All language subtitles for Lucky.Hank.S01E07.WEBRip.x264-ION10

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian Download
ca Catalan Download
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian Download
ga Irish
it Italian Download
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian Download
ru Russian Download
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,544 --> 00:00:05,047 So it's the middle of the night, and, uh, I'm naked, 2 00:00:05,047 --> 00:00:06,424 I'm in a museum, 3 00:00:06,424 --> 00:00:08,718 I'm surrounded by these Roman statues, right, 4 00:00:08,718 --> 00:00:11,095 and I realize I have to take a leak, 5 00:00:11,095 --> 00:00:12,638 so I go to the bathroom, 6 00:00:12,638 --> 00:00:15,725 and Rodin's Thinking Guy, right, 7 00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,352 he's either there already, or he followed me in. 8 00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:20,104 - Uh-huh. - I'm trying to take a leak, 9 00:00:20,104 --> 00:00:22,064 but he's staring at me, 10 00:00:22,314 --> 00:00:25,151 and then, suddenly, the statue starts to pee. 11 00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:26,527 I mean, like, 12 00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:30,489 the longest, loudest pee you've ever heard, like Vesuvius. 13 00:00:30,489 --> 00:00:32,575 Like Niagara. 14 00:00:32,575 --> 00:00:34,076 I mean, he's mocking me. 15 00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:36,495 I get no relief, not even in my sleep. 16 00:00:38,456 --> 00:00:39,749 I'm kind of clogged up. 17 00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,547 Wow. Wow, loud. 18 00:00:46,964 --> 00:00:49,425 That was much louder than I thought it was going to be. 19 00:00:49,425 --> 00:00:52,470 It was exactly as loud as I thought it would be. 20 00:00:53,345 --> 00:00:56,640 Did you look at the apartments I sent you? 21 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,893 Yeah, whatever you want's fine. 22 00:00:58,893 --> 00:01:00,978 But I want you to feel like it's your place, too. 23 00:01:01,896 --> 00:01:04,064 You don't have any preferences? 24 00:01:04,190 --> 00:01:06,233 I... I don't know, 25 00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:08,152 a place with some nature around it, 26 00:01:08,152 --> 00:01:09,987 and a view of the river? 27 00:01:09,987 --> 00:01:12,323 - You know anything like that? - I'm off. 28 00:01:13,157 --> 00:01:15,075 Did you just give me the cheek? 29 00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:17,369 I haven't brushed. 30 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:19,705 Uh-uh, not today. 31 00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:22,666 Okay. 32 00:01:22,666 --> 00:01:25,252 I will call you from New York. 33 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:27,588 - I love you. - You too. 34 00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:31,842 No jail this time. 35 00:01:32,968 --> 00:01:34,428 Ha! 36 00:01:35,846 --> 00:01:37,473 You're way too happy! 37 00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:46,292 Oh, good. 38 00:02:46,292 --> 00:02:47,793 Two jars of pickles. 39 00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:50,254 Which are the good ones? 40 00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,381 Hmm, what if I pick the wrong one? 41 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,634 Oh, forget it. 42 00:03:12,818 --> 00:03:14,778 Uh, yeah. The green pickles. 43 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:16,697 Green for good. 44 00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,616 Wait. No. Blue for better? 45 00:03:18,616 --> 00:03:20,117 Was that... 46 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,223 {\an8}Dad? 47 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:53,484 {\an8}Dad? 48 00:03:53,484 --> 00:03:56,153 I've saved the best for last for this date. 49 00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:57,655 Oh, I'm so glad! 50 00:03:57,655 --> 00:04:00,032 Yeah, yeah. I have to end it on-- 51 00:04:00,032 --> 00:04:01,784 {\an8}On a high note. 52 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:02,993 {\an8}Yeah, girl, absolutely. 53 00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,495 {\an8}What the hell? 54 00:04:04,495 --> 00:04:05,829 {\an8}I'm so happy about that. 55 00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:08,374 {\an8}- Hi, Julie. - Hi. 56 00:04:08,374 --> 00:04:10,084 {\an8}I've called you, like, five times. 57 00:04:10,084 --> 00:04:12,419 {\an8}I know. I can't find my phone. 58 00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,798 {\an8}This phone? 59 00:04:15,798 --> 00:04:16,882 {\an8}Oh, there it is. 60 00:04:16,882 --> 00:04:19,051 {\an8}- Thanks. - Yup. 61 00:04:19,051 --> 00:04:20,219 {\an8}Hey. 62 00:04:20,219 --> 00:04:21,887 {\an8}Has Russell been here at all? 63 00:04:21,887 --> 00:04:24,264 - I don't know, was he here? - Dad! 64 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,891 Focus. 65 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:28,310 Have you seen Russell in the past 24 hours? 66 00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:31,355 No. 67 00:04:31,355 --> 00:04:32,564 - Okay. - Something wrong? 68 00:04:32,982 --> 00:04:34,316 No. It's nothing. 69 00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:36,318 When does Mom get back? 70 00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:38,988 In a couple days, I think. 71 00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:43,951 Um... 72 00:04:44,535 --> 00:04:46,412 Russell didn't come home last night. 73 00:04:48,372 --> 00:04:49,498 Is that unusual? 74 00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:50,833 Yes. 75 00:04:50,833 --> 00:04:52,751 We're married. You were at the wedding. 76 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:55,796 You were so pretty. 77 00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,175 Well, did you call him? 78 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:03,595 You didn't think I'd try calling him? 79 00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:05,848 Well, do you want me to call him? 80 00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,349 Yeah, I guess. 81 00:05:07,349 --> 00:05:09,184 I'd like to know he's okay, and not, like, 82 00:05:09,184 --> 00:05:11,186 at the bottom of a lake somewhere. 83 00:05:11,186 --> 00:05:14,148 Are you guys fighting? 84 00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:16,483 We're kind of always fighting, but it's fine. 85 00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:18,485 Oh. 86 00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:20,487 I can't... I thought I had his contact. 87 00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:21,739 Do you have his number? 88 00:05:21,739 --> 00:05:23,949 Oh, my God. Okay. 89 00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:25,200 Forget it. 90 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,453 Thank you so much. 91 00:05:27,453 --> 00:05:28,704 Goodbye. 92 00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,581 Okay. Thank you. 93 00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:36,295 Oh, Jesus. 94 00:05:36,295 --> 00:05:37,504 Oh, sorry. 95 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,300 If you're here to slaughter my father, he's in the bedroom. 96 00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:42,718 Great. 97 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:50,017 Yeah, I get that about you. 98 00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,977 Yeah... 99 00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:53,854 - Ew. - Ah. 100 00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:56,065 I brought your stinkin' chainsaw back. 101 00:05:56,565 --> 00:05:57,941 Just put it on the bed. 102 00:05:57,941 --> 00:05:59,151 So you can spoon it? 103 00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:04,239 Are you depressed because you miss our friendship? 104 00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:11,038 Look... 105 00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:14,917 At the convention... 