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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,033 Previously on Z Nation. 2 00:00:01,975 --> 00:00:04,442 Made it myself. I call it the Z Whacker. 3 00:00:04,476 --> 00:00:06,811 Well slap my ass and call me Sally. 4 00:00:06,846 --> 00:00:09,413 If it ain't Sketchy McClain. 5 00:00:10,616 --> 00:00:12,183 She's not Cassandra. 6 00:00:12,351 --> 00:00:13,484 Not anymore. 7 00:00:15,587 --> 00:00:17,088 That didn't sound good. 8 00:00:22,794 --> 00:00:23,827 Where's Cassandra? 9 00:00:23,862 --> 00:00:25,395 I mercied her. 10 00:00:25,429 --> 00:00:26,964 I gave her life. 11 00:00:26,998 --> 00:00:29,466 And you had no right to take that away. 12 00:01:01,864 --> 00:01:03,431 Hello, fellows. 13 00:01:03,465 --> 00:01:05,366 A healthy grill is a healthy man. 14 00:01:05,401 --> 00:01:08,070 From the air we breathe to the kisses we impart, 15 00:01:08,104 --> 00:01:11,972 it is our buccal cavity that separates us from the plants. 16 00:01:12,007 --> 00:01:13,841 It is incumbent upon us, therefore, 17 00:01:13,875 --> 00:01:15,943 to service its gatekeepers. 18 00:01:17,779 --> 00:01:21,115 Gentlemen, good day. 19 00:01:23,018 --> 00:01:26,053 My name is Rollie. This is my colleague Cornelius. 20 00:01:26,088 --> 00:01:28,488 Gentlemen, when was the last time you had your teeth cleaned? 21 00:01:28,523 --> 00:01:31,490 Times are never too desperate for self-improvement. 22 00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:33,193 We accept donations. 23 00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:37,097 Food, water, gas, bullets, batteries. We also accept smiles 24 00:01:37,832 --> 00:01:41,601 Please, enjoy the seated experience. 25 00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:55,480 Up you go. 26 00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:03,154 Well you look like you still have some large capable teeth. 27 00:02:03,188 --> 00:02:04,155 That's great news. 28 00:02:04,256 --> 00:02:06,357 How often would you say you floss? 29 00:02:06,391 --> 00:02:08,059 This simple daily ritual can add 30 00:02:08,093 --> 00:02:10,928 years of happiness and productivity. 31 00:02:12,064 --> 00:02:15,566 A healthy mouth is 32 00:02:16,835 --> 00:02:18,669 a healthy life. 33 00:03:05,380 --> 00:03:09,217 The Mississippi sure ain't as mighty as it used to be. 34 00:03:09,251 --> 00:03:12,452 We'll move faster on river than on foot. 35 00:03:12,486 --> 00:03:15,422 We can take this south to Memphis and then head west. 36 00:03:15,456 --> 00:03:18,225 Can't we find another one? 37 00:03:18,259 --> 00:03:19,759 No. 38 00:03:27,268 --> 00:03:29,068 You wanna help us out? 39 00:03:29,102 --> 00:03:31,070 No, I don't. 40 00:03:31,104 --> 00:03:32,371 By the way, I can't swim. 41 00:03:36,776 --> 00:03:37,609 Whoa, whoa. 42 00:03:37,644 --> 00:03:39,678 Easy! I don't want any trouble. 43 00:03:39,847 --> 00:03:40,980 What are you doing here? 44 00:03:41,081 --> 00:03:42,514 It's my boat. 45 00:03:42,615 --> 00:03:43,950 Makes sense. 46 00:03:44,084 --> 00:03:44,850 It's ours now. 47 00:03:44,884 --> 00:03:46,284 What the hell? Now wait a minute. 48 00:03:46,319 --> 00:03:48,686 I don't like this deal. Can we negotiate? 49 00:03:48,721 --> 00:03:49,620 Hey, listen. 50 00:03:49,655 --> 00:03:52,257 Listen, this boat ain't easy to operate. 51 00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:55,260 Well plus, I know the river. The channel patterns. 52 00:03:55,294 --> 00:03:56,895 I'd make a great asset. 53 00:03:56,929 --> 00:03:57,729 Forget it. 54 00:03:57,763 --> 00:03:58,830 You talk too much. 55 00:03:58,865 --> 00:04:01,833 No, no, no, no, no, no, listen. I can keep quiet. 56 00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:03,533 You won't hear a peep. 57 00:04:03,568 --> 00:04:05,769 Can you take us south to Memphis? 58 00:04:05,803 --> 00:04:07,437 Well hell yes. 59 00:04:08,273 --> 00:04:09,539 Let's go. 60 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:12,542 I'll take you to the Gortner Bridge, just north of the city. 61 00:04:12,577 --> 00:04:15,246 Road block on the East side keeps things pretty quiet. 62 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,414 After that, where you headed? East, West? 63 00:04:17,515 --> 00:04:17,982 Shut up. 64 00:04:18,016 --> 00:04:19,349 Sure thing. 65 00:04:19,383 --> 00:04:22,451 Nothing worse than a blabber mouth that won't shut up. 66 00:04:22,486 --> 00:04:24,020 It's kinda like back in the before. 67 00:04:24,054 --> 00:04:25,421 I had this brother in law 68 00:04:25,455 --> 00:04:27,056 Does this thing actually run? 69 00:04:27,091 --> 00:04:30,059 I swear it ran as soon as yesterday. 70 00:04:30,094 --> 00:04:31,560 10K, check the motor. 71 00:04:32,296 --> 00:04:33,863 Oh thank you, young man. 72 00:04:33,898 --> 00:04:35,831 Yeah, I got a stinger in my neck. 73 00:04:35,866 --> 00:04:38,367 A lot of weakness in my upper extremities. 74 00:04:56,684 --> 00:04:58,552 ♪ Have mercy♪ 75 00:05:01,556 --> 00:05:04,195 ♪ Oh, have mercy. ♪ 76 00:05:04,195 --> 00:05:06,049 - Sync and corrected by TheDelta - - www.addic7ed.com - 77 00:05:22,910 --> 00:05:25,245 Hey, I think I know those dudes. 78 00:05:28,714 --> 00:05:30,582 Oh my god. Is that 79 00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:32,284 Sketchy and Skeezy. 80 00:05:32,319 --> 00:05:33,252 Slow down, man. 81 00:05:33,286 --> 00:05:34,019 Slowing down. 82 00:05:34,054 --> 00:05:35,520 Hey, we're not slowing down. 83 00:05:35,555 --> 00:05:37,356 Yeah. For once I agree with him. 84 00:05:37,390 --> 00:05:38,557 Aye aye, sir. 85 00:05:38,591 --> 00:05:41,126 Do what I tell you and slow down. Those are my friends. 86 00:05:41,161 --> 00:05:44,128 Well is that really necessary? 87 00:05:44,163 --> 00:05:45,663 Let's check it out. 88 00:05:45,697 --> 00:05:46,664 Mistake. 89 00:05:46,798 --> 00:05:49,000 Never get off the boat. 90 00:05:51,570 --> 00:05:52,703 Doc! 91 00:05:52,804 --> 00:05:54,672 Well I'll be damned! 92 00:05:54,706 --> 00:05:57,275 Well if it ain't tweedle dee and tweedle dumb-ass. 93 00:05:57,309 --> 00:05:59,710 Oh man. Your guys's timing is perfect. 94 00:05:59,744 --> 00:06:01,178 What happened to him? 95 00:06:01,212 --> 00:06:03,313 He fell in with the wrong crowd. 96 00:06:03,348 --> 00:06:05,715 Hey, kid! You still shooting out the lights? 97 00:06:05,749 --> 00:06:06,616 Yeah. 98 00:06:06,650 --> 00:06:07,951 Great. Help us with this gear, will ya? 99 00:06:07,986 --> 00:06:09,286 You're not bringing that on board. 