All language subtitles for Columbo S01E06 Suitable for Framing 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DD+2 0 H 264-playWEB (1)_track3_[eng]

[music playing]

[gunshot]

[clattering]

[doorbell]

-You're late.

-I'm sorry.

The path out there was dark.

-Anybody see you?

-No.

And I parked where you told me.

-Good.

Take that.

[gasps]

-Get yourself together.

There's no reason to
be frightened.

It's just my uncle.

I assure you he's far more
amiable now than he ever was

when he was alive.

-I'll be all right.

-Of course you will, my love.

I couldn't possibly be any of
help to your career from

inside a gas chamber.

-Don't say things like that.

Anyway, what difference
does my career make.

Dale, look, they're
all yours now!

-They will be.

But not unless you
do you part.

-Don't worry, Dale.

I was just a little upset.

Now I'm fine.

-Good.

Now remember when you open
the window, fire high.

-You better get started.

-Now the electric blanket
goes back upstairs--

-Top drawer, left side.

How many times have
you told me that?

Dale, hurry!

[laughter]

-All right, Melvin.

$5,000 and it's a steal.

Will you please move faster?

Uh, boys, keep those
bottles popping.

Thank you.

Good evening.

-$1,000 and you're not
even a Frenchman.

-Mingle, mingle!

-But, you see, the only thing
I really need is something

pink for the guest bathroom.

-I just paint the
pictures, ma'am.

I don't set prices.

-Uh, don't pick on my artist,
darling After all, your

husband adores canvas.

He told me so.

-I know, but it's the
wrong shade of

pink for the wallpaper.

-Well, how about $800.

I mean, that's if he takes
the green Indian

to go in the office.

Mind you, I feel bad you--

oh, excuse me.

Dale!

Dale Kingston!

I don't believe it!

-Well, the invitation said,
free champagne.

-Ah!

-Mitilda, my love.

-Oh, you're such a snob.

You never come to my showings.

Sam, quick!

-Well, I had nothing to
do tonight, anyway.

I was half hoping that
it would be over.

-Oh, it's just begun!

Please, Dale, excuse me.

Ahem, Sam, um, this is Sam
Franklin, uh, it's his first

private showing, so would
you please be nice?

Honey, this is Dale Kingston.

-Yes, yes.

How do you do, sir?

-Ah, you must be the artist
of these, uh, arid little

landscapes, aren't you?

But they're not too bad.

Not too bad at all.

-Uh, Mr. Kingston?

-Yes.

-Mr. Dale Kingston?

-Yes.

Uh!

And you're the famous
art critic?

-Well, as of the moment, yes.

Whenever the moment passes--

-Of course he is darling!

And you're already raving
about Sam's work.

I'm sorry, dear.

But you couldn't possibly have
this canvas for a penny less

than $1200.

-Well, I, I have five minutes
to 11:00, sir.

-Five to 11:00?

-Yes.

-So it is.

Thank you very much, Mr.
uh, uh, Franklin.

-Oh, of course, you'd
love champagne!

-Oh, you bet.

-Sam, the painting!

You're right.

-And so that the meaning of a
mobile stems not only from its

form, but the relationship
between the pieces, which

gives it its meaning.

And I, I suppose the
relationship between the

pieces is really where
its at, isn't it?

[laughter]

-Oh, yes.

[gunshot]

-It's not so much a question
of his masculinity, I think

the artist just saw
him that way.

I'll drink to that.

[laughter]

-And you'll notice, no matter
how abstract the painting, he

always signs his name
realistically, doesn't he?

-Of course.

[laughter]

CAPTAIN (OFSCREEN): Were
you home tonight?

MR. EVANS (OFFSCREEN):
Oh, no sir.

My wife and I left the
house at 8 o'clock.

It's our regular night off.

-There's just you
and your wife?

No other servants in
a place this size?

-Well, Mr. Matthews seldom
entertained.

He was divorced many years ago
and has very few friends.

Tonight, I believe he planned to
spend in his room, reading.

-Just a minute.

You got all this, Columbo?

You want anything more
from Mr. Evans?

-No.

-Please, sir!

Mr. Matthews was very
fussy about smoking.

-Oh, sorry.

-Uh, Doctor, call it from
downtown, will you?

-Oh, I don't think the autopsy
will change my opinion.

It was a single bullet, must've
died almost instantly.

-And the time of death?

-Oh, I'd say around 11.

Give or take a few minutes.

Wasn't it?

-Yeah.

The body was still warm.

-Mm.

-Talk to you later, Captain.

-Oh!

Mr. Kingston, I've been
trying to reach you.

I'm so terribly sorry.

-Somebody broke in, I assume?

-Yes, your uncle probably
came downstairs--

-I told him about it and he just
got back to his apartment

at 2 o'clock.

After some party at a
gallery, he says.

-There were two paintings
missing, I think.

I told them to hold everything
for you.

-Mr. Kingston, we've been
waiting to dust some of these

canvases for fingerprints.

Evans wouldn't let us touch
anything, but the frames.

-Well, that's perfectly
all right.

No problem.

As long as you're careful.

Now which ones did you want?

-These.

Right here.

-I suppose he's going to
be your new boss, hm?

-Well, I would hope he keeps
on and keeps the house.

After all, he's Mr. Matthew's
only living relative.

But, really sir, at a
time of like this--

-Oh, listen, I'm sorry.

Of course, you're absolutely
right.

Would you like to spend some
time with your wife?

I'm sure she's very upset.

-Thank you.

-Uh, Mr. Kingston, before you
get too involved there.

Excuse me a minute, Captain.

I wondered if maybe first, you'd
try to help me out with

a problem that I have.

-Yes.

-Um.

It's this.

This painting.

-Well, what's the problem?

Haven't you ever seen people
without faces before?

They've loanded them out.

You've heard of two-faced
people, I suppose.

-Oh, yes.

But, uh, you see, it's this
crazy signature that bothers

me.

-De Groat.

George De Groat.

Quite famous.

-I thought so.

Isn't that funny?

Because I noticed
the signatures

on this other painting.

Um.

Does that say, Birnbaum?

-Yes, it does.

-That's what I thought.

Birnbaum.

You'd think that these
artists would be able

to write more clearly.

-Really, do you think
all this is quite

appropriate at this time?

Mr. uh--

-Oh, I guess not.

Uh.

I realize that this may be a
terrible shock for you, and I

want to express my
deepest sympathy.

