Original subtitles

Hi, Sheila. I'll have my usual.

I've never seen you before in my life.

I'm Jeff.

I've been coming in here every day for the last two weeks.

I joke around with Kat.

She says "What's up?" I say "Muffin."

That does sound like something I'd block out.

Oh, they're playing Max's song again. Turn it up.

Oh, it is so crazy to have a friend's song on the radio.

Other than Drake. I know Drake.

Y'all know I know Drake, right?

It's catchy, too.

But, my goodness,

the woman it's about sounds like a real zero.

You know darn well that songs about me, Mother.

But I don't mind. You know, Max is super talented,

and I'm happy to hear that song everywhere I go,

including at the fricking gynecologist.

Well, good for you,

'cause if my ex wrote a song like that about me,

I would lose my mind, and he would certainly

lose his tires and his wheels,

and maybe even his brakes.

Well, I'm very happy for Max.

Unrelated, how does one do drugs?

Uh-uh.

The hell you think you're doing?

Aw, come on, man.

You guys got the good stuff,

and I'm expecting a big crowd tonight.

You know, for Max and Zoey's...

Shut the hell up, you big M-O-R-O-N.

Max has a show tonight?

Yeah, we just didn't want you to be upset about it.

Plus, you weren't invited.

But the show is not a big deal.

It's just Louisville's biggest country station

doing a live broadcast, and we're sold out,

and they're calling the song

the biggest tailgate anthem of the summer.

Ah! Why'd you just kick me?

Well, that-that's great.

You know, I-I want Max to succeed.

Yes, we broke up.

Yes, I was hoping our 20-year friendship would survive,

but-but Max isn't there yet,

and that's okay, I am mature enough to accept that.

♪ You can walk, you can run ♪

Oh, zip it, Jeff!

And from now on, no music in here.

Welcome to Footloose!

♪ Me, oh, my, oh, my, oh, me ♪

♪ Nothin' wrong with you but I'd rather be me. ♪

♪ You can walk, you can run ♪

♪ Tell yourself I'm not the one ♪

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ Had to let you go ♪

♪ Can't you see I can't believe ♪

♪ You told the world you'd set me free ♪

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ Had to let you go ♪

♪ Saying there's the door... ♪

Thank you. Keep the change.

Appreciate it. Check it out, Randi.

Right into the wedding fund.

We're still not getting a wedding cake

shaped like your hair. Or my ass.

Whoa.

Oh, leaving early, huh?

Must be a pretty lame show.

And that song, so clearly unfair

to the person it's about.

Actually, it was too crowded.

Yeah, those guys need a much, much bigger venue.

Too crowded?

That sounds like a fire code violation.

Now I'm torn between letting Max have his big night

and fulfilling my civic duty.

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ Had to let you go ♪

♪ Saying there's the door ♪

♪ Door, door ♪

♪ Door, don't let it hit you in the ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa ♪

♪ Saying there's the door! ♪

That's my buddy!

Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you so much.

This-this whole night has been like a dream.

Oh, uh, special shout-out to Hubba Bubba

and the Morning Zoo.

Best of luck next week at the Safeway opening.

And to my high school guidance counselor

who said I'd never make it in the music business,

you can kiss my ass!

RIP, Mrs. Henderson.

Oh, that was so great,

I almost forgot I was listening to country music.

So good, even if you forgot to say

that the Middle C has the coldest beers

and hottest bartender.

It wouldn't be the same without you guys.

Also, thank you in advance for understanding

that I'm gonna have to dump y'all

when I become rich and famous.

Oh, hey, Kat.

What up, homies?

"What are you doing here?"

she says like she didn't bet Carter

that this is exactly how it was gonna go down.

Oh, that's right,

I forgot the big show was tonight.

That must be why

the fire department asked me to conduct a headcount.

Self-appointed junior marshal, so you know,

I got things going on, too.

No, I like that you're here.

This way you can see all the ladies

throwing their underwear at me.

Yeah, I'm gonna need those back.

All right, I got to get back up there.

Wait, Max, I just... I want you to know...

I'm genuinely happy for you.

Well, I guess you were right.

You crushing my heart really did help my career.

No, Max, that's not what I...

Sorry, it's so loud.

Mother, put your bra back on!

Holy mother of Wi-Fi, you've got to be kidding me.

What?

