All language subtitles for Sally4Ever - 01x04 - Episode 4.WEBRip.x264-ION10

- Boop, boop, boop.
- Okay.

I saw a side of Emma
that I really don't like.

- Mm.
- Ow! Fuck! Did you just kick me?

What are you talking about?

- Cheers!
- You're an actress?

Yeah, acting's my...
my biggie right now.

- Mm.
- So, what are you working on?

- Um, a movie.
- We would love to be involved.

- Cool.
- So, you like Emma?

Yeah. She seems really...

- ... talented.
- Mm.

Molly, go back to bed.

You need to go to
sleep, okay, sweetheart?

Man, she's really hyper.

Yeah, I gave her some crack.

So what I wanna know is

what kind of stuff do
you and Sally get up to?

- If I got a part in your movie,
- ALAN: Mm.

- I could like tell you so much more detail.
- Ooh.

- Threesome alert.
- Yeah.

- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

- Hi, there.
- Hey.

Hi. Sorry.

You look nice. Yeah. Going to
do some poetry later, or... ?

Modern dance?

- I'm actually going to a funeral.
- Oh. Really sorry.

- It's just David's dad, so...
- Oh.

- I mean, not that... you know, I'm sorry...
- Yeah, yeah. Yes.

- Got to face them all, yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- And I heard the engagement's off.
- Yeah.

- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.

- It's probably for the best, really.
- Yeah, yeah.

- Anyway, how are you?
- Good. Really good.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Roquette's called it a day.
- Has she?

- Yeah.
- Sorry.

'Cause she doesn't
really like old people.

I'm sort of too close to death
really, to, uh, get involved with.

So, you know, she needs
someone more vibrant, I think.

- Mm.
- You know?

- Like her?
- Yeah. She needs a vibrant partner.

- Mm.
- Yeah.

So. Yeah, so a bit of a...

Sorry. It's a bit depressing, isn't it?

Maybe I should just come
along to your funeral with you.

- Yeah, well, you're very welcome.
- Yeah?

Yeah. It's gonna be fun, I think.

- Yeah.
- I better take this.

- Oh, it's Roquette.
- Maybe it's back on?

Huh. Hope not. Hello?

Yeah, no. No, you know the one.

It's got little almond flakes on it.

I think it's got chai berries in it,

and flax seeds and Swiss chard.

Actually, no, no. Don't
put Swiss chard in it.

Okay... Hey...

Oh. Oh, right.

- Hey.
- Hey. How are you?

- Good.
- Good to see you.

- You made it.
- Yeah.

- Wow. Cool.
- Just about.

And I made you some cookies.

Aw, that's very kind.
Thank you. Thank you.

- Yeah, I made them this morning.
- Wow. White chocolate.

- Yeah.
- My favorite. Thanks.

And, um, I was wondering, um,

if I could actually have
a chat with, um, Marion,

- talk about the part.
- Yeah, no, Marion's, um...

she's had to, sort of,
drop out of the movie.

- Yeah. Yeah. No one told you?
- What?

- No.
- Yeah, no, it's really unfortunate. She's...

She's just sort of really hung up about

being seen as a beautiful
actress the whole time.

- Oh, God, I get that.
- You know, she wanted to start, kind of, focusing

on more characterful roles.

And she started just getting
really fixated on the nose.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- She's got this kind of little button nose...
- Sure.

... le nez en bouton.

And she just wanted to sort of have

a more characterful nose.

- So she went to go and see a surgeon.
- Oh, my God.

- He gave her a bigger nose.
- Right.

- It looked fine...
- What kind of nose?

It was like a hooknose. It was like
she wanted, like, a Depardieu nose.

Right. His is more balloon.

His nose has gone balloon
because of the wine,

- but before, it was kind of a big...
- She's got a hooknose now.

She's got a hooknose, but now,

then she went back, and
she got a bigger nose,

and now it's like a crossbreed
of a kind of hook and a balloon.

