Original subtitles

2021 Class

Yo, what's up ? It's Lil Yachty from Atlanta, Georgia.

Um, I think what got me into taking this rap thing serious was,

growing up, my mom worked two jobs and I wanted to live above for once.

You know, provide for my family.

So, I think that's what really drove me to take this thing serious.

You already know. It's your boy, Desiigner, New York City.

And what really made me take my career serious was

when I was fourteen, I got shot.

For me, I was in the streets wilding;

doing things I wasn't supposed to do.

Seeing a vision, really started following it and here I am today.

Hey, Lil Dicky, I'm from Cheltenham, Pennsylvania

which is the first suburb right outside of Philadelphia.

It's a stone's throw away, honestly.

Two-minute drive you're in the city.

My childhood was ideal.

Like, I was very loved and respected by my friends and family.

How does it look ? Does he look too Jewish ?

Well, maybe I shouldn't say ideal, actually.

I think it's a little late to be asking that.

Too Jewish ? He don't even got the shit on his head or nothing.

There was a lot of body trauma, if I'm being honest with you.

A couple of procedures I wish I could have back, a second crack at,

but you live, and you learn, as they say.

And anyways, I went to college, University of Richmond,

and I graduated as the marketing student of the year.

And, actually, Business Week ranked my undergraduate program

as the number one undergraduate marketing program in America.

So, by the transitive property, I was incredibly well positioned,

and I got a job at an ad agency and

it was cool, you know, but it just like,

I've always felt like I was the one. Genuinely.

So, I went for it and here I am.

What was the question again ?

- You're doing commercials ? - Yeah, I have ten commercials on TV.

Geek, geek !

Yeah. Can we actually not that put that part in the edit ?

Who do I need to talk to about that ? I'd actually love to...

Just because I'm very careful about how I do my branding.

Hey ! Dave !

- It's just me. - Oh, hi.

Did you switch chairs with me ?

- You could interpret it that way. - Give it back.

- It sucks. - My back is broken.

- Well, you know. - Spinal. Mike Tyson.

I have no idea what that reference is. What you got for me ?

TD Ameritrade ? Sure. Let me pull up my list.

- Okay, so I've got one idea. - Just one ?

It's the best idea, probably, that's ever come out of this building so if...

Okay, let's hear it.

Would you be interested in hearing an idea like that ?

Great. Imagine driving down the street, right.

You look up, you see a billboard,

but there's a human being strapped to it,

like, actually up, strapped.

And it just says, "Strapped for cash ?

TD Ameritrade".

It's clean. It's simple. It's newsworthy.

I think reporters would report.

It's an online brokerage firm. They're not buying anything funny.

I don't know. I chose not to have any inhibitions and dream big.

Like, I'm not putting any unnecessary limitations on this.

The limitations are necessary or you're just wasting time.

Okay, number two on the list.

If you were to hear me say I'm dick-fingering a girl

in a song, how would you interpret that ?

That you're a loser.

'Cause every song is about sex. I've never heard such unique phrasing.

But no guy has ever said, "I want to dick-finger you".

Bingo. Exactly. Why would... That's first mover advantage.

Oh ! I figured out my rap name.

Oh, my God. What is it ?

Well, take a moment and really absorb this

because you're gonna probably replay this moment a couple of dozen times.

- Tell me. - Call me...

Norm Bender.

Norm Bender ?

Yeah if... As if my name were Norman 'cause I bend norms at every...

- Burd. - I'm Norm Bender.

Yeah, here, here, look. You done Chatroulette yet ?

Oh, yeah. Huh.

- I think I've seen this before. - Is this... This is the global, uh...

Yeah, you connect to a bunch of different people all over the world.

The guy's dick is made of meat.

Hey, what do you need from us ? Let's cream !

- Hold on. Alright, here we go. - Ah, I love my voice.

They keep nexting us but I'm ready to make him cream.

Hello, sir.

- Hey, how's it going ? - Just hanging out.

Are you my father ?

I don't think so.

Nice.

I'm just looking for people to talk to.

Oh, shit, Jeff.

So, we should work hard at this task. Did he see us ?

- Mm, I don't know. - It's fine.

Guys, I've done COC with one of the partners at the holiday party.

I'm not gonna say who, but trust me, we're good.

I've never done COC but... I'm on Adderall.

Oh, nice. Can I get some ?

Can't do it. My mom made me promise not to give any away.

Got it, got it, got it.

Of course. What about of course ?

"TD Ameritrade, of course".

Of course not. Maybe just think of it differently.

What kind of movies do you like ?

Uh, Warner Brothers. They're the most consistent.

Never mind.

