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Kids, I'm gonna tell you an incredible story ;
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the story of how I met your mother.
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Are we being punished for something ?
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No.
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Yeah, is this gonna take a while ?
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Yes. 25 years ago, before I was Dad,
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I had this whole other life.
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It was way back in 2005.
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I was 27, just starting to make it as an architect
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and living in New York with Marshall, my best friend from college.
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My life was good.
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And then Uncle Marshall went and screwed the whole thing up.
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Will you marry me ?
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Yes. Perfect !
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And then you're engaged.
You pop the champagne.
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You drink a toast.
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You have sex on the kitchen floor.
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Don't have sex on our kitchen floor.
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Got it.
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Thanks for helping me plan this out, Ted.
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Dude, are you kidding ?
It's you and Lilly.
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I've been there for all the big moments of you and Lilly :
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night you met, your first date, other first things.
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Yeah, sorry.
We thought you were asleep.
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It's physics, Marshall.
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If the bottom bunk moves, the top bunk moves, too.
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My God.
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You're getting engaged tonight.
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Yeah. What are you doin' tonight ?
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What was I doing ?
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Here Uncle Marshall was taking the biggest step of his life.
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And me ?
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I'm calling up your Uncle Barney.
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Hey, so you know how I've always had a thing for half-Asian girls ?
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Well, now I've got a new favorite... Lebanese girls.
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Lebanese girls are the new half-Asians.
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Hey, you want to do somethin' tonight ?
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Okay, meet me at the bar in 15 minutes. And suit up !
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Where's your suit ?
40
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Just once, when I say suit up, I wish you'd put on a suit.
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I did that one time.
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It was a blazer !
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You know, ever since college it's been, Marshall and Lilly and me.
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Now, it's gonna be Marshall and Lilly... and me.
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They'll get married, start a family.
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Before long, I'm that weird, middle-aged bachelor their kids call Uncle Ted.
47
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I see what this is about.
48
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Have you forgotten what I said to you the night we met ?
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Ted, I'm gonna teach you how to live.
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Barney. We met at the urinal.
51
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Oh, right. Right.
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Lesson one : lose the goatee.
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It doesn't go with your suit.
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- I'm not wearing a suit.
- Lesson two : get a suit.
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Suits are cool.
Exhibit "A."
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Lesson three : don't even think about getting married till you're 30.
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30. Right. You're right.
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I guess it's just, your best friend gets engaged,
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you start thinking about that stuff.
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I thought I was your best friend.
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Ted, say I'm your best friend.
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You're my best friend, Barney.
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Good. Then, as your best friend,
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I suggest we play a little game I like to call
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- "Have you met Ted ?"
- Wait. No, no, no.
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We're not playing "Have you met Ted ?"
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Hi, have you met Ted ?
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Hi, I'm Ted.
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Yasmine.
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That's a very pretty name.
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Thanks. It's Lebanese.
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I'm exhausted.
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It was finger-painting day at school,
74
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and a five year-old boy got to second base with me.
75
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Wow ! You're cooking ?
76
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Yes, I am.
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Aw...
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Are you sure that's a good idea ?
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After last time, you looked really creepy without eyebrows.
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I can handle this.
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I think you'll find I'm full of surprises tonight.
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So, there's more surprises ?
Like what ?
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Marshall was in his second year of law school,
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so he was pretty good at thinking on his feet.
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Boogedyboo !
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And that's all of 'em.
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I'm gonna go... cook.
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I'm so happy for Marshall, I really am.
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I just couldn't imagine settling down right now.
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So, do you think you'll ever get married ?
91
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Well, maybe eventually...
92
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some fall day, possibly in Central Park.
93
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Simple ceremony.
We'll write our own vows.
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Band, no DJ.
People will dance !
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I'm not gonna worry about it !
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Damn it, why did Marshall have to get engaged ?
97
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Yeah, nothing hotter than a guy planning out his own imaginary wedding, huh ?
98
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- Actually, I think it's cute.
- Well, you're clearly drunk.
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One more for the lady !
100
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Oh, hey, look what I got.
101
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Oh, honey ! Champagne.
102
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Yeah.
