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1
00:00:02,370 --> 00:00:05,506
"Cheers" is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:09,243
Oh, no.
3
00:00:09,310 --> 00:00:10,711
You got some
Car trouble?
4
00:00:10,778 --> 00:00:13,914
Every time it gets cold,
My stupid battery dies.
5
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:15,249
Got to get a new one?
6
00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:17,851
No. That's all right.
I got one right here.
7
00:00:17,918 --> 00:00:19,087
[grunts]
8
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:20,688
Hey, norm,
Close the hood.
9
00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:22,756
Start walking real fast.
10
00:00:31,299 --> 00:00:34,102
* makin' your way
In the world today *
11
00:00:34,168 --> 00:00:37,138
* takes everything
You've got *
12
00:00:37,205 --> 00:00:39,940
* takin' a break
From all your worries *
13
00:00:40,007 --> 00:00:42,076
* sure would
Help a lot *
14
00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:46,580
* wouldn't you like
To get away *
15
00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:51,119
* sometimes
You want to go *
16
00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:54,655
* where everybody
Knows your name *
17
00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:59,827
* and they're always
Glad you came *
18
00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:03,431
* you want to be
Where you can see *
19
00:01:03,497 --> 00:01:06,200
* our troubles
Are all the same *
20
00:01:06,267 --> 00:01:07,401
* you want to be *
21
00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:10,404
* where everybody
Knows your name *
22
00:01:11,505 --> 00:01:14,108
* you want to go
Where people know *
23
00:01:14,175 --> 00:01:16,744
* people are all
The same *
24
00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:18,011
* you want to go *
25
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:21,282
* where everybody
Knows your name *
26
00:01:40,168 --> 00:01:43,737
Hey, guys, how do I look?
27
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:45,506
Hey, major spiffy.
28
00:01:45,573 --> 00:01:47,107
That's right.
Today's the big day,
Isn't it?
29
00:01:47,175 --> 00:01:49,810
Yep. Kelly's
Coming back from france.
30
00:01:49,877 --> 00:01:51,412
She's hopping the pond, eh?
31
00:01:51,479 --> 00:01:52,646
The what?
32
00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:55,416
The pond.
It's a reference
To the atlantic.
33
00:01:55,483 --> 00:01:58,619
Uh, the atlantic is
An ocean, not a pond,
34
00:01:58,686 --> 00:02:00,221
Dr. Crane.
35
00:02:00,288 --> 00:02:03,891
How many of those
Have you had?
36
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:05,759
Apparently not enough.
37
00:02:07,094 --> 00:02:08,829
Boy, I am
Really nervous.
38
00:02:08,896 --> 00:02:11,965
It seems like kelly's
Been gone a year.
39
00:02:12,032 --> 00:02:13,967
How long
Has she been gone?
40
00:02:14,034 --> 00:02:15,169
A year.
41
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,640
Can I put some ice
In that drink for you,
Dr. Crane?
42
00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:23,411
Hey, guys.
43
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:26,414
I just put a down payment
On immortality.
44
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,416
Yeah, what are you
Talking about?
45
00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:31,219
I'm sorry.
It just slipped out.
46
00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:34,388
The miracle
Of cryogenics.
47
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:36,924
Oh, that thing
Where they freeze you?
48
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:37,991
Yeah. Go ahead,
Take a look.
49
00:02:38,058 --> 00:02:39,527
You know,
When my number is up,
50
00:02:39,593 --> 00:02:42,396
I'll be frozen
And preserved
In a subzero container
51
00:02:42,463 --> 00:02:45,999
Moments after,
A doctor declares me
Legally brain-dead.
52
00:02:46,066 --> 00:02:48,236
Boy, that's a tough call.
53
00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:50,604
You know,
In this brochure,
54
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,906
These containers
Look kind of small.
55
00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:56,043
They don't freeze
Your entire body, no,
Just the brain part.
56
00:02:56,109 --> 00:02:58,612
They cut off your head
And freeze it?
57
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:01,148
What do they do with
The rest of your body,
Throw it away?
58
00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:02,450
Well, it's a start.
59
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,718
Cliff, this corporation
Wouldn't be owned
60
00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:07,455
By a dog food company,
Would it?
61
00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:10,291
I want to
Get this straight.