-Thank you, Mr.?

-Lieutenant Columbo.

-Ah yes, thank you.

-Uh, tell me Mr. Kingston, uh,
has anybody tried to rob this

place before?

-Certainly.

This place is a magnet
for art thieves.

One of the finest collections
in the world.

-Is that so?

-Yes.

-Really?

Very impressive.

-You seem inordinately
fascinated by these paintings.

-Well, I'll tell you
what bothers me,

you see, it's this.

If you came in here to grab some
paintings, wouldn't you

grab a De Groat first instead
of a Birnbaum?

-Perhaps.

But then I'm an art critic.

You're the detective.

-You're the art critic,
that's right.

And I'm gonna need a lot of
your help, I suppose you

noticed that already.

Uh, like in there, uh
there's two little

frames and they're empty.

And there doesn't seem
to be anything

around that fits inside.

-Oh, no!

-Now, Mr. Evans wasn't
quite sure either.

He thought that one of 'em had
some dancing girls, but I

don't think he knows much
about art either.

Uh, he also said, that
a lot of these things

have just been re-hung.

That they had just come back
from some kind of a traveling

exhibit.

-Yes, that's what those
crates are.

Out in the hall there.

I unpacked most of
them myself.

-Yeah, you know, I noticed that
a piece of that wrapping

paper had been torn loose.

-These two are listed in
the exhibit catalogue.

I've got that in
here somewhere.

Here, look.

-Those were the two
that were taken?

-Yes.

-Hey, they're beautiful.

DALE (OFFSCREEN): They're
two of my favorites.

Degas pastels.

-Pastels?

You mean like the kids
use in school?

-Nobody ever used pastels
like Degas, Lieutenant.

These two alone together happen
to be worth over a half

million dollars.

-[whistles]

You know, that's funny, too.

DALE (OFFSCREEN): Not at all.

There wasn't a painting in this
entire exhibit that's

worth under $50,000.

-No, I mean that out there,
somebody picked

the Birnbaum first.

Then when you're uncle
interfered, then when he went

to his desk and took out a gun,
then when he was killed,

in the middle of all that, then,
the thief suddenly got

smart and he took two of the
most valuable paintings in

house and he ran.

-I guess that does seem a bit
inconsistent, doesn't it?

Then life has its own
inconsistencies.

-Uh, Lieutenant Columbo?

-Oh, Sally, nice
of you to come.

Let's go back.

I want to try something.

Uh, Mr. Kingston, you might
be interested in this.

Uh, you were here?

-Yeah, that's right.

-Wait, there.

I'll holler.

-All right.

-Hi.

-Hi.

Hi, Josh.

-What's all this?

-Well, you see, they have
private patrolmen here to make

checks at every hour
at 11 o'clock--

-No, no, no.

I mean this.

This, this, this.

-Oh, the lock?

-Yes.

-Well, you see, he
found that open.

And the lock was scarred,
like it's been

forced from the outside.

Of course, what I don't
understand is, why the burglar

alarm didn't go off.

-Well, a professional thief
could manage that pretty well,

couldn't he?

-No no, no.

You see, professionals, they
always pick windows.

They're just easier to crack.

Sally, are you ready?

-Whenever you are.

-OK, when I holler inside,
you run just the way

I told you to run.

(SHOUTING) OK, here she goes!

Well?

GUARD (OFFSCREEN): That's it!

That's what I heard.

I couldn't be sure before.

I was running myself.

-Now you heard high heels
on those stone steps?

-Yes, sir.

-Thank you very much.

-You bet.

-Charlie?

Would you get Sally?

-Wait a minute.

You mean, you think the
thief was a woman?

-One of them.

-One of them?

-Well, there were too many
pictures there for one person

to carry, don't you think?

And besides, the burglar alarm
thing, you know there's only

one way to really beat that.

Is if you have somebody else
from the inside open the door.

-I don't think I understand.

-You know what?

That's the trouble.

Either do I.

-Well, if you ever want to
know anymore about art,

Lieutenant.

-Oh, thank you very much.

Listen, now that you mention
it, tell me this.

How does a thief get rid of
a painting like that?

I mean, if they're that
famous, how can

anybody sell it.

-Well, they, someone in a
foreign country, maybe.

A lot of thieves, use usually
try to make a deal of some

kind with the owner, the
gallery, the insurance

company.

-You see, that's
what I thought.

It's just like a kidnapping.

-Hm.

-In other words, what they want,
really, is the ransom.

-Exactly.

-Right.

So, you know, in this case,
somebody must be pretty scared

right now, don't you think?

I'd be anxious to
settle quick.

-Possibly.

-Sure, you know, and since
you're the first person they

might try to contact, tell you
what, you give me your

telephone number and I'll put a
tap on your phone and we'll

monitor all your calls.

You wouldn't mind
that, would you?

-Of course not, why should I?

-Gee, thank you very much.

-Good night.

-Night.

[phone ringing]

[doorbell]

-Ugh.

Look out!

-Gee, I'm sorry.

-Oh, that's all right, I've
been bumping into things

myself today.

A little bit too much of
the grape last night.

I didn't clear out of
here til 3:00 AM.

-Mr. Kingston went home a little
earlier than that, I

guess.

-Well, he stayed long enough
to make every other gallery

owner on the street
green with envy.

Of course, you know Dale, he's
usually in London or Paris.

He doesn't fool around
with us peasants.

-I'll tell you what I
really wanna know--

what time he got here.

-Yes, I know, I know.

Uh, Sam is right
through there.

Uh, I called the parking boy,
he'll be over in a minute.

Uh, Sam?

This is the policeman
who phoned.

Is it all right?

-Uh, bring him in.

They interrupted Rembrandt,
why shouldn't

they interrupt me?

Yeah, what is it?

-Uh, if I'm interrupting
something--

-No, you're not interrupting
anything.

Uh, forgive the mood, but, uh,
you caught me in a bad day.

This here is Chris.

-Oh, hi.

-Hello.

Are you an artist?

-No.

I can come back another time.

I can--

-No, go ahead and interrupt.

I'm here under duress.

-(SARCASTICALLY) Thanks a lot.

-Stop moving!

I'm trying to paint you.

-Well, paint!

-Well, actually, it's
very routine.

It's not that important--

-Well, me and champagne
are not routine.

And if you're interested in
finding out about Mr.

Kingston, what time he got
here, I don't know.

