All language subtitles for Batman S03E19 Nora Clavicle and the Ladies Crime Club.DVDVRip.NonHI.en.WB

A festive day in Gotham City.

And at a civic luncheon
at the Gotham-Astoria...

Police Commissioner Gordon is being
honored for 2 5 years of faithful service.

For he's a jolly good fellow

For he's a jolly good fellow

For he's a jolly good fellow

Which nobody can deny

Which nobody can deny

Oh. Thank you, Chief O'Hara. But
I really don't think I deserve all this.

- Daddy, you're too modest.
- Sure on that, he is.

Right, Mr. Wayne?

The commissioner deserves
far more than we can ever repay.

He's given the best years
of his life to Gotham City.

Where the devil
is Mayor Linseed?

He's supposed to present a
special award to the commissioner.

There he is now,
with Mrs. Linseed.

They seem to be
arguing about something.

Ladies and gentlemen, as
a token of our appreciation...

for Commissioner
Gordon's long service...

I wish to present him with
this 24-karat gold watch.

- Commissioner.
- Oh, thank you.

And now...

due to circumstances
beyond my control...

uh, that is, um, due to
overwhelming considerations...

I hereby discharge
Commissioner Gordon.

And in his stead, I appoint...

as the new police
commissioner of Gotham City...

Ms. Nora Clavicle.

The famous Nora Clavicle.

I didn't realize her crusade
for women had gone this far.

I'd say she's won that crusade.

Saints preserve us.

Saints preserve us all.

Thank you, Mayor Linseed.

As the new police
commissioner...

I intend to carry on my
crusade for women's rights.

And to prove that women can
run Gotham City better than men.

Much better.

So my first official act will be
to appoint a new police chief.

Mrs. Linseed.

I had no other
choice, Mr. Wayne.

My wife is such a devoted follower
of Ms. Clavicle's crusade for women...

that she refused to cook
or clean or wash my shirts...

until I appointed Ms. Clavicle
commissioner of police.

I've worn this shirt for a week.

I haven't had a
decent meal in months.

It's all right, Mayor
Linseed. We understand.

Commissioner...

can you ever forgive me?

Of course, Mayor Linseed, I
understand how difficult it was for you.

The question is, how difficult is
it going to be for Gotham City?

One moment, sir.

I mean, ma'am.

It's her, sir.

Yes, Ms. Clavicle?

Commissioner Clavicle, Batman...

calling to tell you you can
take an extended vacation.

We girls are
handling things now...

and we won't need
any help from you men...

bat or otherwise.

Goodbye, Batman.

Hmm. There's something
curious about this affair.

Very curious, indeed, sir.

Well, we're dressed for
investigating, let's investigate.

There's nothing to
investigate yet, Robin.

However, we could take a ride
around Gotham City just in case.

Well, good luck, sir. We men
are counting on you, you know.

Right, Alfred.

To the Batmobile.

While, in the secret closet behind
Barbara Gordon's bedroom...

Batgirl has a very similar idea.

But even as she starts
her own investigation...

what's happening in
Commissioner Gordon's...

Er, Commissioner
Clavicle's office?

Nora, what you're
doing is wonderful.

Women will finally take their
rightful place in the world.

Half the credit is
yours, Millie dear.

You reorganized the
police department.

It was nothing, really.

Nothing?

To fire every man on the police force
and replace them all with women...

that was quite a job.

Well, I'd better see that
things are running smoothly.

You do that, dear.

Ah. Now that she's out of the way, you
girls may proceed with Operation Ransack...

while I proceed with
Operation Disaster Insurance.

But what about Batman
and Robin, boss?

Those masked menfolk? Pshaw.

And what about Batgirl?

Oh, yes. I forgot about her.

With a woman helping them...

Batman and Robin might
just give us some trouble.

But all we have to do is make
a call and lead them into a trap.

We, uh, can't call them,
boss. You, uh, cut the wire.

So I did. But we can
still lead them into a trap.

Well, how? How can we find them?

Where does one usually
find Batman and Robin?

Well, usually they're at
the scene of some crime...

Aha.

Heh. Oh, yes, I
see what you mean.

Later at the Gotham City Bank, Angelina and
Evelina are making the scene. Of a crime.

Hand over the goodies
and don't dawdle.