62
00:03:10,358 --> 00:03:11,725
So when it's time
For you to thaw,
63
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:13,827
What do they do,
They put your head
In a plastic bag
64
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:17,431
And plop you
In some boiling water
For 3 minutes?
65
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:20,434
Sammy, sammy,
This is science,
Not lean cuisine.
66
00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:24,272
Hey, clavin on ice.
That's nice.
67
00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:26,073
Now, wait a minute.
68
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:27,841
Why is everybody
Making fun of cliff?
69
00:03:27,908 --> 00:03:30,744
Now, I'm not saying
That I believe that
Cliff's severed head
70
00:03:30,811 --> 00:03:33,381
Will be brought back
To life in the year 2278
71
00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:36,984
To charm and delight
A new generation
Of bostonians,
72
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,386
But who knows?
73
00:03:38,452 --> 00:03:40,321
I mean, who can
Predict the future?
74
00:03:40,388 --> 00:03:41,622
Hey, look, everybody.
75
00:03:41,689 --> 00:03:44,658
It's clavin's
Family reunion.
76
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:47,261
That's it.
I'm out of here.
77
00:03:47,328 --> 00:03:49,663
I'll have real friends
In 2278.
78
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,665
Oh, yeah,
You and the other
Severed heads
79
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:53,834
Can go bowling
Or something.
80
00:03:57,671 --> 00:03:58,972
Hello, woody.
81
00:03:59,039 --> 00:04:00,308
Kelly.
82
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:02,543
Boy, I've missed you,
Kelly.
83
00:04:02,610 --> 00:04:04,778
I've missed you, too,
Woody.
84
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:08,248
I brought you a present.
It's a real french beret.
85
00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:10,984
Ta-da!
Oh, wow.
86
00:04:11,051 --> 00:04:12,152
It was
Between this one
87
00:04:12,219 --> 00:04:13,721
And the one with
The arrow through it.
88
00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:16,724
Oh, well,
This one's nice, too.
89
00:04:17,691 --> 00:04:19,627
Surprise!
I got them both.
90
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:22,330
Ohh!
This is going to be fun.
91
00:04:22,396 --> 00:04:24,432
This is going to be
Just like old times.
92
00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:27,034
I can't wait.
So what do you
Feel like doing?
93
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,836
I don't know.
What do you
Feel like doing?
94
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,771
I don't know.
What do you
Feel like doing?
95
00:04:30,838 --> 00:04:34,207
Gosh. This is
Just like old times.
96
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,044
Listen, maybe henri
Will know what to do.
97
00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,211
Who?
98
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:41,248
Henri--my new best friend
From paris.
99
00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:42,983
Woody, this is henri.
100
00:04:43,050 --> 00:04:44,385
Henri, this is woody.
101
00:04:44,452 --> 00:04:47,388
Ah, woody. Yes. I've
Heard so much about you.
102
00:04:47,455 --> 00:04:49,390
Give me 40 bucks,
Please.
103
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:51,592
I have to pay
For the cab.
104
00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:54,562
Thanks.
105
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:57,365
I'll be right back.
106
00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:07,375
Did that guy just
Take me for 40 bucks,
107
00:05:07,441 --> 00:05:09,777
Kiss you twice,
And leave?
108
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:12,380
Woody,
You're so american.
109
00:05:12,446 --> 00:05:15,048
Henri is
My photography teacher.
110
00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:16,717
He's the greatest.
111
00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,552
He showed me
All of paris,
112
00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,554
Taught me all
About french food,
113
00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:22,856
Taught me not to be
Ashamed of my body,
114
00:05:22,923 --> 00:05:25,859
And he lectured me
In history and art.
115
00:05:25,926 --> 00:05:29,196
Wait, wait, wait.
Can we go back
To that body thing?
116
00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:32,199
Henri took some
Art photographs of me.
117
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:33,901
They were very tasteful.
118
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,335
Now, hold on.
119
00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:36,937
You guys aren't...
120
00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:39,373
No. Of course not.
121
00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:40,741
He's just here
On vacation.
122
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,410
Sure, he's always joking
123
00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:45,245
About how he's going to
Steal me away from you,
124
00:05:45,312 --> 00:05:46,980
But he's only kidding.
125
00:05:48,449 --> 00:05:49,950
Are you sure?
126
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:53,053
Henri, you're going
To love this.
127
00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:54,788
Woody thinks
You really are
128
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:57,391
Trying to steal me
Away from him.