I mean, I considered doing
a similar thing with my face

when I was worried I
wasn't getting enough roles,

because maybe my face would
be better if it was bigger.

Okay. What kind of face?

I don't know, like a moon face or...

Like a moon face. I mean,
there's not that many roles

for moon-faced ladies,
to be honest. Yeah.

So, maybe I should stick with this?

Stick with that. You're doing
wonders with that already.

- Really?
- Yeah.

So where does this leave us,
if Marion's not playing it,

and we've got this to work with?

Lena Headey has stepped in.

It was an old friend of mine,
and she's fucking saved the day.

Lena's going to be amazing.
She's just... she's the best.

- Why didn't you call me?
- Why?

I'm part French, you know that.

Yeah, it's a big name, it's a big movie.

You're going to be great. The
assistant baker's a really fun role.

What other parts are there in the movie?

The other part is Cranston's part.

Bryan Cranston. Who's he playing?

He's playing the butcher next door.

It's now kind of this love affair
between the butcher and the baker.

Come on. Can't I be a star, Dan?

I'm going to make you a star,
but I can't on this movie.

- Why?
- We're locked and loaded.

- Please?
- Come on.

I want to be a star.
Please make me a star.

Listen, I haven't forgotten
about your little promise to me.

- Which one?
- What do you mean, which one?

You, me, and Sal. Come on.

Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Busted.

- How are we doing, ladies?
- Morning. You all right?

- Yeah.
- Good, good, good.

- What's going on?
- Um, your daughter's coming in today?

Yeah. That's the plan, acting debut.

- It's gonna be fun. She's a sweetheart.
- Oh, sweet. Bless her.

Uh, I should check, actually.
Uh, our lady, uh, she's SA, yeah?

Emma, yeah, yeah. She's just background.

Rustic, ruddy, sort of, old
hag in the bakery kind of thing.

Right. Old hag. I'll let Stella know.

- All right. See you later.
- See you later.

There's a sort of art to it.
You know, you've got to...

move it up and down through the froth

until you get a nice, rich, creamy head.

Nice. She's proper
saucy today, isn't she?

What, Eleanor?

No. Sally.

I mean, not facially.
She's probably about a six,

if she had heavy makeup and a wig on.

Man, if this engagement's off,

you can't let those big, black
knockers go to waste, can you?

Big... What do you mean,
big, black knockers?

Well, I mean, she's wearing a black top.

They're probably white
underneath, but...

They might be black. I don't
know. I haven't seen 'em.

- Right.
- Yet.

Sorry.

Calm down, Nige.

Shot your load, already?

- Thank you.
- There you go, Emma. Stella's right at the end, there.

- The white coat?
- Yeah, the white coat. Yeah.

Hi. I'm Emma de Florentier.
I'm playing Carlotta.

Oh. I've got, um...

The assistant baker?

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm really
close with Dan, the director,

and we came up with
the name this morning

and backstory and
dialogue and stuff, so...

- It's Carlotta. Yeah.
- Okay.

I'm just wondering, um, I ordered, um...

poached egg, bacon baguette,
and an extra-hot cortado.

Yeah, okay, well, the
ADs will get that. Now...

We're looking at,
uh... rustic, aren't we?

Oh, no, no. Dan actually
said he wanted her quite glam,

um, sort of sultry and urgent-looking.

Now, I would love to do you,

because you've got fabulous cheekbones,

wonderful, wonderful eyes, all of that.

But unfortunately, on this
occasion, what we're looking for,

and Dan's been really
explicit about this,

he just wants the rustic, ruddy,

you know, old crone-y,
that kind of thing...

- Right.
- ... for the assistant baker.

Hmm. I don't think
that's what he said to me.

I think he thinks I'm really
sexy and kind of wants me

quite sort of sultry, like
I've just had a massive orgasm.

Yes. Absolutely. That's the ruddiness.

That's sort of flushed, isn't it?

Yeah, well, I mean, bakers do
have orgasms, I'm sure, but...

