All language subtitles for Columbo S02E04 Dagger of the Mind 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DD+2 0 H 264-playWEB (1)_track3_[eng]

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,784 --> 00:00:03,090 [woman screaming] 2 00:00:03,133 --> 00:00:05,440 -Stop it! 3 00:00:05,483 --> 00:00:06,615 -I think it was you. 4 00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:08,182 [gasp] 5 00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:09,313 COLUMBO [OFFSCREEN]: That's Big Ben, isn't it? 6 00:00:09,357 --> 00:00:10,619 Boy, that's terrific. 7 00:00:10,662 --> 00:00:12,360 Thing that old, it's only a minute slow. 8 00:00:12,403 --> 00:00:14,753 -Not that our little rendezvous meant very much. 9 00:00:14,797 --> 00:00:16,190 -Don't be so ridiculous. 10 00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:17,756 No one will believe that. 11 00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:20,107 -From what I hear, your wife might know Sir Roger better 12 00:00:20,150 --> 00:00:21,151 than you do, sir. 13 00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,066 -Filthy snoop. 14 00:00:23,110 --> 00:00:24,328 -Ma'am, I didn't mean to pry. 15 00:00:24,372 --> 00:00:26,591 -I can handle Miss Dudley. 16 00:00:26,635 --> 00:00:27,766 -Pardon me. 17 00:00:32,423 --> 00:00:42,433 [music playing] 18 00:00:42,477 --> 00:00:52,487 [music playing] 19 00:00:52,530 --> 00:01:02,453 [music playing] 20 00:01:02,497 --> 00:01:12,507 [music playing] 21 00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:22,473 [music playing] 22 00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:32,527 [music playing] 23 00:01:32,570 --> 00:01:40,404 [music playing] 24 00:01:40,448 --> 00:01:42,406 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: Not only do I need to see to 25 00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:45,670 play this part, the character is not a pauper, so that can 26 00:01:45,714 --> 00:01:46,410 go-- 27 00:01:46,454 --> 00:01:47,629 -All right. 28 00:01:47,672 --> 00:01:48,630 We will change the crown in the third act. 29 00:01:48,673 --> 00:01:50,414 Make a note, Miss Dudley. 30 00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:51,198 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: And how about the heater in my 31 00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:52,503 dressing room? 32 00:01:52,547 --> 00:01:54,288 The whole thing's going to explode any moment. 33 00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:56,899 -I told the stage doorman, and he will fix it when he can. 34 00:01:56,942 --> 00:01:59,815 Now Lily, at your entrance at the top of the dagger scene-- 35 00:01:59,858 --> 00:02:01,164 -My entrance? 36 00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:02,774 That scenery is covered in nails. 37 00:02:02,818 --> 00:02:04,602 If you want to see me disrobed and disemboweled, just carry 38 00:02:04,646 --> 00:02:06,169 on like this. 39 00:02:06,213 --> 00:02:07,605 -Lily, they are hammering as fast as they can. 40 00:02:07,649 --> 00:02:09,303 Now can we please get back to the subject at hand? 41 00:02:09,346 --> 00:02:11,435 Which in this case happens to be your emergence at the top 42 00:02:11,479 --> 00:02:12,784 of the scene. 43 00:02:12,828 --> 00:02:13,655 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: My emergence at 44 00:02:13,698 --> 00:02:15,439 the top of the scene-- 45 00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:16,266 DIRECTOR [OFFSCREEN]: Now I've asked you repeatedly to play 46 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:17,441 it with more speed. 47 00:02:17,485 --> 00:02:18,442 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: Come at 48 00:02:18,486 --> 00:02:19,878 exactly the wrong moment. 49 00:02:19,922 --> 00:02:21,358 DIRECTOR [OFFSCREEN]: And with more conviction. 50 00:02:21,402 --> 00:02:22,533 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: Conviction? 51 00:02:22,577 --> 00:02:23,578 DIRECTOR [OFFSCREEN]: And you have 52 00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:25,319 repeatedly ignored my requests. 53 00:02:25,362 --> 00:02:26,233 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: I am playing it at the pace 54 00:02:26,276 --> 00:02:27,669 that I always play it. 55 00:02:27,712 --> 00:02:29,410 -A-ha, Miss Dudley, more of his stupid notes, huh? 56 00:02:29,453 --> 00:02:29,801 Why don't you bring them back to my dressing room later, 57 00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:30,454 and-- 58 00:02:30,498 --> 00:02:31,368 -Nicky? 59 00:02:31,412 --> 00:02:32,804 -Uh, no, no, better not. 60 00:02:32,848 --> 00:02:33,631 DIRECTOR [OFFSCREEN]: Where the devil have you been? 61 00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:35,416 -To see the queen. 62 00:02:35,459 --> 00:02:36,852 -Look, we're an hour late now for the dinner break, and I 63 00:02:36,895 --> 00:02:38,593 would like to get this curtain up before midnight. 64 00:02:38,636 --> 00:02:39,463 -Don't worry, dear boy. 65 00:02:39,507 --> 00:02:40,290 It'll be up by dark. 66 00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:41,857 -Oh, yes? 67 00:02:41,900 --> 00:02:43,598 Well, I've got at least 30 changes to argue with you, and 68 00:02:43,641 --> 00:02:44,425 Lily keeps insisting-- 69 00:02:44,468 --> 00:02:45,339 -Argue? 70 00:02:45,382 --> 00:02:46,557 We'll do whatever you say. 71 00:02:46,601 --> 00:02:48,559 Aren't we always the little lambs? 72 00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:49,821 -Nick, are you smashed? 73 00:02:49,865 --> 00:02:51,475 -Pay no attention to him, darling. 74 00:02:51,519 --> 00:02:53,303 Directors are always hysterics. 75 00:02:53,347 --> 00:02:56,698 -My gracious wife forgives you. 76 00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:58,656 Now off to the pub, everyone. 77 00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,484 Tonight's only dress rehearsal, remember? 78 00:03:04,532 --> 00:03:06,403 Well, what are you waiting to see? 79 00:03:06,447 --> 00:03:08,231 Clear out of our castle! 80 00:03:08,275 --> 00:03:09,232 -All right. 81 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:10,494 Everybody back in one hour. 82 00:03:10,538 --> 00:03:13,932 [laughter] 83 00:03:13,976 --> 00:03:17,806 -Lily, my love, how would you like to do "A Doll's House" in 84 00:03:17,849 --> 00:03:18,633 New York, late next season? 85 00:03:18,676 --> 00:03:19,634 [laughter] 86 00:03:19,677 --> 00:03:21,288 -Or star-- 87 00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:23,812 star in some magnificent film at Sir Roger's expense? 88 00:03:23,855 --> 00:03:25,770 [laughter] 89 00:03:25,814 --> 00:03:26,989 -Lover! 90 00:04:19,084 --> 00:04:24,394 -[humming] 91 00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:25,395 Hey! 92 00:04:25,439 --> 00:04:27,310 Muh, muh, muh-muh-muh-muh. 93 00:04:27,354 --> 00:04:28,703 -Nicky, for heaven's sake. 94 00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:32,446 -Hun, hun, hun, hun, hunger! 95 00:04:32,489 --> 00:04:33,055 Hunger! 96 00:04:33,098 --> 00:04:37,364 [vocalizing] 97 00:04:37,407 --> 00:04:38,452 -Lover! 98 00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:40,715 What a gorgeous surprise! 99 00:04:40,758 --> 00:04:43,631 But you never come to dress rehearsal. 100 00:04:43,674 --> 00:04:46,677 -I think I managed to get in without being noticed. 101 00:04:46,721 --> 00:04:48,984 -But you couldn't stand not seeing me for another whole 102 00:04:49,027 --> 00:04:52,596 day, could you? 103 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,598 Is anything wrong? 104 00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:56,426 You're not worried about this production of 105 00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:57,775 "Macbeth," are you? 106 00:04:57,819 --> 00:04:59,386 We're going to get rave notices. 107 00:04:59,429 --> 00:05:00,430 [laughs] 108 00:05:00,474 --> 00:05:01,605 Well, you know actors. 109 00:05:01,649 --> 00:05:03,346 We're all just children anyway. 110 00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:04,521 -Children? 111 00:05:06,175 --> 00:05:09,134 -Roger, I had the most perfect idea for Sunday. 112 00:05:09,178 --> 00:05:11,049 I was walking past Covent Garden. 113 00:05:11,093 --> 00:05:12,790 Nick'll never know. 114 00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:14,618 He'll think I've gone to visit my cousin with arthritis. 115 00:05:14,662 --> 00:05:17,360 So I got us two seats for the symphony. 116 00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,580 We'll be all alone in the box together. 117 00:05:19,623 --> 00:05:21,582 And then afterwards-- 118 00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:22,844 -Afterwards? 119 00:05:22,887 --> 00:05:27,370 What do you think I am, you lying-- 120 00:05:27,414 --> 00:05:28,980 you didn't buy those tickets today. 121 00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:30,417 Your husband did. 122 00:05:30,460 --> 00:05:31,940 -What? 123 00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:34,116 -And last weekend at Brighton, I suppose he arranged 124 00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:37,032 that for us, too. 125 00:05:37,075 --> 00:05:39,861 Not that our little rendezvous meant very much. 126 00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:42,037 You so conveniently had a headache. 127 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:42,994 -Ha-- 128 00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:45,127 ahh, Roger, old boy. 129 00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:47,434 Now this is a pleasant surprise. 130 00:05:47,477 --> 00:05:49,610 Lily, what a curious position. 131 00:05:49,653 --> 00:05:53,396 -You, you conniving panderer, you put her up to every bit of 132 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:54,397 it. 133 00:05:54,441 --> 00:05:55,746 -He's gone out of his mind. 134 00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:57,487 He's come straight out of a Victorian novel. 135 00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:00,664 -And all just to lure me into reopening my theater, into 136 00:06:00,708 --> 00:06:04,799 backing you, and into playing angel to a has-been leading 137 00:06:04,842 --> 00:06:06,757 man and his aging ingenue. 138 00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:07,758 -Listen to him! 139 00:06:07,802 --> 00:06:09,412 -Lily, be quiet. 140 00:06:09,456 --> 00:06:10,848 Really, Sir Roger, I-- 141 00:06:10,892 --> 00:06:14,199 I don't know who's been telling you stories, but if 142 00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:16,898 you're implying any misunderstanding of my wife's 143 00:06:16,941 --> 00:06:19,727 deep devotion to you, why, she looks on you as her own 144 00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:21,032 father, don't you, Lily? 145 00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:22,643 -That's enough! 146 00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:25,515 Today I finally realized, after all my years as a 147 00:06:25,559 --> 00:06:28,605 producer, I've simply being taken-- 148 00:06:28,649 --> 00:06:30,781 taken by a ham and a tart. 149 00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:32,696 -Roger, I'll forgive your nasty language-- 150 00:06:32,740 --> 00:06:34,263 -You've just helped me decide. 151 00:06:34,306 --> 00:06:37,571 There won't be any "Macbeth." I'm going out and tell the 152 00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:38,963 whole company. 153 00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:41,139 This play is not only cancelled, but I'll see to it 154 00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:43,881 that neither one of you ever works again on any stage! 155 00:06:43,925 --> 00:06:45,056 -Stop him! 156 00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:48,103 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: Roger! 157 00:06:48,146 --> 00:06:49,104 -Nick, no-- 158 00:06:49,147 --> 00:06:51,672 -Let go of me. 159 00:06:51,715 --> 00:06:52,542 -Stop it! 160 00:06:52,586 --> 00:06:54,065 Stop it, both of you! 161 00:07:11,822 --> 00:07:13,215 [knock] 162 00:07:13,258 --> 00:07:14,085 STAGEHAND [OFFSCREEN]: Miss Stanhope, 163 00:07:14,129 --> 00:07:15,217 everything all right? 164 00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:16,218 -What? 165 00:07:16,261 --> 00:07:17,872 Yes. 166 00:07:17,915 --> 00:07:18,916 STAGEHAND [OFFSCREEN]: Is Mr. Frame in there with you? 167 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:20,483 We're about ready for curtain. 168 00:07:20,527 --> 00:07:22,180 -Oh, just a little family fight, that's all. 169 00:07:22,224 --> 00:07:23,573 We'll be ready. 170 00:07:26,707 --> 00:07:28,491 -[WHISPERING] Dead? 171 00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,972 -[WHISPERING] Dead. 172 00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:32,930 -Nick, I didn't mean to. 173 00:07:32,974 --> 00:07:33,931 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: Well, of 174 00:07:33,975 --> 00:07:34,758 course you didn't, darling. 175 00:07:34,802 --> 00:07:37,892 Neither of us did. 176 00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:39,241 What are we going to do? 177 00:07:39,284 --> 00:07:42,157 -I could tell them that he attacked us. 178 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:43,767 It was self-defense, you know? 179 00:07:43,811 --> 00:07:44,768 -Sir Roger-- 180 00:07:44,812 --> 00:07:46,204 Sir Roger Haversham? 181 00:07:46,248 --> 00:07:47,162 Don't be so ridiculous. 182 00:07:47,205 --> 00:07:51,122 No one would believe that. 183 00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:54,125 Hey, Nicky, he said that no one saw him 184 00:07:54,169 --> 00:07:56,127 come in here tonight. 185 00:07:56,171 --> 00:07:57,738 [knocking] 186 00:07:57,781 --> 00:07:58,869 STAGEHAND [OFFSCREEN]: Places, please. 187 00:07:58,913 --> 00:08:00,001 First act places, Miss Stanhope. 188 00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:11,882 [KNOCKIN 189 00:08:11,926 --> 00:08:15,799 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: Whence is that knocking? 190 00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:18,802 How is't with me when every noise appalls me? 191 00:08:22,197 --> 00:08:25,156 What hands are here? 192 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,157 Ha! 193 00:08:26,201 --> 00:08:28,856 They pluck out mine eyes. 194 00:08:28,899 --> 00:08:31,293 [gasps] 195 00:08:31,336 --> 00:08:34,818 Will all great Neptune's ocean wash this blood 196 00:08:34,862 --> 00:08:37,081 clean from my hand? 197 00:08:37,125 --> 00:08:40,171 No, this my hand will rather the multitudinous seas 198 00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:43,958 incarnadine, making the green one red. 199 00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:47,701 -My hands are of your color, but I shame to 200 00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:49,180 wear a heart so white. 201 00:08:49,224 --> 00:08:51,269 [knocking] 202 00:08:51,313 --> 00:08:53,141 -I hear a knocking at the south entry. 203 00:08:53,184 --> 00:08:54,577 Retire we to our chamber. 204 00:08:54,621 --> 00:08:57,275 A little water clears us of this dead. 205 00:08:57,319 --> 00:08:59,756 How easy is it, then! 206 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:02,193 Your constancy hath left you unintended. 207 00:09:02,237 --> 00:09:06,981 Be not lost so poorly in thy thoughts. 208 00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:10,680 -To know my deed, 'twere best not know myself. 209 00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:12,203 [knocking] 210 00:09:12,247 --> 00:09:15,685 -Wake Duncan with thy knocking! 211 00:09:15,729 --> 00:09:19,080 I would thou couldst! 212 00:09:19,123 --> 00:09:20,734 -Did you call Rogers' club? 213 00:09:20,777 --> 00:09:22,953 -Yes, yes, they said he hadn't been in town all day. 214 00:09:22,997 --> 00:09:24,999 -But he must have talked to someone. 215 00:09:25,042 --> 00:09:26,870 -Makes no difference, Nick. 216 00:09:26,914 --> 00:09:28,872 The club was positive that Roger was alone 217 00:09:28,916 --> 00:09:30,221 at home this evening. 218 00:09:30,265 --> 00:09:32,136 So I said never mind, I wouldn't disturb him. 219 00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:33,224 -Knock, knock! 220 00:09:33,268 --> 00:09:33,964 -At home? 221 00:09:34,008 --> 00:09:34,617 That's 20 miles. 222 00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:35,357 -Shhh! 223 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,140 You're coming unglued. 224 00:09:36,184 --> 00:09:37,054 -Oh, oh, go on. 225 00:09:37,098 --> 00:09:38,360 Go on. 226 00:09:38,403 --> 00:09:40,710 -Here's a farmer, that hanged himself on the 227 00:09:40,754 --> 00:09:43,060 expectation of plenty. 228 00:09:43,104 --> 00:09:46,194 Come in time, where napkins enough about you. 229 00:09:46,237 --> 00:09:47,804 Here, you'll sweat for it. 230 00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:48,718 [knocking] 231 00:09:48,762 --> 00:09:50,415 -Knock, knock, knock. 