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1
00:00:03,471 --> 00:00:05,439
Cheers is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:06,974
Hey, sam.
3
00:00:06,974 --> 00:00:07,975
Hey, woody.
4
00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:09,143
Is it all right
If I hang
5
00:00:09,143 --> 00:00:10,244
Some christmas
Decorations
In here?
6
00:00:10,244 --> 00:00:12,946
Sure.
Boy, is it that time again?
7
00:00:12,946 --> 00:00:16,517
Wow. Christmas comes earlier
Every year, doesn't it?
8
00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:19,353
Well,
No. I think if
You check, sam,
9
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:22,356
It always comes
On the 25th
Of december.
10
00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:24,392
Of course, of course.
11
00:00:24,392 --> 00:00:26,894
Thank you.
Thank you.
12
00:00:26,894 --> 00:00:29,563
Oh, look at that,
Will you?
13
00:00:29,563 --> 00:00:30,831
Nice rudolph.
14
00:00:30,831 --> 00:00:32,533
I made it myself.
15
00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:33,967
No kidding.
16
00:00:33,967 --> 00:00:36,737
You know, rudolph's
My favorite guy in
The christmas songs.
17
00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:38,005
Yeah.
18
00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,407
Apparently, then, woody,
You're unaware
19
00:00:39,407 --> 00:00:41,008
That the story of rudolph
The red-nosed reindeer
20
00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:42,176
Is one of the most
Unrealistic
21
00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:43,511
And therefore
Potentially damaging
22
00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:44,978
In all of children's music.
23
00:00:44,978 --> 00:00:47,981
It gives them
A horribly distorted
View of reality.
24
00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:50,984
Yeah, but got to
Admit it, it's
Easy to whistle.
25
00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:52,686
No, I'm serious.
26
00:00:52,686 --> 00:00:56,124
First, the other reindeer
Tease and then ostracize him,
27
00:00:56,124 --> 00:01:00,228
And then when his abnormality
Proves of service,
They use him.
28
00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:04,498
But then do they allow him
To play in their stupid
Reindeer games?
29
00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:05,899
Yes.
Yes.
30
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,601
No, no. I know
How the song goes.
31
00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:11,305
In fact, not only
Do donner, blitzen, et al
32
00:01:11,305 --> 00:01:14,308
Not love him
And laugh out with glee,
33
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:18,045
But they doubly despised
The bulbous-nosed
Little wimp.
34
00:01:18,045 --> 00:01:20,514
Well, I got to be off.
Happy holidays!
35
00:01:26,854 --> 00:01:29,323
* makin' your way
In the world today *
36
00:01:29,323 --> 00:01:32,426
* takes everything
You've got *
37
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:35,229
* takin' a break
From all your worries *
38
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:37,331
* sure would
Help a lot *
39
00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:41,702
* wouldn't you like
To get away *
40
00:01:44,272 --> 00:01:46,240
* sometimes
You wanna go *
41
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:50,178
* where everybody
Knows your name *
42
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:55,316
* and they're always
Glad you came *
43
00:01:56,384 --> 00:01:59,153
* you wanna be
Where you can see *
44
00:01:59,153 --> 00:02:01,255
* our troubles
Are all the same *
45
00:02:01,255 --> 00:02:02,490
* you wanna be *
46
00:02:02,490 --> 00:02:05,659
* where everybody
Knows your name *
47
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:09,363
* you wanna go
Where people know *
48
00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:11,932
* people are
All the same *
49
00:02:11,932 --> 00:02:13,201
* you wanna go *
50
00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:17,205
* where everybody
Knows your name **
51
00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:43,063
Prithee, friends,
What thinks thou?
52
00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:45,065
You look ridiculous.
53
00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:46,367
I beg your pardon.
54
00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:49,069
This is an absolutely
Authentic example
55
00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:52,072
Of feminine
Colonial headwear.
56
00:02:52,072 --> 00:02:53,407
I'm sorry.
57
00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:55,543
Thou lookest ridiculous.
58
00:02:58,712 --> 00:03:01,382
Hey, miss chambers,
What's the pilgrim get-up for?
59
00:03:01,382 --> 00:03:03,384
I was hoping
Somebody
Might ask.
60
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:06,186
We're going to have
To talk later, woody.
61
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:09,189
My graduate american
Literature professor,
Dr. Narsutis,
62
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:12,893
Annually recreates
The first thanksgiving
Dinner at his home.
63
00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:16,096
He only invites two or
Three favorite students
64
00:03:16,096 --> 00:03:18,399
To break bread
With his family
65
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:21,402
And other
Honored guests,
Such as william styron,
66
00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:25,339
And guess who's
Going to be there.