I think on this occasion, it's
something we don't need for the scene.

That's as far as I understand it.

Lovely. So it's a
sort of rustic-y thing.

- Well, more glam, really.
- Yeah. Glam-rustic. Yeah. Okay.

Hold that for me. That's
it, at the front. That's it.

Sorry, have those been worn?
'Cause that smells really fishy.

- Are they yours, or...
- No, my sweet, they're not tights.

No, no, no. This is a
special fresh wig cap.

Oh. Sorry, I could just
smell quite a strong, fishy...

You'd have to be very short,
wouldn't you, for that to fit.

- And one-legged.
- It's box-fresh.

I don't know, maybe one
of the facilities guys

has been using it as a cock sock.

I'm slightly worried if that
has been worn as a cock sock.

- That's it. That's lovely.
- It's quite low.

Bring it up, bring it up,
bring it up. That's it.

- Ooh, that's it.
- Okay.

Um, I just wonder where my cortado is.

Uh, you'll need to ask
Mark, the AD, about that.

Which one is Mark? Is he the
little brown guy with bad breath?

- This is Mark.
- Hi.

Ooh.

Okay to have a little chat?

- Sure. Yep.
- It's the whole Nigel thing.

What Nigel thing?

I know what you're trying to do.

- What do you mean?
- I can see you're trying to seduce him, and it's just...

it's really kind of unpleasant.

- Okay. Right.
- And I know Nigel finds it uncomfortable in meetings.

- All those, sort of, Lady Di looks.
- Lady Di?

The coy, big googly-eye thing,

and then you'll throw your head
back like you're a sort of...

- a baboon in heat.
- What?

You might as well shove your
big, red, fat bottom in his face.

I don't have a big, fat, red bottom.

Oh?

I know you fancy him, and you
want everyone to fancy you.

I mean... go figure.

Sorry, so you want me
to not look at Nigel.

I'm saying...

just because David's
called the engagement off

and your life isn't working,

don't try and steal
other people's happiness.

Right, and, uh... David
did not call it off.

- I called it off. Okay?
- Uh-huh.

And also, I've got a girlfriend.

So, thank you very much.

And go figure.

- Will that be blended?
- Yeah, it's gonna be blended.

- 'Cause that's quite...
- That's the starting position,

and then we work from there.

But you'd be amazed with
these new cameras, you know?

- Absolutely incredible.
- Really? They just pick up everything.

No. The opposite, complete
opposite. Everything disappears,

and you don't really
get any sharp lines.

It all becomes very, very soft.

I'm just a bit worried.

I just, I wonder if we could
have those big slug brows.

You know, the brows that
girls have at the moment.

- The Instagram kind of slug? Yeah.
- Mm.

Just to frame my eyes a bit. I'd
like them to pop a little bit.

Okay. Yeah, I can give you a
monobrow, no problem at all.

I don't want a monobrow. I
want, sort of, like, framing.

Well, what we're looking at here is,

a lovely receding eye
rather than a popping eye,

and more of a popping nose.

I don't know if want a popping nose.

Did Dan ask for a popping nose?

Yeah, Dan was talking about
a drinker's popping nose.

Right.

Sorry.

No womb, still I'm hot.

Um, I've gone through everything
for the phase two Krebel meeting.

All the artwork is backed up on here.

I'm really sorry. I've got to
go, but I'll be back in time...

Well, is it burial or cremation?

- I think it's cremation.
- Great. Soon as those curtains shut,

make your excuses and go.

- Okay?
- Okay.

- I think we're there.
- I just think maybe some mascara would help.

Um, Stella, just to
let you know, Lena's in.

- Mark?
- Yes?

Sorry, I was just wondering,

would I be able to talk to Lena first?

Um, I just wanted to show her

that when I'm with the baguette,

'cause I don't want to freak her out.

She might... handling the baguette
constantly through the scene,

it might frighten her.

She'll be able to take you fine.

Um, I'll tell her that
you're ready for her, yeah?