100 00:06:09,420 --> 00:06:11,188 Sir. With all due respect, 101 00:06:11,222 --> 00:06:14,624 this is valuable booty worth about four weeks of road time. 102 00:06:14,658 --> 00:06:15,959 You get one. 103 00:06:15,994 --> 00:06:19,161 All right, we're taking this one. 104 00:06:19,196 --> 00:06:20,429 Well what about the salt and pepper shakers? 105 00:06:20,464 --> 00:06:21,163 I think they're in this one. 106 00:06:21,198 --> 00:06:23,632 Now or never, boys. 107 00:06:23,666 --> 00:06:26,369 Just so happens you caught us on the upswing. 108 00:06:26,403 --> 00:06:29,638 Long gestating plans have been percolating 109 00:06:29,672 --> 00:06:31,773 and coming into fruition all at once. 110 00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:34,877 It's been a pretty good season for us. 111 00:06:34,911 --> 00:06:36,811 Where the hell'd you find all that stuff? 112 00:06:36,845 --> 00:06:39,114 Oh yeah, we stayed in Memphis for a bit. 113 00:06:39,148 --> 00:06:41,582 Happened by a little bitty place. Maybe you've heard of it. 114 00:06:41,617 --> 00:06:43,584 Former home of the King. 115 00:06:43,619 --> 00:06:45,286 You looted Graceland? 116 00:06:45,321 --> 00:06:46,888 Oh we cleaned the place out. 117 00:06:46,922 --> 00:06:49,757 We had a couple of truckloads of authentic Elvis swag 118 00:06:49,791 --> 00:06:51,859 until we ran into a little bit of trouble. 119 00:06:51,894 --> 00:06:53,994 And if you were all the way in Memphis, 120 00:06:54,029 --> 00:06:55,862 how was it that you ended up here? 121 00:06:55,897 --> 00:06:58,232 Oh we took a river trail up north in Nebraska 122 00:06:58,266 --> 00:07:01,968 where we ran into some angry Albanians who did not like us. 123 00:07:02,070 --> 00:07:03,970 Skeezy here damn near lost a leg. 124 00:07:04,005 --> 00:07:05,039 What happened? 125 00:07:05,073 --> 00:07:07,207 They were gonna chop off my leg. 126 00:07:07,242 --> 00:07:08,409 Damn. 127 00:07:08,443 --> 00:07:11,844 It was nothing a little bit of discourse couldn't amend. 128 00:07:11,945 --> 00:07:13,346 We're all just animals 129 00:07:14,481 --> 00:07:16,115 looking for a connection. 130 00:07:16,216 --> 00:07:20,019 Oh and plus we got them with "The Murphy." 131 00:07:20,987 --> 00:07:21,754 Excuse me? 132 00:07:21,788 --> 00:07:23,956 Yeah, it's just this thing we do. 133 00:07:23,990 --> 00:07:26,591 It works cuz of Skeezy's passing resemblance. 134 00:07:26,692 --> 00:07:28,126 Resemblance? 135 00:07:28,161 --> 00:07:32,364 That so? And what exactly does "The Murphy" look like? 136 00:07:32,998 --> 00:07:34,533 Over seven feet tall. 137 00:07:34,900 --> 00:07:36,034 Red eyes. 138 00:07:36,069 --> 00:07:37,669 Teeth like a mountain goat. 139 00:07:37,703 --> 00:07:39,538 He walks around on all fours. 140 00:07:39,572 --> 00:07:41,806 And he can blend into his surroundings like a chameleon. 141 00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:44,308 Yeah, when we saw him in Louisiana, he was green as moss. 142 00:07:44,342 --> 00:07:48,912 We saw him again a week later in Texas, and he looked like dirt. 143 00:07:48,947 --> 00:07:49,980 You don't say. 144 00:07:50,014 --> 00:07:51,949 He's dangerous as all hell. 145 00:07:51,983 --> 00:07:54,718 I saw him turn a man inside out using his mind. 146 00:07:54,752 --> 00:07:58,089 Literally. Guy's spleen just hanging out over his waistband. 147 00:07:58,123 --> 00:07:59,123 Most people don't understand 148 00:08:00,257 --> 00:08:02,725 Oh, I understand. You two are a a couple of lying morons 149 00:08:02,759 --> 00:08:05,295 who spoiled a rather pleasant boat ride. 150 00:08:05,396 --> 00:08:06,429 I resent that. 151 00:08:06,464 --> 00:08:07,097 I've heard enough. 152 00:08:07,131 --> 00:08:08,164 I'm throwing you both over. 153 00:08:08,199 --> 00:08:09,599 No, no, no. Whoa, take it easy. Come on. 154 00:08:09,633 --> 00:08:10,600 Come on, now. 155 00:08:10,634 --> 00:08:11,601 You can't throw us in. 156 00:08:11,635 --> 00:08:14,070 Look, there's zombie jams down river, okay? 157 00:08:14,105 --> 00:08:15,771 It'd be like feeding us to piranhas. 158 00:08:15,806 --> 00:08:17,739 Your stories just get dumber and dumber. 159 00:08:17,773 --> 00:08:19,108 No, no, no, it's true. It's true. 160 00:08:19,142 --> 00:08:20,275 All up and down the Mississippi. 161 00:08:20,310 --> 00:08:22,578 They start in Lake Onalaska and they drift down. 162 00:08:22,612 --> 00:08:23,412 Boys. 163 00:08:23,446 --> 00:08:24,779 You're just digging a deeper hole. 164 00:08:24,814 --> 00:08:26,948 I swear on my mother's eyes, Doc. 165 00:08:29,586 --> 00:08:31,220 Zombie jam. 166 00:08:32,989 --> 00:08:33,788 I told you! 167 00:08:33,823 --> 00:08:35,089 Nobody ever believes us! 168 00:08:39,528 --> 00:08:41,162 Guess we woke them up. 169 00:08:48,857 --> 00:08:50,390 Zombies on board! 170 00:08:51,926 --> 00:08:53,392 Bail out! 171 00:09:24,257 --> 00:09:25,824 Doc! 172 00:09:26,992 --> 00:09:28,959 Warren! 173 00:09:57,421 --> 00:09:58,988 Where's your buddy? 174 00:09:59,290 --> 00:10:00,389 Curtains. 175 00:10:00,724 --> 00:10:02,557 Saw him go down. 176 00:10:02,725 --> 00:10:06,261 He chose to sink while you and I chose to swim. 177 00:10:06,296 --> 00:10:08,230 You know they say that drowning is actually a pretty good 178 00:10:08,264 --> 00:10:09,731 way to go, which I would hope for. 179 00:10:09,765 --> 00:10:12,034 Even though he's a coward for leaving me in the lurch. 180 00:10:12,068 --> 00:10:13,035 You see my friends? 181 00:10:13,069 --> 00:10:14,436 They were swimming west. 182 00:10:15,471 --> 00:10:16,939 You saw this? 183 00:10:16,973 --> 00:10:18,272 With my own eyes. 184 00:10:22,711 --> 00:10:24,445 What about the blue guy? 185 00:10:24,479 --> 00:10:25,612 Sunk to the bottom. 186 00:10:25,647 --> 00:10:27,014 Are you positive? 187 00:10:27,049 --> 00:10:28,316 Oh yeah. 188 00:10:28,350 --> 00:10:31,485 He's getting turned away at the pearly gates right about now. 189 00:10:31,519 --> 00:10:32,286 Doc? 190 00:10:33,521 --> 00:10:36,022 Look man, I can't be sure. Okay? 191 00:10:36,357 --> 00:10:37,757 Hey, you make fire? 192 00:10:37,791 --> 00:10:38,825 Yeah. 193 00:10:38,860 --> 00:10:40,393 Well you and I should stick together for a bit, 194 00:10:40,427 --> 00:10:41,694 watch each other's backs. 195 00:10:41,729 --> 00:10:43,629 I mean guys like you in these parts 196 00:10:43,664 --> 00:10:45,298 You're gonna get taken advantage of. You know what I mean? 197 00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:46,166 That's not gonna happen. 