Original subtitles

One and two and three and five,

l've got a stitch,

l am coming for you, Holly, my princess!

Thank you for buying my freedom, friend, One day, l'll repay you,

l'm counting on it, ball,

Merry Christmas, you piece of fish,

Welcome to Hell, Hitler,

ALL: Heil!

(ROCK MUSlC PLAYS)

We did it! We killed Hitler!

Yeah! Let's celebrate with merchandise!

We've got Dead Hitler mugs, hats, costumes, action figures,

crucifixes, asparagus,

What are you on about, llsa? Hitler's dead, We won,

Have a cordial,

Well, l'm glad you recycle,

What was that all about? That was supposed to be my hand,

Well,,,

Yes, A toast, To celebrate dead Hitler,

Or,,, celebrate dead Hitler's toast,

Yes? (LAUGHS)

Did you see it, Jackson? Did you see it?

l've seen the head before, man,

You know, it looks good,

Christ, God, Tucker! Pass the piece,

He's alive, Jackson! He's alive!

Cool it, man, Look at him, We shot him up, He's super dead,

Super dead,

Take a picture with Hitler, only 1 5 pieces of eight!

(SCREAMS)

(GROANS)

(SCREAMS)

Get out! Move!

(THUNDER CRACKS)

PlERRE: Rock Wolf, The Nazicaster,

He'll rip us all to shreds,

TUCKER: Everybody get out of here,

Go, go, go, go, go! Go!

(ROCK MUSlC PLAYS)

As my princess, the new Snow Maiden of Russia,

you have unlimited access to all the games and amusements of USSR-Land,

Of all my kidnappers, you're the best, Niki,

Russia rocks!

(STRUMS CHORD)

Johnny Hitler?

What's up with your complexion?

l got her first, Zombie Hitler,

You get your own firm, nubile princess,

(PLAYS RlFF)

Huh?

(SCREAMS)

(SCREAMS)

Fine, She is yours,

(LAUGHS)

Holly dies and comes back to life,

Hitler dies and he comes back to life,

Why is Claire the only one who won't come back to life?

Ugh! Ohh!

Jackson!

You can do this, my friend,

lt's the music, lt's not blocking out the communism,

Here, Try this,

Get in there, ('80s POP MUSlC PLAYS)

o/~ Face your fears Face Russia,,, o/~

(SCREAMS)

(HELlCOPTER APPROACHES)

Holly's here? How the fish did she get to Russia?

Open the doors!

What are you doing, llsa? We're going to lose Hitler,

You're married?

- Jackson! What are you doing? - l'm facing my fears, pal,

l've gotta punish Khrushchev for llsa,

lt's my ticket out of the zone,

That's what a fool believes, my friend!

l am sorry, comrades,

l must open my Christmas present early,

Yes! (LAUGHS)

(SPEAKS RUSSlAN)

(SCREAMS)

(LAUGHS)

Man, why didn't l bring any more than two bullets?

They're coming, my friends,

Calm down, Pierre,

We'll have no wucking forries with those nasty Nazis

if we just stick together,

(NElGHlNG, HOOVES CLOPPlNG, TlNNY COUNTRY MUSlC PLAYS)

llsa!

Stop being such a busybody and get back here!

Come on, Tucker! We're not safe here!

Nonsense,

l saved this snazzy survival board from the crash,

Good idea,

(LAUGHS)

Oh, Christ God, this place looks just like Busyland in Florida,

Holy shit, my childhood heroes Michael Rat and Sailor Goose!

l've got you guys, l've got your back, guys,

God Christ, no, Michael Rat's a Communist,

Help me, tape!

o/~ Russia, Russia, Russia, Russia,,, o/~

(MlAOW!)

Father, cat is hungry,

We will buy another cat,

(POKlES JACKPOT MUSlC PLAYS)

Oh, my God! Somebody call 91 1 !

(BOTH SCREAM)

Huh?

lt's over, Johnny,

l'm the Princess of Russia now, l'm totally out of your league,

The head! Shoot him in the head!

Hai!

(LAUGHS)

Dead? He's dead!

We did it! We killed Hitler! Again! And again!

Oh, did you hear that, Claire?

Revenge is finally,,,

(GROANS)

(SCREAMS)

Get off her, you raisin damper!

Come on, my friend! Let's go!

There, All safe again,

(LAUGHS)

(NElGHlNG, HOOVES CLOPPlNG, TlNNY COUNTRY MUSlC PLAYS)

(NElGHS)

Oh, Ohh!

Hmm!

(HUMS) Oooh!

We're safe, my friends,

We have everything we need right here,

Clothes, candy, merchandise,

Now we just wait till the zombies decompose,

How long's that gonna take?

Ugh! Typical,

l finally meet a kidnapper who knows what a girl wants

and l'm stuck with you gweebs,

And there's no goddamn extra medium!

This Sailor Goose duffle bag is far nicer than your grubby sack, Claire,

(GASPS) Claire?

(GROWLS)

You're alive!

Oh, give us a kiss, honey,

No, no! Tucker!

(SCREAMS)

Nonsense,

That was just a peck from my wife who's come back to life,

Yes, Rhymes, (LAUGHS)

That bite looks nasty,

Hey, McKenzie, try a glob of Claire's Jung Oil,

Hmm,

No, no!

But won't it make the poison run through your system quicker?

Maybe you should cut your arm off,

We can start our life anew, Claire,

Why, we could even have our honeymoon here in USSR-Land,

Finally! Let's have some fun,

l've got unlimited access to everything,

Right, Let's go!