Yeah. I'm ready for her,

but if she prefers for
me to come to her...

Okay. No, she'll probably
come in, but I'll see.

- Whatever she wants, I'm happy.
- Mark? Mark?

Can you... ? Mark!

I just wondered if I could maybe
have a bit of lip gloss or something,

just to sort of show I've
just had a massive orgasm.

- Hi, Dan.
- Hey, Stella.

- Where's Emma? Have you seen her?
- Yes. She's...

I've been having a few problems
with her, to be honest with you.

- Oh, really?
- Yes.

I think Molly responded
really well to her.

- Who?
- Emma.

She's really good with
kids, very natural with them.

- Yeah.
- I guess 'cause she is one.

Hi. Hi, Mum.

I'm surprised you feel
able to show your face.

Hello, Kate. How are you?

How can you be like that?

Vicar Michael thinks that
Satan has taken a foothold.

Really? Well, luckily,
I don't believe in Satan.

Well, he believes in you.

I can smell him on your breath.

I think that might be me, actually.
I've just had some Doritos.

He is more than happy to rearrange
the exorcism if you're willing.

He's got the homosexuals
down to 30 minutes.

- Mum, please...
- I'm happy to pay for it.

I mean it, Sally. I'm
more than happy to pay.

- I'm just going to go and say hello to David.
- Yes, I think you should.

What do you think about Sally?

You think it'll pass?

My neighbor said that her sister
became one after a lengthy virus.

- A lesbian?
- Yes.

It's David I feel sorry for,

because he's never going to
meet anyone else now, is he?

- You don't think?
- No. No chance.

- And then losing his dad that way must be...
- Oh.

We were surprised he was successful.

- Successful?
- With the hanging.

'Cause he's huge. He was
with us on boxing day.

- Was he?
- Mm-hmm.

Ate us out of house and home.

- Oh. Bless him.
- He worked his way through all the cupboards.

Huge. Could hardly walk at the end.

Do you think he was a very sad man?

- No. I think he was just hungry.
- Right.

Apparently, they've had to
get him a special coffin, oval.

Oh.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

She's always been religious,
but she's gotten so extreme.

I just, I didn't know what to say.

Just one thing. Um...

you know when you and Emma
came 'round the other night.

Yeah.

I found all these sweet
wrappers under Molly's pillow.

- 'Cause I don't give her sweets.
- So, why are you telling me?

'Cause it's... I think Emma
might have given them to her.

You think Emma gave her sweets?

Well, I can't think of
any other explanation.

Look, I feel... I feel like
you don't want to like her.

No. It was just a really weird night.

I'm pretty sure Dan was
coked up when he came to bed.

I mean, he was trying
to wank in my face.

- What, are you going to tell me that's Emma's fault?
- No!

I'm sorry Kate, but you've
basically been really weird

with me ever since I met her.

I haven't. I'm just worried about you.

Why are you worried about me?

Can you not see how
massively happy I am?

I'm having the time of my life.

And I just feel like everyone
wants me to stay trapped with David.

No, I just don't want you
to throw everything away.

- Like having kids.
- I'm a fucking lesbian now, okay?

- I'm sorry.
- I just can't be here anymore. I'm going home.

- I'm sorry, Sal.
- Sal.

Sal.

Hi, Deborah. It's Sally.

I'm so sorry, I'm going to be a bit late

for the Krebel presentation. Okay, bye.

Ah, here you are. Hey, Emma.
Oh, looking a bit different.

- Hi.
- You all right?

- Yeah.
- You want to wander over to set?

I wasn't doing anything.

Okay, can we get a bit more
light on the flan, please?

Yeah. Just... glimmer it off.

God, that flan looks amazing.

Hey, Emma. How are you?

- Good.
- You're good?

I'm okay, I mean, I
didn't get any breakfast.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

- They should sort you out.
- I know. It's the little brown guy.

- Mark?
- Yeah. I don't know. Is he, like, a Muslim?

Mark's a pussycat.

