All language subtitles for Here We Go s01e02 Amys Job Interview.eng

Amy, come on.

Oh, my god.
Oh, for god's sake.

See you in a bit, ok?
Ok. Good luck.

Ok. We'll be back as soon as
we can then.

Argh, argh, argh.

Oh. Paul, what's happened?

My quads. My quads have seized up...

Oh, here we go.
..From sitting in the backseat.

Oh, lord, oh, paolo.
I blame myself.

Any idea when they'll seize down?

Which ones are quads again?

Legs, mum, front legs.
The things I'm currently rubbing.

Ah, these ones sue. These ones.

And what about your bottom?

Mum. Can you be quieter, please?

Not from back here, no.

Sam: We're going to be late, mum.

Yes. Thank you, Sam.

Just don't worry. I'll get it, rach,
don't worry. I'll get him inside.

How's your bottom, Paul?

Oh. Mum, it's five to four. Mum.

Yes, thank you.
Thank you for your help, Amy.

Well, what do you expect me to do?

Well, maybe not lean against
the car eating... are those crisps?

..Before your interview.
Not really. They're monster munch.

Just go. Go and get Amy her job.
Ok... ok, good luck.

I'll get him in there.
Have you got your speech?

Yeah, it's in my jacket pocket.
Yeah. Robin, what you doing?

Aah. Carrying you, mate,
fireman's lifting you in.

He ain't heavy,
he's my brother in law.

Do you think it's going to work?

Aaargh, ugh. No,
it's not actually.

Ooh, god. Oh, you're heavier
than you look, ain't you?

Well, no. I'm about the same as I...

Yeah, but you're dense though.
Like sort of dark matter.

Ok, good luck.
Sam: Hang on, wait for me.

Dark matter?

You still haven't answered my
question about your bottom, Paul.

It's still hurting, mum, thank you.

Come on, come on, Paul.
I'll get it. I got you,

I got you. Ooh, just take
little steps, like pingu.

Archery time!

No, that's a bit much.
That's a bit much, Sam.

Hi.

Sam: That's creepy. Um...

Do you want me to start on
the trophy?

Yeah, let's start on the tro...

What's up, archery fans?

My name is olympic Archer
Paul jessop, as you know,

and this is my paul4ar... oh.

Paul4archery channel.

Please do subscribe below.

Now today I'm talking fingers,
finger exercises,

finger health,

so this is my standard finger
workout. Warm up.

So this is my standard finger
warm-up.

We can just cut that together.

Huge part of archery,
these guys, the talons, yeah.

Really want to feel it in
the tendons.

Yeah, do you know want to fire
an arrow or something dad?

Oh, just can we...
Can you stop interrupting?

Guys, please!
I was nailing that one.

Wow, that was you nailing it,
was it?

Yeah. It's got to be more
active, dad.

This is just a bit,
you know, no offence, but boring.

Er, it... have you ever been on
the Internet, Sam?

It's mostly boring, ok?
People like it boring.

Do you know what the most popular
thing on the Internet is?

People taking photos
of their own face.

That's how boring it is. Please!
Please, love! Yeah, I know dad.

I'm 15. You don't need to mansplain
the Internet to me.

Well, I'm not, and you're also
a man, so I can't mansplain to another man.

The finger thing is quite boring,
hon, and creepy.

Can we all stop back-seat driving
my YouTube channel, please?

It's niche, sure, but that's how
online influencing works.

You... you get everyone who's
into a niche thing together,

ok, be it archery or...

Teabagging.

Oh, no, I'm sorry. It's not right.

Why don't people get real
jobs any more?

Actually, yes. Um, where's Amy?

I'm meant to be helping her
with some job applications.

Er, she's gone for a walk.

A what? A walk? Amy
doesn't walk, does she?

I mean, she can.

I'll tell you, Paul,
when I was growing up,

people had proper jobs,
you know, like butcher, baker.

Or candlestick maker.
I know, sue, but times change.

We can no longer consult
nursery rhymes

for effective careers advice, sadly.
Doorbell rings

oh, good. Finally.