67
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:27,875
William styron?
68
00:03:29,777 --> 00:03:30,744
Yes, woody...
69
00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:32,446
Heck, anybody
Could have got it
70
00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:34,348
If they'd really
Been listening.
71
00:03:35,749 --> 00:03:38,886
What a wonderful
Opportunity
For you, diane.
72
00:03:38,886 --> 00:03:42,089
Perhaps in the evening
You can establish a rapport
With mr. Styron
73
00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:43,824
While passing the yams.
74
00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:47,395
Who knows, come pie time,
He may well have taken you
Under his wing
75
00:03:47,395 --> 00:03:50,331
And launched you
Into the literary galaxy.
76
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:52,666
Frasier, you and I
Are of of like mind.
77
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:55,336
Except one of us
Is kidding.
78
00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:02,610
Sam, I'd thought we'd spend
The holidays together,
79
00:04:02,610 --> 00:04:06,314
But when you made
No move in that direction,
80
00:04:06,314 --> 00:04:08,316
I made these
Alternate plans.
81
00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:10,851
I hope it won't
Spoil your holiday.
82
00:04:10,851 --> 00:04:13,487
Thank you.
No. I have other plans.
83
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:16,290
Oh, good.
I'm glad to hear that.
84
00:04:16,290 --> 00:04:20,494
And all fairness,
I will understand if you
Get an escort for the day.
85
00:04:20,494 --> 00:04:22,496
It really wouldn't
Hurt my feelings.
86
00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:25,699
Good. 'cause
I already have
A date with wendy.
87
00:04:25,699 --> 00:04:27,535
How could you?
88
00:04:27,535 --> 00:04:30,638
Now you just said that
It was ok, didn't you?
89
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:33,674
Yes.
90
00:04:35,743 --> 00:04:37,044
I'm sorry.
91
00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:38,312
It's fine.
92
00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:39,413
Enjoy.
93
00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:41,048
Thank you.
94
00:04:41,048 --> 00:04:43,684
Besides, I know
We'll have many
Holidays together
95
00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:46,320
When you and I
Are one.
96
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,589
You already are one,
Diane.
97
00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:54,728
So, what's
Everybody else doing?
98
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:57,230
I don't know.
The usual.
99
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:59,567
Well, that sounds
Like fun, too.
100
00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:04,372
Well, I'm on my own
This year.
101
00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:05,906
Kids aren't with you?
102
00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:09,109
No. They're in
Atlantic city with nick.
103
00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:12,245
This is my
First thanksgiving
Away from home,
104
00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:14,382
I mean,
Unless you count
Last year.
105
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:20,187
Wait a second.
Listen to you. Carla,
You have a new place.
106
00:05:20,187 --> 00:05:22,189
You could have
A little gathering.
107
00:05:22,189 --> 00:05:23,256
Forget it.
108
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:24,692
Oh, come on.
109
00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:26,427
What could be
More enjoyable
110
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:29,262
Than opening your heart
With holiday cheer.
111
00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:31,699
Opening yours
With a can opener?
112
00:05:33,066 --> 00:05:34,568
That sounds great.
113
00:05:34,568 --> 00:05:37,405
No, I meant
The first part,
Miss chambers.
114
00:05:38,406 --> 00:05:40,441
Well, why not?
115
00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:43,243
But it's going
To have to
Be potluck.
116
00:05:43,243 --> 00:05:45,913
Sammy, why don't you
Bring your date
And join us?
117
00:05:45,913 --> 00:05:48,115
All right,
Tell you what,
Carla.
118
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:49,417
I'm good
For dessert.
119
00:05:49,417 --> 00:05:51,084
So I've been told.
120
00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,923
I'm glad you're
All fending off
The holiday blues.
121
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:59,126
This time of year's
Filled with arguments,
122
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:00,661
Suicides, murders.
123
00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:02,596
Yeah, I guess
It's the seasonal
Happiness of others
124
00:06:02,596 --> 00:06:05,098
Throws a glaring light
On flaws
125
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:07,000
In our own
Interpersonal
Relationships.
126
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,738
But see, of course,
That's no problem for me.
I'm alone.
127
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,241
Want to join us
For some bird, frasier?
128
00:06:14,241 --> 00:06:15,676
Could I?
129
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,014
Sure. The more
The merrier.
130
00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:23,784
So, what time do you
Want us there, carla?
131
00:06:23,784 --> 00:06:26,286
What do you mean
"Us", clavin?
132
00:06:26,286 --> 00:06:27,688
Well, you know--
133
00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:31,358
This party is
For lonelies,
Not homelies.