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No. You are too old to be scared to open a bottle of champagne.
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- I'm not scared.
- Then open it.
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Fine.
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Please open it ?
107
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You are unbelievable, Marshall.
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There are two big questions a man has to ask in life.
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One, you plan out for months.
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The other just slips out when you're half drunk at some bar.
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Will you marry me ?
112
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You wanna go out sometime ?
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Of course, you idiot !
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I'm sorry, Carl's my boyfriend.
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'Sup, Carl ?
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I promised Ted we wouldn't do that.
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Did you know there's a Pop Tart under your fridge ?
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No, but dibs.
119
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Where's that champagne ?
120
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I wanna drink a toast with my fianc�e.
121
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I don't know why I was so scared of this.
122
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It's pretty easy, right ?
123
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Why am I freaking out all of a sudden ?
124
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This is crazy.
I'm not ready to settle down.
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How does Carl land a Lebanese girl ?
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The plan has always been don't even think about it until you're 30.
127
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Exactly. The guy doesn't even own a suit.
128
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Plus, Marshall's found the love of his life.
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Even if I was ready, which I'm not...
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but if I was, it's, like, "Okay, I'm ready. Where is she ?"
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And there she was.
132
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It was like something from an old movie,
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where the sailor sees the girl across the crowded dance floor,
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turns to his buddy and says, "See that girl ?
135
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I'm gonna marry her someday."
136
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Hey, Barney, see that girl ?
137
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Oh, yeah. You just know she likes it dirty.
138
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Go say hi.
139
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I can't just go say hi.
140
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I need a plan.
141
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I'm gonna wait until she goes to the bathroom,
142
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then I'll strategically place myself by the jukebox...
143
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Hi, have you met Ted ?
144
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Let me guess... Ted.
145
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Sorry, Lilly.
I'm so sorry.
146
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- Take us to the hospital.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
147
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Did you hit her ?
148
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Hit me ? Please !
149
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This guy can barely even spank me in bed for fun.
150
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He's all like, "Oh, honey. Did that hurt ?"
151
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And, I'm like, "Come on !
Let me have it, you pansy !"
152
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- Wow, a complete stranger.
- No, no, no, no ! It's okay.
153
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Go on.
154
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So, these, uh, spankings...
155
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you in pajamas or au naturel ?
156
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So, what do you do ?
157
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I'm a reporter for Metro News One.
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Well, kind of a reporter.
159
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I do those dumb little fluff pieces at the end of the news.
160
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You know, like, um...
161
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monkey who can play the ukulele.
162
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I'm hoping to get some bigger stories soon.
163
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Bigger, like, uh... gorilla with an upright bass ?
164
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Sorry. You're really pretty.
165
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Oh, your friends don't seem to happy.
166
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Yeah, see, the one in the middle just got dumped by her boyfriend.
167
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So, tonight, every guy is "the enemy."
168
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You know if it'll make your friend feel better,
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you could throw a drink in my face. I don't mind.
170
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She would love that !
171
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And it does look fun in the movies.
172
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Hey, you wanna have dinner with me Saturday night ?
173
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Oh, I can't.
174
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I'm going to Orlando for a week on Friday.
175
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Some guy's attempting to make the world's biggest pancake.
176
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Guess who's covering it ?
177
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That's gonna take a week ?
178
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Yeah, he's gonna eat it, too.
It's another record.
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Hey ! What's takin' so long ?
180
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Uh, I know this is a long shot, but how 'bout tomorrow night ?
181
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Yeah. What the hell ?
182
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Jerk !
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That was fun.
184
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De... wait for it... nied !
185
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Denied !
186
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We're goin' out tomorrow night.
187
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I thought we were playin' laser tag tomorrow night.
188
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Yeah, I was never gonna go play laser tag.
189
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The next night, I took her out to this little bistro in Brooklyn.
190
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That is one badass blue French horn.
191
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Yeah.
192
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Sort of looks like a Smurf penis.
193
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Son, a piece of advice :
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when you go on a first date, you really don't wanna say "Smurf penis."
195
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Girls don't ordinarily like that.
196
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But this was no ordinary girl.
