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1
00:00:03,237 --> 00:00:07,108
Cheers is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:07,108 --> 00:00:09,643
But it was your fault
We lost that contest.
3
00:00:09,643 --> 00:00:11,112
It was not my fault.
4
00:00:11,112 --> 00:00:12,980
Ok, ok. We'll find
Out whose fault it was.
5
00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:14,182
Heart of my heart,
From the top.
6
00:00:14,182 --> 00:00:16,450
All right.
Sing it.
7
00:00:16,450 --> 00:00:19,420
* heart of my heart *
8
00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:21,089
* I love that melody *
9
00:00:21,089 --> 00:00:22,456
* love that melody *
10
00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:25,326
* heart of my heart
Brings back-- *
11
00:00:25,326 --> 00:00:27,061
That's it right there.
That's the note
12
00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:28,462
That cost us
The championship.
13
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:31,765
Yeah? Well, that remark
Just cost you a bass.
14
00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:33,434
Hey, wait
A minute, jim.
15
00:00:33,434 --> 00:00:36,570
Now we got to find
Another bass.
16
00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:37,938
Three beers.
17
00:00:37,938 --> 00:00:40,441
You know, I love
Barbershop quartets.
18
00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:42,743
Do you mind if I make
A little request?
19
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:44,044
Not at all.
20
00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:47,648
Could you give me
A little trim around
The ears later?
21
00:00:49,817 --> 00:00:51,152
Excuse me, fellas.
22
00:00:51,152 --> 00:00:53,254
I couldn't help
Overhearing what happened.
23
00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:55,556
It's always been
A lifelong dream of mine
24
00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:57,191
To sing
In a barbershop quartet.
25
00:00:57,191 --> 00:00:59,160
I wonder if you might
Give me a try?
26
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:00,994
Why not?
27
00:01:00,994 --> 00:01:02,863
Goodnight
Ladies ok?
28
00:01:02,863 --> 00:01:05,599
Yeah. Goodnight ladies.
All right, all right.
29
00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:14,142
* goodnight ladies *
30
00:01:14,142 --> 00:01:16,310
* goodnight ladies *
31
00:01:16,310 --> 00:01:18,246
* goodnight ladies *
32
00:01:18,246 --> 00:01:21,582
* we're going
To leave you now *
33
00:01:28,289 --> 00:01:30,090
That was fantastic!
34
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,359
Hey! We've
Got ourselves
A new bass.
35
00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:33,861
You know, I'm really
Flattered, fellas,
36
00:01:33,861 --> 00:01:35,596
But I don't think so.
37
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:37,131
But you just said it
Was your lifelong dream
38
00:01:37,131 --> 00:01:38,532
To sing in a
Barbershop quartet.
39
00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:40,734
Well, it was,
And now I've done it.
40
00:01:40,734 --> 00:01:42,303
Thanks for the memories.
41
00:01:47,841 --> 00:01:50,344
* making your way
In the world today *
42
00:01:50,344 --> 00:01:53,347
* takes everything
You've got *
43
00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:56,184
* taking a break
From all your worries *
44
00:01:56,184 --> 00:01:59,420
* sure would help a lot *
45
00:01:59,420 --> 00:02:02,723
* wouldn't you like
To get away? *
46
00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:07,495
* sometimes
You wanna go *
47
00:02:07,495 --> 00:02:12,800
* where everybody
Knows your name *
48
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:17,438
* and they're always
Glad you came *
49
00:02:17,438 --> 00:02:19,773
* you wanna be
Where you can see *
50
00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:22,476
* our troubles
Are all the same *
51
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:26,680
* you wanna be where
Everybody knows your name *
52
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:30,284
* you wanna go
Where people know *
53
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:32,820
* people are all the same *
54
00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:37,425
* you wanna go where
Everybody knows your name *
55
00:02:55,909 --> 00:02:59,247
* the farmer in the dell,
The farmer in the dell *
56
00:02:59,247 --> 00:03:01,549
Hey, everybody.
Howdy doody.
57
00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:03,351
Guess what I got
In the bag.
58
00:03:03,351 --> 00:03:05,353
What's left
Of your mind?
59
00:03:05,353 --> 00:03:08,088
Ha ha ha!
Ladies and gentlemen,
60
00:03:08,088 --> 00:03:10,090
I'd like to introduce
61
00:03:10,090 --> 00:03:13,294
A turnip that needs
No introduction...
62
00:03:13,294 --> 00:03:16,364
Miss june lockhart.