198 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:48,034 Yeah, well I'll make sure it don't. 199 00:10:48,069 --> 00:10:49,302 What about you? 200 00:10:49,337 --> 00:10:50,203 I won't touch you. 201 00:10:50,238 --> 00:10:51,871 Can you make fire? 202 00:10:51,905 --> 00:10:53,339 Look, don't patronize me. 203 00:10:53,373 --> 00:10:55,174 I'm not playing little games with you, boy. 204 00:10:55,208 --> 00:10:56,275 I am the fire! 205 00:11:01,781 --> 00:11:03,515 He's cut in half! 206 00:11:03,549 --> 00:11:04,583 Oh dear Lord! 207 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:08,687 I can't do it. I can't do it. Mercy him. 208 00:11:08,721 --> 00:11:10,288 Wait! 209 00:11:12,657 --> 00:11:14,692 Give him a warrior's death. 210 00:11:16,595 --> 00:11:17,461 Oh God. 211 00:11:17,496 --> 00:11:19,264 Hey! Cut it out! Cut it out! Cut it out! 212 00:11:19,298 --> 00:11:20,365 Come on. Do it! 213 00:11:20,399 --> 00:11:23,834 Stop! I fell in a damn hole! 214 00:11:23,869 --> 00:11:24,969 Oh. 215 00:11:25,004 --> 00:11:27,137 Get me outta here. 216 00:11:28,973 --> 00:11:29,839 I thought you said he chose 217 00:11:29,874 --> 00:11:31,441 Hey. Shut up, kid. 218 00:11:31,475 --> 00:11:32,442 What'd you say? 219 00:11:32,476 --> 00:11:33,743 You know I said 220 00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:36,713 we need to find my best friend and get out of here. 221 00:11:36,747 --> 00:11:38,681 Cuz there's human traffickers in these parts. 222 00:11:38,716 --> 00:11:40,384 Oh that's true actually. 223 00:11:40,584 --> 00:11:41,785 Hey, where you going, kid? 224 00:11:41,819 --> 00:11:42,452 We just got here. 225 00:11:42,486 --> 00:11:44,420 I'm better off on my own. 226 00:11:44,587 --> 00:11:45,788 I need to find my friends. 227 00:11:45,822 --> 00:11:47,656 We're on the East side of the Mississippi. 228 00:11:47,690 --> 00:11:49,926 As I recall, your friends were heading West. 229 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,128 If they were alive, and that's a big if, 230 00:11:52,162 --> 00:11:53,729 they ain't heading East. 231 00:11:53,763 --> 00:11:55,231 Then I'll find my way West. 232 00:11:55,265 --> 00:11:58,000 Now the only way West is south of here, Gortner Bridge. 233 00:11:58,035 --> 00:11:59,001 Look, kid. 234 00:11:59,036 --> 00:12:00,068 You want to find your friends, come with us. 235 00:12:00,102 --> 00:12:00,969 We're heading South. 236 00:12:01,003 --> 00:12:03,405 Safety in numbers. Trust me on that. 237 00:12:03,439 --> 00:12:05,773 Walk life's journey with us, young man. 238 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,575 Learn the ways of the world from two gentlemen 239 00:12:07,609 --> 00:12:09,044 who've been there, done that. 240 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:11,279 Yeah. Besides, we'll get you laid for sure. 241 00:12:14,550 --> 00:12:16,517 Okay, fine. We'll let you come with us. 242 00:12:16,552 --> 00:12:19,453 You're in charge of making fires though. 243 00:12:23,591 --> 00:12:25,359 10K! 244 00:12:26,027 --> 00:12:27,794 10K! 245 00:12:28,496 --> 00:12:30,897 Kid! Can you hear us?! 246 00:12:30,932 --> 00:12:33,467 Send a smoke signal! 247 00:12:35,135 --> 00:12:36,235 I'm going across. 248 00:12:36,270 --> 00:12:36,769 Doc. 249 00:12:36,803 --> 00:12:37,971 You won't make it. 250 00:12:38,005 --> 00:12:39,339 We have to get him. 251 00:12:39,373 --> 00:12:40,606 No. We don't. 252 00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:42,908 And what makes you think he's on the other side anyway? 253 00:12:42,943 --> 00:12:45,678 That kid's a survivor! He ain't going out like that! 254 00:12:45,712 --> 00:12:48,081 Yeah. As romantic as that sounds, 255 00:12:48,115 --> 00:12:49,548 that is not much to go on. 256 00:12:49,583 --> 00:12:51,049 Well I don't care. I'm going after him. 257 00:12:51,084 --> 00:12:53,718 That's the East side of the Mississippi you're talking about 258 00:12:53,752 --> 00:12:54,586 Yeah. So? 259 00:12:54,620 --> 00:12:55,988 I'm heading West. So is he. 260 00:12:56,022 --> 00:12:57,089 Oh is that right? 261 00:12:57,123 --> 00:12:57,789 Doc. 262 00:12:57,823 --> 00:12:58,857 You're not going back in there. 263 00:12:58,891 --> 00:13:00,558 What are we gonna do, Warren?! Leave him?! 264 00:13:00,593 --> 00:13:01,659 Hey, hey. 265 00:13:01,694 --> 00:13:03,061 We're not gonna leave him. 266 00:13:03,096 --> 00:13:05,597 Look, he probably just floated downstream. Right? 267 00:13:06,199 --> 00:13:07,632 So let's head South. 268 00:13:07,666 --> 00:13:09,733 We'll find a spot. We'll camp out. 269 00:13:09,767 --> 00:13:11,969 There's only one direction he could've gone. 270 00:13:12,004 --> 00:13:13,737 We'll stay on the river's edge. 271 00:13:13,771 --> 00:13:16,507 If he's on the other side, he'll give us a signal. 272 00:13:16,541 --> 00:13:18,442 Well what about getting Murphy to California? 273 00:13:18,477 --> 00:13:20,111 Yeah. What about that? 274 00:13:20,145 --> 00:13:23,314 We'll put in 24 hours of looking for him. 275 00:13:23,815 --> 00:13:25,615 And then we head West. 276 00:13:30,054 --> 00:13:31,888 It's like my daddy always told me. 277 00:13:31,922 --> 00:13:33,823 Never trust an Eskimo in a windbreaker. 278 00:13:33,857 --> 00:13:36,426 And he would know cuz he was in the Merchant Marines. 279 00:13:36,460 --> 00:13:37,860 You boys lost? 280 00:13:38,496 --> 00:13:40,497 Certainly not. Matter of fact 281 00:13:40,531 --> 00:13:44,400 Oh, no? Cuz either you lost or you're trespassing. 282 00:13:44,501 --> 00:13:45,901 Which one is it? 283 00:13:46,102 --> 00:13:48,003 Well I was not aware they had changed the property lines 284 00:13:48,038 --> 00:13:49,238 since the last time we came through. 285 00:13:49,272 --> 00:13:50,506 Wasn't no last time. 286 00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:52,474 Cuz I woulda recognized you. 287 00:13:52,509 --> 00:13:53,575 Well I've been growing my hair out. 288 00:13:53,609 --> 00:13:54,376 No. 289 00:13:54,411 --> 00:13:56,578 I'm pretty sure you ain't from here. 290 00:13:56,612 --> 00:13:58,414 Am I right, Dale? 291 00:13:58,448 --> 00:13:59,647 I'm pretty sure not. 292 00:13:59,681 --> 00:14:01,182 We were just on our 293 00:14:02,017 --> 00:14:04,785 How 'bout emptying them pockets first? 294 00:14:04,819 --> 00:14:05,553 Well, 295 00:14:05,921 --> 00:14:08,022 caught us on a slow day, boys. 296 00:14:08,057 --> 00:14:09,457 Sorry to disappoint. 297 00:14:09,491 --> 00:14:10,091 Like he said. 298 00:14:10,125 --> 00:14:10,758 Hey, what's the hurry? 299 00:14:10,792 --> 00:14:11,592 Look. 300 00:14:11,626 --> 00:14:12,993 We got off on the wrong foot here. 301 00:14:13,028 --> 00:14:15,129 You obviously look like intelligent men 302 00:14:15,164 --> 00:14:17,964 with an eye towards progress in future generations. 