All language subtitles for Eureka S3 E10

Come on, Allison, no
standardized test can tell me

whether I'm fit to do my job.

Biannual recertification exams are required
by the dod. To keep your job, Carter.

Make sure you're not
slowing down in your old age.

Well, I'm in the best shape
of my life. I'm like a viking.

These aren't your standard
fitness tests, Carter.

Well, how hard can they be?

Well, the exams are unique
to each individual.

For the next 48 hours, they
will try to push you to your limit,

physically, psychologically
and emotionally.

But don't worry.

We haven't had a death or
psychotic break in, like, forever.

That's reassuring.

Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that.
I'll check on what's left of you later.

Seriously?

Hey! Holy cow, Jo, you okay?

Are you kidding?
That was awesome.

Is this the next victim?

Oh, sheriff Carter, this is Dr. Bella
pagani. She'll be running your exam.

Hi. It's a pleasure.

Trust me, it won't be for long.

Hi, Fargo.

Hey, Julia.

So, how did my deputy do?

She's perfect.

No surprise there.

Stop it. I'm blushing.

No one expects you to match
deputy Lupo's performance, sheriff.

Well, that's a relief.

Take these, and try
to get some rest.

The test can sometimes
have side effects.

This is your panic button.

Wow.

Couldn't make it any bigger?

Use it anytime to stop the test.

Of course, that would
mean admitting defeat,

and unemployment.

Let's get you changed.

Sure. Sure, sure.

Oh, about watching Zoe, just
make sure she does her homework,

and spend some quality time with
Sarah. She tends to get lonely.

And try not to let the town
burn down while I'm gone.

Carter, I'm perfect, remember?
I can handle my job and yours.

Mmm-hmm.

Have fun!

All right.

Oh, Allison,
you wanted to see me?

Yes, we are going to
beta-test a new security system

I wanted you to be aware of,
biometric DNA monitoring.

Well, that sounds ominous.

No, it's a way to keep
track of employees.

G.d. Already has security
badges, retinal scans.

It's a much more secure
system. It's the next logical step.

To what, 1984?

To keeping people safe.

This monitoring system also
has real—world applications.

Natural disasters, industrial
accidents, kidnapping.

Invasion of privacy.

Dr. Jacob Stefano has been
developing this for three years.

The d.O.D. Wants results,
or they're gonna cut funding.

Ah, well, if you've already
decided, why ask me?

Because it's not limited to
global. It covers the entire town.

As mayor, you get a vote,
along with me as head of global

and local law enforcement.

Meaning Jack?

Normally, yes, but since he's
tied up in testing, Jo gets the vote.

Convenient timing.

Not everything is convenient.

Mmm.

Careful, my girlfriend
might see you.

Hey, Jo. Awkward.

I will show you awkward!

You okay, Fargo?

Yeah, just thinking...

About making out with Jo?

What? No! I'm way
over that, completely.

Well, there's someone out there
for everyone. You'll find yours.

Keep telling me that.

So? How'd you do?

Apparently, I'm perfect.

Oh. You were serious.

Remember that kiss,
it was your last.

Come on. I think you're
great, but no one's perfect.

She's darn close.

Why, thank you, Fargo.

Please. He's just trying
to get on your good side.

Well, maybe, you should
try to get on my good side.

Look, I'm just saying,
we all have our flaws,

like being hypersensitive
and overreactive.

And all I'm saying is that when
you really care about somebody,

you don't focus on their flaws.

So maybe that gives me
something to think about.

Lupo.

Oh, hey, Allison.

Yeah, I'll be right there.

You, I'm done with. But it
was nice to see you, Douglas.

"Douglas"?

Allison: So, Dr. Stefano,
your pilot program is ready to go?

Absolutely.

Once I've uploaded everyone's
DNA profile into the system,

it'll monitor their
vital signs andlocafion

in case an emergency
security situation arises.

Well, that could definitely come
in handy, especially in this town.

Sure, if you're willing to compromise
civil liberties in the name of security.

And a lot of people are.

Then, let them volunteer their
DNA. Don't make it mandatory.

I vote no.

Jo, you're acting sheriff.
Your vote decides.

I have to put
town security first.

I vote yes.

Then you can be the first
of our tribunal to go.

Just stand in the chamber.
Just stand right in the center.