197
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Lilly ?
198
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How long have you been sitting there ?
199
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Stupid eye patch.
200
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Mom, Dad, I have found the future Mrs. Ted Mosby.
201
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Marshall, how have I always described my perfect woman ?
202
00:08:54,677 --> 00:08:57,432
Now, let's see... she likes dogs ?
203
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I've got five dogs.
204
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She drinks scotch ?
205
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I love a scotch that's old enough to order its own scotch.
206
00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:04,679
Can quote obscure lines from Ghostbusters ?
207
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Ray ! When someone asks you if you're a god, you say "Yes !"
208
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And I'm saving the best for last.
209
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Do you want these ?
I hate olives.
210
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She hates olives ! Awesome !
211
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The olive theory.
212
00:09:17,822 --> 00:09:20,598
The olive theory is based on my friends Marshall and Lilly.
213
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He hates olives, she loves them.
214
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In a weird way, that's what makes them such a great couple.
215
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Perfect balance.
216
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You know, I've had a jar of olives just sitting in my fridge forever.
217
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I could take 'em off your hands.
218
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They're all yours.
219
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Oh, it is on !
220
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It is on till the break of dawn.
221
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But wait.
222
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It's only the break of 10:30.
What happened ?
223
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I gotta get one of those blue French horns for over my fireplace.
224
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It's gotta be blue.
It's gotta be French.
225
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,057
- No green clarinet ?
- Nope.
226
00:09:53,057 --> 00:09:54,588
Come on. No purple tuba ?
227
00:09:54,588 --> 00:09:56,635
It's a Smurf penis or no dice.
228
00:09:57,904 --> 00:09:58,833
There you are !
229
00:09:58,833 --> 00:09:59,931
We got a jumper.
230
00:09:59,931 --> 00:10:01,845
Some crazy guy on the Manhattan Bridge.
231
00:10:01,845 --> 00:10:03,386
Come on. You're coverin' it !
232
00:10:03,884 --> 00:10:06,149
Um... all right.
I'll be right there.
233
00:10:07,278 --> 00:10:08,477
I'm sorry.
234
00:10:09,319 --> 00:10:11,330
I had a really great time tonight.
235
00:10:12,385 --> 00:10:13,404
Yeah.
236
00:10:13,404 --> 00:10:15,394
So ?! Did you kiss her ?
237
00:10:15,741 --> 00:10:17,563
No. The moment wasn't right.
238
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Look, this woman could actually be my future wife.
239
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I want our first kiss to be amazing.
240
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Aw, Ted, that is so sweet.
241
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So you chickened out like a little bitch.
242
00:10:28,135 --> 00:10:30,163
What ? I did not chicken out.
243
00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:30,798
You know what ?
244
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I don't need to take first kiss advice from some pirate
245
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who hasn't been single since the first week of college.
246
00:10:35,456 --> 00:10:38,026
Anyone who's single would tell you the same thing,
247
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even the dumbest single person alive.
248
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And if you don't believe me, call him.
249
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Hey, loser.
250
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How's not playing laser tag ?
251
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Because playing laser tag is awesome !
252
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- Oh, I killed you, Conner !
- Don't make me get your mom !
253
00:10:51,625 --> 00:10:53,698
Hey, listen.
I need your opinion on something.
254
00:10:53,698 --> 00:10:55,251
Okay, meet me at the bar in 15 minutes.
255
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And suit up !
256
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So, these guys think I chickened out.
257
00:10:59,657 --> 00:11:00,758
What do you think ?
258
00:11:00,758 --> 00:11:04,549
I can't believe you're still not wearing a suit.
259
00:11:05,620 --> 00:11:06,898
She didn't even give me the signal.
260
00:11:06,898 --> 00:11:09,752
What, is she gonna, she gonna bat her eyes ayou in Morse code ?
261
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:14,724
"Ted... kiss me."
No ! You just kiss her !
262
00:11:14,724 --> 00:11:16,725
Not if you don't get the signal.
263
00:11:19,700 --> 00:11:21,320
Did Marshall give me the signal ?
264
00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:23,713
No ! I didn't. I swear.