232 00:09:50,459 --> 00:09:58,772 [repeated clanging] 233 00:09:58,815 --> 00:10:00,687 -What on Earth's going on? 234 00:10:00,730 --> 00:10:02,906 -Oh, excuse me, ma'am. 235 00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:04,342 I-- 236 00:10:04,386 --> 00:10:05,866 I thought it's be a good chance to fix your heater 237 00:10:05,909 --> 00:10:07,432 pipes here. 238 00:10:07,476 --> 00:10:09,086 You know, what with all that knocking going on out there. 239 00:10:09,130 --> 00:10:11,306 I won't be a jiffy. 240 00:10:11,349 --> 00:10:12,916 Right, I think I better move this a bit. 241 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,222 -No! 242 00:10:14,265 --> 00:10:15,702 Don't bother with the heater tonight, Joe. 243 00:10:15,745 --> 00:10:17,399 -What, and have you freezing from icicles? 244 00:10:17,442 --> 00:10:19,227 Oh, no, no, no, no, ma'am. 245 00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:22,883 No leading lady's going to go tripping over pipes and tools 246 00:10:22,926 --> 00:10:24,841 what I leave lying all over her boudoir. 247 00:10:24,885 --> 00:10:25,450 -That's all right, Joe. 248 00:10:25,494 --> 00:10:26,321 I don't mind. 249 00:10:26,364 --> 00:10:27,714 Fix it tomorrow. 250 00:10:32,806 --> 00:10:34,024 -Just wanted you to be comfortable. 251 00:10:37,201 --> 00:10:38,681 -Very kind of you, Joe. 252 00:10:51,955 --> 00:10:54,131 -The Queen, my lord, is dead. 253 00:10:58,919 --> 00:10:59,789 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: She 254 00:10:59,833 --> 00:11:02,400 should have died hereafter. 255 00:11:02,444 --> 00:11:07,797 There would have been a time for such a word. 256 00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:12,062 Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow. 257 00:11:12,106 --> 00:11:14,151 -It'll be tomorrow if you don't get a move on. 258 00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:15,936 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: Creeps in this petty pace from 259 00:11:15,979 --> 00:11:21,332 day to day to the last syllable of recorded time, and 260 00:11:21,376 --> 00:11:24,858 all our yesterdays have lighted fools the 261 00:11:24,901 --> 00:11:28,339 way to dusty death. 262 00:11:28,383 --> 00:11:32,866 Out, out brief candle! 263 00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:37,740 Life is but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and 264 00:11:37,784 --> 00:11:40,874 frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more. 265 00:11:40,917 --> 00:11:46,793 It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, 266 00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:49,360 signifying nothing. 267 00:12:04,201 --> 00:12:05,376 -I found his car. 268 00:12:05,420 --> 00:12:07,030 I brought around close in the alley. 269 00:12:07,074 --> 00:12:08,292 -Cheerio, Mr. Frame. 270 00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:11,382 It stopped raining, you know. 271 00:12:11,426 --> 00:12:12,557 -Oh, it did? 272 00:12:12,601 --> 00:12:13,907 That's so nice. 273 00:12:13,950 --> 00:12:16,257 -I--I'm sorry I'm so slow. 274 00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:18,302 I guess we're the last ones. 275 00:12:18,346 --> 00:12:19,521 -Yes. 276 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,092 -Still 20 minutes to closing time next door, Joe. 277 00:12:25,135 --> 00:12:27,268 Here, on us. 278 00:12:27,311 --> 00:12:28,182 -Oh. 279 00:12:28,225 --> 00:12:29,444 -I'll lock up for you. 280 00:12:29,487 --> 00:12:31,359 -Well, that's most gracious of you, sir. 281 00:12:31,402 --> 00:12:32,490 Bless you both. 282 00:12:32,534 --> 00:12:33,840 'Night, Miss Stanhope. 283 00:12:47,941 --> 00:12:49,159 -Roger's umbrella! 284 00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:41,995 [dog barking] 285 00:15:28,405 --> 00:15:32,409 -[laughs] 286 00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:35,412 If it were done when 'tis done, then 'twere well it were 287 00:15:35,456 --> 00:15:38,024 done quickly. 288 00:15:38,067 --> 00:15:39,242 -He had a dirty mind. 289 00:16:23,808 --> 00:16:25,288 -Hello, Freddy, what's up? 290 00:16:25,332 --> 00:16:26,768 -Scotland Yard out there. 291 00:16:26,811 --> 00:16:28,030 They muffed it. 292 00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:29,249 Lost some bloke in the airport. 293 00:16:29,292 --> 00:16:30,598 -Dangerous? 294 00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:32,556 -No, a big VIP coming in from the States. 295 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:33,557 Missed him entirely. 296 00:16:33,601 --> 00:16:35,342 -Bit of an embarrassment, eh? 297 00:16:35,385 --> 00:16:37,735 -Excuse me, sir, you didn't happen to notice my luggage? 298 00:16:37,779 --> 00:16:38,823 Purple kind of flowers? 299 00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:40,129 Actually, it's my wife's. 300 00:16:40,173 --> 00:16:42,218 -Luggage inquiries, bear left, sir. 301 00:16:42,262 --> 00:16:43,741 -I was in there, sir. 302 00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:45,091 There was no one there. 303 00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:59,061 Ma'am, you don't mind if I just take a look at this loose 304 00:16:59,105 --> 00:17:00,541 handle here? 305 00:17:00,584 --> 00:17:01,672 You see, last night when my wife was packing, I happened 306 00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:03,065 to notice-- 307 00:17:03,109 --> 00:17:05,067 -I haven't seen any senate or film star 308 00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:06,329 types in here, Freddy? 309 00:17:06,373 --> 00:17:07,635 Now why don't you-- 310 00:17:07,678 --> 00:17:08,679 -He's some ruddy great detective from Los 311 00:17:08,723 --> 00:17:10,072 Angeles, that's ho. 312 00:17:10,116 --> 00:17:10,638 -Detective? 313 00:17:10,681 --> 00:17:13,510 [clattering] 314 00:17:13,554 --> 00:17:14,772 -Ma'am, I'm terribly sorry. 315 00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:15,599 I didn't mean to do that. 316 00:17:15,643 --> 00:17:16,687 I thought it was my bag. 317 00:17:16,731 --> 00:17:17,645 -My suitcase! 318 00:17:17,688 --> 00:17:18,820 -I've lost my bag, ma'am. 319 00:17:18,863 --> 00:17:20,474 This is not mine. 320 00:17:20,517 --> 00:17:21,475 I know that now, but I saw the purple on the outside. 321 00:17:21,518 --> 00:17:22,389 -No, it's mine, thank you. 322 00:17:22,432 --> 00:17:24,173 -Little mix-up, eh, sir? 323 00:17:24,217 --> 00:17:25,696 Now you don't mine if we have a look at your baggage stubs, 324 00:17:25,740 --> 00:17:26,697 now do you? 325 00:17:26,741 --> 00:17:28,569 -Uh, well, I don't have any. 326 00:17:28,612 --> 00:17:30,092 That's the problem, sir. 327 00:17:30,136 --> 00:17:31,180 I thought I had some. 328 00:17:31,224 --> 00:17:32,616 I had them here on my passport. 329 00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:35,097 Came in on 28, 707 from LA, and I thought I had 330 00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:36,664 them right in here. 331 00:17:36,707 --> 00:17:39,101 I think I made a mistake when I came in the wrong door-- 332 00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:40,581 -Quite so, sir. 333 00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,191 Now you don't mind just stepping over here with me, do 334 00:17:42,235 --> 00:17:43,366 you? 335 00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:44,150 -Well, I'd like to help this lady-- 336 00:17:44,193 --> 00:17:45,455 -No, thank you. 337 00:17:45,499 --> 00:17:47,196 -I'm quite sure you can explain it all to the 338 00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:48,197 inspector, sir. 339 00:17:48,241 --> 00:17:48,893 -I want to apologize, ma'am. 340 00:17:48,937 --> 00:17:49,590 I certainly didn't-- 341 00:17:49,633 --> 00:17:50,373 -This way, sir. 342 00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:51,287 -Uh, one moment. 343 00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:52,506 Thank you very much. 344 00:18:05,867 --> 00:18:06,911 -Any luck? 345 00:18:06,955 --> 00:18:08,130 -'Fraid not, Sarge. 346 00:18:08,174 --> 00:18:09,784 Usual lot. 347 00:18:09,827 --> 00:18:11,481 -Bloody hell. 348 00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:12,917 -Well, it's not your fault he missed his plane, Sarge. 349 00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:14,223 -He didn't miss it. 350 00:18:14,267 --> 00:18:15,529 I've just checked with the airline. 351 00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:16,834 -Freddy, not a police lieutenant, is he? 352 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,401 I was just about to put the arm on this 353 00:18:18,445 --> 00:18:19,141 light-finger bloke-- 354 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:21,187 -You what? 355 00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:21,883 Where? 356 00:18:21,926 --> 00:18:22,710 -Over there, sir. 357 00:18:22,753 --> 00:18:23,276 -Him? 358 00:18:23,319 --> 00:18:24,538 Blimey. 359 00:18:29,630 --> 00:18:30,935 -There he is, Sarge. 360 00:18:33,764 --> 00:18:35,244 -You have everything back in-- 361 00:18:35,288 --> 00:18:36,332 LADY [OFFSCREEN]: Yes, I'm-- oh, these. 362 00:18:36,376 --> 00:18:37,725 I need these. 363 00:18:37,768 --> 00:18:39,205 -You understand, I thought it was my suitcase-- 364 00:18:39,248 --> 00:18:40,162 -Excuse me, is this lady causing you a problem? 365 00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:40,858 -They both had flowers. 366 00:18:40,902 --> 00:18:42,338 I'm sorry? 367 00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:43,165 -Is this lady causing you a problem, sir? 368 00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:44,166 -Beg your pardon? 369 00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:45,385 No, not at all. 370 00:18:45,428 --> 00:18:48,214 -I'm Sergeant O'Keefe, Scotland Yard. 371 00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:49,171 Lieutenant. 372 00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:50,346 -This is all my fault. 373 00:18:50,390 --> 00:18:51,782 -I'm here to escort you to London, sir. 374 00:18:51,826 --> 00:18:54,176 I'm sorry I, uh, I missed you at the plane, sir. 375 00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:55,177 -How do you do, Sergeant? 376 00:18:55,221 --> 00:18:56,178 -How do you do, Lieutenant? 377 00:18:56,222 --> 00:18:56,744 -Well, this is a great honor. 378 00:18:56,787 --> 00:18:57,962 -Well. 379 00:18:58,006 --> 00:18:59,964 Yeah, the car's just parked outside. 380 00:19:00,008 --> 00:19:01,401 -Would you excuse me, please? 381 00:19:01,444 --> 00:19:02,619 I-- 382 00:19:02,663 --> 00:19:03,577 -Ma'am, I'm terribly sorry about that. 383 00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:05,274 -All right, all right. 384 00:19:05,318 --> 00:19:07,581 -The problem here is I seem to have lost my suitcase. 385 00:19:07,624 --> 00:19:09,757 -Then the Yard will find it for you, sir. 386 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,411 The least we can do for an honored guest, eh? 387 00:19:11,454 --> 00:19:12,542 -Don't want to be a nuisance. 388 00:19:12,586 --> 00:19:13,369 -No, no, no, it's no trouble, sir. 389 00:19:13,413 --> 00:19:14,718 -Oh, fine. 390 00:19:14,762 --> 00:19:17,417 -Already, we've found your passport for you. 391 00:19:17,460 --> 00:19:20,768 Oh, and the commissioner's office asked me to give you 392 00:19:20,811 --> 00:19:24,293 their official welcome, Lieutenant. 393 00:19:24,337 --> 00:19:26,469 Even if I did muck up the red carpet business of it, sir. 394 00:19:26,513 --> 00:19:28,471 -Well, it's great-- it's great to be here. 395 00:19:28,515 --> 00:19:29,472 How do you do? 396 00:19:29,516 --> 00:19:30,386 -How do you do? 397 00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:31,431 -Lieutenant Columbo. 398 00:19:31,474 --> 00:19:32,432 -How do you do, Lieutenant? 399 00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:34,303 -Thank you very, very much. 400 00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:36,610 You know, just to be here, Scotland Yard, Jack the 401 00:19:36,653 --> 00:19:37,915 Ripper, and all that. 402 00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:38,829 -Well, well-- 403 00:19:38,873 --> 00:19:39,743 -Thank you very much. 404 00:19:39,787 --> 00:19:40,614 -This way, Lieutenant. 405 00:19:40,657 --> 00:19:41,571 -Oh, fine. 406 00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:42,442 -I've got the car waiting. 407 00:19:42,485 --> 00:19:43,312 -Take it easy, will you? 408 00:19:43,356 --> 00:19:46,576 -Thank you very much. 409 00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:48,012 -Here, sir. 410 00:19:48,056 --> 00:19:49,579 -Right here, fine. 411 00:20:23,918 --> 00:20:33,928 [marching band playing] 412 00:20:33,971 --> 00:20:43,981 [marching band playing] 413 00:20:44,025 --> 00:20:53,948 [marching band playing] 414 00:20:53,991 --> 00:21:06,308 [marching band playing] 415 00:21:06,352 --> 00:21:07,701 [camera clicking] 416 00:21:16,710 --> 00:21:18,320 [camera clicking] 417 00:21:24,152 --> 00:21:26,328 [camera clicking] 418 00:21:26,372 --> 00:21:36,338 [marching band playing] 419 00:21:36,382 --> 00:21:46,392 [marching band playing] 420 00:21:46,435 --> 00:21:56,358 [marching band playing] 421 00:21:56,402 --> 00:22:03,539 [marching band playing] 422 00:22:03,583 --> 00:22:04,975 -Gee, thanks for stopping. 423 00:22:05,019 --> 00:22:06,499 -Not a trouble at all. 424 00:22:06,542 --> 00:22:07,935 -Wait till my brother-in-law sees that picture. 425 00:22:07,978 --> 00:22:09,023 Thank you very much for stopping. 426 00:22:09,066 --> 00:22:11,155 I borrowed this camera from him. 427 00:22:11,199 --> 00:22:12,635 See, he's in the National Guard. 428 00:22:12,679 --> 00:22:14,855 He thinks he looks good in his uniform. 429 00:22:14,898 --> 00:22:16,465 -Certainly, Lieutenant. 430 00:22:16,509 --> 00:22:18,815 -Gee, I hope I put the film in right. 431 00:22:18,859 --> 00:22:26,388 [marching band playing] 432 00:22:48,584 --> 00:22:51,195 -You mean that's it? 433 00:22:51,239 --> 00:22:53,459 -I expect you've seen pictures of the New Scotland Yard, 434 00:22:53,502 --> 00:22:54,547 Lieutenant. 435 00:22:54,590 --> 00:22:56,113 -Well, that looks pretty new to me. 436 00:22:56,157 --> 00:22:58,855 -Yeah, the New Scotland Yard was the old headquarters. 437 00:22:58,899 --> 00:23:00,509 But it wasn't Old Scotland Yard. 438 00:23:00,553 --> 00:23:01,684 No, no, no. 439 00:23:01,728 --> 00:23:02,642 It was New Scotland Yard, but erm-- 440 00:23:02,685 --> 00:23:03,599 -O'Keefe. 441 00:23:03,643 --> 00:23:04,687 -I'm gonna take a picture. 442 00:23:04,731 --> 00:23:06,167 -Where the devil have you been? 443 00:23:06,210 --> 00:23:07,429 That plane got in two hours ago. 444 00:23:07,473 --> 00:23:08,038 Didn't you meet it? 445 00:23:08,082 --> 00:23:09,431 -I'm sorry, sir. 446 00:23:09,475 --> 00:23:10,432 I didn't realize there was a hurry on. 447 00:23:10,476 --> 00:23:11,607 He's never been here before. 448 00:23:11,651 --> 00:23:13,043 I suppose things do look a bit different. 449 00:23:13,087 --> 00:23:15,742 They were changing the guard at Buckingham Palace. 450 00:23:15,785 --> 00:23:18,832 Fortunately, his camera wasn't in his suitcase. 451 00:23:18,875 --> 00:23:20,137 Yeah, he's lost it. 452 00:23:20,181 --> 00:23:22,444 Uh, his suitcase, I mean. 453 00:23:22,488 --> 00:23:24,533 Yeah, there was a bit of a mix-up at London Airport. 454 00:23:27,057 --> 00:23:29,190 -What, you mean-- 455 00:23:29,233 --> 00:23:30,844 I say. 456 00:23:30,887 --> 00:23:32,889 -Uh, Lieutenant. 457 00:23:32,933 --> 00:23:34,891 Lieutenant. 458 00:23:34,935 --> 00:23:38,721 Uh, this is, uh, Detective Chief Superintendent Durk. 459 00:23:38,765 --> 00:23:40,027 Lieutenant Columbo. 460 00:23:40,070 --> 00:23:41,550 -Lieutenant. 461 00:23:41,594 --> 00:23:43,030 -Detective Chief Superintendent Durk, this is a 462 00:23:43,073 --> 00:23:44,074 great honor. 463 00:23:44,118 --> 00:23:45,728 -Durk will do. 464 00:23:45,772 --> 00:23:48,165 -He's to be your host on this inspection visit, sir. 465 00:23:48,209 --> 00:23:49,950 -Well, I certainly don't wanna get in your hair, sir. 466 00:23:49,993 --> 00:23:51,473 -Nonsense. 467 00:23:51,517 --> 00:23:52,256 I'm the one that's messing up your schedule. 468 00:23:52,300 --> 00:23:53,997 -Beg pardon? 469 00:23:54,041 --> 00:23:55,956 -We were supposed to visit the new police academy at Reading 470 00:23:55,999 --> 00:23:58,480 today, but I'm afraid my wife called and we're going to have 471 00:23:58,524 --> 00:23:59,220 to make a little detour. 472 00:23:59,263 --> 00:24:00,656 I hope you don't mind. 473 00:24:00,700 --> 00:24:02,005 -My wife always calls about some errand 474 00:24:02,049 --> 00:24:03,267 at the grocery store. 475 00:24:03,311 --> 00:24:04,530 -Bit different this time. 476 00:24:04,573 --> 00:24:07,141 Death in the family. 477 00:24:07,184 --> 00:24:08,534 We'll use my car. 478 00:25:23,609 --> 00:25:25,959 -Sure must be a big family. 