Some music influencer found out

that Max's song was about me

and she won't stop DMing me for an interview.

Well, how did she find out?

Sorry, sweetheart, she was at Max's show.

If you buy me three drinks,

you get full access to my mind or body.

It's just the way I was raised.

I'm trying to be supportive of Max,

but his song is everywhere.

This isn't healthy for you.

We need to get your mind off of all this Max stuff.

How about a girls' trip?

And if that means we have to close the café for a day,

or a week, then so be it.

That's a great idea.

We could go wine tasting,

or to a spa, or wine tasting.

Hi, can I speak to your manager?

How can I help you?

I'm Val. I'm here to see

if I can put up a flyer for our cat show,

The Louisville Pretty Kitty.

Not to be confused with the gentleman's club off I-65.

You're doing Pretty Kitty again?

I wasn't sure you would after last year's incident.

They double booked with an exotic bird show.

For the record, the cats had a great time.

Well, this is fate.

Randi, we were just talking about doing something fun.

What's more fun than a cat show?

Literally everything.

Now hold on, Randi, before you say no,

is there a bridge between here and there

we can drive off?

Come on, we can enter Martin Scatsese.

Yes, definitely.

It's fun to compete, even if you won't win.

Just like all those nations

nobody can pronounce at the Olympics.

Wait, are you saying that Martin can't take home a trophy?

No, of course not.

But yes.

Entering a premiere cat show

isn't something you do on a whim.

You spend years building a rapport with your animal,

mortgaging your boat to pay for cat training,

leaving your husband when he gets in the way.

Jokes on you. She ain't got a man.

Well, I'll leave these with you. I have to run.

My Silver Persian is getting a blowout

at the Dry Bar down the street.

That's why Fredrick cancelled on me?

Hey, since you're both here,

there's something I've been wanting to ask you.

Yes, you've gained weight.

-What? -But it's cool.

Because of Lizzo, it's okay now.

You look great.

You know, so many people starve themselves before their wedding.

I think it's nice you went the other way.

I was gonna ask you to be my groomsmen,

but now I'm rethinking the whole thing.

-Snap! Hell yeah. -Groomsmen!

Hello, stranger.

Brigitte, you made it.

Of course.

I'm not going to come all the way

to a conference in Nashville and not see you.

I mean, first I saw the toilet where Elvis died.

Allegedly. I think he's living in Cuba with Tupac.

Oh, man. Kat is not gonna like this.

-Why? -That's Max's ex-girlfriend.

They were together for like ten years.

She's from "Pa-ree."

That's French for "Paris."

I think I'm the only Black person here.

Normally I would be offended,

but right now, I just feel proud.

All these booths and not one bottle of liquor?

Does catnip get you buzzed?

No.

Hmm. I'm gonna try it.

All right, the first "cat-egory" is best of breed,

followed by the costume competition,

and then the agility course.

And you wanted to go to New Orleans.

Oh, look who's here.

That sad little stray

cleaned up so nice.

And your cat looks good, too.

Katharine is not a stray.

I only left her at the fire station

for ten minutes before I went back.

You're not getting in my head, Val.

We are winning this

because Martin is beautiful

and he's got a great "purr-sonality."

Good one.

Let me introduce you

to three-time champion, Admiral Cheswick.

These are his little ribbons,

and of course, his tiny "purr-ple" heart.

Are you kidding me? That's the exact same joke I just made.

And it wasn't funny when she said it neither.

Well, the competition starts in an hour,

so I recommend you head to the grooming station.

Oh, I actually gave him a bath this morning.

I wasn't talking about the cat.

Yeah, well the Admiral has split ends.

That's right, I went to Dry Bar

and Frederick and I were being "catty."

See what I did there, Katharine?

Thank you, Mother.

You really think we can win?

There's a lot of good-looking cats around here.

Like this one that looks like a little leopard

you can put in your purse.

Or better yet, make it into a purse.

No, Martin's got this.

He needs this win. I need this win.

It's been a crappy couple of weeks,

and nothing's gonna make me feel better

except a plastic trophy with a tiny little cat on top.

Now, come on, let's make this $500 entrance fee

not feel like a huge mistake.

It's crazy.

It just feels like yesterday

we were running around the Left Bank together.

Do you still go to that little café

with the amazing house wine and really rude waiter?

Max, it is France. That is every café.

Hey, just wanted to check

to see if you guys wanted anything else.