It'll scan your DNA
in less than a minute.

You won't feel a thing.

Shut it down!

Allison: Jo! Jo!

I think she's coming around. Jo?

How do you feel?

Oh, like a freaking light bulb.

Here, let me help you.

Take it easy.

I'm good.

I've done hundreds of scans.

I have no idea what went wrong.

Could that have
something to do with it?

The genome spectrometer
is missing.

No wonder the settings
went off the charts.

Why would someone take that?

I don't know.

But I've got a replacement,

so we can get the
system back online.

After what just happened?

What happened was sabotage.

I put three years into this
project. I'm not giving up now.

Who would do this?

I'm pulling Carter
from his exams.

I'm acting sheriff.
I can handle it.

Jo, you just had quite a
jolt. You need time to recover.

I'll be fine, as soon as I regain
sensation in my extremities.

Allison, just get the
DNA monitor back online.

We may be needing it.

Are you sure you're up to this?

Hey, don't worry about my
performance. Worry about Carter's.

Hello?

Like what you've done
with the place.

I hear white's the new

black.

So, is there gonna be
a test anytime soon?

Computer voice: Push the button.

That's it? That's the big test?

Well, no wonder
Lupo scored so...

High.

Very high.

Push the button.

Oh, crap.

Hey, Henry.

Jo! How you feeling?

Little fuzzy,
but crime waits for no one.

Hey, I need to figure out who'd
want to steal that genomi...

Genomi—thermometer

thingy.

Just a few hours as sheriff, and
you're already sounding like Carter.

Yeah, a near-electrocution
can do that to you.

I checked for prints.
I got nothing.

Any idea what they'd
want to use it for?

Well, there's lots of potential
research applications.

But I'm wondering
if it has anything to do

with a missing
intramuscular electrode array.

Okay. Any particular reason?

Because mine appears to be gone.

So, that makes two thefts.

Could you try and figure out a
link between the two devices?

I can try.

Great, and I'll work on a list of people
that have access to Stefano's lab.

Right after I help Zoe
with her homework.

A parent's work is never done.

So, if you differentiate the cross-product
of r and p with respect to time,

that should equal zero, right?

Can't Sarah help you?

Sarah: I'm sorry.
I'm not programmed to cheat.

Whatever. It's good enough.

Oh!

What do you say we go to
Vincent's for karaoke night?

I'd say I have a very
important case to solve,

it's a school night, and
your dad would kill me.

My dad's not here.

But I am, so for the next
48 hours, consider me him.

Come on, Jo. Aunt Lexi
would totally take me,

if she wasn't off at her
chakra retreat thing.

Look, I'm exhausted.
I have a pounding headache,

and all I want to do
is take a nap.

Wow, and I thought
my dad was no fun.

Hey, I'm tons of fun.

Whatever. Just go
solve your big case.

I'll be in my room solving this.

Computer voice: Push the button.

You can't do this! I mean,
nobody can do this! It isn't possible!

It's...

That's the answer.
Isn't it? Right?

You can't make
the floor disappear.

It's a hologram. Nice.

Ah!

Lupo put you up to this,
didn't she?

Push the button.

Vincent: Come on.
It's my first karaoke night.

I need everything to be perfect.

Hey, Jo.

Fargo, hi.

Hey, Jo. What are you up to?

Oh, you know, protecting
and serving, the usual.

So, what are you working on?

A new a! Program. The first law
of robotics is giving me trouble.

"A robot may not injure
a human being

"or, through inaction, allow a
human being to come into harm."

You know Asimov's three laws?

Are you kidding? Isaac
Asimov is my personal god.

I had no idea!

Give me some sci—fi and
halo 3 and I am a happy girl.

Wow!

So, what's going on in here?

Oh, virtual karaoke night.
You should stick around.

Maybe I will.

Where have you been? Henry
said there's been another theft.

Yes! I, uh... it must have
slipped my mind for a second.

Jo, we've had two very highly
valuable pieces of equipment stolen.

If you're not feeling
up to this...

No, I'm good.

You sure? Because we need
to find out who's responsible.

Absolutely. It's already
been taken care of.

Okay, who is it?

Him.

What? Too pitchy?

I swear, I am innocent!

Hey, we're trying to talk here!

You got to show them who's boss.