129
00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:59,660
Oh. Ha ha ha!
130
00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:02,362
Oh, that's so funny.
131
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,666
I am, you know.
132
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,102
Right out
From under your nose.
133
00:06:10,571 --> 00:06:13,607
See how he is, woody?
He really cracks me up.
134
00:06:13,674 --> 00:06:16,143
Yeah. That's a good one.
135
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:20,548
I got one for you, henri.
136
00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:22,883
Get your hands
Off my girlfriend.
137
00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:25,886
Henri, if you'll
Excuse us a moment...
138
00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:29,490
Woody, I think you were
A little rude to henri
Just now.
139
00:06:29,557 --> 00:06:32,392
I think henri was
A little rude, too.
140
00:06:32,460 --> 00:06:34,728
He's supposed to
Be rude. He's french.
141
00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:37,998
I'm sam malone,
By the way.
142
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:40,468
Oh! I've heard about you
In france.
143
00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:41,969
Oh, yeah.
You follow baseball?
144
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:42,970
No.
145
00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:43,971
Stewardesses.
146
00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:45,439
Ah.
147
00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,877
When I first came in,
148
00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:52,145
I was afraid
That you were woody,
149
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:55,849
But then when I
Saw the real thing,
I was most relieved.
150
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,818
Why is that?
151
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,286
No competition.
152
00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:00,654
I could steal kelly
153
00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:04,024
With both hands
Tied behind my back.
154
00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:05,025
Ooh.
155
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:11,799
Listen...
156
00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:13,200
Kelly's
Woody's girlfriend.
157
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:16,470
I'm sure you could have
Any woman you wanted.
158
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:22,209
I know, but, uh, kelly
Is so innocent and naive.
159
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:24,277
I love to change that.
160
00:07:24,344 --> 00:07:27,347
Boy, I'm kind
Of torn here.
161
00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:29,282
I mean, woody's
My closest friend,
162
00:07:29,349 --> 00:07:32,486
But that is
A real solid argument.
163
00:07:37,525 --> 00:07:39,860
You know, woody may
Surprise you there.
164
00:07:39,927 --> 00:07:41,862
You know, he looks
Like a pushover,
165
00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:43,731
But he's got his way
With women.
166
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,999
Oh, no, I've been shot
Through the head!
167
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:48,035
I've been shot
Through the head!
168
00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,104
I'll take my chances.
169
00:07:59,079 --> 00:08:03,584
Come on, woody. Woody,
How about this one?
170
00:08:03,651 --> 00:08:04,585
Knock, knock.
171
00:08:04,652 --> 00:08:06,086
Who's there?
172
00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:08,922
Henri, the guy
Who's going to steal
Your girlfriend.
173
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:12,292
Now, henri,
174
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:14,027
This is getting
A little tiresome.
175
00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:15,095
Oh?
176
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:18,498
I'm kidding.
It's really cute.
177
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,034
Oh.
178
00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,771
Woody, why don't you
Get us some drinks?
179
00:08:25,105 --> 00:08:26,506
Three sodas, sam.
180
00:08:26,574 --> 00:08:27,841
You know, woody,
181
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,476
I'd watch out
For that guy
If I were you.
182
00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:31,478
Oh, I know
He's annoying, carla,
183
00:08:31,545 --> 00:08:32,880
But kelly swears
184
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:35,816
He's just joking around
To get my goat.
185
00:08:35,883 --> 00:08:38,251
I don't think he's joking
Around there, woody.
186
00:08:38,318 --> 00:08:39,653
I don't think so,
Either.
187
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:41,221
I mean, the french
Aren't exactly known
188
00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:42,790
For their
Sense of humor.
189
00:08:43,657 --> 00:08:44,892
What do you mean?
190
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:46,894
Well, let me
Put it this way--
191
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:50,297
Their, uh,
Comic hero
Is jerry lewis.
192
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,768
What's your point?
193
00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,773
Yeah.
What's your point?
194
00:09:01,609 --> 00:09:03,076
Oh, henri,
That's impossible.
195
00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:04,511
No one can do that.
196
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:07,080
No, it's true.
I'll show you.
197
00:09:07,147 --> 00:09:08,448
What are you guys doing?
198
00:09:08,515 --> 00:09:09,850
Henri says
He can teach me
199
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:13,453
To tie a knot
In a cherry stem
With my tongue.