- Officer!
- Oh!

Now look what you've made me do.

But there's a robbery.

It's all smeared.

Then add a little paprika and simmer
over a little flame for 15 minutes.

- Don't forget the bay leaves.
- And a peppercorn or two.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you? When my
bank's just been burgled?

I hadn't thought of
bay leaves. Yeah.

Officer, chase them!
They've just robbed my bank!

How can I chase them
when they have the car?

And all I have are my new Givenchy shoes.
And I'm certainly not gonna wreck them.

What's that, Car 6? A
clearance sale at Arbech's?

Ooh!

Calling all cars.

Girls, listen. Arbech's has just marked
all their dresses down 20 percent.

I've been cruising around myself, Batman,
and everything seems to be normal so far.

Don't forget the shoe
sale at Dubar's, girls.

Wonderful bargains.

Oh, by the way...

Gotham National Bank
has just been robbed.

But the big news is the
two-for-one sale at Slob's Drugs.

- Holy bargain basements, Batman.
- Our concern is the bargain hunters...

- at the Gotham National Bank.
- Right, Batman.

Thank goodness
you're here, Batman.

Two girl bank robbers just robbed my
bank, while the policewomen did nothing.

Then they took off into
thin air in a getaway car.

Sometimes you can see
a great deal in thin air, sir.

You mean, back to the
Batcomputer in the Batcave, Batman?

No time. We'll use the portable
Batcomputer in the Batmobile.

I think I'll tag along, Batman.

The instruments in the
Batgirl-cycle aren't as sophisticated...

- as those in the Batmobile.
- Thank you.

Following the portable
Batcomputer's lead...

the terrific trio drop in on the
warehouse of Dropstitch & Company...

manufacturers of
fine knitting needles.

But who has the drop on whom?

Don't make a move, Batgirl.

Nor you either, Dynamic Duo.

Holy knit one, purl two.

Exactly, Boy Wonder.

This needle is razor-sharp and can
puncture her jugular vein in an instant.

All right, girls.

Let's tie the terrific trio into
terrific Siamese human knots.

You are wise to stay motionless.

Or you will be
the terminated trio.

The slightest move by any one of you
will only draw the human knot tighter.

Crush your bones...

and strangle you.

Holy hamstrings.

Exactly, Robin.

This is torture...

at its most bizarre
and terrible.

I understand your desire to
checkmate us, Ms. Clavicle.

Commissioner Clavicle, Batman.

But I strongly suspect
there's more to your scheme...

than just tying us in a
Siamese human knot.

Very observant, Batman.

And you're right. There is more.

Much more.

As soon as night falls...

I'm planning to destroy
all of Gotham City.

- All of Gotham City?
- Why?

Do you know what this
document is, Batman?

If I dared move my head, I
might recognize it. But I daren't.

It's an insurance
policy on Gotham City.

Holy underwritten metropolis.

Exactly, boy bowknot.

I've insured Gotham
City for 10 million dollars.

And what do you
think it cost me?

Two hundred dollars, perhaps?

Two hundred dollars for
a 10-million-dollar policy?

Yes, Batgirl. Because
the risk is so low.

The chances of destroying
an entire city are infinitesimal.

Right again, Batman.

But Gotham City
will be destroyed.

I'll collect the 10 million...

and there won't be any
witnesses around to make trouble.

Oh, you'll find it completely impossible
to ever get out of that human knot.

But it will all be over soon.

Come on, Evelina. Angelina should
be outside with the truck by now.

Don't move.

Do we dare breathe, Batman?

Cautiously, Robin. Cautiously.

Talking has been
dangerous enough.

A deep breath might prove fatal.

Are they all set to go off?
One half hour after sunset?

Yes, boss.

Good. That will give them time to
distribute themselves throughout the city.

And when they explode...

there won't be a building
left standing in Gotham City.

Oh, they're darling
little creatures.

Lovely. Lovely.

I loathe standing in
lines, Chief O'Hara.

Well, at least it's only one
day a week, commissioner.

Besides, uh, what
else can we do?

Get other jobs.

But we've been policemen
almost all of our lives.

- We don't know how to do anything else.
- True enough, Chief O'Hara.

We only know one trade, and
suddenly that trade is closed to us.