I thought maybe he had
a chip on his shoulder,

like he's sort of an angry Muslim.

Anyway, 'cause it
brings on my tachycardia.

- Oh.
- It's a heart thing.

I've got, like, a growth on
my heart, like a second heart.

Really? And you're going to
be okay, though, for the take?

I should be fine if I can
get something decent to eat,

- just from someone.
- Yeah, we'll sort you out. You'll be fine.

- Not like a beast in the field.
- Right.

Do you know what I mean?

Listen, we need to, um,

get this done up at the
top. Have they done that yet?

God, no. You know the
ginger costume girl?

- Yeah.
- She just kept ripping it open and pressing my boobs.

- Laura?
- Is she gay?

- No, she's not gay. No.
- Really? She could not get enough of them.

- We'll get that sorted. Yeah, yeah.
- Thanks.

And, um... you've got
quite a lot of makeup on.

- Have I?
- Yeah. Let's get you rustic.

Let's just take the makeup off. Okay?

- Hey, Sal. How are you?
- Good.

- You good?
- Yeah.

- Good to see you.
- Hey. Why are you here?

Sorry. Um, could we have a word?

Well, I'm literally about
to start filming a scene.

- I've got to do my actor's stretches.
- Sorry. Just have a quick chat.

We've got a few issues with
lights, so we'll be a while.

So just help yourself
to coffee or anything.

Oh, yeah, could I get a cortado

and a chocolate-chip brioche?

Um, don't know what they are.

So sorry. Yeah.

Emma.

- Emma.
- Sorry.

- I just really need to focus.
- I saw Kate today.

It's a really weird thing, but, um...

do you remember giving
Molly sweets at all?

I'm sorry. I literally don't
understand the question.

Just, do you remember giving Molly
sweets? Did you give Molly sweets?

- Did I give Molly sweets? Um, I don't know.
- Yeah.

I don't keep a diary of
every minute of my day, so...

I know, it's just, Kate,
she was really upset.

What, so, suddenly,
there's sweet wrappers

under a kid's pillow
and I get the blame...

I didn't say they were under her pillow.

Oh, my God.

- It's so obvious what's going on here. Thank you.
- What? What?

Well, she's jealous. She's
jealous of you and me.

She knows she's really boring and ugly.

Her husband's not in love with her.

She's got an insane, sugar-addicted
child who doesn't love her

and actually asked if
I would be her mother.

- What?
- Yeah.

Em, I'm sorry, that's just... you know,

Kate would never do something
like that. And Dan loves her.

- Why are you saying things like that?
- I can't talk about her.

What do you... Has he said something?

Yeah, I just don't wanna...

I just don't wanna
shit-start. It's not my thing.

- What?
- I don't wanna say

on here with all these SAs listening.

- Tell me what he said!
- Me and Dan Barrow-Felfe have got really, really close.

And it's just, like,
he's the British Scorsese,

and I just want to work with him.

- Do my boobs look okay?
- Yes, they look fine.

Let's be honest. He vibed me out

ever since that day we
first met in the shop.

Don't you remember how he
was, like, just staring at me?

Yeah, I don't think
going upstairs with him

and talking so long really helped.

Oh, my God. I went upstairs

so that you guys could have
some quality time together.

Look, I didn't tell you when
I was there what happened.

It was horrible. He basically
shoved me into his office.

Showed me his desk, and it was
just, like, piled with coke.

It was horrible, and I just thought
you'd blame me if I told you.

Oh, my God. I'm sorry.

It was really frightening.

He put his hand around my neck,

and he was just, like,
slamming my head onto the table,

and, like, trying to shovel
all this coke up my nose

using his fingers and his thumbs.

There was one point he had
both his thumbs, up my nostrils.

- It was like being raped in the nose.
- God! That's Dan?

Yes. He's quite scary. I
know he's small and he's thin,

and he's really wiry and powerful,

especially in his boots.

Emma, Emma.

