All language subtitles for The.Deep.End.2022.S01E03.PROPER.WEBRip.x265

TEAL: I cannot stress
how powerful this process is.

You will be making changes
based off of what you see.

Let's say that
you've got a parent

who really ruined your life.

That's something
that you need to see,

the dynamic with this
horribly abusive person.

A family display
is sometimes the hardest

because you have to see
the reality of

what was actually
happening in the home.

I need you to trust
that I've got you.

MAN: All right.

So what we're gonna do
to begin with

is we are going to bring

-your child self into the room.
-Okay.

Along with your parents
at that time.

Okay.

Do you agree
with your free will...

Do you agree
with your free will...

...to assume the consciousness
of the part of me...

...to assume the consciousness
of the part of me...

-...that is a child?
-...that is a child?

Yes.

Do you choose
with your free will to assume

the consciousness of the mother
of Ellie at this time?

I do.

To assume the consciousness
of Ellie's father

at this time
when she was a child?

[sighs] Yes.

WOMAN [as Young Ellie]:
Okay. It is up.

It's a castle.

WOMAN [as Ellie's father]:
I don't get her.

Who taught her to play
these weird-ass games?

Not me.

[clangs]

Are you relating to this?

-ELLIE: I'm not recognizing.
-MAN: Okay.

ELLIE: I'm not conscious of it.

WOMAN [as Ellie's father]:
No, I know--

WOMAN [as Ellie's mother]:
Just five minutes

without you pestering me.

WOMAN [as Ellie's father]:
No, no, no,

you're grounded today.

WOMAN [as Young Ellie]:
Class is over.

ELLIE: Did she just say he could
take his aggression out on me?

Wow.

I remember being mean
to my brother

but then I heard
Sylvia saying that

you suspected some abuse

from my brother towards me
as a kid?

WOMAN: When I was
in your father's role.

-Uh-huh.
-WOMAN: I felt that

maybe he had abused the son.

-Okay.
-WOMAN: And then

when I was in the mom role,

I felt like possibly like

some inappropriate...
touches happened

between the son
and the mom as well.

Oh, wow, okay.

[sighs]

[dramatic music playing]

MAN: That's what you've had
to hold on to until now.

What you're learning
is how to find it

and how to recognize it.

I don't want to see
my parents as evil.

Those are all things
that we can look at.

[crying]

[dramatic music playing]

[cell phone ringing]

JULIANA: Hi, mommy!

-JULIANA'S MOTHER: Hi, Juliana.
-Hello!

-[speaking foreign language]
-JULIANA: Yeah.

[speaking foreign language]

[sighs]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

-[speaking foreign language]
-JULIANA: Uh-hmm.

[speaking foreign language]

JULIANA'S MOTHER:
[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

Yeah.

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

JULIANA'S MOTHER:
[speaking foreign language]

-[laughs]
-JULIANA: Uh-hmm. [laughs]

-Yeah.
-JULIANA'S MOTHER: Okay.

JULIANA:
[speaking foreign language]

[piano music playing]

BLAKE: I got you something.

Do you remember
how you were saying

you're wanting to do something?

What's good, huh?

[sewing machine whirring]

Thank you. [laughs]

I really like being around him.

It feels like coming home.

It's not where I need
to fight for that feeling.

[indistinct chatter]

JULIANA:
I think that's the best,

finding that belonging.

[wind chimes tinkling]

MAN: Because I didn't
get that attention

because my parents
were also not...

BLAKE: [whispers] [indistinct]

[grunts]

[indistinct chatter]

I love you.

-Something's weird.
-[Juliana laughs]

My goodness.
Look at the smile on your face.

BLAKE: Hello.
It's good to see you.

MOLLY: Hello.

BLAKE: How are you?

MOLLY:
I have been viewing things

-from the periphery--
-Yeah.

MOLLY: --talking to the people

who are not part
of the inner core.

But in order to complete
my full analysis,

I have to understand
the core a little better.