106 00:06:15,334 --> 00:06:16,585 Hmm. 107 00:06:19,630 --> 00:06:21,381 The people, 108 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,549 the meal. 109 00:06:25,594 --> 00:06:28,180 I... Uh... 110 00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:29,431 Sorry? 111 00:06:29,431 --> 00:06:31,642 I'm sorry. 112 00:06:31,642 --> 00:06:33,811 Nice apology. 113 00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:35,020 You can keep the chainsaw. 114 00:06:35,020 --> 00:06:36,814 - I don't want it. - It's an expensive one. 115 00:06:36,814 --> 00:06:38,899 - It's broken. - I know, but... 116 00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:44,780 Grab your loaf of bread. Let's get out of here. 117 00:06:44,780 --> 00:06:47,282 No, I want to see what happens to the pretty girl. 118 00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:49,118 She cheats on Massimo with T-bone. 119 00:06:49,118 --> 00:06:51,120 - Are you-- - Yeah. 120 00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:53,831 Here, come here. Take a look at these. 121 00:06:53,831 --> 00:06:55,874 I see. I see 'em. 122 00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:58,001 It's a white Trillium, or Trinity Flower. 123 00:06:58,001 --> 00:06:59,920 It's got three petals, one, two, three. 124 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,421 Okay. 125 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,881 They're really rare to find. 126 00:07:02,881 --> 00:07:03,966 Come on. 127 00:07:03,966 --> 00:07:05,676 Take a look. 128 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:10,139 The Native Americans use them for medicinal purposes. 129 00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:12,349 That's fine. 130 00:07:12,349 --> 00:07:14,309 Actually, they're considered endangered 131 00:07:14,309 --> 00:07:17,020 because they take up to 10 years to grow. 132 00:07:19,398 --> 00:07:21,567 - Beautiful. - I just said they were endangered. 133 00:07:21,567 --> 00:07:23,986 Oh. I wasn't really listening. 134 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:27,865 Okay. 135 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:32,161 Yeah, put it back 'cause that's how flowers work. 136 00:07:32,161 --> 00:07:33,287 Come on. 137 00:07:35,873 --> 00:07:37,875 You know how when Zelda and I got divorced, 138 00:07:37,875 --> 00:07:39,668 we each took a night table? 139 00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:41,879 I wasn't tracking that, but sure. 140 00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:44,339 So now she's remarried and wants the other night table, 141 00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:46,175 and I know it's putting a lot on furniture, 142 00:07:46,175 --> 00:07:48,343 but I kind of felt like we were still connected, 143 00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:50,554 like I wasn't sleeping alone. 144 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,390 I gave Lily the cheek the other day 145 00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:55,184 when she leaned in to kiss goodbye. 146 00:07:55,184 --> 00:07:56,894 So we're talking about you now? 147 00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:58,604 That's why I showed up. 148 00:07:58,604 --> 00:07:59,855 Okay, I had my time. 149 00:07:59,855 --> 00:08:01,815 So are you mad at her for leaving? 150 00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,109 I didn't think I was till I gave her the cheek, 151 00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:06,737 but I thought I was happy for her. 152 00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:09,072 Well, the lips know more than the brain. 153 00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:10,824 Yeah. 154 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,618 My anger has nowhere to go. 155 00:08:12,618 --> 00:08:14,203 It's unhoused. 156 00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,371 I'm like the Count of Monte Cristo, 157 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,874 but instead of plotting revenge for 40 years, 158 00:08:18,874 --> 00:08:21,543 I've been plotting a pointed conversation with my dad, 159 00:08:23,212 --> 00:08:26,298 and now the man that I wanted to confront is gone. 160 00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:30,260 Gone. It's like an action movie, 161 00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:31,929 where I go to punch a guy, 162 00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:34,348 and he ducks, and I hit the guy behind him, 163 00:08:34,348 --> 00:08:36,433 and then I'm feeling guilty, 164 00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:39,561 then the guy behind me whacks me in the back of the head. 165 00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:40,812 Look, I've been here. 166 00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:42,481 No one knows an existential hole 167 00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,274 like a divorced person. 168 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:46,151 Climbing out isn't easy. 169 00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:47,903 Start with one thing. 170 00:08:47,903 --> 00:08:48,987 Something simple. 171 00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:51,406 Could be as easy as just picking clothes up off the floor. 172 00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:53,325 Get it done. 173 00:08:53,325 --> 00:08:55,244 Notice the feeling. 174 00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:56,411 Tomorrow, you'll get two things. 175 00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:57,788 Come on. [claps] Be present. 176 00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:58,956 Close your eyes. 177 00:08:58,956 --> 00:09:00,832 First thing that comes up off the top of your head. 178 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:01,917 Close your eyes. 179 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:06,588 Um... Uh, my sink is leaking. 180 00:09:06,588 --> 00:09:09,132 The hose is broken. 181 00:09:09,341 --> 00:09:11,635 - You've got to get right on that. - I will. 182 00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:14,137 It'll get under your floorboards and cost you $15,000. 183 00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:15,931 - I will. - You'll get black mold under there. 184 00:09:15,931 --> 00:09:17,766 - What are you even doing here? - I'll go. 185 00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,851 We're walking around here, your house is falling apart-- 186 00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:20,978 Yeah, I'll go. 187 00:09:37,869 --> 00:09:40,247 Uh, Henry? 188 00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:43,959 Are you all right? 189 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:45,711 Henry? 190 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,637 Ah. 191 00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:58,557 I'm making us a Vichyssoise for lunch. 192 00:09:58,557 --> 00:10:01,101 I need a toothbrush, Laurel. 193 00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,352 Give me 15 minutes. 194 00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:03,770 I'll drive you into town. 195 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:05,147 I want to drive myself. 196 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:08,608 Oh, don't start that again, Henry. 197 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:10,694 You lived in Manhattan far too long 198 00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:12,362 to remember how to drive. 199 00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:13,530 We drove upstate last winter. 200 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,782 I love to drive. 201 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:18,327 We'll go together. 202 00:10:18,327 --> 00:10:19,745 We'll make it an outing. 203 00:10:19,745 --> 00:10:22,831 I don't want a goddamn outing. 