Hey, are you sure
that Larry did this?

Well, he had motive, knowledge,
and opportunity, it's a trifecta.

But what exactly was his motive?

Well, isn't it obvious?

To steal.

Ooh!

Yeah, but why?

Criminal mind's an enigma.
Is this thing cool, or what?

Hey, Jo? I'm a little concerned

that the shock to your system
is affecting your judgment.

Shock?

At Dr. Stefano's? Remember?

Yeah, I took a nap, and I woke
up feeling like a brand new woman.

But now I feel like
celebrating my first bust.

Hey, Jo, you've had
dozens of busts.

Well, I mean as acting sheriff.

Don't worry about him.
He won't be any more trouble.

Jo's on the job.

He's not the one
I'm worried about.

Okay! So, not a hologram.

So, not a hologram. All right.

Computer voice: You can use the
panic button at any time to end the test.

Give Jo the satisfaction?

I don't think so.

Thanks, but I'm not really
much of a card player.

Whatever will help
achieve your goal.

My god.

Don't you forget about me

Okay. Before you kill me,
I am really sorry.

For what? You were amazing.

What?

So... so you're not gonna
shoot me or, worse, tell my dad?

Not unless you want me to
tell him that you were awesome.

Wow! Okay.

Vincent: Hey, Jo, your usual?

Heck, make it a double.

Whatever you say.

I'm off—duty.

Are you gonna sing a song?

Me, up there, alone?

Well, you two could do a duet.

We could pick songs and costumes.
It's gonna be awesome. Come.

Uh, wait, I...

Oh, boy.

Enjoy!

Okay, that's not Espresso.

No, that's ouzo.

It's my usual?

Jo, come on. Hurry up.

Hit me.

Another bride

another June

another sunny

honeymoon

another season

another reason

for making whoopee

she sits alone

'most every night

He doesn't phone her

he doesn't write

he says he's busy

but she says, "is he

"making whoopee?"

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Hey! Did you see me?

Everybody saw you.

Yeah.

What the hell was that?

The most fun
I think I've ever had.

God, I can't believe this.
Do I know you?

Maybe you don't.

Okay. Um, but let's get
your clothes. We're leaving.

No. I'm leaving.

Bye, Fargo.

Zoe: Hey, rock star,
rise and shine.

Oh, god, does that say 8:00 am?

Yep. Just on my way to school.

How you feeling?

I think my headache's
actually worse.

I'm not surprised after
last night's performance.

What performance?

Wow. You must have been
drunker than I thought.

Café diem? Karaoke?

You went, even after
I told you not to?

Well, yeah, because
you said it was cool.

Sarah: Actually, she forbade it.

No one's asking you, Sarah!

And I've been completely out
since before 8:00.

Yeah, out dancing on
pianos and kissing Fargo,

after which you passed out here.

What are you talking about?

Sarah: Dr. Fargo is at the door.

That.

Fargo! What are you doing here?

Hey. Um,

can I talk to Jo
for a sec? Alone?

Actually, I'm starting
to think I want a witness.

Sarah: I'm happy to oblige.

No, thanks, Sarah, we're good.

Uh, okay. Um...

I'll just come
right out and say it.

Jo, your kiss moved my soul,
and I don't care who knows.

Very, very funny, but I
don't have time for this.

Um, no, this is not a joke.
You can ask anyone at the cafe.

Okay, I've been through my fair share
of physical traumas in the last 24 hours,

and kissing Fargo
wasn't one of them.

Ouch.

Sorry, but I got
to get back to work

before Allison decides that
I'm completely incompetent.

And you, I'll deal with later.

I'll take them if you want.

Thank you.

I'll push the button.

Okay. Now what?

Stage two. Push the button.

You got to be kidding me!

You have all the tools you
need to complete the test.

Bunch of psychos.

Larry, what are you
doing in there?

You put me in here!

Okay, has everyone gone nuts?

That's what I'd like to know.

"Hill?

That... that's all
you have to say?

Uh, what do you
expect me to say?

"Sorry for getting wasted
and making out with Fargo."

Ooh! You made out with Fargo?

No. Okay... kind of...

You've been talking
to Zoe, haven't you?

I saw you last night. Brilliant.

Okay, let's punk the deputy
on her first case as sheriff. Yes?

You know what?