-So you got married?
-I did.

MOLLY: Lucky man.

-Hi, Juliana.
-Hi.

MOLLY: Oh, my God.
She's gorgeous.

Hi.[laughs]

Nice to meet you.

MOLLY:
So you're very brave, Juliana,

to walk into this.

When did you come over?

JULIANA: End of July.

BLAKE: Three months
before we got married.

MOLLY: Okay. In the inner core,

does anyone else
have a relationship

outside of that group that is--

-Not--
-MOLLY: --this intimate?

Not really.

-MOLLY: Not really?
-No.

MOLLY: Is that discouraged?

BLAKE: No.

MOLLY: Any plans
of having youngins?

I don't know. I'm not really--

I feel like I've even done that
with Winter, so but--

MOLLY: I'm looking at her.

I know--I know. I see that.

[Molly laughs]

Yeah.

Well, I'm not really thinking
about that right now.

MOLLY: Right.
Okay, just checking.

JULIANA:
But it's definitely a wish.

MOLLY: Cool.

You guys should talk
about that sometime.

Yeah.

Yeah, the most terrible...

-WOMAN: Expecting the worst?
-MAN: I do.

I'm just--that's like
all I've been doing.

[dramatic music playing]

MAN : So this is--this is
Teal's birthday, huh?

WOMAN: He's here. Just smile.

TEAL: We're all into this
family and this community.

In childhood most of us
didn't fit in.

For my parents,
it was this kid is not like me,

this kid is not what I wanted.
This kid is too different.

I don't know what to do
with this kid.

This kid is mentally ill.

There's a problem
with this child.

MAN: Goodnight to
the old lady whispering...

TEAL:
They did not see me at all.

Not even
when I was being abused.

WOMAN: Beautiful summer day.

What have you got
for the horses, Teal?

TEAL: My parents
are in a whole other reality

about what happened
with my abuser.

You know, I'm telling them
such horrific details

that they can't--
they can't go there

and see themselves
as good parents anymore.

That's why I think of why
it's been so much easier

to forgive him than my parents.

And I watched this happen a lot.

Sometimes you have to
accept the fact

that my own family is my enemy.

A lot of people
have a hard time with that.

[dramatic music playing]

GRACI: So these are the only
pictures I have of me

from being a kid.

It's so interesting to say
you can look so normal.

But underneath there
was so much going on.

When I started
this whole thing with Teal,

I feel like my childhood
just started to come up.

[water pouring]

GRACI: I'm bringing you
into my safe place.

I don't really feel like
I can have walls in a bath,

so it gives the opportunity

to really get like
deep in there.

The first time
I actually got raped.

I was four.

I was telling my mom
I was hungry.

And she was
preparing for a party.

I don't know whose party,

but there was a cake

and I grabbed the cake.

And she got really mad at me
and she said,

"I'm gonna tell your father."

And so my dad came in,
grabbed me

and raping me was
his form of punishment.

My mom actually walked in
the first time.

I was screaming my head off.

She walked in and walked out.

Yeah.

I think the worst memory
I have is...

these family gathering parties

and, um, they actually built--

uh, it was like a barbecue pit.

They lit it on fire.

And then they put
the kids on top of it.

So they would put
every kid on top of it.

That's I think one
of the worst memories I have.

MAN: Why were they putting
the kids on top of it?

Just a form of punishment.

I don't know.

It--it's more so...

Here's the thing,

I did start uncovering

some of the stuff
when I was with Teal.

But I had stuff
I didn't need to uncover.

[water rippling]

TEAL:
Kambo is a shamanic medicine,

technically it's frog poison.

[scratching noise]

TEAL: What's your intention
for this medicine?

[sniffs]

For it to help me move forward.

It just feels like
the trauma is stuck. [sniffs]

My parents think I've gone nuts.

We live in two different worlds.

And so they don't think Teal

is a great influence for me.

There was a moment

where my mom came to Utah

and called the cops.