479 00:25:26,002 --> 00:25:27,787 [clicks tongue] 480 00:25:27,830 --> 00:25:28,962 SUPT. 481 00:25:29,005 --> 00:25:29,876 DURK [OFFSCREEN]: Yeah, the old duffer 482 00:25:29,919 --> 00:25:30,964 lived alone, actually. 483 00:25:31,007 --> 00:25:32,487 My wife's uncle, twice removed. 484 00:25:32,531 --> 00:25:33,619 Actually, I saw very little of the fellow. 485 00:25:33,662 --> 00:25:36,622 Come on. 486 00:25:36,665 --> 00:25:38,928 [doorbell rings] 487 00:25:42,410 --> 00:25:43,803 -This is just a duty call. 488 00:25:43,846 --> 00:25:45,979 I'll leave my card and then we can be moving along. 489 00:25:46,022 --> 00:25:48,068 I thought you might like to look around one 490 00:25:48,111 --> 00:25:49,112 of these old places. 491 00:25:49,156 --> 00:25:51,724 -Oh, er, Mr. Durk, sir? 492 00:25:51,767 --> 00:25:52,681 -Yes. 493 00:25:52,725 --> 00:25:53,987 Are you the local constable? 494 00:25:54,030 --> 00:25:56,467 -Featheringham, sir. 495 00:25:56,511 --> 00:25:59,166 And my accident report's is already filed. 496 00:25:59,209 --> 00:26:02,952 But Mr. Tanner, he was properly disturbed finding the 497 00:26:02,996 --> 00:26:07,435 master expired, and before breakfast and all. 498 00:26:07,478 --> 00:26:10,656 So I stayed around to help see to the removal of the remains. 499 00:26:10,699 --> 00:26:13,920 Er, just took His Lordship off, they did, to have him 500 00:26:13,963 --> 00:26:15,443 properly coffined. 501 00:26:15,486 --> 00:26:19,186 For public mourning, considering his station. 502 00:26:19,229 --> 00:26:20,622 -What is he saying? 503 00:26:20,666 --> 00:26:21,884 -His Lordship died. 504 00:26:21,928 --> 00:26:24,757 Uh, some sort of accident. 505 00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:26,106 -What happened? 506 00:26:26,149 --> 00:26:28,064 -Well, I really don't know. 507 00:26:28,108 --> 00:26:31,198 -You think you could ask? 508 00:26:31,241 --> 00:26:33,548 -Could you fill us in, Constable? 509 00:26:33,592 --> 00:26:37,073 -Oh, er, took a fall down the staircase, he did. 510 00:26:37,117 --> 00:26:39,859 Landed just there, fully clad. 511 00:26:39,902 --> 00:26:43,036 Just have happened before midnight, the doctor though, 512 00:26:43,079 --> 00:26:44,907 what with the rigor mortis. 513 00:26:44,951 --> 00:26:47,954 But we added it all up quite neatly. 514 00:26:47,997 --> 00:26:50,565 Sir Roger was reading in the upstairs sitting room, you 515 00:26:50,609 --> 00:26:52,523 see, and he started to come down. 516 00:26:52,567 --> 00:26:54,569 MAID [OFFSCREEN]: Here we are, Charlie dear. 517 00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:56,484 In times of trial, I always say there's nothing like-- 518 00:26:56,527 --> 00:26:58,007 -[POINTEDLY] Ahem-hem. 519 00:26:58,051 --> 00:26:59,226 -Cold beer. 520 00:26:59,269 --> 00:27:00,662 -Ahem. 521 00:27:00,706 --> 00:27:02,664 Yes, well, I'll just have a word with 522 00:27:02,708 --> 00:27:04,013 the servants, Columbo. 523 00:27:04,057 --> 00:27:06,146 Look around as much as you like. 524 00:27:06,189 --> 00:27:07,887 Quite an old showplace, really. 525 00:28:06,728 --> 00:28:08,687 [no audible ringing] 526 00:28:46,942 --> 00:28:47,987 -Excuse me. 527 00:28:48,030 --> 00:28:50,685 -Irish whiskey before luncheon? 528 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:52,905 I would have thought perhaps with a glass of sherry, a nice 529 00:28:52,948 --> 00:28:55,298 Amontillado, would be more appropriate. 530 00:28:55,342 --> 00:28:56,256 -Oh, no, sir, no. 531 00:28:56,299 --> 00:28:57,692 Thank you very much. 532 00:28:57,736 --> 00:28:58,737 I really wasn't looking for a drink, no. 533 00:28:58,780 --> 00:28:59,825 I was, uh-- 534 00:28:59,868 --> 00:29:02,088 I was just wondering, uh-- 535 00:29:02,131 --> 00:29:05,787 I wonder, could you tell me, do you know whether or not 536 00:29:05,831 --> 00:29:09,965 Mister, uh, the gentleman, Sir Haversham, was that the chair 537 00:29:10,009 --> 00:29:11,706 that he was reading in last night? 538 00:29:11,750 --> 00:29:13,621 -Well, as a matter of fact, that was Sir Roger's chair 539 00:29:13,664 --> 00:29:15,101 when he wanted to read, yes. 540 00:29:15,144 --> 00:29:16,232 -Oh, I see. 541 00:29:16,276 --> 00:29:17,712 Terrible thing, wasn't it? 542 00:29:17,756 --> 00:29:18,800 -Yes, very shocking. 543 00:29:18,844 --> 00:29:20,062 Thank you very much. 544 00:29:20,106 --> 00:29:21,020 -Why do you suppose he started downstairs? 545 00:29:21,063 --> 00:29:22,195 -No idea. 546 00:29:22,238 --> 00:29:22,804 -Oh. 547 00:29:22,848 --> 00:29:24,023 Hm. 548 00:29:24,066 --> 00:29:25,198 Couldn't have been to get any liquor. 549 00:29:25,241 --> 00:29:26,939 Certainly plenty of stuff up here. 550 00:29:26,982 --> 00:29:29,245 -Well, sir, it's not for me to question my master's wishes. 551 00:29:29,289 --> 00:29:30,812 As a matter of fact, he sometimes preferred to have a 552 00:29:30,856 --> 00:29:34,816 cup of cocoa as a nightcap, from the kitchen. 553 00:29:34,860 --> 00:29:35,991 -You work here? 554 00:29:36,035 --> 00:29:37,210 -Indeed, I do. 555 00:29:37,253 --> 00:29:40,735 I've been here for many happy years. 556 00:29:40,779 --> 00:29:42,215 -I thought you were a friend of the family. 557 00:29:42,258 --> 00:29:43,259 -Heh, heh. 558 00:29:43,303 --> 00:29:44,957 Thank you very much. 559 00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:46,872 And you, I take it, are the gentleman who rang the bell 560 00:29:46,915 --> 00:29:47,742 just now? 561 00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:48,961 -Oh, that works? 562 00:29:49,004 --> 00:29:50,223 TANNER [OFFSCREEN]: Indeed, it does. 563 00:29:50,266 --> 00:29:53,748 -Gee, I thought that was just decoration. 564 00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:54,880 Boy, that's funny, isn't it? 565 00:29:54,923 --> 00:29:56,011 TANNER [OFFSCREEN]: What's funny? 566 00:29:56,055 --> 00:29:57,970 -No, I was just wondering, if-- 567 00:29:58,013 --> 00:30:00,363 if he wanted something last night, why he didn't just ring 568 00:30:00,407 --> 00:30:02,104 for it? 569 00:30:02,148 --> 00:30:04,237 -Well, if I may say so, unlike many masters, Sir Roger was 570 00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:06,761 very considerate to his staff. 571 00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:08,415 Perhaps you'll be good enough to excuse me. 572 00:30:08,458 --> 00:30:09,242 -Oh, certainly, sir. 573 00:30:09,285 --> 00:30:10,286 I'm sorry. 574 00:30:10,330 --> 00:30:11,679 I didn't mean to hold you up. 575 00:30:11,722 --> 00:30:13,115 I just get curious about these things. 576 00:30:13,159 --> 00:30:14,987 I guess nobody heard anything when he fell downstairs? 577 00:30:15,030 --> 00:30:16,684 -Well, that's understandable. 578 00:30:16,727 --> 00:30:18,904 You see, Cook's quarters are in the south wing, and the 579 00:30:18,947 --> 00:30:20,296 maids also sleep there. 580 00:30:20,340 --> 00:30:22,255 I live in the old cottage. 581 00:30:22,298 --> 00:30:25,084 It so happens that Sir Rogers dismissed us early last night, 582 00:30:25,127 --> 00:30:26,912 I should say no later than 7 o'clock. 583 00:30:26,955 --> 00:30:29,262 -What I was wondering, if that's-- 584 00:30:29,305 --> 00:30:30,002 -Ah. 585 00:30:30,045 --> 00:30:31,830 -Ah, Arthur. 586 00:30:31,873 --> 00:30:34,267 -Tanner's been the butler here for over 20 years, Columbo. 587 00:30:34,310 --> 00:30:37,183 Uh, the lieutenant's here from Los Angeles for a few days. 588 00:30:37,226 --> 00:30:39,315 He's observing our latest techniques at the Yard. 589 00:30:39,359 --> 00:30:40,882 -How interesting. 590 00:30:40,926 --> 00:30:43,145 Let's hope some of it rubs off, as they say. 591 00:30:43,189 --> 00:30:44,103 -Oh, thank you very much. 592 00:30:44,146 --> 00:30:45,800 I certainly hope so. 593 00:30:45,844 --> 00:30:48,194 Well, listen, now if you're the butler, then maybe, uh-- 594 00:30:48,237 --> 00:30:50,936 you know, this is not too important. 595 00:30:50,979 --> 00:30:53,068 But with your permission, it's just that I noticed that 596 00:30:53,112 --> 00:30:55,375 somebody said that Sir Roger was fully dressed. 597 00:30:55,418 --> 00:30:57,943 And I was wondering, I guess they meant by that that he was 598 00:30:57,986 --> 00:30:59,422 wearing, like, a smoking jacket? 599 00:30:59,466 --> 00:31:02,208 -Actually, Sir Roger was wearing a grey Harris tweed 600 00:31:02,251 --> 00:31:03,818 suit with a blue tie. 601 00:31:03,862 --> 00:31:05,124 -While he was reading? 602 00:31:05,167 --> 00:31:07,953 [CHUCKLING] Isn't that something? 603 00:31:07,996 --> 00:31:09,824 You know, I can't even stand a necktie. 604 00:31:09,868 --> 00:31:14,046 -Sir Roger, if I may say so, was rather particular. 605 00:31:14,089 --> 00:31:15,438 -Quite. 606 00:31:15,482 --> 00:31:16,962 Well, uh, shall we be getting along, Columbo? 607 00:31:17,005 --> 00:31:17,963 -Oh, yes, certainly, sir. 608 00:31:18,006 --> 00:31:19,225 Oh, uh, sir. 609 00:31:19,268 --> 00:31:22,837 Uh, you know, I couldn't help noticing, um-- 610 00:31:22,881 --> 00:31:26,101 do you have a moment? 611 00:31:26,145 --> 00:31:27,320 [clears throat] 612 00:31:31,324 --> 00:31:33,413 Now, I couldn't help noticing that a man with such an 613 00:31:33,456 --> 00:31:35,328 impressive library, isn't it funny what 614 00:31:35,371 --> 00:31:37,156 he did to that book? 615 00:31:37,199 --> 00:31:38,374 -What? 616 00:31:42,204 --> 00:31:44,772 -I mean, if this was the book that Sir Roger was reading 617 00:31:44,815 --> 00:31:45,904 last night. 618 00:31:45,947 --> 00:31:47,209 -I'm afraid I don't follow you. 619 00:31:47,253 --> 00:31:49,124 -This is a valuable book, isn't it? 620 00:31:49,168 --> 00:31:50,909 -"Alice in Wonderland," first edition? 621 00:31:50,952 --> 00:31:52,171 I, uh-- 622 00:31:52,214 --> 00:31:54,913 I imagine it's worth a few thousand, yes. 623 00:31:54,956 --> 00:31:57,132 -You see, back home, we call this the spine of the book, 624 00:31:57,176 --> 00:31:59,482 and you know you can break that thing by putting it down 625 00:31:59,526 --> 00:32:01,049 upside down like that? 626 00:32:01,093 --> 00:32:04,748 Of course, I never knew that until I did it to my 627 00:32:04,792 --> 00:32:05,967 mother-in-law's cookbook. 628 00:32:06,011 --> 00:32:07,882 She almost hit me with a frying pan. 629 00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:10,450 -Well, perhaps he was in a hurry, or perhaps something 630 00:32:10,493 --> 00:32:11,233 startled him. 631 00:32:11,277 --> 00:32:12,887 -Yes, sir. 632 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:14,019 You know, maybe that's why he started downstairs. 633 00:32:14,062 --> 00:32:15,498 Maybe he heard something. 634 00:32:15,542 --> 00:32:17,109 He was an older fellow, wasn't he? 635 00:32:17,152 --> 00:32:18,327 -Yes. 636 00:32:20,068 --> 00:32:22,984 -Just looking for his reading glasses, because I didn't 637 00:32:23,028 --> 00:32:24,159 notice any around. 638 00:32:27,423 --> 00:32:31,036 Would you mind asking the gentleman? 639 00:32:31,079 --> 00:32:34,387 -Tanner, Mr. Columbo would like to know the whereabouts 640 00:32:34,430 --> 00:32:36,041 of Sir Roger's glasses. 641 00:32:36,084 --> 00:32:37,259 -If you don't mind, sir. 642 00:32:37,303 --> 00:32:38,957 -No, not at all. 643 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:41,220 Actually, it was Sir Roger's custom when not actually 644 00:32:41,263 --> 00:32:44,484 reading to keep his spectacles in his breast pocket, and if 645 00:32:44,527 --> 00:32:47,791 you must know, that's where they still are. 646 00:32:47,835 --> 00:32:50,316 -Oh, they must have got smashed up pretty badly after 647 00:32:50,359 --> 00:32:52,100 he fell down all those stairs. 648 00:32:52,144 --> 00:32:55,408 -Oh, well, we didn't actually waste time looking for broken 649 00:32:55,451 --> 00:32:58,019 glass under such tragic circumstances. 650 00:32:58,063 --> 00:33:02,850 Besides, we'd noticed nothing unusual or abnormal. 651 00:33:02,893 --> 00:33:04,025 -No, no, no, just a-- 652 00:33:04,069 --> 00:33:05,418 just a simple accident. 653 00:33:05,461 --> 00:33:06,419 Well, thank you, Tanner. 654 00:33:06,462 --> 00:33:07,072 TANNER [OFFSCREEN]: Thank you. 655 00:33:07,115 --> 00:33:08,638 SUPT. 656 00:33:08,682 --> 00:33:09,509 DURK [OFFSCREEN]: And once again, my, uh, my sympathies. 657 00:33:09,552 --> 00:33:10,466 -Thank you, Mr. Durk. 658 00:33:10,510 --> 00:33:11,076 -Constable. 659 00:33:11,119 --> 00:33:12,338 -Sir? 660 00:33:12,381 --> 00:33:13,426 -I just had a thought. 661 00:33:13,469 --> 00:33:14,296 You-- 662 00:33:14,340 --> 00:33:15,384 [interposing voices] 663 00:33:15,428 --> 00:33:17,343 -Lovely chatting with you. 664 00:33:17,386 --> 00:33:19,084 -Yes, sir. 665 00:33:19,127 --> 00:33:20,476 -Going to tell my wife that I met a real English butler. 666 00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:22,261 She's going to get a terrific kick out of that. 667 00:33:22,304 --> 00:33:23,262 -You flatter me. 668 00:33:23,305 --> 00:33:24,263 Thank you. 669 00:33:24,306 --> 00:33:25,090 Goodbye. 670 00:33:25,133 --> 00:33:26,221 -After you, Columbo. 671 00:34:20,493 --> 00:34:30,503 [sobs loudly] 672 00:34:30,546 --> 00:34:37,814 [sobs loudly] 673 00:34:37,858 --> 00:34:38,815 -Please. 674 00:34:38,859 --> 00:34:39,642 Please, gentlemen, not now. 675 00:34:42,123 --> 00:34:42,776 -I'm-- 676 00:34:42,819 --> 00:34:43,907 I'm sorry. 677 00:34:43,951 --> 00:34:46,519 -Hold it just like that, Mr. Frame. 678 00:34:46,562 --> 00:34:47,955 Thank you, sir. 679 00:34:47,998 --> 00:34:50,653 -No, no, no, we don't want that sort of thing. 680 00:34:50,697 --> 00:34:52,002 Lily, pull yourself together, huh? 681 00:34:52,046 --> 00:34:53,091 -[sobbing loudly] 682 00:34:53,134 --> 00:34:56,137 -Let's get you out of here. 683 00:34:56,181 --> 00:34:59,445 Out of the lights. 684 00:34:59,488 --> 00:35:01,011 Poor Lillian. 685 00:35:01,055 --> 00:35:04,058 Just like a favorite daughter to Sir Roger. 686 00:35:04,102 --> 00:35:05,494 -A daughter, Mr. Frame? 687 00:35:05,538 --> 00:35:07,017 Not much older than you, was he? 688 00:35:07,061 --> 00:35:08,976 -Whose idea is this little bash? 689 00:35:09,019 --> 00:35:12,675 -This "little bash" is a dream, gentlemen, Sir Roger's 690 00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:15,678 own dream, which he confided to me on several occasions. 691 00:35:15,722 --> 00:35:20,770 When I'm dead, he told me, I'd like one last chance to say 692 00:35:20,814 --> 00:35:23,991 goodbye to all those beautiful actors and musicians-- 693 00:35:24,034 --> 00:35:27,777 now, there, there, there, Miss Dudley, stiff upper-- 694 00:35:27,821 --> 00:35:28,996 lip. 695 00:35:29,039 --> 00:35:30,737 -And what about "Macbeth," Mr. Frame? 696 00:35:30,780 --> 00:35:32,869 Somebody says you're still opening tonight. 697 00:35:32,913 --> 00:35:35,872 -Well, yes, but-- but for his sake, not for ours. 698 00:35:35,916 --> 00:35:38,614 Oh, if we didn't go on, Sir Roger would 699 00:35:38,658 --> 00:35:40,007 roll over in his grave. 700 00:35:40,050 --> 00:35:42,879 Spectaculum procedere debet, he always said. 701 00:35:42,923 --> 00:35:44,838 The show must go on. 702 00:35:44,881 --> 00:35:47,406 -Doesn't hurt advance ticket sales either, I suppose. 703 00:35:47,449 --> 00:35:48,711 -Swine. 704 00:35:48,755 --> 00:35:50,974 -Uh, be right back, darling. 705 00:35:51,018 --> 00:36:01,028 [weeping loudly] 706 00:36:01,071 --> 00:36:10,777 [weeping loudly] 707 00:36:10,820 --> 00:36:14,084 -Ma'am, it's a lucky thing I packed a spare in my pocket 708 00:36:14,128 --> 00:36:15,999 instead of my suitcase. 709 00:36:16,043 --> 00:36:16,913 -Thank you. 710 00:36:16,957 --> 00:36:18,915 -It got lost somewhere. 711 00:36:18,959 --> 00:36:20,134 -You're American. 712 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:20,961 -LA. 713 00:36:21,004 --> 00:36:21,744 Got in yesterday. 714 00:36:21,788 --> 00:36:23,572 707, 11 hours. 715 00:36:23,616 --> 00:36:26,096 -At least you're not a photographer. 716 00:36:26,140 --> 00:36:27,750 My makeup must look dreadful. 717 00:36:30,275 --> 00:36:33,147 -Actually, I did bring a camera, and I wanted to take a 718 00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,931 picture of you, but not now. 719 00:36:34,975 --> 00:36:35,758 Wrong time. 720 00:36:35,802 --> 00:36:37,020 You can keep that. 721 00:36:37,064 --> 00:36:38,761 -Thank you. 722 00:36:38,805 --> 00:36:40,676 -Guess you must have been as close to Sir Roger lately as 723 00:36:40,720 --> 00:36:42,461 anybody in the whole world. 724 00:36:42,504 --> 00:36:44,463 -He was our dearest friend. 725 00:36:44,506 --> 00:36:46,943 Sir Roger was mostly retired, you know, until this last few 726 00:36:46,987 --> 00:36:51,121 months, when he persuaded us to do this lavish production. 727 00:36:51,165 --> 00:36:54,081 What he'd always wanted to do. 728 00:36:54,124 --> 00:36:55,735 Now he won't even be able to see it. 729 00:37:01,958 --> 00:37:03,960 -Terrible time to ask, but how could I get tickets? 730 00:37:04,004 --> 00:37:06,267 I'd love to see the show tonight. 