- We just need you on set. Thanks, love.
- Okay. Sorry.

I'm so sorry. Is Dan waiting?

- I'm sorry?
- Is Dan waiting for me?

Okay, we're gonna do a little
stumble through on set here,

so just a little bit of
quiet, guys. Thank you.

Okay. Sorry to interrupt the process.

Um, just wondered, um, at what
point you want me to walk by.

So, um, you know where it says,
"Assistant baker wipes the frame,"

just go when Lena says, "Wednesday."

Wednesday, okay. God, I'm so
sorry, I thought it was Thursday.

This is bugging me. We need to
get this done up to the top, okay?

Oh, God, I know. It's the
costume girl. She's not...

the ginger one, she's just not on it.

And I think, 'cause my boobs are so big,

they just keep really
forcing the top off.

And then the buttons
just fly everywhere,

and my nipples tend to shoot things off.

Okay, okay. So can we
get checks in, please?

- Checks, please.
- Can we get checks in, please? Thank you.

Thanks, Laura. Can
we just sort this out,

'cause the button keeps popping out.

- Yeah.
- I don't know if you're pulling off the buttons, or...

I mean, I'm not, though, so...

- I don't know.
- It's really strange.

- Well, something keeps happening 'cause...
- Something's going on.

- It's not popped off, though, has it, so...
- Yeah.

- What is it?
- I don't know,

but that's enough manhandling
of my boobs, thanks.

I, um...

- I think someone keeps undoing it.
- One way or another,

- it keeps popping out, and we can't have that.
- It does.

- Yeah, but it's very secure. It's really secure.
- Okay? Yeah.

- It's absolutely fine.
- Do you want to touch it, Dan?

That seems pretty good.

Um, she should be in a jacket.

- Okay, get her a jacket?
- Well, where's the jacket?

Can we get the jacket in, please, guys?

- Thank you.
- Sorry, guy, I...

- Can somebody walk the jacket in, please?
- I really need the jacket.

- Two minutes.
- I just do need the jacket.

Okay, is the jacket traveling?

Can I just check, is
the jacket traveling?

- It's traveling.
- Okay, the jacket's traveling.

- Sorry.
- Are you all right?

Are there any other loos I
could use, 'cause those are busy.

- Um, you know Dan, don't you?
- Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure he won't mind
you using his. It's just over there.

- Oh, great. Thank you.
- He's on set at the moment.

- Thanks.
- No worries.

Okay, um...

Oh, shit! Oh, my God.

I mean, actually, a
lot of the movies I do

come to me in dreams, you know?

- Wow.
- I'm just a fucking dream-catcher.

Yeah.

They come, I catch 'em, I
spin 'em into movies, you know.

Yeah. You can tell when you
watch your stuff it's sort of...

Yeah. It's gonna be fun. You
know, I paint with my cameras,

- and that's... that's what I do, and I...
- Yeah.

- For shits and giggles.
- Hey, guys.

- Hey, hey.
- Hi.

Uh, sorry.

- Emma is going to be your assistant baker.
- Carlotta.

- Okay.
- Built some character into it.

- And I've got the jacket. It arrived.
- Ah, Cool.

Okay. Let's go for a
take, guys. Come on.

Quiet, please!

Okay, and...

action!

Adieu, Monsieur Lièvre.
See you on Wednesday.

All my life I have been like
a butterfly trapped in a jar.

Okay, cut. Sorry, Lena, that
was... that was really great. Um...

What's... sorry. What's
going on with the baguette?

'Cause you're sort of...
rocking it up and down.

Oh, sorry. I was just doing
the traditional folk walk.

Okay, I've never heard of that.

It's something they do in the Pyrenees.

Okay. Don't make a big deal out of it,

'cause this is about Lena's character.

- Okay?
- Yeah. So just more casual, really.

- Yeah, just keep it casual.
- That's a great note, Dan. Thank you so much.

- So just hold it in a casual way.
- Yeah.

- Throw it away.
- 'Cause it's kind of distracting. Yeah, and it's...