She said, "My daughter,
I haven't heard from her.

She's being abused."

Eventually, I actually
confronted my mom

on the abuse.

[whispers] See if you can
let it help you,

the medicine,

instead of fighting.

GRACI: And she denied
everything.

And so I was like
I can't--I can't do this.

That was the last time
I saw her.

It literally feels like
I'm paralyzed.

TEAL: [whispers] Let go.

Let go.

Let go.

[sniffs]

TEAL: Graci's family blames me

for why they aren't
around Graci.

Thinks I've ruined their family.

Blake's family
thinks the same thing.

And I'm probably gonna have

the same experience
with Juliana.

I cannot own the conditions,

painful conditions
that created a daughter

who doesn't
wanna be around them.

She left, why did she leave?

It can't have anything
to do with us, right?

So they, of course,
they're gonna--

they're gonna come up
with a story

that saves their self-esteem,

which is that she's been
seduced into a cult.

[dramatic music playing]

MOLLY: I have these
various checklists

that I'm using
to try to figure out

the whole accusation
of cult behavior.

Those two sets of ethics
in a cult,

one for the leadership,
and one for the followers.

JARED: I feel like
the inner circle

is very cultish.

I feel like the outer circle

-is very self-help.
-Right.

JARED: Because I wanted to be
healed so much,

I let myself be had by her.

I mean, this tattoo

is one that
she recommended I get,

because I was lying to her.

She said like I--
she could read my thoughts.

-And I was lying to her.
-MOLLY: Wow.

JARED: That's when I began to

question my childhood,
my family.

You know, I thought
my grandparents

sexually abused me
and my parents.

I thought I--
because you would go

and just create
all these stories

and then you like start to,
like, freak out.

Like if that really happened,

if this is my mind
showing me this.

And all these things are, like,

just started getting worse
and worse.

Teal made me question like

all of my childhood experiences

and everything
that I've gone through

and just, you know,

made me like
cut ties with family

and think this and accuse
my dad of sexual abuse

like awful stuff.

I told my ex-wife that wasn't
gonna pay a child support.

And she thought it's
because I didn't have the money.

But I was literally
not paying that money

because I was giving it all
to Teal.

She's mentioned and said this
so many times

when I was living there,

"We have to be willing to do

whatever it takes
for this cause.

This cause is more important
than our own lives."

When you have the mindset

of this is someone who's got

the most important work
in the world

who's been through
the most terrible torture

in all of humanity?

When you have that mindset,

anything she does is, like,

outweighed, like, it's either--
it's either, like,

her mission is too important

or her pain is too great.

Anything else
is like off the limit,

like, she can--
she can do whatever she wants.

MAN: We watched the thingy

with Oprah and Prince Harry
and Meghan.

JULIANA: Oh, yeah?

MAN: And Meghan did not feel

prepared for the Royal Family.

Nobody told her anything.

To prevent a crash,

we wanted to go through
all the things

which we signed up for

and then see where
it is compatible

and when it's not compatible,

for example,
what do you feel is yours?

And what do you feel is not
aligning with you, your needs?

JULIANA: I feel like whenever
we're on a workshop,

I feel like I'm,

like, in the right place

and it doesn't cost me
any energy.

MAN:
So the workshop, for example,

we've been working 14 hours

and then somebody has a crisis.

It's okay for you

to work another six hours
with that person?

I do not have
any problem with that.

MAN: Right, so that we basically
24/7 available?

-BLAKE: Yeah.
-JULIANA: Uh-hmm. Yeah.

BLAKE: Same.

MAN: But how does it look
at home,

so to say when we're not
on the tour?

There is no leisure travel
like you and Blake--

-I--
---cannot travel to Germany

without being related
to the company.

TEAL: There's no leisure travel.

-Teal and me...
-JULIANA: I would like

to find a way where we can--
where I can--

where I can see my family

and friends in Germany.