303 00:14:17,998 --> 00:14:21,168 What if I told you today's your lucky day? 304 00:14:21,202 --> 00:14:23,270 Oh, I would agree. Ain't that right, Dale? 305 00:14:23,304 --> 00:14:24,871 Oh you right about that. 306 00:14:24,905 --> 00:14:26,106 You're both right. 307 00:14:26,140 --> 00:14:29,676 Cuz it ain't everyday you come in contact with a modern miracle 308 00:14:30,445 --> 00:14:32,479 Your maker's been smiling on you 309 00:14:32,513 --> 00:14:36,082 because today I offer you the most rare and precious 310 00:14:36,116 --> 00:14:37,383 of currencies. 311 00:14:37,784 --> 00:14:39,751 Everlasting life. 312 00:14:40,253 --> 00:14:42,088 What's he talking about? 313 00:14:42,122 --> 00:14:45,891 Well... if you're interested... we've got 314 00:14:45,925 --> 00:14:47,259 You got a stuttering problem?! 315 00:14:47,294 --> 00:14:48,494 Well yes he does. 316 00:14:48,528 --> 00:14:49,995 And he's actually very self conscious about it. So please 317 00:14:50,029 --> 00:14:53,398 Let's just kill them. Oh then I guess you've never heard of "The Murphy." 318 00:14:53,599 --> 00:14:55,166 All right, fine. You don't want to see him. 319 00:14:55,201 --> 00:14:57,001 Oh I've heard of "The Murphy" all right. 320 00:14:57,035 --> 00:14:58,269 Seen him even. 321 00:14:58,304 --> 00:15:00,871 You've seen "The Murphy," huh? What's he look like? 322 00:15:00,906 --> 00:15:02,773 Uh, he's a taller fella. 323 00:15:02,808 --> 00:15:04,742 T...t... taller fella, really? 324 00:15:04,776 --> 00:15:06,877 Taller fella, skinny as a bean pole? 325 00:15:06,912 --> 00:15:10,880 Short scraggly hair? Dark blotches on his skin? 326 00:15:14,352 --> 00:15:16,620 Oh it's him. I knew it. 327 00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:17,921 Wait a second. 328 00:15:17,955 --> 00:15:19,456 That's right. You've got me. 329 00:15:19,491 --> 00:15:20,991 If you're "The Murphy," 330 00:15:21,126 --> 00:15:22,392 then let me see you levitate. 331 00:15:22,427 --> 00:15:23,860 Oh come on. Who said he could levitate? 332 00:15:23,894 --> 00:15:24,660 He can! 333 00:15:24,694 --> 00:15:26,429 Not on an empty stomach. 334 00:15:26,463 --> 00:15:27,263 That's true? 335 00:15:27,297 --> 00:15:29,499 I'll tell you what is true. 336 00:15:29,533 --> 00:15:31,467 He can make you immortal. 337 00:15:31,768 --> 00:15:32,535 What's that? 338 00:15:32,569 --> 00:15:33,936 Reset your odometer. 339 00:15:33,970 --> 00:15:35,404 Make you zombie proof. 340 00:15:35,439 --> 00:15:36,705 Zombie proof? 341 00:15:38,442 --> 00:15:39,375 Prove it. 342 00:15:40,544 --> 00:15:42,744 As I said, it's no accident we're through these parts. 343 00:15:42,778 --> 00:15:43,878 We're wanderers. 344 00:15:43,912 --> 00:15:46,981 Trying to cure this wretched land of disease and sin. 345 00:15:47,016 --> 00:15:48,617 One bite at a time. 346 00:15:48,651 --> 00:15:50,285 What do you mean bite? 347 00:15:50,453 --> 00:15:52,053 I'm glad you asked. 348 00:15:52,087 --> 00:15:53,455 You wanna be immortal, 349 00:15:53,489 --> 00:15:56,458 well Murphy here has got to bite you. 350 00:15:56,925 --> 00:16:00,161 But everything comes at a price. And it looks like 351 00:16:00,195 --> 00:16:04,031 you got plenty to go around in that there wagon of yours. 352 00:16:04,499 --> 00:16:07,134 Maybe not. But you got to ask yourself 353 00:16:07,402 --> 00:16:10,471 how much is eternal life worth to you? 354 00:16:11,973 --> 00:16:15,741 Hold him still, boys! He moves too much, it ain't gonna work. 355 00:16:15,776 --> 00:16:16,442 Why not? 356 00:16:16,477 --> 00:16:17,877 Uh, cuz the muscles tense up. 357 00:16:17,911 --> 00:16:19,912 It releases an acid that counteracts the venom. 358 00:16:19,946 --> 00:16:21,047 Hold still, Dale! 359 00:16:21,081 --> 00:16:21,914 I'm trying! 360 00:16:21,948 --> 00:16:25,185 Close your eyes! Think good thoughts. 361 00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:28,588 Just do it already! Just do it! 362 00:16:28,622 --> 00:16:30,089 You heard him! 363 00:16:30,257 --> 00:16:31,591 Oww! Oww! 364 00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:32,824 Hold still, Dale! 365 00:16:33,759 --> 00:16:35,160 Hold still, Dale! 366 00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:40,365 Hold still! You're halfway to a life of no worries! 367 00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,534 Hang on, Dale! Ride that bull! 368 00:16:42,569 --> 00:16:44,369 Ride that bull! Hang on, Dale! 369 00:16:47,973 --> 00:16:49,273 Son of a bitch! 370 00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:52,710 Well that's it. 371 00:16:54,313 --> 00:16:55,613 How do you feel? 372 00:16:59,418 --> 00:17:00,685 I'm cured! 373 00:17:01,620 --> 00:17:02,786 I'm cured! 374 00:17:04,489 --> 00:17:06,723 Murphy! You all right? 375 00:17:08,326 --> 00:17:11,728 Takes a little bit out of him every time. Who's next? 376 00:17:16,367 --> 00:17:18,167 We sure do appreciate this. 377 00:17:18,202 --> 00:17:19,969 Fair is fair. 378 00:17:20,504 --> 00:17:21,504 Now like I said, 379 00:17:21,539 --> 00:17:23,939 you're gonna want to rest up for at least 12 hours. 380 00:17:23,973 --> 00:17:25,541 You need to metabolize that venom. 381 00:17:25,575 --> 00:17:27,543 Uh now, can we clean the wound? 382 00:17:27,577 --> 00:17:30,212 Not unless you want to reverse the whole process, Dale. 383 00:17:30,247 --> 00:17:31,847 You heard him, Dale. Don't touch it! 384 00:17:31,881 --> 00:17:33,482 And no physical activity. 385 00:17:33,516 --> 00:17:38,254 You must remain perfectly still for 48 hours. 386 00:17:58,005 --> 00:18:00,073 Did you see that?! 387 00:18:00,742 --> 00:18:01,775 See what? 388 00:18:01,809 --> 00:18:04,344 A light. A light was flashing right down river. 389 00:18:04,379 --> 00:18:06,480 So you saw a light. What does that mean? 390 00:18:06,514 --> 00:18:09,616 10K, he signaled us. Did anybody see it? 391 00:18:10,017 --> 00:18:11,985 Roberta, you saw it, didn't you? 392 00:18:12,119 --> 00:18:12,986 No. 393 00:18:13,020 --> 00:18:15,254 Well how can I be the only one to see it? 394 00:18:15,289 --> 00:18:17,790 Maybe cuz there's nothing to see. 395 00:18:17,824 --> 00:18:20,159 We've gone far enough South. We head West in the morning. 396 00:18:20,193 --> 00:18:22,361 Who put you in charge? 397 00:18:22,763 --> 00:18:24,363 You're losing your head. 398 00:18:24,864 --> 00:18:25,698 Jeopardizing the mission. 399 00:18:25,732 --> 00:18:27,032 What do you know about the mission? 400 00:18:27,066 --> 00:18:28,967 You're just here collecting a bounty. 401 00:18:30,537 --> 00:18:33,204 I mean, who the hell are you anyway? 