731 00:37:06,311 --> 00:37:07,137 -Well, I-- 732 00:37:07,181 --> 00:37:08,269 I think I could-- 733 00:37:08,313 --> 00:37:09,618 well-- 734 00:37:09,662 --> 00:37:11,185 can't your newspaper arrange it? 735 00:37:11,229 --> 00:37:12,795 You are a reporter? 736 00:37:12,839 --> 00:37:14,144 -Oh, no, ma'am, no. 737 00:37:14,188 --> 00:37:15,972 Oh, no, I'm terribly sorry. 738 00:37:16,016 --> 00:37:17,800 No, my name is Columbo. 739 00:37:17,844 --> 00:37:18,975 I'm just a visiting fireman. 740 00:37:19,019 --> 00:37:20,150 -Fireman? 741 00:37:20,194 --> 00:37:21,151 -Well, that's just an expression. 742 00:37:21,195 --> 00:37:21,935 I'm a policeman. 743 00:37:21,978 --> 00:37:22,849 -Police? 744 00:37:22,892 --> 00:37:24,285 -Yeah. 745 00:37:24,329 --> 00:37:25,591 See, I'm just tagging along with that fellow over there. 746 00:37:28,202 --> 00:37:29,638 Mr. Durk. 747 00:37:29,682 --> 00:37:33,990 Detective Chief Superintendent, Scotland Yard. 748 00:37:34,034 --> 00:37:36,166 He's showing me around London. 749 00:37:36,210 --> 00:37:37,994 -Ah, Lieutenant, can we go now? 750 00:37:38,038 --> 00:37:39,300 -Oh, yes, certainly. 751 00:37:39,344 --> 00:37:39,996 -Let's see if we can get out this way, shall we? 752 00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:40,867 -Yes. 753 00:37:40,910 --> 00:37:42,608 Uh, excuse me, man. 754 00:37:42,651 --> 00:37:44,958 Wonderful talking with someone as famous as you, and I hope 755 00:37:45,001 --> 00:37:47,047 I've been able to make you feel a little better. 756 00:37:47,090 --> 00:37:48,004 -Yes. 757 00:37:48,048 --> 00:37:49,919 [sniffles] 758 00:37:52,879 --> 00:37:54,837 -I, uh I had a word with the funeral chaps. 759 00:37:54,881 --> 00:37:57,840 They're bringing the body about 2 o'clock, no fuss. 760 00:37:57,884 --> 00:38:00,756 -Listen, that was a great idea that you had about checking up 761 00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:02,236 on those glasses. 762 00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:04,630 I mean, if he fell the way down that staircase with his 763 00:38:04,673 --> 00:38:08,198 glasses in his pocket and they weren't even cracked-- 764 00:38:08,242 --> 00:38:10,766 -Actually, I, uh, I rather had it on my mind to request a 765 00:38:10,810 --> 00:38:11,680 postmortem. 766 00:38:11,724 --> 00:38:12,681 -Post what? 767 00:38:12,725 --> 00:38:14,161 -Autopsy. 768 00:38:14,204 --> 00:38:16,076 Well, one never knows with these little, uh, accidents. 769 00:38:16,119 --> 00:38:17,773 -You can never be too sure. 770 00:38:17,817 --> 00:38:19,253 -In the meantime, you might like to take a look at our 771 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:20,167 ballistics laboratories. 772 00:38:20,210 --> 00:38:21,603 Quite the latest thing. 773 00:38:21,647 --> 00:38:22,169 COLUMBO [OFFSCREEN]: Wonderful, wonderful. 774 00:38:29,916 --> 00:38:31,047 -Autopsy? 775 00:38:31,091 --> 00:38:32,353 -And Detective Chief Superintendent. 776 00:38:32,397 --> 00:38:34,834 That means the murder squad, doesn't it? 777 00:38:34,877 --> 00:38:35,835 -Oh, I'm not sure. 778 00:38:35,878 --> 00:38:37,227 -But why aren't you sure? 779 00:38:37,271 --> 00:38:38,925 Oh, Nicky, they'll find something. 780 00:38:38,968 --> 00:38:41,667 -No, no, no, no, not here, they won't. 781 00:38:41,710 --> 00:38:44,365 This trunk is-- is absolutely clean. 782 00:38:44,409 --> 00:38:47,107 And we've washed the cold cream jar that-- that you hit 783 00:38:47,150 --> 00:38:47,890 him with. 784 00:38:47,934 --> 00:38:49,196 -I hit him with? 785 00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:50,110 If you hadn't moved. 786 00:38:50,153 --> 00:38:52,373 -Now, now, wait-- 787 00:38:52,417 --> 00:38:55,724 nobody knows that Roger was in the theater last night. 788 00:38:55,768 --> 00:38:57,030 Nobody even knows he left home. 789 00:38:57,073 --> 00:38:59,162 -How do you know that? 790 00:38:59,206 --> 00:39:01,861 He knew already about us when he came here last night. 791 00:39:01,904 --> 00:39:05,081 He must have been talking to someone. 792 00:39:05,125 --> 00:39:08,041 And I bet I know who. 793 00:39:08,084 --> 00:39:10,217 That nasty little Miss Dudley. 794 00:39:10,260 --> 00:39:11,087 -Oh, that child? 795 00:39:11,131 --> 00:39:13,002 Don't be absurd. 796 00:39:13,046 --> 00:39:15,701 Besides, I can handle Miss Dudley. 797 00:39:15,744 --> 00:39:19,269 -You try that, just once, and I'll have your guts for 798 00:39:19,313 --> 00:39:20,096 garters. 799 00:39:20,140 --> 00:39:21,750 -Oh, Lily, please. 800 00:39:21,794 --> 00:39:23,926 -Nicky darling, won't an autopsy give a clue as to what 801 00:39:23,970 --> 00:39:26,233 we did with Roger's body after he was dead? 802 00:39:26,276 --> 00:39:27,103 -Well, I'm not sure. 803 00:39:27,147 --> 00:39:28,104 I really don't know. 804 00:39:28,148 --> 00:39:29,758 -Well, why don't you know? 805 00:39:29,802 --> 00:39:32,413 If you'd taken that part in the Agatha Christie play like 806 00:39:32,457 --> 00:39:34,633 I told you to, you would know these things. 807 00:39:34,676 --> 00:39:36,330 -You know perfectly well why I didn't take that rubbish. 808 00:39:41,683 --> 00:39:43,990 Ha! 809 00:39:44,033 --> 00:39:45,252 -What, "ha"? 810 00:39:51,780 --> 00:39:54,870 -False face must hide what the false heart doth know. 811 00:39:54,914 --> 00:39:56,045 -Huh? 812 00:40:01,311 --> 00:40:05,272 [horns honking] 813 00:40:05,315 --> 00:40:07,796 [music playing] 814 00:40:56,410 --> 00:40:58,368 -Ah, Mr. Durk, sir. 815 00:40:58,412 --> 00:41:00,196 Spot of tea this afternoon? 816 00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:02,111 -My guest is rather hungry, George. 817 00:41:02,155 --> 00:41:04,070 I've been hauling him about sightseeing. 818 00:41:04,113 --> 00:41:05,898 I'm afraid he hasn't had much time to eat. 819 00:41:05,941 --> 00:41:07,900 -Would you care to sit here? 820 00:41:16,517 --> 00:41:19,172 -When you said club, I thought you meant a country club or a 821 00:41:19,215 --> 00:41:19,825 health club. 822 00:41:19,868 --> 00:41:20,826 -Hm. 823 00:41:20,869 --> 00:41:22,001 Bit stuffy, I'm afraid. 824 00:41:22,044 --> 00:41:24,003 Hasn't changed since Father's day. 825 00:41:24,046 --> 00:41:26,832 -My father was an Elk once, until my mother stopped him. 826 00:41:29,443 --> 00:41:30,879 -Ah, here we are. 827 00:41:30,923 --> 00:41:33,926 Pitch in. 828 00:41:33,969 --> 00:41:35,318 -That's for us? 829 00:41:35,362 --> 00:41:35,884 -Yes. 830 00:41:35,928 --> 00:41:37,407 -Oh. 831 00:41:37,451 --> 00:41:39,497 -When you said tea, I was afraid we were going to get 832 00:41:39,540 --> 00:41:41,107 nothing but those tiny sandwiches. 833 00:41:41,150 --> 00:41:42,543 This is terrific. 834 00:41:42,587 --> 00:41:46,242 -Why do you think we keep the ladies out, sir? 835 00:41:46,286 --> 00:41:47,896 -Diver, what are you doing here? 836 00:41:47,940 --> 00:41:50,072 -Oh, I left my assistant to finish up the job. 837 00:41:50,116 --> 00:41:52,901 -This is Lieutenant Columbo, Los Angeles Police. 838 00:41:52,945 --> 00:41:54,207 -Really? 839 00:41:54,250 --> 00:41:56,252 Now there's a place with opportunity. 840 00:41:56,296 --> 00:41:59,081 Well, 20 times the business I get here. 841 00:41:59,125 --> 00:42:00,343 -Beg pardon? 842 00:42:00,387 --> 00:42:01,997 STEWARD [OFFSCREEN]: Liverwurst, sir? 843 00:42:02,041 --> 00:42:02,911 -Yes. 844 00:42:02,955 --> 00:42:03,564 -Go on. 845 00:42:03,608 --> 00:42:04,217 Go on, gentlemen. 846 00:42:04,260 --> 00:42:05,261 I-- 847 00:42:05,305 --> 00:42:06,306 I'll just talk while you eat. 848 00:42:06,349 --> 00:42:07,873 -Er, Diver is our pathologist. 849 00:42:07,916 --> 00:42:09,091 -Oh. 850 00:42:10,919 --> 00:42:13,052 Waiter, chop. 851 00:42:13,095 --> 00:42:15,184 -Postmortem lividity, Mr. Durk. 852 00:42:15,228 --> 00:42:16,925 There it was all over him. 853 00:42:16,969 --> 00:42:19,972 There was your answer before I even made the first slice. 854 00:42:20,015 --> 00:42:22,148 -Oh, you're the autopsy surgeon? 855 00:42:22,191 --> 00:42:26,152 -Stilton cheese is particularly nice today, sir. 856 00:42:26,195 --> 00:42:27,936 -Fine, thank you. 857 00:42:27,980 --> 00:42:29,851 -As if you didn't know more about postmortems than I do, 858 00:42:29,895 --> 00:42:30,548 Lieutenant. 859 00:42:30,591 --> 00:42:32,288 All the opportunity. 860 00:42:32,332 --> 00:42:33,942 Here, erm, these photos are still wet. 861 00:42:33,986 --> 00:42:36,466 But just notice those purplish spots on the left thigh, 862 00:42:36,510 --> 00:42:37,119 there. 863 00:42:37,163 --> 00:42:39,078 -Oh, yes. 864 00:42:39,121 --> 00:42:39,948 -Uh, do start. 865 00:42:39,992 --> 00:42:41,123 Don't wait for us. 866 00:42:41,167 --> 00:42:42,211 Get to the point, Diver. 867 00:42:42,255 --> 00:42:43,517 You mean the body was moved? 868 00:42:43,561 --> 00:42:44,910 -Oh, yes. 869 00:42:44,953 --> 00:42:47,477 Some little time after death, I'd say. 870 00:42:47,521 --> 00:42:49,479 -What time did he die? 871 00:42:49,523 --> 00:42:50,829 -The abdomen, too. 872 00:42:50,872 --> 00:42:52,482 Notice there, where the blood's settled? 873 00:42:52,526 --> 00:42:54,920 Oh, anywhere from early evening to midnight. 874 00:42:54,963 --> 00:42:58,532 I've brought the, erm, fluid samples. 875 00:42:58,576 --> 00:43:00,882 I don't think they'll tell us much more. 876 00:43:00,926 --> 00:43:04,364 -Then Sir Roger did not die by falling down a staircase. 877 00:43:04,407 --> 00:43:05,844 -Oh, no. 878 00:43:05,887 --> 00:43:07,019 No, he died somewhere else, and then he was 879 00:43:07,062 --> 00:43:08,020 moved there later on. 880 00:43:08,063 --> 00:43:09,282 Mm. 881 00:43:09,325 --> 00:43:10,370 There are several bruises, almost as if 882 00:43:10,413 --> 00:43:12,067 he'd been in a fight. 883 00:43:12,111 --> 00:43:14,896 And a blow to the occipital region, causing that brain 884 00:43:14,940 --> 00:43:17,072 hemorrhage there. 885 00:43:17,116 --> 00:43:18,987 You agree, Lieutenant? 886 00:43:19,031 --> 00:43:23,513 -Uh, oh, yes, it's murder all right. 887 00:43:23,557 --> 00:43:24,297 -Extraordinary. 888 00:43:24,340 --> 00:43:25,341 -Mm. 889 00:43:25,385 --> 00:43:26,516 -Thank you. 890 00:43:51,019 --> 00:43:53,239 -Yoo-hoo, Tanner. 891 00:43:53,282 --> 00:43:54,675 Go on, go on. 892 00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:58,897 -Well, this is a surprise. 893 00:43:58,940 --> 00:44:01,377 I must say I didn't expect to see you here at this hour, 894 00:44:01,421 --> 00:44:03,684 with your opening and everything tonight. 895 00:44:03,728 --> 00:44:06,078 -This must be dreadful for you, Tanner. 896 00:44:06,121 --> 00:44:07,688 -Thank you, Miss, and for you, too. 897 00:44:07,732 --> 00:44:09,037 -For all of us. 898 00:44:12,432 --> 00:44:14,652 Uh, Tanner, I didn't want to bring this up at this time, 899 00:44:14,695 --> 00:44:16,218 but something's been bothering me. 900 00:44:16,262 --> 00:44:18,656 My Sir Henry Irving, remember? 901 00:44:18,699 --> 00:44:20,353 -Irving, sir? 902 00:44:20,396 --> 00:44:21,702 -Yes, the other day, out on the terrace, I was showing it 903 00:44:21,746 --> 00:44:25,358 to Sir Roger, Irving's own copy of "Macbeth." 904 00:44:25,401 --> 00:44:27,055 -Of course. 905 00:44:27,099 --> 00:44:29,536 -Yes, well, I left it here for Roger to have a look at. 906 00:44:29,579 --> 00:44:31,146 -Mm, I didn't realize. 907 00:44:31,190 --> 00:44:33,540 And you needed it before your performance tonight. 908 00:44:33,583 --> 00:44:34,497 -Scarcely. 909 00:44:34,541 --> 00:44:36,282 I do know my lines. 910 00:44:36,325 --> 00:44:39,589 But that old book had Irving's own comments on every page. 911 00:44:39,633 --> 00:44:42,592 And I got to thinking, when someone dies, there's always 912 00:44:42,636 --> 00:44:44,290 all that legal nonsense. 913 00:44:44,333 --> 00:44:48,250 You know, inventories, and sealing things up, and since 914 00:44:48,294 --> 00:44:50,992 it is just about the most valuable thing I own-- 915 00:44:51,036 --> 00:44:52,428 -I quite understand, sir. 916 00:44:52,472 --> 00:44:54,561 We won't let those stupid tax people even see it. 917 00:44:54,604 --> 00:44:57,433 I'll slip it to you myself, and mum's the word. 918 00:44:57,477 --> 00:45:00,480 -I'd, erm, I'd rather not go in, darling, if you don't 919 00:45:00,523 --> 00:45:01,394 mind. 920 00:45:01,437 --> 00:45:02,612 -Yes, I understand. 921 00:45:02,656 --> 00:45:03,962 Shan't be a moment. 922 00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:56,014 -That actor fellow, Frame. 923 00:45:56,057 --> 00:45:57,276 That's odd. 924 00:45:57,319 --> 00:46:00,279 I thought he had a play opening. 925 00:46:00,322 --> 00:46:02,672 Hey, better stop that. 926 00:46:02,716 --> 00:46:05,110 [clattering] 927 00:46:05,153 --> 00:46:06,415 -You better leave that. 928 00:46:06,459 --> 00:46:08,069 We don't want anything touched for a while. 929 00:46:08,113 --> 00:46:10,158 Scotland Yard. 930 00:46:10,202 --> 00:46:11,464 -Sir Roger's, huh? 931 00:46:11,507 --> 00:46:13,031 -That's right. 932 00:46:13,074 --> 00:46:14,467 -Sure pretty. 933 00:46:14,510 --> 00:46:17,513 Well, Mr. Tanner says wash 'em, I'll wash 'em. 934 00:46:17,557 --> 00:46:20,647 -Well, it's not very dirty anyhow. 935 00:46:20,690 --> 00:46:24,216 Few spots, that's all. 936 00:46:24,259 --> 00:46:28,133 Say, did you wash this car yesterday? 937 00:46:28,176 --> 00:46:29,482 -I wash it every day. 938 00:46:29,525 --> 00:46:31,527 You'd think it was his own blooming chariot. 939 00:46:39,797 --> 00:46:41,581 -Murdered? 940 00:46:41,624 --> 00:46:43,539 Oh, god, I-- 941 00:46:43,583 --> 00:46:45,454 I can't believe it. 942 00:46:45,498 --> 00:46:48,762 -Yes, well, you see, the autopsy showed the, uh-- but 943 00:46:48,806 --> 00:46:50,808 we won't go into those little details. 944 00:46:50,851 --> 00:46:51,852 -No luck, darling. 945 00:46:51,896 --> 00:46:53,375 Wasn't in the downstairs library. 946 00:46:53,419 --> 00:46:54,550 Wasn't anywhere-- 947 00:46:54,594 --> 00:46:57,379 -Nick, this is Superintendent Durk. 948 00:46:57,423 --> 00:47:00,600 He says someone murdered poor dear Roger. 949 00:47:00,643 --> 00:47:01,862 -Good-- 950 00:47:01,906 --> 00:47:03,211 good heavens. 951 00:47:05,474 --> 00:47:07,215 We'd no idea. 952 00:47:07,259 --> 00:47:08,564 TANNER [OFFSCREEN]: Mr. Frame? 953 00:47:08,608 --> 00:47:09,739 -Yes, Tanner. 954 00:47:13,787 --> 00:47:14,657 Here. 955 00:47:14,701 --> 00:47:16,224 -It's not upstairs, sir. 956 00:47:16,268 --> 00:47:18,748 I've looked everywhere, even in Sir Roger's safe. 957 00:47:18,792 --> 00:47:21,229 -What is this you're all looking for? 958 00:47:21,273 --> 00:47:21,708 -Oh, nothing. 959 00:47:21,751 --> 00:47:23,231 A book. 960 00:47:23,275 --> 00:47:23,928 We were out for a drive, stopped by, that's all. 961 00:47:23,971 --> 00:47:24,754 It's not important. 962 00:47:24,798 --> 00:47:25,799 -Tanner, Mr. Durk-- 963 00:47:25,843 --> 00:47:27,496 -Now just one moment. 964 00:47:27,540 --> 00:47:30,325 The Yard will decide what's important here. 965 00:47:30,369 --> 00:47:31,413 A book, you say? 966 00:47:31,457 --> 00:47:33,241 What sort of book? 967 00:47:33,285 --> 00:47:35,722 -Well, it was a nice little volume. 968 00:47:35,765 --> 00:47:37,680 I lent it to Roger one day last week. 969 00:47:37,724 --> 00:47:40,727 Sir Henry Irving's own copy of "Macbeth." Had his own notes, 970 00:47:40,770 --> 00:47:41,902 scribbled on every page. 971 00:47:41,946 --> 00:47:43,251 -Really? 972 00:47:43,295 --> 00:47:44,731 And now you say you can't find it? 973 00:47:44,774 --> 00:47:45,601 -No. 974 00:47:45,645 --> 00:47:47,429 Searched everywhere. 975 00:47:47,473 --> 00:47:49,170 -Have you indeed? 976 00:47:49,214 --> 00:47:51,216 -Did you hear that, Columbo? 977 00:47:51,259 --> 00:47:52,434 -Yes, sir, I did. 978 00:47:52,478 --> 00:47:53,479 I was just wondering, who is Irving? 979 00:47:53,522 --> 00:47:54,349 -Heh, heh. 980 00:47:54,393 --> 00:47:55,916 Excuse me, sir. 981 00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:58,876 Sir Henry Irving, perhaps the greatest English actor who 982 00:47:58,919 --> 00:48:00,442 ever lived. 983 00:48:00,486 --> 00:48:03,315 -Well, one of them, let's say. 984 00:48:03,358 --> 00:48:06,318 But I do suppose that little copy of "Macbeth" must be 985 00:48:06,361 --> 00:48:09,625 worth all of 20,000 or 30,000 by now. 986 00:48:09,669 --> 00:48:11,758 -Did you hear that, Columbo? 987 00:48:11,801 --> 00:48:12,628 -But then, never mind. 988 00:48:12,672 --> 00:48:14,369 I'm sure it'll turn up. 989 00:48:14,413 --> 00:48:17,807 We have an 8 o'clock curtain, so, uh, please, call us if 990 00:48:17,851 --> 00:48:20,419 there's anything we could do, Mr. Durk. 991 00:48:20,462 --> 00:48:22,900 -My dear fellow, you already have. 992 00:48:22,943 --> 00:48:24,292 You already have. 993 00:48:28,862 --> 00:48:30,820 Well, simple deduction, I suppose. 994 00:48:30,864 --> 00:48:33,301 Suppose there were a thief in the house. 995 00:48:33,345 --> 00:48:35,695 Suppose that's what's Sir Roger heard, came down to 996 00:48:35,738 --> 00:48:37,175 investigate. 997 00:48:37,218 --> 00:48:38,916 -Would you excuse me for just one moment, sir? 998 00:48:38,959 --> 00:48:41,831 Mr. Tanner? 999 00:48:41,875 --> 00:48:43,572 -Yes, sir? 1000 00:48:43,616 --> 00:48:46,227 -Mr. Tanner, sir, could you tell me, was there any sort of 1001 00:48:46,271 --> 00:48:47,663 rain out here last night? 