I can't talk to you right
now. Good luck, Larry.

Okay. I appreciate the effort,

but Larry,

get the hell out of my cell.

Gladly.

Wow.

Lupo.

It's Allison. We have a problem.

I need you to come
to g.D. Right now.

I'm on my way.

Hypermethylation plasma was
taken from the infirmary last night.

Which is?

A serum used
in tumor treatments.

So, I'll start talking to people,
see if anybody saw anything.

We already know who took it.

Great! So, your DNA
monitor is working?

Yeah, I got the system
fully online last night.

Shows this DNA signature in
the infirmary at the time of the theft.

It's a perfect match.

Well, this...
This can't be right.

The person behind the thefts,

the person that
we've been looking for,

is you.

But nothing is going on
with me. I didn't do anything.

Jo, you suffered a serious
injury. You need to be tested.

Henry: Given the shock
to your system,

memory loss and aberrant
behavior are not surprising.

But I remember everything,
and I'm not aberrant.

Okay, so what you did last
night at cafe diem was normal?

I didn't do that.

I took a nap after helping Zoe with her
homework, because I had a headache.

When I woke up, it was morning.

You also arrested Larry last
night. Henry and I were there.

Dr. Pagani did say that there
could be some side effects

after the recertification exam,

but why would I want to
steal all that equipment?

Honey, you kissed Fargo.

You're acting a tad impulsively.

Jo, we want to help.

Then figure out what all that
stolen equipment has in common,

and I will figure out
what's going on.

Oh, no,
you need time to recover.

Carter will be done with this
test in 12 hours. He can take over.

You know what? Why don't we
just let her work until he's done?

And then you can do all
the testing that you want.

Please, Allison, I am not crazy.

Okay. Fine. Twelve hours.

Thank you.

Come on.

Come on!

Carter: Holy smokes.

Deputy Lupo!

Are you here to make sure
your perfect record's intact?

No, not so much. I
want to talk to Carter.

I'm sorry, you know the rules.

No outside contact,
until testing's complete.

Did you want to try back...

Oh, no!

Tomorrow?

Carter: This sucks!

I've got to go back
to the beginning.

Back to the beginning.

Thanks.

Dr. Stefano, I know you've
been under a lot of pressure

to beta-test your
DNA monitoring system.

Well, there's always a deadline.

That's the nature
of government research.

Well, is it possible that the
security was compromised

when the spectrometer was taken?

Absolutely not. I
replaced the stolen part,

and the system's been
working perfectly ever since.

Well, then, how come it
showed me in the infirmary

when I was sleeping
comfortably in a bed?

How come I heard you
were out frenching Fargo?

That wasn't me.

The sheriff's smart house, Sarah,
confirmed that Jo was there all night.

She must be mistaken.

Then show me the DNA signature of the person
in the infirmary at the time of the theft.

And the person in
the smart house. Now.

You've
been lying this entire time.

Does this thing even work?

Yes. It was the one
anomaly I couldn't explain.

I didn't want to postpone
the beta-test again.

What anomaly?

There were two
DNA signatures for you.

When the system showed two matching
DNA strands, I thought it was a glitch.

And Jo hasn't exactly been
herself recently. Have you?

Jo! Hey! Jo!

Hey! Jo!

Hey. Fargo, hey, thanks
for last night. It was, uh,

memorable.

Really? Because this morning
you denied iteverhappened.

Sorry. You know what? I
took a sleeping pill last night,

and I was a bit out of
sorts, but I'm better now.

Oh. Okay, so can we talk?

How about tonight at the
target range? About 6:00?

You mean, like a date?

I got to run.

Uh—oh. Fargo!

Okay, you want to
dance? Let's dance.

Just so you know,
in high school,

I took a semester of shotokan.

Fargo, I don't want to
fight. I'm worried about Jo.

One second, she's acting normal,

and then the next,
she's kissing you.

Yeah, well, maybe she's
finally come to her senses.

You just talked to her. Didn't
she seem different to you?

Well, she kind of
just asked me out.

And that didn't
strike you as odd?

It just really
felt like we were connecfing. L"

call me crazy, but I don't
think she was faking it.

Yeah, well,
that's what worries me.

Henry: You are right. I've been
considering the possible applications

for the three devices
that have been taken.