265
00:11:25,565 --> 00:11:26,651
But, see, at least tonight,
266
00:11:26,651 --> 00:11:28,199
I get to sleep knowing Marshall and me,
267
00:11:28,199 --> 00:11:28,979
never gonna happen.
268
00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:30,245
You should have kissed her.
269
00:11:30,825 --> 00:11:32,275
Oh, I should have kissed her.
270
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:34,367
Well, maybe in a week when she gets back from Orlando.
271
00:11:34,367 --> 00:11:36,627
A week ? That's like a year in hot girl time.
272
00:11:36,627 --> 00:11:37,837
She'll forget all about you.
273
00:11:37,837 --> 00:11:41,158
Mark my words... you will never see that one again.
274
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:42,756
There she is.
275
00:11:42,756 --> 00:11:45,791
Ooh ! She's cute.
Hey, Carl, turn it up.
276
00:11:45,791 --> 00:11:47,750
...persuaded him to reconsider.
277
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,807
At which point, the man came down off the ledge,
278
00:11:49,807 --> 00:11:52,690
giving this bizarre story a happy ending.
279
00:11:52,690 --> 00:11:55,116
- Reporting from Metro One News...
- Guy didn't jump.
280
00:11:56,755 --> 00:11:58,066
I'm gonna go kiss her.
281
00:11:58,434 --> 00:11:59,202
Right now.
282
00:11:59,202 --> 00:12:00,582
Look, dude.
It's midnight.
283
00:12:00,582 --> 00:12:04,323
As your future lawyer, I'm gonna advise you that's freakin' crazy.
284
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:05,801
I never do anything crazy.
285
00:12:05,801 --> 00:12:08,334
I'm always waiting for the moment, planning the moment.
286
00:12:08,724 --> 00:12:09,704
Well, she's leaving tomorrow.
287
00:12:09,704 --> 00:12:11,197
This may be the only moment I'm gonna get.
288
00:12:11,770 --> 00:12:13,038
I gotta do what that guy couldn't.
289
00:12:13,038 --> 00:12:14,727
I gotta take the leap !
290
00:12:15,684 --> 00:12:16,905
Okay, not a perfect metaphor,
291
00:12:16,905 --> 00:12:18,404
'cause for me it's fall in love and get married,
292
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:20,444
and for him it's... death.
293
00:12:21,354 --> 00:12:23,046
Actually, that is a perfect metaphor.
294
00:12:23,606 --> 00:12:25,710
By the way, did I congratulate you two ?
295
00:12:27,313 --> 00:12:28,773
I'm doing this.
296
00:12:29,093 --> 00:12:29,977
Let's go.
297
00:12:29,977 --> 00:12:31,730
- Word up.
- We're coming with you.
298
00:12:32,657 --> 00:12:33,533
Barney ?
299
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:37,141
All right, but under one condition.
300
00:12:38,579 --> 00:12:41,147
Look at you, you beautiful bastard. You suited up !
301
00:12:41,147 --> 00:12:42,913
This is totally going in my blog !
302
00:12:44,155 --> 00:12:44,859
Stop the car.
303
00:12:44,859 --> 00:12:46,296
Uh, pull over right here.
304
00:12:47,748 --> 00:12:49,090
I gotta do something.
305
00:12:49,906 --> 00:12:51,895
Excuse me. Pardon me. Just a sec'.
306
00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:53,512
Enjoy your coffee.
307
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:57,043
Go ! Go ! Go !
308
00:12:59,772 --> 00:13:01,615
Everybody brings flowers.
309
00:13:10,022 --> 00:13:11,056
Okay.
310
00:13:11,056 --> 00:13:12,254
Moment of truth.
311
00:13:13,180 --> 00:13:14,196
Wish me luck.
312
00:13:14,196 --> 00:13:16,998
Ted's gonna get it on with a TV reporter.
313
00:13:16,998 --> 00:13:19,443
"This just in." Okay.
314
00:13:22,441 --> 00:13:24,303
Kiss her, Ted !
Kiss her good !
315
00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:25,667
Kiss the crap outta that girl !
316
00:13:25,667 --> 00:13:27,787
Marshall, remember this night.