200
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:14,855
Here.
We'll demonstrate.
201
00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:17,124
I'll be
The cherry stem.
202
00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:19,326
Hold it. Hold it.
That's it, frogman.
203
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,028
Get away
From my girlfriend.
204
00:09:22,129 --> 00:09:23,831
I know
What you're thinking.
205
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,933
You're thinking
You're more
Sophisticated than me
206
00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:28,535
And classier than me
And smarter than me
207
00:09:28,602 --> 00:09:30,938
And that you got
Better hair than mine
208
00:09:31,004 --> 00:09:32,940
And that
You're taller than me,
209
00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:35,275
And you got
That strong jawline.
210
00:09:36,343 --> 00:09:38,879
What was my point?
211
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:39,680
Oh, yeah.
212
00:09:39,747 --> 00:09:41,048
You get out of here
213
00:09:41,114 --> 00:09:44,551
Before I kick your butt
Back to the eiffel tower!
214
00:09:44,618 --> 00:09:46,153
Very well.
215
00:09:46,219 --> 00:09:47,988
But I do feel
216
00:09:48,055 --> 00:09:50,624
I should be allowed
To say something
In my defense.
217
00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:52,159
Go ahead.
218
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:55,095
I'm going to steal
Your girlfriend.
219
00:10:15,315 --> 00:10:17,685
I can't believe kelly
Would be so mad at me
220
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,386
Just because I stood up
To henri.
221
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:22,690
It's like she's starting to
Like him better than me.
222
00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:26,393
Hey, sam,
You don't think that...
223
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:29,462
Maybe they've been to...
224
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:31,865
To...The back
Of the barn?
225
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:35,335
I was going to say
To bed together.
226
00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:41,742
What is the back
Of the barn?
What does that mean?
227
00:10:43,176 --> 00:10:46,346
That's--that's where
The compost heap is.
228
00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:55,155
I can't think
Of anyplace
Less romantic.
229
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,096
Back of the...
230
00:11:04,631 --> 00:11:07,167
I don't think
They've slept together
Yet, woody,
231
00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:09,636
But I would be
Concerned about henri.
232
00:11:09,703 --> 00:11:11,171
I mean,
I know guys like this.
233
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:14,374
I mean, I am
A guy like this.
234
00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:17,377
What can I do,
Sam?
235
00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:19,579
Well, how's--how's
Your love life,
236
00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,181
I mean,
The physical part?
237
00:11:21,248 --> 00:11:22,816
Well, I can't
Speak for kelly,
238
00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:25,085
But I'm looking
Forward to it.
239
00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,725
You're telling me
240
00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,961
That you and kelly
Haven't slept together?
241
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:37,697
Well, we did once
When we went
To see"Old gringo,"
242
00:11:37,765 --> 00:11:39,933
But the whole row
Was snoring.
243
00:11:44,404 --> 00:11:48,608
Well, you know,
I think this may be
Your problem here, wood.
244
00:11:48,675 --> 00:11:50,744
Well...
245
00:11:50,811 --> 00:11:51,912
I always figured
We'd wait
246
00:11:51,979 --> 00:11:53,313
Until after
We were married.
247
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,816
That's the way
Everybody in hanover
Does it,
248
00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:57,084
Except
For that couple
249
00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:59,753
That teaches art
At the high school.
250
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:05,158
I think
Waiting for marriage
Is a wonderful idea.
251
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:06,493
I wish I had.
252
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,696
I also wish
That I'd studied
Harder in college
253
00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:12,165
And maybe gone for
A different career.
254
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:13,834
Maybe engineering.
255
00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:17,137
And you know, boston
Was a bad move.
256
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:22,309
And then, of course,
You can't choose
Your own parents,
257
00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:23,710
But if I could have,
258
00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:24,778
I would have
Chosen two
259
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:25,979
That were
More supportive,
260
00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:27,447
You know,
Like brian keith
261
00:12:27,514 --> 00:12:31,451
And maureen o'hara
In"The parent trap."
262
00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:34,121
Woody,
Is this helping you?
263
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:35,588
Well, even if it isn't,
264
00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:38,325
Just thinking about"The
Parent trap"For a moment
265
00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:39,793
Made me feel good.
266
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:51,905
What do you think
About premarital sex,
Mr. P?