Wow. Kanye's new album just dropped. Yeezus is here.

Yeezus is here ?

Isn't that the best title you've ever heard ? That's such a Kanye title.

So arrogant and lacking self-awareness. Very Kanye.

What on God's green Earth are we even talking about ?

If Kanye wasn't that way, he wouldn't even be Kanye.

He wouldn't even be a rapper. This is gonna hit me at the perfect time.

Every time I listen to him,

it's like there's nothing in my way and I can achieve all my dreams.

- Aw, is the world in your way ? - You got to understand.

I have always felt like I was the biggest star on the planet.

- You ? - Yeah, me.

I used to watch The Truman Show and think that that was me,

that everyone was watching me

because I was destined to provide entertainment for everybody.

And I still feel that way. And I'm gonna go for it fully.

I'm just waiting for my boat to hit the wall

like Jim Carrey's did at the end of the movie.

So, you've always been delusional ?

Or, I've always said that I can live with failure,

but I can't live with what-ifs.

Must be nice to live in a world where dreams don't have to be dreams.

Guys, seriously,

how am I still here right now, and you're playing fucking basketball ?

Sorry, Stephen. We're so sorry.

Our bad, Big Dog.

- That's, hmm... - Did you just call our boss Big Dog ?

I did, but it doesn't really matter. In five years,

he's gonna be remembering the time he had this conversation with me

when I was wasting my national treasure of a brain on TD Ameritrade.

This fucking sucks.

This must be exactly what Kanye felt like when he worked at the Gap.

I've hit a wall, I gotta go home.

You want to head out ?

I think I got a little bit more left in me, so I'm just gonna stick around,

but I'll see you tomorrow.

- All right. Good night, slug. - Goodnight, love you.

Love you.

I just need to clear my mind now

It's been racing since the summertime

Now I'm holding down a summer now

And all I want is what I can't buy now

Cause I ain't got the money on me right now

And I told you to wait

Yeah I told you to wait

Would be lost without me

We could've been somebody

Thought you'd be different 'bout it

We could've been somebody

Said you had to tell somebody

Let's take it back to the first party

I can't wait for this to be over. I'm so stressed about this cypher.

What ? LD you just made the Double X-L Freshman list.

You used to dream about that type of shit and you got bars.

Ain't nobody spitting like you.

If you want, there's a barber, you can get a haircut.

If that's... Does that help ?

I don't understand how we haven't gotten to beat yet.

How am I supposed to know how to rap if I don't know what we're rapping over.

Look around. You made it. If I would have told you this back in the cube...

- Fuck. - What ? This my song.

This song's so old.

This my shit right here, bro. LD !

We don't have to hear any more of this. Everyone's heard this before.

Hey, you doing some funny shit tomorrow, Lil Dicky ?

I don't think so, Lil Yachty. I feel like, I don't know.

I'm putting on my shit.

Power move.

- Yeah. - I respect that.

That's what's supposed to sound like. No doubt.

Hey, yo.

Respect you.

Uh, hey, we went to University of Richmond together,

believe it or not, same year. Yeah.

Seriously ? I don't remember you at all.

Yeah, I've... We probably had drastically different social groups.

- I got kicked out my freshman year. - I know. It was like...

- You made it through ? - I did.

I made it all the way, I graduated. I was actually the student of my year.

That's what's up.

But I remember when you got kicked out

because you were on the basketball team and it made me so upset

because the team I had had such hopes for that team,

and you were a big part of that puzzle.

When you got kicked out, it was like very... Uh, it was a bummer for me.

Obviously, I was upset for you as a man, primarily.

Your underwear is exposed.

Yo. Are you like, Lil Dicky girlfriend or something like that ?

Oh, hell no. He wishes. I just film him.

Oh you film ?

Oh, well, shit. I'm looking for a new director of my music video myself

'cause the last dude trashed it. Boom, man.

No, I just do it for fun, not for real.

I made his logos though.

Can I get those Takis though ?

- Yeah, sorry. - Thanks.

Okay, look at you over here, networking with Denzel Curry. Connecting the dots.

That's what I'm trying to do.

- I wouldn't call that networking. - Why not ? Look where we at.

I'm trying to get a verse from one of these rappers.

I need a manager, a publicist,

I'm trying to make something shake out here, Emma.

No, I'm not trying to be thirsty, you know ?

I'm not thirsty, I'm just hungry, man. I gotta eat.

Like, for real, don't be afraid.

We don't monitor, supervisor who... Nobody watching you, bruh ?

I feel you though, man. I used to be just like you, young out here lost,

fresh, wiggling, man for real, man. I used to be a kid too myself.

But it's gonna be all right, man. Just keep your head up, little homie.