317
00:13:27,787 --> 00:13:29,951
When you're the best man at our wedding and you give a speech,
318
00:13:29,951 --> 00:13:32,057
you're gonna tell this story.
319
00:13:33,702 --> 00:13:35,387
Why does he get to be the best man ?
320
00:13:35,387 --> 00:13:37,434
I'm your best friend !
321
00:13:38,369 --> 00:13:41,825
As I walked up to that door, a million thoughts raced through my mind.
322
00:13:41,825 --> 00:13:44,294
Unfortunately, one particular thought did not.
323
00:13:44,294 --> 00:13:46,065
I've got five dogs.
324
00:13:48,071 --> 00:13:49,489
Not good. Not good.
325
00:13:49,489 --> 00:13:51,157
- No !
- Get back in there !
326
00:13:51,157 --> 00:13:52,773
You're wearing a suit !
327
00:13:56,039 --> 00:13:57,305
Ted ?
328
00:13:58,296 --> 00:13:59,158
Hi.
329
00:14:01,663 --> 00:14:03,053
I was just, uh...
330
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,327
Come on up.
331
00:14:10,615 --> 00:14:11,428
He's in.
332
00:14:12,746 --> 00:14:13,712
So...
333
00:14:13,712 --> 00:14:16,872
Ranjit, you must have done it with a Lebanese girl ?
334
00:14:16,872 --> 00:14:19,102
Okay, that's my Barney limit.
335
00:14:19,102 --> 00:14:21,628
I'm gonna see if that bodega has a bathroom.
336
00:14:22,343 --> 00:14:25,204
Actually, I'm from Bangladesh.
337
00:14:25,204 --> 00:14:26,708
The women hot there ?
338
00:14:26,708 --> 00:14:29,033
Here's a picture of my wife.
339
00:14:31,007 --> 00:14:32,950
A simple "no" would have sufficed.
340
00:14:34,124 --> 00:14:35,529
She's lovely.
341
00:14:36,780 --> 00:14:41,427
So, Ted, what brings you back to Brooklyn at 1:00 in the morning in a suit ?
342
00:14:42,613 --> 00:14:44,505
I was just hoping to...
343
00:14:45,239 --> 00:14:46,641
get those olives...
344
00:14:47,090 --> 00:14:48,480
that you said I could have.
345
00:14:49,148 --> 00:14:51,525
Would you like those olives with some gin and vermouth ?
346
00:14:52,033 --> 00:14:54,033
Are you trying to get me drunk ?
347
00:14:57,984 --> 00:14:59,275
For starters.
348
00:15:06,581 --> 00:15:10,002
So, Marshall, this olive theory, based on you and Lilly ?
349
00:15:10,002 --> 00:15:11,558
You hate olives.
350
00:15:11,558 --> 00:15:13,492
Lilly loves 'em.
You can't stand 'em.
351
00:15:13,492 --> 00:15:14,839
Yeah. Hate olives.
352
00:15:14,839 --> 00:15:19,460
Two weeks ago, Spanish bar on 79th street, dish of olives, you had some... what up ?
353
00:15:22,732 --> 00:15:25,734
You have to swear that this does not leave this cab.
354
00:15:25,734 --> 00:15:27,734
- I swear.
- I swear.
355
00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:32,120
On our first date, I ordered a Greek salad.
356
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:34,012
Lilly asked if she could have my olives.
357
00:15:34,012 --> 00:15:38,311
- I said, "Sure. I hate olives."
- But, you like olives.
358
00:15:38,311 --> 00:15:40,783
Well, I was 18, okay ?
I was a virgin.
359
00:15:40,783 --> 00:15:43,985
Been waitin' my whole life for a pretty girl to want my olives.
360
00:15:45,091 --> 00:15:47,542
Marshall, I'm gonna give you an early wedding present.
361
00:15:48,105 --> 00:15:49,686
Don't get married.
362
00:15:57,978 --> 00:15:59,897
I think I like your olive theory.
363
00:16:00,463 --> 00:16:02,553
I think I like your new French horn.
364
00:16:03,556 --> 00:16:05,370
I think I like your nose.