134
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:34,127
Besides,
You'll be with
Your mother.
135
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:35,963
No, no.
Not this year.
136
00:06:35,963 --> 00:06:38,966
She's going down
And ladle out some
Cream-of-something
137
00:06:38,966 --> 00:06:40,901
To the folks down at
The rescue mission.
138
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,402
Oh, how sweet.
139
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,537
Why don't you join her?
140
00:06:43,537 --> 00:06:45,238
Are you kidding?
141
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,974
I did my part
This year.
142
00:06:46,974 --> 00:06:50,177
I was in "Hands
Across america,"
Remember?
143
00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:51,945
Ok.
144
00:06:51,945 --> 00:06:53,447
Norm, how about
You and vera?
145
00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:55,483
No, I can't make it
This year.
146
00:06:55,483 --> 00:06:57,250
Why not? I mean, we've
Never even met vera.
147
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,687
We've got to go to
Vera's mother's.
148
00:06:59,687 --> 00:07:01,755
Such a drag--
No beer,
149
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:05,493
No tv, heat
Turned up to 80.
150
00:07:06,660 --> 00:07:08,161
That's all right,
Normie.
151
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:11,499
You got to do what
Your little wifey
Wants you to do.
152
00:07:11,499 --> 00:07:13,834
You got them or you don't.
153
00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:15,569
You know something,
Cliff?
154
00:07:15,569 --> 00:07:17,137
You're
Absolutely right.
155
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,906
Eight years I've
Been going to that
Old bat's house.
156
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:20,541
I think
Vera owes me one,
All right?
157
00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:21,742
I'm going to march
In that house.
158
00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:23,443
I'm just gonna say,
"Vera...
159
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,145
"This year we're
Going to carla's
For thanksgiving.
160
00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:27,214
That's the last
I want to hear
On the subject."
161
00:07:27,214 --> 00:07:29,416
Yeah!
Good for you, norm.
162
00:07:29,416 --> 00:07:30,851
Ok, norm's out!
163
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:35,355
Count me in, all right?
You'll see.
164
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:37,791
Well...
My house noonish?
165
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,994
This is going to be
The greatest!
166
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:42,563
I'm so relieved.
167
00:07:42,563 --> 00:07:45,799
Now I don't worry
About my poor little
Thanksgiving orphans
168
00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:49,670
Whilst I sup
With the literati.
169
00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:52,205
Boy, I don't know
Who's luckier.
170
00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:55,142
You 'cause you get to go
To that great party
171
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:59,547
Or us because you get to go
To that great party.
172
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,386
[tv plays]
173
00:08:06,386 --> 00:08:07,888
Hey!
Oh!
174
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,323
And that ends
The first half.
175
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,826
This is like
Being back home.
176
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,829
Hey, carla, look,
I want to tell you
177
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:18,298
How much I appreciate
You inviting me
Over here.
178
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:19,432
Don't mention it.
179
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:21,134
I really appreciate it.
180
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:23,571
No, I mean, don't
Ever mention to anyone
181
00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:26,506
That I let you
In this house.
182
00:08:28,275 --> 00:08:30,077
May I change
The channel
183
00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:31,278
Or are you guys
Watching this half
Time salute
184
00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:32,512
To our fabulous
Universe?
185
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,513
Yeah, go ahead.
Change it.
186
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,148
Oh,
The parade!
187
00:08:35,148 --> 00:08:37,084
And who's this
Coming out way?
188
00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:39,486
None other than
A 60-foot mighty mouse.
189
00:08:39,486 --> 00:08:42,289
All right!
Mighty mouse!
190
00:08:42,289 --> 00:08:44,391
[doorbell rings]
191
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,560
I'll get it.
192
00:08:47,761 --> 00:08:49,296
Afternoon,
Everybody.
193
00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:50,731
Normie!
Norm!
194
00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:53,834
Where's vera?
195
00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:56,670
She's, uh...
Going to put on
A little more make-up.
196
00:08:56,670 --> 00:08:59,673
That first coat
Didn't really take.
197
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:04,444
She is coming,
Isn't she?
198
00:09:04,444 --> 00:09:06,847
Well, uh...Maybe.
199
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:08,882
What are you
Saying there,
Normie?
200
00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:11,819
We had the worst fight
Of our marriage.
201
00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,453
Oh, gee.
That's tough.
202
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:16,289
She knew how much
This meant to me,
203
00:09:16,289 --> 00:09:19,126
And she still insisted
On going to her mother's.
204
00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:20,928
So I told her, "Look,
I'm going to carla's.
205
00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:22,930
"You want to meet
Me there? Fine.