Well, our ancestors were
all lumpers.

What? What are lumpers?

You know, stevedores.

What the hell are you talking about?

Oh, that's tight.

That is tight. Oh, Robin, Dean,
cherry, hi. Hi.

All right, Rachel? Looking good.

Like a jedi or something.
Thank you. Why are you in, erm...?

Yeah, we've been cycling.
Me and Dean have, not cherry.

Oh, right.

I prefer cars.

All right, paolo. Got your milk.

Yeah...

Hiya, sue.
Oh, new hip in yet, is it?

Erm, three weeks' time.

Oh! Oh, my god, Robin.

Why are your clothes so tight?

Cycling gear, so it's lycra.

That's illegal, isn't it?
Laughter

I know.

I have told him.
I can see all his bits.

Dean: The three amigos!

Sue: Yeah, it's like a
boil-in-the-bag.

Stop looking at it.
Sam, could you...

Don't film down there.

It's all sweaty and all.

No, nonsense, mate. You film what
you like, brother.

I've got nothing to hide.

They whoop and cheer

no, I'm not being rude,
but you're here. Why are you here?

Oh, yeah, sorry, just we're in
the middle of a 25k river trail

around the corner, and I realised
I needed a little pit stop.

Shit stop.

Hey! Only number one. Ok...

But, yeah, I do, so I thought i'd,
er... ah, come and do it here.

Yeah, fantastic. Go for it.

You can actually do it in the lycra
if you have to.

It won't go anywhere cos it's sort
of vacuum-packed,

just, like, sloshes around or
whatever. Oh.

Sue: So you're not cycling then,
Cheryl?

No. I'm following in the suzuki. Ah.

Yeah, cherry's in the support
vehicle, sue.

It's so bloody slow. Well...

I keep getting honked.

And bored.

Yeah, but it's nice to do stuff
together, though, babe.

I go salsa with you,
you come training with me.

I'm not with you, though, am I?

I'm in the car, watching
your little bum pumping away.

It's rubbish. Sounds all right!

Paul: So, how long you been
cycling, Robin?

Since the dawn of time, mate.

No, just the last couple of years.

But I tell you what - feel
these calves.

Honestly, they're absolute cows,
aren't they, babe?

Yeah, in a bad way.

He's had to Chuck out the skinny
jeans that I got him.

Oh... that's a shame. Wow. Yeah?

Ok... this is weird. There you are.

Meant to be doing these
application forms.

Yeah, I know. That's why I went out.
I very much don't want to.

Great! I'm so glad I'm going to be
late for work

to give you pro bono careers advice.

Have to find another time.

All right, gorgeous?

Really? I'm 19.

Heh, I'm still waiting for the bad
news!

I'm gay. That do it?

Yep. That'll do, yeah.

Is that my old t-shirt?

So? You don't wear it any more.

Well, can you please ask me
before stealing my stuff, please?

Oh, my god. I should shave 'em,
really. Actually, Paul, I've got

your dad's old bike in the shed
from the '60s.

Oh, aye, the '60s?

What is it, a penny farthing?
Laughter

no, it's a proper racer. A falcon.

Oh...

Falcon? Falcons are quality, mate.

Yeah.

Well, my les absolutely loved
it until his piles came through

and then he had to stop.

"Came through"? Piles aren't like
teeth, sue.

Er, les's were. He could have
eaten an apple with them.

So, which bike's yours, then, Robin?
Yeah, the green one.

I'll show you the green machine. The
snot-mobile. The old snot-mobile.

Amy! Can you not leave your
coats lying around, please?

Wow, you guys aren't mucking about.
Lean and green.

I might have to, er... might have to
come out with you one of these days.

Oh, yes, paolo!
That's fightin' talk, innit?

Join the peloton, brother.
I can... I can cycle.

Strap on the stabilisers
and off we go!

I got rid of them when I was eight,
mate, so, er...

Eight? That's a bit late, innit?
Is it? That is late, yeah.