I'd love another.

Oh, great, when Darren comes back,

I'll let him know.

Or you could go get it.

This guy.

So why are you in town?

How long are you here? When you leaving?

I don't know.

Depends on how long Max can put up with me.

Well, you're pretty easy to put up with,

unlike some people.

Ugh, my boss.

Hello? Yes, of course I'm still at the conference.

Hey, tell your boss "soup du jour" from me.

What the hell do you think you're doing?

Nothing, I'm just catching up with an old friend.

She's not just an old friend,

she's your smoking hot ex.

I can't help it if my exes are hot. I'm hot.

You know Kat has always been weird about Brigitte.

Yeah, well, I'm not with Kat anymore,

so it doesn't matter.

I'm telling you, man, you're playing with fire,

which sounds like fun

until lighting a fart goes terribly wrong.

I am so sorry,

I have to go back to my hotel to email my boss a file.

Oh, that's too bad.

Unless, uh, you come with me?

There's a lovely bar at my hotel.

Hotel bars. What a snooze.

You know what? That sounds great. Let's go.

This is not gonna end well.

Oh, yes, it is.

They totally gonna have sex.

My name is Val Park,

and this is Admiral Cheswick.

He loves warm milk,

naps in the sun

and America.

Bring our troops home.

Smart, the patriot angle.

Brings me back to Fleet Week, 1974.

By the time it was over,

those boys were thanking me for my service.

Okay, that's it. I'm starting a podcast

and you're my only guest.

I'm Kat Silver,

and this is director of Taxi Driver, Martin Scatsese.

And there's just one thing I want to know:

"You meowin' at me? You meowin' at me?"

Ooh, this place is nice.

I am definitely stealing a robe from here.

What is going on?

There is no wine in here. Is this a room for children?

And if so, where is the children's wine?

Oh, it's here.

See? It's can-bernet.

I bet you didn't know

Lubbock had a wine region.

To old friends.

And new beginnings.

You know what goes great with, uh...

let's call it wine.

Well, I hope it's wasabi peas or gummy bears

'cause that's what we got.

I was thinking more like a bath.

Oh. Hmm.

Rub-a-dub-dub, two friends in a...

You know what? Yes, the answer is yes.

I'll go get it started.

Uh, I hope you like it hot.

Actually, my feet

are weirdly temperature sensitive, so...

You know what? Yes, the answer is yes.

All right.

Housekeeping.

Oh, good, somebody forgot to put a robe in here.

-Ha, not really housekeeping. -What are you doing?

I'm trying to stop you from making a big mistake.

Do you know what Brigitte is doing right now?

Running a bath. A bath.

It's clean and dirty.

Come on, man, there's a lot of ladies

in Louisville that you can get with.

You're tall, you're muscular,

your eyes are the color of the ocean.

-You know, when you laugh... -Carter, did you come here

to ask me to prom?

I'm just saying, you can get with anyone.

Why Brigitte?

Kat will never talk to you again

and that'll blow up our friend group.

It'll break my heart

if Randi won't let me play with you anymore.

How is this my fault? Kat dumped me.

Yeah, and that sucks, but she did it

because she thought that's what was best for you.

If you're really being honest with yourself,

you're just doing this to hurt Kat.

That's not true. Did you not hear the thing about the bath?

-Now, come on. -Okay, okay.

All right, all right. You know what?

I didn't want to have to do this.

Huh?

You just handcuffed yourself to the outside of the door.

-What? -Yeah.

Wait, hold on, wait, wait. Aw.

Damn, what'd I do with that key?

I am so nervous.

Now I know how my mother felt

when she entered me into Little Miss Louisville.

For my talent, I made a perfect dirty martini.

For Little Miss Detroit,

you just had to rebuild a transmission.

I just found out the Admiral's in the lead,

but Martin's a close second.

Oh, and Mr. Big Stuff

has been disqualified for performance enhancing drugs.

You're welcome.

I guess it all comes down to the agility course.

Marty, I want you to know that no matter what happens,

I will still love you.

But if you lose, you're riding home in the trunk,

just like I did after Little Miss Louisville.

It was a different time.

Last chance to quit.

You can still walk out of here with your dignity.

Though I guess you would've had to walk in here

with dignity first.

Please, I haven't worried about my dignity

since I got food poisoning on a trapeze at Sandals Jamaica.