204 00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,959 I want to drive myself into town 205 00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,294 and get it, 206 00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:28,628 alone. 207 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,257 Well, I won't let you. 208 00:10:32,883 --> 00:10:35,010 I'm sorry, Henry, it's far too risky. 209 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:56,865 Hey. 210 00:10:56,865 --> 00:10:58,700 Hey, I was thinking about you. 211 00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,410 I'm where we had our second date. 212 00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,371 Do you remember that little cafe on West 4th? 213 00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:04,414 And my realtor, 214 00:11:04,414 --> 00:11:07,334 I swear, he looks just like the guy from The Bachelor. 215 00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:09,795 You had a crush on him, right? 216 00:11:09,795 --> 00:11:11,088 No. 217 00:11:11,088 --> 00:11:13,423 I just thought he was too good for that girl. 218 00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:17,135 Well, look, Russell's been gone overnight. 219 00:11:17,135 --> 00:11:19,638 He's probably in some motel somewhere, 220 00:11:19,638 --> 00:11:22,182 blowing all his money on whores and drugs 221 00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:23,725 and whatever's in the mini fridge. 222 00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:24,976 Oh, she told you? 223 00:11:24,976 --> 00:11:26,103 Yeah, we spoke. 224 00:11:26,103 --> 00:11:27,187 Julie and I, 225 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,647 not Russell. 226 00:11:28,647 --> 00:11:30,357 So what should I do? 227 00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:32,359 It's their marriage. 228 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:34,820 Just keep your brain out of their headspace. 229 00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:36,571 It's full of booby-traps. 230 00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:39,658 Julie just needs to take this time 231 00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:41,785 and figure it out on her own. 232 00:11:41,785 --> 00:11:43,954 - Sorry. - You've got to be kidding me. 233 00:11:43,954 --> 00:11:45,872 Do you have a different take? 234 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,582 No, I'm passing my dad. 235 00:11:47,582 --> 00:11:49,126 He's walking. I heard what you said. 236 00:11:49,126 --> 00:11:51,086 I'll stay out of it. That's my forte. 237 00:11:51,086 --> 00:11:53,171 Oh, Christ, if I pick him up... 238 00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:55,590 I've got to go to work and the hardware store. 239 00:11:57,342 --> 00:11:59,636 Hello? 240 00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:00,762 He hung up on me. 241 00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:02,097 Ah. 242 00:12:02,097 --> 00:12:03,473 Lily-Lil! 243 00:12:03,473 --> 00:12:05,559 Today's the day we find you a new home. 244 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:06,977 The vibes are strong today. 245 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,565 Hey, partner! 246 00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:13,108 Rodeo is back that way. 247 00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:14,651 You need a ride? 248 00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,111 Uh, no thanks. 249 00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:17,904 Dad! Dad, it's me! 250 00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:18,989 Come on. 251 00:12:18,989 --> 00:12:20,323 Come on, get in. 252 00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:25,954 He's losing his marbles. 253 00:12:25,954 --> 00:12:27,873 Well, I always hated his marbles, 254 00:12:27,873 --> 00:12:29,833 so maybe there's something better 255 00:12:29,833 --> 00:12:31,751 rattling around in there now. 256 00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:33,170 A couple of nickels? 257 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:35,922 Maybe a rare one I could sell? 258 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,424 You can't take me home. 259 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:39,634 Well, I gotta go to work, so... 260 00:12:39,634 --> 00:12:40,760 I'll go with you. 261 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:41,845 No, I... 262 00:12:43,805 --> 00:12:45,390 Does Laurel know where you are? 263 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:47,559 I gotta get my own car. 264 00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:49,519 She keeps me trapped at home 265 00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:51,438 like I'm in a Stephen King novel. 266 00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:52,522 Could be worse. 267 00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:54,608 It could be a Jane Austen novel. 268 00:12:54,608 --> 00:12:55,692 Yuck. 269 00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:56,985 All right, buckle up. 270 00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:58,487 Dammit, Leslie! 271 00:12:58,487 --> 00:13:00,489 That is a bald-faced lie! 272 00:13:00,489 --> 00:13:02,407 I'm just the messenger. 273 00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:03,909 We would... 274 00:13:03,909 --> 00:13:05,827 We would support a strike. 275 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:07,078 You know we would. 276 00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:08,788 It's the damn French department 277 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:11,875 and their stupid French berets! 278 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:16,963 We are and have, 279 00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,298 until recently, always... 280 00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:19,633 Right through here. 281 00:13:21,218 --> 00:13:22,552 What's going on over there? 282 00:13:22,552 --> 00:13:24,221 Rourke's on with the union rep. 283 00:13:24,221 --> 00:13:26,556 Something about the legislature vote coming up. 284 00:13:26,556 --> 00:13:27,849 What did she say? 285 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:29,684 It's nothing. It's budget cuts. 286 00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:30,810 Cuts? What are they cutting? 287 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,229 Uh, right through here. 288 00:13:32,229 --> 00:13:33,605 That wasn't an issue at Columbia. 289 00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:36,441 Yeah, the Columbia endowment was $21 billion. 290 00:13:36,441 --> 00:13:39,402 If I needed something, we'd just call the president's girl, 291 00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:40,487 and that was it. 292 00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:41,863 You'd call his daughter? 293 00:13:41,863 --> 00:13:43,782 Uh, look, this is my father, Henry. 294 00:13:43,782 --> 00:13:45,617 This is my assistant, Rachel. 295 00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,077 She'll take care of you. 296 00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:49,287 Listen, if he gets feisty, 297 00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:50,455 just, uh, 298 00:13:50,455 --> 00:13:53,667 just give him some of these student papers to read. 299 00:13:54,209 --> 00:13:55,293 She looks gifted. 300 00:13:55,794 --> 00:13:57,003 And so it begins. 301 00:13:57,003 --> 00:13:59,798 Young lady, I'd like your help with a couple of things. 302 00:13:59,798 --> 00:14:00,924 Cool it. 303 00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:03,593 It's okay. What do you need, Mr. Devereaux? 304 00:14:03,593 --> 00:14:06,763 First, I'd like a coffee, light, with two sugars. 305 00:14:07,055 --> 00:14:08,932 Second, I'd like to know 306 00:14:08,932 --> 00:14:10,684 what's on your bedside table. 307 00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,310 You don't have to answer. 