish I could help you out, but Catherine and Will

have just about polished off our turkey.

There's only a tiny sliver left, and I've hidden

that in the laundry basket.

- My Aunt Ellen's using all of hers for the bridge club.

Well, I guess I'll just have to eat up the veal roast.

I hate to do it, though.

About the only thing Oz doesn't like is veal.

- Well, make hash out of it and tell him it's turkey.

He won't know the difference.

- Hey, I think you've got something there.

Not hash, necessarily, but I'll bet you

if I made veal croquettes, he'd never know the difference.

- I take it you're just about ready to put something over

on what is laughingly called "The Master of the House."

- Oh, Thorny.

- Oh, Harriet.

- Yeah?

- This is such a dirty trick.

Don't you dare to tell Oz this is my idea.

- Why not?

- Because I want to tell him myself.

- Oh, Thorny.

Well, there's one more turkey croquette left.

Who wants it?

- I'll be able to eat it in about an hour, Mom.

- Oh, if you're so full, David, I don't think you should, dear.

You're ought to have nightmares.

- I had a nightmare last night.

- That's too bad.

What did you dream?

- I was a turkey, and people were going to eat me.

- He started hollering, "Help me, David, help me."

- Did you help him?

- Well, I wanted to, but what can a pumpkin pie do?

- Harriet, may I say these turkey

croquettes are delicious.

- Well, thank you, dear.

I'm glad you enjoyed them.

- May I be excused, Mom?

- If you think you can get up from the table.

- I sure am full.

- You fellas have any homework to do?

- Yeah, but I don't think I can get upstairs to do it.

- Come on, Rick.

- Well, I guess I'll clear away these dishes.

I'm glad you enjoyed the turkey croquettes, dear.

- Uh, Harriet, now that the boys have left,

may I say that the veal croquettes were delicious.

- Veal croquettes? - Well, certainly.

You don't think you could fool an old gourmet like me, do you?

- A what?

- Gourmet!

"Gour" meaning "food," and "met" meaning "may I have some."

Gourmet.

- Yes, I know what it means.

I'm just surprised you claim to be one.

- Well, I recognized this veal, didn't I?

- I thought it tasted just like turkey.

- Oh, don't get me wrong.

This was delicious.

In fact, David thought it was turkey, didn't he?

- David was sure it was turkey.

- Well, why do you say that?

- Well, he was the one who went over to Aunt Ellen's to get it

for me.

- Wait a second.

You mean to say those veal croquettes really were turkey?

- Of course.

- Well, for goodness sakes, Harriet,

why didn't you tell me?

I would have enjoyed them more.

- But you kept saying it was turkey.

- Well, I was just trying to go along with you

and fool the boys.

- Well, I'm sure you enjoyed them.

You managed to put away six or seven.

- Wh-- what about your Aunt Ellen?

- Oh, she's fine.

- Well, I know.

I mean what about the scavengers--

I mean, you know, the ladies?

- Oh, the meeting.

Oh, well, Aunt Ellen was right the first time.

The meeting was to be held at Mrs. Peter's house.

Mrs. Henderson was just stopping by to pick her up.

- Well, I still say I would have enjoyed them more if I'd

known it was actually turkey!

- Well, there's plenty more cold turkey in the refrigerator.

You can have a little midnight snack.

- Oh, yeah.

What time is it now?

About 6:30.

- Oh.

I don't think I can wait until midnight.

Suppose we make it a 7 o'clock snack.

- No, sir.

Where are you going?

- Well, I'm just going to, uh, help you,

as I'll, uh, carry this plate out to the kitchen.

- Where's Pop, Mom?

- He's out in the kitchen, dear.

- Oh, thanks.

What are you doing, Pop?

- Oh, just, uh, putting the milk away.

- You're putting the milk inside the turkey?

- No.

Turkey looks good, though, doesn't it?

Here's a nice little sliver.

- Are you kidding?

That sliver could kill a guy.

- Oh, boy! Can we have some, Pop?

- Sure. Help yourself.

Oh, boy, this is delicious.

- What are you guys doing?

You just finished your dinner.

- Oh, we're just finishing up a few of these leftovers.

This is terrific.

- Hello?

May I speak to Dr. Brown, please?

- Harriet, did you know there's a great big plate

full of turkey out in the kitchen?

- Oh, yes, I meant to tell you.

Nancy Baker's mother stopped by, and she

said they had a great big turkey yesterday,

and Nancy felt so sorry for you that she insisted

that we take the leftovers.

I couldn't talk her out of it.

- Well, gee, that's very nice of her,

but I think I've had enough turkey to--

Well, I wonder who that is.

Mr. Bigelow!

- I got to worrying about not having a turkey

for you this afternoon.

They were scattered all over town,

and I finally find you this beauty.

- Oh!

- It's a big one.

You can have turkey all week.

- Oh, you shouldn't have done it.

- Oh, it's OK, Mr. Nelson.

Good night.

- Good night, Mr. Bigelow.

Harriet, wait till you see what just came in the front door.

- Wait till you see what just came in the back door.

- Nancy Baker was played by Eilene Janssen.

The butcher's name was Arthur Q. Bryan.

And the turkey answers to the name of Esmeralda.

Next week, "The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet, David, and Ricky--

Will be brought to you by Listerine, the most widely used

oral antiseptic in the world.