Ok, ok, Amy.

Ok, come on.

We're late.

Oh, Amy, you're covered in whatever
monster munch is made out of.

I can't believe it's potato.

Can someone grab my Walker
from the back, please?

Oh... mum, quick.

Rachel! Rach!

You'll have to catch us up, sue!

Hello. Sorry. Hi.

We've got an appointment
with Kim sinclair at four o'clock.

Yeah, sorry, we're a little late,
er... stuck in traffic.

What's the name?
Both: Amy jessop.

She's Amy jessop, yes.
I'm her mother.

And also, erm, an old friend of
Kim's.

School friend.

So I thought maybe we could hang
around and...

Well, no waiting.

Well, no, we'll be really quiet.
You won't know we're here.

Help me, Rachel!

Oh...

Me Walker's stuck in the door!
Help me! Oh, god. Yeah...

Now, the saddle is very firm. Mm.

Mm-hm. Good.

Good. Firm's good. Firm but fair.
Phone chimes

erm... we...

Ooh! Ooh, yes!

Yeah! I've got one more subscriber
to my paul4archery channel.

Grr! That is great news.

Sam: Yeah, proper influencers tend

not to celebrate them
individually, dad.

Paul: Huh?

Yeah, and the bell, the bell still
works. Look.

Sam: Maybe you could use the bike
on your channel, dad, instead

of those really boring
finger exercises?

Paul: Yeah, that's a good idea.

You know, a whole-body
fitness video. Yeah.

Maximise my subscriber reach.

Well, it would be good to break
into double figures, certainly.

Well, I've actually got 14,
so there.

Yeah, either way, can you stop
dinging your bell, please?

We're meant to be doing
Amy's mock job interview. All right.

Can I finish my cereal first?

No, I've been waiting 40 minutes as
it is. We're doing it right now.

Amy, cereal?

It's 2pm.

So? You don't have to eat
cereal at breakfast, granny.

You can have it whenever you want.

Well, that's PC gone mad.

Erm...

No, it isn't, but...

Ready? Yeah?

Can you tell Sam not to film it?

Well, they might film it.

Well, yes, very true.

They might film it,
so this is good practice.

Ok, so, here we go.

Is she going to be wearing that
t-shirt for the interview?

What's that?
My rage against the machine t-shirt

from the mid-'90s? Hopefully not,
no.

Why? What's wrong with it?

Well, I don't know.
Off the top of my head,

going to a job interview
with Che Guevara on your clothes

might make them question your
commitment to the role of admin

assistant and, indeed, capitalism
in general.

Oh, is that who it is? Do you know,
I thought it was frank Spencer.

What? You know, the beret.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

To be fair, you wouldn't want to
employ either of them, would you?

No, no!

No, you should be wearing a skirt,
Amy, and a blouse.

A blouse? Seriously?

Yeah, with a smart handbag
that matches your shoes.

Ok, well, we'll discuss
wardrobe later.

If we could just, please, let's
get... let's get on with it.

Ok, so, Amy...

..Tell me about yourself.

Uhh...

..I'm tall.

I'm a libra.

Mm-hm. I'm going to uni at
swansea next year... ok.

..Because my girlfriend goes there.
No, but don't... don't say that.

That makes it sound like that's
the only reason you're going.

It is. Yeah, don't tell them
you're going to swansea.

That might make them not want to
hire you.

Talk about your personality.

Right, yeah. Um...

..I'm impatient.

I get bored easily. Ok.

I'm quite lazy.

Why would you tell them that?

Cos she is lazy.

Yes, I know she is, Sam,
but don't tell them that!

Let them find that
out for themselves.

Talk about your... your skills.

Well, I can roll my tongue. Ok.

And I know the name of that really
long Welsh town, if that's useful.

Why would that be useful?
Oh, go on, then.

She clears her throat

llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrn-
drobwllllantysiliogogogoch.

Ha-ha! Well done! You should
definitely do that!

No, don't do that. Don't do that.

Amy, you've got to sell yourself,
yeah?