63
00:03:16,364 --> 00:03:17,698
Yeah, look here.
64
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,600
You put a little
Make-up on her,
65
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:22,803
Shampoo and set
Her root hairs,
66
00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:24,338
And finish her off
67
00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:26,807
With a delicate
Strand of pearls...
68
00:03:29,277 --> 00:03:34,181
Is it me, or is this
Getting a little weird?
69
00:03:34,181 --> 00:03:36,917
You passed weird
Six months ago.
70
00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:38,552
Now you're
Boldly going
71
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:41,889
Where no man
Has gone before.
72
00:03:41,889 --> 00:03:46,494
Boy. I guess it's true
What they say, huh?
73
00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,496
There's a fine line
74
00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:52,165
Between gardening
And madness.
75
00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:54,435
Cliff, old man, uh...
76
00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:58,439
Maybe a little vacation
Would do you some good.
77
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:00,173
Now if you'll
Excuse me,
78
00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:01,975
I've got to get
Back to my office.
79
00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:04,512
Hey, dos, listen.
Do you mind if I
Tag along with you,
80
00:04:04,512 --> 00:04:05,779
Just for
The stroll--
81
00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,348
A little informal
Chat on the way?
82
00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:09,483
You bet, cliff.
I'd enjoy the company.
83
00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:11,352
Yeah. Listen, I'm a
Very private man,
84
00:04:11,352 --> 00:04:12,920
I'd better warn you
At the outset.
85
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,188
I just don't
Bare my soul at
The drop of a hat.
86
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:16,557
Oh, I understand.
87
00:04:16,557 --> 00:04:20,127
I was breast-fed a lot
Longer than most youngsters.
88
00:04:20,127 --> 00:04:21,929
I mean, babies.
89
00:04:24,465 --> 00:04:26,033
Hey, everybody.
90
00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:29,136
Hey, sam.
I thought you weren't
Coming in till 5:00.
91
00:04:29,136 --> 00:04:30,571
I had to pick up
Some stuff.
92
00:04:30,571 --> 00:04:32,239
We're going to play
Some racquetball.
93
00:04:32,239 --> 00:04:34,408
Oh, bonnie, woody.
Woody, bonnie.
94
00:04:34,408 --> 00:04:36,043
Hi.
Hi.
95
00:04:36,043 --> 00:04:38,011
So, where
Have you guys been?
96
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:40,213
We spent the afternoon
At bonnie's apartment
97
00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:41,782
Listening to
The latest album
98
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,585
Of john cougar
Mellen...Something.
99
00:04:44,585 --> 00:04:46,520
Mellencamp.
Yeah, he's great.
100
00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:47,821
Yeah, you're
Telling me.
101
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:49,857
So, what rock groups
Do you like, bonnie?
102
00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:52,059
Let's see. I like
The thompson twins,
103
00:04:52,059 --> 00:04:54,227
Tears for fears, u2.
104
00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:55,629
Oh, I love u2.
105
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,631
Yeah. We look
Great together,
Don't we?
106
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:59,166
I'll be
Right back.
107
00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:01,301
I'm going to get
My equipment.
108
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,403
Pretty girl, sam.
109
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:03,704
Yeah. Thank you.
110
00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:05,506
Be careful she doesn't
Lose a baby tooth
111
00:05:05,506 --> 00:05:07,408
Giving you a hickey.
112
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:14,848
What's that crack
Supposed to mean?
113
00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:17,551
Is she...She young
Or something?
114
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:19,587
Well, you must admit
115
00:05:19,587 --> 00:05:22,723
There's a bit of a gap
Between your ages.
116
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,392
Oh, yeah?
117
00:05:24,392 --> 00:05:25,726
She's a very
Sophisticated woman,
118
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,361
And she's traveled
Extensively.
119
00:05:27,361 --> 00:05:28,929
She's been
To hawaii.
120
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:30,063
Oh.
121
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:34,902
I envy sammy his
Carefree lifestyle.
122
00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:35,903
Yeah.
123
00:05:35,903 --> 00:05:37,905
Night after night,
He dates pretty girls
124
00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:41,008
While I sit here
And wrestle with the
World's problems.
125
00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:42,376
You do not.
126
00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:44,378
What do you mean?
Last night, I let out
127
00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:45,946
That moan at the thought
Of nuclear war.
128
00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:47,915
It wasn't because
Of nuclear war.
129
00:05:47,915 --> 00:05:50,918
It's because we ran out
Of beer nuts.