Like it's a need you have

is still a relationship
with my parents,

my family, and my friends.

TEAL: I just--
I feel like what's been--

not being talked about
is the fact

that this is not--a normal life

is not compatible with
the life that we are leading.

That's where there's
a disparity between us.

MAN: The reality of our life

is different
than you think it is.

[dramatic music playing]

[applause]

WOMAN: So I got to a point

where I had to
completely cut contact

with my parents.

Um, it was really hard,
but I did it.

And then I would get
all these thoughts of like,

"This is wrong.
I shouldn't be doing this.

I should make this work."

And what's
the resistance of that?

WOMAN: A part of me still,
like, wants the connection.

Here's little me,
like all alone.

And, like, how am I gonna--
how am I gonna make it?

TEAL: So I want you
to close your eyes.

Oh, God, okay.

TEAL:
Do you hear these footsteps

that are walking towards you?

WOMAN: Yes.

TEAL: This is somebody who's
coming to spend time with you.

You're not just
by yourself anymore.

I want you to feel us,
like, we're in there with you.

So, like we're on
the surface of things

just watching you there,
we're in that chaos.

-It's very peaceful here.
-TEAL: Yeah.

That's more
of what you really need.

You've been gaslit
your whole life.

What you feel is accurate.

There's nothing wrong with this.
This is what you're needing.

[gasps]

[cheers and applause]

Hey.

She likes to try
to eat the words.

Okay. I said I'm sorry.
I just wanna kiss you.

[dramatic music playing]

[keyboard clicking]

TEAL: What is the point
of me taking action?

One of the main reasons
that people don't take action

is because they're terrified
of making a change.

SABRINA: Back in 2015,
I was searching for help.

Just super depressed,
out of reality.

I had a therapist before
when I was younger, didn't work.

And I found Teal.

I was doing that,
like, kind of.

I went to a retreat
and Teal told me

that my parents don't love me.

Um, and that was huge.

And that was hard for me
to grasp because I was,

like, "I don't agree with you.

I feel like
my parents do love me."

But Teal is psychic,
so she knows.

Shortly after, I did move out
of my parent's house.

That was kind of
the last thing to fall for me

in terms of support that I had.

So I fell into a depression
and then I attempted suicide.

[sighs]

I'm in a tough spot.

I'm in a tough spot.

[airplane zooming out noise]

[dramatic music playing]

SABRINA:
I need to feel better.

Not in an abstract way.

TEAL: Gently turning
your attention inward.

Focus inside yourself.

Now think of an image
that perfectly

represents what you want.

SABRINA:
I can't have this hope.

Like it's gonna get better
in the future

or something like that.

TEAL: With each breath,

your legs now expand,
and contract.

SABRINA: This whole thing
is a leap of faith for me.

But honestly,
life is [bleep] painful,

so you really don't have--
it--that's the thing,

I think Teal says
that she's, like,

"You know how much
pain somebody has to be in

to finally come to me?"

That's the [bleep] truth,
man.

You have nothing else to lose.

[dramatic music playing]

Hi, everyone.

MAN: Hi.

TEAL: You guys look panicked.

I'm not gonna bite, I promise.

So how are we doing
this morning besides afraid?

[laughter]

TEAL: Okay. Before they start,
the first thing

I'm gonna tell you is
I held a very high standard

for my team members.

Like very, very high,
like, a lot of people

can't hack it level high.

So you can trust them.

Okay. Are we ready
for our first exercise?

-WOMAN: Yeah.
-MAN: Yes.

I have resistance to you now.

TEAL: To--you have
resistance to me now?

-I'm a little mad at you.
-For what?

Because my life
did not get better.

Everything got worse.

I'm sure you already know
that I attempted suicide

in January.
I don't know if you know that.

And I can't do this anymore.

It's like I've never been,
like, the last six years--yeah.

TEAL: Oh, look, I know it sucks,
but here's the thing,

it's my intention
that you feel better, right?