402 00:18:33,238 --> 00:18:34,639 Why are we dragging him along? 403 00:18:34,674 --> 00:18:36,140 Let's not get it twisted, old man. 404 00:18:36,175 --> 00:18:38,343 I'm escorting this prisoner to California. 405 00:18:38,377 --> 00:18:40,077 And I'm not putting him in danger 406 00:18:40,112 --> 00:18:41,746 without a damn good reason. 407 00:18:41,847 --> 00:18:43,381 This is not one of those reasons. 408 00:18:43,416 --> 00:18:45,684 Yeah, well it ain't up to you. 409 00:18:46,285 --> 00:18:48,119 Want to find out if it is? 410 00:18:48,153 --> 00:18:50,454 Settle down. 411 00:18:51,356 --> 00:18:52,889 Nothing's happening tonight. 412 00:18:52,924 --> 00:18:56,427 And in the morning we'll reevaluate. 413 00:18:58,830 --> 00:19:00,397 You don't believe me? 414 00:19:00,432 --> 00:19:01,665 I believe you. 415 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:04,935 Come on, Doc. Don't let this take you down. 416 00:19:04,969 --> 00:19:06,969 We push on. 417 00:19:07,904 --> 00:19:09,939 We survive. 418 00:19:10,140 --> 00:19:11,907 That's all we can do. 419 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,511 Maybe I'm tired of pushing on. 420 00:19:15,846 --> 00:19:16,979 Hey. 421 00:19:18,014 --> 00:19:19,549 I know. 422 00:19:21,518 --> 00:19:23,985 Get some sleep. 423 00:19:39,995 --> 00:19:42,730 Opportunity presents itself just as I suspected. 424 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:44,598 I'm telling you, kid. You must be magic. 425 00:19:44,633 --> 00:19:46,866 There is no end to our good luck since we met you. 426 00:19:46,901 --> 00:19:49,769 It's true. And it runs in my family. 427 00:19:49,803 --> 00:19:53,340 My uncle Gerald's been struck by lightning three times. 428 00:19:53,774 --> 00:19:55,142 Keys! 429 00:19:55,176 --> 00:19:57,044 I'm starting to believe you guys. 430 00:20:37,282 --> 00:20:40,417 Well we thought you mighta ran into some trouble. 431 00:20:41,286 --> 00:20:42,352 Just the usual. 432 00:20:42,620 --> 00:20:47,023 Usually you're right on time. But don't matter. 433 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,563 Uh. Swenson, get these old boys a drink. 434 00:20:52,997 --> 00:20:56,599 I don't think we've met. It's usually the other two. 435 00:20:56,700 --> 00:20:59,602 Those two clowns, former employees. 436 00:20:59,836 --> 00:21:02,338 It's the price you pay for delegating responsibility. 437 00:21:02,372 --> 00:21:03,806 But that's not your problem. 438 00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:06,209 Oh yeah, it's hard to find good help. 439 00:21:06,243 --> 00:21:07,910 We apologize on their behalf. 440 00:21:07,944 --> 00:21:11,012 That is not necessary. So, 441 00:21:11,046 --> 00:21:12,614 how'd we do? 442 00:21:13,416 --> 00:21:16,084 Been better, been worse. 443 00:21:16,119 --> 00:21:18,587 Ain't that the truth. 444 00:21:19,088 --> 00:21:20,722 You get a drink, son? 445 00:21:20,756 --> 00:21:22,790 Ah, no, no, no, no, no. Kid's a mute. 446 00:21:22,825 --> 00:21:23,791 Fell on his head as a baby. 447 00:21:23,826 --> 00:21:25,227 But get him something stiff. 448 00:21:25,261 --> 00:21:27,194 All right. We can get him something strong. 449 00:21:27,229 --> 00:21:29,863 Okay, hey! One more for the mute! 450 00:21:35,937 --> 00:21:37,771 Pretty good my ass! 451 00:21:37,805 --> 00:21:40,741 Well look, you done outdone yourselves! 452 00:21:40,842 --> 00:21:42,009 Apparently we have. 453 00:21:42,244 --> 00:21:42,843 Oh. 454 00:21:43,278 --> 00:21:45,378 I have been a rude host. 455 00:21:45,412 --> 00:21:50,283 I haven't even introduced myself. My name is Tyler Burr. 456 00:21:50,384 --> 00:21:53,553 This is my town. Burrtown. 457 00:21:53,754 --> 00:21:54,454 Fitting. 458 00:21:54,588 --> 00:21:55,054 Yeah. 459 00:21:55,088 --> 00:21:55,821 Mr. Burr. 460 00:21:55,856 --> 00:21:57,524 Mr. Smithson. 461 00:21:57,691 --> 00:21:59,259 This is my associate, Geronimo. 462 00:21:59,293 --> 00:22:01,793 His granddaddy's part Apache. 463 00:22:01,827 --> 00:22:04,263 And this is our old boy, Renfield. 464 00:22:04,297 --> 00:22:06,365 We found him tied to a tree in Kentucky. 465 00:22:06,399 --> 00:22:08,200 Well 466 00:22:08,234 --> 00:22:11,570 My family came over on the Mayflower, Mr. Smithson. 467 00:22:11,604 --> 00:22:14,105 And we enjoyed a pretty good run of it too. 468 00:22:14,140 --> 00:22:16,941 Until it all went to hell in a handbasket. 469 00:22:16,976 --> 00:22:18,509 Damn apocalypse. 470 00:22:18,544 --> 00:22:22,380 Oh, I'm talking about the War of Northern Aggression. 471 00:22:22,514 --> 00:22:26,850 Fortunately what we have created here is a return to the glory. 472 00:22:26,885 --> 00:22:28,686 Made with our own hands. 473 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,656 And that is what this country is built on. 474 00:22:32,123 --> 00:22:33,924 Manufacturing. 475 00:22:33,958 --> 00:22:35,925 With able bodied individuals, 476 00:22:35,959 --> 00:22:40,063 transformed by God himself into builders, 477 00:22:40,164 --> 00:22:43,066 growers, energy creators. 478 00:22:43,401 --> 00:22:45,635 We have electricity. 479 00:22:45,936 --> 00:22:48,305 A working distillery. 480 00:22:48,539 --> 00:22:52,641 And a community that keeps an eye on one another. 481 00:22:53,109 --> 00:22:58,447 We do not allow the afflicted to drag us into the mud. 482 00:22:58,481 --> 00:22:59,648 No sir. 483 00:22:59,683 --> 00:23:03,452 We wrangle them, tame them, and turn them into a workforce. 484 00:23:03,486 --> 00:23:05,554 You're a man of vision, Mr. Burr. 485 00:23:05,589 --> 00:23:08,657 Well it's all about protection, Mr. Smithson. 486 00:23:08,692 --> 00:23:12,193 Without protection, this world's got no use for you. 487 00:23:12,228 --> 00:23:14,161 It's as I always say. 488 00:23:14,196 --> 00:23:18,165 You only need one friend, so long as it's the right friend. 489 00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,035 Oh I've said so myself many times before. 490 00:23:21,069 --> 00:23:23,304 You pay the piper, the piper keeps you safe. 491 00:23:23,339 --> 00:23:25,873 Facilitates a life of recreation. 492 00:23:25,907 --> 00:23:27,941 You're gonna have to give me your friend's number. 493 00:23:32,580 --> 00:23:35,014 Any friend of mine is a friend of his. 494 00:23:35,049 --> 00:23:38,051 So enjoy some moonshine and some women, 495 00:23:38,085 --> 00:23:40,320 both of which we have in abundance, 496 00:23:40,355 --> 00:23:44,523 before you get back to your recruiting tour. 497 00:23:44,558 --> 00:23:45,625 Appreciate the offer, Mr. Burr. 498 00:23:45,659 --> 00:23:47,793 But me and my friends are on a very tight schedule. 