Uhh, there was something about
his watch, but I'm not sure.

-Might help if you
try to remember.

-Oh, yeah, well.

Uh.

There was something wrong
with his watch.

Yeah, that's it.

And uh, and he asked me
what time it was.

That's it.

-That's it.

I see.

Well, thanks.

Sorry to bother you.

-No bother.

I'm in my commercial
phase right now.

-Yeah, Sam's just mad at the
whole world, that's all.

That's because I made him put
her in his pretty pink cactus.

Can you imagine he
thinks the artist

should decide what they--

JOE (OFFSCREEN): Mitilda,
are you looking for me?

-Oh, one minute.

-Well, listen, I'll let
you finish your work.

Excuse me.

-Do come back soon.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Stop moving!

-All right.

-Hey, Joe, didn't the other
boys tell me you parked

Kingston's car last night?

-Sure, I remember.

The guy who gave me two bucks.

-Two bucks?

Just for parking a car?

-No, he lost a cufflink.

Uh, I helped him search
the whole car for it.

Trunk and everything.

-Did you find it?

JOE (OFFSCREEN): No, why?

-Well, you know most people's
trunks they're kinda

messy to look into?

-His wasn't.

Nothing but a spare tire
and a topcoat.

Nothing else in the whole car.

-What time was that?

Would you know?

-Oh, sure, 'cause he asked me.

Uh, something was wrong with
his watch, I guess.

It was five minutes
to 11, sir.

-Mm.

Thanks.

All right, that's it.

-Now, uh, what is
this all about?

Because, like, uh, Dale's uncle
was murdered sometime

last night, right?

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

When I think, what this is going
to do to the art world.

Can you imagine an art critic
inheriting that gorgeous

collection?

-Hey, hey, would you
look at that?

A blue horse.

-Painting the ladies and
gentlemen of the Spanish court

with a savage brush.

Relentlessly, unremittingly
showing them in every detail,

down to the tiniest wart.

But when you take the W
off of wart, you are

still left with art.

And Goya was the penultimate
artist.

We will continue our discussion
of this fascinating

artist tomorrow.

Copies of today's lecture may be
obtained for a nominal fee

by writing to this station.

This is Dale Kingston.

Good afternoon.

ANNOUNCER: Be with us again
tomorrow when Channel 16

brings you "Dale Kingston's
World of Art."

brings you "Dale Kingston's
World of Art."

[phone ringing]

-Studio 2.

Yeah, we just broke,
I'll call him.

Telephone call, Mr. Kingston.

-Thank you, Phil.

Phil?

Listen, while I've got you,
can we manage to get--

is that on?

Phil, can't you cut that camera
off me the minute I

finish talking?

Please?

I'm always left with
egg on my face.

Thank you.

Yes?

-Dale, I finally got you!

I remembered you'd be
doing your show.

-What are you doing calling?

I told you not to call
for a whole week

-I know, but I was worried.

-That's just free floating
anxiety, dear.

Now relax.

Everything's going just--

I'm terribly sorry.

No, I, I, simply don't
have time.

Well, Lieutenant.

-Gee, I wish you wouldn't hang
up like that, Mr. Kingston.

I mean somebody you don't
know tries to call you.

-Lieutenant, I get a dozen calls
a day just like that.

From would-be artists, from
ladies who want to evaluate

some stupid little print their
maiden aunts left them in

their attic.

If I paid attention to
every one of them--

-You mean that was a woman?

-Yes.

And it wasn't any
ransom call, if

that's what you're thinking.

And now if you'll excuse me, I
have a museum to go to, then a

dinner, then a lecture.

-Well, I was hoping that
we could have a

little time to talk.

We can get together later,
if you like.

-[sighs]

No, I've gotta take my
makeup off anyway.

May as well do it now.

Follow me.

-Fine, thank you very much.

Uh.

So this is a television
studio, huh?

-Yes.

-It's quite a place.

-Well, it's a barn, really.

I'm sure it's not as glamorous
as you thought it'd be.

-That's right, it isn't.

Uh, but things aren't
really what they

seem to be, are they?

-My, how observant you are.

Hildy, my beauty, how fast do
you think we can get this

paint off me?

-I'll use high-speed
turpentine.

-Well, anyway.

I'm sorry to bother
you here, but you

haven't been home much.

That's too bad, in a way.

That tap on your phone, it's
not helping us any.

-I'm not your only possibility,
Lieutenant.

I don't know whether you
know this, but my

uncle was married once.

In fact, his ex-wife still lists
herself in the telephone

book under her married name.

So you see, whoever took those
paintings could very well be

trying to contact her.

-You know, somebody mentioned
that, so I saw Mrs. Matthews

this morning.

We're watching her phone, too.

-Oh, that must have been
some interview.

Aunt Edna can be a bit trying.

-I thought she was
kind of nice.

-Oh, she's very nice,
but, uh, trying.

Well, you said you had
some questions you

wanted to ask me?

-Yeah, nothing important.

Just a few details.

Like that back door thing.

That really bothers me.

-Why?

What about it?

-Umm.

Does that coffee machine work?

-Yes, of course it does.

What about it?

-Well, you know the lab says
that there was just no way for

that lock to be forced
from the outside.

-Thank you.

So?

-Would you like a coffee?

-No thanks.

-Well, how did anyone get in?

You see, Evans is positive that
all the doors were locked

when he left the
house earlier.

And I don't see your uncle
letting anyone in,

unless he knew 'em.

-Did you come all this way
just to tell me that?

-Well, I thought you'd
be interested.

Like I did clear up
one routine thing.

You know that gallery
you went to?

Checked out.

Hope you don't mind.

-Well, that's your job.

And?

-The parking lot boy, he
remembered when you

got there, all right.

So that if Mr. Matthews was
killed at 11 o'clock, then you

sure didn't do it.

-Well, now isn't that
a shame, Lieutenant?

And here I am, your best and
most obvious suspect too.

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

-Aw, don't say things
like that.

Really.

You've got me you all wrong.

It's just that, I get bugged
by those little things.

Like no connection, but why
would a person look in the

trunk of a car for a
missing cufflink?

-Because I happened to toss my
topcoat in there in order to

keep it from getting stolen.

Then I noticed that the
link was missing.

-Of course.

See, I could've guessed that.

-A little while later I found
the link caught in

the lining my sleeve.

-I'm gonna tell you something.

Do you know that there is a
reasonable explanation for

everything?