267
00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:54,007
Well, wood, there's
An old saying--
268
00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:56,176
You know,
"Why buy the cow
269
00:12:56,243 --> 00:12:58,211
When you can get
The milk for free?"
270
00:12:59,746 --> 00:13:01,748
Then, of course,
You get married,
271
00:13:01,815 --> 00:13:03,550
And you
Wake up one day
272
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:08,421
And realize,
"Oh, my god,
I've married a cow."
273
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:21,969
Thanks, mr. P.
274
00:13:23,203 --> 00:13:25,138
Hey, sam,
What if we do it
275
00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:27,140
And it becomes
Like a crutch
276
00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:29,309
And we rely on it
For the rest of
Our lives?
277
00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:31,578
Well, then you know
You did it right.
278
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:35,248
But you better hurry,
Or henri's going to
Beat you to it.
279
00:13:37,184 --> 00:13:38,318
All right.
280
00:13:38,385 --> 00:13:40,253
I'm going to go
Through with it.
281
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:41,254
All right.
282
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:42,222
Yeah. Right.
283
00:13:42,289 --> 00:13:43,957
If it's
Going to happen,
284
00:13:44,024 --> 00:13:45,825
It's got
To be wonderful.
285
00:13:45,893 --> 00:13:47,727
Where can we go?
We can't go
To her place
286
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:49,062
Because
Her dad's home.
287
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:51,798
Well, then, why don't you
Go to a motel?
288
00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:54,501
This is all
Second nature to you,
289
00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:55,936
Isn't it, sam?
290
00:14:06,013 --> 00:14:07,614
Look at him, will you?
291
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,616
Walking out of here a boy.
292
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:11,618
He's going to come back...
293
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:13,386
A happy boy.
294
00:14:14,754 --> 00:14:15,822
Everyone,
295
00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:18,791
This is
Dr. Eugene eckworth,
296
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:21,328
A renowned scientist
And surgeon,
297
00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:24,064
A man who
Not only believes
In cryogenics,
298
00:14:24,131 --> 00:14:26,333
But has
Just performed
The procedure
299
00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:28,401
You all scorned
So zestfully.
300
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,203
Yes. I am in the process
301
00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:32,505
Of transferring one
Of our thermostatic clients
302
00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:33,740
To a storage facility.
303
00:14:33,806 --> 00:14:37,444
My good friend frasier asked
Me to stop by for a drink.
304
00:14:40,914 --> 00:14:42,115
You're telling me
305
00:14:42,182 --> 00:14:44,651
You brought
A severed head
Into the bar?
306
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:47,554
We got to have
A policy against
That, don't we?
307
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:49,189
Hey.
308
00:14:49,256 --> 00:14:50,757
Don't worry.
It's frozen.
309
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:54,161
It's not like
It's going to go bad
Or anything.
310
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:57,030
Say, a game of pool, gene?
311
00:14:57,097 --> 00:14:58,231
You can leave
The head there.
312
00:14:58,298 --> 00:15:00,500
Oh, that's
Just fine.
313
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:03,536
Ooh. Weird-looking box.
314
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:04,904
What's in there?
315
00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:06,506
Um, I don't know.
316
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,241
Why don't you look?
317
00:15:08,308 --> 00:15:09,042
Ok.
318
00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:10,443
No, no.
Don't do that.
319
00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:12,912
There's a frozen
Severed head
In that thing.
320
00:15:12,980 --> 00:15:16,116
Oh, give me
A break, sam.
321
00:15:16,183 --> 00:15:18,285
She's right.
There's no head in there.
322
00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:19,953
Then why doesn't
Somebody open it?
323
00:15:20,020 --> 00:15:23,156
You're kind of
In charge of all the
Body parts around here,
324
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:25,025
Aren't you, sam?
325
00:15:25,092 --> 00:15:26,426
All right.
Well, uh...
326
00:15:26,493 --> 00:15:29,029
I'll open it up,
Take a quick look,
327
00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:30,263
See that there's
No head in there,
328
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:32,899
And then I'll just
Shut it up again.
329
00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:33,900
Ok.
330
00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:35,368
This is--
331
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:43,910
Well?
332
00:15:43,977 --> 00:15:45,912
I can't see
Anything in there.
333
00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,480
Help me.
334
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:48,481
Aah!
Aah!