308 00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:13,812 Excuse me? 309 00:14:14,563 --> 00:14:16,147 What are you reading now? 310 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:18,567 - Oh. - Okay, he can read them, 311 00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:20,277 but don't let him grade anything. 312 00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:26,366 Our faithful union rep 313 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,118 won't call for a strike. 314 00:14:28,118 --> 00:14:29,369 Why not? 315 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,788 - She's prudent. - She's a pussy. 316 00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:33,999 Well, she thinks it will fail 317 00:14:33,999 --> 00:14:38,503 because department chairs like Hank here 318 00:14:38,503 --> 00:14:40,255 abandoned the union weeks ago. 319 00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:45,176 Remember how our last strike went? 320 00:14:45,176 --> 00:14:47,554 We lost more ground than we gained. 321 00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:50,056 So then this time, we do it better. 322 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:54,311 That's all you ever do, is nothing! 323 00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:57,272 Your solution to everything, right? 324 00:14:57,897 --> 00:14:59,065 Don't even try? 325 00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:03,111 You've screwed us all. 326 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:07,532 Them's the facts. 327 00:15:17,208 --> 00:15:19,836 My car lease is up tomorrow. 328 00:15:19,836 --> 00:15:21,129 Ah, you know what? 329 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:23,673 I'm just going to assume the worst and get a Kia. 330 00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:25,550 Where have we landed? 331 00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:27,677 Dickie Pope's a master tactician. 332 00:15:28,386 --> 00:15:31,014 Our plan can't be to outsmart him. 333 00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:32,557 Why don't you keep sucking his balls, 334 00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:33,892 and seeing where that gets us? 335 00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:36,811 Look, I'm just pointing out 336 00:15:36,811 --> 00:15:39,898 that he's executing his plan brilliantly. 337 00:15:39,898 --> 00:15:42,692 You know, he hasn't missed a step. 338 00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:45,028 So, realistically, we're going to lose this. 339 00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:46,237 Aren't we? 340 00:15:47,072 --> 00:15:48,365 Hank? 341 00:15:49,741 --> 00:15:52,285 So, can you at least tell us what you're thinking? 342 00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:54,663 You're not going to like it. 343 00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:56,956 We're grownups. 344 00:16:02,879 --> 00:16:06,341 I've really got to replace the hose on my kitchen sink. 345 00:16:07,676 --> 00:16:09,302 Jesus. 346 00:16:12,055 --> 00:16:14,015 Hey, Julie, I'm on my way to class. 347 00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:15,266 I just have a minute. What's up? 348 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,768 I just went to Russell's pottery class, 349 00:16:16,768 --> 00:16:18,645 which he never misses, and he wasn't there, 350 00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:20,855 and his teacher said it was weird for him to miss 351 00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:22,315 'cause he was about to do under-glazing, 352 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:23,858 and he hasn't returned my texts, 353 00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:25,318 and no one has heard from him, 354 00:16:25,318 --> 00:16:26,861 and I think something's wrong with him. 355 00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,113 This isn't like him. 356 00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:30,073 Right. 357 00:16:30,073 --> 00:16:33,326 Something's definitely happened to him. Do I call the police? 358 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,370 The FBI doesn't get involved unless it's been three days, 359 00:16:35,370 --> 00:16:36,871 I know that from Euphoria. 360 00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:38,289 Look, 361 00:16:38,289 --> 00:16:41,292 what is the most logical explanation here, okay? 362 00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:43,837 You told Mom you thought he was having an affair? 363 00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:46,881 Yeah, but that was wrong. Even Mom said so. 364 00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:50,009 That was about us not connecting because I never see him. 365 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,428 Well, why is that? 366 00:16:51,428 --> 00:16:53,430 Because of that stupid job you made him take. 367 00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:55,223 Can you just tell me what to do? 368 00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,270 All right, I'm talking about the simplest reason, okay? 369 00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:01,855 Have you ever heard of Occam's Razor? 370 00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,148 Okay? 371 00:17:03,148 --> 00:17:05,525 It means the most obvious explanation 372 00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:07,026 is very often the truth. 373 00:17:08,111 --> 00:17:09,446 That sounds dumb. 374 00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:12,115 It just means that Russell isn't calling you back, 375 00:17:12,115 --> 00:17:14,743 and he's not coming home because he doesn't want to. 376 00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:18,288 Now I know why Mom's leaving you. 377 00:17:18,872 --> 00:17:20,331 I... 378 00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:25,587 "...and he sat back in the doctor's armchair, 379 00:17:25,587 --> 00:17:27,881 and the room got smaller, 380 00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:30,383 and the air got colder, 381 00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:32,218 and the chair got less comfortable, 382 00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:34,804 - and the carpet--" - Okay, Lester, that's... 383 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,850 That's interesting, interesting take on 384 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:41,936 the subject of having an hour left to live, 385 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:45,064 but I think we left Jen's story a little early. 386 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:48,443 Jen, you said your protagonist was 24? 387 00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:51,362 - Twenty-two, actually. - Okay, whatever. 388 00:17:52,530 --> 00:17:53,907 She needs help, 389 00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:55,742 but she never asks her father for help. 390 00:17:55,742 --> 00:17:56,868 Why is that? 391 00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:02,165 Well, her father's not in the story. 392 00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:05,084 The story's about how she lost her neighbor's dog. 393 00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:08,630 Yes, yes, but as a curious reader, 394 00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,757 I'm just wondering if the father gave her, 395 00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:14,511 you know, probably true advice on how to find a dog, 396 00:18:14,511 --> 00:18:16,054 or manage one, 397 00:18:16,054 --> 00:18:18,306 what... what would that look like? 398 00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:20,683 Why would she call her dad, though? 399 00:18:20,683 --> 00:18:23,311 I don't think the reader will be thinking about that. 400 00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:25,021 The perceptive reader would. 401 00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,105 No. 402 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,524 No call, 'cause... 