- It doesn't look good. Okay? All right.
- Got it. I've got it.

But not like that 'cause that
just looks like a massive dick.

Yeah.

- Okay?
- Sorry, Dan.

- Right.
- Gosh.

- Okay guys, let's fuck.
- Thank you.

- Thanks, Lena.
- Thanks, Lena.

Okay. Sorry.

Okay. And...

- action!
- Au revoir, Monsieur Lièvre.

See you on Wednesday.

All my life, I have been like
a butterfly trapped in a jar.

Will anyone ever reach me?

To flee, to fly...

is my sweetest dream.

Okay. Cut. Sorry, Lena.

Um...

What are you...

I was just bringing the sadness,
like, echoing Lena's autism.

Okay, right. Yeah, sure. Yeah. This
is about Lena's character, okay?

She's gonna be doing that. She's
gonna be having the breakdown.

I just need you to pass the fuck by.

- Okay.
- Really easy.

It is quite easy. It's just a
walk. It's a really simple walk.

You just walk from that side
of the frame to that one, okay,

holding that baguette like you
would normally hold a baguette.

Do you know what, I
really feel the problem is

that I don't have any
lines. I'm a trained actress.

It's like being crippled.

No. No, I don't want to hear you.
I don't want to hear your character.

Listen, if this is too much for you,

we've got Big Margaret standing by.

She's really happy to do the part.

She's dressed, she's ready,

so we can just step her
in, if it's, if it's...

No, she's... she's really
quite a nasty piece of work.

Sorry, Lena.

Okay, let's do this.

And... action!

Adieu, Monsieur Lièvre.
See you on Wednesday.

All my life, I have been trapped
like a butterfly in a jar.

I wonder if anyone will ever reach me.

To float, to fly, is my sweetest dream.

Cut!

Cut! Okay, sorry.

I'm sorry, we really don't
have time for this, I'm afraid.

Okay. What's going on?

I mean, you're hobbling.
You look... you're hobbling.

What's going on?

Sorry, I was just trying
to boost the scene.

You're not boosting it.
You're ruining it. Okay?

Guys, this baguette
is not working for me.

What's going on with this baguette?

She insisted that she
have a plastic baguette

'cause she's allergic to
the powder that you get on...

I didn't ask for a plastic baguette...

You specifically, specifically
asked me for a plastic baguette,

'cause you said you were allergic
to the... I don't know, the powder.

I'm allergic to the powder.
My throat closes over,

I would have gone into
anaphylactic shock.

Now, I'm sorry, you've actually
been really rude to me all day.

Excuse me? Excuse me,
absolutely no, I haven't.

You pretended you didn't
know what a cortado was...

I don't know what a cortado is.

I mean, who doesn't
know what a cortado is?

- Do you know what it is?
- Yeah, I do know what a cortado is.

- Okay?
- I'd still love a cortado.

No, no, no, no, no. This is all
bullshit, okay? This is all bullshit.

Please, can we just
get Big Margaret on set?

- Do you want her on set now?
- Okay? Yeah. Yeah.

We just really need to
get this scene done, okay?

- I could work...
- We are way behind.

... with the baguette if
it had no powder on it.

I could work with a real baguette.

It's not the way I work, okay?

This is really, really
shitty, shitty behavior.

Okay? You really,
really fucked up, yeah?

Like a seriously big, fucked up
cunt with shit pouring out of it.

This is a simple, cunting scene, okay?

This should not be such
a fucking clusterfuck

of shitty, fat, stinking pricks! Okay?

Sorry, Dan. I think Lena's just...

made everyone really nervous.

No, Lena is a fucking dream!

Sorry, Dan. Could I play...

Like, Bryan Cranston's not in today.

He's got a really bad
hangover. Could I... ?

No. You're not fucking getting
Craston's fucking butcher!

Okay? Fuck! Jesus! Fuck!

- This is bullshit!
- I'm sorry, Dan!

Fuck!