- You gonna be straight. - Damian !

Sorry about that, y'all.

Damn, that's motivation right there. Real shit.

But I'm about to go get this Desiigner verse, though.

You see me ? I'm out here suited and booted. I gotta get it.

Uh-huh, yeah. No, yeah, I get it. But we need someone who knows this world.

Her ? I... I would not put her on it. No.

Yeah. Maybe Dan. Could work with Dan. Sure. All right.

I need you guys to help me out with some TV spots. What do you say ?

- TV ? - Great !

John and Vicky are out of the office this week.

So, can you guys work on the Mountain Dew campaign ?

- We absolutely can. - All right.

We've got an internal with Jeff tomorrow,

so why don't we circle back in the a.m. Cool ?

Oh, yes. I'd love to meet Jeff.

Have you guys ever done TV ?

- No. - Not yet.

Well, hopefully you'll do better than your Eagles did

against my New York football Giants last week.

Oh, my God. We literally had our third-string quarterback out there.

We were totally.... How are you bragging about that ? Get a grip.

I bet you guys wish you had Julio Jones. He's on my fantasy team.

He's leading the league in YAC yards so...

She's a Falcons fan.

Actually, YAC yards is, kind of, like saying yards after catch yards, so...

- Oh. - It's true.

Anyway, I will shoot Dave the brief and you guys will be off and running.

- Shoot it to me, captain. - Can you CC me ?

I can just forward it. Whatever's clever.

We are gonna kill this fucking... Sorry but we're going to kill this thing.

- Do it. - Thank you.

You won't regret it. Thank you !

Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew.

Do, do, do.

Hey, I got a buddy who loves shitting in the mall.

What's his favorite movie ?

What ?

Paul Fart Mall Poop.

Dave, it's way too late for that.

There's people out here, by the way, can we like... This is a little crazy.

I thought you were a competitor. I want to see what these doofuses got.

See what we're up against.

Mountain doofus. I'm excited to get in front of Jeff.

That guy's got such a presence to him.

Well, that's what happens when you own an ad agency.

Ooh, let me check Adrian's office and see what they're pitching.

Why do you care so much about this ? It's like, tragic.

Because making commercials is so much cooler than dumb-ass billboards.

I've been waiting over a year to make TV spots.

So, if you could do whatever you want in life, you would, what,

make Super Bowl commercials ?

If I could do anything. I'd direct movies.

What ? How have I never heard this before ?

I just don't feel like it's a real job.

What do you mean ? It's definitely a real job.

- Every movie you see has a director. - I understand how it works, Dave.

It's just, ninety-nine percent of directors don't make it.

- Yeah, but what if you're the one... ? - Can you just help me ?

Don't be such a buzzkill. This is a rebellious brand. You know ?

You got to unleash me here.

You'd be surprised what they're probably capable of doing.

Please allow me to unleash my inner Kanye on this fucking shit.

Okay.

Okay. What ?

So, I'd be rapping, rapping, rapping.

Swagger, charisma, all that, hopefully.

Go around, I guess, over and over until the song is done. I don't know.

But don't you think all these people have to turn their heads to see you ?

I didn't think about that.

I think you should go under the table. It'll be so sick. Come through here.

- Like, crawl ? - Yeah, and then rap here, rap here.

And then you'll be in the middle performing.

You want me to crawl under the table in front of Jeff ?

Yeah. Look here, I'll show you because you can't see.

I'm rapping. I'm rapping. You have no idea what I'm doing.

- I shoot through the table like a rat. - Yeah, down.

Then I'm up here, and then they're... Wow ! And then I'm here.

- And then everyone's staring at us. - Then head over here.

Yeah, I could even high-five people if I wanted to.

- Yes. - Is that ? How does it look ?

- Cut. - Cut.

- Look. - Oh, that's way sicker.

- Right ? - Yeah, I like that a lot.

And then I'll design some awesome graphics on the TV.

Slug ? Will you direct my real music videos

when I make them when I'm a real rapper ?

Definitely, slug. Hey, but don't get too... aw, you giving me a hug ?

- Yeah. - Aw. Don't get too excited, okay ?

It's going to be an all-nighter. Write your rap and I'll work on the visuals.

- All-nighter ? - Yep.

I've never pulled one of those before.

- Ever ? - Ever.

The latest I've ever stayed up: three-forty-five a.m.

New York City, am I right ?

Fuck. They got strip clubs out there.

- Yeah. - Got one night to write a rap ?

That's fine. I thrive in the face of pressure.

I better drink some fucking Mountain Dew if I'm gonna...

Caffeinate. Go for it.

Oh, my God !