403 00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:29,442 Here's what's going to happen. 404 00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:31,027 She'll give her dad a call, 405 00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:33,780 and he's going to give some messed-up fatherly advice, 406 00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:35,365 and probably get too involved 407 00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:37,325 and take away her agency. 408 00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:39,577 No way she's calling her dad. 409 00:18:39,577 --> 00:18:41,538 You called your father. 410 00:18:42,163 --> 00:18:43,331 What? 411 00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:47,001 Are we talking about my story? 412 00:18:47,001 --> 00:18:48,586 So, what about my story? 413 00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:50,755 No, we're still talking about Jen's story, 414 00:18:50,755 --> 00:18:52,382 just Jen's story, 415 00:18:52,382 --> 00:18:53,550 but let's... 416 00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:56,594 Take away her agency, let me push back on that. 417 00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:00,640 She's an adult, so how does he do that? 418 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:01,808 He can't. 419 00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:05,228 Also, if he doesn't help her, isn't he abandoning her? 420 00:19:05,228 --> 00:19:07,522 No, it still takes away from her story. 421 00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:09,816 Well, it shows that he cares. 422 00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:12,986 He could just care in his head 'cause I didn't write him into the story. 423 00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:15,321 If I may, Professor, 424 00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:17,365 I think what you're trying to say is that... 425 00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,617 Well, and this is also true in my experience, 426 00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:22,537 every character carries three characters with them, 427 00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:24,455 a father, a mother, 428 00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:25,582 a younger sister. 429 00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:27,333 Yeah! That's right. 430 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:30,753 But is this kind of character work on people who aren't in the story important? 431 00:19:30,753 --> 00:19:31,963 It's vital. 432 00:19:31,963 --> 00:19:33,047 Yeah, uh... 433 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,760 Yes, I mean, the father is in her life. 434 00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,178 He should be in her story. 435 00:19:40,013 --> 00:19:42,056 Yeah, he should help her find the dog. 436 00:19:42,765 --> 00:19:43,850 Okay. 437 00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:46,811 Then, um, 438 00:19:46,811 --> 00:19:48,813 her father died when she was three. 439 00:19:48,813 --> 00:19:50,189 - Aw, that's... - Okay, yeah, 440 00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,274 no, that's just lazy. 441 00:19:51,274 --> 00:19:52,442 Yeah. 442 00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:55,570 What? 443 00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:56,779 Have you seen Russell? 444 00:19:56,779 --> 00:19:58,656 - Nope. - Has he been at work? 445 00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,116 Nope. 446 00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:02,785 Okay, well, if you see him, have him call me, okay? 447 00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:04,120 Julie is worried about him. 448 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,455 Yup. 449 00:20:06,247 --> 00:20:08,291 Is everything okay? 450 00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:12,962 You can't hide forever. 451 00:20:12,962 --> 00:20:14,964 I know. 452 00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:20,386 To wit, I have never been more stuck in the muck 453 00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:23,473 than on that blistery New York evening, 454 00:20:23,973 --> 00:20:25,516 and, of course, 455 00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:28,978 my mind went directly to Dickens 456 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:32,148 and his irrational fear of hansom cabs. 457 00:20:32,148 --> 00:20:33,274 Ah. 458 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,152 Um, where was I? 459 00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:37,862 Uh, fear of cabs. 460 00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:41,950 Yes. We know Dickens suffered trauma 461 00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:44,327 from a train derailment he was in. 462 00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:48,331 He wrote a letter in 1865 463 00:20:48,331 --> 00:20:51,751 to an opera singer he met in Paris, 464 00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:54,629 Madame Pauline Viardot. 465 00:20:55,213 --> 00:20:56,923 Fascinating... 466 00:20:56,923 --> 00:20:58,174 You let him out? 467 00:20:58,174 --> 00:21:00,385 - I couldn't just lock-- - What did you do to him? 468 00:21:00,385 --> 00:21:03,471 He hates Dickens. He's written three books on how much he hates Dickens. 469 00:21:03,471 --> 00:21:05,098 Well, I didn't know. 470 00:21:05,515 --> 00:21:07,016 What is it about fame 471 00:21:07,016 --> 00:21:09,560 that turns people into sycophantic morons? 472 00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:12,021 I mean, he can barely tie his own shoelaces, 473 00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:14,565 and he's spitting out nonsense from muscle memory here, 474 00:21:14,565 --> 00:21:16,526 and they're riveted, 475 00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:18,194 like he's Taylor Swift, 476 00:21:18,194 --> 00:21:20,947 and they're, you know, the world. 477 00:21:20,947 --> 00:21:22,949 Scintillating anecdote. 478 00:21:22,949 --> 00:21:26,035 I wonder if you might perhaps drop by my class 479 00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:28,913 Oh, no, no. No. We've got to leave. 480 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:30,915 - What? He didn't finish his story. - Yeah. 481 00:21:30,915 --> 00:21:32,458 Yes, he did. 482 00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:34,544 A few more minutes. 483 00:21:34,544 --> 00:21:36,587 Okay. I'll see you in 10 years. 484 00:21:37,755 --> 00:21:39,549 Hey... 485 00:21:39,549 --> 00:21:41,467 Your daughter hung up on me. 486 00:21:41,467 --> 00:21:42,635 Good for her. 487 00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:45,888 If you're not careful, she's going to turn out like you. 488 00:21:45,888 --> 00:21:47,390 Maybe she's still mad at you. 489 00:21:47,390 --> 00:21:48,975 Mad at me? Why? 490 00:21:48,975 --> 00:21:51,519 Why? Because you fired her. 491 00:21:51,519 --> 00:21:52,603 You lied to her. 492 00:21:52,603 --> 00:21:55,398 You told her that you didn't have any more classes to offer her. 493 00:21:55,398 --> 00:21:57,316 But she doesn't know I lied. 494 00:21:58,026 --> 00:21:59,360 You told her? 495 00:22:00,695 --> 00:22:03,281 Well, she was going to take a gig in Tennessee. 496 00:22:03,573 --> 00:22:05,450 You know? So, what am I going to do, 497 00:22:05,450 --> 00:22:06,909 see her once a year? 498 00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:08,453 She's the only daughter I like. 499 00:22:08,453 --> 00:22:10,455 What will Thanksgivings be like without Margaret? 500 00:22:10,455 --> 00:22:12,040 Sitting in some damn diner 501 00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:13,916 listening to my stupid son-in-law 502 00:22:13,916 --> 00:22:15,960 talk about monster truck shows? 503 00:22:17,211 --> 00:22:19,547 You handled this perfectly. Nice job. 504 00:22:19,547 --> 00:22:21,049 Okay, the lecture's over. 505 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:22,884 Seriously. Come on. 506 00:22:22,884 --> 00:22:24,302 You've got to get your coat. 507 00:22:28,639 --> 00:22:31,017 If anyone calls, I've gone fishing. 