Genome spectrometer, intramuscular
electrode array, methylation plasma.

And?

All three have applications to
experiments dealing with DNA manipulation.

So, we're looking for someone
who has access to my DNA.

Yes, but who would
want your DNA?

Someone who thinks I'm perfect.

This shouldn't be happening.

Oh, this is really bad.

Oh, it's about to get worse.

Julia?

Please, don't be mad.

You stole my face!
Is this what you used?

I'm really sorry, Jo.

I just wanted to see what it would
feel like to be you for just a day.

I mean, you're beautiful,

and confident,
and everyone respects you.

Okay, I...

I wouldn't say
I'm beautiful, but...

Please. Even the one guy
I like only has eyes for you.

Look, I'm flattered, but
the party's over. Undo it.

I can't.

The DNA base strands are
destabilizing. I can't reverse it.

Well, you're not gonna
stop trying until you do,

even if it's from myjail cell.

Please.

Jo, I know I messed up, but I
never meant to cause any trouble.

I just wanted to feel less

ordinary.

Look, I'm sorry,
but you're coming with me.

What's happening?

Remote, time-released sedatives.

I gave them to you
after the test.

I needed to make sure that there
weren't two of us walking around.

Julia, don't do this.

I am so sorry, Jo. I just...

If I have to choose
between your life or mine,

I choose yours.

Allison: She's back.

Can you talk?

Julia, she's behind the
entire thing. Did you catch her?

Actually, yeah, I did.

What the hell did you do to me?

You mean, what did you do to me?

Allison: Jo told us how
you stole the equipment,

and how you used her DNA
from the exams to steal her identity.

No! I figured out
how she stole my identity,

and now she's
turned me into her.

That's what Jo said
you would say.

She tried to convince me
I was going crazy,

because of post-traumatic
stress syndrome.

You actually had me
doubting my own sanity.

You did that to me.

Allison, Henry,
you have to believe me.

I am Jo.

Sheriff Cobb hired me
five years ago.

I graduated top of my
class at west point.

I can kill a man with my thumbs!

All of which is information she
could access from my personnel file.

Julia... don't call me that!

When I get out of here,
I'm gonna kick your ass...

We're gonna keep you
under observation

until we do a full psych workup.

The ethics committee will take
your mental state under consideration,

while they decide on
your redaction from Eureka.

No, you can't redact me!
That is exactly what she wants!

I am really sorry.

You can't do this to...

Carter: I can't do this!

That's the answer. Isn't it?

It can't be done.

All the tools I need...

Yeah!

What else you got, huh?

Whoa! Cold water!

Is that crazy or what?

Crazy! That's
definitely the word.

What's wrong? You want a turn?

It's just...

You've kind of been
giving me mixed signals.

Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

I've been going through some
pretty major changes lately.

You know, what I want
out of life, who I want to be,

who I want to be with.

So, what do you want?

Let me give you a reminder.

I don't think so.

I thought you liked me.

I do.

It's just... I'm not convinced
I know who you are.

But I'd like to.

I'm not sure that you're
gonna want to for long.

Zane, thank god you're here.

Julia, right? Allison told
me what you did to Jo.

She's Julia golden,

and I'm Jo.

Ah. Psych ward. I'm Henry.

I can prove it. Ask me something
personal that only Jo could know.

Pet peeves?

Small guns, big egos,

and overly critical boyfriends.

Boxers or briefs?

Me or you?

Funny. Me. Boxers.

Except on laundry day,

which, by my account,
would be tomorrow.

First date?

Sunday brunch at cafe diem.

I was nervous.

You brought a Rose.

I wore a sundress.

You said something smart
which made me feel dumb.

But you made up for it
on our second date.

So, does that mean I sounded
dumb or made you feel smart?

A little bit of both.

And how'd the date end?

Let me give you a reminder.

That's my Josefina.

Then get me out of here, before I
tase you for kissing another woman.

Yep, definitely Jo.

Zane, what's happening to me?

I've never seen anything
like this. Her DNA markers

don't match her original profile.
They don't match any profile.

I'm so sorry, Jo. I still can't
believe that's you in there.

Yeah, trust me, it's her.

Just fix me and all's forgiven.

Henry: We're working on it.

Transfiguration process must
have caused her DNA to decompose.

It's like her cells
are misfiring.