You're supposed to do that with an empty can.

- Are you okay ? - Yeah, I'm fine.

Please, I can't be touched.

Hey, Cheri, just following up to see if we could get that beat for the cypher,

because LD is big on prep.

It's just not something we do. We never give it out in advance.

Yeah, I hear that, but think about today, culturally,

that might be like a past type of way of thinking, you know ?

Like, shouldn't we be uplifting everyone and celebrating this talent

and showcase it, not pitting everyone at odds,

especially with social ongoings,

and like the... like, today ?

We really just want to be prepared and it's not a competition,

so if we get the beat early, everybody wins.

This is a competition. That's the point of it.

Look, a lot of times people just use verses from unreleased songs.

Hey, you know what ?

That's cool, but I don't really have any unreleased verses

so that's just not something I can tap into, unfortunately.

And if I could, I probably wouldn't be revealing it for the first time

over a beat I've never heard to America, you know what I mean ?

- See you tomorrow, Dave. - So, if we can just talk about --

Fuck ! Great. I'm gonna be up the entire night

writing some verse that can fit over any beat tempo that's ever existed.

Bro, that's what rappers do, bro. You got it. Game six.

Seven. It's seven, Gata. Who says six ? That's... What are you talking about ?

Oh, no. He closing down in six, bro. Icons can do anything.

Jordan playing baseball. You know what I'm saying ? Bo Jackson did it all.

- You got it. - Ants.

It's gonna work out like it always does.

You're born to do this, remember ?

Black coffee, almond milk for the all-night woman.

Black coffee can't have milk.

- What am I adding the milk to then ? - Coffee.

It feels racial.

Wanna know another fun fact ?

I've never actually rapped in front of anybody before ever.

Wait, are you nervous ?

Look, I don't know. Fuck. Jeff's an intimidating guy.

And this is all coming kind of quickly, and I just want to make sure I'm ready.

Dave, if you want to be a rapper, you'll have to do this eventually.

You might as well pop your cherry in front of a bunch of White dudes

who won't even know what's cool or not.

- It's gonna be cool. - You're gonna be fine.

- Absolutely. - You got this.

Speaking of which, Stephen, we got quite the pitch for Mountain Dew today.

- Yes, we do. - Oh, fuck. I'm sorry.

John and Vicky actually sent some stuff in.

- Aren't they on vacation ? - Yeah.

Yeah, they are fucking rock stars.

Anyway, we've got enough manpower on Dew,

so why don't you guys get back to work on TDA ?

Whoa, so we're not doing any TV commercials ?

Can we just give you the elevator pitch ?

Don't even worry about it just... TDA, guys. Thanks.

Fuck this fucking place.

Shit.

- Long night last night ? - Yeah.

Oh I think I just saw your father in conference room two.

Sony's here. Everybody's Asian. It's crazy.

Slug, let's win the Mountain Dew pitch today.

Did you just snort Adderall ? We're not even in the meeting.

So what ? Let's just fucking crash it. Who cares ?

Just went in the... ? You can't. That's not... That would never fly.

Aren't you the one who said you can live with failure, not with what-ifs ?

- That was I. - Their tagline is "Do the Dew".

- It is. I feel you. - They're all about doing.

We gotta just do it. You know ?

You're treading into Nike territory, but fuck yeah, I'm down.

- How do we ? Fuck. That's a... - Fuck yeah.

- I love that shit. - Fuck it up.

Do you have the music ? Okay, that's a lot.

But yes I'm ready, uh...

- Ready, baby ? - Let's go !

Bro, you didn't tell me they had DJ Drama here today, bro.

You know it's about to go up, bro. You gotta snap, dawg. For real.

You know who that is, right ?

Gata, he doesn't need the pressure right now, man, just...

- He'll bust again. - I know, bro, but not now.

Hey.

- Check your phone. - What ?

Check your phone. I was just flirting with the DJ. I texted you the beat.

You're welcome.

Hey, Gata, I want to direct one of your videos.

You serious ? But you know I ain't got money for no music video.

- It's fine. I just want to do shit. - You for real ?

- Yeah. - Ooh, shit !

This about to up my gander for real.

This is big time, like top tier. You really 'bout to do this shit for me ?

- Where's Lil Dicky ? - I don't know.

I'm not even sure.

Anyone got eyes on Dicky ?

New crib doesn't have a driveway

Still pulling out when I fuck by the fireplace

I might be hip-hop Ryan Gosling

I don't want to think about It's just too exhausting

Kissing on your baby Like a boy politician

I'm tough shit like overcooked chicken

Huh bite the lip Won't take no rent

Show Hollywood What you and I like

Pronouns, girls wanna go out White

Snow owl hair so straight

Blow out, touchdown, score, no tow out

Wouldn't mind telling me I'm loud as fuck

Made stop, coming back, turn down for what

They hopped in a motherfucking crowded bus

That Lil Dicky got double excel, huh Yes !