1002 00:48:47,707 --> 00:48:48,926 -Rain, sir? 1003 00:48:48,969 --> 00:48:51,667 No, we haven't had a drop all the week. 1004 00:48:51,711 --> 00:48:52,842 -Excuse me. 1005 00:48:57,630 --> 00:48:59,632 I say, you won't forget, will you? 1006 00:48:59,675 --> 00:49:00,328 -What? 1007 00:49:00,372 --> 00:49:01,590 -My ticket? 1008 00:49:01,634 --> 00:49:02,983 You won't forget my ticket for tonight? 1009 00:49:03,027 --> 00:49:04,463 -No, I'll leave it at the box office in my name. 1010 00:49:15,691 --> 00:49:17,693 [both laugh] 1011 00:49:17,737 --> 00:49:19,217 -Hook, line, and sinker. 1012 00:49:19,260 --> 00:49:21,262 [both laugh] 1013 00:49:36,408 --> 00:49:46,418 [attendees chatting] 1014 00:49:46,461 --> 00:49:56,471 [attendees chatting] 1015 00:49:56,515 --> 00:50:05,176 [attendees chatting] 1016 00:50:05,219 --> 00:50:07,787 -Lily, you divine little devil, 1017 00:50:07,830 --> 00:50:09,006 you were simply marvelous. 1018 00:50:09,049 --> 00:50:10,050 -Thank you. 1019 00:50:10,094 --> 00:50:11,312 -Lily, astounding. 1020 00:50:11,356 --> 00:50:12,183 Absolutely astounding. 1021 00:50:12,226 --> 00:50:13,314 -Oh, you are sweet. 1022 00:50:13,358 --> 00:50:15,925 -If only Roger could have seen it. 1023 00:50:15,969 --> 00:50:18,232 -Yes. 1024 00:50:18,276 --> 00:50:19,190 Ooh! 1025 00:50:19,233 --> 00:50:19,929 -Oh, sorry. 1026 00:50:19,973 --> 00:50:21,279 -Oh, it's you. 1027 00:50:21,322 --> 00:50:24,064 -I think I stepped on something and broke it. 1028 00:50:24,108 --> 00:50:26,371 Oh, no. 1029 00:50:26,414 --> 00:50:28,155 Oh! 1030 00:50:28,199 --> 00:50:31,463 I think this is somebody's necklace. 1031 00:50:31,506 --> 00:50:33,030 -[LAUGHING] Mine, silly. 1032 00:50:33,073 --> 00:50:35,249 I thought I'd found all the beads last night. 1033 00:50:35,293 --> 00:50:37,121 It was like this. 1034 00:50:37,164 --> 00:50:39,427 My wardrobe mistress made me another one this morning. 1035 00:50:39,471 --> 00:50:41,125 -Lillian. 1036 00:50:41,168 --> 00:50:41,951 -Oh, darling. 1037 00:50:41,995 --> 00:50:43,127 -Gorgeous thing. 1038 00:50:43,170 --> 00:50:45,259 Oh, you were fantastic, just fantastic. 1039 00:50:45,303 --> 00:50:46,434 -Oh, you are sweet. 1040 00:50:46,478 --> 00:50:47,261 -Excuse me, sir, just one moment. 1041 00:50:47,305 --> 00:50:48,175 -Sarah Bernhardt. 1042 00:50:48,219 --> 00:50:49,959 Our own divine Sarah. 1043 00:50:50,003 --> 00:50:51,439 -In other words, I want to-- this is just a little thing 1044 00:50:51,483 --> 00:50:52,919 that you broke last night during that little fight that 1045 00:50:52,962 --> 00:50:53,485 you had? 1046 00:50:53,528 --> 00:50:54,573 -That's right. 1047 00:50:54,616 --> 00:50:55,443 Oh, darling, did you really like it? 1048 00:50:55,487 --> 00:50:57,184 -You were incredible. 1049 00:50:57,228 --> 00:50:57,619 Of course I'm too young to have seen Sarah Bernhardt, but 1050 00:50:57,663 --> 00:50:58,316 I-- 1051 00:50:58,359 --> 00:50:59,273 -Excuse me. 1052 00:50:59,317 --> 00:51:00,100 -What did you say, darling? 1053 00:51:00,144 --> 00:51:01,841 I didn't quite-- 1054 00:51:01,884 --> 00:51:02,711 -Listen, before I forget, let me thank you for the tickets. 1055 00:51:02,755 --> 00:51:04,191 I have never been so shook. 1056 00:51:04,235 --> 00:51:06,019 I saw "Hamlet," but that was back in high school. 1057 00:51:06,063 --> 00:51:07,586 I mean, tonight when you stood there with that bloody dagger 1058 00:51:07,629 --> 00:51:09,196 in your hand, it was thrilling, wasn't it? 1059 00:51:09,240 --> 00:51:10,415 -Yes. 1060 00:51:10,458 --> 00:51:11,459 -Oh come on, you've had her long enough. 1061 00:51:11,503 --> 00:51:12,982 -Oh, yes, ma'am. 1062 00:51:13,026 --> 00:51:16,116 -Lily, love, what insight, what depth. 1063 00:51:16,160 --> 00:51:16,986 Oh! 1064 00:51:17,030 --> 00:51:18,205 You were delicious! 1065 00:51:18,249 --> 00:51:20,077 -Oh, darling, you are sweet. 1066 00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:20,990 -Come to the party. 1067 00:51:21,034 --> 00:51:22,122 -Yes, I will. 1068 00:51:22,166 --> 00:51:23,471 -Yes, yes, come tomorrow night. 1069 00:51:30,217 --> 00:51:31,305 -Ah, there you are. 1070 00:51:31,349 --> 00:51:34,613 Oh, so you liked it, huh? 1071 00:51:34,656 --> 00:51:36,919 -Better than any movie I've ever seen in my whole life. 1072 00:51:36,963 --> 00:51:39,226 I don't know what that fellow Irving had, but believe me, 1073 00:51:39,270 --> 00:51:40,314 the way you took that part-- 1074 00:51:40,358 --> 00:51:41,489 -Oh, thanks so much. 1075 00:51:41,533 --> 00:51:42,316 Oh, thanks. 1076 00:51:42,360 --> 00:51:43,143 -I'll never forget it. 1077 00:51:43,187 --> 00:51:43,665 I was thrilled. 1078 00:51:43,709 --> 00:51:44,623 Brilliant. 1079 00:51:44,666 --> 00:51:45,667 -Bravo, Nick, Just bravo. 1080 00:51:45,711 --> 00:51:47,930 -Thanks for coming, thanks. 1081 00:51:47,974 --> 00:51:50,542 Oh, oh, oh, they haven't found that little book of mine, have 1082 00:51:50,585 --> 00:51:51,543 they? 1083 00:51:51,586 --> 00:51:53,022 -I don't think so, sir, no. 1084 00:51:53,066 --> 00:51:53,762 -Oh, you were simply marvelous tonight. 1085 00:51:53,806 --> 00:51:55,329 -Oh, thank you, love. 1086 00:51:55,373 --> 00:51:57,288 Good of you to come back. 1087 00:51:57,331 --> 00:51:58,898 -They seem to think there was a robber in 1088 00:51:58,941 --> 00:52:01,074 the house, I guess. 1089 00:52:01,118 --> 00:52:02,380 -Good lord. 1090 00:52:02,423 --> 00:52:03,163 Oh, oh. 1091 00:52:03,207 --> 00:52:03,903 Oh. 1092 00:52:03,946 --> 00:52:05,339 Thanks. 1093 00:52:05,383 --> 00:52:07,211 Uh, well, that would explain things, wouldn't it? 1094 00:52:07,254 --> 00:52:09,038 I-- 1095 00:52:09,082 --> 00:52:11,040 I mean, uh, if old Sir Roger caught him in the act, then-- 1096 00:52:11,084 --> 00:52:12,477 -No, sir, I don't think so, sir. 1097 00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:14,305 -Nicky, darling, you were simply marvelous. 1098 00:52:14,348 --> 00:52:15,654 -Thank you, my love. 1099 00:52:15,697 --> 00:52:19,048 Thank you. 1100 00:52:19,092 --> 00:52:20,049 You don't think so? 1101 00:52:20,093 --> 00:52:21,616 -No, no, I don't think so. 1102 00:52:21,660 --> 00:52:24,358 Because if he had killed Sir Roger and then moved the body 1103 00:52:24,402 --> 00:52:26,360 in order to make it look like an accident, I mean with all 1104 00:52:26,404 --> 00:52:28,057 those beautiful things around, why would he 1105 00:52:28,101 --> 00:52:29,102 just take one book? 1106 00:52:29,146 --> 00:52:30,016 Would you? 1107 00:52:30,059 --> 00:52:31,060 -Right on, Nicky Frame. 1108 00:52:31,104 --> 00:52:33,106 All hail Macbeth. 1109 00:52:33,150 --> 00:52:34,455 -Hah, hah! 1110 00:52:34,499 --> 00:52:35,456 -Magnificent. 1111 00:52:35,500 --> 00:52:37,066 -[laughs] 1112 00:52:37,110 --> 00:52:38,503 Good to see you. 1113 00:52:38,546 --> 00:52:39,721 -Good to see you. 1114 00:52:39,765 --> 00:52:43,290 -Look, we-- we've got to have a drink. 1115 00:52:43,334 --> 00:52:44,509 -Thank you, dear. 1116 00:52:44,552 --> 00:52:45,553 Thank you. 1117 00:52:45,597 --> 00:52:47,076 We did try, for Roger's sake. 1118 00:52:50,602 --> 00:52:51,733 This needs a damn good brush, Mary. 1119 00:52:51,777 --> 00:52:56,085 It's been trampled to death. 1120 00:52:56,129 --> 00:52:58,305 Oh, here you are again, Lieutenant. 1121 00:52:58,349 --> 00:53:01,395 What little snoop told you there was a fight in here? 1122 00:53:01,439 --> 00:53:03,223 Was she perhaps blonde? 1123 00:53:03,267 --> 00:53:05,443 -Oh, no, just some guy in overalls out there happened to 1124 00:53:05,486 --> 00:53:06,444 mention it. 1125 00:53:06,487 --> 00:53:08,228 -Oh, Nick and I always fight. 1126 00:53:08,272 --> 00:53:09,490 -Ma'am, I didn't mean to pry. 1127 00:53:09,534 --> 00:53:11,100 See, I was just asking about the rain-- 1128 00:53:11,144 --> 00:53:12,493 -Lily, get your clothes off. 1129 00:53:12,537 --> 00:53:15,192 It's time to celebrate. 1130 00:53:15,235 --> 00:53:16,018 -Rain? 1131 00:53:16,062 --> 00:53:17,542 -Spots on the hood? 1132 00:53:17,585 --> 00:53:19,283 Huh? 1133 00:53:19,326 --> 00:53:21,415 Oh, the bonnet. 1134 00:53:21,459 --> 00:53:23,722 -Well, anyway, on this car, and it hasn't rained out there 1135 00:53:23,765 --> 00:53:25,376 for over a week. 1136 00:53:25,419 --> 00:53:27,291 -Ah, you think that Roger might have driven somewhere 1137 00:53:27,334 --> 00:53:28,509 else last night. 1138 00:53:28,553 --> 00:53:30,163 No, no, no, no, no. 1139 00:53:30,207 --> 00:53:32,165 No, look, Tanner would have noticed his leaving. 1140 00:53:32,209 --> 00:53:35,386 -Mr. Tanner says not, sir, so I got to wondering. 1141 00:53:35,429 --> 00:53:38,432 Well, anyway, of course, from what I hear, uh, your wife 1142 00:53:38,476 --> 00:53:40,608 might know Sir Roger better than you do, sir. 1143 00:53:40,652 --> 00:53:42,131 But at any rate, um-- 1144 00:53:42,175 --> 00:53:43,437 -Come along, Nick darling, we're having a 1145 00:53:43,481 --> 00:53:46,701 simply smashing party. 1146 00:53:46,745 --> 00:53:48,486 -Yes, go on. 1147 00:53:48,529 --> 00:53:51,619 -No, I was just going to say that the, uh, the paper does 1148 00:53:51,663 --> 00:53:55,797 say that it sprinkled here in London a little last night. 1149 00:53:55,841 --> 00:53:57,712 -Uh-huh. 1150 00:53:57,756 --> 00:53:59,061 -But it must have rained in lots of 1151 00:53:59,105 --> 00:54:00,715 places, don't you think? 1152 00:54:00,759 --> 00:54:05,154 -That's exactly what Mr. Frame said, only I got to thinking. 1153 00:54:05,198 --> 00:54:07,722 Since you and Sir Roger were so close, well, maybe he just 1154 00:54:07,766 --> 00:54:09,768 might have come here to wish you luck in private or 1155 00:54:09,811 --> 00:54:10,638 something like that. 1156 00:54:10,682 --> 00:54:12,292 -But he didn't. 1157 00:54:12,336 --> 00:54:14,555 I don't know what your man in the overalls told you. 1158 00:54:14,599 --> 00:54:16,296 -Oh, nobody saw. 1159 00:54:16,340 --> 00:54:18,255 Of course, I haven't asked the stage doorman yet. 1160 00:54:18,298 --> 00:54:20,257 I can't seem to find him. 1161 00:54:20,300 --> 00:54:23,738 -Lieutenant, the last time I saw Sir Roger Haversham was 1162 00:54:23,782 --> 00:54:25,479 the day before yesterday. 1163 00:54:25,523 --> 00:54:28,047 -It was at the Dorchester for lunch. 1164 00:54:28,090 --> 00:54:32,181 Roger, Lily and I were discussing plans for an 1165 00:54:32,225 --> 00:54:35,184 American production of "Macbeth." 1166 00:54:35,228 --> 00:54:37,665 -That's if the critics like us, of course. 1167 00:54:37,709 --> 00:54:40,668 And after lunch, Nick and I came back here for rehearsal. 1168 00:54:40,712 --> 00:54:43,497 And Roger never interfered on those days. 1169 00:54:43,541 --> 00:54:46,370 But as for that childish little fight last night-- 1170 00:54:46,413 --> 00:54:47,849 -Lily struck me. 1171 00:54:47,893 --> 00:54:49,808 -Well, he was making fatherly eyes at one of the 1172 00:54:49,851 --> 00:54:51,462 understudies. 1173 00:54:51,505 --> 00:54:52,637 -Lily is paranoid. 1174 00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:54,203 So I struck her back. 1175 00:54:54,247 --> 00:54:55,640 -In a not very nice place. 1176 00:54:55,683 --> 00:54:58,338 -She landed against this wall over here. 1177 00:54:58,382 --> 00:54:59,208 [chuckles] 1178 00:54:59,252 --> 00:55:00,732 Clumsy thing. 1179 00:55:00,775 --> 00:55:03,691 -So I picked up my bloody dagger, and I went at him-- 1180 00:55:03,735 --> 00:55:07,521 [both laughing] 1181 00:55:07,565 --> 00:55:09,218 -Oh, gosh, I'm sorry. 1182 00:55:09,262 --> 00:55:10,524 I didn't realize it was so late. 1183 00:55:10,568 --> 00:55:12,700 Didn't mean to stay so long. 1184 00:55:12,744 --> 00:55:15,224 -Oh, yes you did, Columbo. 1185 00:55:15,268 --> 00:55:17,444 You heard some silly gossip, I suppose, about Sir 1186 00:55:17,488 --> 00:55:19,098 Roger and my wife. 1187 00:55:19,141 --> 00:55:23,363 Yes, some vulgar American notion of a love triangle. 1188 00:55:23,407 --> 00:55:24,843 -No, sir, not at all. 1189 00:55:24,886 --> 00:55:28,107 -Yes, some nasty idea that poor old Roger must have been 1190 00:55:28,150 --> 00:55:31,545 lured into town last night by Macbeth himself, perhaps. 1191 00:55:31,589 --> 00:55:33,895 Play as rather suggestive of murder, I suppose, to 1192 00:55:33,939 --> 00:55:36,115 impressionable minds. 1193 00:55:36,158 --> 00:55:37,725 Lily, too bad he didn't come visiting at Christmas. 1194 00:55:37,769 --> 00:55:39,379 You could have got him tickets to the children's pantomime. 1195 00:55:39,423 --> 00:55:40,511 -Nicky, stop it. 1196 00:55:40,554 --> 00:55:41,816 -I'm terribly sorry, sir. 1197 00:55:41,860 --> 00:55:43,557 Believe me, I guess I did get carried 1198 00:55:43,601 --> 00:55:44,558 away by those questions. 1199 00:55:44,602 --> 00:55:46,343 But you see, I just-- 1200 00:55:46,386 --> 00:55:49,563 I just have never seen anything like you. 1201 00:55:49,607 --> 00:55:52,827 Like that performance you both just gave. 1202 00:55:52,871 --> 00:55:54,133 -Thank you. 1203 00:55:54,176 --> 00:55:57,223 I didn't mean to be nasty, old boy. 1204 00:55:57,266 --> 00:55:59,399 No hard feelings. 1205 00:55:59,443 --> 00:56:00,487 -And you both must be exhausted. 1206 00:56:00,531 --> 00:56:02,141 I don't know how you do it. 1207 00:56:02,184 --> 00:56:04,796 -With innocent, loving hearts. 1208 00:56:04,839 --> 00:56:06,450 Good night, Lieutenant. 1209 00:56:06,493 --> 00:56:12,194 -Well, whatever it is, it sure must be most unusual. 1210 00:56:12,238 --> 00:56:15,372 Uh, the reason I say that is because you know, when my wife 1211 00:56:15,415 --> 00:56:17,591 and I try to remember what happened yesterday or the day 1212 00:56:17,635 --> 00:56:19,419 before, well, we don't agree on anything. 1213 00:56:19,463 --> 00:56:23,292 And you two, you not only agree, you use almost the 1214 00:56:23,336 --> 00:56:27,427 exact same words to tell about it. 1215 00:56:27,471 --> 00:56:28,602 Good night. 1216 00:56:28,646 --> 00:56:29,777 -Good night. 1217 00:56:33,999 --> 00:56:36,654 -After that performance we just gave. 1218 00:56:36,697 --> 00:56:37,916 Of all the nerve. 1219 00:56:42,660 --> 00:56:44,270 JOE [OFFSCREEN]: Hold it, hold it! 1220 00:56:44,313 --> 00:56:45,967 We can't have a leading lady opening her own door. 1221 00:56:46,011 --> 00:56:49,623 Oh, I just stepped out for a moment, sir, to get a little 1222 00:56:49,667 --> 00:56:51,625 sniff of the fresh air. 1223 00:56:51,669 --> 00:56:53,627 Oh, and I never heard such glorious remarks about an 1224 00:56:53,671 --> 00:56:55,324 opening night, sir. 1225 00:56:55,368 --> 00:56:56,456 Oh, and you too, Miss Stanhope. 1226 00:56:56,500 --> 00:56:58,806 You were an angel in the part. 1227 00:56:58,850 --> 00:57:01,461 If I heard it a thousand times, I heard it once. 1228 00:57:01,505 --> 00:57:03,811 The queen herself will be buying tickets. 1229 00:57:03,855 --> 00:57:07,685 Here-- ooh, oh, these doors, how they do go on. 1230 00:57:07,728 --> 00:57:08,381 Well, in you get. 1231 00:57:08,425 --> 00:57:09,643 Oh-- 1232 00:57:09,687 --> 00:57:12,646 oh, sir, that's most especially gracious. 1233 00:57:12,690 --> 00:57:13,647 Thank you. 1234 00:57:13,691 --> 00:57:15,475 And you was marvelous, too. 1235 00:57:15,519 --> 00:57:18,260 That dagger and the blood and all, and holding up your hand 1236 00:57:18,304 --> 00:57:20,785 like a carnation and making the audience gasp. 1237 00:57:20,828 --> 00:57:22,482 Well, thank you both so much. 1238 00:57:22,526 --> 00:57:23,483 Good night, sir. 1239 00:57:23,527 --> 00:57:24,397 Good night, Miss Stanhope. 1240 00:57:24,441 --> 00:57:25,529 Good night. 1241 00:57:30,621 --> 00:57:34,755 -Where did he get that umbrella? 1242 00:57:34,799 --> 00:57:36,540 -Hm? 1243 00:57:36,583 --> 00:57:38,759 -A little engraving around the handle, just 1244 00:57:38,803 --> 00:57:40,674 like the one that-- 1245 00:57:40,718 --> 00:57:44,678 don't you remember, Roger told us that Lady Astor had given 1246 00:57:44,722 --> 00:57:46,767 him this engraved umbre-- 1247 00:57:50,554 --> 00:57:51,990 you took the umbrella last night. 1248 00:57:52,033 --> 00:57:53,687 -Yes, of course. 1249 00:57:53,731 --> 00:57:56,429 I put it in Roger's closet with his coat and hat, just 1250 00:57:56,473 --> 00:57:57,865 where it belonged. 1251 00:57:57,909 --> 00:57:59,388 -You sure you got the right one? 1252 00:57:59,432 --> 00:58:00,999 -Oh, Nick, yes, of course. 1253 00:58:01,042 --> 00:58:02,740 It was the only one there. 1254 00:58:02,783 --> 00:58:05,003 Umbrella, I mean, in my dressing room. 1255 00:58:05,046 --> 00:58:10,530 Except-- well, Joe did pick up some of own things earlier. 1256 00:58:10,574 --> 00:58:11,749 Oh, no! 1257 00:58:15,753 --> 00:58:16,884 -Oh. 1258 00:58:54,922 --> 00:58:57,795 -Hey, watch it, mate. 1259 00:58:57,838 --> 00:58:59,361 Why, Mr. Frame. 1260 00:58:59,405 --> 00:59:00,362 What a delight! 1261 00:59:00,406 --> 00:59:01,320 What are you-- 1262 00:59:01,363 --> 00:59:02,582 I thought you'd gone home. 1263 00:59:02,626 --> 00:59:04,062 -I couldn't get away from the curb, Joe. 1264 00:59:04,105 --> 00:59:05,672 -Oh. 1265 00:59:05,716 --> 00:59:08,414 -Some of Lily's country cousins came by, stopped us. 1266 00:59:08,457 --> 00:59:09,981 Dear me, they've been talking forever. 