499 00:23:47,827 --> 00:23:50,730 We're gonna stay the night. Road will be too dark. 500 00:23:50,764 --> 00:23:51,464 It's noon. 501 00:23:51,565 --> 00:23:53,232 Eventually it's gonna be dark. 502 00:23:53,267 --> 00:23:55,434 Well so true. So true. 503 00:23:55,469 --> 00:23:59,372 My friends, let's freshen up those drinks. 504 00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:03,241 Make sure you treat these boys right. 505 00:24:06,845 --> 00:24:09,547 Oh sweet Jesus, hallelujah. 506 00:24:09,582 --> 00:24:12,450 Now we can get across the damn river and find the kid. 507 00:24:12,485 --> 00:24:13,451 Oh come on. 508 00:24:13,486 --> 00:24:14,452 You really think you're gonna get this thing 509 00:24:14,487 --> 00:24:15,587 all the way across? 510 00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:16,921 I'm sure as hell gonna try. 511 00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:17,621 Doc. 512 00:24:17,656 --> 00:24:18,889 Don't waste your breath, Warren. 513 00:24:18,923 --> 00:24:20,457 I'm going after him. 514 00:24:20,492 --> 00:24:21,925 You do what you got to do, but I'm going. 515 00:24:21,959 --> 00:24:23,059 What do you expect us to do? 516 00:24:23,094 --> 00:24:23,794 Wait for you? 517 00:24:23,828 --> 00:24:25,061 Do whatever you want. 518 00:24:25,096 --> 00:24:26,129 Then we head West. 519 00:24:26,164 --> 00:24:28,198 Am I the only one that cares that 10K is out there?! 520 00:24:28,232 --> 00:24:28,965 Of course not! 521 00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:29,933 I'm sorry. 522 00:24:29,967 --> 00:24:31,101 I thought there was a mission 523 00:24:31,135 --> 00:24:34,271 that dictated our each and every action, and that anything 524 00:24:34,971 --> 00:24:35,738 anything 525 00:24:36,707 --> 00:24:38,941 was justifiable in service of the mission. 526 00:24:38,975 --> 00:24:41,711 We take care of each other. That's how we got this far. 527 00:24:41,745 --> 00:24:43,579 Without that, there is no mission! 528 00:24:43,614 --> 00:24:45,981 Tell that to Cassandra, Doc. 529 00:24:47,150 --> 00:24:48,685 Or was she expendable? 530 00:24:48,719 --> 00:24:50,286 He did what he had to do. 531 00:24:50,321 --> 00:24:51,520 Bullshit. 532 00:24:51,554 --> 00:24:52,754 He's a child with a gun 533 00:24:52,789 --> 00:24:54,690 who kills anything he doesn't understand. 534 00:24:54,724 --> 00:24:56,458 And let's not forget. 535 00:24:56,492 --> 00:24:59,093 Each and every one of you is expendable. 536 00:24:59,862 --> 00:25:03,164 There's only one piece of precious cargo on this train. 537 00:25:03,199 --> 00:25:05,701 Well, brother. At least we all know where we stand. 538 00:25:05,735 --> 00:25:06,802 Hey, 539 00:25:07,169 --> 00:25:08,436 it's not personal. 540 00:25:09,771 --> 00:25:11,004 Doc. 541 00:25:11,039 --> 00:25:13,907 Are you willing to throw it all away right here? 542 00:25:14,643 --> 00:25:17,010 Yeah. Yeah, I am. 543 00:25:18,714 --> 00:25:21,315 We'll head South as far as the Gortner Bridge. 544 00:25:21,350 --> 00:25:23,718 If you're there, we'll regroup. 545 00:25:24,319 --> 00:25:25,785 Otherwise, 546 00:25:27,955 --> 00:25:29,656 this is it. 547 00:25:47,407 --> 00:25:49,375 Let's go. 548 00:25:52,545 --> 00:25:56,915 I told you. I told you Elvis was still alive. 549 00:25:56,949 --> 00:26:00,418 Oh he's alive all right. And he's kept the weight off too. 550 00:26:00,452 --> 00:26:02,387 Tell him, Renfield. 551 00:26:03,088 --> 00:26:05,490 What's he saying? What's he saying? 552 00:26:05,524 --> 00:26:08,726 Well you don't, nevermind, you don't, I dunno. 553 00:26:08,761 --> 00:26:11,295 Okay, he's talking about this time 554 00:26:11,329 --> 00:26:13,531 when we did this thing that happened. 555 00:26:14,199 --> 00:26:15,500 Amazing! 556 00:26:16,768 --> 00:26:18,134 I can't even believe it. 557 00:26:18,168 --> 00:26:20,637 Well he's hard to believe at this point. 558 00:26:20,671 --> 00:26:23,407 I got so many questions. 559 00:26:23,441 --> 00:26:25,308 How old is Elvis? 560 00:26:25,342 --> 00:26:27,176 He doesn't look a day over 60. 561 00:26:29,113 --> 00:26:30,747 Give me one reason. 562 00:26:30,782 --> 00:26:34,283 I don't need much. This world will not miss you. 563 00:26:34,317 --> 00:26:35,918 And you may be skinny, 564 00:26:35,952 --> 00:26:39,789 but that wheel can always use another body. Ain't that right? 565 00:26:39,823 --> 00:26:41,223 You didn't mind doing the devil's work 566 00:26:41,257 --> 00:26:43,025 so long as it suits you. 567 00:26:43,059 --> 00:26:45,193 Luring all those men into your truck. 568 00:26:45,228 --> 00:26:46,562 That all sits right with you? 569 00:26:46,596 --> 00:26:47,730 We didn't kill those men. 570 00:26:47,764 --> 00:26:49,298 So you can talk now, huh? 571 00:26:49,332 --> 00:26:50,165 We stole that truck. 572 00:26:50,199 --> 00:26:52,534 We didn't know what was in the back. 573 00:26:52,568 --> 00:26:55,770 We had nothing to do with capturing those zombies. 574 00:26:55,805 --> 00:26:57,672 My friends, 575 00:26:57,706 --> 00:27:00,241 they're all right. They just, they like to tell stories. 576 00:27:00,275 --> 00:27:01,476 That they do. 577 00:27:01,510 --> 00:27:04,512 I hardly know them actually. I was... I was part of a group. 578 00:27:04,547 --> 00:27:07,415 We were transporting "The Murphy" to California. 579 00:27:07,449 --> 00:27:09,750 You've met "The Murphy?" 580 00:27:10,017 --> 00:27:11,117 Yeah. 581 00:27:11,419 --> 00:27:12,920 What's he like? 582 00:27:12,954 --> 00:27:14,254 He's a jerk. 583 00:27:14,589 --> 00:27:17,390 But the rest of them, they were good people. 584 00:27:17,659 --> 00:27:19,893 We were trying to save the world. 585 00:27:21,295 --> 00:27:22,529 Where are they now? 586 00:27:22,564 --> 00:27:24,064 Well we were headed South on the river. 587 00:27:24,098 --> 00:27:27,266 We hit a zombie jam. I swam ashore, but 588 00:27:27,300 --> 00:27:28,568 We were headed to the Gortner Bridge. 589 00:27:28,602 --> 00:27:30,503 If they're alive, that's where they'll be. 590 00:27:30,537 --> 00:27:31,804 You think they'll wait for you? 591 00:27:31,839 --> 00:27:35,441 I know Doc wouldn't leave me. He'd... he'd think of something. 592 00:27:36,610 --> 00:27:38,277 I had a husband. 593 00:27:38,311 --> 00:27:40,813 Well, second husband actually. 594 00:27:41,481 --> 00:27:44,616 In this world that's all you need, just one other person. 595 00:27:44,650 --> 00:27:46,518 That's reason enough. 596 00:27:48,488 --> 00:27:50,221 He's on that wheel over there. 597 00:27:50,990 --> 00:27:52,591 In purgatory. 