No, no! Don't go outside!

What's wrong with you, Tucker?

Fizzy cola,

(LAUGHS)

Nikita Khrushchev,

My men found you unconscious under a bench,

They said you had tears in your eyes,

lt hurts me to see llsa with such a weak, watery man,

Hey, llsa made copies?

Where did you get those copies? Those copies are mine!

l'll make you pay for what you did to llsa!

l'll make you pay for what you did to llsa!

Whatever it is, you commie piece of shit!

General!

(LAUGHS)

Noooo!

General Jung Moon-Ho,

No, No!

No! No!

No! No! Noooo!

(SENSU AL MUSlC PLAYS)

Thanks for bringing the ball, Leroy,

l'd stay and hang but l've gotta kill Khrushchev,

Get out of the friend zone,

See you down the club, man,

(HUMS)

Get away from my prize box, you filthy goons,

Hey! You can win a hooker again,

Hmm? Daughter?

Cabbage?

What? Cold, Air-conditioning,

- Younger woman, you say? - Mm-hm,

Wise choice,

You are maybe bit past springtime now, l think,

Hey, you call me 'Dad',

And if you in prime, then why you not pregnant?

Hmm?

Oi, oi, oi! Such disappointment!

Your Soviet-issue sister Libertina has had 500 children already!

No, l don't want llsa to leave,

l miss llsa,

(SPEAKS RUSSlAN)

(BOTH LAUGH)

Claire!

My friend, please!

We must seek refuge from the zombies!

Hey!

( CHUCKLES)

Stop the pump, my friend, and run!

( COUGHS)

Mmm! These Daego Dogs are the best!

Claire just loves traditional Russian food,

Elbows off the table,

Gesu Cristo!

(RETCHES)

('80s-STYLE S YNTH MUSlC PLAYS)

Soviet dance witches?

No,

lt's,,, beautiful,

Must,,, overpower,,, skull,

The power is mine,

(LAUGHS)

Disappear!

Oh!

l'm coming for you, Khrushchev!

(TYRES SQUEAL)

(LAUGHS)

(BOTH LAUGH)

Oh, you go kill Khrushchev and be Snow Maiden again,

l love cake,

(GASPS) Prizes!

Yes! (LAUGHS)

l'll win you a prize, Claire,

A bunny for my honey,

A beetroot for my sweet treat,

Tucker! You found a gun!

Quick! Shoot the zombies!

(LAUGHS) This is a Russian-made gun, Pierre,

lt only works on gypsies,

Yes!

This potato will make you better,

Then we shall burn the carbs together,

(LAUGHS)

( COUGHS)

No, l won't do it, my friend,

Who, what, where, when, why and howzat?

(LAUGHS)

Ooh! Now, isn't this flash, Claire?

Claire?

Claire, don't you want your prize?

(SCREAMS)

You've,,, become a harpy,

A floozy, A kissy-missy,

You're not alive,

You're one of them,

Ooh! He's so cute!

That's Claire's prize,

Whoa! He talks!

The rollercoaster's a great idea!

All right, my friend,

(PLAYS SMOOTH JAZZ)

Arrrgh!

(LAUGHS)

That,,, that sounded like Hitler,

Teddy bear Hitler?

His spirit must have possessed the teddy bear,

l should have known!

Only Hitler likes rollercoasters,

(LAUGHS)

After him!

o/~ Face your fears Face Russia

o/~ Face your fears Face Russia o/~

Khrushchev!

Please, American,

Let's make a deal,

What time is it, Khrushchev?

Um,,,

- Die time, - What?

llsa!

Don't worry, llsa, l got this,

Stay out of this?

Yes, You broke my heart good,

- Huh? - Wait,

You took those photos to get back at Khrushchev?

l'm very sweet?

Please, l'm sorry, llsa,

Please, l should never betrayed you,

(GRUNTS)

(SENSU AL DANCE MUSlC PLAYS)

LERO Y: See you down the club, man,

Go, go, Tucker! Go!

Whoo! (LAUGHS)

l love speed!

Whoo!

Fish!

Pierre, l don't know if l can catch him,

Hitler was a championship racer in his day,

(PLAYS SMOOTH JAZZ)

Hey! Don't slow down,

Dammit, Tucker!

(LAUGHS)

(SCREAMS)

- Hitler's ghost? - Fish!

Ohh,

(BOTH SCREAM)

(LAUGHS)

(SCREAMS)

(PlERRE AND TUCKER SCREAM)

- Everything's gone all wonky, - My friends,

Hitler has possessed Holly

and now l think he's messing with the space-time continuum,

Continuum? What does that mean?

Quickly, friends! Take a drink,

- We're going back in time, - Okay,

MAN: New from Tamico!

One, two, three, four, (PLAYS GUITAR POORLY)

No, no, no!

Aw, this sucks, I want rock'n 'roII,

Become a rock'n 'roII superstar

with Rock WoIf,

Rock WoIf comes with 50 pre-programmed riffs

shredded by HitIer himseIf,

HITLER: Power to the master race!

Use the Maximum Overdrive pedaI

for totaI indoctrination,

Rock WoIf and the Maximum Overdrive pedaI

require 88 D-ceII batteries to operate,

OnIy from Tamico,

Subtitles SBS Australia 201 4

o/~ Face your fears Face Russia

o/~ Face your fears Face,,, o/~

lt worked! We're back in World War ll,

We come bearing gifts!

Claire! How could you?

PlERRE AND PlERRE: This calls for a celebration!