508 00:22:31,142 --> 00:22:32,518 Okay. 509 00:22:32,518 --> 00:22:34,270 - I got it. - English department. 510 00:22:35,563 --> 00:22:38,274 Uh, okay. 511 00:22:38,274 --> 00:22:39,776 Hey, Gracie? 512 00:22:43,738 --> 00:22:45,281 Dean Rose would like to see you. 513 00:22:47,075 --> 00:22:48,868 He wants to see me? 514 00:22:48,868 --> 00:22:51,245 Can't I just... Can I call him? 515 00:22:51,954 --> 00:22:54,499 He said it's a sensitive matter? 516 00:22:57,418 --> 00:22:59,212 Is... Is someone from Human Resources 517 00:22:59,212 --> 00:23:00,379 going to be there? 518 00:23:00,963 --> 00:23:03,091 He didn't say? 519 00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:05,760 Well, this can't be. 520 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:07,929 I mean, you... You don't think... 521 00:23:07,929 --> 00:23:10,014 You don't think that this is... 522 00:23:10,264 --> 00:23:12,266 I was just published! 523 00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:32,578 - I'm sorry. - It's all right. I sent for her. 524 00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:35,456 - Gracie, sit-- - I will not sit, and I will not go, 525 00:23:35,456 --> 00:23:37,125 gently or otherwise... 526 00:23:37,125 --> 00:23:38,209 - Gracie-- - ...and if I do, 527 00:23:38,209 --> 00:23:40,211 you can count on it being otherwise. 528 00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:41,420 - Gracie-- - My class enrollments 529 00:23:41,546 --> 00:23:43,965 are the highest in the department. My courses have waitlists. 530 00:23:43,965 --> 00:23:46,050 Sometimes, students wait two or three hours 531 00:23:46,050 --> 00:23:47,760 - to see if they're granted access! - Gracie. 532 00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:50,012 How can you put me on the chopping block? 533 00:23:50,304 --> 00:23:51,681 Oh, this isn't about that. 534 00:23:51,681 --> 00:23:53,724 This... 535 00:23:53,850 --> 00:23:55,852 I did it. 536 00:23:55,977 --> 00:23:57,228 I'm getting a divorce. 537 00:23:58,312 --> 00:23:59,689 It's finally happening. 538 00:23:59,689 --> 00:24:01,232 - You moved out? - Well... 539 00:24:01,232 --> 00:24:03,442 - Oh, my God. - No, this is real. 540 00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:05,987 I said the words. She took it well. 541 00:24:05,987 --> 00:24:07,196 Too well, to be honest, 542 00:24:07,196 --> 00:24:10,116 and she actually thanked me because I brought it up first, 543 00:24:10,116 --> 00:24:12,493 and then she went out with friends. 544 00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:14,620 You're too late. 545 00:24:14,620 --> 00:24:15,788 Maybe, 546 00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:18,708 maybe if you had come to me six months ago, but... 547 00:24:19,500 --> 00:24:21,752 I am on the rise. 548 00:24:22,795 --> 00:24:23,880 You had your chance. 549 00:24:26,716 --> 00:24:30,094 "We dipped our palms in chalk 550 00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:33,806 to keep our hands from letting go 551 00:24:33,806 --> 00:24:35,641 and..." 552 00:24:39,478 --> 00:24:41,856 Interesting interpretation. 553 00:24:44,859 --> 00:24:46,611 It's 380 square feet, 554 00:24:46,986 --> 00:24:49,197 - massive walk-in closet. - Mmm-hmm. 555 00:24:49,197 --> 00:24:50,615 Hardwood floors, 556 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:55,077 - and a cute little alcove. - Oh, yeah. 557 00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:56,495 That's nice. 558 00:24:56,495 --> 00:24:59,248 And you're only two blocks away from the A and C subway lines, 559 00:24:59,248 --> 00:25:01,792 which takes you right into Penn Station. 560 00:25:01,792 --> 00:25:04,003 - That's where your school is, yeah? - Yeah. 561 00:25:05,129 --> 00:25:07,381 And this one's $2,900? 562 00:25:07,381 --> 00:25:08,841 $2,885. 563 00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:10,176 Oh. 564 00:25:13,638 --> 00:25:14,680 Hmm? 565 00:25:15,973 --> 00:25:18,059 I don't know. 566 00:25:18,059 --> 00:25:20,144 It's very cute. 567 00:25:20,144 --> 00:25:22,772 It's a little small. 568 00:25:22,772 --> 00:25:26,150 I'm just thinking if my husband comes to visit, or my daughter, 569 00:25:26,150 --> 00:25:29,028 or what if both of them come at the same time? 570 00:25:30,363 --> 00:25:32,323 Okay, I'm noticing a pattern here. 571 00:25:32,323 --> 00:25:34,075 Do you see the pattern? 572 00:25:34,075 --> 00:25:35,785 Look, I show you a small place, 573 00:25:35,785 --> 00:25:37,620 you talk about visitors. 574 00:25:37,620 --> 00:25:40,998 - I show you a big place-- - Oh, yeah, I see. 575 00:25:40,998 --> 00:25:42,083 Okay, 576 00:25:42,083 --> 00:25:44,001 here's what we're gonna do. 577 00:25:44,418 --> 00:25:46,629 I only do this for my favorite clients. 578 00:25:46,629 --> 00:25:48,673 - Close your eyes. - Okay. 579 00:25:49,507 --> 00:25:54,095 Now imagine your perfect day. 580 00:25:54,095 --> 00:25:55,179 Okay. 581 00:25:56,264 --> 00:25:58,849 I... I wake up early, 582 00:25:58,849 --> 00:26:00,184 and I go for a run, 583 00:26:00,184 --> 00:26:01,978 and then... 584 00:26:01,978 --> 00:26:03,396 I get a cappuccino nearby, 585 00:26:03,396 --> 00:26:05,398 maybe a really good croissant. 586 00:26:05,398 --> 00:26:07,233 Work. 587 00:26:07,858 --> 00:26:09,443 I go to a cafe after 588 00:26:09,443 --> 00:26:11,153 for, like, emails and whatever. 589 00:26:11,529 --> 00:26:12,697 Um... 590 00:26:12,697 --> 00:26:14,365 Meet up with a friend or two 591 00:26:14,365 --> 00:26:16,033 for drinks and dinner, 592 00:26:16,033 --> 00:26:17,451 some place new and fun, 593 00:26:18,202 --> 00:26:20,121 and then home, 594 00:26:20,121 --> 00:26:21,831 settle in, 595 00:26:21,831 --> 00:26:23,958 watch TV, 596 00:26:23,958 --> 00:26:25,584 or read in bed. 597 00:26:27,003 --> 00:26:29,005 And that's your perfect day? 598 00:26:29,005 --> 00:26:30,089 Yeah, more or less. 599 00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:32,383 Okay. 600 00:26:32,383 --> 00:26:34,385 Now, here's what I'm hearing. 601 00:26:34,927 --> 00:26:36,137 No husband, 602 00:26:36,137 --> 00:26:37,722 no kids, 603 00:26:37,722 --> 00:26:39,724 no visitors. 604 00:26:40,725 --> 00:26:42,059 Eh... 605 00:26:42,059 --> 00:26:43,811 Just sayin'. 606 00:26:45,438 --> 00:26:47,356 I think I picked the wrong perfect day. 607 00:26:47,356 --> 00:26:49,483 Come on, he was trying to rent you an apartment. 608 00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:53,779 I feel guilty. 609 00:26:53,779 --> 00:26:56,115 Why? You're here, so you're thinking about here. 610 00:26:56,115 --> 00:26:57,700 I have to go to the bathroom. 611 00:27:06,834 --> 00:27:07,960 Oh, shit. 612 00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:09,545 - My husband. - What? 613 00:27:13,716 --> 00:27:14,925 Shit. 614 00:27:17,011 --> 00:27:18,220 Hey! 615 00:27:18,220 --> 00:27:20,806 - What a surprise. - I know, right? 616 00:27:20,806 --> 00:27:23,225 How lucky. 617 00:27:24,352 --> 00:27:28,189 - I had a client nearby. - Ooh. 618 00:27:28,189 --> 00:27:29,565 Did you order yet? 619 00:27:29,565 --> 00:27:32,318 No, uh, just waiting for a menu. 620 00:27:32,318 --> 00:27:34,320 Fantastic. Okay, great. 621 00:27:34,945 --> 00:27:37,990 - It's so good you're here. - Everything okay... at work? 622 00:27:41,452 --> 00:27:44,663 - Not really. - It's a tough day for me, too. 623 00:27:44,663 --> 00:27:45,748 Yeah, looks like it. 624 00:27:48,834 --> 00:27:51,128 Well, I heard you say that it was a good place... 625 00:27:51,128 --> 00:27:52,880 So, uh, Steve and Fiona 626 00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,591 invited us up to the Berkshires this weekend. 627 00:27:55,591 --> 00:27:57,802 You know, their house in the Berkshires. 628 00:27:57,802 --> 00:27:59,720 Uh-huh. 629 00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:03,015 So I'll just say that we're, you know, too busy to go, or-- 630 00:28:03,182 --> 00:28:05,309 - I mean, how nice is their house? - It's a shithole. 631 00:28:11,315 --> 00:28:12,400 Here we are! 632 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:14,819 One Italian chopped salad, 633 00:28:14,819 --> 00:28:16,320 and one chicken penne. 