I want you to feel better.

I want you to walk out
this door feeling better.

But the reality is,
is that most adults today,

yourself included,

are living an inauthentic life.

Things fall apart because
they were not true to you.

SABRINA:
Is my life better now?

-I don't feel that it is.
-I--that's the thing.

SABRINA:
But I'm gonna ask you--

That's the thing.
Yeah.

SABRINA: It is better?

TEAL: Actually, yes.

That's bullshit.

-WOMAN: [gasps]
-[laughter]

MAN: Where's Sabrina?

She's upstairs, right?

I'm trying to see--yeah,
they're not there.

I think the door's closed
for a reason.

Hello?

Hello?

Somebody in there?

Do you want to check?

SABRINA: [loudly crying]

JULIANA: She said literally,
if I'm going home

and I don't feel better,

I wanna kill myself,

like she said that.

TEAL: [bleep].

I don't understand how to work
with a person like that

without the worst case
scenario happening, like,

she decides to commit suicide
after she gets back in New York.

And they're like,
"Oh, last week she was

at a Teal Swan workshop,"
and it's all over the place,

which is where
they're taking me.

MAN: Yeah.

So at the moment
it's, kind of, uh,

almost blackmailing
victim control--

-WOMAN: Yes.
---with them, all right?

-TEAL: Yes.
-MAN: Yeah, for sure.

It--uh, you choose
either you help her

or help them or your career.

TEAL: Exactly.

My problem is I want
to work with them.

Not like, "Oh, just don't."

The second someone says
they're suicidal

go the other [bleep] way.

Which is what I feel
like the message is right now.

I refuse to do that.

I need you to find a way
that I can do this.

JULIANA: I just can't talk
for myself.

I don't know how you guys
feel about that.

But she is in a lot of
resistance and a lot of pain.

And basically, like,
it scares her right now

because there's no plan B,

-so she doesn't feel safe--
-Fuck.

JULIANA: --and secure
which makes it more difficult.

MAN: I get all that.

But we're--
also dropping the ball here.

WOMAN: Teal needs
everyone together

and on the same page right now.

[dramatic music playing]

WOMAN:
[speaking foreign language]

JULIANA:
[speaking foreign language]

WOMAN:
[speaking foreign language]

Hmm, hmm.

WOMAN:
[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

JULIANA:
[speaking foreign language]

WOMAN: Okay.

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[wind gushing]

We are dancing around this,
every time you come.

SABRINA: [sighs]

TEAL: I want you
to start talking about

why you don't wanna be here.

SABRINA: I don't know.

I guess I just
can't appreciate things.

My mom used
to tell me that, she said,

"Nothing ever satisfies you."

She used to tell me.

I don't wanna align
with your mother.

Your mother's not right.

What it is is that
in your childhood,

nothing was safe to take in.

We're working with a split
within you

that has to do
with childhood trauma

and your worth issues.

Do you understand how
frustrating it is for a child

to be treated like shit but--

-Yes, I know.
-TEAL: --to literally

-have there be nothing?
-Yes, I know.

TEAL: Why aren't you letting
yourself get mad about that?

I'm not allowed to get mad.

TEAL: I just told you were.

-No.
-TEAL: I'm trying to know

what's real about you.

SABRINA: No.
No, bitch.

We're not going through my pain.
I'm not going through my pain.

TEAL:
You're a confusing person.

Because you come
to these workshops

and then you play
this game with me.

What is it gonna take you
to stop fighting?

I want you
to start talking about

why you don't wanna be
doing this?

-I wanna know.
-Because it's--

I don't think
it's gonna get better,

-for one.
-TEAL: All right.

Two, it hurts,
like, physically

I'm hurting
and it [bleep] sucks.

And I come here
to keep learning, and learning,

and learning,
and learning and going on this

[bleep] carousel over
and over and over again.

My life's retreats?

And in between,
we're in agony and talking

about the next retreat?

Holy [bleep].