335
00:15:52,085 --> 00:15:55,655
Well, look
Who's laughing now, huh?
336
00:15:55,722 --> 00:15:59,726
Help me. Help me.
337
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:03,463
You guys
Are running away
From a tape recorder.
338
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:06,033
Cliff, I must admit
That was funny.
339
00:16:06,099 --> 00:16:07,500
Thanks a lot, gene.
340
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:08,568
No problem, frase.
341
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,003
Take care.
342
00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:12,272
Hey, doc, that was great.
Congratulations.
343
00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:14,941
We make a good team,
You and me.
We showed them.
344
00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,676
Hey, how would you like
345
00:16:16,743 --> 00:16:19,346
To play a trick like
That on somebody else
Tomorrow, huh?
346
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:20,647
Wouldn't that be great?
347
00:16:20,713 --> 00:16:22,882
Lot of people
I'd like to get even with--
348
00:16:22,949 --> 00:16:25,218
Guys down at
The post office,
349
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,487
All the people
In my apartment complex.
350
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:30,690
Ma. Ooh, I'd love
To nail her.
351
00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:32,759
Help me.
352
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:44,604
Well, here's your room,
Mr. And mrs. Malone.
353
00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:49,742
Well, thank you.
354
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:52,979
My wife and I really enjoy
Getting away from the kids
355
00:16:53,046 --> 00:16:54,614
For a relaxing
Evening.
356
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:55,948
By the way, honey,
357
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:57,650
Shouldn't we call
The babysitter
358
00:16:57,717 --> 00:17:00,587
And tell her there's some
Chicken in the fridge?
359
00:17:00,653 --> 00:17:02,589
The little woman's
A great cook.
360
00:17:02,655 --> 00:17:06,159
Almost makes putting up
With the mother-in-law
Worthwhile.
361
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:08,061
You two aren't married,
Are you?
362
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:10,197
No.
363
00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:15,068
Gee. You really had me
Going there for a while.
364
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:28,748
Well...
365
00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:30,983
This is it.
366
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:34,621
Just you and me
Alone together.
367
00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:39,058
So, uh, what
Should we do first?
368
00:17:40,827 --> 00:17:42,562
We could kiss.
369
00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:46,333
Yeah. We've done that
Lots of times.
370
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:47,334
Yeah.
371
00:18:16,963 --> 00:18:21,000
Boy, I've never felt
This self-conscious
About kissing.
372
00:18:21,067 --> 00:18:22,869
My lips feel huge.
373
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:28,708
Well, they've
Always been full.
374
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:29,909
Really? They feel
375
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:33,613
Like two big
Pieces of liver
Slapping together.
376
00:18:37,984 --> 00:18:40,520
Oh, no.
I can hardly talk.
377
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:45,658
Woody,
I think we're both
A little bit nervous.
378
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,294
So why don't we...
379
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,362
Lie down and relax?
380
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:50,397
Ok?
381
00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:04,544
Hmm...
382
00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:07,614
Hmm...
383
00:19:09,516 --> 00:19:10,383
Oh...Hey,
384
00:19:10,450 --> 00:19:13,320
This is one of those
Vibrating beds.
385
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:15,455
I always wanted
To try this.
386
00:19:17,324 --> 00:19:19,859
Oh, darn.
I dropped the quarter.
387
00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:21,194
I have another quarter.
388
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:22,862
No, I'll get it.
389
00:19:28,935 --> 00:19:30,437
I'll turn it off.
390
00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:37,477
Boy, I don't know why
People like this.
391
00:19:45,352 --> 00:19:48,555
Let me kiss
Your head, woody.
392
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:51,224
Does that feel better?
393
00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:54,594
Yeah, that feels
A lot better.
394
00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:55,895
[knock on door]
395
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,430
Oh, no.
It's the manager.
396
00:19:57,497 --> 00:19:59,866
He figured out
We're not married.
397
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,603
Woody, you told him
We're not married.
398
00:20:03,670 --> 00:20:06,673
Then I guess it was easy
For him to piece together.
399
00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:07,940
[knock knock]
400
00:20:08,007 --> 00:20:09,942
Carla: woody,
Open the door!
401
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:14,080
Carla,
What are you
Doing here?
402
00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:15,482
Good. You're
Still dressed.
403
00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,750
Thank god
I'm not too late.