Talk about chess club or,
you know, learning the harp briefly.

You know, anything that sets
you apart.

It's really competitive out there.

And if you want... want sinclair
business process outsourcing

to take you seriously, then you've
got to be passionate

and dynamic and...

Sinclair? Hang on...

Oh, my god. This is
Kim sinclair's business. Yeah, and?

Oh... I know her!

I've known her for years.

Oh, my god, this is great.
You'll be a shoo-in.

Forget everything I said.

This is how people actually
get jobs in this country.

It's with contacts.
So, what, I don't need to practise

for the interview, then?
No, forget it, forget it.

Just say that you like working
in a team and you won't leave

your coat lying around,
you'll be fine. Cool. Great system.

I'm having a bath, in that case.

Ah, this is great!

Oh, my god, rach. Have you got
up to 15, have you?

Huh? I'll hang your coat up then,
Amy, shall I?

No, no, no, no.
This is not another subscriber.

This is big-boy shit.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, Paul, are you ok?

Huh? Yeah.

As in, my old school emailed,
asking me...

..To give out the awards
at the year 11 sports day.

Sam: Well, yeah, because you asked
them if you could.

Paul: Well, yeah, I offered, just
as a favour, but this is immense!

I can probably get you all
free tickets.

Sam: Tickets? To a sports day?

Paul: Yeah!

Oh, that's wonderful, Paul. I know.

And are you going to be
getting a prize, as well?

Um...

Nooo. No.

But, you know, the point is, if you
get the kids into something online,

you can very quickly go viral,

so I need to think about branded
t-shirts, you know,

big foam fingers, you know, maybe
even foam feet or something.

I don't know if you can do them. Mm.

Er, Amy jessop?

Here! Yes.

Kim. Kim, hi.

Oh. Hi. Yes?

Er...

Sorry?

Rachel.

Erm... Rachel hankey. From school.

Oh! Oh, yes.

Erm, hi. Hi.

Sorry, are you here for the
assistant job, as well, or...?

What? No. No.

Amy's my daughter. Amy jessop.

Hi. Hi.

Jessop's my married name.

Ok, ok.

And the boy with the camera
and the lady with the zimmer frame,

are they with you too or...?

Sam: We are, yeah.

Yes. Yes. Yes, we are.

Sue jessop, granny.

Very proud granny.

And I've just had my hip replaced.

Oh, no. So how are you?

How are you doing?
It's been bloody yonks.

How's Dave?

It is Dave, isn't it?

No, it's David. Right.

How is he? He's amazing,
thank you. Just so busy. Ah.

Yeah, he was made senior
consultant a few months ago.

Wow! Was he? Yeah, thanks.
Yeah, yeah.

What does your...

Are you married? Yeah.

Yeah, I am. Yeah.

My husband's a former
olympic athlete, actually.

Oh, wow!

Yeah. Which... which event?

Uh, outdoors. One of the
track and field...

Archery. It's archery, yeah.

Kim chuckles how funny.

Yeah. Yes. It's funny.

Amy's such a good girl.

You're going to love her.

Hopefully, yeah.

So, how are you?
How are your children doing?

Oh, so well, thank you.

Yes, seb is a prefect. A perfect,
I call him. Ah, perfect! Year 11.

And constance is at Yale, majoring
in political science.

Ah! So... Yale. Yeah, thanks.

Yeah, thanks. She's so driven.

I mean, far too ambitious to stay in
the UK

and get any sort of office
job or anything. Mm. Yeah. Yeah.

What about you, Rachel?
What are you doing?

I heard that you'd given up
being a careers adviser

and you set up a cafe.

Yeah, a few years back.
That's right, yeah.

Oh, well, good... good for you.

Yeah, I mean, being a careers
adviser must be horrendous and,

you know, owning your own business,
well, it's the best, isn't it?

Hmm, no, definitely, yeah.

Had to... had to close it, though,
the cafe.

Well, it's not for everyone, is it?

So, what do you do now?
Yeah, back in careers advice. Aww.