Taken over by women.

Begorra, the shame of it.

I can't stand this
much longer, Batman.

I'm getting terrible
cramps in my legs.

- Good.
- Good?

Terrible cramps?

Exactly, Robin.

The involuntary muscular
contractions in Batgirl's legs...

may indirectly relieve the
tension in your lower lumbar region.

Holy slipped disk.

Not quite, Robin.

If I can wiggle my ears...

and if you are able to
bend the fourth finger...

on your left hand just
a fraction of an inch...

You might strangle us all.

Release us, Batgirl.

It's the basic formula for escaping
from a Siamese human knot.

I just recalled it. Ready?

- Ready, Robin?
- Ready.

I'm beginning to wiggle
my ears under my cowl.

All right.

Releasing my fourth finger.

I'm wiggling.

I've got it.

Gosh, Batman. What a simple way
to get out of a Siamese human knot.

But what do we do now?

Yes, we really
know nothing of Ms...

Commissioner Clavicle's
plan to destroy Gotham City.

Perhaps we can start with that.

What's inside it?

A high explosive charge
and a timing device.

Apparently set to go off a
half an hour after sunset.

But how could
a little charge...?

- Holy mechanical armies.
- Exactly, Robin.

There's a legion of these lethal mice whirring
through Gotham City at this very moment.

- We can't catch them all. Not before dark.
- I know.

Robin, call Chief O'Ha... Chief
Linseed on the police channel.

Tell her to mobilize her entire force and
send them out to gather up these mice.

I'll be back by the
time you finish that call.

Connect me with Chief Linseed,
please. It's an emergency.

Chief Linseed?

Yes, Robin?

We know about the mice.

But I'm afraid my police force
won't be very much help to you.

Officer, are those
mice still down there?

Yes, Chief Linseed.

Oh, excuse me, Robin,
I'm afraid I'm going to faint.

Me too.

I might have known you can't get
policewomen to help you catch mice.

It's diabolical.

I'm afraid you're right, Robin.
But we may have one last hope.

What are you doing, Batman?
This is no time for games.

Robin, look.

How did you do it, Batman?

There's no time
to explain, Robin.

I want you both to play exactly
the same tune that you just heard.

Batgirl, you take the east
side, Robin, take west side.

East side, west side. I'll go through
midtown. We'll meet at the docks.

- But...
- Just play, Robin.

Play for all you're worth.

With only moments
left before disaster...

the terrific trio and
their retinue of rodents...

arrive at dockside.

We made it.

With very few moments to spare.

But how did you know
they'd follow us, Batman?

I was able to determine that the
guidance systems in the mice...

was built around the principle
of high-frequency radar.

So by selecting the right
combination of flute toots...

I was able to cause those mice
and their homing mechanisms...

to zero in on the source
of the sounds: the flutes.

The pied pipers of Gotham City.

You might say that.

I see you have some
interesting freight there.

That we do, Batman. Caught
them at the edge of town.

Just as you said we might
when you phoned me.

They were exceeding the speed
limit by a considerable margin, sir...

so we thought it best to
take them into custody.

You can't arrest us.
You have no power.

Citizen's arrest, me
fine-feathered females. Heh.

You should have bought some
prison insurance, Ms. Clavicle.

She'll need it where she's going,
Boy Wonder. A long-term policy...

with Warden Crichton
as the beneficiary.

It'll be nice to have our old jobs
backs again, won't it, commissioner?

It will indeed, Chief
O'Hara. It will indeed.

Well, with Nora
Clavicord behind bars...

- Chief O'Hara, that's Clavicle.
- Oh.

Well, a rose by any
other name, commissioner.

And what a rose she was.

With Mrs. Linseed
under her thumb...

and all those exploding
mice under her feet.

Yes. At least she didn't pull it off.
Thanks to Batman, Robin and Batgirl.

Do you think we'll have a
breather now, commissioner?

Oh, unless we get some
disturbing phone call, Chief O'Hara.

Commissioner Gordon.

Penguin?

Just let me ask you
one thing, commissioner.

Did you ever hear of the
lethal Lygerian fruit fly?

And Commissioner Gordon certainly
will hear of lethal Lygerian fruit flies.

And so shall we all when Penguin
pulls his insidious insect antic...

in our next episode.