1267 00:59:10,024 --> 00:59:14,594 -So you drop in for a pint of wallop, eh? 1268 00:59:14,638 --> 00:59:15,987 -Oh, what are you having? 1269 00:59:16,030 --> 00:59:17,379 -Well, it was bitter. 1270 00:59:17,423 --> 00:59:18,903 -I'm dying of thirst. 1271 00:59:18,946 --> 00:59:21,383 Uh, Bess, give us two of the same and put it on my card, 1272 00:59:21,427 --> 00:59:22,123 will you, love? 1273 00:59:22,167 --> 00:59:23,647 -Yes, sir, Mrs. Frame. 1274 00:59:23,690 --> 00:59:25,431 -Why, that's extremely gracious of you, Mr. Frame. 1275 00:59:25,474 --> 00:59:26,127 Thank you. 1276 00:59:26,171 --> 00:59:27,128 Thank you very much. 1277 00:59:27,172 --> 00:59:30,610 Very nice. 1278 00:59:30,654 --> 00:59:34,353 -Oh, you know, that things rather dangerous. 1279 00:59:34,396 --> 00:59:35,963 You're going to stab somebody with that, eh? 1280 00:59:36,007 --> 00:59:37,486 Oh, no, no. 1281 00:59:37,530 --> 00:59:38,966 -Let me put it in the stand over here. 1282 00:59:39,010 --> 00:59:40,402 -No, I'm-- 1283 00:59:40,446 --> 00:59:40,881 I'm very careful with it, Mr. Frame. 1284 00:59:40,925 --> 00:59:41,534 Thank you. 1285 00:59:41,578 --> 00:59:44,537 -Oh. 1286 00:59:44,581 --> 00:59:45,669 Cheers, Joe. 1287 00:59:56,810 --> 00:59:57,811 -A-ha! 1288 00:59:57,855 --> 00:59:59,378 Not so rusty after all, huh? 1289 00:59:59,421 --> 01:00:01,162 -No, Mr. Frame. 1290 01:00:01,206 --> 01:00:02,642 -What do you say, Joe? 1291 01:00:02,686 --> 01:00:04,122 A penny a point? 1292 01:00:04,165 --> 01:00:07,038 -Penny a point? 1293 01:00:07,081 --> 01:00:08,517 Oh. 1294 01:00:10,432 --> 01:00:15,568 Well, you know, my rheumatiz. 1295 01:00:15,612 --> 01:00:16,656 -Well, rheumatism, eh? 1296 01:00:16,700 --> 01:00:18,179 Let's make it tuppence? 1297 01:00:18,223 --> 01:00:21,618 -Tuppence a throw, sir? 1298 01:00:21,661 --> 01:00:24,142 Well, going to be high finance. 1299 01:00:39,157 --> 01:00:41,115 I'm a bit out of balance, sir. 1300 01:00:41,159 --> 01:00:42,682 -[chuckles] 1301 01:00:50,168 --> 01:00:52,126 [laughs] 1302 01:01:00,047 --> 01:01:02,659 -Well, that cleans me. 1303 01:01:02,702 --> 01:01:03,616 Here. 1304 01:01:03,660 --> 01:01:04,661 -Why, thank you, Mr. Frame. 1305 01:01:04,704 --> 01:01:05,705 Thank you very much. 1306 01:01:05,749 --> 01:01:06,663 -Well, that's it, Joe. 1307 01:01:06,706 --> 01:01:09,840 I've really got to-- 1308 01:01:09,883 --> 01:01:11,711 you're empty again. 1309 01:01:11,755 --> 01:01:12,886 -Oh, aye. 1310 01:01:16,107 --> 01:01:16,760 -Bess? 1311 01:01:16,803 --> 01:01:18,631 -Yes, Mr. Frame? 1312 01:01:18,675 --> 01:01:19,719 -Drinks all round, you hear me? 1313 01:01:19,763 --> 01:01:20,764 On me. 1314 01:01:20,807 --> 01:01:22,156 Drinks for the whole house. 1315 01:01:22,200 --> 01:01:24,724 -That's-- that's gracious of you, Mr. Frame. 1316 01:01:24,768 --> 01:01:25,943 Very gracious. 1317 01:02:07,071 --> 01:02:11,031 [starts engine] 1318 01:02:25,176 --> 01:02:26,786 -You have a minute, sir? 1319 01:02:26,830 --> 01:02:27,569 Excuse me. 1320 01:02:27,613 --> 01:02:28,135 -Don't touch me. 1321 01:02:28,179 --> 01:02:29,571 -Sorry. 1322 01:02:32,966 --> 01:02:33,662 Mr. Fenwick? 1323 01:02:33,706 --> 01:02:35,186 Stage doorman? 1324 01:02:35,229 --> 01:02:37,841 See, I was at the theater earlier, but I couldn't find 1325 01:02:37,884 --> 01:02:39,799 you around anyplace. 1326 01:02:39,843 --> 01:02:42,802 -I was there in my posted duty, as always. 1327 01:02:42,846 --> 01:02:44,891 -I wanted to ask you about yesterday, because you're the 1328 01:02:44,935 --> 01:02:46,850 only person who could have noticed anything yesterday. 1329 01:02:46,893 --> 01:02:48,242 My name is Columbo. 1330 01:02:48,286 --> 01:02:50,331 I know that doesn't mean anything around here. 1331 01:02:50,375 --> 01:02:52,159 I wish I could find my wallet. 1332 01:02:52,203 --> 01:02:54,683 I've got a friend over there at Scotland Yard, Mr. Durk, 1333 01:02:54,727 --> 01:02:56,294 he's chief of all the detectives there. 1334 01:02:56,337 --> 01:02:57,164 This is me, Columbo. 1335 01:02:57,208 --> 01:02:59,819 C-O-L-U-M-B-O. 1336 01:02:59,863 --> 01:03:00,820 -Police officer? 1337 01:03:00,864 --> 01:03:01,952 -Yes, sir. 1338 01:03:01,995 --> 01:03:03,170 -You want to ask me about yesterday? 1339 01:03:03,214 --> 01:03:03,910 -I do, sir, yes. 1340 01:03:03,954 --> 01:03:05,346 -Well, no. 1341 01:03:05,390 --> 01:03:06,565 Tomorrow. 1342 01:03:06,608 --> 01:03:07,914 And tomorrow and tomorrow. 1343 01:03:07,958 --> 01:03:09,568 -Did Mr. Haversham come to the theater yesterday? 1344 01:03:09,611 --> 01:03:12,005 Did he call or anything like that? 1345 01:03:12,049 --> 01:03:19,970 -If you happen to be referring to Sir Roger Haversham, for 20 1346 01:03:20,013 --> 01:03:23,712 years, I've been in his trusted employ, and never once 1347 01:03:23,756 --> 01:03:27,847 have I caught a glimpse of him on dress rehearsal day. 1348 01:03:27,891 --> 01:03:29,849 Oo, ee! 1349 01:03:29,893 --> 01:03:32,852 It's the shrapnel. 1350 01:03:32,896 --> 01:03:34,985 Sort of makes the trotters a bit wobbly. 1351 01:03:35,028 --> 01:03:36,725 -Are you sure about yesterday? 1352 01:03:36,769 --> 01:03:39,250 I know sometimes it's kind of hard to remember. 1353 01:03:39,293 --> 01:03:41,861 I mean, couldn't Sir Roger have maybe come to the 1354 01:03:41,905 --> 01:03:42,862 theater? 1355 01:03:42,906 --> 01:03:43,732 -Are you calling me a liar? 1356 01:03:43,776 --> 01:03:44,864 -No, sir. 1357 01:03:44,908 --> 01:03:46,126 -Saying I wasn't at my posted duty? 1358 01:03:46,170 --> 01:03:47,301 -No, sir. 1359 01:03:47,345 --> 01:03:49,042 -With Monty, I was, at El Alamein. 1360 01:03:49,086 --> 01:03:50,783 That's where I caught mine. 1361 01:03:50,827 --> 01:03:53,960 -Mr. Fenwick, could we maybe go to someplace more dry? 1362 01:03:54,004 --> 01:03:55,657 Someplace where we could sit and talk? 1363 01:03:55,701 --> 01:03:57,355 I mean, I don't have an umbrella either. 1364 01:03:57,398 --> 01:03:59,966 -You know some bleedin' josser nabbed it? 1365 01:04:00,010 --> 01:04:01,011 My brolly. 1366 01:04:01,054 --> 01:04:03,100 Right up there at the pub. 1367 01:04:03,143 --> 01:04:07,756 And you know, it's the young ones what does it. 1368 01:04:07,800 --> 01:04:10,150 The ones with the long hair. 1369 01:04:10,194 --> 01:04:15,329 As I was saying to Mr. Frame, there's no honor left in this 1370 01:04:15,373 --> 01:04:16,200 evil world. 1371 01:04:16,243 --> 01:04:17,201 -You were saying to who? 1372 01:04:17,244 --> 01:04:18,637 To Mister? 1373 01:04:18,680 --> 01:04:19,856 -Frame. 1374 01:04:19,899 --> 01:04:23,250 Mr. Nicholas Frame, the great actor. 1375 01:04:23,294 --> 01:04:26,819 Oh, a finer gentleman never breathed. 1376 01:04:26,863 --> 01:04:28,952 And you know, you know, he took the time to 1377 01:04:28,995 --> 01:04:30,431 buy a couple of pints. 1378 01:04:30,475 --> 01:04:31,780 He did. 1379 01:04:31,824 --> 01:04:33,347 And for all of them, too. 1380 01:04:33,391 --> 01:04:36,350 Right there in the public section. 1381 01:04:36,394 --> 01:04:40,093 -You mean Mr. Frame was just now in that same pub? 1382 01:04:40,137 --> 01:04:41,268 -Yes. 1383 01:05:19,002 --> 01:05:20,307 [doorbell rings] 1384 01:05:51,295 --> 01:05:53,340 -Miss Stanhope, Mr. Frame, come in. 1385 01:05:53,384 --> 01:05:55,342 -Tanner, I was afraid you'd gone off to bed. 1386 01:05:55,386 --> 01:05:57,779 -No, Mr. Durk thought it'd be better for me to stay in the 1387 01:05:57,823 --> 01:05:58,998 main house tonight. 1388 01:05:59,042 --> 01:06:00,086 -Oh, of course, of course. 1389 01:06:00,130 --> 01:06:01,740 We don't want any more robberies. 1390 01:06:01,783 --> 01:06:03,002 But you know, Tanner, I got to thinking. 1391 01:06:03,046 --> 01:06:05,048 We never looked in the sun room. 1392 01:06:05,091 --> 01:06:07,354 Roger was always putting things in that little mahogany 1393 01:06:07,398 --> 01:06:09,008 desk. 1394 01:06:09,052 --> 01:06:11,097 -Excuse me, sir, but Mr. Durk did say he didn't want 1395 01:06:11,141 --> 01:06:12,403 anything else touched. 1396 01:06:12,446 --> 01:06:14,187 -Oh, no, no, just have a look, that's all. 1397 01:06:14,231 --> 01:06:16,407 And if the Irving is there-- 1398 01:06:16,450 --> 01:06:18,061 be right back, darling. 1399 01:06:18,104 --> 01:06:20,063 -Well, now that you're here, for heaven's sakes, find it. 1400 01:06:50,441 --> 01:06:52,008 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: I'm sorry, Tanner. 1401 01:06:52,051 --> 01:06:53,270 I apologize. 1402 01:06:53,313 --> 01:06:55,881 I just had to know. 1403 01:06:55,924 --> 01:06:57,100 You were right, Lily. 1404 01:06:57,143 --> 01:06:58,231 Still no Irving. 1405 01:06:58,275 --> 01:07:00,059 -[laughs] 1406 01:07:00,103 --> 01:07:02,496 Isn't that typical of my brainy husband? 1407 01:07:02,540 --> 01:07:05,064 Driving all this way out here, all this distance-- 1408 01:07:05,108 --> 01:07:07,414 -Ha, ha, I'll crawl all the way back, hands and knees. 1409 01:07:07,458 --> 01:07:08,937 -I want a drink. 1410 01:07:08,981 --> 01:07:10,809 Tanner, do you suppose we could? 1411 01:07:10,852 --> 01:07:12,202 -Of course, madam. 1412 01:07:12,245 --> 01:07:13,072 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: No, it's too late. 1413 01:07:13,116 --> 01:07:14,421 Now come on, let's go. 1414 01:07:14,465 --> 01:07:16,423 -Nick, there's something I'd like to find here. 1415 01:07:16,467 --> 01:07:18,860 Something of Roger's that I always loved. 1416 01:07:18,904 --> 01:07:21,254 -I'm sorry, madam, but the police were rather explicit. 1417 01:07:21,298 --> 01:07:23,952 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: Oh, oh, hang the police It's 1418 01:07:23,996 --> 01:07:25,563 just that silly old tweed hat he always wore. 1419 01:07:25,606 --> 01:07:27,434 You know the one with the feather in it? 1420 01:07:27,478 --> 01:07:29,132 I'd love to have it. 1421 01:07:29,175 --> 01:07:32,918 Nick, it must be in a closet somewhere. 1422 01:07:32,961 --> 01:07:33,310 -Uh-- 1423 01:07:33,353 --> 01:07:34,398 [cough] 1424 01:07:34,441 --> 01:07:36,226 you want me to get it? 1425 01:07:36,269 --> 01:07:37,836 -Tanner, didn't he keep it in the closet? 1426 01:07:37,879 --> 01:07:39,968 TANNER [OFFSCREEN]: Yes, madam, it was kept in the-- 1427 01:07:40,012 --> 01:07:41,970 -It does seem a bit ghoulish, dear, but-- 1428 01:07:42,014 --> 01:07:43,885 -Yes, it's not there now, sir. 1429 01:07:43,929 --> 01:07:47,541 The Wax Museum picked it up this morning, along with his 1430 01:07:47,585 --> 01:07:49,065 cape and umbrella. 1431 01:07:49,108 --> 01:07:50,153 -Who? 1432 01:07:50,196 --> 01:07:51,980 -The Wax Museum. 1433 01:07:52,024 --> 01:07:53,982 They're using it, I'm told, in their new exhibit, alongside 1434 01:07:54,026 --> 01:07:56,985 your wax figures as Macbeth and Lady Macbeth. 1435 01:07:57,029 --> 01:07:59,336 I must say I thought it rather an honor for the late master 1436 01:07:59,379 --> 01:08:00,293 to be included. 1437 01:08:00,337 --> 01:08:01,512 -Oh, yes, yes, yes. 1438 01:08:01,555 --> 01:08:03,905 Well, Roger would be pleased. 1439 01:08:03,949 --> 01:08:06,299 -The Wax Museum? 1440 01:08:06,343 --> 01:08:09,259 The things some people will do to sell tickets. 1441 01:08:09,302 --> 01:08:11,478 And do you mean to say you let them walk out of here with-- 1442 01:08:11,522 --> 01:08:13,524 -Actually, madam, it was the downstairs 1443 01:08:13,567 --> 01:08:15,265 maid who saw the gentlemen. 1444 01:08:15,308 --> 01:08:19,007 This was before Mr. Durk came, of course. 1445 01:08:19,051 --> 01:08:21,967 But I must say, I really saw nothing wrong about it. 1446 01:08:22,010 --> 01:08:23,142 -Oh, of course. 1447 01:08:23,186 --> 01:08:25,144 We must all be willing to share his 1448 01:08:25,188 --> 01:08:27,190 memory with the public. 1449 01:08:27,233 --> 01:08:28,452 -Yes, I'm-- 1450 01:08:28,495 --> 01:08:29,409 I'm sorry, I-- 1451 01:08:29,453 --> 01:08:31,194 I'm being selfish. 1452 01:08:31,237 --> 01:08:35,067 I think it's just lovely that now the whole world will be 1453 01:08:35,111 --> 01:08:36,982 able to see everything. 1454 01:08:48,994 --> 01:08:52,693 [tires squealing] 1455 01:09:12,713 --> 01:09:14,237 [car door closes] 1456 01:09:21,244 --> 01:09:24,595 [doorbell rings] 1457 01:09:24,638 --> 01:09:27,598 [doorbell rings] 1458 01:09:27,641 --> 01:09:33,212 [knocking] 1459 01:09:46,443 --> 01:09:48,096 -Oh dear. 1460 01:09:48,140 --> 01:09:49,707 -Hi, Mr. Tanner. 1461 01:09:49,750 --> 01:09:52,536 Look, I'm sure sorry if I got you out of bed, but at least 1462 01:09:52,579 --> 01:09:53,754 it doesn't look like you were asleep. 1463 01:09:53,798 --> 01:09:55,147 Do you mind if I come in? 1464 01:09:55,191 --> 01:09:56,801 -Seems to me you are in. 1465 01:09:56,844 --> 01:09:58,759 -Yeah, well, look, it's just a little thing that I wanted to 1466 01:09:58,803 --> 01:09:59,673 ask you about. 1467 01:09:59,717 --> 01:10:01,022 It's unimportant. 1468 01:10:01,066 --> 01:10:02,763 But well, it's about an umbrella. 1469 01:10:02,807 --> 01:10:05,636 -An umbrella? 1470 01:10:05,679 --> 01:10:07,072 Come with me. 1471 01:10:42,063 --> 01:10:44,109 -Smells like the Roman catacombs. 1472 01:10:44,152 --> 01:10:44,762 -A storeroom, I think. 1473 01:10:44,805 --> 01:10:46,416 I was here before. 1474 01:10:46,459 --> 01:10:48,635 They keep all the things for each exhibit in a big box. 1475 01:10:48,679 --> 01:10:49,636 -Jolly. 1476 01:10:49,680 --> 01:10:51,377 Just like a treasure hunt. 1477 01:10:51,421 --> 01:10:53,423 -If we don't get old Roger's umbrella back where it belongs 1478 01:10:53,466 --> 01:10:54,467 and get Joe's out of here-- 1479 01:10:54,511 --> 01:10:55,686 -You don't have to rub it in. 1480 01:10:55,729 --> 01:10:57,165 It wasn't my fault. 1481 01:10:57,209 --> 01:10:57,731 [gasp] 1482 01:10:57,775 --> 01:11:00,212 Oh, Nicky, look. 1483 01:11:00,256 --> 01:11:02,258 Aren't they marvelous? 1484 01:11:02,301 --> 01:11:04,042 I've always wanted to be in a horror film. 1485 01:11:04,085 --> 01:11:05,478 -Well, you certainly qualify. 1486 01:11:05,522 --> 01:11:06,218 -Thanks. 1487 01:11:06,262 --> 01:11:07,045 -Oh! 1488 01:11:07,088 --> 01:11:08,220 Over here. 1489 01:11:11,397 --> 01:11:12,790 -[gasps] 1490 01:11:18,361 --> 01:11:19,492 -Sorry, Roger. 1491 01:11:51,916 --> 01:11:53,352 -Ah, here you are, sir. 1492 01:11:53,396 --> 01:11:55,354 Did Sergeant O'Keefe explain what this 1493 01:11:55,398 --> 01:11:56,877 American, erm, wanted? 1494 01:11:56,921 --> 01:11:57,704 -Yes, I got the message. 1495 01:11:57,748 --> 01:11:59,097 -Good. 1496 01:11:59,140 --> 01:11:59,837 Jones here is unlocking for us. 1497 01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:01,273 -Jones, you say? 1498 01:12:01,317 --> 01:12:03,362 Well, I hope we're not wasting his time. 1499 01:12:03,406 --> 01:12:07,845 -Uh, I just hope you don't think it's a 1500 01:12:07,888 --> 01:12:09,499 waste of time, sir. 1501 01:12:09,542 --> 01:12:11,414 Like I told your sergeant on the telephone, I know I 1502 01:12:11,457 --> 01:12:12,763 shouldn't be interfering like this-- 1503 01:12:12,806 --> 01:12:13,677 -Nonsense. 1504 01:12:13,720 --> 01:12:14,808 You're our guest here. 1505 01:12:14,852 --> 01:12:16,332 I invited you on the case myself. 1506 01:12:16,375 --> 01:12:18,551 We're, uh, we're most fortunate to have your 1507 01:12:18,595 --> 01:12:20,248 assistance. -Thank you. 1508 01:12:20,292 --> 01:12:21,380 Thank you very much, sir. 'Cause, you see, it's been 1509 01:12:21,424 --> 01:12:23,164 bothering me. 1510 01:12:23,208 --> 01:12:25,602 Whoever arranged that little scene on the staircase must 1511 01:12:25,645 --> 01:12:27,212 have known that house pretty well, and Sir 1512 01:12:27,255 --> 01:12:28,256 Roger's habits, too. 1513 01:12:28,300 --> 01:12:30,171 JONES [OFFSCREEN]: gentlemen. 1514 01:12:30,215 --> 01:12:33,740 See, this is where Sir Roger will go, right next to the new 1515 01:12:33,784 --> 01:12:34,872 Macbeth there. 1516 01:12:34,915 --> 01:12:36,264 Will you come this way, gentlemen? 1517 01:12:36,308 --> 01:12:37,483 All our storage is downstairs. 1518 01:12:46,318 --> 01:12:47,580 SUPT DURK [OFFSCREEN]: When are you opening your exhibit? 1519 01:12:47,624 --> 01:12:48,799 -Oh, in a few days. 1520 01:12:48,842 --> 01:12:51,410 And now that his death is a murder, we'll 1521 01:12:51,454 --> 01:12:52,803 hurry it up, naturally. 1522 01:12:52,846 --> 01:12:54,718 You know, people do enjoy that sort of thing. 1523 01:12:54,761 --> 01:12:55,588 -Oh, yes, naturally. 1524 01:12:55,632 --> 01:12:56,720 -And over here-- 1525 01:12:56,763 --> 01:12:58,548 -Bloody lifelike set of arms, there. 1526 01:12:58,591 --> 01:13:00,811 -Er, come over this way, because I think Sir Roger's 1527 01:13:00,854 --> 01:13:02,769 these things are in one of these baskets. 1528 01:13:02,813 --> 01:13:05,424 -I didn't think there was any harm, Mr. Durk, in letting 1529 01:13:05,468 --> 01:13:07,295 them have Sir Roger's clothes. 1530 01:13:07,339 --> 01:13:09,776 After all, he was famous for the way he dressed. 1531 01:13:09,820 --> 01:13:10,603 Oh, good heavens. 