Rightly or wrongly. Not really what
I want, but... no.

..Probably need to talk to a careers
adviser myself. Probably.

Yeah, yeah.

Maybe you should apply to
be my assistant after all!

Kim chuckles

no, it is tough. It's tough. Yeah.

I mean, in some ways,
you know, we've been so lucky,

but I sort of think you make your
own luck, really, don't you? Hmm.

Erm, I've actually got a
meeting at 4:30, Amy, so...

Oh, sorry. Can we? Do you mind?

Well, she's what my mother
would have called a classic cow.

On phone: And what is it?

Yeah, it's just a boring office job,

assistant thing so...
It'll be faeces.

I don't even want it.

Sorry, guys. Can we just, erm...
Oh, whoa! Wow!

Sorry, my dad's wearing lycra.

Sam: Oh, my god.

On phone: Oh, please let me see!

Yeah, no. No, no-one should see
this.

Ok, Amy, can you put your
phone down, please?

What? Yes, please, can you?

We need to talk about something.

Yeah. All of us.

Ok, better go. I think my
parents are getting divorced.

No. No, we're not. No way.
We're not getting divorced.

Oh, great - more Christmas presents!

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Ah, very good,
Maya. Take care, take care.

Ok, bye. Bye. Can you put the
camera down, please, Sam?

All right. Come on, Sam.

Ok. Take a seat, Sam. All right.

Ok, so...

Yeah, why are you wearing lycra,
though?

Huh?

Oh, I'm going out cycling with
Robin. Yeah.

It's just to sort of make me more
aerodynamic.

You? You may be the least
aerodynamic person in the world.

Have you been using drugs?

Hmm. What?

No. Where the hell has that come
from?

I just found it, ok? Before you say
anything, I wasn't looking.

I just found it. Found what?

Drugs... ruin... lives.

Do you understand me? Yeah, there's
certainly no point applying

for a job if you're an addict, Amy.

Amy scoffs

you know, drugs will take
y-y-your...

..Your money, your time... teeth.
..Your energy. What?

Even a bit of puff can lead to blow
and then it's down the k-hole.

Before you know it,
you're smoking the dragon.

Dragon? If that's...
It's heroin, isn't it?

I'm not taking drugs, mum.

Oh, just... don't lie to us, Amy,
please. Ugh.

I could be banned for life by the
international olympic committee

for even having it in the house.

Yeah, but you don't compete any
more. If I was still competing.

I found it in your coat,
in the inside pocket, ok?

Yeah, that's... that's not mine.

Oh, come off it.

Please.

Well, it's your old coat, mum.

I've just been borrowing it.

I didn't even know it
had an inside pocket.

Is it your coat?

Well, yeah, originally...

..But what are we saying, that I put
it there in the '90s

and then I forgot all about it?

Because that's...

I mean, that's...

Yeah...

I don't even touch drugs.
They're for losers.

Well, they're... yes, they are.

Hmm, yeah... it's just hash.

It's not even that's strong.
But it's disgusting.

Well, you know, if taken
carefully with friends,

hash can be really quite fun,
actually, but I get your...

Wait, sorry - are you warning us off
drugs or suggesting we take them?

Yeah. The message.
Yes, I'm saying...

Yeah, let's throw it out.

It's probably gone off anyway.
It's been there that long.

It's wrapped in clingfilm, though...

It must have gone off.

Yeah, yeah. We could Google it.

No! No. Don't Google it.

No. Heavens, no. No.

I could be arrested.

She inhales

doorbell rings
oh, good. That's Robin.

Ok, Sam, I need you to come and film
some action footage for the channel.

Just say no!

Heavy metal music

yeah!

Paul4archery!

Hi! This is Paul jessop
from paul4archery.

Please do subscribe below.

Now, today I'm working on my
full-body fitness with some cycling.

If archery's all about the arms
and the chest, then cycling

is a great way to fill in those
fitness gaps and spend some time

with our old friends, the legs.

Let's do this.

All right, dad. Got it.