If you just put your
mind to it.

Of course, sometimes these
things, they, uh, pop-up.

Like with alibis.

Do you know, in most cases,
people, they don't remember

what time it is?

They forget all that.

Like the artist fella.

He's all mixed up
about the time.

And Mrs. Matthews, she don't
even remember what time she

went to bed last night.

-Well, being sober might
help, I suppose.

-Now, with you, Mr. Kingston,
it's just the opposite.

Very unusual.

With you, we know exactly
where you were and when.

Not only that, we know your
whole car was empty.

-Yes, isn't that nice?

Well, if you'll excuse me.

-Oh, listen, by the way, can
I show you something?

-Yes, of course.

-It's only going to
take a second.

Uh.

You can rent paintings,
did you know that?

-Yes, I know.

-And my father-in-law, he loves
Western movies, so I

figured, a few bucks,
you can't get hurt.

Uh.

What do you think?

Any good?

-For a wallpaper in
a child's room?

Absolutely perfect.

In fact, it looks like it might
have been done by an

untalented 12 year old.

-You know, I was kind of afraid
you were going to say

something like that.

But, you know, then I say, why
would you bother to go there

last night if this guy's
stuff is so bad?

I mean this was painted by the
artist whose exhibit you were

covering.

-Lieutenant Columbo, unlike
my uncle, I am not

independently wealthy.

I have to work for a living.

Magazines pay me
to review art.

Unfortunately, they pay me
best when I write hostile

reviews about hacks likes
Sam Franklin.

-Oh.

Well, I tell you, I sure
hate to see his review

when you write it.

Oh, listen, one more thing.

And, it just, it'll just
take a second.

I stopped by your apartment
a few times.

-Why?

Do you want to search
my place?

-No.

Just to ask you something
about art.

You said you had some books
and things there

that I could see.

-You may look at anything
you wish.

You can snoop in all
of my closets.

You could peek under the beds.

You won't find any
stolen paintings.

-Oh, really I've never said
anything like that.

-Here.

Would you like the key
to my apartment?

You may simply leave it on
the mat when you leave.

-No, really.

-No, no, no.

Go ahead.

I insist.

See what I live like.

Find out what kind of
human being I am.

Learn everything you
can about me.

-Well, I, I mean, I admit it
would be more convenient, but,

uh, thank you very much,
Mr. Kingston.

Uh, I'm sorry I took up
so much your time.

I might drop by and borrow
a few books or

something like that.

See ya.

-Dale!

-You all right?

-Aw, yeah.

I'm sorry I called you.

Well, I just couldn't wait.

I had to know what
was happening.

-Nothing's happening.

No problems at all.

Everything's just perfect.

Uh.

The gun and the paintings?

Still in your car, right?

-Oh, yeah.

I did exactly what
you told me.

I haven't touched a thing.

-Good.

You'll feel a lot better once
you get those off your hands.

Hold that open for me.

-Dale!

-What's the matter?

-Well, well, I never
saw them before.

They're beautiful.

And why can't I paint
like that?

-Patience, my dear, patience.

I told you you had talent
when you first

came to see me, remember?

It takes time to get what
you really want.

-Sometimes I think my talent
isn't what you like best about

me.

-Well, it's a combination
of things, my love.

-Dale?

You do care for me, don't you?

-After the risks you've
taken for me?

Of course, I do.

OK, let's get out of here.

-Is there anything else
you want me to do?

-Not a thing.

I'll be in touch with
you by phone.

-When will I see you again?

-Very shortly, my love.

-When will I--

[tires squeeling]

-Columbo!

-Mr. Kingston?

-What are you doing here at
this hour of the night?

-Is it night?

-Yes, it is.

-Gee, I, uh.

I must've fallen asleep here.

I came in to read these books.

Did you get your key?

I left your key under mat.

Oh, good.

You got it.

Yes, I, I was reading
these articles.

I must've--

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm terribly sorry.

I just fell asleep here.

-Look, it's quite late,
Lieutenant.

If you don't mind.

I just had a tiresome evening
at a lecture, after which I

spent some time with some
even more tiresome

people from the museum.

So, if you'll excuse me.

-Oh, of course, I'll get
out of your hair.

I'm, I'm awfully sorry
about this.

Did you pick up something
interesting?

-Uh, no.

Just some, uh, um, insipid
watercolors that these people

want me to evaluate.

-Watercolors?

-Yes.

-I was just looking
at watercolors.

Matisse.

Wonderful.

I'd love to hear what you
had to say about 'em.

Could we take just a moment?

-No, Lieutenant.

Lieutenant, please!

If you don't mind, I,
It's quite late.

I'm, I'm quite exhausted.

Some other time, please.

-Oh, I'm sorry.

Of course.

I should have realized.

[phone ringing]

-You know, I just got so caught
up in this art thing

that I--

-My phone, my phone,
Lieutenant.

-Your phone?

-My phone.

It, uh, just might be the, uh,
people about the ransom.

-Oh, by all means.

-Hello?

Yes.

Yes, he is.

Just a moment.

It's for you.

-I told them at the office
that I might stop by.

Thank you.

-That's all right.

-Yeah.

What?

Well, where was it?

Yes, I understand, but why
you calling me for?

Oh.

OK, I'll be right down.

Mm.

Listen, I'm sorry.

I gotta run.

Uh, gee.

It's always something.

You know this highway
patrolman, he

found a girl in a car.

Ran over a cliff to
Malibu Canyon.

Dead.

-You get all sorts of
cases, don't you?

-Yeah, listen, They won't
let me live, what are

you gonna to do?

I'm sorry, I, I didn't mean
to fall asleep here.

I hope I didn't trouble
you too much.

-It's all right.

-Get some rest.

COLUMBO (OFSCREEN):
Mrs. Matthews?

-Oh!

Lieutenant Columbo!

-How are you?

-I'm fine.

-Listen, Mr. Kingston and the
attorney said it was all right

if I drop by.

I hope you don't mind.

-Oh, no, of course not.

The more the merrier.

But it does seem such a shame
to hear poor Rudy this way.

All those whereases.

It won't sound like
him at all.

-Hmm, you know, lawyers always
have a way of making--

-It's like an old movie.

With all the barristers, and the
butlers, and the discarded

wives all gathering together
in the library to

hear the will read.

Oh, there, we better go!

Elevators never bothered
me until just

about two months ago.

-Really?