634 00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:17,696 That's ours. 635 00:28:17,696 --> 00:28:20,282 - I don't think so-- - That's definitely ours. We ordered it. 636 00:28:20,282 --> 00:28:22,201 - Mmm-hmm. - Yup. 637 00:28:25,371 --> 00:28:27,123 Thanks. 638 00:28:30,084 --> 00:28:31,752 Looks tasty. 639 00:28:33,129 --> 00:28:35,381 Do you want to share, or-- 640 00:28:36,674 --> 00:28:37,967 Actually, I want a divorce. 641 00:28:40,719 --> 00:28:43,431 But, uh... But-but why? 642 00:28:44,932 --> 00:28:47,017 Well, I feel like you're not honest with me, 643 00:28:47,017 --> 00:28:48,352 or with anyone really. 644 00:28:48,352 --> 00:28:49,603 I feel you're... 645 00:28:49,603 --> 00:28:51,605 You're a dishonest person. 646 00:28:51,605 --> 00:28:53,023 Uh, but-but that's not-- 647 00:28:53,023 --> 00:28:55,693 - Why are you doing this? - And your erections are soft. 648 00:28:56,527 --> 00:28:58,070 - Not always. - And you're clingy. 649 00:28:58,070 --> 00:28:59,488 I can't even have lunch on my own 650 00:28:59,488 --> 00:29:01,073 without you having to be all over it. 651 00:29:01,824 --> 00:29:04,660 I thought you liked having lunch with me. 652 00:29:06,787 --> 00:29:08,122 No, you know what? 653 00:29:08,122 --> 00:29:09,290 It's me. 654 00:29:09,290 --> 00:29:11,375 Yep. I'm just not fulfilled. 655 00:29:14,128 --> 00:29:15,838 You want to tell me why? 656 00:29:16,172 --> 00:29:18,966 You really wanna know? 657 00:29:19,091 --> 00:29:23,846 I'm not in the same place as when we met. 658 00:29:23,846 --> 00:29:26,640 I've grown, or... 659 00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,518 Or at least I'm trying, 660 00:29:29,935 --> 00:29:31,395 and I feel like you haven't... 661 00:29:33,063 --> 00:29:35,065 Or maybe you're just starting, 662 00:29:35,649 --> 00:29:38,444 but, like, it's a series of, like, 663 00:29:38,444 --> 00:29:39,695 false starts, 664 00:29:39,695 --> 00:29:42,656 and it never... t never really goes anywhere, 665 00:29:42,656 --> 00:29:45,493 and... 666 00:29:45,493 --> 00:29:47,912 And I can't just keep 667 00:29:47,912 --> 00:29:50,289 waiting, 668 00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:51,540 hoping, 669 00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:53,459 for no other reason than to hope 670 00:29:53,459 --> 00:29:55,085 that we're going to... 671 00:29:55,085 --> 00:29:58,005 That we're going to be in sync again, so... 672 00:29:58,506 --> 00:30:01,091 I have made some big decisions, 673 00:30:01,091 --> 00:30:02,760 and I'm starting to see 674 00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:05,721 that those decisions don't involve you anymore, 675 00:30:06,055 --> 00:30:08,307 and I'm really sorry, 676 00:30:08,432 --> 00:30:10,768 but they just don't. 677 00:30:12,269 --> 00:30:13,729 So, um, 678 00:30:15,022 --> 00:30:17,942 am I going to go, or are you? 679 00:30:20,277 --> 00:30:21,946 - Um... - Oh, Jesus. 680 00:30:38,963 --> 00:30:41,131 - There. - Where are we? 681 00:30:41,131 --> 00:30:43,384 Just sit here, okay? 682 00:30:44,009 --> 00:30:46,470 Don't touch anything. Don't talk to anyone, 683 00:30:46,470 --> 00:30:49,181 and if you have to pee, don't. 684 00:30:49,181 --> 00:30:50,307 I'll be right back. 685 00:31:11,537 --> 00:31:12,746 I called the bar. 686 00:31:12,746 --> 00:31:14,832 They told me your shift ended an hour ago. 687 00:31:15,332 --> 00:31:19,211 I know Billie told you what I told her, 688 00:31:19,211 --> 00:31:22,047 I mean, about the classes. 689 00:31:22,047 --> 00:31:23,424 I'm sorry that I did that. 690 00:31:23,424 --> 00:31:24,633 I shouldn't have. 691 00:31:26,719 --> 00:31:28,804 I really don't want to talk about this right now. 692 00:31:28,804 --> 00:31:30,347 Yeah. 693 00:31:30,347 --> 00:31:32,808 Hey, do you think we can get past this? 694 00:31:32,808 --> 00:31:35,311 Because I want you to know why I did it. 695 00:31:35,311 --> 00:31:38,272 - 'Cause I think you're better-- - It's just a bad time, okay? 696 00:31:38,272 --> 00:31:40,065 Yeah. Yeah, all right. 697 00:31:52,202 --> 00:31:53,704 Russell? 698 00:31:55,247 --> 00:31:57,458 Yeah? 699 00:32:09,053 --> 00:32:10,763 Oh... 700 00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:13,724 Julie is worried about you. 701 00:32:13,724 --> 00:32:15,851 - Dad, um-- - Just put your pants on. 702 00:32:16,810 --> 00:32:18,854 I'm going to take you home to your wife. 703 00:32:28,030 --> 00:32:30,366 - So, Gramps-- - No. 704 00:32:34,912 --> 00:32:36,955 - CarMax! - What? 705 00:32:36,955 --> 00:32:38,332 CarMax! 706 00:32:38,332 --> 00:32:41,251 - That's obviously not a CarMax-- - It's a car-looking place. 707 00:32:41,251 --> 00:32:43,420 - You know what I'm talking about. - No. Leave it. 708 00:32:43,420 --> 00:32:44,963 - I'm not going in. - Pull over! 709 00:32:44,963 --> 00:32:46,173 No, I don't want-- 710 00:32:46,173 --> 00:32:47,716 - Pull over! - All right, calm down! 711 00:32:47,716 --> 00:32:49,677 I'm pulling in! 712 00:32:49,677 --> 00:32:50,928 No laughing! 713 00:32:50,928 --> 00:32:52,596 I'm not ready for you to laugh! 714 00:32:52,596 --> 00:32:54,014 What did he do? What'd you do? 715 00:32:54,014 --> 00:32:55,516 He cheated on his wife. 716 00:32:55,516 --> 00:32:57,226 Bah! She'll be fine. 717 00:32:57,226 --> 00:33:00,229 All right, you can look at the cars. 718 00:33:00,229 --> 00:33:02,898 You have as much time as it takes me 719 00:33:02,898 --> 00:33:04,149 to try to pee. 720 00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:19,081 What? 721 00:33:19,081 --> 00:33:21,250 You'll never believe who I've got in my car. 722 00:33:21,250 --> 00:33:22,668 Is he with you? Is he okay? 723 00:33:22,876 --> 00:33:24,169 Yeah. 724 00:33:24,169 --> 00:33:26,630 He's okay in the way that you mean it. 725 00:33:27,589 --> 00:33:28,674 Where was he? 726 00:33:28,841 --> 00:33:30,175 Well, I'll let him tell you. 727 00:33:30,175 --> 00:33:31,885 I'll have him home in 20 minutes. 728 00:33:32,010 --> 00:33:33,011 Okay. 729 00:33:33,554 --> 00:33:34,722 Thank you. Bye. 730 00:33:39,184 --> 00:33:41,270 You know, you don't know the whole story. 731 00:33:41,395 --> 00:33:44,314 I only know the dirty parts. 732 00:33:44,690 --> 00:33:47,192 It's just it's hard with Julie sometimes. 733 00:33:47,192 --> 00:33:50,779 You don't know how she gets. I get excited about this great idea, 734 00:33:50,779 --> 00:33:54,533 and all she does is tell me all the reasons why it's stupid. 735 00:33:55,325 --> 00:33:57,327 Like, they thought Google was a stupid idea 736 00:33:57,327 --> 00:33:59,163 until it made a million dollars. 737 00:34:01,498 --> 00:34:03,000 I just feel like sometimes... 738 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:04,960 Sometimes, I need somebody in my corner 739 00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,004 who doesn't make me feel like a complete loser. 740 00:34:07,171 --> 00:34:09,840 Well, maybe you need to find a different corner. 741 00:34:11,467 --> 00:34:12,968 What's this? 742 00:34:13,218 --> 00:34:16,013 - You're Henry's son, right? - Yeah. 743 00:34:16,013 --> 00:34:17,222 Yeah, well, he's chosen a car, 744 00:34:17,222 --> 00:34:19,391 but, um, he's going to need a co-signer. 745 00:34:19,391 --> 00:34:21,852 Uh, no. He... He can't drive. 746 00:34:21,852 --> 00:34:23,896 and also, the last thing he needs 747 00:34:23,896 --> 00:34:25,731 is my financial backing. 748 00:34:25,731 --> 00:34:27,357 Yeah, well, he needs someone's. 749 00:34:27,357 --> 00:34:29,276 No credit, unpaid credit-card bills, 750 00:34:29,276 --> 00:34:31,069 terrible credit rating, no savings. 751 00:34:33,238 --> 00:34:34,823 This can't be right. 752 00:34:35,574 --> 00:34:37,367 What? 753 00:34:43,957 --> 00:34:45,959 And she thinks you're a loser. 754 00:34:50,047 --> 00:34:52,424 - Get in. - Okay. 755 00:34:52,424 --> 00:34:54,092 You're not buying a car today. 756 00:34:54,092 --> 00:34:55,427 Okay, okay. 757 00:34:58,847 --> 00:35:00,557 Hank, dear. Where are you? 758 00:35:00,557 --> 00:35:01,892 Where is Henry? 759 00:35:01,892 --> 00:35:04,228 All right, I'm about to leave a car dealership 760 00:35:04,228 --> 00:35:05,479 with my esteemed father. 