Paul gasps

laughter you all right, paolo?

The saddle. It's the saddle.

It's really, er...

I'm compromising, yeah?

I think I'm getting a callus.

Yeah, that will happen.

My arse is basically one big callus
now, to be honest.

Oh, the thighs as well.
My thighs are on fire.

Yeah. Mm. Yeah.

Argh. Tell you what, you should join
us for the old ampthill-bedford loop

we're doing on Sunday morning.
Steady on.

That'll certainly toughen up the old
buns, paolo.

I don't think he's quite ready
for that, is he? Look at him.

What? I'm ready, boy.

I was born ready.

Oh! Watch your feet.

Don't tell Rachel.

Yeah, so, er...

Heh, how long is that?

What are we talking?

It's only a...
I don't know, 45k or something?

Yeah, it's a shorty.

I'm down. Let's do it.

All right. Sweet.

Sam: God, why is it so heavy?

Have you packed an anvil or
something?

No, no. Just a few essentials.

Jigsaw, me three Jack reachers,
strepsils, me bins.

That kind of thing.

"Bins" as in binoculars?

Yeah. You'll not be doing any
bird-watching, sue,

you'll be in hospital.

Yeah, but I can ask
for a window bed.

No, that's not something you can do.

Anyway, you'll be in and out.

You're having a hip replacement,
not going on a cruise.

Well, you never know, do you?

I've made a will just in case.

Oh, can I have the car?

No! I want the car!

Granny, I should get the car.

No-one's having the car.

She's going to be absolutely fine.

Amy, get a job and you'll be
able to buy your own car.

Ugh. Thanks for helping me.

Engine revs

oh, my god!

Horn blares

man down, man down!
Everything's going to be ok.

Let's get this door open!

What do you mean, "man down"?

It's going to be ok, mate.
Oh, my god!

Don't slide him! What's happened?

Paul yelps

sue: Oh, no! Oh, me lovely Paul!

Everything's going to be ok.

It all got a bit much for paolo
and he sort of seized up,

didn't he, babe?

Yeah, and he's got a bit of
a bum bleed going on and all.

Thankfully, though, my seats
are leatherette so I can

just wipe 'em down.

Oh, are you all right, Paul?

Yeah, yeah, I'm ok.
I just took on too much, that's all.

His eyes were bigger than his legs.

And his arse, to be fair!

I could do with some savlon, though.
Has anyone got any savlon?

Oh, savlon. I've got savlon.
Sammy, in me suitcase,

I've got a big tub of it.

What do you think it was, then?

Well, yeah, it was an
incredibly long route, Rachel.

It's 45k. You stopped at 11, mate.

It'll be friction.

You know, some kind of
saddle sore on the buns.

Sue: No, it'll be piles. I know it.

Huh? Yeah. Piles? Yeah.

What? Let me see. No, don't...
It can't be, can it? Huh?

Oh, yeah, definitely piles.
I can see through the lycra.

I can see them. Really?

Hey, no! Stop it, stop it!

Stop looking! Mum, please! Can I
just get inside, please, ladies?

Well, no, we were about to take sue
to hospital for her hip operation,

so... oh, god, mum, yeah, of course.
I'm sorry, I...

Yeah, well, I think you should come
too, then they can check your

undercarriage when
they're doing my hip.

I think that's smart. That's wise.
I think that's wise.

That's all right, I just need to
stretch out my quads,

you know, and it'll be fine.

I mean, at least, I hope it's fine -

I've got that sports day on
Wednesday. Yeah, you'll be fine.

You'll be fine. Just, can you...

Sam, don't film him
when he's like this.

Dad's sports day's starting
any second, mum. Yep, thanks, Sam.

How'd it go? Didn't get it. Ok.

Oh, ok, quick.

It's already started.

Ok, and now, handing out the prizes
themselves,

I'd like you all to welcome a real
local sporting hero, an olympian

who competed for Great Britain in
the 2004 olympic games in archery.

He is the greatest athlete that
brickhill park school has ever

produced, according to his website.