206
00:09:22,930 --> 00:09:26,199
If you want to go
To your mother's,
Then just stay there."
207
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:27,134
Brutal.
208
00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:37,745
You know, norm,
I don't think
You should worry about it.
209
00:09:37,745 --> 00:09:40,280
She'll probably
Come to her senses
And show up.
210
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:43,283
The important thing
Is that you're here
With us now.
211
00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:46,153
This is gonna be
The best thanksgiving
Ever.
212
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:47,487
All right, woody.
213
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:49,122
I brought that turkey.
214
00:09:53,661 --> 00:09:55,462
That turkey seems kind
Of big and raw.
215
00:09:55,462 --> 00:09:58,231
Think it's gonna be
Ready in time
For dinner?
216
00:09:58,231 --> 00:10:01,168
I had planned
On just a bit more
Cooking time,
217
00:10:01,168 --> 00:10:04,371
But traffic on I-93
Was bumper to bumper.
218
00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:05,673
I-93? I took
Side streets.
219
00:10:05,673 --> 00:10:08,108
I got here
In 35 minutes,
Buddy.
220
00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,843
You didn't
Take mass avenue.
221
00:10:09,843 --> 00:10:10,844
No. Commonwealth--
222
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:12,379
I swear to god--
223
00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:13,747
Commonwealth runs--
224
00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:16,183
I need the quickest way
To get to the kitchen now.
225
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,617
Come on. I'll
Show you where
Everything is.
226
00:10:25,693 --> 00:10:27,695
No waiting around
For my contribution.
227
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:30,363
Here you go.
228
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:31,364
Popcorn balls.
229
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:32,766
Chow down.
230
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,367
Are these what you brought
To the halloween party.
231
00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:37,504
Yeah.
They're a perennial
Favorite, wood man.
232
00:10:37,504 --> 00:10:39,840
Yeah, but aren't these
The ones you brought to...
233
00:10:41,408 --> 00:10:42,575
[doorbell rings]
234
00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:43,711
Let me.
235
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:46,947
Hi.
236
00:10:46,947 --> 00:10:48,949
Hi, sammy.
I thought
You were vera.
237
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:51,351
Boy,
I can't wait
To meet her.
238
00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:53,553
Hey, sammy.
239
00:10:53,553 --> 00:10:55,255
How are you, sam?
240
00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:56,556
Where's your date?
241
00:10:56,556 --> 00:10:58,058
Aw, well,
Change of plans.
242
00:10:58,058 --> 00:11:01,061
Her sister showed up
From out of town.
243
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:02,896
They didn't like my idea.
244
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:05,432
So what the hell.
245
00:11:05,432 --> 00:11:06,366
Hey, guys.
246
00:11:08,435 --> 00:11:09,436
Hey. Yeah.
247
00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:10,437
Watching. Great.
248
00:11:13,540 --> 00:11:17,244
You know,
The important thing
Is that you're here now.
249
00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:19,446
We're all here. This is
Gonna be the greatest.
250
00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:20,647
Who needs family?
251
00:11:20,647 --> 00:11:21,815
Woody,
You're right.
252
00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:23,350
Family is not
Necessarily limited
253
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:24,718
To blood relations.
254
00:11:24,718 --> 00:11:26,453
That's right.
255
00:11:26,453 --> 00:11:28,155
It's better than hanging
Out with a bunch of
Dingbat cousins
256
00:11:28,155 --> 00:11:30,758
All day long
That you don't see
But once a year.
257
00:11:30,758 --> 00:11:31,992
Or waiting for some
Nutty old aunt
258
00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:33,827
To show up
And spoil all your fun.
259
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:35,362
[doorbell rings]
260
00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:36,429
Gobble, gobble.
261
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,680
[doorbell rings]
262
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:55,248
Carla,
Open the door.
263
00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:56,183
No!
264
00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:57,550
It's thanksgiving.
Carla.
265
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,019
Oh, ok.
266
00:11:59,019 --> 00:12:01,421
Maybe she'll choke
On a drumstick.
267
00:12:03,356 --> 00:12:04,792
Thank you, carla.
268
00:12:05,826 --> 00:12:06,994
Hello, everyone.
269
00:12:06,994 --> 00:12:08,495
Hey,
Miss chambers.
270
00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:09,496
Hey, uh...
271
00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:10,864
Diane.
272
00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:13,533
Carla, I like what you've
Done with the place.
273
00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:15,002
What do you want?
274
00:12:15,002 --> 00:12:18,005
Well,
I decided I'd rather
Be among friends
275
00:12:18,005 --> 00:12:20,974
Than with my stuffy
Old professor.
276
00:12:22,675 --> 00:12:24,677
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
277
00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:26,313
What happened?