598 00:27:55,962 --> 00:27:57,395 I know what it's like 599 00:27:58,030 --> 00:28:00,531 to see somebody you care about and 600 00:28:00,565 --> 00:28:02,666 know that they need mercy. But 601 00:28:03,568 --> 00:28:05,469 actually doing it 602 00:28:06,037 --> 00:28:07,170 Well 603 00:28:07,205 --> 00:28:09,840 this whole town is wicked. 604 00:28:10,041 --> 00:28:13,076 I came here with two thoughts in my mind. 605 00:28:13,111 --> 00:28:16,746 To release the man I love and put him in his rightful place. 606 00:28:17,047 --> 00:28:19,148 And to watch this town burn. 607 00:28:19,583 --> 00:28:21,784 I wouldn't mind seeing that too. 608 00:28:24,421 --> 00:28:28,825 Hey, Renfield! I just found your future ex-wife! 609 00:28:36,198 --> 00:28:39,234 Oh, I think it's about time we took off. 610 00:28:39,435 --> 00:28:42,070 I need to make a call. 611 00:29:01,127 --> 00:29:03,729 Court is in session. 612 00:29:03,764 --> 00:29:08,567 The honorable judge Escorpion presiding. 613 00:29:30,088 --> 00:29:34,959 These fools stand accused of grand larceny, willful deception 614 00:29:34,993 --> 00:29:37,027 and fraud. 615 00:29:38,262 --> 00:29:40,396 In case you were wondering, 616 00:29:40,497 --> 00:29:42,932 I almost broke 80 today. 617 00:29:43,734 --> 00:29:46,069 Not only did you steal from Mr. Burr, 618 00:29:46,103 --> 00:29:48,237 you stole from the Zeros. 619 00:29:48,906 --> 00:29:51,975 And you robbed me of the greatest golf game of my life. 620 00:29:52,009 --> 00:29:54,010 How do you feel about that? 621 00:29:54,177 --> 00:29:55,979 It's disappointing. 622 00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:59,982 Will you be acting as your own counsel? 623 00:30:00,349 --> 00:30:01,617 Uh, 624 00:30:02,418 --> 00:30:03,719 I will, your honor. 625 00:30:04,553 --> 00:30:06,054 How do each of you plead? 626 00:30:06,089 --> 00:30:07,055 Guilty. 627 00:30:07,890 --> 00:30:09,057 With 628 00:30:09,358 --> 00:30:10,592 an explanation. 629 00:30:10,627 --> 00:30:14,495 Objection. This man is a liar and a thief. 630 00:30:14,596 --> 00:30:15,863 Overruled. 631 00:30:15,897 --> 00:30:17,164 Damn. 632 00:30:17,966 --> 00:30:19,566 Please continue. 633 00:30:26,008 --> 00:30:27,875 The path to truth, 634 00:30:27,909 --> 00:30:29,844 it's not a straight line. 635 00:30:30,311 --> 00:30:31,544 It's squiggly. 636 00:30:32,446 --> 00:30:37,150 One man's truth is another man's fallacy. And heretofore within 637 00:30:37,184 --> 00:30:39,085 Bear with me here. 638 00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:41,888 I am reminded of 639 00:30:41,922 --> 00:30:44,858 the case of Dred Scott vs the City of Sacramento. 640 00:30:44,892 --> 00:30:46,292 We all remember that one, right? 641 00:30:46,326 --> 00:30:48,226 I mean, who doesn't? Or 642 00:30:48,261 --> 00:30:51,496 Terry Bradshaw vs the State of Oklahoma? Hello? 643 00:30:51,531 --> 00:30:52,297 Ring a bell? 644 00:30:52,331 --> 00:30:53,165 Objection! 645 00:30:54,333 --> 00:30:56,201 Stop interrupting. 646 00:31:00,506 --> 00:31:04,043 See, it's not my job to educate you on legal precedents. 647 00:31:04,077 --> 00:31:05,176 That could take all day. 648 00:31:05,210 --> 00:31:09,513 But it is my job to illustrate just how the accusers 649 00:31:09,548 --> 00:31:12,616 have attempted to defame and slander myself and my clients 650 00:31:12,651 --> 00:31:16,087 by executing some kind of fancy flea flicker on 651 00:31:16,121 --> 00:31:18,723 the fine citizens of this great town. 652 00:31:21,226 --> 00:31:23,860 I don't believe in the hidden ball trick. 653 00:31:23,895 --> 00:31:25,729 Like these guys. 654 00:31:25,763 --> 00:31:27,297 Now if I'm going up against an opponent, 655 00:31:27,331 --> 00:31:30,433 I'm going right down the middle. He's gonna see me coming, by God 656 00:31:30,467 --> 00:31:32,402 because I like my steak rare! 657 00:31:32,436 --> 00:31:33,136 Yeah! 658 00:31:33,171 --> 00:31:34,504 I like my whiskey straight up! 659 00:31:34,538 --> 00:31:35,505 Woo! 660 00:31:35,539 --> 00:31:38,641 I like my cars fast and my women rough! 661 00:31:41,277 --> 00:31:43,012 I'm an American. 662 00:31:43,513 --> 00:31:44,947 North American. 663 00:31:45,048 --> 00:31:46,849 And I don't apologize for that! 664 00:31:46,883 --> 00:31:48,050 Yeah. 665 00:31:48,085 --> 00:31:51,353 I put my pants on one leg at a time, thank you very much! 666 00:31:54,958 --> 00:31:56,224 America! 667 00:32:12,474 --> 00:32:14,241 Hey, check it out. 668 00:32:14,709 --> 00:32:16,610 You get that thing started? 669 00:32:16,711 --> 00:32:18,612 I'll give it a shot. 670 00:32:18,646 --> 00:32:19,579 Hey. 671 00:32:37,131 --> 00:32:38,731 Doc! 672 00:32:52,812 --> 00:32:55,480 I could walk you all through it again. 673 00:32:56,115 --> 00:32:58,483 The time discrepancy, 674 00:32:58,951 --> 00:33:01,386 the rates of descent, 675 00:33:01,420 --> 00:33:03,255 second shooters, 676 00:33:03,289 --> 00:33:05,589 detonation patterns, 677 00:33:05,623 --> 00:33:07,658 cellular records, 678 00:33:07,692 --> 00:33:09,927 communication towers, 679 00:33:09,961 --> 00:33:12,830 multi-layered encryption, 680 00:33:12,864 --> 00:33:15,099 all of the damn chem trails in the sky. 681 00:33:15,133 --> 00:33:18,836 I mean have you seen that? What is that? That's what I'm asking. 682 00:33:18,870 --> 00:33:19,503 Well those are the 683 00:33:19,537 --> 00:33:21,237 It doesn't matter! 684 00:33:21,772 --> 00:33:22,705 The point is 685 00:33:24,675 --> 00:33:26,409 you're all great people. 686 00:33:26,443 --> 00:33:27,743 You, 687 00:33:27,878 --> 00:33:29,478 you're a straight shooter. 688 00:33:29,513 --> 00:33:30,646 You go right from the hip. 689 00:33:30,681 --> 00:33:31,915 You, 690 00:33:31,949 --> 00:33:34,017 you're honest to goodness. 691 00:33:34,051 --> 00:33:36,519 You, you're tried and true. 692 00:33:36,553 --> 00:33:39,054 You, salt of the earth. 693 00:33:39,088 --> 00:33:39,788 You, 694 00:33:39,823 --> 00:33:42,157 drop dead gorgeous. 695 00:33:42,192 --> 00:33:45,027 What I'm saying here is people, 696 00:33:45,061 --> 00:33:47,830 I wouldn't try to distract you 697 00:33:47,864 --> 00:33:51,366 with a bunch of random facts and figures of speech 698 00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:54,002 cuz you'd smell a fraud from a mile away. 699 00:33:54,037 --> 00:33:57,571 And I have too much respect for you. 700 00:33:57,940 --> 00:33:59,340 People, people, people. 701 00:33:59,374 --> 00:34:02,276 There's nothing to fear but fear itself. 702 00:34:02,311 --> 00:34:04,645 And in summation, 703 00:34:04,679 --> 00:34:07,681 I'm thinking of the words of the great Clarence Thomas. 