- Dan!
- Bullshit!

Sorry!

It's bullshit!

Hello?

Hello?

I'm now going to hand over to Nigel,

who will do the presentation. Nigel.

I usually do the presentation with a...

my, uh, partner, my colleague Sally,

who's not here today 'cause
she's at a funeral, so...

- Maybe something cropped up at the funeral.
- Well, I don't know what.

Unless he came back alive.

- Need a hand?
- No. No.

Ah. Okay. Phew. Okay. Here we go.

Now, looking towards
future opportunities...

- Shit! What the... ?
- Whoopsie! Mr. Clumsy.

- So sorry.
- Not to worry, Susanna.

Got some hard copies printed.

- Oh!
- Deborah.

- Thank you, Eleanor.
- Nigel.

- What did you do that for?
- What?

Please don't ever call
'round my house again, okay?

My wife is very, very upset.

Well, she'd be more upset if
she knew about the threesome.

What fucking threesome? Okay? I've
been waiting in good faith on that,

because I didn't think you
were such a shit actress.

But you seem really, really stressed.

Yeah? Why don't we just, like,
do a line, and I could blow you.

- Oh, God, no.
- Come on.

- What? What, now?
- Yeah.

Come on, seriously,
like a really deep blow.

Oh, Jesus. Oh, God. How deep?

Like right down my throat,
you can touch my stomach.

- Oh, God. You got... you gotta swallow.
- Of course.

- Okay. Can I shit on you?
- Oh, yes, please.

So I'm gonna come all down
your throat, until you gag.

Okay? Then I'm gonna shit in your mouth,

- and I'm gonna piss in your eyes.
- Okay.

- Okay?
- Everything okay, sir?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just
give us five minutes.

- That's five, guys.
- I want you to talk dirty to me, like abusive shit.

Yeah.

How abusive?

Like, fucking dirty shit.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, I'm getting my cock out.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah, my cock is out.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm pumping,
I'm pumping my stinking, fat dick.

- I hate your prick.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, he is disgusting.

Oh, yeah! Oh! Yeah, yeah, slap it.

Slap it. I want you to slap it.

Slap it hard, Punch it, punch it!

Oh, yeah!

I'm gonna bite your prick
off. I'm gonna bite it off.

Bite it off, bite it off, bite it off!

Bite off the end, bite off
the end, bite off the end!

- It's your first little part, isn't it?
- Really?

In one of Daddy's films.

Aw, how fantastic is
that? It's just over here.

- Come on. Oh!
- Oh, my God!

- It's coming!
- You're gonna come!

- Get down, get down.
- Okay.

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, it's coming. Oh, it's coming.

Oh, fuck! Oh, my God!

Oh, yeah, yeah! It's coming! Yeah!

Jesus, fuck!

Oh! Oh! Oh! I'm gonna come and shit!

Oh, yeah!

- Oh, it's coming, oh!
- Oh, my God!

Oh, Sal! Oh! Oh! Wow, this is
happening. Oh. Oh, get involved.

I feel sick. I feel really sick.

- Take a shit.
- Oh, I'm gonna squirt, Sal.

Oh, it's a big one. It's a big one. Oh!

- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!

- Oh, coax it out, Sal.
- I don't want to... What? No!

- Hey, your anus! It's flaring!
- It's a big one.

Coax it out!

It's a big one!

Dada done poo-poo.

Oh! Fuck!

Is there more?

It's been a while since I've
had a real penis in my mouth.

- Aww.
- Is that weird, to say that?

No. No, it's fine.

I feel very, very unhappy with Emma.

I think I have to end
it. I want to have a baby.

I'm a baby maker, honey.

I'm wondering whether a hysterectomy

might not sort you out.

Or I could whip out the ovaries

and leave the old wombat where it is.

Unless you start making decisions,

sunny, sunny, sunny,

then you're gonna end
up a lonely old maid,

and I say that with the greatest
love and the greatest respect.

Mm... yeah.

- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -