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1
00:00:02,984 --> 00:00:14,052
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
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2
00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:26,609
- No carte. Monsieur Gruber?
- No carte.
3
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:28,040
No carte.
4
00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,371
Nine.
5
00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:33,409
Looks like the house
is going to be
6
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,809
6,000,000 Reichsmarks lighter
in bullion this weekend.
7
00:00:53,160 --> 00:00:54,571
Fu Manchu!
8
00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:57,445
You can't just keep yelling out
the name of the game, Pierre,
9
00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:58,801
that's not how it works.
10
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:00,240
Fu Manchu.
11
00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:02,807
- Stop being a child!
- This game sucks. I win.
12
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:05,765
It doesn't suck. It's made
by a very reputable plastics company.
13
00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:09,964
There isn't a bank.
14
00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:12,569
- I brought that.
- Why?
15
00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:16,651
I thought we were playing Money.
It's the only reason I agreed to this board-game bullshit.
16
00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:20,845
I thought you would.
17
00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:25,325
Mission o'clock, boys and girls.
18
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:29,206
The Nazis have occupied a coastal
Moroccan city called Waheed al Quarn...
19
00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:32,006
What do the Nazis want with
a Maghreb state in North Africa?
20
00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:33,645
What's that on your shoulder, Claire?
21
00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:36,605
- Nothing.
- Spot on. Nothing. Just that.
22
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,370
- Now what's on mine?
- Three stars.
23
00:01:38,560 --> 00:01:40,324
Yes, three st...
24
00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:47,245
Yes. Two stars.
25
00:01:47,480 --> 00:01:50,211
And those stars mean I talk,
you shut your damn mouth.
26
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:53,927
One month ago my Allied Command
sent one of their top agents
27
00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:56,122
code-named Gruber
to Waheed Al Quarn.
28
00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:57,845
He collected information
that indicates
29
00:01:58,040 --> 00:02:00,691
Hitler has taken up residence
there in the casino.
30
00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:03,247
However, Gruber himself
has completely disappeared.
31
00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:06,489
Your mission is to get into
that casino and find Gruber,
32
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,603
but above all, kill Hitler.
33
00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:11,690
Well, there's the casino.
34
00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:16,568
And there's an Italian submarine
in the bay,
35
00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:18,888
probably a Gino Terrini Class.
36
00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:22,289
That thing would do a good job
of keeping any unwanted visitors out.
37
00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:25,126
All looks like a bit
of a Chinese dinner to me.
38
00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:26,924
I say we call in an aerial strike,
39
00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:30,124
dig out Hitler's corpse by sun-up
and have a light supper.
40
00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:32,084
- I'll get on the radio to base.
- Hold on.
41
00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:33,964
First of all
we should take out the submarine.
42
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:37,403
We should walk in, find Hitler,
and blow his face off his head bone.
43
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:40,410
- That's a perfectly elegant solution.
- It's called getting shit done, lady.
44
00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:42,682
No it's called
getting people killed, you louse.
45
00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:44,245
- You wanna throw down?
- Shut up, you two.
46
00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:45,601
We take a vote, then.
47
00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:48,929
There are two choices -
Jackson's plan with the casino,
48
00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:50,724
and Claire's with the submarine.
49
00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:53,161
- What about my plan?
- Who votes for Jackson?
50
00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:58,731
Okay, now Claire's plan.
51
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:04,484
Fine, we split up and do both.
52
00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:06,444
As for me...
53
00:03:06,640 --> 00:03:11,407
- It's the casino.
- All right!
54
00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:25,084
Any sign of Hitler?
55
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:32,331
No, but there is an unusual degree
of security for your average casino.
56
00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:39,451
llsa?
57
00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:42,411
It's Rommel, the Desert Fox!
58
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:14,090
You look...
59
00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:18,287
The submarine
is awfully close to shore.
60
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:20,403
Surely we could swim out to it
quite easily.
61
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:24,082
Hello, I am Gina,
but they call me Gypsy.
62
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:26,726
- What are you drinking tonight?
- Oh, juice for me.
63
00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:29,048
I'll have a gin,
with a pinch of Tony Manero.
64
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:31,641
- What's your accent, Italian?
- Romanian.
65
00:04:31,840 --> 00:04:35,367
You don't have any Jenson and Jenson
menthol coupes, do you?
66
00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:38,404
Of course we do.
Who doesn't stock menthol coupes?
67
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,364
A packet of those, then.
68
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,403
I'll return with your drinks.
69
00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:45,922
You don't smoke menthol coupes,
you're a Montalbano Classics man.
70
00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:48,930
And Gypsy isn't Romanian.
I needed to get her to say "coupe".
71
00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:52,203
It's the only way to tell the difference
between an Italian and a Romanian.
72
00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:55,051
Never mind that.
The submarine just docked.
73
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,764
Oh great, Italians.
74
00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:13,447
What are all these Italians
doing here?
75
00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:15,642
Once a month,
all the submarine boys come here
76
00:05:15,840 --> 00:05:16,841
and drink themselves senseless.
77
00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:19,646
Plus they can't seem
to get enough of Rosetta Marconi.
78
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:30,208
Rosetta!
79
00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:33,286
Rosetta!
80
00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:38,482
- We need to take the sub now.
- Are you mad?
81
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,842
We haven't got
a crispy wonton chance on our own.
82
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,008
- We should call in a strike.
- You heard her.
83
00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:45,806
We won't have a chance as good as this
for another month.
84
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,082
- All the sailors are in here.
- I don't know about this.
85
00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:50,681
- What's the matter, Tucker, scared?
- No, it's just I think...
86
00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:53,121
Fine, then let's move.
87
00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:04,445
You've had amnesia for two years?
88
00:06:18,840 --> 00:06:21,446
All this time...
l thought you were dead.
89
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:26,407
But I have kept you
close to my heart.
90
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,289
Don't you recognise her?
91
00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:33,803
It's you.
92
00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:43,204
My love, my wife,
we are together again at last.
93
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:48,649
My God,
llsa was married to Rommel!
94
00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:51,366
I've been married to things
a lot scarier than Nazis, my friend.
95
00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:56,687
I'm the general manager, you know.
96
00:06:56,880 --> 00:07:00,168
No one above me
other than you-know-who.
97
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:12,125
Well, we had a bit of trouble
recently with a man up in room 219,
98
00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:14,084
but we took care of that.
99
00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:15,845
I must go, my sweet.
100
00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:20,566
We'll see.
101
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:23,443
Don't run away now, my love.
102
00:07:30,040 --> 00:07:31,451
That's it!
103
00:07:31,640 --> 00:07:33,051
Hey!
104
00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:39,321
So...
105
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,446
I'll put him out for an hour.
106
00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:15,088
All right, I'll deploy the smoke grenades,
and you're going to have to fight.
107
00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:19,161
Oh great, Italians.
108
00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,725
Jump, damn it!
109
00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:22,445
I can't swim.
110
00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:23,971
What?
111
00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:43,606
Room service.
112
00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:48,487
- I'm sorry, I didn't order any...
- But I insist. I insist.
113
00:08:48,680 --> 00:08:52,730
- Really, now is not the best time.
- Please, you will enjoy.
114
00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:55,605
Red wine?
115
00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:57,529
With chicken?
116
00:08:57,720 --> 00:08:59,165
Burn in hell, you dog!
117
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:07,121
Your brother died like a dog, Jinko.
118
00:09:07,320 --> 00:09:10,324
But you at least
have the strength to die with honour.
119
00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:14,570
And it is an honour
to die by your hand, Sharif.
120
00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:16,000
Ughh...
121
00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:20,444
One part gin,
one part pomegranate syrup,
122
00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:25,601
fill with pineapple juice,
serve over crushed ice.
123
00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,247
The perfect Fruit'n'Khamun.
124
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,331
No, thanks.
I brought my own.
125
00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:23,567
Where is your friend?
Ran off, did he?
126
00:10:23,760 --> 00:10:25,683
- How about a drink?
- Gin.
127
00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:28,008
- With what?
- Just gin.
128
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:30,161
Okay...
129
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:34,326
Ah...
130
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,204
Gypsy, you whore!
131
00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:38,681
What?
That was quick, she's over there.
132
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,281
Tell me, Gypsy, do you call
these drugs you sell "pure"?
133
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:44,131
I get it from my man Colonel Chang
and his stuff is always pure.
134
00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:47,051
And do you sell me a great big
bullshit horse with this story?
135
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,647
- Tough luck. Non-refundable.
- Non-refundable?
136
00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:51,888
Good thing for you
I don't want no refund.
137
00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:55,243
I'm gonna get my money's worth
and I'm going to get it right now.
138
00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:16,642
Can I have my gin now, please?
139
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:25,765
Pair of ladies.
140
00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:37,884
Zat was very amusing,
but I hope these vimsical tricks
141
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:41,880
play no part
in your impressive vinnings, Mr...
142
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:44,287
Baccarat, John Baccarat.
143
00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:46,960
I save the tricks
for the ladies, Mr...
144
00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:50,084
Rommel, Erwin Rommel.
145
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:52,123
Mr Rimmel. Yeah, right.
146
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:53,401
No, it's...
147
00:11:56,080 --> 00:12:00,051
Sveetness, come and have a game.
148
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:05,566
Ah, Mr Baccarat.
149
00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,162
May I introduce you
to my wife, llsa?
150
00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:12,089
I'm sure you von't mind
if she joins.
151
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:18,925
- I vager a banco of 3000.
- 3000 for banco.
152
00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:20,167
Banco.
153
00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:26,721
- No carte.
- No carte.
154
00:12:26,920 --> 00:12:28,445
- Carte.
- Carte.
155
00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:31,646
Eight.
156
00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,286
Nine, bad luck.
157
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:39,448
You seem to have
quite ze touch, Mr Baccarat.
158
00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:43,850
Vould you be interested in
a private game... at ze owner's table?
159
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:47,726
- You gonna bring the legs?
- Well... of course.
160
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:49,604
Then that sounds just dandy.
Thanks, Ed.
161
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:50,926
Schplendid.
162
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:53,771
I shall send somevone
for you in an hour.
163
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:57,248
As for now,
I have business to attend to.
164
00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:00,642
Keep having fun, my love.
165
00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:16,530
Your friend,
he's in the submarine, I know.
166
00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:19,929
- It's my fault.
- Not entirely.
167
00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:22,043
I want to help you get him back.
168
00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:24,402
Thanks,
but I don't think you can.
169
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:28,051
Hey, what are they delivering,
ammunition?
170
00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:29,765
Coffee beans.
171
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,248
They drink so much of the stuff
they need a new crate every hour.
172
00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:35,522
My brother Gino,
he flies the plane.
173
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,450
Caffè, caffè, caffè!
174
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,560
For the love of God,
don't give me any more coffee!
175
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:37,361
Crotch.
176
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:38,847
Crotch.
177
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:40,963
Crotch.
Well done, my Fuehrer.
178
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:57,128
In theory, my Fuehrer, yes,
they are ready to go.
179
00:14:57,320 --> 00:15:00,290
However there is a small issue
with the auto-fire mode.
180
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:04,610
The guns tend to heat up
when fired at full automatic.
181
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:06,643
Three of my men
have been badly burnt.
182
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:10,890
I propose we trial some different kinds
of ammunition, and perhaps...
183
00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:25,163
My Fuehrer,
his name is John Baccarat.
184
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:28,603
He's been having a tremendous
amount of luck on ze gaming floor.
185
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,371
I think it's time
we gave him a private game.
186
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:39,083
My Fuehrer, since we have
such a large quantity of gold,
187
00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:41,521
I was thinking maybe we could...
188
00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:02,926
Maybe I thought you were
so wound up playing lover girl
189
00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:04,929
that you'd forget
we're trying to kill Hitler.
190
00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:08,363
Thanks for filling us in on the whole
"married to a Nazi" thing by the way.
191
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,081
Why not screw him
and get it over with?
192
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:19,050
Greetings.
193
00:16:20,040 --> 00:16:22,122
Can I have some of that
Chocolate Monday, Jackson?
194
00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:24,448
- Knock yourself out.
- Much obliged.
195
00:16:26,280 --> 00:16:27,964
What is the commotion about?
196
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:34,288
You're John Baccarat?
Oh my.
197
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:38,963
- You are aware Hitler plans to kill you in a private card game, yes?
- Not if I kill him first.
198
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:52,964
Friends, please.
Look at this on the sunny side.
199
00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,721
Both of you will be in the same room
as Hitler in less than an hour.
200
00:16:56,920 --> 00:17:00,367
This is our chance.
I'm going to call Claire.
201
00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:11,441
- Yes?
- Claire, how's things, my friend?
202
00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:13,125
- Capital.
- Superb.
203
00:17:13,320 --> 00:17:16,403
It seems Hitler is using
the bullion winnings from his casino
204
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:18,728
to rearm the entire German army
205
00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:21,924
with superior golden super weapons
made of gold.
206
00:17:22,120 --> 00:17:25,090
- All right.
- Hitler also seems to be killing off any successful gamblers
207
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:27,487
with some sort
of private death game.
208
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,923
Oh yes, and Jackson seems to have
been invited to one of these...
209
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:32,610
private games.
210
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:34,928
You got the submarine
under control?
211
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:37,441
Can you stop the shipment?
Can I speak to Tucker?
212
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,130
Ah... he's in the gents.
213
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,766
The submarine should be
neutralised any minute now.
214
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:45,442
Excellent. We are going to try and
turn Hitler's game around on him.
215
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:47,802
The game starts in half an hour.
216
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:51,846
Send us a signal when the bay is under
control and the reinforcements are here.
217
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,771
- Good luck, my friend.
- Same to you.
218
00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:08,721
Much obliged.
219
00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:13,251
Two thousand.
220
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:18,210
- Banco.
- Banco.
221
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:49,641
Ciao, boys!
222
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:08,201
Damn it!
223
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:11,207
Three.
Game, Fuehrer.
224
00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:17,171
- Suivi.
- Suivi?
225
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:18,811
- Banco.
- Banco.
226
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,525
- Carte.
- Carte.
227
00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:40,365
Nine.
228
00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:45,527
Yep.
229
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:05,531
The Nazis are shipping speedboats
full of weapons out of the bay.
230
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:06,767
Right.
231
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:09,884
You keep distracting the Italians.
I'll see what I can do.
232
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:13,921
Oh, yes.
I am sorry about all this.
233
00:20:14,120 --> 00:20:15,565
Forget about it.
234
00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:50,007
Drop it, Rommel,
or Pierre is gonna ice Adolf.
235
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:53,170
- He's got a pretty clear shot.
- So do I.
236
00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:56,921
llsa, have you been in cahoots
with this Baccarat character all along?
237
00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:00,681
I'm bangin' her, Rommel.
238
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:03,167
How could you do this to me?
239
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:05,567
I'm bangin' her Rommel.
240
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:06,921
I'm bangin' her, Rommel.
241
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:22,289
Damn it, they're gone.
242
00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:24,960
Looks like Claire and Tucker
sent in the cavalry.
243
00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:36,930
I don't think you can make banco
this time, Adolf.
244
00:21:37,120 --> 00:21:39,122
Banco.
245
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,804
Okay, boys, shoot these Nazis.
246
00:21:46,360 --> 00:21:49,603
Who needs a gun
when you've got... imagination?
247
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:55,720
Bang!
248
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:36,402
I am the King of Waheed Al Quarn.
249
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:38,648
Thank you, thank you
for liberating our city!
250
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:42,970
Don't mention it.
What will you do with all that gold?
251
00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:46,607
We shall use it to restore
Waheed Al Quarn to its former glory
252
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:49,246
as the best brothel in North Africa!
253
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:54,081
What is that
immensely shiny object?
254
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,488
Lieutenant, what do you think
that ruddy great shiny thing is?
255
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:09,206
I think
it's an ordinance beacon, sir.
256
00:23:10,360 --> 00:23:12,283
Shell it, then, I suppose.
257
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:13,402
Jones.
258
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:45,368
The Mazzarucci Shaveissimo.
259
00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:49,451
Finally, you can be the one
who always has time to look good.
260
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:53,690
Mazzarucci Shaveissimo,
re-define your face.
261
00:23:54,621 --> 00:24:05,689
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
Exclusive for http://UKsubtitles.ru
262
00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,171
Everybody put your trousers on,
orders are in.
263
00:24:35,360 --> 00:24:38,807
Over the last several days,
Allied forces across Europe
264
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:40,240
have been defecting to the Nazis.
265
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:43,649
Field Marshall Jenkins' entire platoon
has recently gone Nazi
266
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:46,366
and Jenkins has a whole lot
of classified information in his head
267
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:48,449
we don't want the Nazis
to get their hands on.
268
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:51,689
Your mission is to get Jenkins
back onto home soil,
269
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:55,248
find out what's making our men
defect to the Nazis, and kill Hitler!
19826
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