1532 01:13:10,647 --> 01:13:12,475 Look, look, look. 1533 01:13:12,518 --> 01:13:13,693 Oh, good heavens. 1534 01:13:17,828 --> 01:13:18,785 -That's not wax. 1535 01:13:18,829 --> 01:13:19,743 -[CHUCKLING] Oh-- 1536 01:13:19,786 --> 01:13:21,397 oh, yes, sir. 1537 01:13:21,440 --> 01:13:23,660 We took it from a bust that was made last year. 1538 01:13:23,703 --> 01:13:25,313 It's not a bad likeness. 1539 01:13:25,357 --> 01:13:29,317 Oh, ah, yes, here we are. 1540 01:13:29,361 --> 01:13:32,451 Now then, exactly what is it you're looking for in here? 1541 01:13:32,495 --> 01:13:33,278 -The umbrella, sir. 1542 01:13:33,321 --> 01:13:34,540 -Oh, yes. 1543 01:13:34,584 --> 01:13:35,672 -You see, I have this theory that it might 1544 01:13:35,715 --> 01:13:37,456 be the wrong one. 1545 01:13:37,500 --> 01:13:39,458 Otherwise, why would the stage doorman's be stolen? 1546 01:13:39,502 --> 01:13:43,462 I mean, if the stage doorman's umbrella somehow got mixed up 1547 01:13:43,506 --> 01:13:44,332 with Sir Roger's-- 1548 01:13:44,376 --> 01:13:45,899 -Quite, quite. 1549 01:13:45,943 --> 01:13:48,641 We would know exactly where Sir Roger went last night, if 1550 01:13:48,685 --> 01:13:50,426 indeed he went anywhere at all. 1551 01:13:50,469 --> 01:13:52,297 -Ah, here you are, sir. 1552 01:13:52,340 --> 01:13:53,820 -Oh, thank you. 1553 01:13:53,864 --> 01:13:55,474 -Mr. Tanner said that the maid might not have noticed the 1554 01:13:55,518 --> 01:13:57,389 difference when they took the stuff out. 1555 01:13:57,433 --> 01:13:59,913 Mr. Tanner, could you identify this? 1556 01:13:59,957 --> 01:14:01,349 -Oh, yes, yes, that's it, that's it. 1557 01:14:01,393 --> 01:14:02,655 Rosewood, you see? 1558 01:14:02,699 --> 01:14:05,484 That was a gift from Lady Astor years ago. 1559 01:14:05,528 --> 01:14:07,225 The-- 1560 01:14:07,268 --> 01:14:09,445 yes, the engraving's a bit faded, and of course, I've had 1561 01:14:09,488 --> 01:14:11,708 the material changed, time and again. 1562 01:14:11,751 --> 01:14:12,796 -No, no, you're wrong. 1563 01:14:12,839 --> 01:14:14,275 You have to be wrong. 1564 01:14:14,319 --> 01:14:15,712 -It is Sir Roger's. 1565 01:14:15,755 --> 01:14:17,409 I recognize it myself. 1566 01:14:17,453 --> 01:14:18,584 -No, that's impossible. 1567 01:14:22,022 --> 01:14:23,415 Unless, of course, somebody-- 1568 01:14:28,072 --> 01:14:31,902 Mr. Tanner, who else has been asking you about umbrellas? 1569 01:14:31,945 --> 01:14:34,774 Possibly just before I arrived at the house tonight. 1570 01:14:34,818 --> 01:14:36,297 -No one. 1571 01:14:36,341 --> 01:14:37,298 -Are you certain? 1572 01:14:37,342 --> 01:14:38,778 -Absolutely. 1573 01:14:38,822 --> 01:14:41,955 -Could have sworn-- 1574 01:14:41,999 --> 01:14:45,524 on my way out to the house, my taxi was almost hit by one of 1575 01:14:45,568 --> 01:14:47,613 those English sports cars-- 1576 01:14:47,657 --> 01:14:50,703 the same kind as Mr. Frame drives. 1577 01:14:50,747 --> 01:14:54,402 -We do have quite a number of English cars over here. 1578 01:14:54,446 --> 01:14:58,015 And I suppose you can find dangerous drivers anywhere. 1579 01:14:58,058 --> 01:15:00,757 -There's got to be an explanation. 1580 01:15:00,800 --> 01:15:02,062 Somebody feel a draft? 1581 01:15:02,106 --> 01:15:03,411 -A draft? 1582 01:15:03,455 --> 01:15:04,848 -I think I feel a draft. 1583 01:15:04,891 --> 01:15:06,414 Maybe there's a window open. 1584 01:15:06,458 --> 01:15:08,460 Maybe somebody got in here through a window. 1585 01:15:12,551 --> 01:15:13,813 Is this the only window? 1586 01:15:13,857 --> 01:15:16,033 -Oh, yes, sir, it's the only windows. 1587 01:15:16,076 --> 01:15:16,903 -Hmm. 1588 01:15:16,947 --> 01:15:18,383 SUPT. 1589 01:15:18,426 --> 01:15:18,818 DURK [OFFSCREEN]: So your bird has flown. 1590 01:15:18,862 --> 01:15:19,427 -Hmm. 1591 01:15:19,471 --> 01:15:20,516 What? 1592 01:15:20,559 --> 01:15:22,561 -Your little theory, Columbo. 1593 01:15:22,605 --> 01:15:24,041 Good Lord, look at the time. 1594 01:15:24,084 --> 01:15:26,696 -Wait, please. 1595 01:15:26,739 --> 01:15:28,567 There has to be an explanation. 1596 01:15:28,611 --> 01:15:29,655 -Oh, come, come, come, come. 1597 01:15:29,699 --> 01:15:31,439 Don't be so distressed. 1598 01:15:31,483 --> 01:15:33,746 At least it's been amusing chasing an American wild goose 1599 01:15:33,790 --> 01:15:35,095 for a change, eh? 1600 01:15:35,139 --> 01:15:36,488 Hm? 1601 01:15:46,716 --> 01:15:48,413 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: "Astonishing," he says. 1602 01:15:48,456 --> 01:15:51,938 "One would never have guessed that this radiant ingenue of 1603 01:15:51,982 --> 01:15:56,247 years past could deliver such power as Lady Macbeth, almost 1604 01:15:56,290 --> 01:15:58,031 as though she were born for the part. 1605 01:15:58,075 --> 01:15:59,598 [both laughing] 1606 01:15:59,642 --> 01:16:00,599 NICHOLAS FRAME: Oh, what's that, the "Express"? 1607 01:16:00,643 --> 01:16:02,340 -Mm, I love him. 1608 01:16:02,383 --> 01:16:05,604 "And as for Mr. Nicholas Frame's surprisingly eloquent 1609 01:16:05,648 --> 01:16:09,608 interpretation of this Shakespearean tragedy, I think 1610 01:16:09,652 --> 01:16:10,783 it's the best--" 1611 01:16:10,827 --> 01:16:11,697 -Here, let's trade. 1612 01:16:11,741 --> 01:16:16,049 [both laugh] 1613 01:16:16,093 --> 01:16:17,921 -Ah, listen to this. 1614 01:16:17,964 --> 01:16:21,272 "Regretfully, though, Mr. Nicholas Frame's still 1615 01:16:21,315 --> 01:16:23,927 glorious voice was in charge of the evening-- 1616 01:16:23,970 --> 01:16:25,842 charging in various noble 1617 01:16:25,885 --> 01:16:26,886 directions." -Aaahh! 1618 01:16:26,930 --> 01:16:28,279 I thought I'd hidden that one. 1619 01:16:28,322 --> 01:16:29,628 [both laugh] 1620 01:16:29,672 --> 01:16:30,760 -Coward. 1621 01:16:30,803 --> 01:16:31,587 -Well, one out of ten, you know. 1622 01:16:31,630 --> 01:16:33,589 That's not bad. 1623 01:16:33,632 --> 01:16:34,633 -[GIDDILY] Oh, I'm lovely. 1624 01:16:34,677 --> 01:16:35,982 I'm gorgeous. 1625 01:16:36,026 --> 01:16:38,681 I'm the greatest actress since Sarah Bernhardt. 1626 01:16:38,724 --> 01:16:41,771 Oh, darling, they actually liked us. 1627 01:16:41,814 --> 01:16:44,077 -Success, your majesty. 1628 01:16:44,121 --> 01:16:46,036 Stark raving success. 1629 01:16:49,605 --> 01:16:53,478 After all those years of miserable second leads. 1630 01:16:53,521 --> 01:16:55,654 -Now nothing can stop us, can it? 1631 01:16:55,698 --> 01:16:59,615 And no one will ever be able to prove that we were within 1632 01:16:59,658 --> 01:17:00,790 miles of Roger when-- 1633 01:17:00,833 --> 01:17:01,834 [buzzer] 1634 01:17:01,878 --> 01:17:03,357 -Listen. 1635 01:17:03,401 --> 01:17:04,532 More cables and telegrams. 1636 01:17:04,576 --> 01:17:06,622 Go on, answer it, answer it! 1637 01:17:06,665 --> 01:17:14,717 [both laughing] 1638 01:17:14,760 --> 01:17:15,892 -Oooh! 1639 01:17:21,811 --> 01:17:23,116 -Tanner. 1640 01:17:23,160 --> 01:17:24,117 -Good morning, sir. 1641 01:17:24,161 --> 01:17:26,076 I hope I'm not too early. 1642 01:17:26,119 --> 01:17:27,686 Heh, excuse me. 1643 01:17:27,730 --> 01:17:30,471 I happened to notice the "Guardian" just reached the 1644 01:17:30,515 --> 01:17:31,777 newsstands. 1645 01:17:31,821 --> 01:17:34,040 I thought perhaps you'd like to glance at it. 1646 01:17:34,084 --> 01:17:36,042 -Oh, well, that's-- that's very thoughtful of you. 1647 01:17:36,086 --> 01:17:37,000 I-- 1648 01:17:37,043 --> 01:17:38,828 -It is quite a rave, sir. 1649 01:17:38,871 --> 01:17:41,744 I'm delighted to read that up till now, you've only received 1650 01:17:41,787 --> 01:17:44,660 one, shall we say, inadequate notice. 1651 01:17:44,703 --> 01:17:45,791 -Oh, but that-- 1652 01:17:45,835 --> 01:17:47,097 what's this? 1653 01:17:47,140 --> 01:17:47,967 -Croissants, sir. 1654 01:17:48,011 --> 01:17:50,056 -Nick, what is it? 1655 01:17:50,100 --> 01:17:51,014 Oh. 1656 01:17:51,057 --> 01:17:52,668 -Oh, good morning, madam. 1657 01:17:52,711 --> 01:17:53,973 I've brought you some croissants, fresh from that 1658 01:17:54,017 --> 01:17:56,149 nice little dairy on the corner of Beale Street. 1659 01:17:56,193 --> 01:17:58,761 I thought that after your trials last night the least I 1660 01:17:58,804 --> 01:18:01,111 could do was to serve you breakfast in bed. 1661 01:18:01,154 --> 01:18:02,808 -Tanner, what the devil-- 1662 01:18:02,852 --> 01:18:05,506 -I'm afraid I won't be able to stay very long today. 1663 01:18:05,550 --> 01:18:09,772 When someone in my position suffers a tragic loss, madam, 1664 01:18:09,815 --> 01:18:12,035 one has to think to one's future employment. 1665 01:18:12,078 --> 01:18:13,950 -We already have a maid. 1666 01:18:13,993 --> 01:18:17,997 -Scarcely adequate for persons of your station, wouldn't you 1667 01:18:18,041 --> 01:18:18,824 say? 1668 01:18:18,868 --> 01:18:20,652 -Now, now see here. 1669 01:18:20,696 --> 01:18:22,654 -Tanner, was it you, by any chance, who happened to notice 1670 01:18:22,698 --> 01:18:25,526 my husband buying tickets to Covent Garden the other day 1671 01:18:25,570 --> 01:18:27,093 and told Sir Roger about it? 1672 01:18:27,137 --> 01:18:29,748 -Oh, very regrettable. 1673 01:18:29,792 --> 01:18:33,143 But, uh, loyalty to one's master. 1674 01:18:33,186 --> 01:18:34,492 -Filthy snoop. 1675 01:18:34,535 --> 01:18:35,754 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: told you 1676 01:18:35,798 --> 01:18:37,060 it wasn't Miss Dudley. 1677 01:18:37,103 --> 01:18:38,801 -Throw him out of here. 1678 01:18:38,844 --> 01:18:40,411 -Madam, please, please. 1679 01:18:40,454 --> 01:18:44,458 You know, Sir Roger was beginning to show signs of 1680 01:18:44,502 --> 01:18:47,810 distrust with regard to your amorous interest in him. 1681 01:18:47,853 --> 01:18:51,639 But be rest assured, both of you, that in your employ, my 1682 01:18:51,683 --> 01:18:53,163 loyalty will be doubly great. 1683 01:18:56,079 --> 01:18:58,168 I take it that's the kitchen in there? 1684 01:18:58,211 --> 01:18:58,777 -Nick! 1685 01:18:58,821 --> 01:19:00,431 -Wait. 1686 01:19:00,474 --> 01:19:00,866 Tanner. 1687 01:19:00,910 --> 01:19:02,041 -Yes? 1688 01:19:02,085 --> 01:19:03,739 -What else? 1689 01:19:03,782 --> 01:19:04,827 -Let me think. 1690 01:19:04,870 --> 01:19:06,567 -Oh, yes. 1691 01:19:06,611 --> 01:19:08,787 It might interest you to know that your concern about a 1692 01:19:08,831 --> 01:19:13,096 certain umbrella hasn't been mentioned to a single soul. 1693 01:19:13,139 --> 01:19:15,968 But I do hope that certain other umbrellas have been 1694 01:19:16,012 --> 01:19:19,842 properly disposed of in the river by now. 1695 01:19:19,885 --> 01:19:22,758 -Tanner, what sort of wages would you 1696 01:19:22,801 --> 01:19:24,890 expect, working for us? 1697 01:19:24,934 --> 01:19:26,805 -Oh, madam, don't let's talk about 1698 01:19:26,849 --> 01:19:28,633 that until after breakfast. 1699 01:19:38,948 --> 01:19:41,037 -Holmes, Sherlock Holmes, was, I suppose, 1700 01:19:41,080 --> 01:19:42,865 our most famous detective. 1701 01:19:42,908 --> 01:19:45,781 But I'm sure you noticed on your visit to our new file 1702 01:19:45,824 --> 01:19:47,565 section at the Yard why he wouldn't even 1703 01:19:47,608 --> 01:19:48,827 qualify these days. 1704 01:19:48,871 --> 01:19:50,046 No, no, our modern policemen-- 1705 01:19:55,921 --> 01:19:59,795 -Those fish and chips are greasy, but they're sure good. 1706 01:19:59,838 --> 01:20:00,839 What were you saying, sir? 1707 01:20:00,883 --> 01:20:02,623 -Oh, special section. 1708 01:20:02,667 --> 01:20:04,712 Well, as you've only a couple of days here, I expect you'd 1709 01:20:04,756 --> 01:20:07,759 like to see how we handle some of our larger cases. 1710 01:20:07,803 --> 01:20:09,543 I think I can lay that on for you. 1711 01:20:09,587 --> 01:20:12,068 As a matter of fact, we had a very interesting case only-- 1712 01:20:12,111 --> 01:20:14,113 -That's Big Ben, isn't it? 1713 01:20:14,157 --> 01:20:15,723 [clock chiming] 1714 01:20:15,767 --> 01:20:16,681 -Yes. 1715 01:20:16,724 --> 01:20:22,948 [clock chiming] 1716 01:20:22,992 --> 01:20:24,645 -Boy, that's terrific. 1717 01:20:24,689 --> 01:20:27,257 Thing that old, it's only a minute slow. 1718 01:20:27,300 --> 01:20:28,693 -Really. 1719 01:20:28,736 --> 01:20:29,694 We must put another penny on the governor. 1720 01:20:37,136 --> 01:20:38,224 -Did you get petrol? 1721 01:20:38,268 --> 01:20:39,835 -Yes, of course I got petrol. 1722 01:20:39,878 --> 01:20:41,097 -Now watch it, darling. 1723 01:20:45,710 --> 01:20:47,668 Take these. 1724 01:20:47,712 --> 01:20:49,757 -Is there any air in these tires? 1725 01:20:49,801 --> 01:20:50,584 -Oh. 1726 01:20:50,628 --> 01:20:52,543 Tie that tightly. 1727 01:20:52,586 --> 01:20:54,806 -Nicky, supposing you had a flat tire. 1728 01:20:54,850 --> 01:20:56,634 -Darling, of course there's air. 1729 01:20:56,677 --> 01:20:58,201 -Listen, we've got to hurry. 1730 01:20:58,244 --> 01:21:00,203 -I know, I know we do. 1731 01:21:00,246 --> 01:21:03,597 This deed I'll do before this purpose cools. 1732 01:21:03,641 --> 01:21:06,165 -Stop acting. 1733 01:21:06,209 --> 01:21:10,604 -Lily, did-- do we really have to do this? 1734 01:21:10,648 --> 01:21:12,911 -Nick, we've been through all that before. 1735 01:21:12,955 --> 01:21:14,870 What else can we do? 1736 01:21:19,048 --> 01:21:23,661 -Lily, if we get out there too early, the police 1737 01:21:23,704 --> 01:21:25,097 might still be there. 1738 01:21:25,141 --> 01:21:27,708 -That's what the bicycle is for, so that you can ride in 1739 01:21:27,752 --> 01:21:30,015 the back way, and no one will notice you. 1740 01:21:30,059 --> 01:21:32,017 -[LAUGHING] I haven't ridden a bicycle for ten years. 1741 01:21:32,061 --> 01:21:34,150 -You can't start practicing now. 1742 01:21:34,193 --> 01:21:35,586 -Oh. 1743 01:21:35,629 --> 01:21:36,761 -Besides-- 1744 01:21:39,764 --> 01:21:42,941 Tanner says there won't be any police there because they 1745 01:21:42,985 --> 01:21:44,943 haven't started doing an inventory yet. 1746 01:21:44,987 --> 01:21:47,163 They have to wait for an expert from Oxford. 1747 01:21:47,206 --> 01:21:48,686 -Ah, yes. 1748 01:21:48,729 --> 01:21:50,949 What would we have done without Tanner, huh? 1749 01:21:50,993 --> 01:21:52,124 Good old faithful Tanner. 1750 01:21:52,168 --> 01:21:53,734 [laughs] 1751 01:21:53,778 --> 01:21:54,735 I knew him well. 1752 01:21:54,779 --> 01:21:56,085 -You're off again. 1753 01:21:56,128 --> 01:21:57,260 -Hey! 1754 01:22:25,201 --> 01:22:27,246 -Ah, there you are. 1755 01:22:27,290 --> 01:22:29,292 -Mr. Frame, is this your bicycle. 1756 01:22:29,335 --> 01:22:31,772 -Yes, I, uh, I had a flat up the road. 1757 01:22:31,816 --> 01:22:35,167 Farmer's fixing it for me, so I borrowed this from his kid 1758 01:22:35,211 --> 01:22:36,734 and came in the back way. 1759 01:22:36,777 --> 01:22:37,691 What have we got here? 1760 01:22:37,735 --> 01:22:39,302 -The books, sir. 1761 01:22:39,345 --> 01:22:41,130 I'm going to post them to our numbered box, as we arranged. 1762 01:22:41,173 --> 01:22:43,219 -I just want to have a look, that's all. 1763 01:22:43,262 --> 01:22:46,091 -No, sir, excuse me saying so, but I'm rather concerned about 1764 01:22:46,135 --> 01:22:48,050 removing any more books. 1765 01:22:48,093 --> 01:22:49,094 -Oh, ho, ho. 1766 01:22:49,138 --> 01:22:50,791 Oh, nonsense, Tanner. 1767 01:22:50,835 --> 01:22:53,011 We're all in this together now, aren't we? 1768 01:22:53,055 --> 01:22:55,448 Can't very well pay you suitable wages without the 1769 01:22:55,492 --> 01:22:56,667 wherewithal. 1770 01:22:56,710 --> 01:22:58,234 -I see. 1771 01:22:58,277 --> 01:22:59,670 And of course it would make it look more like a robbery, 1772 01:22:59,713 --> 01:23:00,279 wouldn't it? 1773 01:23:00,323 --> 01:23:01,280 After you, sir. 1774 01:23:01,324 --> 01:23:02,716 -Oh, get in there. 1775 01:23:13,423 --> 01:23:14,598 -Mr. Tanner? 1776 01:23:18,732 --> 01:23:22,301 Mr. Tanner, where are you, sir? 1777 01:23:22,345 --> 01:23:25,957 I've been trying to phone you from the house. 1778 01:23:26,001 --> 01:23:28,438 [screams] 1779 01:23:37,751 --> 01:23:38,970 -Echh. 1780 01:23:48,066 --> 01:23:50,199 -Lieutenant! 1781 01:23:50,242 --> 01:23:52,766 Lieutenant! 1782 01:23:52,810 --> 01:23:56,031 Good news, sir. 1783 01:23:56,074 --> 01:23:57,815 We found something pretty important. 1784 01:23:57,858 --> 01:23:58,946 -You did? 1785 01:23:58,990 --> 01:24:00,687 I knew you would, because I just-- 1786 01:24:00,731 --> 01:24:03,255 I couldn't believe this stupid stuff in the newspaper. 1787 01:24:03,299 --> 01:24:04,343 -Your suitcase, sir. 1788 01:24:04,387 --> 01:24:05,649 Got it in the car. 1789 01:24:05,692 --> 01:24:06,824 Just in the nick of time, eh? 1790 01:24:06,867 --> 01:24:07,564 -Yeah. 1791 01:24:07,607 --> 01:24:09,348 Mr. O'Keefe-- 1792 01:24:09,392 --> 01:24:10,654 -Well, we'd better get you to the airport very quick, sir. 1793 01:24:10,697 --> 01:24:12,395 -Tell me something. 1794 01:24:12,438 --> 01:24:14,049 Says here the butler did it. 1795 01:24:14,092 --> 01:24:15,746 Chief Superintendent Durk-- 1796 01:24:15,789 --> 01:24:18,357 does he really believe that Mr. Tanner killed Sir Roger, 1797 01:24:18,401 --> 01:24:20,359 panicked, and then killed himself? 