You know, I have a friend who
used to be afraid of flying--

-He wasn't always
a very nice man.

You know?

Just, business, business,
business.

And, and then collecting.

Oh, collecting like
some old packrat.

But how anyone could want
to kill Rudy, I--

oh, hello, Dale.

-Edna, darling.

Hello, Lieutenant.

Well, what have you got
there this time?

Uh, a pink rabbit?

-Oh this?

No, no.

Not really.

But it is something that
I wanted to show you.

-Oh, show me too!

-Edna, my dear.

-Frank.

-Dale.

And Lieutenant Columbo.

We can begin now.

Mr. Evans and his wife
are here already.

Oh, but the Lieutenant was
just going to show us--

-Nevermind.

He'll show me.

We'll join you in
a little while.

Thank you, Frank.

-I, uh, I hope you're
feeling better Edna.

-What do you think?

-It's frightful.

-That's what I figured.

But you know what?

I thought maybe you just
might recognize the

style or the signature.

-No.

Who on earth is Tracy?

-Well, do you remember the
other night when I had to

leave your place in a hurry?

-Oh, yes.

That highway patrol thing.

Some kind of an accident,
wasn't it?

-That's what it looked like,
but you see, I told them.

I said, whenever a case comes
up that has anything to do

with art or painting,
you call me.

-Now wait a minute.

You mean, it wasn't
an accident?

-Oh, yeah.

It's an accident.

I mean, that's what
it's listed as.

But anyway, you see, the dead
girl, she was some kind of an

art student.

And I thought, well,
who knows.

Maybe you knew something
about her.

Tracy O'Connor?

-[laughs]

Lieutenant, there must be over
100,000 art students in

southern California.

-Well, you see.

I remember seeing one of those
lecture schedules in your

apartment and a couple of months
ago, you gave several

lectures in the school where
this girl was enrolled.

This is what she looks like.

-Be realistic, Lieutenant.

You think I can remember
everyone who ever sat in on

one of my lectures?

I've never seen that girl
before in my life.

Why don't you stop wasting
everybody's time?

-These are all minor details.

Uh, sit down, Dale.

-Thank you, Frank.

-For their devoted service to
me for the past 10 years--

uh, why don't you make
yourself comfortable.

We've, uh, skimmed over
the preliminaries.

We're now down to the
salient points.

-Proceed as you wish,
counsellor.

-Mm.

For their devoted service to
me for the past 10 years, I

bequeath to Mr. And Mrs. Evans,
jointly, an annual

payment of $2,000.

To be paid on the first day of
each and every year in which

either one of them is
still surviving.

-Such a kind of man.

-Finally, to, uh, to my primary
heir of all previous

wills, to my nephew,
Dale Kingston.

Whom I once supported through
college and who has had the

full freedom of my home and
possessions ever since,

without thought of recompense.

I bequeath the full bulk and
remainder of my estate with

this one single exception--

to Edna Matthews, the wife whom
I mistakenly divorced 15

years ago, I bequeath my
entire art collection.

-Oh!

FRANK (OFFSCREEN): Including all
of those paintings listed

in the so-called Matthews
collection.

-Mr. Kingston.

Oh no!

FRANK (OFFSCREEN): If you
please, this will is properly

signed and witnessed as of
the 10th of last month.

Here, I, I, uh, think
you should all

take a look at these.

-Dale.

I'm sorry.

I, I, I'm really sorry.

-Aww, no.

Don't be silly, Aunt Edna.

All it means is that I'll now
be able to criticize your

collection like I used
to criticize his.

Thank you, Frank.

-Lieutenant?

-Mrs. Matthews, I
hope you don't--

this is just such a suprise.

MRS. EVANS (OFFSCREEN):
I happy for you.

I know you'll be pleased
with it.

-Well, really is a shock.

File those, would you, please?

I tried to talk Rudy out
of it, naturally.

He always intended to leave that
collection to Dale and

gave it to her.

That's why I thought you'd
like to be here.

Legally, I couldn't say
anything until--

-Oh, sure, I understand that.

It's, it's just that that was
a new will only last month?

-That's correct.

He wrote most of it himself.

Oh, he promised to let me draw
up something more detailed and

complete later on, but--

-Boy, I can't figure it, I--

you'd think the nephew would
get the paintings.

-I agree, I agree.

Mr. Matthews had disagreements
with Dale, but an art

collection like that
is big business.

To manage that requires
specialized skill, taste.

Why simply leave the whole
thing to a poor unstable

creature like Edna.

Those comments are hardly
professional of me, are they?

-One thing though, if Mr.
Kingston doesn't get the

collection, he at least gets
the rest of the estate.

FRANK (OFFSCREEN):
It's meaningless.

He rented that big house.

Rudy disposed of all his
business interests.

There really isn't any remaining
estate to speak of.

-Well, listen.

Thanks for letting
me come down.

I gotta get back to work.

-Uh, Lieutenant, uh,
your painting.

-Oh, thank you very much.

-Uh, lieutenant?

My lighter.

-Oh.

Thank you.

-Mmhmm.

-Ms. Henderson, I'll make
my calls now, please.

DALE (OFFSCREEN): Looking
for me, Lieutenant?

-Oh.

Yeah, I thought I'd kind
of catch you out

in the parking lot.

-Expected to find me there
kicking my tires in

frustration, I suppose?

-Well, I thought there'd
be the normal amount of

disappointment.

-Oh, you are so transparent,
Columbo.

You had this thing all figured
out right from the start,

haven't you?

Dale Kingston hired someone
to fake the theft

and kill his uncle.

Maybe even some poor little
art student, perhaps.

-Mr. Kingston, I never
said that.

-And even though I had an
airtight alibi by total

accident, at the time of my
uncle's murder, that still

didn't stop you, did it?

-Mr. Kingston, really.

I had no idea.

-No, at this point, I'm sure
that even a compulsively

suspicious bureaucrat like
you, must have his doubts

about my guilt.

Because you heard it up there,
Mr. Columbo, you heard it in

plain English.

I do not inherit.

Edna does.

-So, that's very true, Mr.
Kingston, that's very true.

Except, um.

-Except what?

-Well, maybe you didn't
know that your

uncle changed his will.

-Oh, I was hoping
you'd say that.

Because, you see, I've known for
more than 10 days that I

couldn't possibly inherit any
part of that collection.

And since you won't
believe me, maybe

you'll believe my uncle.