Please give it up for, er...

..Paul jessop!

Applause yes!

Woo!

Paul groans

just keep on moving,
keep on moving...

Paul whimpers

yep...

He groans and whimpers

he farts

oh, my god.

I'm cool.
Applause

I'm cool, I'm cool.

I'm cool, I'm cool, I'm cool.

I'm cool.

He yelps

Jesus.

Thank you.

Weakly: Thank you.

As an elite-level sportsman...

Straining: I need to keep my mind
and body in tiptop shape.

Oh, my god, I can't watch.

I'm going to find the loo.

My new tube... my new YouTube
channel, paul4archery...

He stutters

a 4 for the word "for".

..Is a one-stop shop to hone both
your interest in archery

and your overall bodily fitnessss...

..With my regular instructional
and inspirational videos.

I'm going to have to sit down, sir.

I'm so, so sorry, everyone.

Robin, my bag. Yeah.

Let's get on the bag.

Paul grunts
ok.

Oh, no. That looks good.
Not the bow.

Er, thank you, Paul.

Thank you, everyone.

Ok, so the first award is
for the 1,500 metres,

which was won by
Sebastian sinclair-hall!

Woo! Yeah?

He's also won 800 metres.

Aww. Well done, darling!

Woo!

Woo!

Well done, darling.

Big sort of meeting you had
to get to, was it, yeah? Oh!

Hello again. Yeah.

No, I just wanted to see sebby
collect his award. Oh.

We're a very supportive family.

That's your, erm, olympian husband,
is it? Up there on the bean bag?

Er... uh-huh.

You know, Kim, I get that we might
not have been the best of friends

at school, but...
We weren't friends at all, Rachel.

You used to call me Kim shit-hair.

No... no...

That was a few of us.

And your haircut at the time
was a bit...

We hung out, though, at lunch.

Not really. No. No, you were
usually off getting stoned.

Well, even so, that's no reason
to take it out on my daughter.

Sorry, er, what do you mean?

It's a basic office job.

She could do it in her sleep.

Oh, it wasn't because of you.

No, I didn't give her the job

because she said it sounded "very
boring" and that she didn't want

to work for a - and I quote -
"massive bitch".

So, as a career adviser, you might
want to work on her attitude.

There you go. Well done.
Applause

sebby, well done! Just so proud.
We're both so proud of you.

Ok, moving on to something
won by someone else,

er, and this award going to the
600 metres swimming...

A few people questioning dad's
athletic prowess in the toilets.

What? What is it?

I'm very proud of you, you know.

What for?

Just for who you are.

Ok.

Applause

I'm never doing a
fitness video ever again.

Yeah. My body can't hack it.

Yeah, well, I've got some
good painkillers at home.

Great. Mm.

He sighs

come on, let's get out of
here as fast as we can.

Agh...

Mum!

What's that music? It's, like, 2am.

What the hell are they doing?

♪ I'll take you higher

♪ I'll take you higher
I'll take you higher

♪ I'll take you
higher and higher... ♪

Erm... hello.

You're up.

Are you smoking a joint out here?

What? No!

Just a small one.

They giggle

ah, you know. Sit down. Join us.

Join you? Are you serious?

I've got school in the morning.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Amy, then? No, no, definitely not.

Unless you want social services
to take us away.

Well, might not be bad, actually.

They laugh

Paul groans

oh, no. Oh... are you ok?

Oh, don't worry, he always does
this.

He's, er... he's pulling a whitey.

Huh? No, it's off.

It's... it's definitely gone off.

Yeah, right. Uh-huh.

Come on.

All right, fine.

It's not like I've got work to go
to.

Atta girl.

I'm going to bed.

Night, losers.

Goodnight. Love you.

Yeah.

You all right, Paul?

Yeah, he's gone.

Amy giggles

oh, god.

♪ Come and feel my energy

♪ let's be as one in soul and mind

♪ I'll fill your world with ecstasy

♪ touch all your dreams
deep down inside

♪ let me be your fantasy... ♪

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