I'm not signing up
for a life of this shit.

Like, I'm not doing this shit.

I'm not signing up--
I'm not doing that.

I'm not doing this.

[dramatic music playing]

TEAL: What the [bleep]
is going on with this?

What has to happen
for the people to realize

I have the information
that's gonna make it

so that your life changes?

Because of this last week,
I don't know what the answer is.

And it's like people
they don't [bleep]

actually see.
They don't see the truth.

I can tell you
what your issue is.

I--like, they need to know that.

MAN: There are two things
we wanted to do in general,

it's like, okay,
what do we do--

TEAL: People, like,
[bleep] hate.

I need you to realize this.
Like, people like [bleep]

hate me.

MAN: Why do you feel
you have haters?

TEAL: I have haters
because I wear high heels.

I have haters because I charge
$5,000 for people

to come to a private event
when they think I should do it

for free.

I have haters
because I'm a female

with [bleep] opinion
and I have power

and a vagina at the same time.

Just feels like my childhood
all over again.

-It's, like, I don't know--
-MAN: Okay.

-No, this has--
-TEAL: --what's happening.

MAN: --been done,
this is--Teal, we're still--

we're still in the dark.

Oh, my God.
My daughter never had an issue

with suicide until she talked
to Teal Swan.

Oh, yeah?
Read a [bleep].

I'm so tired of families
who are like,

"I don't know what happened."
I'm like, "You [bleep] happened.

Of course,
your daughter killed herself."

Jesus [bleep] Christ.

If people don't start doing
this kind of work on themselves,

they're running off
a [bleep] cliff.

I can see that,
but people aren't--some people

are not ready to do that.
Doing that--

-do--what do you want?
-TEAL: Then they're gonna die.

-That's the thing.
-Do you want to force them?

TEAL: Oh, [bleep], yeah.

JULIANA: I don't feel
like we can force them.

It doesn't work that way.

TEAL: That's bullshit.

That's bullshit.

You literally
just crossed the line.

Now we have problems.

[dramatic music playing]

[birds chirping]

MAN: As outsiders,
we see the damage

that's being done,
but if you go on the inside,

they're conditioned
not to see it.

Every month I would have these
massive depressive episodes.

I've never had that before
or since really.

I've definitely--you know,
I still--I still struggle

with depression and stuff.

But it was never as bad
as it was when I was doing

charity work and when
I was listening to what Teal

had to say and taking it
and applying it in my life.

WOMAN: In a conflict,
put me in a position

and then here I was
[indistinct] ultimately

of planning suicide myself.

Yet, I had just--I had
to get away from it all.

[keyboard clicking]

MOLLY:
From what I have learned

from the people who have left
the organization

we appear to be running
into some big red flags.

And I've gotta pull myself
back together,

try to refocus and try to find
the truth in this mess,

it's a mess.

And then I was given a document

that I was shocked
that they shared with me,

which is called
"The Non-Negotiables."

And this is a list of the things
that people have to agree to

if they're going to be part
of this inner circle.

And it does not read well.

[cell phone ringing]

-[cell phone beeps]
-Blake.

-BLAKE: Hello.
-Hey, thanks for calling.

You got a minute?

I wanted to follow up with you.

-BLAKE: Sure, yeah.
-Good.

I'm not sure if you're aware
but Matia shared with me

the document called
The Non-Negotiables.

-And--
-BLAKE: Oh, yeah?

Can you answer some questions
about that?

BLAKE: I don't know.
I don't have them

in front of me,

but I haven't read them
in a while.

MOLLY: Okay.

Well, it's--you can't put
your own family first,

the--Teal has to come first.

If she wants you there,
she gets you.

The priority
of the entire community

is whatever is in
the best interest of Teal,

everything else
is second to that.

You can't have
personal boundaries

that have, in any way,
an effect on Teal.

So here's how
this one's written.

"You will now be
in the world of fame.

This makes relationships very,

very complicated
and often painful.