Go on!

I'm sure somebody in your
department is capable of

verifying that signature.

C'mon, read it.

He sent me that letter 10
days ago telling me

about the new will.

Look at the postmark.

-So, you did know?

-Of course I knew.

Now will you please do me a
favor and stop pestering me.

And go on out and do what you
should have done in the first

place, huh?

Find the real killer.

LANDLADY (OFFSCREEN): You know,

Lieutenant, I'm not a busybody.

COLUMBO (OFSCREEN):
I never said that.

-Yeah, well.

Some landlords like
to pry into the

lives of their tenants.

But not me.

My policy is live and let live.

C'mon.

[kissing noise]

-What's bothering Walter?

He won't eat.

-Well, maybe he's not hungry.

Listen, it's not that you're
a busybody, you live here.

And you see things.

I mean, how can you live here
and not see things?

-Such as?

-Well, who goes out with who?

And who's doing what?

All those things.

This girl, Tracy O'Connor.

Who did she go out with?

Come on, tell me.

She dated, didn't she?

-Oh, of course she dated.

Oh you know, that
was a terrible

shame about that accident.

That was a very talented girl.

-Very.

-Well, you oughta know, you took
one of her paintings the

last time you were here.

-She was a very gifted girl.

-Darn right.

-Believe me.

And it was a shame about
the accident.

-Oy.

-You know why I hated to
give up the painting?

-Well, why did you give it up?

-I had to.

-What for?

-Well, that was evidence.

-Evidence for what?

-Listen, I don't want
get into that.

That's too complicated.

Walter, come here.

Come here boy.

Hey, don't, don't, don't,
don't, don't do that.

-Why not?

-Well, Walter doesn't
like strangers.

He'll bite.

-Oh will he?

Oh.

-It was an accident
wasn't it? it?

-Listen, are you going to
tell me about the men in

her life, or not?

-All right.

The men.

Now, remember, I wasn't
particularly trying to find

out about her, but I do
remember one or two.

There was an actor fella.

There were a couple of
those beach types.

-Mmhmm, mmhmm.

-And there's a kid
that played--

-You want me to tell
you the truth?

-Yeah.

-I'm interested in one
guy in particular.

-Who?

-Forty years old, well-dressed,
distinguished.

-Wait a minute.

Now, wait a minute.

Come to think of it, there was
one older gentleman she was

seeing.

-Really, can you describe him?

-Would a picture help?

-A picture?

Are ya kidding?

-Hm-mm.

-You have a picture
of this fella?

-Yeah, it's around here
someplace if I

haven't thrown it away.

It's probably in my album.

-Where did you get a
photograph of him?

-Well, I was taking some
snapshots of my, um, nephew

out at the pool.

And Tracy and her friend were
out there, so I took

one of them, too.

Now I'm sure it's
in one of these.

-You're a lifesaver.

-Well.

Let's see.

Oh, here was one.

That's when my cousins were
out here from Milwaukee.

We stocked up about those
roadside stands, you know for

date malts.

Oh, I got so sick.

But they're awful good.

You ever had one?

I think you'd like them.

Oh, there's Cindy Lou.

That's my cousin's kid.

She's um, named for me.

Look at her.

That's at Grauman's Chinese.

She's trying to fit her feet
into the, you know, the things

in the concrete.

That's awful cute, I made
her that dress.

Doesn't it look nice?

It has smocking.

-Can you see--

-Well, let's see now.

Oh, here's a whole bunch of us
that went out to the family

plot and had a picnic.

We did some weeding and
planting and we

had the best time.

We had more laughs.

Look, isn't that cute?

That's my Uncle Henry there.

-Oh.

-Oh, no wait a minute.

We must--

-Do you have any idea--

-Oh, that's a nice one, too.

Look at that.

That was taken at the zoo.

Isn't that a good
one of the lion?

-Wonderful.

Do you have any idea where
the picture was?

-Well, now wait.

Uh oh, here it is.

Here you go.

There.

Well, there he is.

That's the one.

Any help?

No kidding?

-That's not him.

-Aw, I'm sorry.

GARDENER (OFFSCREEN): You guys
still guarding this place?

-Just me.

I keep the tourists away.

Say, uh, do you know anything
about aphids?

-Aphids?

-Yeah, they're destroying
my roses.

My wife doesn't want me
to use any pesticides.

-Hmm.

-Hard spray from your garden
hose around 4:00 or 5:00 PM.

Uh, the sun's still
hot enough to dry.

And, uh, it won't burn
your flowers.

-Just water, huh?

Thanks, I'll try it.

-OK.

Hey!

Come here!

Look at this!

-Your ex-husband lived right
up there, didn't he?

-Uh, he, yes.

Right up there on the hill.

Brooding down on me like Zeus.

When we were married, I always
used to like this house.

Soon as we got divorced,
I moved in.

Demo But for years, Rudy and I
couldn't have been farther

away from each other,
if, if I'd bought a

house on the moon.

Are you sure you wouldn't
like a drink?

-Oh, no, thank you very much.

Are they real?

-Yes.

-May I?

-Oh, of course.

Help yourself.

-So, uh, what changed
all that?

I mean, how did you
and Rudy get to

seeing one another again?

-Well, we just bumped
into each other a

couple of months ago.

And, well, we were older.

And he wasn't quite
so stuffy anymore.

And maybe I don't throw things,
oh like parties and

handsome Italians
quite so much.

-Uh, ma'am, I know you're
in a hurry,

you want to go shopping.

But I wondered first, if
we could talk about--

-But, you want to know about
that will thing, of course.

I don't blame you.

Uh, uh, but, but it, don't
misunderstand.

Rudy and I weren't, uh, starting
to sing September

songs or anything like that.

But--

well, you see, years ago, I used
to think I was artistic.

And I literally dragged him
into his first museum.

And that's how his whole
collection all began.

Because naturally, Rudy started
sensing a, a good

investment area.

And, mm, some of the paintings
I liked weren't too bad.

-But it was my understanding
that, uh, it was his nephew

who picked out all
of his paintings.

-Oh, yes, later on.

But Dale was just
in college then.

Uh, that was just about the time
when, mm, when I started

misbehaving.

And then, of course, after our
divorce, the collection became

an obsession with Rudy.

And a whole career for Dale

-So since you were in at the
beginning, Mr. Matthews last

month decided to leave the
whole collection to you.

But he didn't want
me to keep them.