Hey, Dave.

Keep in mind, your clothes are really dark so don't lose your light.

- Every rapper has a spotlight. - I'm gonna do it how I'm gonna do it.

I have to.

Seven, eight.

Rolling. Quiet, y'all.

Clear rolling set off.

This is what he do. You can't like spin like him. He gonna be good.

Dave East, you're up.

You all ready ? Let's do this shit.

Yo, this slow ass beat ain't it, man.

What you are playing man ? Hey, yo this shit.

That's whack. Speed it up, bro.

I got a different one. I got... I got something else.

- I need something else. - Yeah.

Yeah.

Thank you, man.

Ah, one, two. One, two. One, two.

Yo I put one up in the sky Til the day that I die

I'm the best rapper alive

That was really good.

That was really good.

- Lil Dicky ? - Me ?

- You're up. - Okay.

Alright, yeah, I'll take your word for it.

New crib doesn't have a driveway

Still pulling out when I fuck by the fireplace

I might be hip-hop Ryan Gosling I don't--

Hey, can we start that over ? Can we just run it back ?

Yeah. Run that back for me. Thanks.

New crib doesn't have a driveway

Still pulling out when I fuck

Didn't do the vocal warm-ups that I do.

Here we go.

New crib doesn't have a driveway

Still pulling out when I fuck by the fireplace

I might be hip-hop Ryan Gosling

I don't like to think about it It's just too exhausting

So fast, fast.

Start it over. Start it over.

I'm just trying to get the hang of this new beat !

Can you just don't come so close ? Thanks.

Can we go back to the, the first beat ?

Everyone has to have the same one, otherwise it wouldn't cut together.

Right. And, and you won't to do yours again to the slower beat, no ?

- No, I'm good. - Okay.

Adapt, adapt, adapt. You can play it. Start it up.

Why, why, why, why, why, why, why ?

Mountain Dew is current, it's exciting,

it's iconic, it's pure energy in a bottle

or, or a can. Yeah.

That's why we're telling the world to "Grab a Mountain Dew and charge up !"

Jeff, we're just blue-skying right now, but happy to hear your thoughts.

- We can circle back at the- - Hold on. There's one more.

Wait, what - are you... ? - Trust me.

You guys are gonna love this.

- Hi. Hello. - Hi.

How's it going ? You guys are here for the Mountain Dew pitch, right ?

You can sit. I figured it all out.

Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew

Drink, chug, do the Dew everyone

Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew

What would you do to do what you want It's done

Did you have a good time listening to everybody silly ideas about soda ?

Aw man party's over Dis the closer

Let me just demonstrate this further

Just imagine there's a commercial And there's a rapper about your work

And he's gonna, like, gentlemen, would you like a Mountain Dew ?

Steph, would you like a Mountain Dew ? Jeff, would you like a Mountain Dew ?

Steve I don't know about you I'm just kidding but, Jeff,

look at the can, look at me, dance Look at the man, Jeff

I'm looking pretty on brand They got supply board

This is the man, Jeff

The kids will post this on the Gram Tag all their friends

By the end of the night They'll be like Sprite, who ?

We make up a dance Man where does it end ?

You gotta trot over and get us a motherfucking drinks

Put it in a can, great, done

By the way hi I'm Dave While I have your attention

yI sit over there in the cube in the pit

I'm a genius I should probably get more opps

Underutilized as fuck But I guess today it stops

Maybe not, it depends if management can open their eyes a little

I'm just messing, Steven But clearly I'm a leader of thought

No ?

Look what I've done Okay I'm done, you can stop it.

You can stop the music.

Stop the music.

- Thank you, guys, so much. - That was awesome.

You know what ? Let's fast-track this and lock in a rapper.

I think he could run point on that.

What's your name again ?

Norm Bender.

It's Dave. My name's Dave.

So you prefer Dave or Norm Bender ?

Dave.

Oh, and give it up for Emma. She did all the visuals.

They're kinda cool, right ? Did you guys... You didn't see them ?

I might be hip-hop Ryan Gosling

I don't like to think about it too exhausting... Only...

Fuck ! Sorry.

No crib.

Kissing on your baby Like a politician

I don't... I'm sorry.

Okay, you know what ?

I think we have enough to stitch something out of it so you can stop.

Can I just take five ? I'm sorry, I just need five minutes.

Thank you so much. I just need five minutes. Thank you.