365
00:16:06,584 --> 00:16:08,518
I think I'm in love with you.
366
00:16:08,518 --> 00:16:11,217
What ?! What ?! What ?!
367
00:16:11,924 --> 00:16:13,643
Come on, man, you said your stomach's been hurting, right ?
368
00:16:13,643 --> 00:16:14,953
You know what that is.
369
00:16:14,953 --> 00:16:15,685
Hunger.
370
00:16:15,685 --> 00:16:17,524
You're hungry for experience.
371
00:16:17,524 --> 00:16:19,025
Hungry for something new.
372
00:16:19,025 --> 00:16:21,094
Hungry for olives.
373
00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:24,184
But you're too scared to do anything about it.
374
00:16:24,184 --> 00:16:26,029
Yeah, I'm scared, okay ?
375
00:16:27,549 --> 00:16:29,924
But, when I think of spending the rest of my life with Lilly...
376
00:16:30,509 --> 00:16:33,390
committing, forever, no other women...
377
00:16:33,962 --> 00:16:35,808
doesn't scare me at all.
378
00:16:36,526 --> 00:16:38,496
I'm marrying that girl.
379
00:16:39,895 --> 00:16:41,075
Lilly.
380
00:16:41,984 --> 00:16:43,689
Lilly, I like olives.
381
00:16:44,445 --> 00:16:46,177
We'll make it work.
382
00:16:57,891 --> 00:17:00,160
So, Orlando.
You gonna hit Disneyworld ?
383
00:17:01,786 --> 00:17:03,428
You love me ?!
384
00:17:04,108 --> 00:17:05,784
I-I-I can't believe I said that.
385
00:17:05,784 --> 00:17:08,236
Why did I say that ?
Who says that ?
386
00:17:08,750 --> 00:17:10,116
I should just go.
387
00:17:10,116 --> 00:17:11,259
Hold on.
388
00:17:11,259 --> 00:17:12,663
Wait a minute.
389
00:17:15,162 --> 00:17:16,385
Promised you these.
390
00:17:16,385 --> 00:17:19,366
Olives.
Thanks. I love you.
391
00:17:19,366 --> 00:17:21,344
What is wrong with me ?
392
00:17:23,081 --> 00:17:24,225
Why are we still sitting here ?
393
00:17:24,225 --> 00:17:25,849
Let's go. We can still make last call.
394
00:17:25,849 --> 00:17:26,706
What do you say, Lil ?
395
00:17:26,706 --> 00:17:29,239
Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum ?
396
00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:32,844
'Cause you're a pirate.
397
00:17:33,270 --> 00:17:35,136
Okay, eye patch, gone.
398
00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,836
And we can't just abandon Ted.
399
00:17:37,836 --> 00:17:40,563
If it doesn't go well up there, he's gonna need some support.
400
00:17:40,563 --> 00:17:42,367
It's been, like, 20 minutes.
401
00:17:42,367 --> 00:17:43,662
You think they're doin' it ?
402
00:17:43,662 --> 00:17:45,037
You think they're doin' it in front of the dogs ?
403
00:17:45,037 --> 00:17:46,337
Doggy style.
404
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,690
Hey, there was a girl in college, she had this golden retriever...
405
00:17:48,690 --> 00:17:51,118
Okay, we can go to the bar.
Just stop talking.
406
00:17:51,118 --> 00:17:52,296
Hit it, Ranjit.
407
00:17:57,666 --> 00:17:59,453
So, when you tell this story to your friends,
408
00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:01,520
could you avoid the word "psycho ?"
409
00:18:01,889 --> 00:18:04,456
I'd prefer. "eccentric."
410
00:18:04,639 --> 00:18:06,951
Good night... psycho.
411
00:18:11,155 --> 00:18:11,899
Great.
412
00:18:11,899 --> 00:18:13,600
Um, how do I get to the F train ?
413
00:18:13,988 --> 00:18:17,928
Oh, um, two blocks that way and take a right.
414
00:18:21,164 --> 00:18:22,373
You know what ?
415
00:18:23,744 --> 00:18:25,378
I'm done being single.