On your marks,

get set, go.

Admiral, full speed ahead.

Come on, Marty. Action. Action.

Come on.

Come on, do it for Mama. Come on.

Come on. Yeah, that's it. Keep going.

Yeah, you're riding home in the front seat tonight, baby.

Screw it.

-What are you doing? -Winning.

The hell you are.

This has taken a strange turn.

Or the catnip is kicking in.

Whatever it is, I'm here for it.

Scratch her eyeballs out!

Security to the agility course.

Yeah, that's right, Kat!

Show her you're a better cat

than that other crazy-ass bitch!

Oh, Katharine, you're gonna win your first pageant.

Go, girl!

Doesn't this feel better than those stupid degrees?

♪ ♪

We did it!

Looks like you got divorced for nothing, Val!

You and the Admiral can kiss my... Aah!

Oh, what the hell is Egyptian cotton?

It's like I'm wearing a baby seal.

I'm going to call down for some proper champagne.

We French did not surrender in seven wars

for me to drink wine from a can.

Great, I'll meet you in the bath.

Takes me a while to get my feet in.

You should totally steal that robe.

Kat?

Oh, I'm imaginary Kat.

Everything you love about real Kat,

with the added bonus of being awesome at the robot.

Mm, that's exactly how you always do it.

Oh, guess that means real Kat is awesome at the robot, too.

Okay, I know why you're here.

Listen, I have every right to hook up with Brigitte.

With her enthusiastic consent, of course.

Wow, you really are in my head.

No, you do you.

Or in this case, I guess, Brigitte.

I don't have an eggplant emoji, but I do have this.

Wow. You know, imaginary Kat is really da bomb.

You are such a dork.

I am not.

Really? 'Cause the first time

I met you in college, you put a Slip 'N Slide

in the dorm hallway.

It was an excellent way to raise awareness

about the dangers of drinking and walking.

And I got a concussion.

Well, in hindsight, I guess I shouldn't have

ended it at the top of the stairs.

You did catch sweet air though.

And then you stayed up with me all night.

I had to make sure you didn't fall asleep.

Your cymbals made sure of that.

Third chair. Whatevs.

Yeah, we had so much fun over the years.

What the hell?

You would not believe what I have in this bathtub.

I've never known anyone like you.

Max, do you want anything

other than champagne?

No, I'm good.

Kat?

Kat?

Ow! What are we, lobsters?

You're not in the bath yet?

Have you talked to a doctor about your feet?

I'm sorry, I got to go.

What? Why?

I can't do this.

Take care.

But before I leave, I just need you to know.

You have to steal your robe.

Oh, my God.

I knew you'd do the right thing, bro.

Hey, where you going?

Hey, can you get the handcuff key out of my car?

And I was like, "Boom, in your face, Val.

You mess with the Kat, you get the claws."

You said that to her?

It was pretty heavily implied

by the way I held the door open for her as she left.

-Hey, ladies. -Hey.

Kat, can we talk?

Anything you want to say to me,

you can say in front of my posse. Word.

Nope.

Come on, Sheila, let's give them some space.

I wanted to watch.

Well, that's what the window is for.

Hey, what's up?

The radio station wants me and Zoey

to do another show next week.

So we're gonna have to write a second song.

Or hope that Hubba Bubba's listeners are high enough

that they don't remember the first one.

That's great.

Yeah, thanks.

And, um,

I was thinking it might be nice if you came.

Oh, you-you don't have to do that.

I know. It's just...

I think it's gonna be a really good show and...

I miss my friend.

I miss you, too.

-Ow, ow, ow. -What?

-Cat show injury. -What?

I cracked a rib beating the Admiral,

and now I'm banned from Pretty Kitty.

And that's why I miss my friend.

♪ Man, I'm tired of putting out your fires ♪

♪ You're hot enough to burn it down ♪

♪ We were gold, now we're just cold ♪

♪ I'm sick of always burning out ♪

♪ When I walk away ♪

♪ Tell me who's to blame ♪

♪ I know you're gonna say ♪

♪ It's just another he said, she said thing ♪

♪ You can walk, you can run ♪

♪ Tell yourself I'm not the one ♪

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ Had to let you go ♪

♪ Can't you see I can't believe ♪

♪ You told the world you'd set me free ♪

♪ But we both know ♪

♪ Had to let you go. ♪

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