You don't think that, do you?

-Well.

-Oh, dear.

I guess nobody's going
to understand.

Eh, eh, eh.

No, you, you see, poor Rudy
was finally tired of it,

that's all.

All the greedy buying, and
bidding, and hoarding.

He finally, he finally agreed
with me, that the people

should own those lovely things
instead of just collectors.

He decided to give
them all away.

To schools, museums.

Oh.

But oh dear it takes so much
time to work that out.

To decide which places
get which--

-And in the meantime, he didn't
want Dale Kingston to

get his hands on
it, is that it?

-I don't like to say that.

I was just so happy that Rudy
was finally tuning human.

[doorbell]

-Who on earth?

-Hello, Aunt Edna.

May I come in?

How are you dear?

-Oh, I didn't think you
would have even

remembered where I lived.

-Oh, of course I do.

Had a message from a
Lieutenant Columb--

oh, there you are.

What's this all about?

-Is it about the gun?

-What?

What gun?

What is all this?

-Well, I thought you'd
be interested.

About a half hour ago, a
gardener up on that hill

there, he found a
.38 revolver.

And it's the same kind as the
one that was missing from your

uncle's desk.

Uh, may I use your phone?

-Oh, yes, of course.

Isn't that silly?

Right up above my house.

Well, I've walked on
that hill myself.

-Ballistics?

Is this Charlie?

Lieutenant Columbo.

Charlie, I sent that
stuff over there

over a half hour ago.

Oh.

Thank you.

It's the murder gun all right.

Oh, there's nothing
to be upset about.

-But I was just telling Dale,
I, I, I go up there myself

when I want a breath of air.

Well, I even walked over to see
Rudy just the night before

he was killed.

-Aunt Edna, I don't think you
ought to say another word.

The Lieutenant may get
the wrong idea.

EDNA (OFFSCREEN): What?

Oh, but, but, surely no one
could think that I--

-Threw that gun there?

Oh no, Mrs. Matthews.

No, no, no, no, no.

No, you see, I finally figured
out what happened.

Whoever was in that house that
night, they ran out the back,

they just kept on going.

Well, naturally, they were
anxious to get rid of your

ex-husband's gun.

It could've been anybody.

-It could?

-Yes.

Absolutely, it could.

You have nothing
to worry about.

Now did you want
to go shopping?

-Well, I was planning to meet
some friends at the fashion

center, but I can do that
some other time.

-No, I want you to
go right ahead.

And I want you to forget
about all this.

Just do what my wife does.

Because when she hits a
department store she can

forget anything.

Even the fact that I'm sitting
outside waiting.

-Have a good time, Edna.

Bye!

-What are you trying
to do her?

-I'm sorry, I don't follow.

-Well, you know perfectly well
that it was a woman that ran

out of that place that night.

You said so yourself.

-Yeah sure, but not her.

-Well, I hope you really
mean that, Lieutenant.

That you're not just playing
some kind of a game with her.

-A game?

-Yes, you know what I mean.

Lulling her into a false
sense of security.

Edna's a very vulnerable
person.

-Mr. Kingston, you've got
me all wrong, really.

I wouldn't think of
a thing like that.

That lady wouldn't hurt a fly.

MALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN):
Lieutenant?

Can you come around
here for a minute?

You told me not to bother
you until she'd gone.

-What is it?

-Well, we found something
else.

She's got some trash
cans back here.

-Rudy Matthews, 417 Pine View.

-Looks like that piece of
wrapping paper that was torn

from the rest of it
in his house.

Remember?

We figured the thief used it.

-All right, you better get that
down for fingerprinting

in comparison with
the other papers.

Is there anything else?

-No, we've covered every
inch of the grounds.

-Be careful with that.

-Now what?

-I don't know.

-I know what you're thinking,
Lieutenant.

A gun and now this
new evidence.

Looks pretty bad for her.

-Yes, it does.

Yes.

-I'm still convinced that
Edna had absolutely

nothing to do with this.

-You know, I think
I agree with you.

Look at it this way, If she's
really guilty, she's not going

to put that paper in her
garbage can, is she?

I mean, she's probably
going to burn it in a

fireplace or something.

-Yes, exactly.

That's the point.

-And you know something
else, Mr. Kingston?

You're absolutely
right about her.

She's a, what did you
call her before?

Vulnerable?

-Yes.

-She's a vulnerable woman.

And I'm afraid that
if I press her too

hard she'll fall apart.

-Oh, yes.

-And I sure don't want to
make the same mistake

that I made with you.

No, sir.

What I'm going to do is this.

I'm going to sit on everything
until those stolen

paintings show up.

-I see.

-I mean, that's the best way to
handle it, don't you think?

-Yes, yes, of course.

-I mean, I don't want to go
around pointing my finger at

anyone until I have
an airtight case.

Right?

-Right.

Uh, Lieutenant, uh your own man
said that you'd, uh, you'd

covered every, uh, every
inch of the place.

Did that include the inside
of the house?

-Well, she gave us permission,
but I didn't

want to bother her.

-Well, don't you think
you should?

I mean for her protection.

And when you fail to find the
paintings you can cross her

name off the list entirely.

-But that hardly seems
worth the trouble.

Neither of us think
she's guilty.

Why bother?

-Well, for her sake, so
she can be certain.

Search the house, Lieutenant.

-Nah, really, I think it's
a waste of time.

But if anything new comes
up, I'll let you know.

-Edna?

She's utterly harmless.

-Exactly, that's why we've
got to help her.

-But is there really any
danger of her arrest?

You told me yourself
the Lieutenant

doesn't think she's guilty.

-That's today, Frank.

Who knows what he'll
think tomorrow.

In case you haven't noticed,
he is a very haphazardly

individual.

-Mm.

And if he doesn't break
the case soon.

-Exactly.

He starts looking for a
scapegoat because the

pressure's building up
on him and Edna's the

most obvious candidate.

-Well, what should we do?

-Protect her.

I'm sure Rudy would have wanted
both of us to look out

for her interests.

She trusts you, Frank.

Get her in here.

Talk to her like
a Dutch uncle.

Fill her in on the situation.

-You're sure we should allow
her house to be searched?

-Absolutely, in fact, I think
you ought to recommend that we

insist on it.

And that way, we get it on the
record that nothing has been

found to incriminate her.

-All right.

Um, Ms. Henderson, get
me Mrs. Matthews.