404
00:20:17,817 --> 00:20:20,587
I knew I would find
You guys here.
405
00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:22,255
I got to talk
To you guys
406
00:20:22,322 --> 00:20:23,623
Before you make
What could be
407
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:26,058
The worst mistake
Of your lives.
408
00:20:26,125 --> 00:20:27,994
What's she
Talking about, woody?
409
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:30,263
I'm talking about
You two getting
Together
410
00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:33,065
In this motel room
For all
The wrong reasons.
411
00:20:33,132 --> 00:20:36,202
She's talking about
The two of us getting
Together in this motel room
412
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:38,605
For all
The wrong reasons.
413
00:20:39,972 --> 00:20:40,907
Kids...
414
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:48,348
Making love...
415
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:52,251
Is a very special thing
Between two people.
416
00:20:53,286 --> 00:20:55,755
You don't want
To throw that away
417
00:20:55,822 --> 00:20:59,959
Just so you can beat some
Frenchman to the punch.
418
00:21:00,026 --> 00:21:01,328
Believe me.
419
00:21:01,394 --> 00:21:06,333
I came to this motel
When I was 16 years old.
420
00:21:06,399 --> 00:21:08,401
You know what happened?
421
00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:11,338
I got knocked up.
422
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:12,939
And, uh...
423
00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:14,341
Here I am--
424
00:21:14,407 --> 00:21:15,808
Eight kids later--
425
00:21:15,875 --> 00:21:20,212
Trying to talk you kids out
Of making the same mistake.
426
00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:21,481
Carla's right.
427
00:21:21,548 --> 00:21:24,150
When it happens,
It has to be special.
428
00:21:24,216 --> 00:21:28,321
It has to be
The most meaningful
Thing in the whole world.
429
00:21:28,388 --> 00:21:31,624
You know,
If it were up to me...
430
00:21:31,691 --> 00:21:34,727
I--I think
We should wait.
431
00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:36,929
You mean
Until we're married?
432
00:21:36,996 --> 00:21:42,134
No. Until I can
Afford a nice room
At the four seasons
433
00:21:42,201 --> 00:21:43,936
Instead of some
Cheap motel.
434
00:21:44,003 --> 00:21:45,171
No offense, carla.
435
00:21:45,237 --> 00:21:49,041
I know this place
Has sentimental
Meaning to you.
436
00:21:49,108 --> 00:21:50,443
Let's go.
437
00:21:51,678 --> 00:21:54,547
Boy,
I'm glad I could
Help you guys.
438
00:21:54,614 --> 00:21:57,484
I don't know how
To thank you, carla.
439
00:21:57,550 --> 00:21:59,085
Yeah. It's ok.
440
00:22:03,756 --> 00:22:07,293
See, I told you
I could get us
A vacancy.
441
00:22:07,360 --> 00:22:08,961
Come on, frenchie.
442
00:22:15,368 --> 00:22:17,069
Here's your big chance.
443
00:22:18,371 --> 00:22:20,607
Steal me away from woody.
444
00:22:26,446 --> 00:22:29,982
Hey, doc,
Where is everybody?
445
00:22:30,049 --> 00:22:31,384
Seen norm?
446
00:22:31,451 --> 00:22:33,019
Well, cliff...
447
00:22:33,085 --> 00:22:34,421
Norm was pretty upset
448
00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:37,857
About our little
Severed head gag
This afternoon.
449
00:22:37,924 --> 00:22:41,428
He's been moping
In the poolroom all day.
450
00:22:41,494 --> 00:22:43,029
I...I don't know.
451
00:22:43,095 --> 00:22:44,431
Oh, yeah, yeah.
452
00:22:44,497 --> 00:22:46,733
It was meant
To be a joke.
453
00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:48,735
Hey, norm!
Come on out here
Will you?
454
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,637
I didn't mean
To scare you.
455
00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:53,139
You know, let me--
Let me go see if he's ok.
456
00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:58,545
Oh, my god!
457
00:23:00,146 --> 00:23:01,280
Cliffie!
458
00:23:01,347 --> 00:23:04,417
Aah! Aah!
459
00:23:09,656 --> 00:23:11,824
Aah!
460
00:23:16,996 --> 00:23:18,531
Very funny, frase.
461
00:23:18,598 --> 00:23:21,434
Hey, I go where
The thrills are.
32167
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