416
00:18:25,826 --> 00:18:27,203
I'm not good at it.
417
00:18:27,203 --> 00:18:30,865
Look, obviously, you can't tell a woman you just met you love her.
418
00:18:30,865 --> 00:18:33,651
But... it sucks that you can't.
419
00:18:34,970 --> 00:18:35,857
I'll tell you something, though.
420
00:18:35,857 --> 00:18:39,604
If a woman... not you, just some hypothetical woman...
421
00:18:39,604 --> 00:18:41,382
were to bear with me through all this,
422
00:18:42,325 --> 00:18:43,908
I think I'd make a damn good husband.
423
00:18:43,908 --> 00:18:45,707
Because, that's the stuff I'd be good at,
424
00:18:45,707 --> 00:18:49,153
stuff like making her laugh and being a good father.
425
00:18:50,413 --> 00:18:52,569
And walking her five hypothetical dogs.
426
00:18:54,251 --> 00:18:55,547
Being a good kisser.
427
00:18:56,889 --> 00:18:58,542
Everyone thinks they're a good kisser.
428
00:18:58,542 --> 00:19:00,106
Oh, I've got references.
429
00:19:01,284 --> 00:19:02,380
Good night, Ted.
430
00:19:08,591 --> 00:19:10,834
And I'm a good handshaker.
431
00:19:10,834 --> 00:19:13,285
That's a pretty great handshake.
432
00:19:16,663 --> 00:19:17,813
And that was it.
433
00:19:17,813 --> 00:19:19,613
I'll probably never see her again.
434
00:19:22,298 --> 00:19:23,260
What ?
435
00:19:23,260 --> 00:19:24,444
That was the signal.
436
00:19:24,444 --> 00:19:28,175
That long, lingering handshake ?
You should have kissed her.
437
00:19:28,408 --> 00:19:30,368
There's no such thing as "the signal."
438
00:19:30,752 --> 00:19:32,580
But, yeah, that was the signal.
439
00:19:33,335 --> 00:19:34,532
Signal.
440
00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:36,983
Ah, Carl, thank you.
441
00:19:36,983 --> 00:19:38,863
Something I gotta do.
442
00:19:39,794 --> 00:19:42,246
By the way, you should have kissed her.
443
00:19:42,584 --> 00:19:44,633
Carl ! You guys weren't there.
444
00:19:46,274 --> 00:19:49,006
I am so turned on right now.
445
00:19:49,349 --> 00:19:50,594
Guys, trust me.
446
00:19:50,594 --> 00:19:51,999
I've seen the signal.
447
00:19:51,999 --> 00:19:53,603
That was not the signal.
448
00:19:53,603 --> 00:19:55,531
Yeah, Ted, we're not on you anymore.
449
00:19:56,725 --> 00:19:59,905
- To my fianc�e.
- To the future.
450
00:19:59,905 --> 00:20:01,732
To one hell of a night !
451
00:20:04,805 --> 00:20:07,397
That was not the signal.
452
00:20:08,117 --> 00:20:09,709
I asked her about it years later.
453
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:11,783
And, yeah, that was the signal.
454
00:20:11,783 --> 00:20:13,272
I could have kissed her.
455
00:20:13,272 --> 00:20:15,146
But that's the funny thing about destiny.
456
00:20:15,146 --> 00:20:17,175
It happens whether you plan it or not.
457
00:20:17,175 --> 00:20:19,061
I mean, I never thought I'd see that girl again,
458
00:20:19,061 --> 00:20:21,782
but it turns out I was just too close to the puzzle
459
00:20:21,782 --> 00:20:23,525
to see the picture that was forming.
460
00:20:23,525 --> 00:20:27,880
Because, that, kids, is the true story of how I met your Aunt Robin.
461
00:20:29,209 --> 00:20:30,481
Aunt Robin ?
462
00:20:30,481 --> 00:20:32,472
I thought this was how you met mom !
463
00:20:32,472 --> 00:20:34,509
Will you relax ?
I'm getting to it.
464
00:20:34,838 --> 00:20:38,540
Like I said, it's a long story.
465
00:20:39,814 --> 00:20:44,852
Transcripts : Raceman
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