278
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:29,382
Oh...
279
00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:30,350
Come on.
280
00:12:30,350 --> 00:12:32,385
I'm afraid
My golden afternoon
281
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:33,787
Turned to dross.
282
00:12:33,787 --> 00:12:35,622
I thought it was
Clouding up.
283
00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:38,859
The moment I arrived
At the home of
My professor
284
00:12:38,859 --> 00:12:42,395
I was greeted by a man
With a clipboard
285
00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:44,197
Who handed me a tray
286
00:12:44,197 --> 00:12:47,234
And told me
To serve the daiquiris
To miss radziwill.
287
00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:48,401
Oh.
288
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:51,704
We students were invited
As domestic help.
289
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:53,040
Heh heh heh!
290
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,710
It might be all right
291
00:12:57,710 --> 00:13:00,780
When you're
A wide-eyed 19-year-old,
292
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:03,450
But it's not ok
When you're...Not.
293
00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,487
We're all
Very sorry, diane.
294
00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:09,089
Thank you, sam.
295
00:13:09,089 --> 00:13:12,292
At least you told
That pinhead off,
Didn't you?
296
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:15,228
Oh, I dropped the tray,
Burst into tears,
297
00:13:15,228 --> 00:13:18,431
Took a moment to
Freshen up my mascara,
298
00:13:18,431 --> 00:13:19,366
And fled.
299
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:23,503
The important thing
Is you're here now.
300
00:13:23,503 --> 00:13:24,637
This is gonna
Be great.
301
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:27,807
Somebody put a gag
On andy hardy.
302
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,242
If I were you,
I'd call
That guy
303
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:32,245
And nail
His sheepskin
To the wall.
304
00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:33,947
You're
Absolutely right.
305
00:13:33,947 --> 00:13:36,449
Better yet,
Why don't you
Go on over there
306
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:38,751
And tell him
In person?
307
00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:39,752
Yeah.
Yeah.
308
00:13:39,752 --> 00:13:41,121
Good idea.
309
00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:44,457
Hello. Dr. Narsutis?
This is diane chambers.
310
00:13:44,457 --> 00:13:46,259
Yes, the one who fled.
311
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:49,796
Listen--I beg
Your pardon?
312
00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:54,101
Well, yes, of course
I accept your apology.
313
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:56,803
He's invited me back.
314
00:13:56,803 --> 00:13:57,938
Go. Go.
315
00:13:57,938 --> 00:13:59,539
Best thing that
Could happen.
316
00:13:59,539 --> 00:14:02,142
Dr. Narsutis,
I'm sorry. I can't.
317
00:14:02,142 --> 00:14:05,212
I'm here
With my friends,
My support system,
318
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:08,148
And there's really
No place I'd rather be.
319
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:11,484
I trust this won't
Affect my grade.
320
00:14:11,484 --> 00:14:12,652
Thank you.
321
00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,187
Good day, sir.
322
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:17,157
Turned him
Down, huh?
323
00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,292
Now that I
Find myself
324
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:21,794
In the warmth
Of your company,
325
00:14:21,794 --> 00:14:23,496
How could I possibly go?
326
00:14:23,496 --> 00:14:24,831
The street.
327
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:25,832
I-93.
328
00:14:25,832 --> 00:14:27,734
You holiday
Hooligans,
329
00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:29,469
Give me a beer.
330
00:14:31,504 --> 00:14:33,506
So, sam--thanks.
331
00:14:33,506 --> 00:14:34,807
Where's your date?
332
00:14:34,807 --> 00:14:36,509
Oh, change of plans.
333
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:37,644
Her sister showed up.
334
00:14:37,644 --> 00:14:39,746
Of course she did.
335
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:42,182
Chortle, chortle.
336
00:14:43,183 --> 00:14:44,317
No, I'm serious.
337
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:47,087
I had a date,
And it fell through.
338
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:50,123
You don't have
To convince me.
I believe you.
339
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:52,692
I'm telling you
The truth.
340
00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:55,328
And I love you for it.
341
00:14:58,198 --> 00:14:59,732
How's the turkey
Doing there, norm?
342
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:03,003
I'd say pretty good
For about five minutes.
343
00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:06,239
Half time's over.
The game's back on.
344
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,640
Oh, you're
Watching sports?
345
00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:09,276
Don't worry
About it.
346
00:15:09,276 --> 00:15:10,978
Game's almost over.
347
00:15:10,978 --> 00:15:13,313
Oh, I hope so.
348
00:15:18,485 --> 00:15:20,053
I deliver his mail.
349
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:22,355
Isn't this game
Over yet?
350
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:23,223
Not yet.
351
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:24,958
Well, their uniforms
352
00:15:24,958 --> 00:15:26,859
Are different colors
Than before.
353
00:15:26,859 --> 00:15:28,795
They got
To change them
354
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:31,965
Every time they
Score a touchdown.
355
00:15:31,965 --> 00:15:34,934
Normie, where the hell's
That bird?
356
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,503
It's a big turkey.
357
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:37,670
So are you.
358
00:15:46,713 --> 00:15:49,649
Now wait a minute!
359
00:15:51,018 --> 00:15:52,519
Diane, you're
Absolutely right.
360
00:15:52,519 --> 00:15:55,022
Let's turn it back
On football, guys.
361
00:15:55,022 --> 00:15:57,524
No, no, no!
Enough is enough!
362
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,592
I don't think
Watching television
363
00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:01,028
Was the pilgrim's
Original intent
364
00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:03,030
When they created
The holiday.
365
00:16:03,030 --> 00:16:04,697
Well, uh...
366
00:16:04,697 --> 00:16:05,698
No, hey...
367
00:16:05,698 --> 00:16:07,267
Come on!
368
00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:09,536
Look, look, look.
The turkey's probably
Almost done.
369
00:16:09,536 --> 00:16:12,039
Let's adjourn
To the dining room.
370
00:16:12,039 --> 00:16:14,141
Wonderful idea, norman.
Wonderful.
371
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:17,744
Ok. We'll be sitting
Boy, girl, boy, girl.
372
00:16:17,744 --> 00:16:19,746
Clavin,
You can sit anywhere.
373
00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:21,048
Somebody
Save me a seat.
374
00:16:21,048 --> 00:16:23,816
I got to see a man
About a horse.
375
00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:28,355
He doesn't really
Have to see a man
About a horse.
376
00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:33,726
Yes. All right.
377
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:38,231
What do you say
We dig into this
Jell-o surprise here?
378
00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:39,932
Uh, uh, uh, uh!
379
00:16:39,932 --> 00:16:42,735
We're not eating
Until the turkey's
On the table.
380
00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:45,938
Everybody went to
A lot of bother to
Make this fine meal.
381
00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:47,940
We're not gonna eat
It in pieces.
382
00:16:47,940 --> 00:16:49,609
Keep your hands
Off the food.
383
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:53,280
Listen, guys, the
Turkey's not exactly
Browned just yet.
384
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:54,881
So, what color
Is it, then?
385
00:16:54,881 --> 00:16:56,483
Off-white.
386
00:16:58,685 --> 00:17:02,055
I reset the timer
And turned up the gas.
387
00:17:02,055 --> 00:17:05,258
I expect the little pop
Thing will be popping
Out any time now.
388
00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:08,261
I hope in a hurry
Because I'm starved.
389
00:17:08,261 --> 00:17:12,332
Well, I suggest
We take advantage
Of the delay
390
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:17,904
And engage in one of my
Family's favorite little
Thanksgiving traditions.
391
00:17:17,904 --> 00:17:20,907
Sam, I know you're standing
In the hallway. Get in here.
392
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:22,642
Rats.
393
00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:25,512
In lieu of grace,
394
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,480
We stand up
And take turns
395
00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:29,116
Toasting
That for which
We are thankful.
396
00:17:29,116 --> 00:17:31,451
Since you're already
Standing, sam, why
Don't you begin?
397
00:17:32,819 --> 00:17:34,621
All right. I'm, uh...
398
00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:38,125
I'm thankful
That I...Have a super car
399
00:17:38,125 --> 00:17:39,626
And a cool stereo
400
00:17:39,626 --> 00:17:43,130
And that I'm not dressed
In a pilgrim's outfit.
401
00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:46,032
You make a mockery
Of everything.
402
00:17:46,032 --> 00:17:47,033
Oh, well...
403
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:48,368
Hey, can I go next?
404
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:49,936
I don't see a line.
405
00:17:49,936 --> 00:17:51,871
Woody!
Woody!
Woody!
406
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:53,706
Woody!
Woody!
Woody!
407
00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:55,375
Uh...
408
00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:57,777
I'm thankful
I'm an american.
409
00:17:57,777 --> 00:17:59,379
Hey, all right.
410
00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:02,149
I'm thankful
For the upbringing
My parents gave me.
411
00:18:02,149 --> 00:18:06,153
I'm thankful
For the all friends
I've made in boston.
412
00:18:06,153 --> 00:18:10,423
And I'm thankful
That I can do this.
413
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,225
Yo!
414
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:13,660
Put it away!
Whew!
415
00:18:13,660 --> 00:18:14,761
Man!