761 00:35:05,479 --> 00:35:08,315 Did you know that he is completely broke? 762 00:35:08,315 --> 00:35:09,566 Of course I knew. 763 00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:11,151 Of course you knew. 764 00:35:11,151 --> 00:35:13,070 All right, I'm putting you on speaker phone 765 00:35:13,070 --> 00:35:15,489 so you and Dad can get your stories straight. 766 00:35:15,489 --> 00:35:18,367 - Go. Give me this. - Your father is a very important man, 767 00:35:18,367 --> 00:35:20,619 the kind of man who gets taken advantage of. 768 00:35:20,619 --> 00:35:22,120 It was Belinda. 769 00:35:22,663 --> 00:35:25,916 It was Melanie. A Joyce scholar. Zero originality. 770 00:35:26,250 --> 00:35:27,292 Let me guess. 771 00:35:27,835 --> 00:35:28,961 You cheated on her, 772 00:35:28,961 --> 00:35:30,546 more than once, 773 00:35:30,546 --> 00:35:33,549 so she got her revenge by stealing all your money? 774 00:35:33,799 --> 00:35:36,635 My money wasn't the only thing she stole. 775 00:35:36,635 --> 00:35:39,680 She plagiarized my theory about Dubliners! 776 00:35:40,097 --> 00:35:41,723 The bitch. 777 00:35:41,723 --> 00:35:44,059 You're being very unfair, Hank. 778 00:35:44,059 --> 00:35:45,477 Your father's in a crisis. 779 00:35:45,477 --> 00:35:46,645 We're his family. 780 00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:48,105 - It's our duty to-- - Alright. 781 00:35:48,105 --> 00:35:50,190 My duty is to go see my daughter, 782 00:35:50,190 --> 00:35:51,984 and I'm going to do that right now. 783 00:35:53,402 --> 00:35:54,945 Give me that. 784 00:36:09,167 --> 00:36:10,502 Hey, Dad. 785 00:36:10,502 --> 00:36:11,587 Is he in the car? 786 00:36:11,587 --> 00:36:13,589 Honey, can we sit down? 787 00:36:13,589 --> 00:36:14,715 No. Where is he? 788 00:36:16,967 --> 00:36:17,968 He ran away. 789 00:36:19,303 --> 00:36:21,263 Very funny. Can you tell me where he is? 790 00:36:21,597 --> 00:36:22,764 Julie, you were right. 791 00:36:23,724 --> 00:36:25,142 He was cheating on you. 792 00:36:30,898 --> 00:36:32,649 No. 793 00:36:32,858 --> 00:36:34,818 No, he can't, he's not a good enough liar. 794 00:36:37,070 --> 00:36:38,238 You have to understand 795 00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:39,948 that guys like Russell, hon', 796 00:36:39,948 --> 00:36:41,950 they're... They're small. 797 00:36:43,285 --> 00:36:44,411 He's my husband. 798 00:36:44,411 --> 00:36:46,496 I know it's hard to hear, 799 00:36:46,496 --> 00:36:48,540 but I want you to understand, you know, 800 00:36:48,540 --> 00:36:49,791 so you're not wondering. 801 00:36:51,752 --> 00:36:54,671 He doesn't feel respected. 802 00:36:54,671 --> 00:36:56,423 He doesn't feel smart around you-- 803 00:36:56,423 --> 00:36:57,925 Stop. Stop. 804 00:36:57,925 --> 00:36:59,343 You're just making shit up. 805 00:36:59,343 --> 00:37:01,053 - He wasn't cheating on me! - I'm not making... No! 806 00:37:02,304 --> 00:37:03,305 Thank you. 807 00:37:09,102 --> 00:37:10,646 You're an Amazon Prime member? 808 00:37:10,646 --> 00:37:12,773 - That-- - Dad... 809 00:37:12,773 --> 00:37:14,566 - Doesn't that co-- - He wasn't cheating on me! 810 00:37:14,566 --> 00:37:17,736 Look, he's terrified to face you, okay? 811 00:37:17,736 --> 00:37:18,862 He's a little boy. 812 00:37:18,862 --> 00:37:20,572 Can he even grow a beard? 813 00:37:20,572 --> 00:37:21,990 Why are you taking his side? 814 00:37:21,990 --> 00:37:23,492 I'm not taking his side. 815 00:37:23,492 --> 00:37:27,579 I'm just making excuses for him, his excuses. 816 00:37:27,579 --> 00:37:30,207 I didn't say... I'm saying them, but-- 817 00:37:33,669 --> 00:37:35,170 You left Grandpa in the car? 818 00:37:35,170 --> 00:37:36,463 He's fine. 819 00:37:36,463 --> 00:37:39,383 He can fiddle with the knobs. It's a wonderland for him. 820 00:37:44,638 --> 00:37:46,348 Where is the fiction section? 821 00:37:46,348 --> 00:37:48,058 Uh, this is not a bookstore. 822 00:37:48,558 --> 00:37:50,852 I saw some paperbacks over there. 823 00:37:50,852 --> 00:37:53,855 Okay, well, that's the fiction section. 824 00:37:53,855 --> 00:37:56,316 We had better libraries at Columbia. 825 00:37:56,316 --> 00:37:57,901 Right, right, 826 00:37:57,901 --> 00:38:01,196 but did Columbia have a plumbing aisle? 827 00:38:02,948 --> 00:38:05,200 Well, where's your assistant, the boy? 828 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:06,284 What boy? 829 00:38:06,284 --> 00:38:07,577 The one you were mad at. 830 00:38:07,953 --> 00:38:09,663 That's my daughter's husband, okay? 831 00:38:09,663 --> 00:38:11,206 And he was cheating on her. 832 00:38:11,581 --> 00:38:12,916 That's why you were mad? 833 00:38:12,916 --> 00:38:14,710 Yeah, that's why I was mad. 834 00:38:14,918 --> 00:38:16,920 You're being too hard on him. 835 00:38:17,045 --> 00:38:18,255 Dalliances happen. 836 00:38:18,255 --> 00:38:20,590 - It's part of marriage. - No, it isn't. 837 00:38:20,590 --> 00:38:22,217 It's hurtful and it's wrong. 838 00:38:22,217 --> 00:38:23,677 I've been there, buddy. 839 00:38:23,677 --> 00:38:25,303 Sometimes, it's right. 840 00:38:26,638 --> 00:38:28,056 There are tears, sure, 841 00:38:28,056 --> 00:38:29,850 but people come out stronger. 842 00:38:29,850 --> 00:38:31,435 No, they don't. 843 00:38:31,435 --> 00:38:32,936 From personal experience, 844 00:38:32,936 --> 00:38:35,272 I can tell you they do. 845 00:38:36,523 --> 00:38:38,400 You can lose yourself in a marriage 846 00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:39,693 if you're not careful. 847 00:38:40,485 --> 00:38:41,695 The key is to identify 848 00:38:41,695 --> 00:38:44,281 what will make you, the individual, prosper. 849 00:38:46,241 --> 00:38:48,243 Yeah? And what about your son, huh? 850 00:38:48,243 --> 00:38:51,288 Should you have been there for him? 851 00:38:51,747 --> 00:38:53,999 I was never going to be a father. 852 00:38:53,999 --> 00:38:55,083 That wasn't me. 853 00:38:56,460 --> 00:38:57,836 What was I gonna do? 854 00:38:58,253 --> 00:39:00,422 You can't be in between in life. 855 00:39:00,422 --> 00:39:03,508 You've got put yourself all in. 856 00:39:03,508 --> 00:39:06,470 Make that choice. 857 00:39:06,470 --> 00:39:08,096 So no regrets, huh? 858 00:39:10,599 --> 00:39:12,893 I have regrets, 859 00:39:13,143 --> 00:39:14,394 sure. 860 00:39:20,525 --> 00:39:21,860 Yeah? 861 00:39:26,198 --> 00:39:28,200 Recently, 862 00:39:29,076 --> 00:39:31,078 I've started rereading Dickens. 863 00:39:32,996 --> 00:39:36,374 Oh, much of the work is appalling, of course, maudlin. 864 00:39:36,374 --> 00:39:38,085 Still, 865 00:39:38,085 --> 00:39:39,669 I recognize 866 00:39:39,669 --> 00:39:42,339 I was too hard on him. 867 00:39:44,174 --> 00:39:47,719 I feel almost as if I have sinned against the man. 868 00:40:05,070 --> 00:40:07,614 Deprived of the possibility of confrontation, 869 00:40:07,614 --> 00:40:09,199 I turned to revenge. 870 00:40:10,450 --> 00:40:12,160 I realize that the Count of Monte Cristo 871 00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:14,454 was unfulfilled by his revenge, 872 00:40:14,454 --> 00:40:16,081 and ended up pitying his nemesis, 873 00:40:16,081 --> 00:40:18,416 and even helping him. 874 00:40:18,416 --> 00:40:20,627 I hate to call ol' Dante a softie, 875 00:40:20,627 --> 00:40:22,879 but I have to say, 876 00:40:22,879 --> 00:40:24,422 this feels just fine to me. 877 00:40:45,318 --> 00:40:46,611 I don't need any more of your help. 878 00:40:49,656 --> 00:40:51,324 I'm not here to help. 879 00:41:40,582 --> 00:41:44,044 ♪ I am a mountain ♪ 880 00:41:44,044 --> 00:41:47,797 ♪ High as can be ♪ 881 00:41:47,797 --> 00:41:51,551 ♪ Yes, and I am an ocean While you... ♪ 882 00:41:51,551 --> 00:41:55,555 ♪ While you stand by me ♪ 883 00:41:55,555 --> 00:41:59,476 ♪ Oh, but I am the fool you know ♪ 884 00:41:59,476 --> 00:42:03,271 ♪ Anytime you don't ♪ 885 00:42:03,563 --> 00:42:07,234 ♪ No telling where I'll go ♪ 886 00:42:07,234 --> 00:42:09,861 ♪ Or where I won't ♪ 887 00:42:09,861 --> 00:42:11,112 ♪ Where I won't ♪ 888 00:42:30,465 --> 00:42:32,968 ♪ Mmm, mmm, mmm... ♪ 889 00:42:34,427 --> 00:42:37,597 {\an8}♪ Mmm, mmm, mmm... ♪ 57315

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.