130
00:05:50,918 --> 00:05:53,220
It was a combination
Of the two.
131
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:55,322
You all set?
132
00:05:55,322 --> 00:05:56,724
Oh, yeah.
133
00:05:56,724 --> 00:05:59,560
You know, sam, woody is
A really rad guy.
134
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:01,261
Well, you know
My motto--
135
00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:02,530
"Hire the rad."
136
00:06:02,530 --> 00:06:04,465
Oh, wait a second. Here.
137
00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:07,300
Let me get some money.
I'll be right back.
138
00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:08,502
Hey, have
A good game.
139
00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:10,103
Thanks, woody.
I'll see you saturday?
140
00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,640
Saturday? What's
Happening saturday?
141
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:15,943
Saturday, woody and I are
Going to play racquetball.
142
00:06:15,943 --> 00:06:18,479
I didn't know you
Played racquetball.
143
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:19,880
Yeah, I play a little.
144
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,182
Well, why didn't
You tell me?
145
00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:26,086
Well, I didn't think
The two of us should play.
146
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,421
Why not?
147
00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:28,956
Oh, come on, man!
148
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:31,725
Just because I'm
A professional
Athlete?
149
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,594
No, it wasn't that.
150
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:35,395
It was more because
You're a little...
151
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,431
I mean, you're a
Few years...
152
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:41,702
Yeah. It's because you're
A professional athlete.
153
00:06:44,972 --> 00:06:46,774
No, it wasn't
It's because
154
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:49,176
You think I was
Old, maybe.
155
00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:51,178
Oh, no, no, not old, sam.
156
00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:54,181
Just old...Er.
157
00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:55,549
You want
To take me on,
158
00:06:55,549 --> 00:06:57,485
You little...
Guy, you?
159
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,121
Sure. I'd like that.
160
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:03,223
All right.
Carla, you want to
Tend the bar here?
161
00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:04,492
Got it.
162
00:07:04,492 --> 00:07:06,760
Sam, has it
Occurred to you
163
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,762
That you challenged
Woody to a contest
164
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,798
Because
He threatens
165
00:07:10,798 --> 00:07:12,866
Your relationship
With bonnie?
166
00:07:12,866 --> 00:07:15,168
No. But has this
Occurred to you--
167
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,670
Leave me alone.
168
00:07:19,339 --> 00:07:20,574
You all set, man?
169
00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,109
I sure am.
170
00:07:22,109 --> 00:07:23,577
Great.
Great.
171
00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:34,522
Oh, hey--is that
Somebody famous?
172
00:07:38,258 --> 00:07:39,793
Oh. I guess not.
173
00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:42,462
I'm sorry.
My mistake.
174
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:44,765
Ok. We're off
Here, huh?
175
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:50,604
You're not too tired
To work the bar,
Now, are you, woody?
176
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:52,439
I can take over,
You know.
177
00:07:52,439 --> 00:07:53,974
No, no, I'm fine.
178
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:56,577
Ha ha...Oh...
179
00:07:58,646 --> 00:07:59,947
Sam, are you limping?
180
00:07:59,947 --> 00:08:01,715
I don't know.
Let me take a look here.
181
00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:04,417
Oh, by golly! Look at that.
Must be these new shoes.
182
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:05,519
Who won?
183
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:07,020
Sam did.
184
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:09,990
You should have
Seen him out there.
He was great.
185
00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,392
I especially liked
That last shot you made
186
00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:13,727
Diving across the court,
187
00:08:13,727 --> 00:08:16,363
And that little scream
You let out.
188
00:08:16,363 --> 00:08:18,465
That's my
Victory scream.
189
00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:21,101
I always do that
When I win.
190
00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,036
Are you all right?
191
00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:24,004
Yeah. Why?
192
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:27,808
Your upper lip is
Sweating profusely.
193
00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:29,543
I just played
Racquetball.
194
00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:31,244
People sweat when
They do that.
195
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,613
On their lips?
196
00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,347
Didn't you take
A shower afterwards?
197
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:38,218
Of course is did.
Maybe I just forgot
To dry my lip.
198
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,426
Does sam's behavior
Give you pause?
199
00:08:46,426 --> 00:08:50,263
Methinks the man
Does protest too much.
200
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,065
Excuse me,
Miss chambers,
201
00:08:52,065 --> 00:08:54,768
But shouldn't
It be "I thinks"?
202
00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:01,108
Not in your case, woody.
203
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:06,146
Carla: what's with
The skis, sam?
204
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:09,216
All this physical activity
Has put me in a physical mood.