704 00:34:08,116 --> 00:34:10,051 If it don't fit, 705 00:34:10,552 --> 00:34:12,018 you must acquit. 706 00:34:13,955 --> 00:34:15,188 That's right. 707 00:34:23,030 --> 00:34:26,132 Those men are con artists and thieves! 708 00:34:27,201 --> 00:34:29,134 And he bit me! 709 00:34:35,775 --> 00:34:37,509 That was beautiful. 710 00:34:39,980 --> 00:34:41,713 But you're guilty, bro. 711 00:34:41,748 --> 00:34:43,148 Shit. 712 00:34:45,352 --> 00:34:48,186 I want to do you a favor though. 713 00:34:51,523 --> 00:34:54,058 Death by hanging. 714 00:35:10,241 --> 00:35:11,942 We've waited long enough! It's time to go! 715 00:35:11,976 --> 00:35:13,743 Just a minute! 716 00:35:24,021 --> 00:35:26,555 There's not a lot of people looking out for each other 717 00:35:26,589 --> 00:35:28,557 in this world anymore. 718 00:35:30,260 --> 00:35:32,395 But you always did. 719 00:35:33,563 --> 00:35:35,731 So if 10K's out there, 720 00:35:36,099 --> 00:35:37,832 he knows that. 721 00:35:40,102 --> 00:35:42,703 But we got to go right now. 722 00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,241 And it's not for Murphy. 723 00:35:47,009 --> 00:35:48,810 It's for me. 724 00:35:49,111 --> 00:35:50,678 I need you. 725 00:35:58,219 --> 00:36:00,887 Well, kid. What can I say? 726 00:36:01,156 --> 00:36:03,390 I couldn't get to you. 727 00:36:04,859 --> 00:36:08,195 The river's so full of Zs, I damn near drowned. 728 00:36:10,332 --> 00:36:13,333 But I hope you know I tried. 729 00:36:17,071 --> 00:36:19,339 You hang tough, buddy. 730 00:36:19,539 --> 00:36:21,341 I'm gonna miss you. 731 00:36:22,409 --> 00:36:24,677 Love you, kid. 732 00:36:27,414 --> 00:36:28,546 Sorry, Doc. 733 00:36:28,581 --> 00:36:31,516 But he knew what he was getting into. 734 00:36:53,702 --> 00:36:58,174 These man have been convicted of some pretty messed up crimes 735 00:36:58,199 --> 00:37:00,400 and even though I like a couple of them, 736 00:37:00,434 --> 00:37:04,204 the law is the law. 737 00:37:04,873 --> 00:37:09,677 Mr. Smithson, Mr. Geronimo, Mr. Renfield, 738 00:37:09,978 --> 00:37:12,112 you've been found guilty of grand larceny, 739 00:37:12,147 --> 00:37:14,081 identity theft, and just 740 00:37:14,115 --> 00:37:16,749 generally telling a whole bunch of lies. 741 00:37:16,850 --> 00:37:17,917 Mr. Burr, 742 00:37:18,585 --> 00:37:20,452 it's all yours. 743 00:37:20,821 --> 00:37:23,189 Dear, God. 744 00:37:23,223 --> 00:37:27,193 Please watch over these poor souls, 745 00:37:27,227 --> 00:37:31,030 whose deviant and wayward paths have led them 746 00:37:31,065 --> 00:37:33,765 to this unfortunate conclusion. 747 00:37:34,266 --> 00:37:37,402 We can only hope, oh Lord, 748 00:37:37,436 --> 00:37:40,471 that they don't cause as much trouble in hell 749 00:37:40,506 --> 00:37:43,441 as they have in this world. 750 00:37:43,475 --> 00:37:44,542 And God, 751 00:37:45,812 --> 00:37:48,180 please get the word out that if anybody steals any of my trucks, 752 00:37:48,214 --> 00:37:49,714 they're in for a long nap. 753 00:37:49,748 --> 00:37:51,148 Amen! 754 00:37:51,616 --> 00:37:53,084 Amen. 755 00:37:54,152 --> 00:37:56,420 Let's get this party started. 756 00:37:58,757 --> 00:37:59,724 You have any last words? 757 00:37:59,758 --> 00:38:02,593 Yes! Yes, I have last words. 758 00:38:03,028 --> 00:38:05,462 Ummm, I don't even know where to start. 759 00:38:05,496 --> 00:38:07,897 There's so many people to thank. 760 00:38:07,932 --> 00:38:09,733 I grew up in the high plains. 761 00:38:09,767 --> 00:38:12,035 My daddy was a rancher. 762 00:38:12,069 --> 00:38:14,070 We used to ride bulls, 763 00:38:14,105 --> 00:38:14,871 herd cattle, 764 00:38:16,140 --> 00:38:17,273 Sip beer, 765 00:38:17,307 --> 00:38:19,308 and breathe in that clean Nebraska air. 766 00:38:19,343 --> 00:38:22,445 I want to thank my mom and my dad and 767 00:38:22,479 --> 00:38:25,814 my old girlfriend Sally, who was the first one to let me put my 768 00:38:25,849 --> 00:38:27,449 Enough of that. 769 00:38:27,851 --> 00:38:28,851 Okay. 770 00:38:31,888 --> 00:38:33,822 It's hanging time. 771 00:38:42,064 --> 00:38:44,198 All right, pull! 772 00:39:44,456 --> 00:39:46,757 I told you you'd survive anything, you damn cockroach! 773 00:39:46,792 --> 00:39:47,792 I knew you'd come back for me. 774 00:39:47,826 --> 00:39:48,792 Damn straight. 775 00:39:48,827 --> 00:39:49,726 We should get out of here. 776 00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:51,228 Let's boogie. 777 00:40:18,188 --> 00:40:19,222 Hey, baby. 778 00:40:34,398 --> 00:40:35,064 Let's move! 779 00:40:49,211 --> 00:40:50,479 10K! Come on! 780 00:40:50,513 --> 00:40:51,880 We got to go! 781 00:40:51,914 --> 00:40:52,748 Let's go! 782 00:40:52,782 --> 00:40:53,914 Beat it, kid. 783 00:40:53,948 --> 00:40:55,949 We're not leaving here empty handed. 784 00:40:55,984 --> 00:40:57,117 Come on. Grab my hand. 785 00:40:57,152 --> 00:40:59,219 Go, man. We got this. I'm telling you. 786 00:40:59,254 --> 00:41:00,354 Seriously, we'll be fine. 787 00:41:00,389 --> 00:41:02,189 What are you talking about? You guys are goners. 788 00:41:02,223 --> 00:41:03,624 Are you kidding me?! 789 00:41:03,659 --> 00:41:05,826 Hey, don't you know by now, kid? 790 00:41:05,860 --> 00:41:08,228 We're the two luckiest bastards you ever met. 791 00:41:08,263 --> 00:41:09,697 They're getting close! 792 00:41:12,767 --> 00:41:13,733 Thank you. 793 00:41:13,768 --> 00:41:15,635 For what? We still haven't gotten you laid. 794 00:41:17,037 --> 00:41:18,605 For everything else, then. 795 00:41:50,969 --> 00:41:52,303 Probably shoulda ditched the weapons. 796 00:41:52,338 --> 00:41:53,671 Coulda, shoulda 797 00:41:53,972 --> 00:41:55,740 You know they got a name for that. 798 00:41:55,774 --> 00:41:57,575 Monday morning quarterback. 799 00:41:57,609 --> 00:41:58,876 Yeah, well if we can't be self-critical, 800 00:41:58,910 --> 00:42:00,378 there's no room for self-improvement. 801 00:42:00,412 --> 00:42:01,345 Who said that? 802 00:42:01,379 --> 00:42:02,045 I did. 803 00:42:02,079 --> 00:42:03,613 Oh. 804 00:42:06,417 --> 00:42:07,317 So I've been thinking 805 00:42:07,352 --> 00:42:08,151 Not again. 806 00:42:08,185 --> 00:42:09,886 Where to next. 807 00:42:09,987 --> 00:42:13,256 I'm thinking maybe Australia. They speak English there. 808 00:42:13,290 --> 00:42:15,058 True. But it's far though. 809 00:42:15,092 --> 00:42:17,828 Yeah. Yeah, it is. 810 00:42:20,163 --> 00:42:21,497 You ready? 811 00:42:22,232 --> 00:42:24,867 Sure. Why not? 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 55943

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