Your associations
are in fact your potential

biggest liability.

Anyone you introduce
to the community could turn

on Teal, blackmail her,
rip the community apart,

put extra pressure on Teal

or other members
of the community.

Uh, when fame
and money is involved,

people simply cannot be trusted.

Your life is not going
to even remotely

-resemble normal."
-BLAKE: Uh-huh.

"If you want to have
a normal life, do not choose

to be part of the inner circle."

And it goes on.

BLAKE: Uh-hmm.

MOLLY: Did you ever
have any issues

or feelings
about the Non-Negotiables?

BLAKE: Um, I mean,
I was fine with stuff

pretty much,
but Teal always refers it to,

like, joining
the military or something.

What did you think
when you first read all that?

That most of it is illegal.

That was my first reaction.

Part of my job here is to try
to figure out

if this is a cult or not.

And then I get this document,

and it's--I have a checklist

that I'm going through, saying,

"Yup, cult, cult."

I mean, it's all on
the list of things

that I'm having to use
to define what a cult is.

And I know this doesn't apply
to the outer circles

of participants.

But there's enough people on
this list that this is supposed

to apply to, that it's put me

in an uncomfortable position.

BLAKE: Right.

There's, like, some truth
in it and I see

how [bleep] up it sounds.

You always have Teal there
going, like,

"Do you want this?"

You know.
"Are you in alignment with this?

Tell me."
You know. "Be honest."

And she is like,
incredibly empathetic.

And so, she's always
checking with people

whether it's working
with them or not.

And do you think--
do you honestly, Blake,

feel that it would be
comfortable to say

I'm not in alignment with this,

because to say that would

be to be kicked out,
wouldn't it?

BLAKE: Yeah, no.

-Right.
-BLAKE: I think so.

[dramatic music playing]

JULIANA: Before I came here,
I perceived Teal as caring.

She was, like, committed
to finding out

the truth and wanted to do
the right thing.

So and then, like, I'm--

yeah, I gave up a whole life
over there in Germany.

So then I'm like,
"Oh, yeah, you know."

When I'm committing,
I'm committing.

And my experience
was a little bit like

falling into a hole,
like, after that.

It's like,
"Oh, wow, it's not

what I thought it would be."

She's not in the space anymore
where she's just

a spiritual teacher.

There's definitely
another level to it.

I don't know
how long I can take it.

-MAN: Yeah.
-WOMAN: Yeah.

Okay. So I'm gonna put
something to you first.

Some of you guys in this group,

you're fighting against
whatever is in front of you.

And unless we deal
with that you're [bleep].

So with that in mind,
we're going to be doing

something called water breaths.

It is a terrifying feeling,
it is like a hair raising

on the back
of your neck feeling,

but I also cannot stress
how powerful this is.

You're using your body to hack
into the subconscious mind.

And down there,
it's not gonna be fun.

[dramatic music playing]

TEAL: I know first-hand
that this is incredibly painful.

But this is a purge.

[soft drum beating]

TEAL: Self-awareness
does not come naturally

to those who avoid pain.

Imagine your breath
embracing the emotion.

This is what I want for you.

[soft drum beats]

[screams]

[gasps]

SABRINA: I love you.

[cries]

[dramatic music playing]

SINGER: ♪ The past♪

♪ So you're not supposed
to visit♪

♪ Then I can hang around♪

♪ Down, down, down, down♪

MOLLY: I'm concerned
about her followers

because these
are fragile people.

TEAL: You feel
like an adversary to me

and I need that to change.

I'm afraid, actually.

BLAKE: I am posting
in the Teal Tribe

everything that's happening.

This is like a nightmare.

It feels like the person
closest to you

has completely
fucked your life.

He's the one
that talked me out of trust.

He just ruined it all.

SINGER: ♪ Down, down♪

♪ [indistinct]♪

♪ You know you've got
[indistinct]♪

♪ Don't let it get you down,
down, down♪