So, if we can't restart
them again, then...

Being stuck in Julia's body
is the least of her problems.

If her cells stop functioning,

we could lose her for good.

These will stabilize the
spasms, but not for long.

How can my cells be misfiring?

Bodies regulate tiny electrical
impulses that allow cells to function.

Yours aren't getting
enough juice.

Your DNA strands are
essentially unraveling.

The genetic lines between Jo
and Julia are becoming blurred.

I've been blurry ever since I was
shocked by your stupid scanner.

Again, really sorry about that.

What if we do it again?

One
near-electrocution wasn't enough?

Well, my cells are misfiring.

What if we give them
a genetic jump start?

The scanner does have
your original DNA profile.

Yeah, programming them into
Julia's device might restart the markers.

It's like a cellular reboot.

We need Julia to show us how.

Well, we're trying to
pinpoint her location now.

Jo: If this is happening to me,
it must be happening to her, too.

Can we use the DNA monitor to
track her down the way she tracked me?

Not if her DNA is degenerating.

It won't match
the profile in the system.

Then try searching for Fargo's.

So, you're Julia?

How long have you known?

I guess I always knew
something was off.

I'm really sorry
llied. I just...

I wanted you to notice me.

What are you talking about?
You had me at halo.

Because I looked like Jo.

Look, I've tried before,
and you've never responded.

Yeah, because I'm clueless
and completely socially awkward.

Yeah, but I'm sure
looking like this didn't hurt.

Maybe not, but it's you
I connected with,

and I'd really like
to connect more.

I have really made
an awful mess of things.

Please!

I have made my fair share
of messes. Believe me.

I'm not sure this one
can be fixed.

Well, with your help,
we think it can.

And you rerouted the plasma
impulse through the electrode array?

Exactly how you said.

But, you're both critical, and we
can only treat one of you at a time.

Okay. Jo goes first.

You're in the worse shape,
Julia. You may not survive the wait.

Jo first.

Okay, that's it. I've programmed
her original DNA profile

into Julia's
transfiguration device.

All right. She's stabilized for the
moment. We need to do this now!

All right, let's go.

Blood pressure is dropping.
Her system's too unstable.

If we stop the scan now, we
may not get another chance.

Well, she's getting worse!

Come on, Jo. Don't
give up on me now.

She's still not responding.

We have to stop this.
No. Just hang on!

Is she...

Blood pressure's rising.

Her DNA profile
is starting to stabilize.

Yes!

Hey.

You had me worried there.

How do I look?

Perfect.

You've just done
a very brave thing.

No. Brave would have been staying
inside my own skin to begin with.

Fargo: It's time
to get you back.

Thanks.

It's okay.

Allison: So, Julia, I have
spoken with the ethics committee.

They're gonna
schedule a hearing.

Of course.

I'm so sorry about all of
the trouble that I've caused

with deputy Lupo and Larry.

I feel awful.

In any case, given the fact that
you helped save deputy Lupo,

and the incredible advances
you made in DNA transfiguration,

you can stay in Eureka...

Ah!

On probation,

pending formal review.

That's great.

Thank you so much, Dr. Blake.

There are a few things that I
would really like to stick around for.

Fargo.

Well, all's well that ends well.

Speaking of which,

I have sent the DNA monitor
back into redevelopment.

You were right. It wasn't ready.

It wasn't about being right.

I know, and I still believe that it has
the potential to protect a lot of people.

In a perfect world.

Well, in a perfect world,
we wouldn't need it. Mmm.

Whoo! Whoo!

How'd you do?

What? How'd you do?

Uh... yeah.
I think your record's safe.

But, he passed with high marks.

Never doubted he would.

So, same time
next year, sheriff.

What? Uh, Allison said it
was gonna be every two years.

Oh, no. You didn't
score that high, so...

What? What?

It's just...

It's good to have you back.

Oh!

I should go away more often.

I'd prefer you didn't. Being
you is no walk in the park.

Meaning?

Nothing I couldn't handle alone.

It's just more fun
having you around.

Yeah, tell me about it. Those
48 hours alone were way too long.

Could have been worse. There
could have been two of you.

Sorry, what? Nothing.

Uh, Vinspresso? Yeah!

Yeah, make mine a double.

Okay.

Did you have to tread water?

What?