205
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:11,118
I feel like doing
Something else physical.
206
00:09:11,118 --> 00:09:13,120
I think I'm going to
Go skiing for a while.
207
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,624
If you need help behind
The bar, woody, call bob.
208
00:09:16,624 --> 00:09:18,726
Sam, this is
All rather sudden.
209
00:09:18,726 --> 00:09:22,095
Where are you
Going? How long
Will you be gone?
210
00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:23,631
Sugarloaf, maine.
211
00:09:23,631 --> 00:09:27,434
If the snow's cold
And the women hot,
I'll be gone forever.
212
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,536
See you, guys.
Bye-bye.
213
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:31,138
What a guy!
214
00:09:31,138 --> 00:09:34,074
We just get through
Playing a hard game
Of racquetball,
215
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,909
And he's still
Raring to go.
216
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:39,212
You just never
Know what he's
Going to do next.
217
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:41,081
Like now,
For example.
218
00:09:57,765 --> 00:10:01,234
Are you
Absolutely sure?
219
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:02,870
Thank you.
220
00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:07,775
Oh, dear me. My worst
Fears are confirmed.
221
00:10:07,775 --> 00:10:10,377
There's been
A peroxide embargo?
222
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,714
This is no time
For levity.
223
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:15,816
I've just called every
Hotel in sugarloaf,
224
00:10:15,816 --> 00:10:18,151
And there's no sam malone
Registered anywhere.
225
00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:20,520
Probably staying
Under an assumed name.
226
00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:24,491
No. I checked all the
Assumed names he usually uses.
227
00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:27,094
There's no lance manion.
228
00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:30,097
Nor is there
A honeyboy wilson.
229
00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:33,266
Hi, everybody.
230
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,502
Hey, doc. I really
Got to hand it to you
231
00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:37,204
For that job
You did on cliffie.
232
00:10:37,204 --> 00:10:39,172
He's really been
In good spirits lately
233
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:40,841
And rarely discusses
Vegetables.
234
00:10:40,841 --> 00:10:42,810
It seems our little
Impromptu session
235
00:10:42,810 --> 00:10:44,144
Has been quite beneficial.
236
00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,079
For my part, I hope to get
An article published
237
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:50,050
In either psychology today
Or the burpee seed catalog.
238
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:53,787
No, no. Seriously,
It's always very gratifying
239
00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:56,790
To help another human being.
240
00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:59,860
Oh, hey, sigmund fraud.
241
00:11:02,429 --> 00:11:03,964
Are you addressing
Me, cliff?
242
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:05,866
This bill is outrageous--
243
00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:08,736
750 bucks here
For a friendly chat.
244
00:11:08,736 --> 00:11:13,173
I've had several of
Ma's organs taken out
For less than that.
245
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,208
Cliff, it was not
A little chat.
246
00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:17,745
It was 7 hours of
Intensive psychotherapy,
247
00:11:17,745 --> 00:11:20,447
Which, I flatter myself
To say, has done you
248
00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:21,949
A world of good!
249
00:11:21,949 --> 00:11:23,450
Oh, yeah?
You think so?
250
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:27,054
I don't think so,
And neither does
Meryl streep!
251
00:11:32,726 --> 00:11:34,361
You ladies ready
For a check?
252
00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:35,562
Yes, yes. Thank you.
253
00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:38,265
Anyway, I've been at
Boston mercy for five years,
254
00:11:38,265 --> 00:11:40,934
And I have never had
A more relentless patient
255
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:42,269
Than I had today.
256
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:44,271
Even though he was
In constant pain,
257
00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:46,606
He never stopped
Coming on to me.
258
00:11:46,606 --> 00:11:49,409
Oh, my god,
It's sam.
259
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:50,643
Are you all right?
260
00:11:50,643 --> 00:11:52,980
The patient you're
Talking about,
261
00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:55,348
Is it, by any
Chance, sam malone?
262
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:57,217
No.
263
00:11:57,217 --> 00:11:58,085
Thank god.
264
00:11:58,085 --> 00:11:59,719
His name is
Lance manion.
265
00:12:13,767 --> 00:12:15,936
Ah. Yeah. Thank you.
266
00:12:15,936 --> 00:12:19,506
Certainly.
Is there anything
Else I can get?
267
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:22,409
Yeah...Naked.
Ha ha!
268
00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:25,412
Actually, I don't think
I could handle it today.
269
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:29,749
Whoo! Boy. These hernias
Always hurt so bad?
270
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,518
Aw, just for
A few days.
271
00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:34,587
Well, if you
Need anything else,
Just ring.
272
00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:36,523
Mm. Thank you.
273
00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:37,958
Oh, god.
274
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:41,028
Sam?
275
00:12:41,028 --> 00:12:44,697
What? Hey! Boy,
What a coincidence.
276
00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:47,000
I just donated
A pint of blood.
277
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,069
The volunteer
Will be back.
278
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:50,871
Just have
A seat here.
279
00:12:50,871 --> 00:12:53,173
And, hey, bless your heart
For giving, really.
280
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:55,108
I know
Why you're here.
281
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:56,844
As luck
Would have it,
282
00:12:56,844 --> 00:12:59,012
A couple of nurses
Stopped by the bar.
283
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:02,282
They had your
Fingerprints
All over them.
284
00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:06,954
I see.
285
00:13:06,954 --> 00:13:10,958
In that case, you don't mind
If I sit down, do you?
286
00:13:10,958 --> 00:13:14,327
From this angle,
It's preferable.
287
00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:15,628
Sam...
288
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:18,765
I know what
This is all about.
289
00:13:18,765 --> 00:13:20,233
Dating young girls,
290
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,169
Nearly killing yourself
To beat woody,
291
00:13:22,169 --> 00:13:24,304
Not telling us you
Were in the hospital.
292
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,506
I didn't tell you
I was in the hospital
293
00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:28,475
Because I got a hernia,
294
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,477
And it's an
Old man's problem,
295
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:33,713
And I didn't want
The guys to make fun
Of me, that's all.
296
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:35,682
First of all,
297
00:13:35,682 --> 00:13:38,818
People of all ages
Get hernias.
298
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,520
Second of all,
299
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,991
Getting older is the most
Natural thing in the world.
300
00:13:43,991 --> 00:13:45,792
There's nothing to fear.
301
00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:47,427
Accept it.
302
00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:49,129
I will not accept it!
303
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:51,498
The day you start
Accepting getting old
304
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,133
Is the day you get old.
305
00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:55,502
All right, sam.
Have it your way.
306
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:57,905
But I think you'd be
Much happier and content
307
00:13:57,905 --> 00:14:00,707
If instead of fighting
The advancing years,
308
00:14:00,707 --> 00:14:03,076
You embrace them
Joyfully.
309
00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:04,677
[knock on door]
310
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,713
Hi. How you
Doing today?
311
00:14:06,713 --> 00:14:08,715
Great, as a matter
Of fact. Great.
312
00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:10,750
Well, I'm glad
To hear that.
313
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:12,252
Diane?
314
00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:13,353
Oh, yeah--
315
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:14,154
Diane chambers?
316
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:15,622
Yes, that's right.
317
00:14:15,622 --> 00:14:16,856
Don't you
Remember me?
318
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,225
Steve mcdonough.
319
00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:20,193
You tutored me
For a while
320
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,896
When I was
In junior high.
321
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:24,965
Stevie mcdonough?
322
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:26,666
Little stevie...
323
00:14:26,666 --> 00:14:28,101
Little dr. Stevie...
324
00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:31,038
Big...Little
Doctor...Stevie.
325
00:14:31,038 --> 00:14:33,006
Yeah. Yes, yeah.
326
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:34,908
It's very nice
To see you again.
327
00:14:34,908 --> 00:14:36,143
I'm sorry.
I have to run.
328
00:14:36,143 --> 00:14:37,877
I'll check in
With you later.
329
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,579
Yeah. Bye-bye.
330
00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:47,955
I'm old and alone
In boston.
331
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,666
Sammy's back!
332
00:14:59,666 --> 00:15:01,634
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
333
00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:03,036
[cheering]
334
00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:05,305
Sam, what are you
Doing back here?
335
00:15:05,305 --> 00:15:07,907
You should be in for
At least another week.
336
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,176
Dr. Stevie said so.
337
00:15:09,176 --> 00:15:11,711
I got me a second
Opinion--my own.
338
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:13,981
I'm as healthy
As an ox.
339
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:16,083
Good to have you
Back, sammy, my man!
340
00:15:16,083 --> 00:15:18,685
Sammy!
Can't keep a good
Man down, huh?
341
00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:20,153
It's good
To be back.
342
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:22,255
Don't encourage him.
He's rushing things.
343
00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:23,556
Good to have
You back, sammy.
344
00:15:23,556 --> 00:15:26,359
Carla, could you cover
The bar a second?
345
00:15:26,359 --> 00:15:28,661
I'm just going to grab
A case of bass ale.
346
00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:31,631
Hey, hold on there,
Young fella. I'll get that.
347
00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:34,334
Don't be stupid, sam.
You just had an operation.
348
00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:36,803
Hey! The day that
I can't pick up
A case of beer
349
00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:38,805
Is the day that
I sell this place.
350
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:40,873
Sam, what are you
Trying to prove?
351
00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:42,342
I'm not trying
To prove anything.
352
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:44,744
I'm just trying
To run a bar here.
353
00:15:44,744 --> 00:15:46,980
Cliff:
Ho! Hey, hey!
354
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:49,049
Not too
Shabby, huh?
355
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:51,218
Nice going, sammy.
356
00:15:54,321 --> 00:15:55,455
Sam?
357
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:56,523
Mm-hmm?
358
00:15:56,523 --> 00:16:00,427
Do you want to go back
To the hospital?
359
00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:02,329
Very badly.
360
00:16:02,329 --> 00:16:04,464
I can do it.
I can do it.
361
00:16:12,839 --> 00:16:14,607
Welcome back,
Valentino.
362
00:16:15,842 --> 00:16:18,145
Hey, that's
The first time
You didn't
363
00:16:18,145 --> 00:16:20,813
Accidentally
Check the starch
In my whites.
364
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:24,751
Oh. Yeah. About that--
I'm sorry if I got fresh.
365
00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:27,554
Don't apologize.
We nurses didn't
Cut the ties
366
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:30,723
Off the back of your
Gown for nothing.
367
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:32,059
Company's coming.
368
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,462
[sobbing]
369
00:16:38,531 --> 00:16:40,867
I'm sorry, sam.
I'm sorry!
370
00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:42,402
I didn't mean
To do that.
371
00:16:42,402 --> 00:16:44,471
I know you didn't.
That's all right. It's ok.
372
00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:47,674
He's been like this ever
Since you left, sam.
373
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:52,479
Sam, I've come to donate
An organ or something.
374
00:16:52,479 --> 00:16:55,082
Woody. Woody,
I have a hernia.
375
00:16:55,082 --> 00:16:58,851
Well, if you need
Another one, take mine.
376
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,020
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
377
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,789
Hey, thanks for
Coming down.
378
00:17:02,789 --> 00:17:04,257
I really
Appreciate that.
379
00:17:04,257 --> 00:17:07,160
You're depressing
The hell out of me.
380
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:09,162
It may be better
If you took off.
381
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,897
You got it, sam.
382
00:17:10,897 --> 00:17:12,599
I'll see you.
383
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:14,134
All right.
Bye-bye.
384
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,571
Here you go, sam.
I want you to have that.
385
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:21,508
It's kind
Of a family heirloom.
386
00:17:21,508 --> 00:17:23,710
What is it?
387
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:25,878
A truss.
388
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:29,516
It came over
With my grandfather
From the old country.
389
00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:31,984
Actually, it came over
On my grandfather.
390
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:33,453
Yeah.
391
00:17:33,453 --> 00:17:34,621
Ah. Well...
392
00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:37,724
Gee, that's nice.
Thank you.
393
00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:38,925
It's a joke!
394
00:17:38,925 --> 00:17:41,128
You don't need this
Thing. You're sammy!
395
00:17:41,128 --> 00:17:43,230
Sammy don't
Wear no truss.
396
00:17:43,230 --> 00:17:45,098
Oh. That's...
That's very funny.
397
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:48,067
Well, don't pop your
Stitches laughing.
398
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,402
I'm sorry.
399
00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,271
It's just this
Stupid hernia thing
400
00:17:51,271 --> 00:17:53,506
Is getting me
Feeling my age.
401
00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:56,109
What are you
Talking about?
402
00:17:56,109 --> 00:17:57,944
Would you stop that!
403
00:17:57,944 --> 00:17:59,746
Sam malone
Never ages.
404
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:02,115
It's one of life's
Great truths.
405
00:18:02,115 --> 00:18:04,117
Let me tell you
Something, sammy.
406
00:18:04,117 --> 00:18:05,952
When you're 87,
407
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:08,521
You'll still be
A hunk to me.
408
00:18:08,521 --> 00:18:11,090
Course, I'll be
Senile and blind.
409
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:15,128
And pregnant.
410
00:18:15,128 --> 00:18:16,563
Yeah, probably.
411
00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:18,998
I'll look you up.
412
00:18:18,998 --> 00:18:20,433
You better.
413
00:18:22,202 --> 00:18:23,803
Ah! Fun's over.
414
00:18:23,803 --> 00:18:25,705
See you around, sam.
415
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:26,973
Thank you, carla.
416
00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:28,241
Hi, carla.
417
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:30,443
You see, there are other
Parts to a hospital
418
00:18:30,443 --> 00:18:32,745
Besides
The maternity ward.
419
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:34,814
Bite it.
420
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:36,183
Hi, sam.
421
00:18:36,183 --> 00:18:37,884
How are you?
422
00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:39,652
I don't even know why
You bother asking.
423
00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:41,688
You know how I am.
I'm old.
424
00:18:41,688 --> 00:18:43,356
Sam, please.
425
00:18:43,356 --> 00:18:45,124
No, you were right.
426
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:48,495
I tried denying it,
But there's no use.
427
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:50,597
All I got to
Look forward to
428
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:53,366
Is slowing down,
Wearing out,
429
00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:56,068
And breaking
The occasional hip.
430
00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:59,172
Oh, sam!
I can't stand
431
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:01,874
To hear you
Talk like that.
432
00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,810
You were right.
I was wrong.
433
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:06,913
You can't just
Lie back and
Accept getting old.
434
00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:09,882
You have to
Live each day
To the fullest.
435
00:19:12,118 --> 00:19:15,588
Oh, yeah...
I don't know. Pff...
436
00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:19,726
No, really.
I mean it.
437
00:19:19,726 --> 00:19:22,762
Besides, you men
Get better-looking
438
00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:24,964
The older that you get.
439
00:19:24,964 --> 00:19:26,899
Look at this guy.
440
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:28,034
Huh?
441
00:19:28,034 --> 00:19:30,670
He's strong,
442
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,104
Vital,
443
00:19:32,104 --> 00:19:33,473
Sexy.
444
00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:35,675
Isn't he something?
445
00:19:39,212 --> 00:19:41,548
You really think
I'm better-looking now?
446
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:43,350
You're much more
Attractive man
447
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:45,852
Than when I first
Met you--much more.
448
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:50,189
And there's no telling
What you may yet achieve.
449
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,991
I went to
The library today.
450
00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:56,763
And I found a book that
Contains a list of people
451
00:19:56,763 --> 00:20:00,967
Who made contributions
Well into their latter years.
452
00:20:00,967 --> 00:20:03,002
Listen to this.
453
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:06,439
"Leo tolstoy.
454
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:08,275
"Albert schweitzer,
455
00:20:08,275 --> 00:20:10,977
"Grandma moses.
456
00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:12,379
"Bertrand russell.
457
00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:14,113
Picasso, goethe."
458
00:20:14,113 --> 00:20:15,682
Oh, now,
He's my favorite.
459
00:20:15,682 --> 00:20:17,950
Yeah. Mine, too.
Mine, too.
460
00:20:17,950 --> 00:20:19,286
He...
461
00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:26,293
What are you doing?
462
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:28,094
I just thought
I'd make the room
463
00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:29,662
Look a little
More romantic.
464
00:20:29,662 --> 00:20:31,931
You keep reading.
You go right ahead.
465
00:20:31,931 --> 00:20:35,402
Oh, sam,
This is wonderful.
466
00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:38,871
An old person wouldn't
Be doing this.
467
00:20:38,871 --> 00:20:40,807
This is the act
468
00:20:40,807 --> 00:20:44,076
Of a vital, strong,
Young man...
469
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:45,978
Who wants a woman.
470
00:20:45,978 --> 00:20:47,547
Who wants sex.
471
00:20:47,547 --> 00:20:49,549
Who won't get it.
472
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:57,924
But this is a very
Positive sign.
473
00:20:57,924 --> 00:20:59,326
Aw, hey, come on.
474
00:20:59,326 --> 00:21:01,428
This is the chance
Of a lifetime--
475
00:21:01,428 --> 00:21:04,897
To play doctor
In a real hospital.
476
00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:06,265
Come on.
477
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:08,835
It's tempting,
It's tempting,
But I think not.
478
00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:12,171
I'm going to go now
And let you rest.
479
00:21:12,171 --> 00:21:14,774
Yeah. Hey, listen.
480
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:18,578
I don't want you to make
Too big a deal out of this,
481
00:21:18,578 --> 00:21:20,680
But thank you
Very much for coming.
482
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,282
Your visit helped
A lot today.
483
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:27,420
Well, if we
Can't reach out
484
00:21:27,420 --> 00:21:29,622
In our moment of
Need, if we can't
485
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:32,959
Span the gap
That separates
Each human,
486
00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:34,427
If we can't allow--
487
00:21:34,427 --> 00:21:36,195
Sweetheart,
That's what I meant
488
00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:38,798
By making too big
A deal out of it.
489
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:40,433
Ok.
490
00:21:40,433 --> 00:21:41,801
Bye, sam.
491
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:42,969
Bye-bye.
492
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,007
Oh.
493
00:21:48,007 --> 00:21:49,676
Hi.
494
00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:52,244
Howdy.
495
00:21:52,244 --> 00:21:53,446
Hi.
496
00:21:53,446 --> 00:21:55,448
Thanks. I can
Handle it.
497
00:21:55,448 --> 00:21:58,184
I'm jack turner,
Your new roomie.
498
00:21:58,184 --> 00:21:59,719
Ah. Sam malone.
How you doing?
499
00:21:59,719 --> 00:22:02,655
Great.
Hey, sam malone--
500
00:22:02,655 --> 00:22:04,557
You're the baseball
Player, aren't you?
501
00:22:04,557 --> 00:22:06,258
Yeah. Yeah, that's me.
502
00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:08,995
So, what are you
In for?
503
00:22:08,995 --> 00:22:11,030
Hernia.
504
00:22:11,030 --> 00:22:12,899
Ha ha ha! No kidding.
505
00:22:12,899 --> 00:22:15,802
I had one of those
A couple of years ago.
506
00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:16,803
Huh?
507
00:22:16,803 --> 00:22:19,005
Didn't slow me
Down a bit.
508
00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:20,239
Is that right?
Really?
509
00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:23,275
You and I are
About the same age,
Aren't we?
510
00:22:23,275 --> 00:22:24,777
Yeah, sure.
511
00:22:24,777 --> 00:22:28,147
Ah. Hey. Well, what are
You back here for?
512
00:22:28,147 --> 00:22:29,849
Ah. Bone spur.
513
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:31,017
Ooh, ow.
514
00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:32,118
Yeah.
515
00:22:32,118 --> 00:22:33,586
Sam malone.
516
00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:36,389
I remember seeing
You out at fenway.
517
00:22:36,389 --> 00:22:38,558
Yeah.
Well, it looks like
518
00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:40,560
You've taken pretty good
Care of yourself.
519
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:42,028
Yeah. Yeah.
I work at it.
520
00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:44,564
You're not
Looking too shabby
There yourself.
521
00:22:44,564 --> 00:22:46,699
I can do more pushups now
Than when I was 20.
522
00:22:46,699 --> 00:22:48,435
Me, too. You know?
Me, too. Really.
523
00:22:48,435 --> 00:22:49,869
As a matter of fact,
524
00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:52,138
I haven't
Felt better in
My entire life.
525
00:22:52,138 --> 00:22:55,475
They say a man reaches
His sexual peak at 18.
526
00:22:55,475 --> 00:22:58,545
Bet some 18-year-old
Said that, huh?
527
00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:00,312
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
528
00:23:00,312 --> 00:23:04,517
Come here. The
Nurses cut the ties
On my gown here.
529
00:23:04,517 --> 00:23:05,852
Get out of here!
530
00:23:05,852 --> 00:23:08,721
I'm not kidding!
Ha ha ha!
531
00:23:08,721 --> 00:23:10,222
Hey, here's my gal now.
532
00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:14,093
Hey, judy. Judy, I want
You to meet sam malone.
533
00:23:14,093 --> 00:23:16,128
Isn't she something, sam?
534
00:23:16,128 --> 00:23:18,364
Sure is. Listen,
If you ever want
To dump him,
535
00:23:18,364 --> 00:23:20,366
You can make
A house call
On sammy here
536
00:23:20,366 --> 00:23:21,968
Anytime
You want.
537
00:23:21,968 --> 00:23:25,438
Sam, this is my daughter
You're talking to.
538
00:23:25,438 --> 00:23:27,373
Your daughter?
Really?
539
00:23:27,373 --> 00:23:28,508
Yeah.
540
00:23:28,508 --> 00:23:30,042
Oh...
God, I'm sorry.
541
00:23:30,042 --> 00:23:31,143
That's all right.
542
00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:33,345
Come on. Let's take
A look around, huh?
543
00:23:33,345 --> 00:23:35,548
Nice to meet you, sir.
37445
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