1798 01:24:20,403 --> 01:24:22,013 -Uh, there was some evidence. 1799 01:24:22,057 --> 01:24:23,928 I mean, the butler had quite a little cache of Sir Roger's 1800 01:24:23,971 --> 01:24:27,018 best books, including the Irving, stashed away beneath 1801 01:24:27,062 --> 01:24:28,367 the floorboards. 1802 01:24:28,411 --> 01:24:29,890 Must be worth close to half a million-- 1803 01:24:29,934 --> 01:24:31,414 -I know, but-- 1804 01:24:31,457 --> 01:24:33,416 -That's what the papers guess at. 1805 01:24:33,459 --> 01:24:35,809 What Durk really thinks? 1806 01:24:35,853 --> 01:24:38,551 Well, he's not much to live with today, I can tell you 1807 01:24:38,595 --> 01:24:39,074 that, sir. 1808 01:24:39,117 --> 01:24:40,771 -Mmm. 1809 01:24:40,814 --> 01:24:43,513 You know, I keep thinking to myself, if I'd stayed out of 1810 01:24:43,556 --> 01:24:45,993 his hair, if maybe I hadn't come up with my theory and 1811 01:24:46,037 --> 01:24:46,864 butted in-- 1812 01:24:46,907 --> 01:24:47,908 -Oh, now, no, no, no. 1813 01:24:47,952 --> 01:24:49,040 No blame, sir. 1814 01:24:49,084 --> 01:24:50,563 No. 1815 01:24:50,607 --> 01:24:51,825 He told you so himself when he said goodbye. 1816 01:24:51,869 --> 01:24:53,653 It's not your fault there are no clues. 1817 01:24:53,697 --> 01:24:56,047 -And all we needed was one little one. 1818 01:24:56,091 --> 01:24:58,963 Like to where Sir Roger was that one night. 1819 01:24:59,006 --> 01:25:00,747 SGT O'KEEFE [OFFSCREEN]: Well, as I always say to the missus, 1820 01:25:00,791 --> 01:25:03,489 sir, a policeman's lot is not an happy one. 1821 01:25:03,533 --> 01:25:05,926 -Yeah. 1822 01:25:05,970 --> 01:25:08,320 You know, I bet I've read this thing a hundred-- 1823 01:25:10,975 --> 01:25:14,631 didn't read that part. 1824 01:25:14,674 --> 01:25:16,676 That exhibit at the London Wax Museum is 1825 01:25:16,720 --> 01:25:17,590 opening this afternoon. 1826 01:25:17,634 --> 01:25:18,809 Would you take me? 1827 01:25:21,420 --> 01:25:23,770 Now we gotta call Mr. Durk, ask him to meet us there. 1828 01:25:23,814 --> 01:25:25,772 Oh, and I want to buy something-- an umbrella. 1829 01:26:17,476 --> 01:26:22,394 [applause] 1830 01:26:22,438 --> 01:26:23,134 LILLIAN STANHOPE [OFFSCREEN]: [LAUGHING] 1831 01:26:23,178 --> 01:26:24,527 All those sweet people. 1832 01:26:24,570 --> 01:26:26,442 They're just lovely people. 1833 01:26:26,485 --> 01:26:29,488 -My name is Jones, Miss Stanhope and Mr. Frame. 1834 01:26:29,532 --> 01:26:30,663 Perhaps you remember. 1835 01:26:30,707 --> 01:26:32,361 -Of course, of course. 1836 01:26:32,404 --> 01:26:34,058 We got your message, hurried over as quickly as we could. 1837 01:26:34,101 --> 01:26:35,538 -Aren't you a little late with the opening? 1838 01:26:35,581 --> 01:26:36,713 They'll break down the door. 1839 01:26:36,756 --> 01:26:38,193 -Oh, yes, a bit, but-- 1840 01:26:38,236 --> 01:26:39,150 -Oh, look! 1841 01:26:39,194 --> 01:26:42,458 Drapes and everything. 1842 01:26:42,501 --> 01:26:43,676 -Oh, what's the idea, Jones? 1843 01:26:43,720 --> 01:26:45,112 You going to have a regular unveiling? 1844 01:26:45,156 --> 01:26:47,854 -Oh, yes, sir, in a manner of speaking. 1845 01:26:47,898 --> 01:26:49,769 -Yes, I thought it might be something like that, so on the 1846 01:26:49,813 --> 01:26:50,857 way over, I made some notes. 1847 01:26:50,901 --> 01:26:52,511 I'd be glad to say a few words. 1848 01:26:52,555 --> 01:26:53,643 -Oh, thank you. 1849 01:26:53,686 --> 01:26:54,731 Thank you very much, sir. 1850 01:26:54,774 --> 01:26:55,949 Er, excuse me. 1851 01:27:06,960 --> 01:27:08,092 SUPT. 1852 01:27:08,135 --> 01:27:08,788 DURK [OFFSCREEN]: They here yet, Jones? 1853 01:27:08,832 --> 01:27:09,615 -Yes, sir. 1854 01:27:09,659 --> 01:27:09,920 They just arrived. 1855 01:27:21,148 --> 01:27:23,020 -That's Mr. Durk's car, sir. 1856 01:27:23,063 --> 01:27:25,718 He's beaten us to it. 1857 01:27:25,762 --> 01:27:27,067 Good luck, Lieutenant. 1858 01:27:38,862 --> 01:27:39,819 -Where the devil is-- 1859 01:27:39,863 --> 01:27:41,212 [knock] 1860 01:27:41,256 --> 01:27:42,561 -Columbo? 1861 01:27:48,872 --> 01:27:50,439 -Boy, a lot of people here. 1862 01:28:00,057 --> 01:28:01,580 -Why, Mr. Durk. 1863 01:28:01,624 --> 01:28:03,582 -Miss Stanhope, Mr. Frame. 1864 01:28:03,626 --> 01:28:04,888 -Oh, Lieutenant. 1865 01:28:04,931 --> 01:28:07,238 You're beginning to look exactly like a Londoner. 1866 01:28:07,282 --> 01:28:08,674 -Oh, you mean this? 1867 01:28:08,718 --> 01:28:10,241 No, no, no, ma'am, I just bought this. 1868 01:28:10,285 --> 01:28:12,504 You see, ever since I've been in London, I've been thinking 1869 01:28:12,548 --> 01:28:14,593 and thinking, what would be the best souvenir to bring 1870 01:28:14,637 --> 01:28:16,247 back to Los Angeles? 1871 01:28:16,291 --> 01:28:17,074 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: I thought you'd be on your way 1872 01:28:17,117 --> 01:28:18,467 back home by now. 1873 01:28:18,510 --> 01:28:19,163 COLUMBO [OFFSCREEN]: Right, but I sort 1874 01:28:19,206 --> 01:28:20,469 of missed the plane. 1875 01:28:20,512 --> 01:28:21,296 Anyway, it suddenly struck me-- 1876 01:28:21,339 --> 01:28:22,949 an umbrella. 1877 01:28:22,993 --> 01:28:26,910 -Mr. Jones, did someone ask you to invite us here? 1878 01:28:26,953 --> 01:28:28,651 -What are those curtains doing there? 1879 01:28:28,694 --> 01:28:30,609 I thought we were going to get to see an exhibit. 1880 01:28:30,653 --> 01:28:31,088 -Jones? 1881 01:28:31,131 --> 01:28:32,916 -Oh, yes. 1882 01:28:32,959 --> 01:28:35,745 -Yes, I'm dying to see it, after all that silly business 1883 01:28:35,788 --> 01:28:36,963 we had modeling for it. 1884 01:28:41,185 --> 01:28:42,534 -There you are, sir. 1885 01:28:45,363 --> 01:28:46,146 Quite remarkable. 1886 01:28:46,190 --> 01:28:47,844 -Yes, it is. 1887 01:28:47,887 --> 01:28:49,976 -Oh, do I really look like that? 1888 01:28:50,020 --> 01:28:50,803 -Marvelous. 1889 01:28:50,847 --> 01:28:52,544 Let me tell you-- 1890 01:28:52,588 --> 01:28:54,851 I don't want to repeat myself, but the other night, when I 1891 01:28:54,894 --> 01:28:56,983 saw that performance that you two-- 1892 01:28:57,027 --> 01:28:59,159 -Durk, will you please explain what we're doing here? 1893 01:28:59,203 --> 01:29:00,944 -Why don't you ask the tour guide? 1894 01:29:00,987 --> 01:29:01,945 -Well, what about the other one. 1895 01:29:01,988 --> 01:29:03,033 Isn't Mr. Haversham ready? 1896 01:29:03,076 --> 01:29:04,295 JONES [OFFSCREEN]: Oh, yes, yes. 1897 01:29:04,339 --> 01:29:05,862 -I'm sure you want to see this, too. 1898 01:29:05,905 --> 01:29:07,080 It's part of the exhibit. 1899 01:29:09,866 --> 01:29:11,302 Look at that. 1900 01:29:11,346 --> 01:29:14,305 Boy, isn't that something? 1901 01:29:14,349 --> 01:29:16,307 'Course, I didn't know him the way you folks did. 1902 01:29:16,351 --> 01:29:18,353 I guess you were closer to him than anybody. 1903 01:29:18,396 --> 01:29:19,658 -[TEARFULLY] Poor Roger. 1904 01:29:22,095 --> 01:29:24,750 -Kind of shakes you, doesn't it? 1905 01:29:24,794 --> 01:29:28,188 Do you know, they have stuff in the Chamber of Horrors here 1906 01:29:28,232 --> 01:29:30,321 that actually makes my skin crawl? 1907 01:29:30,365 --> 01:29:33,368 -I think it's disgusting, putting him on display. 1908 01:29:33,411 --> 01:29:36,327 -Oh, listen, I know how you must feel. 1909 01:29:36,371 --> 01:29:38,198 And I sympathize with you. 1910 01:29:38,242 --> 01:29:40,026 But you know, somebody's been murdered, and you know what 1911 01:29:40,070 --> 01:29:41,680 they tell me? 1912 01:29:41,724 --> 01:29:43,203 They tell me folks around here, they kind of enjoy that 1913 01:29:43,247 --> 01:29:44,944 sort of thing. 1914 01:29:44,988 --> 01:29:47,033 You want to bet they hang up a figure of Mr. Tanner, too? 1915 01:29:47,077 --> 01:29:49,862 -Most people, Columbo, have frightful taste-- 1916 01:29:49,906 --> 01:29:51,995 yourself included. 1917 01:29:52,038 --> 01:29:52,865 Now you'll have to excuse us. 1918 01:29:52,909 --> 01:29:54,824 Come along, Lily. 1919 01:29:54,867 --> 01:29:56,260 -Not just yet, sir. 1920 01:29:56,303 --> 01:29:57,783 -Well, if you think we're going to play some sort of 1921 01:29:57,827 --> 01:29:59,132 charade with this ridiculous-- 1922 01:29:59,176 --> 01:30:00,743 -Gee, Mr. Frame, I'm always getting you angry. 1923 01:30:00,786 --> 01:30:01,918 I'm sorry about that. 1924 01:30:01,961 --> 01:30:03,310 It must be my accent or something. 1925 01:30:03,354 --> 01:30:05,661 But I wanted you here because I wanted you to 1926 01:30:05,704 --> 01:30:06,792 help me prove something. 1927 01:30:06,836 --> 01:30:09,142 Um, I think I'll get rid of this. 1928 01:30:12,798 --> 01:30:14,409 I don't think Mr. Tanner killed anybody, like the 1929 01:30:14,452 --> 01:30:16,236 newspapers are saying. 1930 01:30:16,280 --> 01:30:17,629 I think it was you. 1931 01:30:20,240 --> 01:30:23,156 -[laughs] 1932 01:30:23,200 --> 01:30:27,857 Oh, Lieutenant, just when I was beginning to like you. 1933 01:30:27,900 --> 01:30:32,905 -This is going to sound silly, but Sir Roger, he was killed 1934 01:30:32,949 --> 01:30:35,821 someplace else, and his body was moved later on. 1935 01:30:35,865 --> 01:30:38,389 And if I can only prove where it was that he drove that 1936 01:30:38,433 --> 01:30:43,786 night, prove who it was that he went to see, then 1937 01:30:43,829 --> 01:30:45,440 everything will start falling into place. 1938 01:30:45,483 --> 01:30:47,050 -Well, he did not come to see us. 1939 01:30:47,093 --> 01:30:48,617 Now how many times-- 1940 01:30:48,660 --> 01:30:51,271 -No, sir, not to your dressing room in the theater. 1941 01:30:51,315 --> 01:30:52,403 It was to yours. 1942 01:30:55,972 --> 01:30:57,713 That's where the umbrellas come in. 1943 01:30:57,756 --> 01:30:59,279 I guess umbrellas are the kind of thing that I can 1944 01:30:59,323 --> 01:31:00,977 understand. 1945 01:31:01,020 --> 01:31:02,848 You know, I've been watching people to see what they do 1946 01:31:02,892 --> 01:31:06,809 with umbrellas when they come in out of the rain. 1947 01:31:06,852 --> 01:31:11,466 They close the umbrella, they give it a shake like this, and 1948 01:31:11,509 --> 01:31:14,207 they find someplace to lean it against. 1949 01:31:14,251 --> 01:31:18,298 But they never fasten this strap, because then it won't 1950 01:31:18,342 --> 01:31:20,083 dry properly. 1951 01:31:20,126 --> 01:31:21,780 -Fascinating. 1952 01:31:21,824 --> 01:31:23,086 COLUMBO [OFFSCREEN]: There's only one problem with that. 1953 01:31:23,129 --> 01:31:26,959 Sometimes things drop in. 1954 01:31:27,003 --> 01:31:28,178 Almost anything can drop in. 1955 01:31:32,356 --> 01:31:35,881 So I got to thinking, if maybe that's what's Sir Roger did 1956 01:31:35,925 --> 01:31:40,799 with his umbrella, and something dropped into it that 1957 01:31:40,843 --> 01:31:45,412 night, well, then maybe, um-- 1958 01:31:45,456 --> 01:31:47,371 got these things here, somewhere. 1959 01:31:47,414 --> 01:31:49,460 Just give me a moment, would you? 1960 01:31:49,504 --> 01:31:50,461 [coughs loudly] 1961 01:31:50,505 --> 01:31:53,290 Oh, forgive me. 1962 01:31:53,333 --> 01:31:54,683 Amazing likeness, isn't it? 1963 01:31:58,861 --> 01:32:00,297 Where was I? 1964 01:32:00,340 --> 01:32:01,994 Oh, yes. 1965 01:32:02,038 --> 01:32:06,129 Um, ma'am, the other night I stepped on a pearl in your 1966 01:32:06,172 --> 01:32:07,434 dressing room. 1967 01:32:07,478 --> 01:32:08,784 I have some more just like it. 1968 01:32:08,827 --> 01:32:09,872 I got it from your costumer. 1969 01:32:09,915 --> 01:32:11,177 She says she makes them. 1970 01:32:11,221 --> 01:32:13,005 -Oh, yes. 1971 01:32:13,049 --> 01:32:16,313 -Well, maybe if the necklace was broken in the fight, like 1972 01:32:16,356 --> 01:32:16,922 you said-- 1973 01:32:16,966 --> 01:32:17,488 -But-- 1974 01:32:17,532 --> 01:32:18,315 but that-- 1975 01:32:18,358 --> 01:32:21,057 that was Nicky and I. 1976 01:32:21,100 --> 01:32:23,973 -Uh, Jones, bring us that umbrella, would you? 1977 01:32:24,016 --> 01:32:25,061 JONES [OFFSCREEN]: Oh, yes. 1978 01:32:25,104 --> 01:32:26,279 Yes. 1979 01:32:30,240 --> 01:32:33,417 -Well, there's a chance, a pretty good chance, that if 1980 01:32:33,460 --> 01:32:34,984 the fight was with Sir Roger-- 1981 01:32:35,027 --> 01:32:35,724 -No! 1982 01:32:35,767 --> 01:32:36,942 No, it wasn't! 1983 01:32:36,986 --> 01:32:38,553 -Well, there's no point speculating. 1984 01:32:38,596 --> 01:32:39,902 Mr. Jones. 1985 01:32:39,945 --> 01:32:41,207 Could we move back just a little, give 1986 01:32:41,251 --> 01:32:42,948 the gentleman room? 1987 01:32:42,992 --> 01:32:45,081 Mr. Jones, would you open the umbrella, sir? 1988 01:33:01,271 --> 01:33:03,447 -Why, it's the same. 1989 01:33:03,490 --> 01:33:05,884 Exactly the same. 1990 01:33:05,928 --> 01:33:08,887 -Well, ma'am? 1991 01:33:08,931 --> 01:33:10,106 Sir? 1992 01:33:11,934 --> 01:33:12,369 -Sir. 1993 01:33:12,412 --> 01:33:17,026 [laughs] 1994 01:33:17,069 --> 01:33:17,896 Sir. 1995 01:33:17,940 --> 01:33:23,554 [laughs] 1996 01:33:26,601 --> 01:33:28,341 Tomorrow. 1997 01:33:28,385 --> 01:33:31,606 [laughs maniacally] 1998 01:33:31,649 --> 01:33:35,435 Tomorrow and tomorrow. 1999 01:33:35,479 --> 01:33:37,350 -Nicky, stop it! 2000 01:33:37,394 --> 01:33:39,265 He put it there, can't you see? 2001 01:33:39,309 --> 01:33:40,353 Before we came. 2002 01:33:40,397 --> 01:33:42,442 He put it there. 2003 01:33:42,486 --> 01:33:45,968 -Er, Jones, has anybody but you touched that umbrella? 2004 01:33:46,011 --> 01:33:46,882 -No, sir. 2005 01:33:46,925 --> 01:33:47,926 I'll testify to that. 2006 01:33:47,970 --> 01:33:49,319 -Of recorded time-- 2007 01:33:49,362 --> 01:33:50,842 -Then he must have done it when we weren't looking. 2008 01:33:50,886 --> 01:33:52,061 -[LAUGHING] And all our yesterdays-- 2009 01:33:52,104 --> 01:33:52,931 -Oh, Nicky, please! 2010 01:33:52,975 --> 01:33:54,411 -Have lighted fools-- 2011 01:33:54,454 --> 01:33:55,368 -He-- 2012 01:33:55,412 --> 01:33:56,935 he was mad, don't you see? 2013 01:33:56,979 --> 01:33:58,067 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: Out, out. 2014 01:33:58,110 --> 01:34:00,286 -He didn't know what he was doing. 2015 01:34:00,330 --> 01:34:01,461 -I know he didn't. 2016 01:34:01,505 --> 01:34:03,594 -And Sir Roger, that was my fault. 2017 01:34:03,638 --> 01:34:04,464 -I understand. 2018 01:34:04,508 --> 01:34:05,640 -It was an accident. 2019 01:34:05,683 --> 01:34:06,336 I-- 2020 01:34:06,379 --> 01:34:07,163 I swear it. 2021 01:34:07,206 --> 01:34:08,512 -Oh, Mr. Durk-- 2022 01:34:08,555 --> 01:34:11,428 -Frets his hour upon the stage. 2023 01:34:11,471 --> 01:34:12,951 -Don't be too hard on Nicky. 2024 01:34:12,995 --> 01:34:15,867 Y-you must try to understand. 2025 01:34:15,911 --> 01:34:19,175 -Yes, well, uh, I think we can settle all this at the Yard. 2026 01:34:19,218 --> 01:34:21,307 Smythe, will you take over, eh? 2027 01:34:21,351 --> 01:34:23,005 -Very good, sir. 2028 01:34:23,048 --> 01:34:24,006 NICHOLAS FRAME [OFFSCREEN]: And fury. 2029 01:34:24,049 --> 01:34:25,398 [giggles] 2030 01:34:25,442 --> 01:34:29,141 Tomorrow and tomorrow-- 2031 01:34:29,185 --> 01:34:31,187 -[sobs] 2032 01:35:04,394 --> 01:35:06,048 -Thank you, Mr. Jones. 2033 01:35:06,091 --> 01:35:08,180 And now I believe you can replace the umbrella and open 2034 01:35:08,224 --> 01:35:09,312 your doors. 2035 01:35:09,355 --> 01:35:10,530 -Anything for the Yard, Mr. Durk. 2036 01:35:10,574 --> 01:35:12,532 It's been very, erm, interesting. 2037 01:35:17,624 --> 01:35:19,278 -Ah, bit of luck, eh? 2038 01:35:19,322 --> 01:35:20,540 -Hm? 2039 01:35:20,584 --> 01:35:23,021 -How did you know that bead was in there? 2040 01:35:23,065 --> 01:35:25,110 -Oh, just the odds. 2041 01:35:25,154 --> 01:35:27,025 -The odds were very poor, and you know it. 2042 01:35:27,069 --> 01:35:29,027 Come now, you can do better than that. 2043 01:35:29,071 --> 01:35:31,160 Off the record, eh? 2044 01:35:31,203 --> 01:35:33,945 -Well, Mr. Durk, when you were maybe in the third or fourth 2045 01:35:33,989 --> 01:35:35,555 grade, and there was a pretty redheaded girl in the front 2046 01:35:35,599 --> 01:35:39,429 row and you couldn't get her attention, um-- 2047 01:35:39,472 --> 01:35:42,388 -Well, go on. 2048 01:35:42,432 --> 01:35:43,999 -Just a little trick I learned. 2049 01:35:44,042 --> 01:35:46,218 [coughs] 2050 01:35:46,262 --> 01:35:47,219 Excuse me. 2051 01:35:47,263 --> 01:35:49,352 Throat. 2052 01:35:49,395 --> 01:35:50,570 Amazing likeness. 2053 01:35:53,617 --> 01:35:53,965 DURK [OFFSCREEN]: By Jove. 2054 01:36:15,117 --> 01:36:25,127 [music playing] 2055 01:36:25,170 --> 01:36:35,180 [music playing] 2056 01:36:35,224 --> 01:36:45,147 [music playing] 2057 01:36:45,190 --> 01:36:51,457 [music playing] 2058 01:36:51,501 --> 01:37:01,467 [music playing] 2059 01:37:01,511 --> 01:37:11,521 [music playing] 2060 01:37:11,564 --> 01:37:18,354 [music playing] 143659

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