416
00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:16,729
Can you guys do this?
417
00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:18,465
Oh, my god!
418
00:18:18,465 --> 00:18:21,368
That makes my thing
Look kind of stupid.
419
00:18:21,368 --> 00:18:24,471
Look at me
Wiggle my ears.
Watch this.
420
00:18:24,471 --> 00:18:26,573
Look at these
Ears flapping.
421
00:18:26,573 --> 00:18:27,874
Please, please!
422
00:18:27,874 --> 00:18:31,544
We are not here to be
Thankful for strange things
423
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:33,846
We can do
With our bodies.
424
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:39,519
Norman, you're next.
425
00:18:39,519 --> 00:18:42,555
I'm thankful there's
A turkey in the kitchen
That needs to be checked.
426
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:45,258
Yeah, get
The damn thing
Out here!
427
00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:46,893
All right.
428
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:50,563
I guess I need to
Give you an indication
What I had in mind.
429
00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:54,567
I, too, am thankful
For my health and
For my dear friends,
430
00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:57,270
But on this
Very special occasion,
431
00:18:57,270 --> 00:19:00,340
My mind goes back
Over the years
To the people
432
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:01,574
Who have influenced me.
433
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:04,444
I'd like to name
Some for you.
434
00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:05,878
Teilhard' dechardin...
435
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,349
Georges sand...
436
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:11,918
Caravaggio...
437
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:14,587
Oh, emily dickinson...
438
00:19:14,587 --> 00:19:16,289
The buddha...
439
00:19:17,224 --> 00:19:18,858
Frank lloyd wright...
440
00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:21,394
Jeanne d'arc...
441
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:23,530
Shari lewis
And lambchop...
442
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:30,102
Guys, listen,
I'm having
A slight problem
443
00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:31,871
With the damn bird.
444
00:19:31,871 --> 00:19:33,806
What color
Is it now?
445
00:19:33,806 --> 00:19:36,576
I think
We're moving into
The earth tones.
446
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:42,415
This better
Be good news.
447
00:19:42,415 --> 00:19:43,650
Look,
I'm sorry, guys.
448
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:46,419
The little
Pop thing
Won't pop out.
449
00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:47,587
Something's
Wrong with it.
450
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:48,921
Something's
Wrong with you.
451
00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:51,123
No, no.
It's the little
Pop thing.
452
00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:52,492
Could somebody
Please explain to me
453
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:54,794
Where the little
Pop thing is on the turkey?
454
00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:56,663
'cause maybe it's
Different in the city,
455
00:19:56,663 --> 00:19:58,298
But in the country
Where I come from,
456
00:19:58,298 --> 00:20:01,568
Turkeys aren't born
With little pop things.
457
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:03,169
The little pop thing
Has a name!
458
00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:04,437
It's called
A thermometer!
459
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:06,573
Now, can we
All please say
Thermometer?
460
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:08,808
Thermometer!
Thermometer!
Yeah!
461
00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:10,510
We can say it
'til we're blue
In the face.
462
00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:13,413
It's not gonna
Make it pop out
Any faster!
463
00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:16,416
I think something's
Wrong with
Your oven, carla.
464
00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:18,150
Hey, my oven was just fine
465
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:20,453
Until you stuffed
Birdzilla inside!
466
00:20:21,588 --> 00:20:23,323
Come on, you guys.
Come on!
467
00:20:23,323 --> 00:20:27,059
We don't have to
Bite each others'
Heads off here.
468
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:30,597
It may be the only thing
We get to eat this day, sammy.
469
00:20:32,299 --> 00:20:33,700
Hey, guys,
This is thanksgiving.
470
00:20:33,700 --> 00:20:37,304
I still say
It's gonna be
The greatest.
471
00:20:37,304 --> 00:20:40,307
Who the hell do we
Think we're kidding?
472
00:20:40,307 --> 00:20:41,608
We're all a bunch of
Pathetic dropouts...
473
00:20:41,608 --> 00:20:43,610
Scorned by
Our loved ones,
474
00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:46,313
As if anybody ever
Loved us at all.
475
00:20:46,313 --> 00:20:47,714
Will you lighten up,
Man?
476
00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:49,382
The only thing wrong
Here is we're hungry.
477
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:50,983
Now, who else wants
To join me
In these...
478
00:20:50,983 --> 00:20:54,053
Ice cold potatoes?
479
00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:57,156
They'll go
Great here with
The jell-o soup.
480
00:20:57,156 --> 00:20:58,491
I'm dying to try
481
00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:01,193
Some of
The hair growing
On the crudites.
482
00:21:01,193 --> 00:21:03,195
Well, pass me
My peas.