-Oh, uh.

She's shopping at the fashion
center in Beverly Hills.

You can bring her in here right
now and clarify this

whole thing.

-Ms. Henderson, have her paged
at the, uh, fashion center.

We'll clear it up today.

-Well, there may be one
small hitch to that.

Unfortunately, Lieutenant
Columbo refuses

to search the house.

He claims it would be
a waste of time.

-Oh?

-Which merely perpetuates
Edna's anxiety.

I really wish there was
something we could do about

that man, Frank

-Well, perhaps there's, uh,
some way around him.

You really think so?

-I have a few friends
at City Hall.

Let me look into it.

-Fine, thank you.

I'll just run one little errand
and I'll be right back.

-Fine, fine.

Uh, Ms. Henderson, after I talk
to, uh, Mrs. Matthews, I

want the police department.

Dale?

Edna does have an excellent
motive.

You, uh, you don't think
there's any chance--

-Of course not.

You ought to be ashamed
of yourself, Frank.

-Yeah, sorry.

-I just don't understand
any of this.

-It's just a precautionary
measure, Aunt Edna.

Nothing more.

-But, uh, what do you want them
to search my house for?

What will they find?

-Absolutely nothing.

That's just the point.

Come

on -Frank?

-Mmhmm.

-Where, uh, where do you
want me to put these?

-Oh, oh, in there.

Anywhere.

Oh, I need a drink.

-Of course you do, darling.

So do I. Now let me
fix it for you.

Here are your keys.

Still Scotch?

-Yes.

How about you, Frank?

A drink?

-Yes, uh, on the
rocks, please.

-I'm sorry I'm going to have to
put you through this now.

But, believe me, it will
all be over soon, huh?

-Why would anyone think that
I'd want to kill Rudy?

-Nobody does.

We just want to make sure that
it stays that way, that's all.

That's why Frank is having
the police come in

and search the house.

Believe me, it's all
for the best.

-Dale, I don't even remember
what happened the night Rudy

was killed.

I get so nervous I, I take
sleeping pills sometimes.

-That's one thing
you should, ah!

-Oh!

-Oh!

Excuse me.

Let me just dry off,
I'll be right back.

-Oh, isn't that a shame?

[doorbell]

-Frank, must we go
through this?

-Edna, you would be so
much better off.

[doorbell]

-Come on, come on.

Nothing to be nervous
about now.

Go ahead.

-Mrs. Matthews?

Captain Wyler, police
department.

-Yes, um, please come in.

-Sorry, you can't go there.

-I'm a lieutenant so,
uh, do you mind?

It's OK, Ferguson, let him in.

-Hi, Captain.

-Columbo.

-Oh, hi, Mr. Kingston.

-Well, hello, Lieutenant.

-Listen, I just heard
about this.

You know, word came
down from above to

have the place searched.

I, uh--

-Is that so?

-Yeah.

And I, I, I can't
understand why.

Uh, the fact is, uh, I
was kind of bypassed

when I came over here.

-Well, apparently you're just
not needed here then,

Lieutenant.

Why don't you just go home
and have your dinner?

-Oh, no I better hang around
because, uh, you know, if I

leave now, it looks bad
upstairs, you know.

Oh, hello Mrs. Matthews,
Mr. Simpson.

Gee, I hope this is not
upsetting you too Much

-Well, I'm not very
happy about my

house being torn apart.

But they advised me to do it.

-They?

Who is they?

-Mr. Kingston and I thought it
was necessary, Lieutenant.

-Oh, I see.

-It, it, it's really
very confusing.

You said you didn't suspect me
of anything, didn't you?

-Yes, I did ma'am and
I meant that.

And actually, I was opposed
to having--

-Captain Wyler?

Clear this table.

-Where'd you find those?

-Linen closet, in the hallway.

-Edna, how could you?

-Dale!

Believe me, I have no idea
how they got there.

-You better not say
another word.

-But--

-Edna, he's right.

Do you intend to charge
her formally, Captain?

-It's up to Lieutenant
Columbo.

It's his case.

-What do you mean
it's his case?

I thought he was--

-We know what you thought,
Mr. Kingston.

-Lieutenant?

-Well, I think we can
get started with the

fingerprinting.

-Let's get the kit.

-Careful there.

Be very careful.

Gee, they're something
aren't they?

Pastels, you know.

-May I ask what this is
all about Lieutenant?

-Both of them.

-Lieutenant?

-Oh, Mr. Kingston.

Uh, yes.

Just give us a moment
please, do you mind?

-We're getting a few.

-Good.

-I'd like an answer,
if you don't mind.

-Uh, well, I'd have to start
with your uncle's will.

-What about it?

-Well, you see, he pulled the
rug out from under you when he

left his collection
to Mrs. Matthews.

So you only had one thing
that you could do.

Murder him and blame
it on her.

-I hope you realize the full
import of what you're saying,

Lieutenant.

They're are witnesses here.

-You see, under the law, anyone
who criminally causes

the death of someone else can't

inherit from that person.

Is that right, Mr. Simpson?

-That's correct.

-So if Mrs. Matthews
is convicted,

you're next in line.

Everything goes to you.

That's why you planted
the gun.

And that's why you planted
the wrapping paper.

And that's why you planted
these paintings.

-Dale.

I can't believe it.

-No, but you'd like
to, wouldn't you?

Get you right off the hook.

All right Lieutenant, you claim
that I planted these

paintings, suppose
you prove it.

-Can we?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, with fingerprints.

-Sorry to disappoint
you, Lieutenant.

Fingerprints won't help
you with all.

My fingerprints are all
over those paintings.

My uncle and I unwrapped
them when they came

back from the exhibit.

I told you, didn't I?

I told you myself.

They're covered with
my prints.

-No, we're not looking
for your prints.

-What?

You remember the time that I was
in your apartment and you

came in with some paintings?

And you said that they were
watercolors and you wanted to

evaluate them?

And remember I wanted
to see them?

And you wouldn't let me?

And I even touched 'em.

-You touched them?

-Yes, my fingerprints are
on those paintings.

Now if Mrs. Matthews is
guilty, how could my

fingerprints get on paintings
that she stole?

-This is entrapment.

It's a set-up, that's all!

You, you, you touched those
paintings just now while I

wasn't looking.

You saw him do it, didn't you?

You put your prints on those
paintings while you were bent

over watching them when they
were working on it.

He touched them!

You touched--

You--

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