483
00:21:03,195 --> 00:21:06,232
I made them,
So I know they're ok.
484
00:21:06,232 --> 00:21:08,835
Was that remark
Directed at me?
485
00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:11,203
No. It was directed
At your stupid turkey
486
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:12,839
And your stupid
Stuffing
487
00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:14,273
And your stupid gravy!
488
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:15,875
What's wrong
With my gravy?
489
00:21:15,875 --> 00:21:19,512
Nothing! Except
You could walk across
The skin on top of it!
490
00:21:19,512 --> 00:21:21,213
I'm sorry,
Julia child.
491
00:21:21,213 --> 00:21:22,515
Here's your
Perfect peas.
492
00:21:22,515 --> 00:21:24,817
Oh, look.
I spilled one.
Sorry.
493
00:21:27,754 --> 00:21:28,788
Thank you.
494
00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:31,991
Norm, I'm sorry
About what I said
495
00:21:31,991 --> 00:21:33,292
About your gravy.
496
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:34,994
All right.
497
00:21:34,994 --> 00:21:36,496
It's ok.
498
00:21:36,496 --> 00:21:38,398
So are the carrots.
499
00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:44,471
Anybody want
Some of these,
Uh...Lovely yams?
500
00:21:50,410 --> 00:21:54,313
Woody, would you
Care to test
The gravy skin?
501
00:21:57,417 --> 00:21:59,318
People, people,
People, people!
502
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:00,920
Stop this immediately!
503
00:22:07,293 --> 00:22:09,295
I have
Never been witness
504
00:22:09,295 --> 00:22:11,731
To such a silly,
Soph--
505
00:22:21,808 --> 00:22:23,443
Sam malone...
506
00:22:23,443 --> 00:22:26,078
Kiss your butt good-bye!
507
00:22:48,501 --> 00:22:51,471
See? I knew this was
Gonna be the greatest.
508
00:22:51,471 --> 00:22:53,272
Good bird.
509
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:55,307
Hey, diane,
May I say
510
00:22:55,307 --> 00:22:57,977
You look saucy
In cranberry.
511
00:22:59,278 --> 00:23:01,280
Laugh while
You can, sam.
512
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:02,582
Just remember
That revenge
513
00:23:02,582 --> 00:23:05,184
Is a dish
Best served cold.
514
00:23:05,184 --> 00:23:07,620
You won't know
When and you won't
Know where,
515
00:23:07,620 --> 00:23:09,622
But I'm going
To get you.
516
00:23:09,622 --> 00:23:11,157
Now that we've eaten,
517
00:23:11,157 --> 00:23:12,525
I'd like to make a toast
518
00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:14,060
To our loved ones who
Weren't fortunate enough
519
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,394
To be here with us.
520
00:23:15,394 --> 00:23:17,129
That's
A nice thought.
521
00:23:17,129 --> 00:23:21,133
Uh...Mom, dad,
Uncle fergie.
522
00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:23,202
My kids.
523
00:23:23,202 --> 00:23:24,704
All right, vera.
524
00:23:24,704 --> 00:23:25,705
Ma.
525
00:23:25,705 --> 00:23:26,506
Coach.
526
00:23:26,506 --> 00:23:28,207
Yeah!
Hear hear.
527
00:23:28,207 --> 00:23:30,142
Oh, god
Bless you all.
528
00:23:31,844 --> 00:23:35,047
Well, I think
We're about ready
For dessert.
529
00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:36,315
Yeah.
530
00:23:36,315 --> 00:23:37,617
Everybody
Get eat enough?
531
00:23:37,617 --> 00:23:39,351
I never got a
Chance to try
The potatoes.
532
00:23:39,351 --> 00:23:40,352
[doorbell rings]
533
00:23:40,352 --> 00:23:41,521
Oh, well,
Here, let me...
534
00:23:41,521 --> 00:23:42,855
Thank you.
535
00:23:46,092 --> 00:23:47,760
Norm: vera, you came.
536
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:49,462
Honey, I'm so happy.
537
00:23:49,462 --> 00:23:50,897
Hey, you guys.
538
00:23:50,897 --> 00:23:52,264
Come on, vera, come on
And meet all the guys.
539
00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:54,767
This is great--
We finally get
To meet vera.
540
00:23:55,935 --> 00:23:57,436
Sam...Think fast!
541
00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:58,771
[splat]
542
00:24:02,575 --> 00:24:04,577
Everybody,
This is vera.
543
00:24:05,712 --> 00:24:07,847
Charming friends, norm.
Get your coat.
544
00:24:07,847 --> 00:24:09,782
Yes, dear.
38199
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